At least it was a clean break and the bullet had gone through and through. Those were the only positive things about the injuries Nikita had inflicted on Alex. Maybe also the fact that Amanda and Oversight left her alone while she healed; she wasn't being pressured into doing anything she didn't want to do, like talk to Percy. However, at the same time, she wasn't receiving any new information about Semak or her mother. Alex was left completely alone with the healing process and her thoughts. That was exactly what Nikita wanted, and Alex hated it.
She needed to be doing something. Alex had never been one to just sit and do nothing. She had to remain active. She had to do something that'd help further her mission and finally get what she wanted. Digging up information from Division's files was the best she could do, though. That, and physical therapy. Her broken arm wasn't that bad. A couple weeks with a cast, and she'd be good to go. Her gunshot wound was the bigger issue. She had to build back up the muscles in her thigh. Although it was painful, forcing herself to walk at a steady pace on the treadmill was the best she could do. And she hated it.
Being left with all the thoughts racing in her mind only made her more focused- and angrier. She was sick and tired of being stopped at every turn. Everytime she made any progress in her revenge mission, she was forced to take several steps back. Division, Oversight, the rogues, they all shoved her back, forcing her to do what they wanted. She needed to escape that vicious cycle. She simply didn't know how. Maybe that could be what she focused her thoughts on as she went through rehab. However, as she came to that revelation, she was interrupted by another person who wanted to stop her. She sneered at the sight of him, "Not now, Sean."
"I'm not here for you," Sean rolled his eyes. He just happened to walk past Alexandra on the treadmill as he went to meet with Amanda. He wasn't there to urge her to run again. He had said his piece when he had left her in Medical the week before. If she hadn't been willing to listen to him then, maybe there wasn't a point in ever trying to get her to listen. His focus should instead be on protecting those he cared about. He'd have a better chance of saving them. At least they wanted to be saved; he wasn't so sure about Alexandra.
"Then why do you keep fucking bothering me?" Alex snapped. She also stomped her foot on the treadmill as emphasis. Unfortunately, the foot she unthinkingly slammed down belonged to her injured leg. She fought her wince. She controlled her breathing to hide a shout of pain and forced herself to continue walking. If Sean noticed her pain, he didn't let on. Yet Alex hoped that he didn't. The last thing she needed was his concern for her wellbeing, or- worse- him telling her that she clearly wasn't up for what she wanted. He had no idea what he was capable of.
Sean knew exactly why he kept pestering Alexandra. He had thought it was fairly obvious with how often they found themselves in the same argument. But maybe he was just deluding himself. He had gotten too close to her on his assignment to protect her, and he was beginning to blur the lines. He should pull away. Alexandra had. And since she refused to listen to him, then he should stop caring. They were both going to keep getting hurt. So it was better if he just pulled away with one final comment, "Cause someone has to look out for you. This place is a death trap. You're gonna get killed if you stick around. You're lucky you haven't already."
"If you're so worried about safety, then you get out," Alex knew that it was a childish response, but it was a perfectly valid one. Sean pushed so hard for her to leave Division; however, he continued to stalk the halls and do whatever the fuck he was doing for Oversight. What kind of hypocrisy was that. She had a mission, just like he did. If he couldn't quit it, then so couldn't she. It was that simple. He wasn't more important than her just because he had a rank. They both had deals with Oversight, after all. And they were both stuck in that hellhole. Neither could leave, so Sean should leave her be.
That should've been when Sean walked away. He could stop engaging with Alexandra, and all she'd be left to think about were his parting words. That would've been for the best. She needed to think about the danger that she was in. But he couldn't pull away from her. Not until he made her understand. A part of him knew that it was useless. Alexandra would never listen to him- that bridge had been destroyed between them. Yet he still had to tell her; he still had to make himself clear, "I will when I get what I want."
"What do you think I'm fucking doing?" Alex shouted as Sean continued on his way. She didn't know how many times she had to repeat herself. She didn't know how many times it would take for Sean or Nikita or anyone else to realize that what she was doing was important. It wasn't just about revenge. If it was, then maybe she should have stopped. But killing Semak wasn't the only thing Alex had to do. She needed to save her mother. She had to rescue her from an evil man and bring her somewhere safe where she could actually live in peace and happiness. There was nothing that could make her give that up. And there was nothing that could stop her.
Shaking his head, Sean had to force himself to keep walking. He shouldn't have said anything to Alexandra. They had only shouted the same things to each other as they always had. Nothing new came from the conversation, just further anger and confusion. Even his resolve to pull away from her seemed shallow. If he saw her again, he didn't think he could actually stop himself from talking to her. The only way to make the cycle stop was to stop the rogues. Despite all the complications, Sean knew how simple that was. If he finally stopped the rogues, then everyone he cared for would be safe. They could live if the rogues died.
In the week that followed, Nikita didn't say anything else about what had happened with Alex in that alleyway. The last thing anyone said about it was Michael saying that he believed Alex would take the time to think things over. Nikita was done arguing, so she didn't utter a word in response. She simply moved on to other tasks. The general mood in the safehouse seemed to improve as time went on. The rogues let themselves be bolstered by the fact that they had taken out one member of Oversight. Five more to go, and Division would fall. And when that happened, hopefully, they'd be set free.
Nikita was using that hope to keep herself positive. Michael had been right to fight against her morose thoughts. She couldn't let herself become drowned out by them. She had to remain on mission; she had to keep fighting. Though, no matter how determined she was, she couldn't completely silence her thoughts. She couldn't help but be lost in them at times- like when she sat at Birkhoff's computer, waiting for something to download. Her eyes landed on a snowglobe of a beach on his desk (where had he even gotten that), and her mind ran away with other thoughts and ideas. Her task wasn't important anymore. All her focus was on that beach.
"'Hey, Birkhoff, I need to use your computer. Is that cool?' 'Sure, Nikki. Thanks for asking'," Snapping Nikita out of her head, Birkhoff teased. He was fine with the others using his system as long as they asked first. After severely messing up a hack once, Michael had learned that lesson. Nikita, on the other hand, continued to do things on her own. Although he wasn't worried that she'd ruin his system or perform a bad hack- he had taught her well- Birkhoff still didn't like that she was touching his stuff. Especially since she was going about it with the intention of being on her own.
"Hey, Birkhoff, I need to borrow a hundred grand. Is that cool?" Rolling her eyes, Nikita asked. Birkhoff was right: she should ask others before doing things that involved them; she had a really bad habit of not doing that. Maybe if she worked on that, then things would get better. It was something she could improve upon with the next mission. She had found something while digging around in Birkhoff's system and poking around on the black box. The team had another chance to expose a member of Oversight. They couldn't hesitate before taking it. The quicker the war ended, the better. There'd be less of a chance of people getting hurt because of her actions.
"See how easy that… wait a minute. What?" It took a moment for the words to catch up with Birkhoff. For a moment, he had thought that Nikita was finally asking to use his computer. Then, her real request hit. He could only stare at her incredulously as he tried to wrap his head around what she wanted. What could she have possibly been buying that required a hundred grand. If it was a weapon, why didn't she just find a way to steal it. And if it was clothes or jewelry, then she needed some kind of intervention. There was nothing that could've warranted spending that much money. Especially after the drones he had blown so much money on.
Sighing, Nikita had expected that kind of reaction from Birkhoff. Despite the fact that he had a seemingly endless supply of cash from all his hacking, he always complained when he had to spend more than a dollar. It was constantly surprising that he had been willing to fund the rogues for time. Though, Nikita suspected that he reached his limit at times. Then must've been one of those times. She'd have to explain herself carefully if she wanted him to agree to her request, "We have a lead that could help us identify another member of Oversight."
"We have a lead?" Birkhoff continued to stare at Nikita in surprise. That was the first he had heard about the supposed lead. Nikita had never mentioned anything about knowing another Oversight member's identity. She must've been sitting on the information until she was certain of the lead. If that was the case- which Birkhoff was sure that it was- then it wasn't fair. What part of the word 'team' did Nikita not understand. She had to tell him and Michael everything. Even if it was a ridiculous and crazy thought. They all had to be on the same page. They couldn't go rogue from each other.
"Spain's defense minister is doing business with an Oversight member. One of his staffers is willing to sell us the identity, but he needs a lot of money and in twenty-four hours. So, I'm also gonna have to take your jet to Lisbon," Nikita continued to explain herself. It had taken a lot of work to be able to secure that information. She had made too many calls, and called in too many favors. She couldn't let the opportunity slip through her fingers. Who knew when the team would have another chance like that one.
"Hmm. No," Birkhoff dared to challenge Nikita. He figured it was about time someone stopped her from constantly returning from her missions depressed, sullen, antisocial, and carrying the weight of the world on her shoulders. They were a team. They were supposed to carry all the burdens. Nikita wasn't alone; she hadn't been for a while. She had to stop acting like she was the sole savior of the world. It wasn't all on her. Even what had happened to Alex wasn't solely her fault. The team of rogues shared the burden and the blame, "Get used to that sound, baby. Cause I'm not gonna let you just rush in and out of here without talking to us first."
"You're really gonna do this now?" Reclining back in the hacker's chair, Nikita crossed her arms and glared at him. Again, she knew that Birkhoff was right. She should do a much better job of talking. However, she could tell Birkhoff and Michael everything on the jet to Lisbon. There was a time limit to the things they wanted to do. They couldn't keep scrambling around for years, trying to take Division down by simply stopping their numerous missions. They weren't able to stop every one of them; after all. The rogues had to start directly attacking. They had to go for the masterminds to make it all stop.
"Well, it is my mission too. And this is my house. And we're talking about my jet. So I think I can start bossing you around now, Nikki," Honestly, it took everything in Birkhoff to not cower under Nikita's glare. Although he knew she wouldn't hurt him then, he also knew the malice she could hide in that look. A part of him warned that he should be careful as he proceeded. However, the part that needed to get her to listen won over. Birkhoff wasn't going to back down. He'd step up to Nikita, and make her talk and listen and do all the things that teammates did. They were all together for better or worse, so she better get used to it.
While Nikita and Birkhoff glared at one another and silently debated how that conversation was going to go, Michael finally joined them. He wasn't curious about what the two had been up to; he didn't ask to be brought up to speed. In fact, he hardly even noticed that he was walking in on something. There had been something he had seen while he had watched the news that the others had to know about it. Oversight wasn't their only concern. More dangers from their past had resurfaced, "Guys, there's something that you need to see."