When the blazing sun is gone,
When he nothing shines upon,
Then you show your little light,
Twinkle, twinkle all the night.
Chapter 9:
Lost One's Weeping.
"Do you have your report?"
"Never leave home without it."
Eyebrows furrowed. "... Dark humor doesn't suit you. Don't forget to turn it in or-"
"I know, I know-" The machine beeped. "Who's the jackass that keeps locking out the servers?"
"-regardless of their studied professions, not all interns are adept at operating facility equipment. And please keep your colorful language to a minimum during work hours-"
"-which is always." A witty remark.
"-we wouldn't want the Genomorphs picking it up-"
The clone under her charge grunted.
"Well, excuse me, your majesty." He replied in what she interpreted as a sorry-not-sorry tone.
"You don't mind, do you?" He asked, turning his attention to her.
Red eyes caught his blue ones.
Blinking slowly, the Genomorph shook her head.
"See?"
Dr. Spence broke her professionalism and groaned at his pithy observation.
As always…
Bob watched.
- / ত / ত / ত / ত /-
('Humans desire peace yet bear arms to attain it. They pursue freedom at others' expense. Save to circumvent killing, kill to save millions. Heinous acts for the benefit of life… Heroes, villains. Good or bad. The world is complex.'
'Dude,' I stared at the empty space. 'I just asked for your favorite color.'
'I see. From what I have gathered from your hippocampus… neocortex… and amygdala, I would say…'
There was an infinitesimal pause on his part. I could hear a fizzle in our connection before he replied.
'Midnight blue.' Then his words ceased.
I would've pestered him about why he was snooping around my memories. However-
HiPpocAMpus, formationofnewmemories about experience events and declarativeMemorywith sensorydeTAils. AMydGala, following an event influencesthesTrength of the subsequent memory by eMotioNal-
-I don't know how in the hell I knew that, or how information was vomited into my brain.
I tossed all of those questions out the window because of one thing I perceived about Dubbilex.
His tone sounded the same, but why…?
Why did I sense it was somehow off?
'Look.' I rubbed my nubs against my head and sighed.
'I won't lie to you. The world's fucked up. It's messy and broken and truly all kinds of shit. In spite of that…'
There we stood in silence, watching with little to no clouds veiling the makeshift sky. Its blue hues appearing purer, and the sky itself, more open and vast.
A capricious and clear autumn sky. The end of a growing season.
'There is beauty in a broken world. Don't you think?')
･ﾟﾟ･:｡.｡:ུ۪: ｡.｡ *･ﾟﾟ･
I can hear the inhaling and exhaling process my body undergoes. Deep and fresh as I immerse myself in my world. The strength in my legs with every step taken, how heavy they sound as dirt and grains tug between my shoeless toes. And although it's unnecessary, my eyes flutter open. Wide and evident to witness how far the abundant grove stretched out before me.
Bumping into one of the many creations in my path, I plucked roundish fruit from a sapling bearing thin red skin and crisp flesh. They buried roots deeply underground to store and absorb water and protect their labor from the heat above them.
'Apples, huh?' I made my thoughts known, noticing that my voice was somehow distinct from when I first conversed with Dubbilex. Brisk.
I couldn't help but bust out a tune.
'Apples are food,~' I fiddled with the hardened yet squishy texture in my grip, not needing to see the juices pouring out of a single bite. 'Apples are yummy.~'
The sun stayed steady and the line in my mouth curved upwards. My expression finally changed the way I wanted it to.
'Into the mouth,~' I pointed to my face where my lips were broadly open. I wiped off the reddish peels lingering there and patted the center of my body, jiggling it slightly. 'Down to the tummy!~'
"UUu-uuuu-UuU!~" A succession of high pitches in rhythm and off-key notes warbled.
I wasn't about to refute Othe's singing, so I kept rendering the melody of a bygone childhood of magic, a round-eared mouse, and cassette tapes.
'Mm-mmm-mm, I like food!~'
"uuuu-UU-uuu.~"
Setting him on my shoulder, I climbed the tree, feeling the firm woody branches. They creaked as my hands brushed their lobed leaves and ripe fruits.
'Yummy, yummy food.~'
"UuuuuUUU!~"
I reached the top where the bark creaked most and sat upon the branches. My jaws finished the apple to the last drop as we stayed still. At peace.
It's scary to see how the mind works.
And how easily it can imprison your views of reality. If I didn't know better, I'd expect I was actually picking fruit on a farm.
Just Othe and me.
A ray of sun and an unfortunate human.
Water trickles down my face.
Some consider crying to be a sign of weakness.
To that, I say: total bull.
I emphasized the role of crying as a mechanism that allows us to release stress and emotional pain. Crying is a crucial valve, largely because keeping difficult feelings inside—random info floating around my head calls it RepreSSIon coPing—can be problematic for our health.
Everybody feels sad, stressed, scared, and frustrated at times. I guess what I'm struggling through is similar to any stay-at-home person, but nobody can grasp my current situation, my misery, and my overwhelming days. How can they?
Having no fucking shape until now has eaten me up inside.
We have all broken down, some more than others. It's a natural part of life.
We need never be ashamed of our tears - Thank you, Charles Dickens. I couldn't have said it any better.
So yeah, I wasn't crying.
'BWAAAAAAH!'
I was bawling my eyes like there was no tomorrow and making excuses for doing so. And the literal ball of sunshine was fretting because of it.
'Just got something in my eyes, that's all.' I sniffed, trying to calm him down as he rubbed against my cheeks. Warm and bright.
There's no greater nobility than to offer one's shoulders and dry one's friend's weeping tears.
You're such an awesome pal, Othe.
I won't admit that out loud, though.
The last time I cried was because I laughed too hard during my days of no inner body. I had learned from the Outside about an Alex going to arrive with some Clair, who I think was his date.
Him? Her? Ugh. That name is adopted by all genders, so I'm left in the dark regarding that topic, but who's crazy enough to bring their date here?
Maybe he should research how to grow hair instead, as another worker mentioned.
"uuU u?"
I smiled wobbly as Othe chimed in.
The peace is ruined by the reminder that, for the life of me, no matter how much I crammed into his mindscape, sentences were the one thing that didn't stick.
Impressions? Sure.
Colors? I got you covered, but words?
Oh, boy.
Likewise, numbers are out of the picture, and animals… by the gods. He can't tell the difference between a bird and a fish. Othe merely follows them around which, while cute, isn't helping. (I don't know how he can pull off looking like a curious little puppy.)
Don't get me started on the other stuff.
Although, it's amusing to note how his speech resembled the grunts of the garbled sounds
I've added it to the ongoing list I had and so far, I've categorized 25 different "grunts" that might not be grunts after all. Well, would you look at that!
Or maybe I'm getting ahead of myself and they are, indeed, simply grunts. Still, something to consider. At least nursery songs and idyllic scenes get a reaction from him, even if it's only because they're interesting.
All I know is that, even if he doesn't realize what they are, he enjoys them.
I will not force him to understand. Everybody has their own pacing.
Whoever tries to help a butterfly out of its cocoon kills it. To help a sprout out of the seed destroys it. To awaken a consciousness in someone who is not ready confuses them. There are certain things that can't be helped, they must occur from the inside out.
So, while he's mellowed and unconsciously in touch with my emotions, I will endeavor not to figuratively and literally tear my hair out whenever he hovers near the images I conjure up to add to my storytelling.
It seems Dubbilex isn't the only one that finds utter enjoyment in fairy tales and fiction… but did Othe have to twinkle and circle the Superman projection? What's up with these people and their obsession with capes and tights?! Curse you, DC!
Wait.
Now that I think about it, who else did I bring up?
Captain America, Breath of the Wild Link, Saber, Finn the Hero, Dorothy, Artoria and Sif…
Okay, I regret rambling about that particular story. This is because once I explained their tragedy; I exploded into tears again, and it made Othe cry even if he didn't understand why, and then we were both left in a sobbing pile. So, I chatted about something happy in Donald Duck's voice, and-
My fingers counted each name I uttered and, ah.
I think… he likes the color blue as well.
I scratched my cheek, feeling the tiny mole under my left eye, and I remembered.
My eyes are blue.
.
.
( ̴̶̨͚̪̬͓̰͕̩͚͎͍̤̻̜͖̖̒̌͗̒̋ͅʍ̴̢̪̩̞̬̞̯͖͙͖̳͈̌̈́͌̓͜͝ơ̷̛͓͙̺͚͖̐̃̌̿̎̿̀̎̀̊̎͜͜ų̷͔̜̣͇̼̰͖͍͕̙͔͉̞̟͂̾̾̚͝ ̴̡̛̬̬͇͙̭̫̞̪̳̪͙̔̿ͅɹ̵̡̮̟͑̑͗̊̉̿̄̕̕o̴̡̩̦̣̘̗̫̜͔̯̺̪͐͋͛̄͜͜Ⅎ̵̛̛̫͚͐̋͂̄)̸̢̨̱̬͈̻̄̊̚
.
.
Strands of hair tickled my neck, and I brushed them back as I played with the short bangs framing my face. Examining how each lock reflected Othe's white snowy mind, before returning my hair to its black oblivion sheen.
How could I forget such a minor detail?
This is my body we're talking about.
.̷̡͝.̵̲̚.̴̖́ŗ̴̔i̴̳͐g̴̻̓h̵͔̿t̶̠͂?̸̬͗
"UU!"
I looked down and snorted, covering my mouth to restrain myself from coming across as a maniac.
Smooth, semi-solid foam suspended in a structure of water, sugar, and ice crystals dripped from Othe's sides. He kept glowing and moving up and down with a face replete with frozen delight.
'Is this ice cream?' I asked incredulously. 'That's not how you… Ah, whatever.'
I knelt and removed the excess of the soft, whipped treat of milk and cream from his glimmer. 'You like it?'
"UU uu UU uu!"
Never in my entire existence had I seen someone nod so quickly.
This time I couldn't stop the rising full-blown laughter. 'Wait till you see the real deal.'
'Yes,' My eyes crinkled, matching the intensity of Othe's bluish body, tilting at my declaration. 'My treat. In fact, it'll be our first destination once we leave here. Promise!'
Having the embodiment of a kindling star as company has its perks. Like the flame of a lantern guiding you, you are never lost in the dark.
(Ì̶̢͈̙͔̯̤̰̝͙͖̪̺̪̩̪̻͔̍ͅͅ was a broken carcass, and he the last light that remained in the darkness.)
*Badump*
*Badump*
*Badump*
*Badump*
Like a tiny cocoon, we rolled into a ball, feeling reassured in each other's presence. Praying for nothing but a better outcome for us.
･ﾟﾟ･:｡.｡:ུ۪: ｡.｡ *･ﾟﾟ･
(Dubbilex carried on in silence, feeling what could not be felt.
The many impressions of life beyond labs.
Fragments of freedom never grasped.
The wind blew. The seasons ushered in.
And finally…
The beautiful, beautiful world was broken by his words.
'Are you aware this is not real?')
･ﾟﾟ･:｡.｡:ུ۪: ｡.｡ *･ﾟﾟ･
Daily Report
Subject: Female.
Growth Period: 6 weeks.
Observations:
Initial 10% recessive genes have increased to 30%. Scans show the two bumps protruding from the skull, coinciding with neither original donor. G-Gnome neonates produce conclusive results.
Resistance to [Access Denied] has been fruitful, contrasting antecedent analyses. To prevent earlier derangements, the [Access Denied] genome has been adjusted to 30%. Gaps are filled with [Access Denied] by 30%.
Responses to mental commands are satisfactory. Neuronal activity and synergy when placed next to [Access DENIED] have risen by 20%. Diverged from the initial 5% potential for [HIGHER CLEARANCE REQUIRED].
The remaining parentage has yet to be identified. Further measures were promptly implemented to prevent contamination from the ongoing [CLASSIFIED. UNAUTHORIZED ENTRY HAS BEEN DETECTED].
[SHUTTING DOWN STATISTICS]
[SHUTTING DOWN FILES]
[SHUTTING DOWN…]
Conclusions:
Violent tendencies detected. Manageable. Approved stratagem to control and push to [Access DENIED]'s direct line of fire.
Growth is steady. Standard weeks are in line with the former prognosis.
The increasing instability of Project [Access DENIED] can cause it to be destroyed if taken from the pod beforehand. Previous report lists necessary precautions. Termination used as a last resort.
If the final product differs from the set parameters, Project [ACCESS DENIED] is to be stored in the Cadmus ice chambers until further relocation.
̶A̶l̶t̶e̶r̶n̶a̶t̶i̶v̶e̶s̶ ̶a̶r̶e̶ ̶i̶n̶j̶e̶c̶t̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶i̶n̶f̶l̶u̶x̶ ̶s̶u̶p̶p̶l̶y̶ ̶o̶f̶ ̶[ACCESS DENIED]. [ACCESS DENIED]. KEEP AWAY FROM [ACCESS DENIED]. Unless you're inept and not taking your job seriously, I'd highly recommend omitting that last option. Untested samples with extreme destructive capabilities CAN and WILL have unforeseen results.
-Dr. Harper.
[FURTHER ACCESS HAS BEEN LOCKED]
"Again."
The world outside quaked by the slamming of ice and grey creatures containing a feral clone back to its pod.
তততততততততততততততততততততততত
SI be like :
SI: *Eats, cries, and sleeps.*
Othe: *Allergic to words.*
Dubbilex: *Bad with technology.*
Meanwhile:
Dr. Harper: *Just chilling.*
Dr. Spence: *Done with her life.*
Bob: *Loves drama unfolding.*
A/N:
Apples have many symbolizations. In this case: wishing for good health and future happiness.
A hope for a sweet year ahead.