So after deciding for a while I think I might just write a chapter of an Assassins Creed crossover someday. I know I asked for opinions on the matter but I honestly think I have an idea on how to do it. Anyways on to the reviews.
codywhite162: Thanks man, I honestly thought people wouldn't find the jokes that funny so I really appreciated that comment. I hope I can keep you entertained.
SandiaVida: I think I can see where you're coming from on the matter. I actually thought he was still pretty reasonable in terms on behavior but after re-reading chapter 5 myself I'm probably going to tone him done a bit.
Guest: Fair enough, thanks for the review. I'll make sure to fix his behavior in later chapters.
Saif Omar: Baka To Test was classic but I have to confess I never really liked most of the cast. Himeji and Minami are just far too toxic for my liking, to top it off, everyone in class F were just a bunch of assholes to be honest. Hated their characters since I first watched the anime as a kid. Hate them still.
grav54: Don't worry, I have some ideas for Miura.
CrazyxEnigma: Try not to think about it too much. I literally got the Kawasaki brother as a friend idea over on the fandom page. I just randomly found out there was a second Kawasaki brother and thought to myself 'hey it's free real estate'. But yeah Saki is still the oldest in the family in my fic. Weird to picture her being younger than her other siblings.
Okami2312: Yeah I re-read chapter 5, I'll tone him down buddy don't worry. He's still going to be kind of an asshole in this fic though so I hope you don't mind that certain aspect of him. As for the out of place jokes? Well just let me think of a way to address that issue, thanks for your review.
Echonic: I know I PM'ed you on the matter but just to clarify, no Hikigaya is the one that won't see Demon Slayer the same way again. As I said, just search up MeatCanyon and Demon Slayer. You'll understand what I mean.
Isuckatnaming: A bit harsh on her but sadly I can understand your hate. Still harsh man but thanks for the explanation.
Renekton Time: Thanks for the review. To be honest, I thought writing about baking cookies was pretty boring so I'm actually pretty excited that I can move on after this chapter.
Holy shit though, 34 reviews in 5 chapters? That's crazy for me, I never thought I'd get this far. To tell you the truth, before I wrote this story, I would delete my old ones before they even reached chapter 3 due to how cringe they were. But enough about my awkward past. Here's chapter 6, I hope you'll enjoy this one. As usual, please review the story, it's my fuel to keep going. Thanks for everything so far you guys. Fair warning though this chapter may prove to be pretty cliche.
Chapter 6: Conclusion to the airhead's request
"Impossible." Yukino muttered in disbelief, eyeing the perfectly baked cookies on the table with a flabbergasted look. "There is no possible outcome in which something as deformed as you would be capable of baking even an inedible plate of cookies, much less perfect ones."
Letting her curiosity get the better of her, Yuigahama took a bite out of one of the cookies I had 'baked'. "Whoa...This-this is good!" Yui praised with stars in her eyes. "But kind of familiar as well..."
"Oh you noticed?" I asked, much to Yuigahama's confusion. "I suppose you're not such an airhead after all Yuigahama-San."
"Hey! I'll have you know I passed the entrance exam to get into this school." Yui claimed.
"Well you didn't deny the airhead bit. But in any case you're right Yuigahama-San. These cookies are indeed familiar." I confirmed. "After all, It's Yukinoshita's plate of cookies."
"Mine?" Yukino asked, obviously confused by the whole turn of events. "I believe an explanation is required in this occasion Hikigaya-Kun."
"True, but the best way to emphasize my point is through a story." I replied. "During my past in middle school to be exact."
"Another monologue?" Yukino questioned with a brow raised. "I know your life is sad but to recount events of your life twice within the span of 30 minutes is simply pathetic. Fortunately I understand your plight as a demented ogre which is why I shall graciously take pity and lend you my ear once again. But please don't make a habit out of this. Even the most patient among us has a breaking point in these situations."
"It's the last one for the day. I swear it on my mother's life so you can kindly shove your insults up your frozen you know what." I reassured. "This story is about a certain 14 year old boy during Valentine's day..."
"What the hell is this?" I muttered to myself quietly as I eyed the bag of burnt cookies I found in my bag. "Alright, which one of you wastes of sperm gave me this?" I stood up and questioned the class, most of them looking at the bag with an oddly equal amount of disbelief themselves. "None of you? Great is class C messing with me now?"
Letting out a sigh of irritation and confusion, I sat back down and continued to eye the bag of cookies with extreme suspicion. Not noticing Orimoto has taken a seat next to me.
"Yo." Orimoto called out, tapping me in the shoulder. "What's up with you man?" She asked, her eyes quickly noticing the bag of cookies. "Are those cookies? On Valentine's Day? And they were given to you?"
"I guess so." I replied, still eyeing the bag intently.
"Holy crap Hikigaya! Congrats." Orimoto congratulated. "And here I was thinking I'd have to give you pity chocolate again."
"Save the congratulations because I'm about to flush these pieces of overburnt turds down the toilet." I retorted much to Orimoto's dismay.
"What?! Why?!" Orimoto protested. "Why do you wanna throw them away? Is it because it's burnt because if that's the case your standards are way too high there bucko."
"Oh come on Orimoto-San, look at the cookies. They're so burnt even a black hole is brighter, light can't escape these damned things due to how dark they are." I replied. "It's most likely just another setup by my dear 'friends' from class E. They realized that stuffing garbage in my locker is no longer possible so now they resorted to giving me burnt cookies during Valentine's day? Talk about desperation."
"But what if this isn't a prank?" Orimoto attempted to convince me otherwise. "What if a girl actually likes you and baked those cookies?"
"If that was somehow the case, she would've left a letter and even then I still wouldn't be that gullible." I simply stated, standing up to make my way out of the classroom. "You can just leave the Cadbury bar in my bag. Thanks again for the pity chocolate Orimoto-San."
"The worst part of that story was the fact that I didn't notice the letter on the floor." I lamented. "By the time Kaori found the letter and handed it to me the cookies were already clogging the toilet."
"You actually flushed them?!" Yui asked in complete disbelief. Can't say I blame her, the first instinct of a lonely creep when he gets cookies from a girl is to normally eat them with gratitude so to find out one of them flushed hand-baked cookies into the shitter must have been new. "How could you do that?!" She scolded.
I have to admit, Yuigahama's pretty cute when she's mad. Well that wasn't creepy at all now was it?
"In my defense I was ruthlessly bullied by everyone in the same year so to find out one of them suddenly had a change of heart and gave me cookies on Valentine's Day is extremely suspicious." I defended. "And it wasn't just teasing. There were instances where I ended up eating food spiked with laxatives whenever I left it unguarded so you're going to have to forgive me for my harsh action."
"Laxatives? Stuffing garbage in lockers?" Yukino asked quietly, strangely looking concerned for me. By the looks of it even Yuigahama is surprised by Yukinoshita's sudden change in behavior. "I-I'm sorry you had to endure that."
Okay I'm not used to this. The ice princess herself giving me pity? Man this is weird.
"Don't worry about it. The 'Shitty-gaya' nickname died down when I turned 15. By that point I was already used to it." I reassured, looking at Yukinoshita weirdly for her sudden change.
"Uh...Hikki?" Yui spoke up. "I don't wanna sound uncaring and all but what did the letter say in the end?"
"Oh boy...that's a good question." I answered. "It said and I quote 'Please enjoy the cookies Ha-chan, I made them just for you. Love Keika'. And if you're wondering who Keika is, she's my friend Taizo's little sister. I got a black eye a week after when her big sis Saki found out what I did. Not a smart choice of action that day."
A moment of awkward silence passed before I spoke again.
"In any case, take it as a lesson Yuigahama-San."
"A lesson?" She asked.
"Yes." I answered. "Men are extremely flawed creatures. They completely misunderstand something at face value, so giving them your burnt cookies will probably send the wrong message. Especially if you do not write a note. But then again I was overly suspicious back then so don't take my words too freely."
"Then what do you suggest I do?" Yui asked.
"What I suggest?" I ponder for a moment. "Show him how hard you're working for his sake, and keep working hard to improve. I'm sure whichever unlucky boy that digests your poison-"
"Poison?!" Yui said, clearly offended seeing that she's throwing kitchen appliances at me.
"I mean 'cookies'." I 'corrected'. "Will one day realize how you truly feel about him and be touched as a result of the effort you're putting in."
"...Hikki?" Yui said. "If you were that boy? Would you be touched?"
"Me?" I asked, pointing to myself. "I doubt it honestly. After my negative experiences with people in general, the only crap I'll probably give if I find myself in this situation is the one coming out of my butthole."
"Oh..." Yui said with a deadpan manner. "Well I think I know what to do now."
"And what would that be Yuigahama-San?" Yukino asked.
"I'll keep trying until I get it right." Yuigahama answered, proceeding to the door. "Thanks Hikki and Yukinon."
"She's probably going to burn down her house trying to replicate your cookies isn't she?" I asked Yukinoshita. Staring at Yuigahama's retreating figure.
"Only time will tell Hikigaya-Kun."
~ Timeskip ~
And just like that a week in this hell has finally passed. I have officially went a total of 7 days without attempting to murder Yukinoshita. I should be awarded some kind of trophy for not doing so if I'm being honest. Who could fare better than I?
"Hikigaya-Kun." Yukino broke the silence. "I just wanted to let you know that I agree with how you handled the situation involving Yuigahama-San last week."
"You agree with me?" I asked, astonished by what she had just said.
"Do not be so shocked, I find myself agreeing with you far too often much to my dislike." Yukino replied without even sparing a glance. "But I've noticed something. When you talked about how through hard work Yuigahama-San's goals would be achieved, I could tell you did not believe yourself when you said that."
"I can only give what I think is good advice Yukinoshita-San." I stated, not bothering to look at her as well. "But how events play out? Well. we'll just have to see what Fate has in-store for dear old Yuigahama-San. Sadly, Lady Fate is usually a bitch in these situations."
"It sounds like an excuse failures give themselves when they do not succeed." Yukino said with a small scowl. "In any case this concludes our session for the day. You may go now."
"Alright, I'll see you tomorrow I suppose." I said, making my way out. "But before I leave, what was that business with Yuigahama-San earlier on?"
"Nothing too important." Yukino informed. "She simply wished to give us these." Taking out 2 bags of cookies and tossing one to me. "Yuigahama-San has baked a bag of cookies for us as payment."
"Did she burn her house down trying?" I sarcastically asked. Earning an eye roll as a result.
"I doubt it considering there was no recent outbreak of fires in the neighborhood." Yukino retorted. "On a side note you should find Yuigahama-San interacting with the club more often. Expect a more hectic time Hikigaya-Kun. Just a warning in advance considering the strain may be too much on an undead corpse."
"I'll consider myself forewarned." I said with an annoyed glare. Walking out of the clubroom and into the hallway. I opened the bag of cookies given by Yuigahama only to find much to my surprise...
"A perfect bag of cookies? No fucking way." I muttered to myself. "I guess I shouldn't start using the term Yui-tard just yet." Taking a cookie and biting into it without a fear of being poisoned for once. I find myself rather shocked by how decent it tasted.
"And to think it was made by Yuigahama of all people. Not bad Yuigahama Yui. Not bad at all."