The Joining

Morrigan had been wary about Cobian's run of questions at first (about the ruins, the Kocari Wilds, Flemeth, all sorts of things really), but after a while she seemed to enjoy them. The pair spoke the entire trip back, Cobian writing furiously in his notes, a gleam in his eyes. Oddly enough, Morrigan seemed disappointed when they finally reached Ostagar's gates. Meanwhile Lawrien clung to Alistair's back, looking completely, and utterly fed up.

"I think you lost something," Alistair said to Ciara, who had been waiting for them at the gates.

Ciara blinked, but otherwise didn't seem at all bothered when Alistair struggled to get Lawrien off his back and dump her at Ciara's feet. Lawrien looked gleeful, and quickly crawled away, sniggering.

"She stole your money," Ciara sighed.

Alistair froze. "What?" He frantically searched his pockets. "Lawrien!" He raced after her.

Ciara watched Morrigan leave them, raising a brow. She seemed to dismiss her though, and smiled at the rest of them instead.

"Good to see you're back. The others told me you were off to collect the scrolls," Ciara said. She indicated them to follow with a jerk of her head. "The Joining is ready to undertake. Epona has already gone through it, but the others offered to wait on the rest of you."

"How is she?" Faren asked.

"Resting right now." Ciara led them straight back to Duncan who stared gravely into the fire, his eyes growing slowly hard. Torph and Daveth were enjoying the fire, tucking into a bowl of stew, although Torph was poking at some of the vegetables.

"Welcome back," Duncan greeted them softly. "Did you manage to get the scrolls?"

"Yeah, although we met a witch," Narascha said.

"Wait, they're real?" Torph choked.

"I told you!" Daveth cried.

"I thought you were just fucking crazy."

"He is." Faren smiled fondly.

"Mean," Daveth snorted.

Duncan sighed. "Never mind the witch, or witches, or whomever. Where are the scrolls?"

Cobian paused. "Oh, I handed them to Alistair. But he's chasing Lawrien right now."

"Stole his money?" Duncan asked dryly.

"Right on point." Ciara smiled.

"Well I'll get them later. Right now we have important business to attend to."

"True," Ser Jory agreed. "I've been curious about this Joining."

"Ciara, can you escort the recruits to the Joining? I'll be along shortly with Alistair."

Why did this sound so terrifying? Oh, right, his Uncle said about him dying... That certainly made this Joining business sound sketchy.

.::.

"The more I hear about this Joining the less I like it!" Jory paced, running a hand through his hair. "Haven't we proven ourselves already? Why all these tests?"

"Maybe it's tradition." Daveth smirked. "Or maybe they're just trying to annoy you."

Daveth sat against a wall, Faren leaning against his side, fiddling with a dagger. Torph joined Narascha who looked deep in thought, staring out into the wilderness. He sat down by her side, but she didn't pay him any mind this time.

"The Joining has the capability to make you all Grey Wardens. It isn't something we put our recruits through lightly," Ciara said. She stood at the centre of them all, right in the line of questioning.

Ser Jory grimaced, but slowed to a stop before her. "I just don't like the idea of an enemy I cannot engage with my blade."

"Sometimes we gotta do things we don't like," Daveth pointed out.

"All I know if that my wife is in Highever due to give birth any day now. If I had been told how difficult this process was going to be I would have held off-"

"We're Grey Wardens, Ser Jory, we live to fight the darkspawn and protect the greater good," Ciara sighed. "It was always going to be a difficult process."

Yeah, that was true. What worried Torph though was that Alistair was standing in the shadows, way out of the way, as if trying to distance himself. And Lawrien? Lawrien was long gone. This crap was going to get nasty as fuck.

Narascha met his eyes, and she looked just as strained as he felt. That was when Duncan arrived, withdrawn. His eyes were no longer warm or amused and Torph felt a cold chill rush down the back of his neck. That was the Grey Warden Commander.

"At last we've come to the Joining." Duncan held a large, silver chalice but Torph couldn't see what was in it, being too damn short. He scowled at that. "The Grey Wardens were founded during the First Blight when humanity stood of the verge of annihilation. So it was when the first Grey Wardens drank the blood of their enemies and mastered the Taint."

It all went silent for a moment. Torph swore he could feel his hear his own heart beating it was so quiet. Narascha leapt to her feet, horrified. "But it's poisonous! Many dwarven warriors have fallen to their blood alone!"

Torph blanched. It wasn't a joke? They were going to actually drink darkspawn blood? That was disgusting!

"Y'know, it really doesn't sound healthy." He agreed with the Princess. A nasty shock that was too, having something to agree on.

Ser Jory's face had gone white. "We're going to drink the blood..." He shuddered. "Of those creatures? Poisonous blood?"

"Oh!" Cobian gasped, rushing over to inspect the blood. "Darkspawn blood poisonous. But if you've added in a cure or some kind of agency that would boost our immune systems. No, darkspawn blood very dangerous, doesn't have a cure. Otherwise would be available to everyone. Unless cure creation ingredients very rare. But no. Subjects are usually random when in the recovery stages. Oh, very interesting-" He reached for the cup to dip his finger in, but Duncan moved it from him.

"Calm down, Cobian," Duncan sighed.

"So many possibilities. I must write notes!" Cobian dug into his pack, pulling out his scroll. "I have so many research subjects."

"I guess he's going last then," Ciara said dryly.

"What is wrong with you?" Torph shook his head.

Cobian blinked. "Shall I give you a list in alphabetical order or list from highest to lowest in priority?"

"Huh?" Torph blinked. "Dammit, Noble, I barely understood half of that."

"You shall drink the blood of the darkspawn just as the first Grey Wardens did, and we have before you," Duncan said, his voice eerily calm and cold, as if he was distancing himself from the situation.

Nope, Torph didn't like this. This fucking sucked!

"Uh, can I not be first?" Faren asked quietly.

Fucking elves. Wait, the angry elf, she survived. That meant they all had a good chance right? She looked dead on her feet sometimes, so maybe things would go well?

"Those who survive the Joining become immune to the Taint," Alistair finally spoke up, a grim look on his face. "We can sense the Darkspawn and fight back with that ability at hand."

"Those who survive?" Faren winced.

"Not all who drink the blood always make it." Ciara shrugged, as if it was a light-hearted situation. "We aren't sure what the reasons are for those who fall and those who live. Epona lived, but she has been carrying the Taint for quite some time as well."

"So this is a random process of elimination?" Ser Jory cried out.

"No. You were all picked because of all show the most skill and potential to survive," Duncan said firmly. "Let me be clear. I do not just pick whoever I can to undertake this task, only the best."

They were so dead. Fucking hell, they were so dead!

Torph paused when Narascha straightened up, eyes growing determined. He caught her hand when she stepped forward, and shook his head. "Princess-"

She squeezed his hand, and smiled. "The darkspawn have had enough of our fear, and if this gives me the means to fight them again, then I shall."

"We could die."

"Yes, but that could happen any day of the week. You survived the tournament that would have seen you torn apart by the warrior caste. I survived my brother's betrayal. Faren survived that disgusting human, and Epona survived the taint." Narascha's smile grew. "I believe we can survive this trial too."

"You're insane." Torph shook his head. "Fuck. Fine. You bitch."

Narascha chuckled.

"We only speak a few words during the Joining." Duncan glanced at Alistair. "Alistair, if you would?"

Alistair lowered his head, as if he was either praying or unable to look any of them in the eyes anymore. "Join us, brothers and sisters. Join us in the shadows where we stand vigilant."

Faren stood up and his hand latched around Daveth's. Daveth gripped it back, a wordless communication passed between the pair of them when their eyes met.

"Join us as we carry out the duty that cannot be forsworn."

Cobian shifted uneasily, but he clutched his notebook tight. It was open, on a blank page with only one thing written at the top. He couldn't read it though. Torph snorted. He didn't really know how to read to be honest.

"And should you perish, know that your sacrifice will not be forgotten. And that one day, we shall join you."

Duncan eyed them all up but he paused when Narascha stepped forward, bowing her head. Of course, of course she'd go first, the bloody maniac! She was brave and stupid. By the Ancestors she was way too fucking brave and stupid!

"Allow me to go first, Duncan." Narascha held her hand out for the chalice.

He nodded and handed her it carefully. Narascha took a hold of it, taking a deep breath. No, not like this. Not in this damn silence.

"So," Torph began, struggling to think of something, but thankfully his tongue did not fail him. "If you choke and die does this mean I get to sell your stuff?"

Narascha scowled. "I'm going to live just to spite you. You do realise that right?"

"Don't be mean. Your coin could keep my belly full." Torph smirked.

She rolled her eyes at that but her shoulders visibly relaxed. "Ancestors guide me," she murmured.

Narascha took a drink and handed the chalice back. Torph flinched when she gasped, stumbling back. Her eyes opened, pure white and unseeing, before they dropped shut and she collapsed. Duncan caught her and moved her aside, laying her down carefully with a small, relieved smile.

"She made it."

"Damn," Torph huffed.

Thank the Ancestors, even if they had never done him any favours. Nah, actually, no, not those old bastards. Thank fuck for Narascha and her inhuman strength. Most people didn't survive being betrayed by their brother, being tossed into the Deep Roads, and then apparently a Joining.

The lucky bitch.

Duncan eyed them all once more before his gaze landed on Daveth who nodded back, letting go of Faren's hand. "Daveth, step forward."

Daveth patted Faren on the shoulder who nodded, smiling weakly as the human stood with his back straight and proud in front of the Commander. Daveth took the chalice and drank from it, handing it back to Duncan who stepped away, Alistair frowning from the side.

A choked cry escaped Daveth. He thrashed violently, clawing at his throat, then hit the ground hard. Faren yelled, leaping forward, but Alistair caught him. Torph choked on bile, it climbed up his throat, burning it, but it was nothing compared to this.

"Daveth!" Faren cried then turned on Alistair, clawing at him. "Let me go. Let me go to him!"

"Sorry!" Alistair apologised, dragging Faren's wrists down, his face clearly torn. "I'm so sorry."

Ciara was there the next second, in one smooth motion her dagger pierced Daveth's heart, cutting off the choked sobs. He went limp in Ciara's arms, who laid him down gently. Faren let out a wretched sob, and Alistair's grip tightened momentarily on him before carefully releasing him. Faren bolted right to Daveth's side, wiping away the blood from Daveth's face and closing his open eyes with shaky hands. Torph looked away, meeting Duncan's gaze who stared down at Daveth and Faren solemnly.

"I'm sorry, Daveth," Duncan apologised, his voice still cold though, as if he was trying to push away all his feelings. Fucking hell. Why? How could he push this all away? This was horrible! Cobian wasn't even writing in his notebook, he stared at Daveth and Faren, and clutched the notebook tighter.

He had no idea what was so special about that notebook, but Cobian was clinging to it like it was a lifeline.

.::.

Cobian brushed his thumb over the single line written on the page of the notebook. Roderick Gilmore. He'd live. Cobian would live and become a Grey Warden for Roderick's sake. He'd live. He'd live. He'd live. For his mother and father, for Fergus for Uncle Loghain and Cailan and Anora and Nan and Oren.

By the Maker he had to live.

Duncan looked so distant, but it made sense for him to be so. He must have done this so many times and each time must have hurt him. Cobian couldn't imagine bringing a hopeful recruit into the ranks, only for them to die violently before they even became a proper Grey Warden. It must be horrible.

Ciara knelt by Faren's side and began to speak quietly to him as Duncan's gaze met Ser Jory's. Ser Jory was pure white, his eyes wide with absolute terror and disgust. He stared at Daveth and Faren, terrified before his eyes flew up to Duncan's, before landing on the chalice.

"Ser Jory, step forward," Duncan called but Ser Jory backed away, shaking his head.

"B-But... I-I have a wife! A-A child! I-If I had known..." Ser Jory whimpered.

Duncan began to move towards him. "There is no turning back."

"Um, Ser Jory is clearly stressed. Perhaps someone else go first?" Cobian said anxiously. "Maybe me?"

But Ser Jory drew his sword and Cobian's heart hammered when Duncan's eyes grew even colder. Cobian shivered, chilled to the bone and Torph looked as horrified as himself. Faren wasn't even looking at them.

"You ask too much!" Ser Jory yelled. "There is no glory in this!"

"You idiot. He's the Commander for fuck sake!" Torph snapped. "He'll pull out your spine and beat ya to death with it!"

Cobian paused at that. That was a creative description. Alistair looked just as curious as Cobian felt on that comment too. That was the moment Ser Jory was cut down. Cobian had barely any time to follow, Ser Jory managed to block a blow or two before he was cut down, quick and probably painlessly. The chalice hadn't been once spilled much to Cobian's shock, not even after the sudden movement.

"Well shit..." Torph summarised the situation perfectly.

"The Joining is not yet complete," Duncan said, his eyes searching.

Faren stood up, a cold look on his face. "Then it's my turn. I'll either join Daveth in death or you'll get a new Grey Warden."

"I hope you live, and not only because I'm terrified of your uncle," Ciara said lightly.

Faren's eyes grew hard at that. "Yeah, you might want to be worried about that if I die." He took the chalice and drank. Faren quickly passed it back, and knelt down beside Daveth to hold his hand.

Faren twitched, gasping. Just like Narascha, his eyes turned white, and he dropped to the ground a second later. Ciara braced him, laying him down carefully by Daveth's side.

"I suspected he would survive it. He's just like his mother," Duncan murmured before he turned to face him and Torph. "Step forward, Torph."

"Ah crap," Torph sighed as he reluctantly made his way over. "If I die I swear I'll become a ghost and haunt you all. I'll screw you three and Narascha over big time."

"Narascha too?" Ciara smirked.

"Have to get her too don't I?" Torph shrugged, grabbing the chalice and taking a drink. He handed it back before closing his eyes, tensing up completely. Torph bit his lip and shook for a moment before his whole body loosened up, relaxing completely as he dropped.

Alistair caught him, lifting him up and laying him down out the way, closer to where Narascha lay. Alistair looked relieved. "He's alive too."

"Quite a few survivors so far hm? That's good," Ciara mused but then all their eyes met his. "Is this really a good idea? He's a Cousland. If this kills him-"

"Then I shall deal with the consequences," Duncan said stiffly.

"Even if that means from the King and Teyrn Loghain?"

"Yes." Duncan approached him and Cobian held out his hands, taking the chalice into his own. "You are called upon to submit yourself to the Taint, for the greater good," Duncan continued the last of his speech as Cobian drank.

He handed the chalice back and strengthened his resolve, he debated if he should pray, but who to? The Maker was silent, but maybe Andraste? She had more history in Ferelden, Cobian believed in her. Believed her story was true, in some places perhaps.

He saw a dragon, roaring loudly and a beautiful song filled his ears, a song he desperately wanted to follow. It was enchanting indeed.

But why? Was it to do with the new blood in his body or was it perhaps some kind of enchantment that the mages created? Could the dragon possibly have cast it? Was it a magical being?

.::.

Ciara watched as her fellow Wardens, Senior Wardens, arrived. Each of them bared their new Warden comrades in their arms. Alistair carefully unlocked Faren's hand from Daveth's, scooped up Faren, and carried him away. Duncan dismissed Alexor, the old warrior who had went to pick up Cobian.

"The King wishes for Lord Cousland to be returned to his tent. Help the others care for Daveth and Ser Jory. Have them burned," Duncan ordered, setting the chalice on the table before going to pick up Cobian.

"Two more deaths. Well, it wasn't so bad considering how many recruits you gathered," Ciara mused. "A shame Ser Jory's fear won over him though."

"I had more hope but unfortunately it wasn't meant to be," Duncan agreed, looking so much more tired than he ever had before. "I think this will be my final batch of recruits, Ciara."

Ciara winced at that. "So, the time has come then?"

"Unfortunately. I will stay for the Blight but afterwards..."

"Depending on how long it lasts there maybe no afterwards for you, but I understand what you mean," Ciara sighed. "Have you told Lawrien?"

"She knew the moment I did." Duncan smiled weakly. "She came to my room and held my hand through the nightmare. I awoke to her staring down at me, with that fire in her eyes."

Ciara shifted, recalling the memory. "Yes, she's rather upset about that. She came to me afterwards."

"And now you'll be going to her?" Duncan suggested and Ciara smirked.

"Of course," Ciara chuckled, turning away to the main camp. She knew where the other Wardens were staying, probably all getting drunk with the soldiers or in preparation. Lawrien would have went there to keep her empathic abilities far away from the Joining.

The one and only time she had been close enough for a Joining was a mistake nobody would make ever again. The breakdown Lawrien had afterwards had been messy, as in the entire training quarters for the Grey Wardens had gotten rebuilt.