By ijnfleetadmiral

And Now For Something Completely Different...

The Naval Base had been quite as of late, aside from the usual bouts of Kongo-ness, but that was nothing new. The latest 'incident' had concerned the SCIENCE!girls' latest inventions, something called 'multi-vector stimulative autonomous capture devices'. Reactions to the project had varied; Akashi had protested, destroyers had quivered in fear, mom-boats had gone into 'me smash all threats' protective mode, and the Naval Base's resident pervert – aka Iku – had immediately inquired if the items were available for private purchase in bulk.

Not something one wanted to hear from someone like Iku, but there you go.

In any event, someone in the SCIENCE!girl department had apparently taken leave of their senses and actually sent Iku one of the damned things, which had resulted in Iku's girlfriend Lieutenant Kamata taking 'emergency leave' on the day Iku had received the device…and neither she nor Iku had been seen since.

That had been five days ago, and Admiral Goto was now feeling somewhat concerned about it. Admittedly, he had absolutely no desire to find out what sort of perverted acts the submarine and her girlfriend were up to, but at the same time both were personnel under his command, so he needed to know they were all right and not both dead due to some kind of sick sexual experiment gone wrong.

He sighed. Sometimes being an Admiral meant you learned things no mortal man needed to know.

Especially when said situations involved Iku.

He was drawn out of his musings by the door opening, and Nagato leading a JMSDF Lieutenant Commander into the room. The officer came to attention and reported.

"JMSDF Lieutenant Commander Hasegawa Gensuke, reporting!"

Goto acknowledged the young man's report and motioned him to a seat, introducing him to Mutsu and Oyodo. "What can we do for you, Commander?"

The young man appeared embarrassed. "Sir, I'm in charge of a unit that monitors various websites that JMSDF personnel visit. This includes the shipgirls, as you know."

Goto nodded. "Allow me to apologize if any of your personnel needed therapy after seeing some of the sites certain…persons…look at. You all have my sympathies."

Hasegawa nodded. "Thank you, sir. If I may speak freely, our unit does have a high turnaround rate." He shook his head. "But the reason I'm here is we also monitor the content on the websites that personnel create themselves."

A sense of foreboding began in Goto's mind. Uh oh…He smiled nervously. "You all definitely have my sympathies."

Hasegawa laughed nervously. "Sir, with all due respect, one of your shipgirls needs…well, I don't know what she needs. She runs a website called , and –"

Goto moaned and dropped his head in his hands. "Don't worry, Commander…I know exactly who you're talking about."

Hasegawa shook his head. "Then you know about the five-day-long livestream they're doing involving something they're calling an 'autonomous capture device'?"

The way the color drained from the Admiral's face immediately clued Takahashi in on the fact that – up until now – the Admiral had been blissfully unaware. Oops.

The Lieutenant Commander glanced around the room. Nagato was hunched over some paperwork, shaking her head and muttering darkly about 'improper behavior of military personnel', Mutsu was giggling and teasing Nagato, while Oyodo had a notebook out and was scribbling rapidly, in between worried glances at the Admiral.

The silence was broken by another shipgirl bursting into the room.

"Admiral! I got a text message from my sister! She's getting married! I get to be a bridesmaid! Eeeee!"

"What."

The flat reply came from the Admiral, who still looked like he was seeing his life pass in front of his eyes.

"I get to be a bridesmaid, Admiral!" The new shipgirl twirled around happily. "Iku-chan was doing a livestream with Noriko and she said she proposed right in the middle of it. Noriko said 'yes' quite enthusiastically, too, almost like she couldn't wait to marry Iku-chan! Isn't that romantic?"

Hasegawa saw Mutsu clap a hand over her mouth to hold in her giggles. Nagato stared down at her paperwork with an 'I don't need this shit' expression, and Oyodo was muttering something about hand cramps.

"Admiral…?" Nimu trailed off, looking at Goto in concern.

Before anyone could say anything, a ceiling tile popped loose and a brunette girl wearing a flowing white mikotop jumped down.

"Heyyy! Teitoku! I sensed you needed me, Dess!" She announced cheerfully, walking over and plopping herself in the Admiral's lap.

Goto's response was to whimper forlornly and cuddle her close, causing the girl to squeal in delight and smother him with kisses interspersed with giggles and lovey noises.

Hasegawa silently wondered just what kind of insane asylum Admiral Goto was running.

"Ah, Teitoku…you're not usually this clingy, Dess!" The girl on Goto's lap giggled. "Perhaps we should go back to your quarters for an extended lunch break?" Her voice dropped to a seductive purr that Hasegawa was sure would make any man bow to her will. Without waiting for an answer, she got to her feet and started dragging Goto to the door.

"Teitoku needs a long lunch break, Dess!" The girl announced, adding with a giggle. "He might be back tomorrow, depending on how well treatment of his condition goes."

"Unacceptable!" Nagato snapped, following the girl and Goto out the door. "Kongo, dragging the Admiral away on a regular basis must stop! You can't simply –" The conversation faded as the door shut behind them and a giggling Mutsu, who had decided to watch the confrontation firsthand. Oyodo merely sighed and returned to scribbling in her notebook, muttering something about the Japanese Psychiatry Association. Hasegawa decided it was best not to ask about it. He then noticed the remaining girl in the room – the one who'd burst in excited about being a bridesmaid – was staring at him, a contemplative expression on her face.

"What's your story, Commander?"

"I, er…I'm from the JMSDF," Hasegawa stammered. "I'm part of a unit that monitors internet usage amongst JMSDF and kanmusu personnel. I informed Admiral Goto about your sister's livestream." He introduced himself. "Lieutenant Commander Hasegawa Gensuke."

"Submarine I-26…call me Nimu," the girl replied, then noticed the surprised expression on Hasegawa's face. "Something wrong?"

"My great-grandfather served aboard you during the Pacific War," Hasegawa replied. "It's an honor to meet you."

Nimu smiled. "I'm always happy to meet a descendant of one of my crewmembers! When did he serve aboard me?"

"He changed his family name to Hasegawa after the war," Hasegawa stated. "His name was Yokota Minoru."

Nimu's happy expression took on a seductive quality. "Really."

Hasegawa briefly caught a glimpse of Oyodo rolling her eyes and muttering, "Here we go again…" He didn't know if his decision to bring up his familial ties to the subgirl had been the worst or best decision he'd ever made, but judging from the look Nimu was giving him, he was probably going to have a helluva good time finding out.