Fairly short chapter since the way the second half was going I felt it would be necessary for it to be it's own chapter.

Also, my brain is going crazy NOT fixing intended spelling errors (who knew writing drunk text could be so hard?)

Atem attempted to rise to his feet, wanting to once again beat the Tomb Keeper senseless. After a couple (unsuccessful) tries, he finally managed to find himself standing upright. He hadn't raised his head though until he was certain he could stay that way. When he finally did, he found himself face-to-face with the one person he really didn't want to see right now: his (former) wife. Kat swiped the already half-empty bottle from his hand while tipping him backward into the fluffy cushion below with a single finger push.

"Idiot. You can barely stand, and you want to throw hands? Also, you do realize this vintage is from the late 1800's and is much more potent than what we drank five-thousand years ago?" Kat's tone indicated she wasn't asking Atem questions, but rather chastising him.

"I am barely...accepting us...apart...and you're already sleeping with...him," Atem both stated and accused, his words coming out a bit jarringly as he tried to think in his wine-induced daze.

"So? That is none of your concern. Now stay. You can have this back after you've eaten something proper." Kat turned and walked away, taking the bottle with her and passing it off to Marik. "Hold on to this. I'll be right back." She then barked an order towards Malik. "If he tries to stand again..." Kat looked back towards Atem, "...feel free to use whatever force you deem necessary."

Malik grinned maliciously as he looked towards Atem. "So if he happens to end up with a broken knee-cap...or two…"

"Go for it."

Malik's grin widened, causing Atem to audibly gulp and become slightly sober. Kat marched off to a hidden corner of the room and vanished.

Marik walked over towards the Ishtari, leaning in close to speak privately. "That was a bit harsh to suggest," he stated.

Malik continued to grin while staring towards Atem, then replied in Arabic. "Don't worry, it's just a bluff. It's how ka-ib keeps the Pharaoh in line when he's had too much to drink. My orders were to obey her every command and keep her safe, to place her above him in every aspect. He's not willing to test the limits of whether or not I would actually harm him," he chuckled darkly, making it appear as though the two Ishtar's were conspiring something.

The Tomb Keeper looked at the Ishtari in mild confusion. "Why did you switch to my native tongue?" he questioned, speaking in Arabic as well.

"Because the Pharaoh doesn't know it," Malik snickered, still eyeing Atem from where he stood.

Marik looked towards the spiky-haired boy-king, suddenly wondering how he was able to speak with Yugi and the others. Technically the only language he should have known was his native Kemetic.

"He retains the ability to speak in the languages that his former host's were able to speak. None have ever spoken Arabic though," Malik commented as a reply to Marik's confused expression.

"I see. So the bluff, speaking to me in my native tongue...it's all just a ruse to keep the Pharaoh from doing anything stupid?"

"Precisely."

"You're enjoying this, aren't you?"

"Immensely."

Marik smiled in amusement and chuckled. Malik joined him, making Atem extremely worried to the point that he dared to ask Bakura what the two were saying.

The pale elemental smirked and played along with the ruse. "They're comparing torture methods. Mal likes the suggestion the Tomb Keeper came up with. A digit missing for every time you step out of line. Let's see, a grand total of 20 between fingers and toes. That means plenty of chances, right? Unless they're talking about cutting off at the knuckle joints, that gives you more tries. Let's see...three per finger...two per thumb…" Bakura looked at Atem's feet, muttering numbers and trying to do some minor calculations.

"Why are you...looking at my feet?" Atem asked nervously.

"Trying to determine if you're one of those weirdos with the genetic mutation that makes you have less phalanges on your feet. It's easy to see you have the correct amount on your hands, but being I never spent much time kissing the ground at your feet like many of your other subjects, I'm not certain how they look."

"Wait...less what?"

"The individual bones in your fingers and toes. They're called phalanges. Did you learn nothing from being in Yugi's head? I know for a fact they at least covered basic anatomy in that pitiful excuse for a learning facility," Bakura scoffed.

"Oh. I suppose...I never paid much attention."

Bakura rolled his eyes. "Figures." He then pretended to become very interested in what the two Ishtar's were saying, then grinned devilishly. "Now they are wondering if Kat would allow them to cut out your tongue the next time you say something that pisses her off."

Atem paled. "She wouldn't allow that...would she?"

Bakura shrugged. "Who knows? I mean, with that temper of hers being what it is…" He left the rest up to Atem's imagination while slyly winking towards Malik and Marik.

"I can't believe Bakura is on this too!" Marik stated loudly while laughing, still talking in Arabic to keep up the ruse.

"The Runt enjoys a good deception. It is his specialty after all." Malik commented.

"Is that how he was able to fool people so easily into thinking he was Ryou?"

"For the most part."

The two stood by and watched as Atem became more and more uncomfortable under their taunting laughter.

"Where is that damned woman?!" Atem cursed irritably under his breath, his arms folded across his chest and his eyes closed as though he were pouting.

"I'm right here if you would open your eyes," came Kat's equally irritated reply.

Atem opened them and found Kat crouched before him, balancing a plate of ta'amiya on one palm. He casually looked over the fried fava bean patties, then looked up towards the one providing them. "You didn't make these, did you?" he asked suspiciously. He knew Kat's reputation in the kitchen. The glare he received in reply made him wonder if he should risk a bite.

"Kura picked them up from a street vendor at my request. It's something I recall you enjoyed. I could have been a bitch and had him go pick up batarekh instead," she stated, referring to a dish made from salted fish roe.

Atem replied by scrunching up his nose at the mere suggestion of the one food he loathed. He picked up one of the falafel patties and took a small bite, testing it. He had thought the apples from earlier were heaven, but the ta'amiya was divine. He took another larger bite and closed his eyes, taking in the familiarity of the meal. It was one of his favorites from ancient times, and he couldn't believe that it still existed in this era. Added to it was the fact that his Queen had remembered which foods he loved and which he hated (as she had proven by mentioning the roe). Everything about her life had become so centered around him. As Atem took another bite, he tried to recall those same details about Kat. It should be simple, right? She liked….what did she like? He swallowed his current bite and opened his eyes, those sapphires still watching him to make certain he actually ate. He looked down at the patty, then back towards Kat. Maybe he could start with trying to remember something easier, like a favorite color. He recalled she wore a lot of black and various shades of red. But so did Bakura and Malik. Didn't Bakura mention something once about those colors being easier to hide blood? There had to be something he knew she liked? What about her apple orchard? Their first meeting had ended up partially the way it did because at the time she had been curious about the fruit. But that was still something that revolved around him. Did she enjoy anything simply for herself?

Kat looked at Atem curiously, trying to figure out why he had stopped eating and now appeared...sad? "Did I remember wrong?"

Her question pulled Atem away from his internal musings. "No. It's exactly as you remembed...remem...recalled." He suddenly realized that perhaps Kat was right to take away the wine.

"Then why do you hesitate? I already told you I didn't make them. Or are they just not as good as the ones from back then?"

Atem hung his head. "I just realized...I know nothing about you. I don't know what you like. I don't even know your favorite color, or food...or anything."

"Here we go…" Malik said quietly towards Marik, rolling his eyes.

"I take it this is normal?" the Tomb Keeper questioned.

"Yup. He's started to overthink."

Bakura leaned back and tossed aside one of his bottles, which was now empty.

"Atem, none of that matters right now. Just eat. Then you can have the wine back and go back to trying to forget everything you do remember. Honestly, if I wasn't worried about you dying of alcohol poisoning, I wouldn't even bother making you eat. But I didn't use a portion of my own life essence to bring you back just so you could die stupidly," Kat replied irritably towards the dejected looking Pharaoh.

Atem's head hung even lower, tears forming in the corners of his eyes. "You have done everything...just for me...and I can't name a single thing about you...that doesn't have to do with me."

Malik released an exasperated sigh. "Here come the tears…"

"How drunk is he?" Marik wondered aloud.

"Enough that he'll feel it in the morning, but not enough to do something stupid. The latter is much more entertaining to watch. This just makes me want to put him out of his misery," the Ishtari replied boredly.

Kat rolled her eyes then sat down cross-legged before Atem, leaning an elbow on one knee and her chin in her palm. She looked at the semi-drunk king before her with the same dull expression she had hundreds of times before. Drunk Atem was handsy and horny, but semi-drunk Atem needed massive amounts of therapy...and Kat had become accustomed to taking on the task of therapist. She sat up straight for a moment and glanced over her shoulder towards Marik. "If you're adjusted to Domino time, I'll understand if you want to go get some sleep. I would join you, but…" she motioned unenthusiastically towards Atem, who had already begun to cry into his palms.

"Actually I'm still kind of in the process of getting used to it. I'm a bit exhausted, but otherwise still very much awake," Marik replied. He had to admit, the sun being just past the midday mark instead of already setting helped him in not feeling so tired.

"Suit yourself. Just know I'm going to be stuck here for a bit. Feel free to watch what I've had to put up with since the day I said 'Yes', or if there's something that you wanted to know more about around this place, I'm certain Mal wouldn't mind filling you in."

"I can show him the lower levels," Malik suggested.

"Lower levels? There's more to this place?" Marik asked in amazement.

"Yes. They're fairly new additions. Our collections have grown over the millennia, and there isn't enough room in our main chambers to house them."

Marik was genuinely interested in seeing what kind of items the trio of elementals had attained and held onto over the millennia, but at the same time wanted to stick around in case things went south between Kat and Atem again.

"Go. I can call for Mal if I need either of you," Kat stated, seeing the difficult choice between wanting to go and wanting to stay in the Tomb Keeper's conflicted expression.

"You sure? I don't mind staying.".

Kat nodded. "He's not going to do or say anything stupid in this state. It's just tedious getting him past it. Besides, it will give you and Mal more time to get to know one another better."

Both Ishtar's faces became ones of slight shock. Malik recovered first, glaring suspiciously at the flame elemental. "Ka-ib, if you have something to say…"

Kat feigned ignorance. "Hm? Say? About what?"

The Ishtari scowled and grumbled something under his breath, then began walking towards his chambers, motioning for the Tomb Keeper to follow. Marik hesitated for a moment, then began to walk behind Malik, making a quick stop to crouch down and give his girlfriend a quick peck on the lips.

Bakura, after emptying his second bottle, walked over to fetch another round, slightly wobbling as he did. He once again uncorked one for each hand, then promptly returned to watch the spectacle unfold.

"Kura, you're not helping," Kat scolded.

"What? Just because his Royal Highness is having a crisis...I have to listen to it sober?"

"No, you can go drink somewhere else."

"Or...I can sit wherever the fuck I want...in my own home."

"It's his home too."

"No it's not..." Atem blubbered. "You only made this place for me...but it's not mine..."

Kat scowled towards Bakura. "Now look at what you've done."

"Or...here's an idea...it's his own fault. I'm staying...and so is the booze. Don't like it...then make him move."

Kat looked at Atem and rolled her eyes, deciding against her better judgment to return the bottle Marik had left beside her. "Listen, you can have this back, but you have to eat too."

"I don't want it...it doesn't help...it just makes me miss you more…" Atem was nearly inconsolable at this point.

Kat rolled her head back and groaned irritably. "Gods Atem...just take the damn bottle and eat. For me? Please?" she begged.

Hearing it put that way, Atem finished off the half-eaten falafel patty and took a large swallow of wine...followed by another swallow...and another…

"Easy there. I'm not going to take away the bottle again," Kat reassured.

"Why am I such...a bad person…" Atem's usual 'formality' when speaking had suddenly evaded him as the wine impaired his thought processes even further.

"You're not a bad person. You've just made a few bad decisions," Kat replied.

"I am! I don't...I don't know what you like...but you do….you know…"

Kat was certain to anyone else, what Atem had said didn't make a lick of sense. She knew what he was trying to say though. "It's all I've thought about for such a long time. It was hard losing you, and I was afraid that I would forget."

"But you didn't.."

"Exactly."

"And I did…"

Back to square one. Kat decided to try a different approach. "So tell me something that you do remember. Not something I like necessarily. Just something in general."

"You wanted to...to...to be...a priestess."

"See, there's something that doesn't revolve around you."

"But you came back...because you couldn't…"

"I came back because Mal was a loyal idiot and wanted your blessing."

"And I messed it up…"

"I guess that's one way to look at it. Hey look! You still have plenty of ta'amiya. Mind if we share it?" Kat tried to not only divert Atem from the topic, but to get him to eat a bit more before he went back for another drink.

Atem stared hazily at the plate between them, taking another of the patties and eating it. Kat did the same, but slowly to give the illusion to the drunken king that since she was still eating, he should be too. Atem managed to ingest another two, taking long drinks between them and nearly emptying the bottle.

"See, now don't you feel a bit better?" Kat continued to speak to Atem as though he were a toddler getting over a tantrum...which wasn't too far off the mark in her opinion.

"No...maybe…" Atem swayed slightly. "You shhould wear blue...like your eyezzz…" He added unnecessary effort to his words as the wine impaired his thoughts even further.

'Great...here comes drunk and horny Atem…' Kat groaned internally. "Maybe some other time. Are you tired? It's been a long day," she suggested. 'Fuck, and just when I sent Mal away!'

"No...I want to...to sstay...and look at you…"

A bottle rolled across the floor as Bakura tossed aside his third, drawing Atem's attention towards the pale elemental beside him. Bakura was laying as far back into his cushion as possible, still clutching his remaining bottle in one hand, while raising his other hand far above him. He splayed his fingers and flexed them, as though studying them intently.

"You're….like a ghosttt…"

Bakura's eyes glistened as he continued to study his complexion, appearing sad.

Kat cursed internally. 'Dammit! Now I gotta put up with TWO drunks?!'

"I hate this body…it's so pale...and weak...and not mine…"

"It...its looks good…"

Bakura quickly downed the remainder of the other bottle, tossed it aside, then rolled over with his face in the cushion. He then attempted to raise his head, but it flopped back down. His shoulders began to heave up and down as he began to cry.

Kat hung her head in defeat. 'Kura...why?'

"It doesn't look good! I'm like a...a...a fluffy Pomeranian!" Bakura balled, his voice muffled by the material his face was buried into.

Atem attempted to lean over to comfort Bakura, but only succeeded in falling over and ending up beside the sobbing elemental. He fluffed some of Bakura's hair, then for some odd reason decided it was soft enough to be a pillow of its own, and laid his head across Bakura's shoulders. This prompted the elemental to forcefully lift his head as he attempted to look back to see what Atem was doing.

"Why are you...on me…?"

"It's sssofttt...I like it…"

"It's too long...it gets in the way…"

Atem snuggled closer, enjoying his new pillow. "It's perfectt…" His hand petted at the red linen robe that covered Bakura's back.

The elemental managed to shrug him off and flip over so that he would stop. This didn't deter Drunk Atem. He simply crawled over and did the unthinkable: He shoved his tongue into Bakura's unsuspecting mouth. Bakura did the unthinkable as well: He reciprocated the action.

Kat's eyes became extremely large as she stared in blank confusion. Sober Atem and Sober Bakura would have easily tried to beat the shit out of each other by now. But apparently Drunk Atem and Drunk Bakura...wanted to make out?

The Millennium items each possessed were quickly removed and tossed aside, clanking noisily on the marble flooring. Atem's crown followed.

Kat continued to stare wide-eyed as the two removed whatever barriers stood between them and their single-minded objective with a speed she hadn't thought possible. 'Mkhai, I REALLY hope you have the cameras in this room turned on, because no one is going to believe me!' She looked around, trying to figure out if she should put a stop to the drunken make-out session, or leave them to do...whatever the hell this was quickly becoming.

Bakura released a Ryou-esque sound as Atem began sucking on a pale nipple.

'Oh gods...this is like watching a train-wreck...it's both horrifying and intriguing to watch…'

More Ryou-esque sounds escaped from the pale elemental, and they only served to intensify Drunk Atem's voracity towards Drunk Bakura.

'Kura is going to kill him in the morning...but…' A mischievous grin formed across Kat's face. '...on the plus side, Atem can't complain about going to bed alone anymore…' She quickly transfigured into her cat form and jetted across the room, hoping she hadn't drawn the attention of the groping pair. She dared to look back, just to make sure, then proceeded to make her way to where the two Ishtar's had taken off to.

So, someone (who shall remain unnamed...you still know who you are) made a non-existent ship after only reading the 1st two chapters. My brain did that 'Now how would that work...?' thing...and my brain figured out how to make it happen...and it involved a lot of wine. A certain thief is gonna be super pissed when he wakes up.