This is a Stargate SG-1/KHR cross.

"Just so we're clear here, the second we get home we're going to make their lives hell," said a young woman, though the way she was dressed you would easily mistake her for a slightly long-haired man.

The young woman was dressed in a shirt and trousers, with her hair pinned back and her modest bust hidden by a jacket. She wore an ornate ring on a chain around her neck, as she had been quick to hide it after they were captured. She had caramel-colored hair, amber-colored eyes and looked vaguely European with a mixture of Japanese origins.

"Oh abso-freaking-lutely!" said her companion.

He was dressed in rough military fatigues, with a camo bandanna holding back sunny blond hair and sharp blue eyes. His very aura screamed "military", and he held himself loosely. He had distinct European features and had all the hallmarks of a soldier in his prime.

He had chosen to join her in the 'experiment' partly out of boredom but mostly because he was in yet another rough patch with a woman he was slowly starting to fall out of love with, despite holding a massive crush for her for over thirty years. He had hoped that marrying her would resolve his feelings for her, but it had fallen through almost immediately.

Hence why he agreed to escort the young woman in the experiment. It was supposed to be a simple alteration to the annoyance that was the Ten Year Bazooka, and instead they ended up captured by freaking aliens and thrown into a holding cell for god knows what.

Needless to say both of them were going to have some rather strong words for the idiot trio of scientists that landed them in this situation.

The young woman was already plotting several ways to make their lives hell for the nest year and a half, or until they groveled enough that she could forgive them.

It had been a half year of payback originally, but after being captured she had bumped it up.

At least they weren't entirely helpless.

"So princess, what are you going to do to the trio of morons who got us into this situation?" he asked mock cheerfully.

"I was thinking of telling Mammon to audit their last five years along with a massive cut to their personal experiment budget. And then I was going to have Hibari and Mukuro 'test' their more sensitive experiments together," she replied darkly. "And that's to start with."

He smirked. Mammon was very nitpicky about budgets so sending them to audit the last five years was sure to be hell as they had to get through that before they were allowed to do anything. Sending the oil and water combination of the Mist and Cloud in to test their experiments at the same time was just cruel and unusual punishment... those two could barely stand to be in the same room together for more than five minutes without trying to kill each other. Or at least without causing several millions worth of property damage just to start with.

Those two caused more holes in the Iron Fort than half the Varia combined when they were in the same country for too long.

Seeing three new people thrown into the cell (two men and a woman, all wearing military fatigues), he nodded towards them.

"I see them. They don't look like the rest of these people... do you think..." she asked in Italian. The people here could barely understand English, much less Italian or Japanese.

"Yeah, they might be from our alternate Earth," he replied.

Which meant these people might be their best shot at getting home. If not now, then certainly later...because no one anticipated there would be multiple inhabitable worlds on this alternate universe.

Hayato was going to be thrilled to say the least when he found out.

He waited for the new people to notice him. He could already tell who was in command by the way he acted.

Sure enough, the second the older man saw what he was wearing he made a beeline right for him.

"Colonel Jack O'Neill, United States Air Force."

"Colonello, and this is my charge..." he said nodding to her.

"Kiseki Sawada, but everyone calls me Mira," she replied, though her English was slightly accented with her Japanese roots.

She was fluent enough to be understood, so Reborn had never really tried to train her accent out of her. Not that she would have had the time for it.

"How did you end up here?"

"A trio of idiot scientists were experimenting with something they probably shouldn't have, and we volunteered to test their new device out only to end up knocked out cold and then captured shortly after. When I get my hands on them I'm going to express my extreme displeasure with the fact they didn't bother to test it properly," said Mira annoyed. "Are you from Earth?"

Seeing the expression on his face, that was a yes.

"Chicago, actually."

"Milan," said Colonello cheerfully.

"A small town near Nagasaki," said Mira.

"So how did an Italian and a Japanese end up here?" he asked suspiciously.

"Again, idiot scientists who should have known better. Colonello actually volunteered to act as my escort since he had nothing better to do and because my friends would never allow me to go through a portal alone," said Mira.

"I bet you anything Giannini managed to look into what they were doing. That would definitely explain why we landed in the wrong area," said Colonello.

"If he did, then I am going to let him alter Hibari's tonfas and then give Hibari full permission to bite that idiot to death for it," said Mira flatly. "He should know better by now."

Mira and Colonello migrated over to the area where the other Earthlings were. After a quick round of introductions, they settled into a quiet night, with one of them keeping watch while the others rested. O'Neill seemed slightly relieved to have another military man with them, especially since Colonello admitted to being an excellent sniper and demolitions expert.

The blond had no issue following orders, since their goal was pretty obvious anyway. They had to return to Earth, alive and mostly undamaged.

A few hours later...

Mira was unashamed of the fact she used a rather clever application of Harmony to keep her and Colonello hidden. The idea of these...things...getting their slimy hands on someone with flames was enough to give her nightmares.

A good thing too...one of those aliens actually looked in their direction with interest before it was forced to dismiss her. Since she was 'in Harmony' with her surroundings, they were essentially invisible to them.

The second the 'lead' foot soldier turned on his comrades, Mira didn't think twice. She grabbed one of the staff weapons and tossed it to Colonello, before grabbing a second one. He didn't need any input from her, just a quick overview on how to operate the staff from Jack as they went through the hole the American made.

"Think this thing would work as well as a bo staff?" she joked with Colonello.

"Probably, though the weight might throw you off at first," he replied with a grin.

Now that they were out and armed, the tables had turned on the aliens. The only reason they had been caught in the first place was that A) they were still disoriented from the malfunctioning device, and B) because they had no idea they even were aliens until they went through the Stargate and one of their eyes glowed.

One demonstration of the advanced technology was enough to convince them to bide their time. It wasn't like the aliens would know how to counter Flames, much less something like Mira's X-Burner at full blast.

"I almost forgot to ask... was the date on your watch set correctly?" asked Colonello to Jack.

"Yeah, why?"

Colonello winced.

"Mira, I think you should set your old man on those idiot scientists," he said.

Mira blinked. It was something of an inside joke that Reborn was more of a father figure to her...despite being an absolute asshole and demonic tutor from hell...than Iemitsu was.

After the first time she called him Papa (with Iemitsu in the same room no less), the joke had stuck. Reborn, the tsundere that he was, had made her life a little worse for a month before he admitted he had already seen her as the daughter he never had, and they had settled into the relationship within a few days of her Harmonizing with him.

Mira gave him a long look.

"Do I want to know?"

"If Jack's watch is accurate, then we're stuck in the nineties," he said flatly.

"...You're right, those idiots could use a few months of having to deal with Reborn after them personally, if he hasn't already decided to make their lives hell."

Captain Carter, or Sam, looked at them both hearing that.

"What's the issue with the date?"

"Let me put it this way... where we come from, dial-up internet has long been replaced with wireless internet and computer monitors are much smaller and easier to haul around. How much memory does the standard PC have on Earth?" she asked.

"About two hundred gigabytes, at the most, and that's for military computers," said Sam without hesitation.

Colonello groaned.

"Dammit, I hate the nineties," he said.

"Don't worry...my hammer space has technology on our level, and with any luck we can get them up to speed a bit faster so we can contact the others."

"God I hope so, I really do," said Colonello. "Dial-up internet sucked so much..."

To say the Americans were confused was an understatement.

Still, they were able to get through the Stargate back to Earth, despite a few...complications on the way.

Sam was looking at Mira's phone with fascination.

"You're saying this is the level of technology on your planet?"

"To be fair, we come from an alternate Earth that's at least two decades ahead of yours. This is what's known as a smart phone, and yes I do have an extra you can play around with. It's far more versitile and is essentially a small computer compared to the bulky flip-phones you use now," said Mira.

Since they weren't from another planet, Mira and Colonello were basically stuck on base. Most of the people from Chuulak had already been sent home to where they had been taken from, courtesy of help from Teal'c.

"Here...this is a standard thumb drive I haven't bothered to load anything on. It uses the same USB ports as your computers and it holds a few gigs of memory, which is superior to the...floppy drives... you currently use."

Mira had made herself indispensible to the base simply through the 'advanced technology' she was more than happy to share.

Mostly because it was something they would have developed in a couple of decades anyway. She was just shaving time off of what was possible technology-wise. There wasn't much harm in letting them have a few spares she always carried around, because she had learned in her first year as Vongola Decimo that leaving your laptop out in the Iron Fort was just asking for Reborn or someone else to hack it and leave all sorts of annoying surprises.

Constant Vigilance and all that.

She mastered the use of "mist pockets" or as Spanner liked to call it, Hammer Space, in record time. It made carrying things securely that much easier and it was a rather simple trick once you had the hang of it.

Colonello fit right in with the soldiers...after all, he was a former soldier and it was only because of his Flames that he hadn't discreetly re-enlisted in the first place.

Since he had declared Mira his 'charge', they were given a shared room and the two had settled into a sort of arrangement within the first few days. It wasn't like they could just walk off the base and rent an apartment, so until things settled down they were stuck living inside the mountain.

They had the same restricted access Daniel Jackson had, at least until their own people managed to find them. As far as the Pentagon was concerned, they were 'civilian consults'.

Mira and Colonello wisely did not mention that they were part of the mafia in their world.

"So what does the ring around your neck mean?" asked Sam, trying to make small talk.

Mira blinked, before she realized what Sam meant.

"It's to symbolize the fact I'm the head of the family," she replied. "It belonged to my great-great-great grandfather who founded it, and it's been passed down to nine others before me. Normally I wouldn't have been considered for the position, but the three others before me were killed and the fourth was deemed ineligible due to certain reasons."

All true without giving up too much detail.

"Must be tough," said Sam.

Mira wanted to weep.

"You have no idea. I have to keep a bunch of idiots who think it's perfectly acceptable to throw explosives around for petty arguments or out of general boredom, idiot scientists who can't seem to understand the concept of keeping their damn labs intact is important or to remember important things like sleeping and eating regularly, and two battle-happy morons who can't stand the sight of each other that destroy walls regularly!" said Mira exasperated. "I think the worst part is the paperwork... I still can't look at the number of zeros on the bill without wanting to cry."

Sam stared at her.

"Let me put it this way... testing that device was my way of getting a vacation without them trying to drag me back in order to chain me to my desk for days on end just to clean up after them. We were only supposed to be gone a week at most," said Mira.