Severus
'I'm one of them. He said so,' Holly mumbled, gripping the teacup tighter.
'You lost me with the Parsletongue. I feel…' Severus flexed his hands, trying to name the most horrible feeling constricting his insides.
Powerless. We pushed the Dark Lord over the brink. He will do anything to get her now. I was wrong. About everything.
'Angry. I'm angry,' Holly's voice still cracked with sleep.
'You should have never consented to the Mark,' he said, glancing at her arm wrapped in a Murtlap-soaked bandage.She cradled it protectively to her chest.
'Then why didn't you stop it?'
'I promised I wouldn't interfere,' he worried a hand through his overlong hair. 'I told you I trust you.'
She gave him a side-eye and took a shaky sip of tea. 'Well. I'm one of the Horcruxes. I have to die for him to die.'
'A prophecy only means something if you allow it to, you would do well to not heed it,' Severus said.
'But HE thinks it's true. If one of us thinks it's true, it's enough for it to be.'
Severus hung his head. Dumbledore suspected she was a Horcrux, he thought, broiling with guilt as he remembered the horrifically enlightening Veritaserum interview. He had always known her to be somehow connected to the Dark Lord, but before Dumbledore shared his suspicions, it was mostly a gut feeling. He'd been guessing at the how for years. Now that it was out in the open, it was more dooming than before.
Traitor. I carried the prophecy to the Dark Lord. I caused this chaos. It's all my fault.
'I will make him kill me. If it means he dies too,' Holly continued.
'Not an option.'
'It's the only option. You know it, Sev.'
'I forbid it.'
She snorted.
'We'll find another way,' he said, rising slowly before turning to flee the tent. He cast the wards about their abode for the second time that evening, making sure the protective cocktail of complex protective charms was strong enough to withstand the Dark Lord himself — even if just for mere minutes.
Severus watched the slumbering wilderness behind the tent, breathing deeply in an attempt to quell the horror caged inside. The wind stirred the leaves around the thickly carpeted forest floor and swaying branches created a stuttaco symphony of chattering and creaking. Faint moonlight sketched the trunks of ancient trees from the inky darkness. It smelled simultaneously of spring flowers, decaying leaves, and faint desperation.
Or is that just my imagination?
'There must be another way,' he gasped. Darkness was the reply.
Severus moved them a few kilometers eastward the following morning. They first set up camp in a glen near a Loch before they moved a second time — this move due to Holly's discovery of a shallow cave that would offer them superior shelter against the elements and unwelcome eyes.
He had her cast the wards, watching closely as she performed each. He found no reason not to have her repeat a spell he wasn't completely satisfied with. Luckily, she'd gotten used to his rigorous approach and simply indulged him by repeating the spells he deemed necessary. Her wand work was improving well, all considered. He told her this to cheer her up, but it did little to raise her dampened spirit.
A week passed with a murky mood. It wasn't only due to the rainy weather. They were both acutely aware of Walpurgis drawing ever closer. Like a stone stuck in his shoe, he was unable to shake the thought of it. It was akin to handling broken glass, he was turning it over and over in his mind to examine the danger from all angles. It cut deep with every musing, ragging his flesh and drawing blood. And yet, the edges never seemed to dull.
There were no jokes. Few conversations. No fights. No sex. She said it was her time of the month and Severus did everything he could to assure her, keeping his distance. He tried to give her time. Space. Whatever she needed. He foraged on a strict routine and cooked three meals a day, even when he wasn't hungry himself.
When she got too quiet, he dragged her out of their bedroll for activities such as mushroom hunting, dueling or even once fishing with magic. He was proud to have also convinced her to contact her friends on the plastic device. The bright light shining on her face at night while she was typing away quickly was the only time she truly smiled. One night, she took a photograph of the Mark with it. It unnerved him beyond reason, but he didn't ask who she sent it to. Or why.
Trust Holly, Dumbledore had kept repeating during the interview. Since then, he'd been forcing himself to trust her even though it went against his grain. It begged the question; Do I trust Dumbledore?
The answer was swift and final; I have no choice but to trust others.
Saturday started with a drizzle but soon turned to a bright afternoon. Holly was outside sunbathing on the grassy slope near the tree line while Severus lounged inside with his feet up, reading a second-hand account of Ivan the terrible's bloodcurdling attempts at creating his first (and only) Horcrux. The breeze carried voices to the tent, softly at first then loud enough to break through his occupied thoughts. He snapped shut his read and stumbled outside in a rush, almost tripping over the doormat.
He reached Holly in haste. 'What's wrong?'
She stood in the shade of a blossoming tree, her hair still in the plait he'd wrestled it into this morning.
'Dobby was just here,' she held up a pouch and a letter, smiling.
Severus exhaled, 'And?' He mentioned toward the letter, bemused. 'Open it.'
She tossed the pouch to him and tore greedily at the envelope. He held his breath, turning the small leather bag over in his hands, weighing the risks of opening it. There was something rotund and solid inside. Metal?
It could be cursed.
He peered over her shoulder, reading the letter she was now grinning at.
It took him but a second. 'Impossible,' he said weakly. She threw her head back and laughed.
He read it again, forcing himself not to grab it out of her hands. It was penned and signed in Kingsley's neat hand, addressed directly to Holly. He must have put two and two together — or Dobby must have told him it was the Chosen One who was hunting the Horcruxes. It was a reply to the anonymous message Severus sent to Kingsley over Christmas when he had just gauged the depth of the situation and was desperate for assistance in any form.
And here it is. 'Assistance' of the purest kind.
'You were right to trust Kingsley, Sev. They actually did it. Hufflepuff's cup, can you believe it!'
He ripped at the ties of the bag, desperate to lay eyes on the evidence, 'Motherf—'
'Sev!' She smacked his arm hard but laughed. 'Looks like a cup to me,' she commented gleefully, taking note of the twisted silver goblet he shimmied out of the pouch. 'It's all messed up,' she pointed at the Basilisk tooth still lodged in the warped metal.
'I never thought they'd actually find one— let alone destroy it. I had hoped for something, but this… exceeds my expectations.'
'They found it hidden in the Lestrange's vault in Gringrotts.' She bounced on the balls of her feet and did a little jig.
Severus studied the cup for a moment longer, then pulled the witch to him as she danced. He tightened his arms around her waist, afraid of letting go. She kissed him desperately and he swung her in a half-circle, drawing a beautiful peel of laughter from her lips and into his own. His hands delighted in her sun-warmed skin and breathed in the light scent of her blossoms in the crisp air.
Another Horcrux was destroyed. The win had them on a high, and the heavy fog of doom and gloom was expelled from their minds for a blissful while. He prepared a lunch of wild basil, sun-dried tomatoes, and Petunia's canned oysters on salty biscuits. A flat, sun-warmed rock proved to be the perfect spot for a transfigured picnic blanket.
She was appreciative of the snacks and, as always, gratefully gobbled up whatever he'd prepared. Too often, he was unnerved by her gratitude for even the simplest of meals — it screamed of the years she'd been fed scraps from the Dursley's table.
'It's good to have you back,' he said quietly in reply to lighthearted teasing (she contended he missed brewing potions so much he sought to apply his craft on their food stores.)
'I didn't go anywhere,' she answered, not turning away from the water.
Severus grunted, not wanting to dissect her good mood lest it fall apart like a sandcastle. He tore his eyes from her back and spotted a swath of wild strawberries crawling beneath the overhanging rock shelf they rested on. He bent to collect the tiny berries and silky petals of primrose met his fingers. On an impulse, he scooped up a handful of buttery yellow flowers too.
'Hold this,' he said, dropping down behind Holly and transferring the berries into her hands.
Holly popped a few into her mouth as he started to weave the flowers into her thick hair. When he was finished, she leaned over to study her reflection in the water. 'A crown fit for a princess,' she mused.
'Your lips are stained,' he murmured, drawing his thumb over her reddened mouth.
'Would you like to kiss me?' She asked, parting her lips. He tipped her chin toward him, eager to kiss her again. 'Cause you'll have to catch me first,' she whispered, then shrieked in delight and jumped up, running across the hot sand toward the loch.
Severus sat still, engaged but confused. 'By Salazar,' he grumbled before following her.
They ran alongside the lake, Severus in hot pursuit of the much more nimble witch.
'Is that… Minerva?!' He said loudly, pointing ahead. She stopped dead, skidding across pebbles and sand to look at the empty spot he'd pointed to, allowing him the chance to cut a corner across a flat rock she'd avoided. Her looking about for McGonagall cost her the head start. 'Cheater!' She yelled over her shoulder as he closed in on her. Severus wasted no time to bear down on her, pinning her to the sand, laughing too hard at her gullibility to be able to kiss her. They rolled around, each wrestling to be on top. He won by advantage of size.
'Filthy Slytherin!' She cried, trying to tickle his ribs in retaliation.
He kissed her hard until her body became soft and she surrendered to his touch. After a while he let her up, dusting sand from her although he was covered in it himself.
'Do you think it will hold for a swim?' She asked, fingering the flowers in her yellow flower crown.
Seeing his grimace, she added, 'You've got sand in your ears, only one thing for it now, really.' She nodded at the water, already undressing.
'Fine,' he conceded, shaking sand out of one shoe.
She made a canon ball into the black water with a loud whoop. 'It's wonderful once you're in,' she promised through chattering teeth once she emerged from the depths.
'You're a bad liar, Princess,' he drawled. 'But the flowers are holding.'
He carefully removed the other shoe and dipped his toes into the loch. 'It's freezing,' he complained.
'You're such a wuss,' she teased, drifting closer.
'I never claimed to be brave,' he said, sighing.
Bobbing up and down in the gentle swell, she said; 'Better to take off the robes, don't you think, Sev?'
He raised a brow, paused for effect, and then started unbuttoning the frock coat obediently. She drifted closer when his clothes were laid out neatly on the rock to dry in the sun. Severus slipped in carefully, drawing in a sharp breath at the water's cold sting.
When they both could no longer feel their feet, he carried her out and lay her down on the warm rock next to their discarded garments. He buried his head between her legs, having her like dessert with the shy sun warming his back. When she was satisfied, he held her close stroking her hair, his hardness pressing against her back. Severus dared not slate his own thirst. The witch was more important. She was fragile of late, despite her bravado. So he let her fall asleep against his chest, one hand cradling his cock.
They woke before the sunset and trailed back to the cave, Severus stopping to dig up roots for a stew and pluck a selection of mushrooms from rotting logs. He managed to put together bowls of boiled roots, watercress, mushrooms, young dandelion leaves, and rice. They huddled together to eat by the minute blue flame burning with the blazing strength of a hearth.
She mumbled appreciatively during every bite. Just as noisy an eater as she is a lover.
'So good,' Holly said for the second time.
He did not feel the need to reply, having an unfortunate natural immunity to compliments, but he did lift a corner of his lip for her. To show her he cared.
Everything felt right, they had the high ground. A misstep was certain death, yes, and death was likely, going about doing what they were. They were reckless in every sense of the word. Fornication. Fraud. Espionage. Treason. Murder. You name it, they were guilty of it all. Her carelessness drove him mad, however, once a few lines were crossed, he stopped counting sins and was swept away in the current. He'd simply laid down his nets like the first disciples when Jesus called them to follow him. She called, and he resisted at first, but eventually, he left his life in the past and followed this Chosen One.
Holly
Eat. Train. Sleep. Sex. The next few days ticked by like clockwork, efficiently and orderly. A schedule was drawn up and Severus enforced it on them both. He must be tired enough to be delusional, but he still stood watch at the entrance of the cave. His rigid black outline was chalked out against the purple of rising dawn. Holly stretched and yawned, sitting up in the bedroll. She watched his still, bat-like shape. He was brooding about Walpurgis, judging by the set of his jaw and the hardness of his gaze staring onto the grassy plains beyond the cave. When the first ray of sun filtered onto the sloped walls, Severus brought her a cup of black coffee with the milk boiled off the previous night's rice. She found she preferred it much lighter than this depraved cup of bitterness, but drank it anyway.
The drills she was subjected to were such that they could only have been invented by Severus Snape. Holly was forced to do without rest, and she struggled to keep from begging for mercy or breaks. He went ahead bullishly as ever. They started with spell work, worked on her Occlumecy shields, and ended with a duel.
Luckily, by the afternoon, rain forced them inside the tent where Severus all but corralled her into a steaming copper bath. Holly soaked for a long time, watching the light dance on the jagged ceiling as Severus sat by her side, combing rose primrose oil through her long, wet hair. When he was done, he twisted it into a complex knot on top of her head, not a single hair hanging in her face. He justified this hairstyle as "effective for dueling since it would not obscure your field of vision". She let him have this since he was getting rather good at the whole hair thing in a surprisingly short amount of time. Severus's own hair was overlong and hanging to his shoulder blades, but washed whenever hers was. He still shaved his carved jaw as meticulously as ever and, overall, had the colour of a much healthier man than before.
Maybe it's because he doesn't have the pressure of teaching — on top of keeping me alive and saving the wizarding world. She was used to him bearing the weight of the world on his shoulders, but not having to teach and spy proved to free him from some of his heavy burdens.
He took a turn in the chilling water and Holly made them tea dressed only in socks. She balanced his cup and saucer on the edge of the tub.
'Your hair's getting really long,' she twisted a thick black strand. 'I should be plaiting yours as well,' she said, playfully dividing his lanky hair into three rough sections.
Severus shrugged and lay his head back, 'If you must.' His black eyes closed. He looked much younger and though tired, lighter in spirit, at least as light as a doomed man dare seem. His cross was heavy to bear, as always.
Severus
'We seem to have prevailed,' Severus noted late afternoon. 'It's Walpurgis and nothing has happened. We're safe.'
'Looks like it,' she agreed, sighing. 'We sure are far away from HIM and his plans.'
'Show me your memory charms,' Severus said softly, rising to his feet.
Holly drew her wand and flowed through the stances and spells, her wand cutting through the air.
'Good. Ready yourself for Occlumency,' he slipped out his own wand and stepped back a few feet.
She nodded, frowning hard.
'Legillimens,' Severus penetrated her mind. She tossed up a few shields but was too panicked — too afraid of losing — and her grip on his intrusion slipped. Instead of cowering, she chose to react by overwhelming him with raw emotion. The wave of love she sent his way incapacitated him after a few moments. It was for him. She was using her love for him against him. He was swept away in it like a vessel in a thundering flood, drowning in its intensity. He wasn't sure where his feelings stopped and Holly's started. When did his shields break? Whose love was it? Did it matter? He'd never felt anything like it.
He'd underestimated her. She'd used his own spell turned against him as Holly invaded his mind in retaliation. Clumsy, like a bull in a wand shop, he tried to protect his memories with blind force. But it was like trying to catch a potion with a sieve.
Memories flickered like scenes from a movie: a young boy with long black hair, tears streaming down his face as a man with a hooked nose swore at a pale woman who desperately shielded herself from the impending blow. Memories kept hurtling by; now an eleven-year-old Severus eagerly opened Hogwarts letters alongside a spirited red-haired girl, before making a pinky promise with her. Then, James Potter cast Levicorpus on a much taller Severus, provoking a faint smile on Lily's lips as she witnessed his helplessness. Flash. Severus divulged what he had overheard during Trelawney's interview at the Hog's Head to Voldemort, accidentally resulting in the fate of James and Lily Potter being sealed. The Potions Master, in a moment of desperation, pleading at the feet of the Dark Lord, only to be met with a soft answer: 'You truly care for this witch, Severuss, I've not known you to have this… debility. How sstrange, that I have not seen it in your mind before. Very well, I shall offer her a chance to preserve her life and leave the girl to me.' Lily's lifeless form sprawled on the floor. Severus, his hands trembling clinging onto her cold body, overcome by the regret of a thousand worlds. Severus making a vow in Dumbledore's office to protect Holly.
Memories swirled chaotically as Holly retreated from his mind, leaving Severus doubled over, overwhelmed by the abruptness of her departure.
Severus
The witch stood stock still, like a hunted rabbit.
'You told Voldemort… about me—my prophecy?'
He flinched. 'I had no way to know it was about you. Or Lily! Please I—'
But… it was you, Sev. Out of everyone…' Her eyes welled up with tears, 'How could you?'
'I begged him to spare her,' Severus said desperately, cringing at the thought of her knowing his greatest shame.
Holly turned from him quickly, 'I have to think.' She walked away, slowly at first, then breaking into a jog.
'Holly—'
Then she ran for the hills, the waxed Walpurgis moon hanging faintly above the trees although the sky was still light with day. Severus followed her, but this time, the chase was no fun. He pursued, occasionally calling out to her in desperation.
NO!
She was too fast, slipping through branches and scrambling through holes in rocks and fallen trees he could not fit through. Before long, she was out of sight, and he could only hear her faintly as she broke through the underbrush of the forested hillside.
NO!
He broke through a low pine branch and skid to a halt behind her unmoving form. Four Snatchers stood in a circle around her, wands at the ready.
Walpurgis. Merlin, NO.
'There you are—' Severus said loudly, trying to hide how winded he was by the run. He jerked her closer by her arm.
Holly turned around, throwing a raw punch at Severus, a feral howl accompanying the swing. Her fist met his jaw with a horrible sound. The holly wand in her hand fractured on impact, bending at an awkward angle. She pulled back, sucking on her sore knuckles. Severus spit blood on the ground and placed a few fingers on his jaw, testing its movement. The snatchers were standing closer now, wands raised higher. Holly tried to straighten her wand in desperation, but the kink remained. She held it up defensively at the Snatchers anyway. The tension was thick enough to be cut with a knife.
Severus stepped forward, gripping Holly's arm again and pulling her back to him again. He slowly stepped back from the snatchers with her back pressed to his chest. She tried to pull away but he twisted her arm behind her back to keep her close. ' e,' He hissed through her hair, shaking out his wand to hold it to her temple. She clawed at him with her free hand, shrieking obscenities. The Snatchers closed in around Severus as the struggling witch. He recognised two as Fenrir and Scabior.
'Snape? Is that you?' A gruff voice asked.
Severus squinted at the massive wolfman, 'Surprised, Fenrir?' He answered smoothly, fighting to keep the slippery little witch in his grip.
'You're supposed to be dead. How come you're here?'
'— with the one and only Holly Potter at that,' Scabior said, scratching his chin with his wand.
'I'm on a mission. In the name of the Dark Lord.' He yanked Holly back against him, still dragging her back as the men advanced on them. 'And I just succeeded.'
'We found her first,' one of the strangers growled.
Severus took the wand from Holly and pointed it instead to the kingpin, Fenrir. 'And why do you think she just happened to be running right into your lot, hmmm? I pushed her here after smoking her out of her hideout.' He swallowed the blood pooling in his mouth.
It was a bold move, threatening their leader. Might just be the last mistake I make, Severus consoled himself bitterly.
The Snatchers looked at each other. One shrugged a shoulder. Severus clearly outranked them, even if he was supposed to be dead. Everyone knew of his reputation as the Dark Lord's Right Hand. Yet the strangers seemed like they were squaring him up for a duel.
Don't do it, he prayed, heart beating fast and sore. Holly whimpered in pain and he loosened his grip on her wrist.
'Let's take the Chosen One to the Dark Lord then. You first, Snape.'
Holly looked up, meeting Severus's eyes in horror and hate.