Konosuba: God's Blessing On This Alternate World

by OogaBoogaUngaBunga8

In an alternate universe, Kazuma decides to be reborn as a baby back at Japan. Unfortunately, Aqua makes an oopsie and reincarnates Kazuma to be reborn into the Isekai world, with no cheat item. The characters in this story will mostly be original, with slight alterations to their backstory and personality. KazumaxDarkness/Lalatina This is my version of Konosuba, enjoy.

6. Chapter 5: May We All Live In Peace!

I had managed to save up about 6 million eris...

So why did I still feel like I was at square one when it came to establishing my future livelihood?

I could have had 301 million eris right now, with 150 million for my family and the remainder for myself and maybe my party members.

Instead, I found myself stuck, desperately seeking quick cash—I mean, exploring opportunities for a small business that could eventually outshine all others in this world.

First of all, I needed to figure out where to start in creating my own business.

There was no way I could run one without the necessary permits, so perhaps I should inquire about obtaining a vendor license.

I estimated I could allocate around 600,000 eris for the main building, but even that would dent 10% of my entire net worth.

Maybe I could find a shop that allowed me to lease space and invest less in features like a new counter or a stall to place inside.

Of course, I'd need employees.

I had no intention of lugging heavy items around by myself for an entire 8-hour shift. I had other, um, adventurer work to focus on.

Megumin was out of the question, as she was bound to cause a ruckus for no apparent reason.

Aqua who has remarkable talent for unusual things is a contender but given her ability to accumulate debt, I decided to wait until the business was more successful.

And then there was Darkness, who had demonstrated formidable strength when she overpowered the jaw strength of a Brutal Alligator and went toe-to-toe with Beldia The Dullahan.

She possesses the stamina and endurance to endure probably 16-hour shifts without a break.

But there was no way she would agree to work for me.

All this brainstorming was giving me a headache.

I had thought making money would be so straightforward, but it seemed that adventure work was the quickest way, aside from construction labor.

And I definitely did not want to go back to construction work.

For some reason, one of the guys kept slapping me on the buttocks.

Initially, I thought it was just harmless bromance, but the way he stared into my eyes was the same way I stare at the receptionist lady's chest.

"I'm starting to go broke again. Shall we take on another quest?"

Megumin asked, taking a bite out of her peas and carrots, the cheapest dish on the menu.

"Yeah, I'm getting a little bored now. Perhaps it is time to adventure to the outside world."

The sheltered noble lady said with her fist pumped up.

"A is for Aqua, A-A-Aqua... Q is for Quiet, the calm she brings..."

This other girl is in her own world, playing with the soap figurines she created to earn a quick buck.

I had learned about the necessity of a vendor license from her when she was scolded by the police chief for selling her creations without one.

"I can't believe I have to say this but... We need to take a dangerous quest for once."

"At last, Kazuma, you're starting to appreciate the thrill of taking down a formidable and dangerous monster with an Explosion to the face! Allow me to choose one for us."

Megumin enthused.

To keep her seated, I swiped Megumin's plate to prevent her from rushing off.

"Kazuma, this is a first. Have you finally come to understand the joy that adventuring brings to your heart?"

It's the money, Darkness, only the money.

"Here ya go."

Aqua had vanished from the table without me noticing, and she had retrieved a quest notice from the board.

How she managed to be so efficient at times like this was a mystery.

Maybe I should ask her if she wants to work as my main delivery woman.

I took a closer look at the quest notice in my hand.

"Snow Sprites?"

Did they mean the same snow sprites my mother used to warn me to steer clear of?

She never explained why I should avoid them, but if my parents considered them dangerous, then they were dangerous in my book.

"Denied for personal reasons."

For some reason, in the back of my mind, there was some sort of feeling of regret the moment I rejected it.

A feeling that yearns for something I cannot describe.

I chose to ignore it and got up from my seat to return the quest notice to the board.

The other girls followed suit and we began to scour for easy and rewarding quests.

I know I just said we had to take a dangerous opponent but I literally just rejected a small snowball creature for christ sake.

"Kazuma. Kazuma."

A new quest notice caught my attention: 'Hunt down the White Wolf pack attacking the farm, 1,000,000 eris.'

The wolf pack was a formidable adversary. They were larger and swifter than most canine-type monsters, and if they attacked as a group, we'd be overwhelmed.

Denied.

Next, there was a notice about a 'One-Hit Bear' that had awakened from hibernation. It offered a reward of 2,000,000 eris for killing it or 500,000 eris for driving it away.

The bear was absolutely out of the question.

Megumin and I could easily meet our end with just a single scratch from that beast. Plus, I wanted nothing to do with a monster that bore such a terrifying name as 'One-Hit Bear.'

Denied.

The name did sound oddly familiar, though. I felt like I'd heard it somewhere before.

I glanced at the quests to my right.

To my surprise, Darkness, who was standing beside me, wore a troubled expression when her eyes fell upon a particular quest.

I was about to investigate further when Aqua, who had been uncharacteristically calm all morning, suddenly reverted to her energetic self and thrust a quest notice in front of my face.

It read: 'My pet Warthog is lost in my wheatfields! 500,000 eris if you're able to find it, Dead or Alive!'

Don't you want your pet to be alive, contractor?

"This quest doesn't seem too bad. The rewards are positive. Good work, Aqua."

"Mhm."

"Umm, Kazuma, if you encounter a Warthog, it may not be a good thing for you... Especially since..."

Darkness began with a worried tone.

"It's just the size of a normal pig. The only dangerous part is its sharp tusks. Someone like you should be able to handle it with no problem."

I was about to uncover my thumb that was hiding a small red text at the bottom of the notice, but Aqua snatched it from my hands and accepted it, marking the second time she had done something talented in the same hour...

...

"Thank you so much for accepting my quest. If you manage to find it within an hour, I'll give you some of my crops free of charge."

Sweet, free food added to the rewards.

The person who posted the quest was a female farmer with a sizable expanse of farmland.

"You own quite a bit of land for someone who lives alone. It must be tough to manage it all by yourself during harvest season."

I remarked to the lady.

"Tell me about it. If only my son, who's upstairs, could help me deliver the crops. I'd make him search for my lost pet, but I can't risk it. In fact, I tell him to stay away from it's path but that doesn't mean he should stay lock up in his room."

"No need to endanger your son's life, young lady. Allow me to handle the rest of the work for you. If you ever want your crops delivered without breaking your back, you know where to find me."

"Did he just call her 'young lady' to try to pitch his questionable business idea..."

"No doubt about it. I've heard that line so many times back home, and I know its various intentions when used..."

"I wouldn't mind being referred to as a young lady instead of a little girl, Kazuma."

Shut up, audience.

The lady was in her 40s, which was still young in her eyes.

"You're too kind, young man, and your willingness to accept this quest is brave enough. Now, I need to go prepare some food for my son."

We made our way to the farmer's wheatfields, which stretched about 50 meters in width and length. It was roughly the same amount of fertile soil that my family had owned before The Destroyer had ruined it all.

"Kazuma, doesn't this remind you of your family's farmhouse? Maybe you should send them a letter to let them know how you're doing."

Aqua suggested.

I had originally planned to send them a letter along with a check for 150 million eris, but given my recent clumsy antics and penchant for stirring up trouble, I decided to hold off on sending my first letter for the time being.

"This is the first time I've heard about this. Kazuma, you used to be a farmer?"

Darkness inquired to me.

I believe I had mentioned my bitterness regarding the governor's allocation of a small plot of land to my parents, but I hadn't specified that it was for farming.

"I used to be, until The Destroyer wreaked havoc, destroying everything in its path. We ended up living in a small refugee camp for a while. It all happened about 10 years ago, so I'd rather not dwell on it right now."

Even the mere thought of the living conditions in those camps stirred a deep anger within me.

"I see then."

Respectfully, she dropped the subject entirely.

"Well, what Kazuma had wasn't as bad as my living conditions. Back in my village, I was born in a horse stable—"

Squeal!

Before Megumin could delve into her own living conditions, a short but loud squeal emanated from somewhere in the wheatfields.

"Ah, I heard it! It came from that way!"

"No, Aqua, it came from this way!"

"Darkness and Aqua, both of you are mistaken. I believe I heard it coming from this direction! I'll use Explosion just to show you that it's over here!"

Hey, don't say something stupid and do it right after!

While the three girls relied on their instincts to pinpoint the pet warthog's location, I had another method in mind to find it.

Now was the time...

"Come out, Kiritsu!"

I commanded my newfound cheat weapon.

Kiritsu, (規律), is a word often used to refer to discipline in the sense of rules, regulations, or orderliness. It can also imply self-discipline or adherence to a set of principles or guidelines.

For example, in a school or organization, it might refer to maintaining discipline or following established rules.

I would've called it 'Shūren', (修練), because it is more closely related to the idea of training, practice, or cultivation. It can be used to describe the discipline involved in honing one's skills or abilities.

For instance, in martial arts or sports, it can refer to the rigorous training and practice that athletes or practitioners undergo.

Both 'Kiritsu' and 'Shūren' still mean discipline, something both my father and Miyamoto Musashi preached for.

However, 'Kiritsu' sounded much cooler in my opinion. It also shared the first letter 'K' with my name, just like 'Kazuma'.

The sentient weapon and I are practically twins!

K for Kazuma, Kiritsu, Katana.

Kiritsu levitated out of my belt and hung in mid-air, scanning the area for the wayward warthog.

The sentient weapon and I had struck a deal the day after defeating Beldia the Dullahan.

The more I took care of it, whether it was clean or dirty, the more it pledged allegiance and loyalty to me.

"I almost forgot your sword existed. You still look and act like the ordinary person I met outside of town that day."

"Quiet, Aqua. Focus on the quest that you accepted."

"Chunchunmaru is still a better name for it..."

"No it won't be. Hey, quit nodding! That will never be your name!"

Kiritsu playfully nodded and emitted happy chirping noises when Megumin called him that pitiful name.

I decided to call it a 'him' because the other three girls looked at me with pity when I called it a 'her' that one time.

"Darkness, you didn't bring your sword?"

"There is no need to bring it if I can't hit it anyway. Especially an animal such as this..."

That wasn't something good she just said. Did she just raised a flag?

Kiritsu emitted an irritated chirp and zoomed off in the direction of the presumed stray warthog.

"Wow, it's pretty fast. The last time I saw it move like this was when it clashed against Beldia's broadsword."

Megumin commented.

"Fufu... This quest was super easy! Let's treat ourselves to something expensive from the menu when dinner arrives!"

"Aqua, I think you just said something you shouldn't have!"

"Kazuma, look, I think Kiritsu found it!"

Darkness pointed out.

Did he?

For some reason, Kiritsu was slicing away at the wheatfields, but not the entire crops—just the upper portion of them.

"If he found it, he should've at least frightened the Warthog into squealing again... Something's not right."

Actually...

The closer I looked at what Kiritsu was doing...

"This dumb sword! He's trying to cut the tops of some of the wheat to make it the same height as the rest! Does he have OCD along with his unpredictable personality?!"

For a moment, I had thought this sword would be as competent as it had been in the past, but not anymore.

Or maybe it was because he didn't sense any real danger, so he wasn't in his 'serious mode' or whatever. It's just something I made up.

Squeal!

The noise that the warthog made was getting closer than ever.

The noise of the warthog was getting closer than ever.

"It came from this way, I'm absolutely sure!"

Having given up on Kiritsu's capabilities, I relied on my own instincts like the others.

In the distance, I was correct in my guess, seeing a path of wheat being trampled by the warthog.

Except, it was charging toward us faster than we had anticipated...

"Kazuma, I think it's best for you to run!"

"Why is that?"

"Because—"

Darkness chose the wrong time to start a conversation, and I was just dumb enough to engage in it.

The warthog had reached a terrifying Mach 5, hurtling straight toward me with clear intent to harm me.

"Ah..."

The three girls stood in shock.

The warthog's snout collided with my most delicate and precious area of my manhood.

Its tusks dug deep into my inner thighs, severing tendons and intensifying the agony.

With its speed and relatively small size, the warthog's impact sent me flying into the air before I crashed painfully onto my back.

"Kazuma!"
"Kazuma!"
"Kazuma!"

I could only emit a small, agonized squeal just like the Warthog as I writhed in pain, clutching my injured manhood.

"Avenge me..."

"You're not dead, Kazuma. You can't die because I need to return to the heavens."

I want to die again...

"Carry on my legacy, Kiritsu..."

"Your soul isn't going to transfer into the sword as well..."

Squeal!

"Oh, it looks like your sword has captured it. Good work, Kazuma. As a reward, I'll heal you from your injuries. Heal!"

Why did healing have to be a reward in the first place?

The indescribable pain instantly vanished, and I stood up with a freshly restored manhood.

Quest Complete!
Reward: 500,000 Eris!

...

"Thank you so much for finding my pet Warthog. After divorcing my husband, I decided to seek the best self-protection animal that money could buy!"

The farm lady expressed her gratitude while cradling the warthog in her arms and stroking its head.

"No problem. And for the rewards...?"

"Oh right, here ya go! A couple of peas and carrots for all of you!"

She gave us the large bag of money and the... small bag of food...

This was literally the food that Megumin ate earlier...

"Have it."

"Thanks!"

Megumin ate it all in one bite.

"Hey, you just ate the plastic bag as well..."

"Mhm, what about it?"

"..."

We left the farm, contemplating on our teamwork.

"I should've told you this earlier, Kazuma. I am sorry that I was too hesitant to say it..."

I am not the type to accept an apology from someone's own fatal mistake.

"My manhood was violated, Darkness. Violated! I expect some compensation for almost losing my only precious item..."

Kiritsu began to wriggle in my sword belt.

"Y-You're also precious to me! Don't worry!"

"I don't know how I should compensate, but I'll try to think of a way how. Warthogs are known for being violent towards humans, especially males. Generations ago, every male hunter started to hunt them all down for sport. The warthogs eventually began to pick up every man's weak point and took it as their advantage. Their infamous idea was inherited by their offspring and so on..."

In simpler terms, Darkness meant:

Warthogs are one of the most dangerous animals to mankind, especially males.

After being hunted for generations, they can smell a male human from a mile away, taking advantage of their one weakness that had a 100% fatality and success rate.

This behavior was passed down through generations until now.

The farm lady likely bought it to protect herself and her son from their abusive husband and father...

This world is indeed weird...

...

A week later, I brought Aqua with me to an important business meeting.

Darkness was busy arm-wrestling all the guys in the guild and surprisingly winning.

I decided to place a bet on her with a small portion of my money, hoping to make a quick fortune with my high luck stat.

Megumin had disappeared again for the tenth time since joining our party. I wondered where she went.

I thought we were the only people she hung out with, but she probably had other friends her age.

"So, why am I attending this business meeting of yours? It's going to fail no matter what."

Aqua complained, crossing her arms like a toddler being taken to the doctor's office.

"Say one more word, and you'll be paying for your own breakfast."

"Fine, but I'll order the most expensive dish when it's your turn to pay."

"I'll do the same when it's your turn to pay for lunch, and that's coming right around the corner."

"I'll do the same when Darkness pays for dinner!"

"Don't bring her into this. Oh, it looks like we're here."

We arrived at a small shop that sold magical items. Aqua and I had met this person during the week's time-skip.

"Listen, the next person you see in this shop, don't do anything reckless."

"Who do you take me for? I'm an innocent woman who shows respect to everyone."

"And don't pickpocket or shoplift anything."

She was surprisingly talented when it came to thievery, even though she wasn't a Thief class.

"Got it!"

With a dramatic push, she opened the door.

"Hey, it's you!"

"Eek!"

"C'mere! I'll confiscate your clothing and turn your potions into water for your crimes!"

"I should've expected this to happen..."

"A-Aqua-sama, please refrain from purifying me! I-I have a lot of contracts that I have signed myself into!"

"You have all these multi-million eris contracts, have your own shop, and I'm over here sleeping in the stables with a horny teenager and a little girl who almost blew up everyone with her sleepwalk if I didn't wake up in time!"

"I-I'm not horny!"

Also, did she just say something that I should be wary about?

"In the name of God, I shall smite you! Undead Lich, your futile actions... You've merely turned your screams into the trumpets of hell!"

"Ahhh!"

"God Bl-"

Bonk!

"Ow! Kazuma, why'd you hit me?!"

"Thank you, Kazuma-san. It's good to see you again."

"Yo, Wiz."

This kind and normal lady was Wiz, well she wasn't exactly normal, she's a lich.

King or Queen of the Undead.

With normal people, they all fear liches for their extraordinary physical and magical capabilities being heightened to an extreme.

With Aqua, the liches fear her for her... godhood...?

Despite her unconventional nature, Wiz was perhaps the only kind and seemingly ordinary woman I had encountered in this bizarre world, aside from my own mother.

Each night, she diligently carried out the duty that should have been Aqua's responsibility, guiding wandering spirits from the graveyard to the realms of Heaven. However, as Archpriests didn't perform their services for free, Wiz had been tasked with the laborious and unenviable work.

I can't tell if the evil people are good or the good people are evil in this world anymore.

I forced Aqua to do her job that was supposed to be originally hers, in exchange, I would pay breakfast for her and the others.

Aqua would pay for lunch, and Darkness would pay for dinner.

Megumin would... We didn't actually tell her to pay for anything since having a little girl pay for us seems like a stab to our pride as adults.

"Your tea, Aqua-sama."

"Hmm.. let's see if you're as good as Darkness when she makes her tea."

Hey, why didn't I get a taste of Darkness's tea?

I could see Aqua's eyes open wide for a split second before she went back to pissy mode.

"For a lich, you do make an adequate tea... Fetch me some more before it turns into water!"

"Right away!"

After Aqua was satisfied with her bullying, Wiz and I began to discuss our business.

Turns out she was the brown-haired woman that I encountered, having multiple crates of strange magical items fall all over her.

"So, your monthly payment for your lease on half of my shop will be 10,000 eris! Or you can pay 100,000 eris annually and save 16.6666666667%!"

This doesn't sound like good business talk...

But whatever.

"I'll pay for this year and the next year in advance."

I handed her 200,000 eris in coins.

"Wow, I didn't think you were that rich, Kazuma-san. Where did you get the money from?"

"From my bounty with the fight against Beldia, but I had to pay a huge compensation for the damage I recklessly caused. Speaking of Beldia, why didn't you help the town out when he arrived?"

"Huh? O-Oh, w-well you see. Beldia and I used to work together. I'm one of the 8th Demon King generals."

"Aha! I knew it! Substantial evidence to be sent to the realm of the dead!"

Aqua was about to pounce on Wiz but Kiritsu managed to stop her in her tracks, hitting her on the head for disrupting the business meeting.

"Hey, was this because I insulted you back at the horse stables before? Quit hitting me, I am your creator! I made you into what you are!"

While Aqua and Kiritsu commenced their climactic final battle, reminiscent of Dr. Frankenstein and his creation, Wiz and I continued our conversation about Beldia.

"He did mention that he refrained from destroying the whole town because he heard that you resided there."

"R-Really? I was asked to do my work on the Demon King's shield barrier to live a peaceful life. So, Beldia did acknowledge his promise, sort of... That's good."

"You're making him sound like a good guy, even though he would've used my head as a lantern for his minions."

"M-My apologies. H-He really wasn't a great guy nor a companion at all. In the castle, he would 'accidentally' roll his head underneath my skirt while breathing heavily not out of tiredness but something else... He'd also drown his own head in my bathtub whenever I tried to take my bath. And sometimes he would just straight up throw his head at my chest and say 'Dodgeball! I'm in!' and a lot more that I really don't want to talk about..."

And this guy talked about having honor in battle...

"R-Right. Anyway, there are a bunch of things I want to add to your shop. It'll also make you gain a lot more attraction from customers, and maybe they'll buy something from your products."

"Really? That sounds like good business talk!"

It sure is.

For about half an hour, I shared all my thoughts, and Wiz agreed to them without any hesitation surprisingly.

Maybe all my good ideas were actually bright and profitable.

During the week-long time-skip, I brainstormed and recruited some workers from the construction site who wanted a part-time job, as well as some clients like the farmer lady from a week ago, into my business idea.

I called it... Satou Industries...!

I had already considered other names such as Satou Drop or Amazuma, among others, but Satou Industries takes the cake.

Basically, it's a company that provides a delivery service for people who need it.

Do you want to order your favorite groceries but it's too far from your house to walk?

I've already hired the workers from the construction site to build six small shops in the town of Axel, strategically located in high-traffic areas.

Customers can visit these small establishments to purchase the service of our workers, who will purchase groceries on their behalf and deliver them to their designated house addresses.

I wish the internet existed in this world, but you can't always expect life to serve a nice cream pie.

The construction of the buildings alone costed about 400,000 eris, and I needed an additional 200,000 eris to pay the workers. So, I essentially spent a total of 600,000 eris on this endeavor alone.

I've also brought in some clients, including the farmer lady who wants her crops delivered to interested buyers.

Furthermore, there's a local blacksmith who's partnered with me.

He's arranged for his weapons to be delivered to customers outside of town using my workers. He would cover travel expenses while I covered the labor cost and we would both receive our share of the profits. He also said he'll pay me to have the weapons he desires delivered to him.

There are a few other partnerships I've secured, but some of the negotiations were quite challenging, to say the least.

In essence, Wiz's shop serves as the central hub for all these operations, where the magic really happens.

All I need now is to find someone willing to take on the role of accountant and handle the business deals on my behalf.

N-Not that I'm being lazy; I came up with this idea, so I'm the true owner, after all.

And then there's the looming task of developing an advertising campaign for the future...

Oh, and let's not forget about taxes... darn taxes...

"Welp, Aqua and I are off. Thanks, Wiz. I'm looking forward to getting everything settled."

"Goodbye! Oh wait, before you leave, let me give you a small gift as a token of gratitude for saving me from Aqua-sama's divinity. People from the Axis Cult are really scary people..."

"What did you say?!"

The door swings open, revealing a concerned elderly man who looks like a seasoned business owner.

"Excuse me! Is Wiz-san here?"

...

"That's quite a sum of money you made from betting on Darkness."

Megumin remarked as she eyed the bulging money bag I carried, my other hand clutching a bag of my belongings.

"Indeed! Darkness, keep participating in those arm wrestling matches for me, and I'll be rolling in wealth before you know it!"

"While I don't condone betting or gambling... It's one of the reason why the economic structure of this world is still standing. But if we're gonna be doing this together, you should give me a fair share of my money. After all, I do the heavy lifting for you,"

Oh right, I am a man of my words that will reward anyone who contributed.

"Here ya go, Darkness."

"Thank you."

Aqua promptly took half of the money from my bag and handed it over to her, leaving me slightly flabbergasted.

"Hey, how did you do that?! Why do you keep doing that?!"

"Let's pause our squabbling for a moment and appreciate this magnificent mansion that we've rightfully earned by defeating Beldia..."

Before I could further berate Aqua, it was the young girl, Megumin, who displayed a surprising degree of maturity, effectively quelling our bickering.

The elderly man who had sought out Wiz had a special request: he wanted the spirits haunting this mansion to be exorcised.

In return for our services, he offered us free accommodation for the winter. However, once winter passed, we would have to pay to continue living here.

I had a plan to utilize the money I'd earned from my betting activities to cover the costs and secure this mansion for ourselves.

"Indeed, Megumin, this mansion fulfills my needs as both a goddess and Archpriest! With these titles, I'm practically an anti-undead expert! Watch this..."

Aqua extended both her hands outward, and they began to emit a soft yellow glow.

"Fufu, I can see it, I can see it! With my spiritual eyes, I see the noble who dallied with a maid, and the child born of that union, kept here as the noble clan's illegitimate offspring. The noble succumbed to illness, the maid disappeared, and the young girl left behind contracted the same ailment as her father, passing away without ever laying eyes on her parents. Her name was Anna Filante Asteroid. She cherished her dolls and tales of adventurers! But fear not, this spirit won't play pranks on us. She poses no threat! Ara, despite her youth, she had a taste for mature things like fine wine. Let's prepare some wine as an offering!" Aqua proclaimed.

What on earth...

The rest of us entered the mansion, where Aqua continued to spout all sorts of nonsense.

"I see an old man, once a famous fortuneteller who predicted his own demise! He tripped on his own pearl necklace, stumbled, and the back of his head collided with his own magical crystal orb! He's currently proclaiming... 'I can see the future! That young boy will eventually make a move on one of you girls! Stay away from him! He poses a great danger to all females!'. As if I'd allow that to happen! I'll cast a curse on him before he even gets the chance!"

"I see another old man priest! Why are all these people just filthy old men looking at Darkness's chest lustfully? Hey, quit touching yourself in front of the child! Stay by me, Anna, I'll protect you from them!"

"Oh hey there, little boy! What's your name? ...You're going to make Darkness and Kazuma do WHAT?! Come here; let me give you a talking-to! Darn, he ran away! Darkness, Kazuma, be cautious of a young boy who wants to get you both alone together!"

"Finally, a woman! Ugh, it's just an old woman. Hey, quit trying to hit me! You can't touch me! Hey, who are you calling an old hag?! I'm 14,600 years old and have aged better than your own wrinkles! You wanna go?! Step aside, Anna, things might get messy... Bring it on, grandma!"

As the night settled, we removed our equipment and made ourselves comfortable in the mansion.

We had already determined the room assignments and placed our luggage accordingly.

It appeared that the girls had already organized the household chores...

"Aqua will take care of cleaning the toilets and preparing the bathwater for us. I'll handle washing and putting away the dishes. Darkness will handle all the cooking. Kazuma will cover the mansion's expenses himself. Alright, I think we've got some chores sorted out; we can tackle the rest tomorrow morning. I'm feeling pretty drained."

Megumin announced, stretching her limbs and letting out a tired yawn.

"So, who's going to be responsible for the laundry?"

Darkness inquired, looking at the rest of us.

The girls exchanged glances, then turned their eyes toward me...

"We'll handle our own laundry."
"We'll handle our own laundry."
"We'll handle our own laundry."

"What do you all take me for?"

I protested before arguing with them for a good minute.

I claimed the largest room on the second floor of the mansion and settled in for a sound night's sleep.

Aqua would now be staying in this mansion, and I held onto the faint hope that her presence might lead to the exorcism of any malevolent spirits that might still linger.

However, I couldn't help but worry that her divine aura might attract even more spirits and undead to the place.

During that week-long time-skip, we encountered another lich similar to Wiz and learned that Aqua's divine aura indeed attracted spirits and undead.

She was basically like catnip for the undead.

Well, it seemed we were in for a penny, in for a pound.

...

I woke up in the middle of the night, my bladder urgently calling for a trip to the toilet.

The mansion was enveloped in silence, indicating that it was quite late.

As I attempted to rise from the bed, I found that my body wouldn't budge.

Panic set in; was this sleep paralysis?

I tried to make a sound, but only a feeble mumble escaped my lips. I couldn't even call out for Aqua's help.

The realization of the dire situation hit me.

Correction: my desperate need to urinate faced an unprecedented crisis.

No, I had to endure this; I was already a full grown man!

Unable to move my body, I clenched my teeth in an effort to hold it in.

At that moment, a noise emanated from a corner of my room.

Pop.

In the otherwise quiet room, it sounded incredibly loud.

I shifted my gaze toward the source of the sound, and there, in the corner of the room, stood a tiny doll of a girl in a dress.

Why had it suddenly appeared here?

"Eek!"

I turned to the wall, squeezing my eyes shut, cold sweat breaking out.

What was happening? Why was this doll here?

I had no recollection of it being in the room in the first place.

Did Aqua put it here to scare me? Yes, that must be it. It had to be.

That utterly useless goddess; I'd deal with her tomorrow. I blamed Aqua and shut my eyes tightly, seeking refuge from the bizarre reality.

Bang.

A deafening sound reverberated throughout the room, causing me to break out in a cold sweat.

Yes, I couldn't simply blame everything on Aqua; it was too pathetic to do so.

Yeah, that's right, that girl also had her moments of hard work, so I should be kind to her from time to time.

Bang.

After all, she was a goddess-sama, right?

Yes, indeed, a goddess was residing in this mansion.

Evil spirits? Those creatures would be vanquished instantly if they crossed paths with Aqua. Our Aqua was a goddess who could effortlessly purify a lich!

Clank.

Clank.

Clank–!

I would apologize to Aqua for the incident in the morning. I had been far too disrespectful to a goddess. I needed to reflect on my behavior, definitely.

Clank clank clank clank clank clank clank clank clank, clank clank clank clank!

Ahhhhhh, I would absolutely apologize and turn over a new leaf!

I would apologize, so Aqua, please come to my aid!

I wasn't certain if my confession and prayers had any effect, but the sounds from the corner of the room ceased.

That was a relief; there were no such things as spirits, after all.

I relaxed a bit.

Simultaneously, a certain curiosity began to creep over me.

Should I open my eyes?

I wanted to open my eyes and inspect the situation with that doll.

However, some instinct or sixth sense held me back.

What should I do? It was a dilemma. It would be frightening to open my eyes, but it was also unsettling to keep them shut!

After contemplating for a moment, I realized that if this continued, I wouldn't make it to the toilet.

So, I mustered the courage to crack my eyes open slightly...

And there, I locked eyes with the doll, which was staring right at my face.

"Hyaaa!"

I screamed, feeling as if I had drained every ounce of courage from my psyche, and swatted the doll away the moment I regained control of my body.

"Aqua! Aqua, save me!"

I bolted towards Aqua's room, but a cluster of dolls had positioned themselves in front of it, thwarting my progress as if they had anticipated my next move.

Every path seemed blocked until I reached the living room.

"Puahahaha! Look at Kazuma's terrified face! I bet he nearly wet himself!" Aqua, Megumin, and Darkness were all seated on the living room floor around a lantern, chuckling heartily.

I had spent a good five minutes fleeing for my life.

Exhausted and too tired to argue, I took a quick sip of water and reluctantly joined them.

"Great job waking him up, Anna. Now that we're all here, you can reveal yourselves!"

As she spoke, numerous ghostly figures manifested themselves.

People I had never seen or heard of in my life.

A bunch of old men.

A family of five.

An angry old lady.

A little girl.

And all other ghost figures that were too blurry to be recognize but I was aware of their presence.

"Hey, Aqua, where did the little ghost boy that I saw in my room go? I chased after him but he always ended up going to Kazuma's room."

"Stay away from that boy, Darkness! I'm warning you!"

"But he looks so adorable and innocent. His laughter fills my heart with warmth and affection."

I glanced at Megumin, who seemed to share my traumatized expression, except her eyes were glowing a peculiar shade of crimson for some reason.

"You encountered the dolls too?"

"Y-Yes... They kept banging on the floor and creaking over to stare at me... Aqua said it was just a prank, but as a little girl- I mean, a young woman, it had quite an effect on me... I think I need to use the restroom."

I recalled that Crimson Demons were not supposed to need the bathroom. Perhaps that's a measure of how frightened Megumin was.

Once everything settled down, Aqua made an announcement:

"After chatting with all the spirits, I've grown too attached to them to exorcise them. So they'll all be living with us!"

"What?!"
"What?!"

Megumin and I exclaimed in unison.

"Relax, you two. I told Anna to stop playing pranks on both of you. She won't do it anymore. As for the others... I can't guarantee your safety from them..."

"A-Aqua... these old men, especially the elderly priest, are looking at me the way Kazuma does when he sees me..."

Hey!

"Don't worry about them, Darkness. I've issued a restraining order in your name against them. They won't be allowed within 10 feet of you, or they'll be instantly purified."

"That doesn't help much since my room is larger than 10 feet..."

"Rejoice, young lady! I am a priest who suppressed my desires for the sake of reaching Heaven, but I failed the moment I... accidentally... touched a pregnant woman inappropriately on my first day. However, now that I'm a ghost, I can fulfill my desires to the fullest without any setbacks!"

First day? Accidentally?

"I am an elderly man with expertise in fortunetelling... Beware of the young boy who plans to sniff your laundry when you're all away from the mansion, and he's alone..."

The girls stared at me with disgust.

"H-Hey, do you all actually believe him?! How could he predict that? Do you want to look into my future? Where do you see me in the next few minutes?"

I decided to test the old man's resolve as he peered into his mystical orb.

"Dead."

"Next person!"

The little blonde girl seemed too shy to speak and vanished, while the elderly lady adamantly refused to speak, seemingly angry at Aqua for some reason.

We then turned our attention to the ghostly family of five.

"I am the beautiful wife of this family. This is my husband; he may appear unsightly to all of you, but he's handsome in my eyes! And these are my three lovely triplets—Ab, Abby, and Abbygail!"

"Mommy, I wanted to introduce myself!"
"Yeah, mommy! Why do you always spoil our fun?"
"I need to use the bathroom, mommy!"

"Honey, I'm not ugly in their eyes! How could you say that?!"

The three little girls and their father kept pestering their mother until she grew weary of it.

"QUIET!"

Her sudden outburst caught everyone, including us, off guard.

In all our eyes, she was undoubtedly the woman of the house.

Afterward, she swiftly regained her composure and remarked:

"Now then, in response to all four of you... Mommy does as she pleases. I gave birth to each of you, so I get to decide what I want."

"But I didn't come out of your-"

"Dear... another word, and I'll rip it off..."

"Yes, ma'am!"
"Yes, ma'am!"

I involuntarily responded, even though those words weren't directed at me. I was genuinely intimidated by what she said.

"Now then... let me vent about my co-worker's horrendous work ethics!"

"Honey, I don't think we should discuss that topic in front of the children..."

"Oh, hush, Dear. Must I remind you of the way you stared at her when she visited our house for dinner that one time!"

"Well I am a simple man! If anyone dresses like that, they better expect me to keep staring!"

I can relate.

"How dare you! And you said to keep the topic away from our beautiful children... How disloyal are you to your faithful wife...! I am simply heartbroken!"

The wife began to shed ghostly tears, even though she was a spirit.

"Honey... I'm sorry. It was just a spur-of-the-moment..."

"I...I want a divorce!"

Oh my...

"A-A divorce?! Have you lost your mind?! I was the only man who stood by you when you were at your lowest! All my friends told me what a terrible person you were, but I remained loyal and was proven right in the end!"

"We don't need to bring that up, Dear... But I still want a divorce..."

"Honey... If that's your final decision... Then I have no choice but to respect it. I love you... Even if you take the kids away from me... I'll still love you and them, no matter what..."

The wife's tears now seemed to be tears of joy.

"It looks like I still love you after all! Let's remarry!"

"Oh, honey!"

The couple embraced in what seemed like a melodramatic scene from a romantic comedy.

"Sniff... Here's your tissue, Aqua."

"Thanks, Megumin... Sniff..."

Darkness, who had remained silent throughout the exchange, finally spoke up.

"For a family of five... you guys sure died happily..."

The mother gave her a concerned look:

"We didn't die in this mansion... We just came to check it out, but we couldn't leave because of the-"

"Alright! I can't take it anymore! If all of you want to live in this mansion, then I expect compensation! I demand a few panties under my pillow once a week as payment! I want my meals served by the wife in a maid costume. I'd like the father to maintain my blade, and the three little girls should call me 'Onii-chan' every day! As for the rest... leave!"

"But we can't..."

The elderly priest continued to protest.

The elderly fortuneteller approached me, pointing his finger in my direction.

"Boy, allow me to read the future of your blade... I sense that it has its own sentience..."

Kiritsu, without my command, emerged from my room and flew toward the elderly fortuneteller.

"Hey, I didn't tell you to come out."

"Ah yes... Let's see... Nope, can't see the future of this sword. Useless..."

Kiritsu attempted to attack the elderly fortuneteller with a sideways slash, but it proved ineffective.

So it couldn't harm ghosts or spirits... That was the extent of my power...

"Look, mommy, it's a little stick!"
"Haha, that twig can't defeat the old man!"
"Mom, I really have to use the bathroom...! Actually, never mind..."

We all observed as Kiritsu futilely tried to attack the young ghost triplets.

And that was my cue to leave.

"I'm going to the bathroom..."

I stormed off, making my way toward the bathroom door.

I pushed open the bathroom door and encountered a massive dark figure blocking my path.

Thinking it was another prank by the ghost girl, I tried to move it aside, but it wouldn't budge.

I entered the bathroom and glanced up at the towering figure.

"Woah...! Damn...!"

It wasn't a gigantic doll after all...

I couldn't see the entire creature due to the darkness, but its eyes glowed a menacing red, much like Megumin's.

It emitted a low, guttural growl, sending shivers down my spine.

"I'm sorry, sir. I thought this was the bathroom. Hehe... I'm sorry."

I nervously laughed and patted the gigantic figure on his abdomen.

Just to give you a sense of how tall it was, I reached as high as I could to touch its abdomen.

I turned around to walk back to the circle, but the ominous figure suddenly grabbed the collar of my shirt and lifted me up, much like one of those high school bullies.

"Aqua-sama... I've got a big problem..."

Aqua squinted her eyes, trying to determine if the figure behind me was real.

Megumin looked like she was about to be sick, and Darkness covered her mouth in horror.

"This demon is on all types of steroids. He's taller than Beldia, and I think he's much stronger than him. And I believe he's going to take my soul- AAAAAHHHHH!"

The huge demon threw me toward Darkness, but she swiftly dodged, causing me to collide head-on with Aqua.

The blurry ghost figures disappeared from the living room in fear, while the main ones remained.

"Ah, there he is. That's the bully who's preventing us from leaving! Dear, go fight him for me!"

"I can't do anything! He'll send me to hell and I won't be able to see my loving family again!"

"Why did I even marry you..."

"Don't say that in front of our children! Wait, where are they...? Honey, we lost them!"

While the couple were arguing once more,

"Aqua... are you okay?"

I quickly got off of her, only to see that she was knocked unconscious.

Of all times for her to be useful, she was out cold!

I had no choice but to rely on...

"Mommy, look, the stick is trying to attack us!"
"Hahaha! Nananabooboo, you can't hit us!
"Actually, I think I need to use the bathroom now."

Kiritsu, ignoring the demon that had nearly killed me, was still prioritizing hurting the little girls who were mocking him, even the one who needed to use the bathroom.

Probably because they all looked the same.

"Why did I expect any usefulness from this weapon? Never mind that... Darkness, do your best to keep the demon away while I try to wake up Aqua."

"Got it!"

Darkness followed my instructions and engaged the demon in battle, wearing nothing but her... loose nightgown.

Stay focused, Kazuma, stay focused.

"Aqua, wake up! That demon is going to take us all to hell if you don't wake up!"

"Young boy... allow me to read your future...!"

"Now is not the time for that!"

"That's it, woman! Keep fighting the demon and let it tear off your nightgown little by little!"

The elderly priest seemed to be enjoying the fight too much.

"Megumin, you're a Crimson Demon, right? How do you say 'surrender' in demon language?"

"I find the idea that we Crimson Demons are similar to demons to be repulsive, Kazuma. Also, Darkness looks like she's about to gas out."

Eventually, even Darkness couldn't hold back the demon's sheer strength without proper armor and a sword.

The demon kicked her, breaking her guard, and sent her flying towards the kitchen, rendering her unconscious.

"Aqua, you have to wake up! Please! Or else I'll tear off your pajamas and defile your body as we speak! If I'm going to die, I'm not going to die a virgin!"

Still no response.

She truly was unconscious... Damn it!

"Leave it to me!"

"Megumin, I knew I could rely on you!"

Yeah, it wasn't very manly to rely on a young girl to save us, but she was built different.

"Fufu... a match between a demon and a Crimson Demon... Finally, a worthy opponent! Our battle will be legendary! We Crimson Demons possess immense physical strength, and we are not to be underestimated!"

Megumin and the demon slowly approached each other.

"Shall we exchange our rush attacks...?"

Instead of a rush attack, they locked hands, testing their strength.

Surprisingly, Megumin was holding her ground, being pushed back only slightly.

But then the demon grabbed Megumin by her slender waist, hoisted her high above its head, and...

"Whoop-!"

...threw her out of the window, sending her tumbling into the front yard.

News Flash: Just because you possess incredible strength doesn't mean you're heavy to lift.

The demon, having dispatched both Darkness and Megumin with astonishing ease, slowly turned its attention toward me.

"Eek! Curse that old fortuneteller and his predictions! If I'm going to meet my end, I'd at least like to share my first kiss with someone else, preferably not Aqua."

My other options were...

"Fear not! I'll try to rewrite your fortune, young boy so you won't die!"

"Hey, take off that woman's shirt for me, boy."

What is going on at this point?

This was a simple exorcise quest, now turned into a deadly juggernaut gamemode.

"Aqua! Please wake up! Darkness is unconscious, and Megumin just got thrown out of the window! We're in serious trouble! I haven't done anything to deserve going to hell! I'm too handsome to die! If you wake up, I'll even give you a monthly allowance!"

"Leave it to me!"

Aqua woke up, winked at me, and chanted,

"Sacred Exorcism!"

"AHHHHH!"

The demon let out a blood-curdling scream before vanishing into a bright white light.

The ghosts watched in awe while I couldn't help but feel like Aqua had faked being unconscious to get what she wanted...

Aqua then went on to heal Darkness's wounds and wake her up.

Megumin returned to the mansion with only a few scratches, which Aqua promptly healed.

"Thank you, for freeing us from that demon. Now we can live in this mansion peacefully..."

The old priest said.

"Don't you mean 'leave the mansion'? Also, one more glance at Darkness and you're done for."

I responded.

"It seems my fortune-telling was correct all along. You didn't die at all, as predicted."

"Okay, I've had enough of your 'fortune-telling,' old geezer! We all know it's fake! Stop trying to save your image, or else I'll bribe my Archpriest to send you to Heaven!"

"B-But it's true! I can read the future! I'll admit, I couldn't see your future because, for some reason, it was blank, so I just made it up without much thought. Same as with your sword. But the others, I could read clearer than my shiny bald head. Though I won't reveal them without any form of currency."

"You're already dead! How could money be of any use to you!"

"Now, now, it's going to be hard to get used to having spirits live with you, but I think it would give us some more company."

Aqua was still onto the idea that humans and spirits can live together peacefully.

Megumin and Darkness remained skeptical about the idea.

"Here, let's all head to my room and have some wine to discuss everything about it. We have all night to talk it over. Trust me, in the future, you'll all say, 'Aqua-sama was right. As expected of her wisdom as a goddess.' Come!"

All of us, including the ghosts, followed Aqua to her room.

"I've been saving a portion of my money until I finally had my own room. So prepare to be amazed... by my wine collection!"

She opened the door to her room.

We were greeted by the sight of six empty wine bottles laid out on the floor.

"Aqua... I think someone drank all your wine."

Darkness uttered.

"Eh? What?! Nooo! My wine! Don't worry, mommy is here! I'll save you all!"

She picked up each bottle, only to find them all empty.

"S-Someone drank them all! Wahhhh! It's all empty! Wahhhhh!"

I would have felt bad, but she tricked me into giving her a monthly allowance, so...

"Who did it?! Who drank all my wine?! I know it wasn't Kazuma because he doesn't have the balls to enter my room and make a move on me!"

"Hey!"

"Wasn't me. Even though I'm at the right age to be considered an adult, I didn't even know you had a wine collection to begin with."

"I don't drink much, Aqua. So please don't accuse me of doing it."

If it wasn't any of us... then who was it...?

We all turned our attention to the guilty spirits, who were nervously scratching their heads and whistling, even the three little girls.

The old priest finally explained:

"Yeah... the angry old woman convinced us all to drink all your wine for insulting her. We were all hesitant at first, so we tried a small sip, and it was really good, so we all ended up drinking it all before we knew it."

The silence between Aqua and the spirits grew...

.

.

.

"Turn Undead! Turn Undead! Turn Undead! Turn Undead! Turn Undead! Turn Undead! Turn Undead! Turn Undead!"

Oh, the horror.

The spirits of the two old men were sent straight to heaven, followed by the angry old woman, then the mother, then the father, and finally, the three little girls...!

To think that the goddess Aqua wouldn't even blink an eye towards children!

Aqua rushed out of her room to purify the remaining spirits in the mansion.

"Oh yeah, Kazuma, don't you need to use the bathroom?" Megumin asked me.

"Oh right, I forgot. I'm going to the bathroom and then going to sleep."

I walked away, leaving Aqua to exorcise the spirits.

Darkness then asked Megumin,

"Hey, where did the little ghost boy go?"

...

The morning after I had a stern conversation with a certain Archpriest about her neglect of her duties as an actual goddess, I found myself occupied with the task of cleaning a tomb, a request from the landlord.

In exchange, he had promised to lower our rent once winter ended.

"Kazuma-san, morning! Are you cleaning the tomb?"

As I knelt near the tomb, tending to the overgrown grass, a voice called out to me from behind.

I turned to see Wiz, who appeared much better than she had the day before.

"Are you all right? I'm sorry that idiot caused you so much trouble yesterday.".

"Don't worry. In fact, I'm glad things were resolved this way. She definitely won't be lonely now."

Wiz replied with a smile.

For some reason, Wiz looked genuinely pleased to see me working diligently.

Just as I was about to invite her inside for a rest, Wiz mentioned that she needed to attend to her shop and bid me farewell before leaving.

I couldn't help but wonder why Wiz had come here. Had she become concerned about us and decided to check in?

I poured water over the tombstone and carefully cleaned it.

As I worked, I could make out some faint words inscribed on the tombstone.

These had to be the name of the person resting here, though it was difficult to read.

Though unclear, I could decipher the name 'Anna.'

Anna... Anna...? Who was that? I felt like I had heard that name somewhere recently...

As I contemplated this in front of the tombstone, a shout echoed from the mansion.

"Kazuma! Lunch is ready! Come quickly! If you don't come now, your food will get cold!"

It was Aqua, sticking her head out of the mansion window, waving and shouting.

"I know, just give me a moment! I'll be right there!"

After responding, I used a cloth to wipe down the tombstone, finishing up the cleaning. The name 'Anna Filante Asteroid' was prominently displayed on the tombstone.

I was certain I had heard this name before...

"Kazuma! Megumin says that for every minute you're late, there'll be one less piece of fried meat! Take your time; you don't need to rush. Our lunch will be even more abundant that way."

"Wait for me! How could you brutes do that?!"

With the tombstone cleaned, I ran toward the mansion to enjoy the rewarding lunch.

...

We had acquired ourselves a mansion, which meant that my concerns about making it through the winter were alleviated.

Our party of four wasted no time moving in, despite the various issues that came with living under the same roof as members of the opposite sex.

Nonetheless, I couldn't help but feel content with my new life here.

However, on the very first day of our new life in the mansion, a problem reared its head.

Winter brought with it powerful monsters that made venturing outside town a risky endeavor, much to the dismay of the girls, although it didn't bother me as much.

I had plans for a business project, but I had prioritized the construction of my 6 small shops that I hadn't considered how winter might interfere with it.

I wasn't a harsh boss, and the construction workers had other part-time jobs that allowed them to stay warm and keep their hands from freezing. So, I decided to dismiss them until winter was officially over.

But just because it was winter didn't mean I intended to laze around on the couch.

I needed to brainstorm my next steps, considering that I was just winging it with the contribution of my luck stat.

First, I needed to persuade the blue-haired girl on the couch to move so I could laze around the couch.

"Hey, move away. I'm trying to brainstorm, and I might need the table in front of the couch. If you're feeling cold, go back to your room and snuggle under your blanket."

"I don't want to. Things like blankets turn cold once you leave them. If you want me to go back to my blanket, heat it up in a microwave first."

"Are you an idiot? There's no such thing as a microwave here! Stop being stubborn and move. If you keep getting in my way, don't blame me if I get a bit forceful."

"What, you want to fight? If we're both unarmed, I have the advantage with my higher stats. This area in front of the fireplace is my sacred sanctuary. Anyone who trespasses will face divine retribution! Ahhh!"

After I administered the divine punishment known as the "Freeze" on Aqua's neck, she screamed and tumbled off the couch she had been hogging.

I settled onto the now-vacant couch and placed the materials I had in my hands on the table.

"This is my territory now. If you're not going to help with work, be a good girl and entertain yourself with those two over there."

I waved my hand dismissively at Aqua, who was shivering on the carpet, as if to chase her away.

In the middle of the living room, Darkness and Megumin were deeply engrossed in a board game that resembled chess or shogi.

"Hmph, witness the power of my army. I'll teleport my orc soldier to this space."

"Megumin, the way you use your mage is unconventional... I'll move my Crusader here, check!"

"Teleport."

Unlike Earth, this world had the concept of magic, and the rules of this game, though reminiscent of chess, had some unique twists.

I had played with Megumin once, but the moment she teleported her king from the board, I vowed never to engage in that particular board game again.

"Meow!"

"Chirp! Chirp!"

We also had another pet in the mansion, a black cat that Megumin had brought in, with an even stranger name than the one she gave to my sword.

Technically, we now had two pets in the mansion, as Kiritsu, the sentient sword, liked to fly around the mansion and spend time with the other three girls, especially Darkness.

The black cat was enthusiastically cheering for Megumin to win, while Kiritsu was vocally supporting Darkness.

I didn't mind having pets, as long as they weren't larger than a family dog and as dangerous than a starving wolf.

Suddenly, Aqua, who had been nursing her neck while shivering, appeared to recall something.

She stood up abruptly, producing her own adventurer's card and thrusting it in my face.

"Kazuma, take a good look at the level column! I currently have the highest level among the four of us. With such a high level, I could be considered a veteran! You rookies who are below level 20, know your place! If you understand, then vacate the spot in front of the fireplace for the great me!"

I glanced at the card she presented, and indeed, her level had experienced a remarkable increase, currently standing at 21.

Upon reflection, she had defeated the demon army's boss, Beldia, and purified numerous undead monsters in the dungeon. She had even managed to purify a lich in the end. As well as exorcising that demon who appeared out of nowhere.

The origin of that demon has yet to be explained since Wiz and the landlord were unaware of it's presence.

A theory I had in mind was that the demon had been there for centuries, slowly but surely corrupting the lives of anyone who lived there to cause mayhem and without leaving a single trace of evidence.

But oh well, while I was pleased to see Aqua's growth, I couldn't help but feel a tinge of frustration that her level had surpassed mine...

Hmm?

"Hey, Aqua. Your level did increase, but your stats remain the same as when I first saw them. What's the reason for that?"

"How ignorant, Kazuma. Who do you think I am? My stats were already at the maximum from the very beginning. I had an abundance of skill points right from the start, enough to learn all the banquet party tricks and acquire all the skills of an Archpriest. Comparing me to a typical adventurer is a big mistake."

Hearing Aqua's explanation, I dropped her card and slumped onto the carpet. Although she wore a smug smile at my reaction, I didn't have the energy to engage with her further.

This meant that no matter how much Aqua leveled up, her intelligence wouldn't increase. I sighed, picked up her card, returned it to her, and even gave up my spot in front of the fireplace.

Aqua, still reveling in her victory, remarked,

"Oh? Why did you give up your spot so easily... Kazuma, why are you crying? Did my level surpassing yours shock you so much? Why are you patting my shoulders and treating me with such gentleness? Why do you look at me with pity?"

I guided Aqua to the place in front of the fireplace and resignedly accepted that I wouldn't be getting any work done today.

"That was a good game, Megumin. Well played."

"Tough luck, not even a Crusader like you can survive my Destroyer Explosion!"

"Well, if we're talking about luck, how about this other board game I bought from Wiz? It was the only one in stock because she claims it was from another world which I find it really hard to believe. It's called Monopoly."

My ears picked up at what Darkness had just said.

I turned to see the infamous Monopoly board game, known for breaking families apart.

"Hey, do you mind if I join the two of you?"

I settled in between them, eyeing the nostalgic Monopoly board.

"Oh? Why the change of heart? I thought you didn't want to play any more board games after losing to me so quickly. Or maybe you're a masochist and you love the feeling of complete failure."

"Don't underestimate him, Megumin. Despite his average appearance, games such as this are his domain."

...

After getting kicked out of the mansion for obliterating the two girls with high taxes, rising rent, and ridiculous water and electricity bills, I decided to walk around the cold harsh weather to see what was going on in town.

The town had already succumbed to snowfall, and the bitter cold had driven most people indoors. It was common sense in this world to hibernate during winter.

The only beings active during this season were the ruthless monsters.

The only exceptions were those who hailed from Japan, blessed with cheat-like abilities, who dared to venture out on quests.

In this frigid weather, the only souls roaming the streets were either idlers like myself or familiar faces who stood out like sore thumbs.

The blonde one was Dust, and the dark-haired individual was Keith.

I had encountered these two, along with their respective party members, the day after completing the grueling Warthog quest.

The encounter unfolded something like this:

---

"Repeat what you just said."

It was the day after my manhood was restored back to original.

"I'll say it again as many times as you want. You've got a whole party filled with advanced classes, and yet you're holding them back by keeping them in a beginner town like Axel. It must be quite frustrating for them to wait for their low-level Adventurer to catch up."

The man replied, clearly intoxicated and speaking his mind without restraint.

I don't know what it was like to be drunk because being drunk was the bottom of my bucket list in this horrible world.

I could trip and hit my head on the tip of the sword without noticing.

"Kazuma, his insults aren't worth the breath he's wasting." Megumin reassured me.

"Yeah, ignore him, Kazuma. He's just a random drunkard. I've had my fair share of encounters with people like him." Darkness chimed in.

"Pehe! He's just jealous that you've got three strong and beautiful party members!" Aqua added with a hint of pride.

It felt slightly satisfying to witness Dust's surprised reaction when the three girls defended me, but it wasn't enough for my taste.

I decided to take advantage of his inebriated state and thoroughly humiliate him with his next foolish words.

"I-I see that you've already expanded your harem to this extent. But that won't make me back down. How's about a switch?"

"I'll gladly switch!"

I shouted out loud.

"Huh...?"

The drunkard harassing me held his beer with one hand, making an awkward sound.

"I said that I would switch with you! You think I'm a pushover because I didn't say anything, right? Ahhh, that's right, I have the weakest job! I'm fine with that. But you! What did you say after that, you jerk!?"

"Ka... Kazuma?"

Aqua timidly approached me as I suddenly got agitated.

Before Aqua could say anything further, the man who had backed off slightly due to my sudden outburst began to explain.

"After that part? Um, bringing three pretty ladies and creating a harem..."

I slammed my fist on the table, causing everyone in the guild to tremble at the sound.

"Pretty ladies!? Harem!? You said harem!? Hey, are your eyes made of glass or something?! Where are these pretty ladies?! My vision might not be great, but I don't see any pretty ladies here! Why don't you swap your glass eyes for my lousy ones!"

"Us?"
"Us?"
"Us?"

The three girls, upon hearing my words, pointed at themselves in astonishment.

"Hey, you! Tell me! Pretty ladies? Where are they!? You said you envied me, right? Huh? You said that, right!?"

While I had the man by the collar, a timid voice came from behind me.

"Well... About that..."

The soft voice belonged to Aqua, who was representing all three of them and raising her hand. However, I ignored her and continued my tirade.

"And after that? Being surrounded by top-tier classes is so blissful? How envious it is to not know suffering!?"

"Um, well, sorry... The alcohol got to my head... But! The grass might look greener on the other side, but your situation is better! You said you want to switch with me, right? Just one day. How about swapping roles for a single adventure? Hey, are you guys okay with that?"

The man whose collar I had grabbed turned to his companions for confirmation.

"I-I'm fine with that... The quest today is just hunting goblins."

"I'm okay with it too. But Dust, don't say you don't want to rejoin the party because it's too comfortable there, all right?"

"I have no problems either. Even with a rookie, goblins are no big deal. As compensation, I hope you bring back some great stories."

His companions chimed in, showing their agreement.

"Hey, Kazuma. Um, you guys seemed to be chatting happily, but aren't you going to ask for our opinion?"

Aqua interjected.

"No. Hello, my name is Kazuma. It might just be one day, but please take care of me!"

I replied with a casual wave, dismissing their input.

"Ah, okay..."

The three companions of the troublemaker awkwardly acknowledged my decision.

As night fell, the troublemaker begged to have his original party back.

It turned out that Megumin had used her Explosion magic just to show off, Darkness had removed her armor and struggled to hit her target, which happened to be a Rookie Killer and not the goblins, and Aqua had slipped on some slippery mud, allowing the Rookie Killer to gnaw at the top of her head.

Satisfied with the outcome, I swiftly emptied Dust's wallet in exchange for him being allowed to switch back to his original party.

---

Back to where we were, as I spotted these two acquaintances eyeing a shop suspiciously, I called out to them.

"Keith, Dust, what are you doing here?"

"Woah!"

Startled by my sudden appearance and call, Keith and Dust jumped.

They were dressed casually and didn't appear to be in their adventurer attire.

"Wh-What, it's just Kazuma, don't scare us like that. Really, I hate people who use Lurk skills like this..."

Keith commented, relaxing when he realized it was me.

However, I hadn't used any Lurk skills just now.

"Hi. What's up? You're not with those three today?"

Dust asked, looking curiously in the direction of my side.

Dust had experienced quite a bit of hardship during his time with the girls, so it was natural for him to be on guard.

"Nope, it's just me today, don't worry. Are you that uncomfortable around them? I was just bored at home and decided to take a stroll. What are you guys doing here?"

Dust visibly relaxed upon hearing my response.

"No, it's... Because we... You understand? Anyway, it's fine that they're not here. In fact, it's great that there are no ladies around."

Their cryptic conversation left me curious. Did they have some secret activity they didn't want the girls to know about?

My thoughts must have shown on my face because Keith spoke up with a mischievous grin.

"Kazuma, who's usually surrounded by beauties, doesn't need such things, but for lonely men like Dust and me..."

"Hey, wait."

Dust interrupted Keith, and he gave me a look filled with sympathy.

"Keith... This guy's situation isn't what you imagined. It might look like a harem at first glance, but it's not like that... He's in the same state as us and has endured much hardship."

Dust explained, defending my situation based on his own experiences.

I could sense the understanding and empathy in his words. Ah, it seemed that Dust had a tough time himself back then.

I decided that even though we had our differences, I should treat Dust to a meal today as a gesture of goodwill.

"Right, speaking of which, what were the two of you doing there just now?"

I was genuinely curious about their hesitance to enter the shop in the alley.

Upon hearing my question, Keith and Dust exchanged a look, nodded, and then Keith put down his beer, adopting a serious expression.

"Kazuma, I think you can be trusted. What I'm about to say is a secret among the male adventurers in this town. Kazuma, can you promise never to reveal this secret to your female party members?"

Despite the heavy atmosphere, I nodded my head in agreement.

Seeing my reaction, Keith nodded as well, and Dust, despite the noise around us, lowered his voice to ensure our conversation remained private.

"Kazuma, there are succubi operating a shop in this town. You know that they specialize in gifting wonderful dreams to others, right?"

"Please tell me more."

"There's a group of succubi living in this town. This type of devil specializes in absorbing the irrepressible lust of humans, which is the energy men use to sustain themselves. Hence, male humans are an absolutely necessary existence for them."

I listened attentively to Dust's explanation, absorbing every word.

"That's why they'll absorb our energy, but... The male adventurers in this town have a relationship of mutual assistance. Think about it... We're basically staying in stables. Hence... There are many things that are hard to vent, right? With so many other adventurers sleeping around us, even if you're in the mood, you can't do 'anything' about it, right?"

"Yes, you're right."

I replied, understanding the predicament.

"But we can't lay a hand on the female adventurers sleeping near us. If you did that, you would be discovered by the other female adventurers who would gang up on you. Or your target might be hiding a dagger and you would risk getting castrated. Things like that do happen."

As he spoke, Dust's face turned pale, and he shivered with the memory of a past trauma.

Keith noticed his reaction and commented:

"Your trauma when you made a move on Lynn has not yet recovered?"

"Sh-Shut up! Like I said... At times like this, the succubi come to mind. When we're sleeping, they'll use the chance to show us a wonderful and exciting dream. We'll be refreshed, and they can sustain themselves. And they know how to hold back and won't absorb so much that we become unable to continue adventuring. I've never heard of any adventurers falling into danger because too much of their energy was taken... How about it? Everybody wins, right?"

Dust's proposal sounded like a win-win situation, and I nodded enthusiastically in agreement.

How wonderful it was to have such a solution! The succubi would have no reason to attack humans, and the adventurers in the stables would find relief.

This indirect way of venting would also contribute to a decrease in sexual crimes, and I marveled at the harmonious workings of this world.

I was truly touched by the efficiency of this system. Keith, noticing my reaction, added,

"Actually, I only heard about this shop from others recently. We were planning to visit that shop for the first time today, and then we met Kazuma."

"And that's the story... How about it? Want to go together?"

Without hesitation, I eagerly replied,

"Please bring me with you."

...

I had originally planned to spend some quality time contemplating my next business move, but the nagging distraction in my mind was becoming unbearable.

It was like an itch to your throat but you can't simply just shove your hand into your mouth to scratch it inside.

You either have to be patient and wait it out, or you could find other ways to deal with it.

I had other ways to deal with it...

"Kazuma, you're back! You're in for a treat tonight – we're having a splendid dinner! It's crab! Darkness's family sent us a gift, the incredibly extravagant Snow Crimson Crab, along with a magnificent top-class wine. They wanted to thank us for taking care of their daughter!"

Crab appeared to be a luxury item in this world as well.

Back in Japan, I had never enjoyed a proper crab meal, and I had certainly never expected to have one here.

I couldn't help but exclaim:

"Wow... In our humble adventurer's life, I never thought I'd see a Snow Crimson Crab! I'm so glad I joined this party..."

Curious about the quality of the crab, I asked, "Is the crab really that good?"

In response, Megumin, who thought I was being overly naive, raised her fist dramatically and delivered a passionate speech.

"Absolutely! Let me put it simply – if someone told me, 'You can't use Explosion until you finish this crab,' I'd endure it. I'd wait until I've had my fill of crab before unleashing Explosion. That's how valuable it is!"

"Wow, that's quite the testament... Wait, what was that last part again?"

As we chatted about various things, Darkness served the cooked crabs onto the dining table, and Aqua cheerfully brought four wine glasses to the table.

We all took a Snow Crimson Crab leg, delicately extracted the meat with white and pink stripes, dipped it in vinegar, and savored the delectable flavor.

"Ah!"

I couldn't contain my surprise at the unexpectedly delightful taste of the Snow Crimson Crab.

It had a subtle sweetness, and the rich flavor of crab meat flooded my taste buds.

Glancing at the others, I saw that all three of them were silently savoring the crab as well.

I couldn't help myself; I had to keep eating this delicious delicacy.

I deftly peeled the shell to get to the crab paste inside and was about to enjoy it when Aqua chimed in excitedly,

"Kazuma, Kazuma! Use Tinder here. I'll show you the best way to enjoy this top-class wine."

Aqua, who had finished the crab paste, arranged a small pot with charcoal and placed a wire mesh over it, effectively creating a makeshift roasting pot.

Following her instructions, I ignited the charcoal, and Aqua carefully set the shell with some remaining paste on the wire mesh.

She then poured the clear wine, resembling Japanese sake, into the shell.

With a satisfied sigh, she sipped the warm wine after slightly charring the shell over the charcoal.

"Fu..."

Her reaction made it seem like she was relishing a truly exquisite drink.

As we all watched her, captivated by her actions, it suddenly dawned on me.

This was a trap!

The crab was so unbelievably delicious that I almost forgot about the succubus-oneesan who would be visiting tonight.

She had warned me that I couldn't dream if I got too drunk.

I needed to remain composed. I prided myself on my exceptional endurance and ironclad willpower. I could resist temptation.

"This is magnificent, absolutely splendid!"

I repeated the mantra in my mind, determined not to be swayed by the satisfaction evident in Darkness's voice.

As I contemplated the delicious crab and the tempting wine, I realized that if I started drinking, I might not be able to stop.

The delightful combination of the exquisite crab and the presumably equally delicious wine was too enticing to resist.

Megumin turned to Darkness and made a pleading request,

"Darkness, I want to try it too, just for today! Please, let me have some wine!"

However, she promptly refused, reminding her,

"No, they say those who start drinking when they're young will grow up to be useless adults."

Megumin and Darkness exchanged knowing glances, and I couldn't help but notice their subtle judgment.

Ignoring their unspoken criticism, I continued to endure the temptation.

Darkness, apparently concerned about my well-being, asked,

"Are you sure you're okay, Kazuma? Didn't you have some drinks during the night of Beldia's defeat? Or is it that my crab doesn't meet your taste?"

"No, the crab is absolutely delicious, no doubt about that. It's just that I can't judge the wine's flavor yet, so I'll pass for today. But I promise to enjoy it tomorrow."

Darkness breathed a sigh of relief and flashed a bright smile.

It was unusual for her to be so understanding and considerate.

I couldn't help but feel a pang of guilt for dismissing her earlier.

Why did she have to be so...

Before I could complete my thought, Aqua chimed in enthusiastically,

"Oh? Do you think there will be any wine left tomorrow? I plan to drink it all, including Kazuma's share!"

A wave of annoyance washed over me. Aqua's stubbornness was truly maddening.

Darkness, still wearing a pleasant smile, said:

"Very well, enjoy more of the crab then. Thank you for taking care of me all this time."

Her words tugged at my heart, making me feel like I had wronged her in some way.

I sighed inwardly, deciding to join in the revelry with everyone and put aside my earlier frustration.

After all, it was a night for celebration.

As I contemplated the temptation of wine and the succubus-oneesan's arrival, I made a decision.

The succubus would have to make an empty trip tonight, and I would apologize to her tomorrow.

Tonight was a time for me to enjoy some wine and camaraderie with my friends.

I reassured myself that it was just the survey form's wishful thinking turning into a realistic dream, nothing more.

I looked at Darkness, Megumin, and Aqua, realizing that their company was more important to me than any fleeting desires.

With that in mind, I recalled what I had written on the survey form and how it had led me to this point.

It wasn't a competition from the start.

After savoring the delicious crab and engaging in lively conversation, I decided it was time to retire for the night

I stood up, addressing Darkness and the others.

"It might be a bit early, but I'm heading to bed. Darkness, thank you for the treat. Goodnight, everyone!"

I left the dining area without hesitation, content with my decision to enjoy the evening with my friends and face the succubus-oneesan's visit tomorrow with a clear conscience.

...

I couldn't sleep...

No matter how hard I tried to shut my eyes, imagine my mother singing a lullaby to me, and sleep in a different position, it always ends up with me turning and tossing around on my bed.

I met the main succubi of the cafe shop and ordered an older busty onee-san in my dream scenario.

Just thinking about it is making me jump like a little kid, shamelessly.

Ahhh, what should I do? I was way too excited to sleep!

I didn't know how long I would be like this.

To clear my head and hopefully tire myself out, I decided to exercise in the courtyard.

The moonlight provided enough illumination for me to see as I moved my body.

However, as I exercised, I noticed a tombstone covered in snow in one corner of the courtyard.

Curiosity compelled me to approach it and clear away the snow, revealing the name 'Anna' engraved on it.

I was satisfied, but was concerned with how sweaty I was.

Despite knowing that the succubus would only offer me dreams, I still felt the need to observe proper etiquette.

With everyone else asleep, I headed to the mansion's bathroom.

The villa, being owned by nobles, had a special magical bathing system.

It essentially functioned as a water heater powered by mana, making it usable even for normal people.

It had its drawbacks, such as causing some tiredness due to the mana consumption, but it was a small price to pay.

I used Tinder to light a lantern in the bathing room and hung an 'In Use' sign outside the dressing area, indicating to the others that the bath was occupied.

I made sure to carefully place my clothes in the laundry basket to signal to the others that the bath was currently occupied.

It was essential to avoid any misunderstandings or awkward situations, especially since we were all living together in the same mansion.

Such wonderful developments just needed to happen in the dream I asked the shop to give me.

Since we were living under one roof, I wanted to avoid my relationship with anyone turning awkward.

In such a situation, even if the girl was the one who stumbled in accidentally, the guy would still be treated as the one at fault.

If I was really caught in such a situation, I would resist to the end.

I would scream before the girl did, and accuse her of being a perverted woman.

"But such scenarios only happen in mangas."

With that in mind, I used my mana to create hot water in the bathtub and settled into the warm embrace of the bath.

The dim light from the lantern in the dressing room cast a soft glow, creating a peaceful ambiance.

As I submerged myself in the soothing water, I stretched my limbs and relaxed, letting out a deep sigh before closing my eyes.

...

Some time later, the moon had settled down, but I still couldn't discover how much time had passed.

Clank!

My eyes shot open the instant I heard something fall against the door.

Initially, I dismissed it as a figment of my imagination, but the silence made it impossible to ignore.

Could it have been the sign hanging outside the bathing room?

I should have hung it properly...

"Hahahaha...!"

Eek!

Was that a little boy giggling?!

When did this house belonged to a shotacon?!

It had to be a prank, I thought, perhaps Aqua's doing. However, considering the late hour, she should be fast asleep.

Concerned that spirits had once again invaded the mansion, I was about to rush to wake her when I heard the dressing section's door creak open.

The sound sent a jolt of panic through me.

Could this all be a dream from the succubus already but is manipulated by the spirits? The timing seemed far too coincidental.

Though I couldn't identify the person, I could make out the silhouette holding a lamp.

If that were the case, she should have noticed my presence after seeing the clothes in the laundry basket.

The fact that she needed a lamp to navigate the darkness ruled out Aqua, who could see in the dark. It had to be either Megumin or Darkness–

Suddenly, the lamp on that person's hand was out.

"Wahh! Why did the lamp suddenly...? H-Hello? Who's there, giggling?"

The voice on the other side of the glass barrier belonged to Darkness.

How curious, I mused. Out of all the possible choices, the succubi had chosen Darkness. Perhaps they selected women from one's past memories, and she happened to fit the description. Maybe that's why.

Well, there was no harm done to either of us in the real world, so I decided to make the most of it and not discuss it with anyone.

"Oh well, fortunately, the moon is out tonight, so this is..."

As Darkness began to speak, she started undressing behind the glass barrier... Hey hey hey!

Just as I was about to interject, a realization struck me.

This was all part of a carefully crafted scenario.

There was no other explanation for such a peculiar turn of events.

Indeed, the timing seemed far too perfect, even for someone with my supposedly good luck.

But wait, something didn't add up.

Before the situation had escalated to this point, I had felt drowsy and closed my eyes.

It finally dawned on me. This meant that the current situation was...!

"Hmm... The moon tonight is really..."

Darkness, using both hands to push her hair behind her head, mumbled to herself as she stepped into the bathing room–

And in the dimly lit room, our eyes locked as she noticed me in the bathtub.

Both of us were naked of course.

Under the faint light of the moon, Darkness's skin looked exceptionally white.

She stood there, seemingly oblivious, without making any effort to cover herself.

"Yo," I casually greeted her, my body still immersed in the bathwater.

Upon seeing my response, Darkness opened her mouth, quickly shielded her chest, and awkwardly lowered herself to the floor.

"Why...? Why, why...? Why, why, why...!?"

"Fufufu..."

I had always found her physique alluring, but observing it now, her figure exceeded my expectations.

Considering her rigorous physical training, I had anticipated a more robust build, yet her proportions were quite pleasing.

Or perhaps, this was the succubus's way of adjusting her form to cater to my preferences.

"H-Hey, Kazuma... Eek!"

"What's the matter, Darkness? Come closer and assist me with washing my back."

I rose from my bath, approaching Darkness as I walked over to the wooden stool.

"Ah...? Eh...? Mmmph..!"

Her reaction seemed to waver between surprise and confusion, with her mouth silently opening and closing.

What had gotten into Darkness?

She was typically laconic in her speech, often quite stoic, yet displayed a noble and brave demeanor when the situation demanded it.

Not that there was anything wrong with this newfound persona.

It felt strangely refreshing, even though it was a far cry from the Darkness I knew in the real world.

This was clearly the product of the succubus's creation, but the question remained: Why was Darkness appearing in my dreams?

Perhaps I should have been more specific in my description, rather than settling for 'A beautiful onee-san with a great figure.' Or maybe I should have just gone all out and written 'The human version of Wiz'?

I'll definitely make a mental note to be more descriptive next time.

"You, you, you, what are you saying!? No, that... Why are you so composed, and what do you mean by washing your back?! There are too many things happening at once, and it's overwhelming my brain...!"

Impressive, it entirely realistic.

Great work Succubus-oneesan! Superb!

"No, now's not the time to feel moved. I didn't add the setting of being unwilling, so hurry... No, I did request for a beautiful onee-san with a great figure, a little shy and unworldly. If that's the case, then she's acting properly, right?"

"Hah?!"

Upon hearing me muttering to myself, Darkness wore a panicked expression.

While this scenario felt refreshing and enjoyable, I knew I needed to take the initiative to advance things.

"Can't be helped. I know your settings are to be naive, but please wash my back now."

"N-No way am I washing your back, Kazuma! And what do you mean you've added the setting?! W-Was this all premeditated the moment you met me at the guild?! D-Did you befriend me just to have your way with me this entire time?! Was Kiritsu just someone else controlling it?!"

"Hmm...? What are you talking about? Just hurry up and wash my back. Are you broken or something? Well, I guess it's my first time, so it might be challenging for them to adjust to my preferences."

"A-Again, just w-what are you talking about?! I am not broken! I-I never was! I-I'm leaving...!"

I could hear Darkness stomping away from me, but I remained calm and carefree.

Slam!

"Eek! T-T-The door just closed by itself, Kazuma! D-Did you see that?!"

"Hmm..? What door? Just hurry and wash my back, please."

"Hahahaha...!"

"D-Did you hear that, Kazuma?! I-I just heard that little boy giggling again!"

After thoroughly analyzing everything that had occurred, I concluded that this was undoubtedly a dream.

There was no way such a bizarre sequence of events could transpire in the real world.

Even as Darkness attempted to flee, the succubus must have detected her intention and compelled this fabricated version of her to comply.

"Spirits? Didn't Aqua exorcise all of them? So there's really no need to worry about them."

"I-It's locked as well! Then I'll just have to kick it down!"

"Well, if you kick it, Aqua and Megumin might wake up from the noise and inquire about the commotion. Then they'll see both of us in the bath and jump to countless misunderstandings... Do you truly believe kicking down the door is the wisest course of action?"

"Ah...!"

She seemed at a loss for words.

Kicking down the door was certainly not a good solution, but remaining trapped in this situation wasn't favorable in her eyes either.

Yet, with the words I had chosen, I hoped to persuade her into following my directives.

"With all that said... Please wash my back for me..."

I politely reiterated my request one last time.

"Could, could it be... Under such circumstances, me helping you wash your back is common sense?"

Despite her panic, Darkness hesitantly approached my back.

I looked directly at her without reservation, and she covered her body and hesitated.

"How refreshing and pleasant this is, but please hurry. It's becoming increasingly difficult to restrain myself, in more ways than one."

"You, you little...! Do you understand the situation? If the nobles were to discover that you forced a noble lady like myself into washing your back...?!"

"If that happens, then I'll take a bath with all of them to compensate..."

"What's gotten into you!? What's with your behavior today!? Among all the people I've encountered in this world... You're the weirdest guy I've met yet!"

"Hey, you're being loud and rude! Do you know what time it is? You'll disturb the neighbors, you know? There should be a limit to how much common sense you lack."

"Why are you bringing up common sense in such a situation!? Am, am I the one who's wrong? Because I lack knowledge about the world? Do I lack common sense? Am I... Weird?"

"In my honest opinion, you aren't weird. You're simply unique. I've never witnessed a noble putting her own life at risk for others. Typically, they're the ones basking in luxury."

Despite her blushing and incoherent muttering, Darkness reluctantly moved to my back.

With a towel in hand, she knelt behind me while I sat on a stool.

At long last, Darkness followed my instructions and began to clumsily scrub my back with vigor.

"Ugh... How did it come to this... A noble lady like me... compelled to wash a commoner's back... It feels utterly humiliating...!"

"Don't think of it as humiliating... Think of it as compensation for endangering my manhood that day and payment for making me repair your armor back then."

"Scrubbing your back takes a way lot more than that!"

"You dare question my judgment? I really ought to be more precise with my requests because this isn't exactly what I had in mind."

"You, you little...! You're behaving like a middle-aged man today! Finished, this should suffice. I can leave now, correct...?"

I could hear her taking a few steps back.

"What are you saying? Even with your settings adjusted, you still lack common sense. Don't you know what comes next? This time, you wash my back without the towel...!"

"That's too weird, too weird! No matter how ignorant I am, I know this is definitely not normal!"

As Darkness resisted me, her face flushed and tears welled up in her eyes.

"Intruder–! Everyone, come quickly! There's an intruder in the mansion–!"

Aqua's voice echoed from within the mansion.

Hey, I was just getting to the good part! I never asked for this interruption!

I hastily snatched the towel from Darkness, wrapped it around my waist, and bolted out.

A quick glance at Darkness revealed her still sitting on the floor, her face red, and her chest covered. Her teary eyes followed me as I left.

Damn it, I really wanted to continue, but even in my dreams, that girl managed to interfere. I'd have to give her a piece of my mind later!

Upon reaching the living room, draped in nothing but a towel, I was greeted by the sight of a succubus girl, seemingly younger than Succubus-oneesan, pinned down by Aqua.

Megumin stood nearby, her staff raised menacingly.

"Kazuma, look! A villain was halted by my barrier and couldn't escape... Wait, now there's a naked intruder on the loose!"

"W-W-Who are you calling a n-naked intruder?! And what's going on? Why is there a succubus here?"

I retorted to Aqua, who labeled me a villain just because I was wrapped in a towel. However, I couldn't shake the feeling that something was amiss.

There were too many people present, and it was peculiar to find a succubus here.

"I've set up a powerful barrier in this mansion. I rushed over because the barrier detected an intruder, and I found this succubus trying to sneak in! Succubi target men, so she must be here for Kazuma! But don't worry, I'll perform an exorcism and get rid of her!"

Hearing Aqua's declaration, the succubus gasped in alarm.

This was all wrong.

Something about this situation felt incredibly off, too bizarre to be real.

But now wasn't the time for that revelation; I needed to handle the succubus before me.

Aqua had a penchant for initiating unnecessary measures, like setting up barriers without informing me. She backed away from the succubus, pointing her index finger at her menacingly.

"Very well, accept your fate! I'll utilize my superb devil-slaying ability... Kazuma, as a guy, don't get too close! The succubus might try to control you..."

In silence, I approached the succubus, grasped her hand, and made a dash for the main door.

"Wait, wait! Kazuma, what are you doing? She's a devil, she's here to suck Kazuma's energy!"

"Wait, wait! Kazuma, what are you doing? She's a devil, she's here to drain your energy!"

Aqua screeched at me, her voice shrill with panic.

Megumin, slower to react, raised her staff, eyeing the succubus with a piercing glare.

The succubus spoke to me in a hushed tone, intended only for my ears:

"S-Sorry, esteemed customer! Please, just let me go. I'm just a monster! I didn't anticipate encountering a barrier, but we're skilled at getting close to our customers. My immaturity led to this failed infiltration. I can't allow you to be embarrassed, so let them dispose of me as a random wandering succubus. You only need to pretend you know nothing at all!"

I turned to face Aqua and the others, positioning myself to hide the succubus behind me.

With a shove, I directed the succubus toward the door.

Then, I clenched my fist, adopting a fighting stance against Aqua and the rest.

"Customer?"

The succubus whispered as I stood my ground.

"Hey, what are you doing? I'm a goddess, after all. I can't let that devil escape so easily. Kazuma, step aside if you don't want to get pummeled!"

Aqua scowled, her words sounding oddly delinquent.

"Aqua, Kazuma might be bewitched and under the succubus's control! Kazuma's has been acting weirdly for awhile! And he was saying something about dreams and settings, so that's probably it! Damn, that imposturous succubus, letting me experience such... Humiliation...! I'll kill her dead!"

Darkness, without even bothering to dry her hair, rushed out in a simple shirt and a snug skirt, her eyes filled with determination as she yelled at the succubus.

Hearing her dangerously determined shout while wearing a tearful expression, I almost took a few steps back.

"Kazuma, are you out of your mind? No matter how cute she looks, she's still a devil. She's a monster. Snap out of it; she's an enemy we must defeat."

Megumin looked like she'd had enough, speaking with a stern gaze and resolute tone.

Her gaze stung a bit, but I refused to back down.

I extended my hand behind me and motioned for the succubus to depart swiftly.

Upon witnessing my gesture, Aqua took a step forward, crouched down, and assumed a fighting stance.

"Looks like I have to fight seriously...! All right, bring it on! I'll teach Kazuma a lesson for shocking my neck and send that succubus to oblivion!"

She roared and lunged toward me.

The succubus, upon seeing this, let out a soft scream.

"Cu-Customer–!"

There were certain things I couldn't betray.

And one of those was the trust my friends had in me when they confided in me about their secrets.

There were things worth protecting.

And one of them was the kind-hearted succubus who willingly satisfied our desires when our pitiful lusts were aroused.

I clenched my teeth with unwavering resolve and raised my hand high above my head.

"Come forth, Kiritsu!"

The door to my room dramatically swung open, and Kiritsu flew toward our location.

However, he purposely misses my outstretched hand, turning around to hover above Darkness and the others, the tip of his blade pointing at me.

"Even you've betrayed me... Then again, you have to trust someone to be betrayed... I never did..."

"Give up, Kazuma! Even your own weapon knows what is right and wrong! At least he has a sense of justice. But I'll have to smash it on your face tenfold!"

Darkness declared.

I remained calm and carefree just like in the bath with her.

Megumin can't use Explosion in the mansion since she lives here, and her only advantage was her physical strength, which surpassed mine.

Aqua's abilities are unknown, even to me, but I'm confident she can put a curse on me if I take her too lightly, she's dangerous and to be approached with caution.

However... the most dangerous of all in close combat... was this angry blonde woman with teary eyes.

She'll twist my neck even on accident if I let her get a grasp on me.

Dammit... what to do?

I needed to buy some time for the succubus to escape, so I opted for a bold move.

Taking a deep breath, I readied myself to cast myself as the villain in this scenario, making it appear as if I were genuinely under the succubus's control.

With a thunderous war cry that echoed throughout the mansion, a stomp on the floor to shake the very continent, I aimed to startle the girls, pushing them to step back and redirect their focus toward me.

"Once I've eliminated all of you girls, I've officially hunted a hundred girls in this world!"

I am Satou Kazuma, the Woman Hunter...!

I've grown from a man... to a God...!

They stood firm and strong together, but their attention was now on me.

"You're already finished, womanizer!"

Aqua exclaimed, charging toward me with her fist clenched and ready to strike.

I can see it... I can see her movements... I can see exactly what she's trying to do!

Everything seemed to slow down.

I could predict each of their actions at this very moment!

This must be the human adrenaline rush when faced with genuine endangerment to their own life!

I'll drop to all fours, run up the wall, and take Aqua by surprise from the side, then tackle the others...!

"You're first, Aqua!"

But wait... if Aqua was moving in slow motion, why was I not moving at all?

Her fist was drawing nearer than it should have...

Moreover, Megumin and Darkness were following closely behind Aqua, their fists poised.

And now, all of them were closing in on my face.

Oh... this felt like one of those slow-motion scenes from an action movie...

I would accept my fate... as long as the succubus managed to escape...

...

After getting my face pummeled by the three of them, my own sword dragged me back to my room somehow.

I tried to ask the others for detail but they also didn't know as well because they went back to their rooms to leave me unconscious for the entire night.

The nerve...!

Now, I was left wondering if Kiritsu had either towed me back by my towel in some unconventional manner or perhaps pushed me along with my bottom to get me into my room.

But my buttocks don't hurt, especially the inside...

As I contemplated this odd situation, another thought crossed my mind.

If Kiritsu could fly... What if I held onto him? Would I be able to fly as well?

Wait, that would be incredibly amazing if it were possible.

I wouldn't have to travel by foot anymore! Well, assuming he would be willing to cooperate...

Though, he'd probably just drop me if I attempted it, but it was worth a try if ever faced with a dangerous situation.

Speaking about dangerous situations...

There's a danger right behind me, glancing at me back and forth without speaking a word.

She still appeared to be upset...

"Hey, can we talk already? This situation feels like some kind of couple's banter, even though we aren't a couple. Besides, all of this was your fault for getting carried away in the heat of the moment."

I was busy cleaning a tombstone, a task I had been performing daily recently.

Behind me, Darkness appeared to have something on her mind, but she held her tongue.

She stood there silently with her arms crossed, making it rather challenging for me to focus on my work.

Of course, I couldn't win against the three of them and got my ass handed to me.

Nevertheless, I had successfully allowed the succubus girl to escape, all thanks to Darkness believing that I had been under the succubus's control.

"Um... You really don't remember what happened last night? You were under the control of the succubus, so you forgot everything, right?"

Darkness finally spoke, seemingly eager to confirm this notion.

As she uttered those words, a gust of wind swept by in such a weird developing moment between the two of us.

I watched as the wind flowed, gently tousling her hair, and causing her tight-fitting casual attire to barely ripple.

She also had both of her hands behind her this time, allowing me to see her bountiful assets.

"Yes. Regrettably, I can't remember anything. I only remember having a nice dream."

Since she gave me a way out, I naturally took it.

That was the best for the both of us.

She smiled and closed her eyes.

"I-I see. That's great... Um, it can't be helped. It was just an accident, so I should forget about it too... But, your attitude was so decisive back then... it was a bit frightening, but not entirely unpleasant either because... to experience such humiliation... It was a new experience for a sheltered lady like me so it was kind of... exciting and exhilarating... But still, you shouldn't order a naive girl like me so recklessly."

H-Hey, what was the other sentence you just said?! Don't dwell on it any further!

You might end up developing an embarrassing fetish that could potentially cause even more trouble for the entire party!

"I should say, you're not a real gullible daughter from a noble family, so you should really learn more about the world. No matter how you look at it, I didn't do anything wrong this time. I lit the lantern and hung the 'In Use' sign. If not for the prank pulled by someone... I even heard the faint laughter of a little boy..."

"So, you did hear the little boy giggling in the bathroom as well... Wait a minute! You do remember what happened last night, don't you?! Didn't you act that way because you were under the succubus's control?!"

Darkness grabbed my shoulders from behind and violently shook me, but I ignored her and continued cleaning the tombstone.

"Kazuma...! Hey, Kazuma...! Answer me!"

I wasn't sure who had played that prank, but I couldn't help feeling a bit grateful for it.

Ultimately, we were all set for the near future.

With food, shelter, and clothing secured, the other problems could be addressed in due course.

After spending so long in this world, I had finally found a place to call home. I should be able to sleep soundly tonight.

That's right, if it weren't for the broadcast that echoed through the entire town, ruining the mood.

"Destroyer alert! Destroyer alert! The mobile fortress Destroyer is approaching this town! All adventurers, please prepare for combat and report to the adventurer's guild! Citizens in the town, evacuate immediately–!"