Fast Sloth (10:11 AM): Okay guys, so, heads up, I'm inviting someone I met in another discord server over to ours
Snowflake (10:12 AM): Do you know this person's real name?
Fast Sloth (10:13 AM): nah, just his username. Trident. He's been a pretty cool guy
Dragon (10:14 AM): awesome, it's always good to have more people here
Chocoholic (10:15 AM): agreed. It'll be a pleasure to have him, I'm sure
Fast Sloth (10:16 AM): K, sending him the invite
Rose (10:18 AM): what's this other server you're on like?
Fast Sloth (10:20 AM): Well it started as a chat space for people who like to listen to Jeff Williams music, but at some point it just kinda turned into a hangout room for anyone who wants to be around people. It's got about 150 people I think
Snowflake (10:21 AM): goodness, I'd hate to have to moderate a group that large.
Rose (10:22 AM): ditto
Penny (10:28 AM): Salutations, Trident! Welcome to the server!
Dragon (10:29 AM): welcome, initiate! Have you come to join our lovely little cult?
Penny (10:29 AM): Trident has left the server. So long, friend!
Fast Sloth (10:30 AM): Goddamnit Yang
Dragon (10:30 AM): I didn't think he'd take it seriously!
Rose (10:31 AM): I honestly wish I could say I'm surprised you accomplished that
Snowflake (10:32 AM): I think I understand why you've become eternally single
Dragon (10:33 AM): no bulli the dragon!
Dragon (10:33 AM): for real, sorry about that. Invite him back, Nora.
Luna (10:34 AM): T A check out the chat above
A (10:35 AM): He seems a little jumpy lol
T (10:36 AM): (deep breath in)
T (10:36 AM): AHAHAHAHA
T (10:37 AM): Buttery smooth, Yang! Flawless execution
Dragon (10:38 AM): I said no bulli
Fast Sloth (10:39 AM): I'm watching you.
Penny (10:41 AM): Salutations, Trident! Welcome to the server!
Trident (10:42 AM): I'm guessing there's no pretending that I didn't just run like a bitch?
A (10:43 AM): not a chance. Nice to meet you though
Rose (10:44 AM): Howdy! Please ignore my sister, she's a little special
Dragon (10:45 AM): now that's plain rude. But yeah, sorry man. Didn't mean to freak you out.
Trident (10:46 AM): it's alright lol. I just actually once had someone try to recruit me into a cult, so when I saw your thing I thought "Nope, I'm not sacrificing any goats to Cthulu today!"
Fast Sloth (10:47 AM): lol
Dragon (10:47 AM): what are you, kidding? Goats are expensive.
Dragon (10:47 AM): We keep it simple and use chickens.
Snowflake (10:48 AM): .mute Dragon 48 hr
Penny (10:48 AM): :ok_hand:
Rose (10:48 AM): please ignore my sister
Trident (10:49 AM): I'll remember to do that now
T (10:50 AM): server like this one, you can't really have thin skin for jokes
Trident (10:51 AM): looks like it. So, yeah, nice to meet you all!
Chocoholic (10:52 AM): Hello! Are you a student, by any chance?
Trident (10:53 AM): I am, actually. I go to Emerald City College
Rose (10:54 AM): whelp, been nice knowing you
Fast Sloth (10:54 AM): that's okay, friend. We won't judge you for making terrible decisions
Trident (10:55 AM): ah, so I just walked into a room of Vale U peeps.
Luna (10:56 AM): except for T and A, yeah
Trident (10:56 AM): interesting names, btw
A (10:57 AM): just bragging about what we've got
Trident (10:57 AM): if you've got it, flaunt it. No judging from me
Snowflake (10:58 AM): out of curiosity, what made you choose trident as a name?
Trident (11:00 AM): I used to be super afraid of swimming. I had a friend help me get over it, though, and afterwards I started reading some aquaman comics.
Fast Sloth (11:01 AM): inspired by a guy that talks to fish.
Trident (11:02 AM): there's more to him than that!
Abs (11:03 AM): it was hilarious seeing you call yourself the king of the sea
Trident (11:04 AM): Yo, Sun! Good to see you!
Luna (11:05 AM): you two know each other? Small world
Abs (11:06 AM): yep yep, this is my old friend Neptune. How've you been, man?
Trident (11:07 AM): been good, just working on some stuff
Luna (11:07 AM): hold up, What?
Trident (11:08 AM): what?
Rose (11:08 AM): holy shit you're Neptune
Fast Sloth (11:09 AM): guys I had no idea, I'm so sorry
Trident (11:10 AM): what's going on?
Abs (11:10 AM): ?
Snowflake (11:12 AM): Don't feel sorry, Nora. This is actually a good thing, because Neptune deserves everything he's about to get.
T (11:13 AM): So first, taking effort to write these
T (11:13 AM): Appropriately. I will ask you not to leave. I believe you owe me this much.
Trident (11:14 AM): Uh
T (11:14 AM): Please
Trident (11:15 AM): Okay...
T (11:15 AM): I am Militia. A is my sister Mel. Snowflake is Weiss.
T (11:16 AM): Stop typing. I see you typing. Stop. You get to read, not type.
T (11:17 AM): Sun, because you didn't know, I used to date this friend of yours. Used to, until it was brought to my attention that he was cheating on me. A lot. And then after we were dating, and maybe before, I discovered he was hitting on Weiss.
Snowflake (11:18 AM): Nods
T (11:18 AM): Turns out I got to help her from making a mistake with him after that before even joining the server.
T (11:19 AM): You know, Neptune, I have to thank you. Because you were such a shit, Mel spent the weekend with me trying to help me get over things, and she pointed out the most wonderful blonde doof I've ever had the pleasure of meeting
T (11:19 AM): We hit him up and he had no idea it was so endearing
T (11:20 AM): Even had his own boss bitch backing him up next time he came
T (11:20 AM): So you know what we did, Neptune?
T (11:20 AM): We both, me and Mel, decided to date him
T (11:21 AM): Because he was nice, genuine, sweet and just stupid enough to be lovable
T (11:21 AM): He's Luna, for the record
T (11:22 AM): Here's us having sex together because he knows how to work two ladies at once- unlike present company
T (11:23 AM): You know the best part Neptune? Not only is he dating both of us, but Mel is also dating Weiss
T (11:24 AM): It's almost like you're the best wingman on Remnant! You should advertise that- 'I'll go around douching at you and all your friends until you're all in one big cozy open relationship and I get to jack off by myself because I'm such a sack of shit who can't help but flirt with four girls at one time'
T (11:25 AM): I'm even rethinking being straight! Maybe I should date Weiss too! Get Jaune in on it! Give him a treat for being such a good boy
Luna (11:26 AM): am I a dog now?
T (11:26 AM): In bed you are
Luna (11:26 AM): yes dear
T (11:27 AM): How's that sound snowflake, wanna come further into our nest of Fuck You Neptune?
Snowflake (11:28 AM): We'll talk later.
T (11:29 AM): Because you piece of shit, this is what good people get to experience. This is how loyal people get to be happy. Because we trust each other, we can be happy together without having to wonder if the other person is a lying, cheating ass monger who is also such a giant goddamn hypocrite that he doesn't understand that being a dork is what makes him charming, not the cool guy facade he tries to put on! I thought that was cute at first too, you know? The whole insecurity thing, I thought Okay I can work with this I can fucking make him have real confidence and it'll be great and maybe Mel will stop thinking he's a two timing piece of shit. turns out she was right you are just that
Trident (11:30 AM): ...
T (11:31 AM): I am going to go fuck my boyfriend with his other girlfriend and maybe her girlfriend too
T (11:31 AM): You have fun
T (11:32 AM): Until you piss off the wrong girl who has connections to a crime family and she arranges a hit on you when you least expect it
T (11:32 AM): oh wait too late
Penny (11:34 AM): Trident has left the server. So long, friend!
Luna (11:35 AM): Mil?
T (11:35 AM): yeah babe?
Luna (11:35 AM): I love you.
T (11:36 AM): And we love you. Thank you for being you.
Abs (11:37 AM): that was
Abs (11:37 AM): wow
Abs (11:37 AM): I'm sorry Neptune put you through that
A (11:38 AM): It's not your fault. That asshole doesn't deserve you apologizing for him.
Snowflake (11:39 AM): I'm glad you could get that off of your chest. Although I must recommend that we not add anybody else unless we actually know them.
Chocoholic (11:40 AM): Mm
X
Special thanks to my friend Burkion for handling Miltia handing Neptune his ass back to him. Don't cheat on your SOs, people.