"He was telling the truth: it wasn't him." Loki told his partner.
"Really? And who told you that, his snake?"
"As a matter of fact, she did. Contrary to common belief, snakes are remarkably honest creatures, as are most other animals. They're incapable of lying, and that man's snake, Marmor, told me that he really did take her to the vet Saturday afternoon. She apparently got a terrible case of indigestion after swallowing a cantaloupe whole."
"And that tongue flicking thing- you could really understand what she was saying?"
"Indeed. Snakes don't speak to each other audibly, like you and I, but through tongue movements and their olfactory senses. I learned to speak their language during my youth, before I had mastered the art of shapeshifting, so I could converse with some of the animals and other creatures I would transform into, as well as fool anyone I felt in the mood to prank."
"But not alligator?"
"No: I never thought of becoming an alligator until I met my variants. But snakes, many times!"
"Oh yeah, I think I remember that now. Heh, I should have pegged you for a Slytherin!"
Loki chuckled. "'A-slitherin'?!' For pity's sake, Mobius, you're getting more down-home by the minute! And just where am I 'a-slitherin' off to!?" He mocked, emphasizing "a-slitherin'" in an impressive imitation of Mobius's voice.
"That's not what I said- Slytherin House: it's a Harry Potter reference!" Mobius corrected.
Loki slowed to a stop and gave Mobius a puzzled look. "Did I miss something? I don't see how a hairy pottery-maker correlates in any way with serpents or shapeshifting?"
"No, no, he's a young wizard from a 2001 movie that talked with snakes, but we're getting off topic. What else did the serpent tell you?"
"She said to ask her friend, Mr. Slitherpuss, who lives in that house over yonder, with the gray roof. He's supposedly very knowledgeable about the goings-on throughout the village and possibly knows the whereabouts of Jörmungandr himself."
"'Mr. Slitherpuss?'" Mobius repeated mockingly.
"I don't name them, I'm merely the translator." Loki responded, half defensively yet half amused.
They quickly reached their next stop, knocking on the door and announcing themselves, but there was no answer. They knocked again and waited for about 30 more seconds.
"Must not be home. Should we wait? Maybe have a stakeout?"
"Well, how about we grab a bite while we wait: there's one key item that all crime-solving officials need when they're working on a big case." Mobius stopped and motioned to a bakery down the street on their right. "Donuts."
The scent of fresh pastries coming from the aforementioned building was so strong that Mobius's stomach started growling.
"Yes, it certainly doesn't take a detective to understand your motives." Loki teased. "Very well."
The detective duo entered the bakery, eyeing rows of cinnamon rolls, danishes, fruit tarts, and more. Mobius and Loki each decided on a chocolate covered cinnamon roll, while Loki got himself a strawberry danish and a raspberry tart, as well as a whole assortment to bring back to Sylvie.
"So, 'The Midgard Serpent…' what's your scaly friend doing here on Earth in the first place?" Mobius wondered in between his chewing. "Is he from here, or did he travel from another realm."
Loki swallowed the last bite of his roll and answered. "He definitely isn't from here, despite his moniker. He was actually my pet when I was just a boy. I was very fond of him and took excellent care of him. …He was almost like a son to me. We got into all sorts of mischief together: harmless mischief, mind you. Then one day, when Thor was being particularly obnoxious, Jörmungandr thought it would be funny to swallow him whole. It was, in my opinion, but no one else thought so, especially not Odin."
"Heheh, yeah, I'll bet!"
"Odin was so upset, he banished the serpent immediately to Midgard and forbid me from seeking him out! Personally, I think he harshly overreacted, but this is Odin we're speaking of. I was devastated: I feared I would never see him again." Loki smiled warmly. "I'm glad I have the chance to see him again after all this time!"
Mobius began to nod. "Yeah, but I… I just hope I don't remind him of Thor!"
Loki quietly chuckled. "Don't worry, Mobius, I can handle him." The two turned around to leave until Mobius noticed something at another table.
"Hey, is that a book on Norse mythology you're reading there, kid?"
Loki peered at the book the young teen girl with long, reddish-blonde hair was reading: the title read "Loki and His Children" and featured a grossly inaccurate drawing of him underneath. Loki shook his head. "Whoever writes these can never get my nose right!" He muttered to himself.
"Yeah." The girl glanced at each of them for a second and went back to reading.
"You're a fellow Loki fan, I take it." Loki remarked, he and Mobius sitting back down at their own table. "He's much more handsome in person than he is in that illustration, to say the least!"
"I know, right?! Did you see him in Germany or New York? I saw a picture of him with his army on the news! He's magnificent!" Her green eyes sparkled as she pictured the memory, not realizing the man she idolized was right across from her table.
"I'm sure a great many people here share your opinion of him, since their ancestors were some of the first people on Earth lucky enough to meet him." Loki goaded.
"Well, some of them. A lot of them prefer Thor. But he's kinda boring in my opinion. Too stiff, kinda dumb. Too much of a stereotypical muscle man."
"Exactly. Loki's the fun god, the mischievous scamp. He's quite misunderstood, in my opinion!"
"Yeah, yeah. Like that Nielsen lady on the other side of the village: she said some really disrespectful crap about Loki, and it looks like she's gotten payback."
"Really? What did she say?" Mobius pressed.
"Well, me and my fan club were spreading word about how much we'd love to have him rule over Denmark or Scandinavia, and she got all mad saying, 'Loki's just an evil monster, and he's an embarrassment to Thor and his family, and he's not welcome here or anywhere on Earth, and blah blah blah!' Just rude!"
"That's extremely rude!" Loki nodded his head, not hiding his offended feelings.
"And it's not true at all! Though it sounds like the perfect motivation for a little mischief!" Mobius added. "Like an all-over art project all around her house?"
The teen turned to Mobius. "Whoever did that, they must be on my side!"
"But not on ours." Loki stated. "It seems 'whoever did that' is also responsible for the mysterious disappearance of an entire squadron of police officers, with no clue yet if they're alive or dead! And on top of that, Ms. Nielsen herself received a threatening message, and despite her poor taste in men and animals, she hasn't committed a crime punishable by death! This is Agent M, I am Agent L, and we're detectives working this case. Be assured, we will find whoever's behind these crimes and bring them to justice: never once have the two of us lost a case!"
While Mobius did his best not to wince at Loki's hair-splitting boasting, he suddenly knocked a piece of silverware off the table. "Crap." He ducked under the table as Loki continued the conversation.
"I can see you acquired that book from your village library: could you point me in the direction of it?"
"Yeah, it's way over in that direction!"
"Thanks!" Mobius popped back up and Loki stood again. "Hey, as long as we've got a bit of time to kill, why don't we check out one or two of those Loki books ourselves, do some research?"
"That ought to be an interesting read." Mobius snarked.
"And who knows? Maybe we'll find some information that'll help us on our case as well: you never know all the things you can find in a library!" Loki hinted.
"Well, it's been nice talking to you, kid."
"Yes, a pleasure to meet you, Miss…"
"Røskva." The girl replied. "Good luck on the case, you guys!"
They nodded and left the bakery, following the directions the young Loki fan gave them.
"It was her." Mobius stated. "The written message: 'One more word about him and you're next.' The 'him' is obviously you, and when I reached under my table to grab the silverware, I noticed her shoes had flat indentations in the soles, most likely from climbing up roof tiles."
"Yes, I suspected her fan club was involved, but she's a child!"
"So are you!"
"I'm not-"
"Compared to me, you are. And in Asgardian years, you're what, 17? And you almost blew up an entire realm all by yourself."
"Well, I suppose. The facts do add up."
"So, do you have an idea related to our case that involves the library, Loki, or are you just curious to see what kind of crazy fanfictions the humans wrote about you?"
"Both, if we have the time. And who wouldn't want to write stories about me?" Loki immodestly pondered. "But I definitely do have an idea!"