6238. Don't disparage the Ko-Hyouteki fairies. They have to go through a lot
Lieutenant Naoji Iwasa used his stubby little arms and small periscope to guide his midget submarine into the path of the large (to him) I-class destroyer. He soon became satisfied with his calculations and braced for impact just before his midget sub shook with a satisfying *THUNK*. With rehearsed quickness he pulled the quick-release for his canopy, unbuckled his harness, and jumped out hoping to the Gods that the drag of the water would clear him behind the Abyssal destroyer before the timed explosive detonated. He was relieved to clear the water long enough to see his midget sub detonate nearly breaking the destroyer clean in two.
Now the rough part, Iwasa always went into these engagements with a life vest but that only went so far and despite all of those statistics about lack of fatalities to sharks, he knew full well that they always ate well during a naval war. He was soon relieved to find that his inflatable life raft had survived the collision and wasted no time in pulling the quick-release to the air canister. In what he was sure to look like a rather comical display to normal-sized humans, he floundered and struggled to get his tiny, stubby body into the raft before eventually collapsing inside feeling confident that he was out of danger for now. He then searched all over his surroundings to find the emergency beacon that the Yuubaris had given him ever grateful for the miracle of modern electronics but hoping against hope that the Abyssals didn't triangulate the signal. He then settled down waiting for any sort of lift out.
About a day later, he was greeted by the sight of a nearby island. Weighing the advantage of getting nearby food and water against the all-too-likely possibility that it was occupied by the Abyssals, he let out a resigned "Desu..." and started paddling toward it. After what seemed like an eternity, he made landfall and staggered out of the life raft weakly gripping his emergency beacon. He stumbled into the nearby jungle staying in the foliage until he saw a bunch of ghost-like fairies nearby with an unsettling miasma wafting from them. One of them said to the other, "Grargh. Grargh grargh grargh grargh!" to receive the response, "Grargh. Grargh grargh!" This didn't feel right. Every bone in Iwasa's body was telling him that he was a disgrace to the emperor for not charging out there screaming at the top his lungs and hoping to take as many Abyssal fairies with him before he went down but he knew full well that the emperor had changed his ideas significantly since...
His ideas were interrupted when an Abyssal fairy turned toward him and said, "Grargh?" Iwasa dared not breathe as the fairy walked slowly towards him closer and closer. He scrunched tighter and tighter into a ball when the fairy peeked into the frond he was hiding in praying to whatever gods were out there that he wouldn't get caught. Eventually, the Abyssal fairy let out a resigned, "Grargh..." before returning to patrol with his buddies. Iwasa let out a sigh of relief as he trudged out into the jungle in search of any resemblance of food or water. His search paid off when he ran across a coconut broken in two on the ground. He scrambled up the side of the shell and slipped over the side sliding down into the basin of coconut milk. He then cupped his hands in the comparatively deep lake and brought the sweet nectar of life to his lips. Iwasa took a few more sips then nibbled on the inside of the coconut until he had his fill. He then scrambled right back out and decided to make his way back to the emergency beacon. On his way there, he was tackled with a sudden, "Grargh!" All Iwasa knew for the next 15 seconds was fists and elbows until he managed to shove the Abyssal fairy away and draw his katana cutting deep into the enemy fairy's chest causing to it stumble back confused. Iwasa then brought his katana down on the Abyssal fairy's shoulder causing it to give a pained, "Grarghl," and drop down in a pool of its own blood. Iwasa alertly looked around to see if that fairy had any friends before cleaning off his katana and re-sheathing it. Full of jitters, he found his way back to the emergency beacon where he settled into what looked like was going to be a sleepless night.
As the sun set behind the horizon, Iwasa sang a few songs to himself when he heard a soft, "Yep!" from the nearby foliage. He walked off to investigate and found a friendly fairy urging him to follow, "Yep!" Iwasa fell on his saviour letting out a relieved, "Desu!" but the fairy just urgently stated, "Yep!" as he jerked his head off nearby. Iwasa nodded, "Desu," then looked toward the emergency beacon before asking an uncertain, "Desu?" The other fairy just assured him, "Yep!" before scrambling off. Iwasa followed his new friend to the shore where he saw an American subgirl with the numbers "195" printed on the shoulder of her swimsuit.
Sealion looked at the Japanese fairy scrambling toward her and said, "Hey little guy! You're a long way from home aren't you?" She picked up Iwasa and deposited him down her swimsuit so he could climb into her hull. Don't ask him how, he had done that countless times throughout the Abyssal War and he still couldn't figure out how it was supposed to work.
~o~
Based at Yokosuka Naval Base, Lieutenant Iwasa settled into a small mousehole in Kitakami's room wanting nothing more than catch some extra sleep when a nearby conversation caught his attention.
Petty Officer Shotaro shouted, "...a fucking disgrace! You're telling me nearly 75% of your mini-sub pilots can't sortie because they don't feel like it?!"
Kitakami replied, "It's called 'psychiatric recuperation time'. Get it right."
Shotaro just burst out, "Same difference! We have to keep up a high operational tempo to clear out the Abyssal anchorage but can't because those pussies are too lazy to... SWEET MOTHER OF FUCK MY FACE!"
Kitakami stared in shock as one her fairies let out a shrill "DESUUUUUUU!" and launched into a flurry of kicks and punches all over Petty Officer Shotaro's head. "Wow," she quipped, "Pick on someone your own size!"