Whereas Alex fought the urge to just give up and melt down, Jaden seemed unfazed by the interaction. She was understandably confused by what was said, and she stared at Nathan's retreating form a bit miffed. But she wasn't accusatory; she didn't start attacking Alex or claim that she had been compromised. She simply assumed that there was more to the story. Alex had had her bra thrown at her, after all. There had to have been more going on than just that thirty second interaction, "So you knocked boots with the guy- fine. But it looks like you let your guard down along with your pants."
"Jaden, relax. He was joking," Alex did her best to brush Jaden off. Maybe she could convince her that it was nothing; it was all some kind of fucked up joke. Maybe Alex could convince herself that it was all a fucked up joke as well. If she squeezed her eyes shut, pinched herself, turned around three times, prayed real hard, and wished upon a star, she could escape that nightmare. She had never had that kind of luck before, but then could be her chance. The rogues had been successful out in the field; they had a black box. Surely, Alex could then dupe Jaden into letting Nathan go. If she played it right, the world wouldn't end just yet.
"Seemed more like he was pissed. What went down between you two?" Jaden instantly caught the lie. Alex honestly should've known better. She couldn't slip a lie past Jaden. She was always on her. She always knew she was hiding something. She always suspected that she wasn't the star studded agent everyone made her out to be. Jaden was right, of course. Alex should be watched. She was hiding something. She wasn't a perfect Division agent. That was why it was so difficult to dissuade the other agent, especially then. Jaden was right, and she was going to keep pushing until she felt satisfied. Alex was falling fast, and there might not be a life preserver.
"Nothing you need to worry about," Shrugging, Alex moved to finally close the door. She seriously needed to think of a solid lie. She couldn't keep avoiding Jaden or dodging the conversation. It only made her more suspicious and the whole thing so much worse. However, Alex couldn't think of anything good enough. She could maybe tell half-truths. That could maybe get her through the night. But it wouldn't sway Jaden for long. She'd come back with even more questions and some serious allegations.
"So it was serious?" As Alex had fearfully suspected, Jaden was already well aware of what had happened between her and Nathan. How he had acted when he had returned her clothes wasn't something a one-night-stand would've done. There was so much more between Alex and Nathan- too much more. Alex knew she never should've let it get that far. Her original instincts to not let Nathan in had been right. She should've kept a wall between them. She shouldn't have tried to love someone else. She knew that relationships always ended in pain, so why had she risked it with Nathan. She knew better than that.
It was too late for her to fix things. Alex could never have any kind of happiness, peace, love, or future with Nathan. They couldn't run away together. She couldn't be with him, even after she killed Semak and helped the rogues burn Division. It was better if she stayed alone. People would be safer away from her. After all, there was only so much she could do to protect Nathan after her destructive path had almost torn him to shreds, "No. He wanted it to be. But I told him to leave me alone. That I knew some dangerous people, and that he should stay away."
"Have you told Kelly?" Jaden wondered innocently. If someone was harassing an agent, Kelly should know. She might not have had all of the agents' best interest at heart. And she wasn't the most helpful at times. But she was the head of agents. She'd know what to do if there was a problem. She could also gauge if Nathan needed to be threatened or cleaned. Alex shouldn't have to make that decision- she probably couldn't anyway. Calling in assistance was the best course of action, especially since it would save their asses in the long run.
"Why would I?" Although Alex kept trying to play Nathan off like he was nothing, she knew that was it. She had never been able to convince Jaden of anything before. She couldn't make her stop bullying and annoying her. She couldn't make her stop sticking her nose in business it didn't belong in. And she couldn't make her stop doing what she thought was best. Alex should just give up on trying to lie. She couldn't save herself, and she definitely couldn't save Nathan. The only thing she really could do was stall Jaden until she had a better plan of escape. Or until she realized it was the end of the line for at least one of them.
"We should call it in. Get it on record that surfer boy might know a little too much. It'll take, like, two seconds," Jaden moved towards the phone in Alex's apartment. She was only doing what she thought was right. To her, Nathan was a danger. Division had to come in and protect them. She didn't know any better. Alex couldn't fault her for trying to keep them safe (maybe under different circumstances, she could see that act as one of friendship). However, Alex couldn't let her make that call. Division was the danger, not Nathan- never Nathan. Yet, as she yanked Jaden away, she instantly became confrontational, "What are you doing?"
"There is no reason to call," Alex desperately stopped Jaden from picking up the phone. There was no way Alex could save both her ass and Nathan's. She was going to have to engage Jaden in yet another fight. Maybe she should've just given Nathan up. Maybe she should've had one shred of self-preservation. She could get everything she wanted if she simply stayed silent and if she just let Jaden do whatever she wanted. However, how could she live with herself if she did. Alex had to save Nathan. All he had done was love and care for her. She couldn't let him suffer for that. He deserved better- far better than her.
"What are you doing? Let go! I'm not gonna end up with my ass in a sling," Shoving Alex off of her, Jaden reached for the phone once more. She didn't care to know what was going on anymore. Whatever it was, it was dangerous, and it was going to get her killed. Jaden might've been willing to die in the service of the mission, but she absolutely would not die for Alex. If Division had been compromised, she had to report it. She had just earned her freedom; she wasn't going to jeopardize it for anything- especially not for a stupid boy and a stupid girl.
Alex had to stop thinking. She had already made her mind up about Nathan: she was going to save him no matter what happened to her. Then, she had to make her mind up about Jaden. Yes, Jaden had always been annoying and mean. But that didn't mean she deserved to die. Unfortunately, Alex didn't have a choice anymore. Only one person could get out of that situation in one piece, and it had to be Nathan. He hadn't asked for all that pain when he had decided to date Alex. He only wanted happiness. She was finally going to give that to him by ensuring that he lived the rest of his life, "Well, neither am I!"
"You are hiding something. Whatever it is, you're not taking me down with you," Jaden struck Alex as she lunged for her. Alex instantly retaliated. The two had fought and sparred numerous times in Division, yet those were merely attempts to kick each other's ass. Then, they knew one of them had to kill the other. There was nothing holding them back. Jaden fought for self-preservation and the freedom Division had given her. And Alex fought for Nathan. The latter's decision would probably only lead to further danger. Yet she didn't care. It was the actual right thing to do. And it would make her parents proud.
Drawn by the commotion- and possibly by the fact that he couldn't leave Alex for long- Nathan returned to the apartment. Something was occurring, and he had to get to the bottom of it. Tragically, he entered at a horrific time. Alex and Jaden had each other by the throat. Instantly, he attempted to separate the pair; he tried to help Alex. Yet he was no match for two Division agents. He was violently shoved aside while they handled things on their own. Neither was actually handling it that well. They were both tearing each other to shreds. Until someone grabbed the gun hidden in the apartment. And until a shot rang out.
For a moment, Alex didn't know what had happened. She had heard the gunshot, but she didn't know where the bullet had struck. It could've been her; she could've been dead (she wished she was dead). However, she didn't feel any pain. She didn't feel any warmth seeping out of her either. All she felt was a body go limp against hers. She feared it was Nathan. Yet, when she looked at him, he was still standing away from her. The body that slumped against her was Jaden. Alex scrambled away from her, briefly believing that she was going for another attack. But that was far from the truth. Jaden couldn't attack anything.
The newly promoted Division agent fell to the ground with a haggard breath. She struggled to keep breathing, but it was a losing battle. She hardly had a chance to fight death before it claimed her. Frantically, Alex scanned the area to figure out what happened. That was when she finally noticed the gun in Nathan's hand. He had been the one to fire the pistol. He had shot Jaden. Although Alex's first instinct was the scream and cry, she had to hold herself together. She had to finally take control of the situation. It had so badly gone to shit, but maybe she could still salvage it, "Nathan. Nathan. Hey, Nathan. I need you to go."
Nathan didn't move. He let Alex take the gun from his hands; however, he didn't move. Shock had him completely frozen in place. He couldn't believe what he had done. He couldn't believe that he had actually shot someone. The gun had just gone off. He had only wanted Jaden to stop hurting Alex. He hadn't wanted to kill her; he hadn't wanted to kill anyone. It was an accident. An accident he refused to wrap his head around. Maybe it was all a dream. It was only a dream that he'd wake up from and find Alex safely in his arms. She was with him then, after all. Maybe she could stay with him, "What about you? What are you gonna do?"
"I'll be fine. I'll be fine. Okay. I need you to pack as fast as you can. Okay. I need you to go, please," Gently, and battling the rising anxiety in her voice, Alex urged Nathan. There was a chance he could still stay safe if he ran. No one would know that he had been there. If he ran, if he hid, Alex could actually fulfill one of her goals: Nathan would be safe and sound and away from all of that miserable pain. She could keep protecting him. But only if he ran right that moment and never looked back.
Except, Nathan couldn't. He only stared at Jaden's dead body and shook. Alex softly nudged him to go. She softly begged that, even though everything had fallen apart and shattered at her feet, she could still save him. But it might've been too late for that. He had killed someone. He had watched someone die. Nathan was never going to be the same again; he was never going to be innocent. He was alive, sure. Yet Alex had still ruined his life. And that pain was etched across every one of his features, "Who are you?"
"Please leave now!" Pain crept up in Alex's voice as well. She shoved Nathan as far away from her as possible and forced him to run out the door. She could only hope that he listened to her, packed his things, and found a good place to hide. She couldn't help him escape. After all, she might fuck that up to. No, her damage had to stay contained to her apartment- her broken, destroyed, bloody apartment with a dead Division agent inside it. Oh God. What had she done. She was screwed. She was more than screwed. She was as dead as Jaden.
Scrambling for her burner cell, Alex frantically called Nikita. Division had choppered her out of Pennsylvania immediately after the mission was over. However, she was pretty sure that the rogues had stayed for a little while longer. They could very well still be there. Or they could still be driving home. Regardless of their exact location or proximity to her, Alex pleaded for their help. She could wait for it if that was the case. She just couldn't be alone. Her thoughts were too hectic to cling to, and she was positive that she was going to break apart at any second. She needed a safety net. She needed a friend, "Nikita, thank God. I need your help."
"What's wrong?" Nikita's concern was immediate. She didn't need to know what had happened in the few hours since they had seen each other; Alex's panicked, tearful, terrified voice was enough for her to start wondering what she needed to do to help. She placed the call on speaker so Michael could hear as well while they drove back to the safehouse. If needed, they'd redirect their course and head straight towards wherever she was. Fortunately, they were still geared up from their mission. Whatever was wrong, they'd be ready for it.
"Jaden, she, um… She came over, and we got in an argument, and then it happened so fast. And she tried to kill me…" With Nathan gone, taking the remainder of her forced strength with him, Alex was left trembling. The full weight of everything seemed to crash into her all at once. She was going to be discovered as a rogue. She was going to have her deal taken away from her. She was never going to avenge her family. And she was never going to have at least one moment of happiness again. Jaden was dead- a Division agent was dead- and it was all her fault. She couldn't escape that time. She had nowhere left to run.
"Alex, slow down. Where's Jaden now?" Gently yet sternly, Nikita made Alex stop and think. She could panic about what had happened once the crisis was over. Although the threat was gone, she still wasn't out of the woods left. More dangers could pop up in every corner and jump out of every shadow. Alex had to be prepared to face them all. If she spiraled then, as terrifying and overwhelming as it all was, she was only going to get herself hurt. She had to slow down. She had to keep fighting.
Struggling to control her breathing and to continue biting back tears, Alex started to tell Nikita what had happened. Then, she stopped herself. She trusted the rogues- she really did. She could tell them anything. However, she couldn't tell them about Nathan. He had to remain hidden from everyone. His involvement had to be a secret- a secret she took to her grave. It was the only way to keep him truly safe. No one could know the full truth, neither Division nor the rogues, "She's dead. Shot. And, Nikita, the body is here, and I don't know what to do."
"Call Division. Tell them the truth. Say that Jaden attacked you, and you were defending yourself. They'll send a Cleaner to deal with the body. Call me when the Cleaner leaves," Although Nikita wasn't a fan of her own advice, that was the only option that'd truly help Alex. Division would soon know that Jaden had died in Alex's apartment; her tracker would go offline, and they'd be alerted to her last location. If the rogues stepped in then, Alex would only be in more trouble. She had to rely on Division first. If she stuck to the truth, she should be believed- she and Jaden had fought before. She should be okay. And if not, then the rogues would be there.
Shakily, Alex agreed. Division was the most logical choice. After all, Jaden had attacked her, and she had been killed in self-defense. As long as Alex kept Nathan out of the story, she wouldn't get in trouble. It would just be seen as an unfortunate accident. Amanda would believe her. Hanging up on the rogues, the young agent took a deep, settling breath. She set her shoulders, lifted her chin, and reached for her apartment phone. It took her another moment to force the panic out of her voice, yet by the time someone in Division answered, she was calm and steady. It was going to be alright. She was still safe, "I need to report an incident."