No More

by Sivaatasi

How much crap does a guy have to take just to get a fair shake? The school was out to get him, villagers were trying to ruin his life, and everyone he'd ever loved (admittedly that's not many people in the life of our favorite Jinchuuriki) were vanishing on him. Determined to make a new start, he learns that not everything glittering is gold. AU, Naruto. M (just in case).

21. Chapter 21

A/N: Three words: Not da Kushina!

Okay, off to Nadeshiko in this jumbo-sized edition. Enjoy!

~Siva'a-tasi

~III~

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Chapter 21: Final Step of the Shinobi: Moving Forward

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~ Previously on No More (Extended Version) ~

With the added clone to help double team the intruders, Danzo's agents found themselves taking body blow after body blow as initial clone fear of being captured gave way to brief feelings of invulnerability. The two clones landing heavy blows to the body and face of the agent responsible for their "brother's death" channeled chakra into two overpowered sidekicks sending the battered kidnapper deep into the wall next to the front door enjoying the sound of his ribs caving in.

Then they turned their combined attention to the one near the kitchen and the route officially began, the second agent becoming a human battering ram as his back shattered the front door less than a minute later.

The last agent in the living room kicked away his tenacious opponent, grunted in disappointment when it didn't disperse, then tore open his cloak to reveal several explosive notes stuck to his chest plate.

When every note began hissing at the same time, the eyes of every clone in the living room shot open in worry.

While this frantic struggle was going on, Naruto, still deep in the hallway, began using the knuckles of his punch knives to shatter every enemy joint he could reach. He blocked an overreaching backhand smashing the elbow joint with a satisfying crunch, catching the agent's surprised grunt even as his attacker dropped the stick into his waiting left hand. Leaning backwards to dodge the taller man's overhand swing, he tapped his hand on the backside of the agent's arm to help overbalance the attack and expose the man's short ribs to a healthy straight left, another grunt emerged following the sound of more bones cracking. Without waiting, Naruto dropped his right hand into the man's left hip and followed immediately with a left uppercut to his sternum. The taller foe dropped to his knees after Naruto's combination halted his downward spiral to the floor.

The fight was over at that point. Sprawled out in the hallway, his opponent was leaned up against the wall with his body slumped almost flat to the floor. It all ended when his clones dispersed.

The rapid-fire memories uploaded and Naruto's eyes exploded open. That last agent was wired for bear, his entire ribcage layered in explosive notes and the last image his clones saw before running for the hills (the traitors) was all of them lighting up. The blond Genin wasted exactly half a second considering whether or not to grab the helpless Root agent before bolting for the back bedroom unencumbered, leaping up onto the mattress as his arms came up across his face, then diving head first through the window at the head of his rickety bed.

His arms, head, and shoulders breached the clear pane with an ear-shattering crash. Then the tiny apartment was engulfed in the flames of an exploding tag of military grade strength reinforced by the still active gas line of his apartment building.

~III~

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~ Konohagakure no Sato, Red Light District ~

The explosion propelled him across the narrow alleyway behind his apartment, the force of it bouncing his reinforced body off of several very solid objects, the brick walls cracking with the impact. Bouncing along off-kilter, his back slammed into a fire escape and ricocheted his pinwheeling carcass into an available dumpster.

His training with Gamatetsu had managed to make his skin resistant to non-chakra enhanced weapons and slashing blades. It hadn't progressed to a point where he could shrug off the deep-tissue damaging blows of heavy concussive force. Being launched into a stone building like a human trebuchet counted as heavy concussive force.

He felt something in his back and shoulder crack right before his neck and skull impacted something less giving that brick making his vision sparkle and flash. Then the light dimmed as his eyes shuttered closed, his ringing ears drowning out the panicked shouts of people in the streets.

Interestingly enough, Naruto's first sensation following the deafening detonation of his hundred square meters of real estate, and resulting blast furnace-level heat, was not visually oriented. It was sound. His eyes twitched as he listened to the sound of his own heartbeat echoing in his ears as he floated in a pool of very warm liquid.

The first steady THRUM-THRUM jarred him into full consciousness. The second popped his eyes open showing him a very concerned pair of Umihebi siblings standing waist-deep in the large pool created in his improved mindscape. He found the glowing crystals clustered in the roof reminiscent of the tenth dungeon level of Istoria and oddly soothing to look at.

Shifting his eyes to the sibling duo, their transformed human arms were holding his body suspended in the warm water's embrace, his ears just below the pool's surface as they kept his nose and mouth safely breached. The water pulsed in time with the steady beating of his heart, a warm glow illuminating their features and the female's generous curves. Peaceful was a very inadequate description of how he felt.

Then the situation began to settle in on his decreasingly-confused brain. Blinking in surprise as the tepid liquid lapped at the sides of his face, he gave Opal's concerned face a megawatt smile that flushed her cheeks with relief.

"Welcome back from the land of the nearly-dead, Kit." Naruto shot up out of the water and spun to face the Kyuubi in utter confusion. "Don't act so surprised. I am grateful you are not dead yet as I myself am not ready to pass on." The large fox frowned at the outwardly immaculate avatar of its vessel. "Please stop trying to die in creative and imaginative ways."

Naruto's mood turned sullen, his lower lip poking out as his cheeks puffed out eliciting a squealing "Kawaiiiiii!" from Opal.

"You act like I ask for people to murder me with creativity," the boy groused. The Kyuubi let the opportunity pass. Someone had tried to make yakiniku out of the boy and the beast was rather drowsy after repairing the internal damage done to its host; it took a great deal of concentration, even for the millennia-old bijū, to force and guide enough chakra through the purification array to spur healing. It wasn't like Kurama could just flood the boy's body with toxic youki as that would cook him alive then kill him slowly turning the frail human into a mutated vegetable. It would be a moot point in the near future once he mastered the annoying frog's Iron Kimono technique but, for now, a motherly hand was needed.

Naruto grinned despite the grumpy bijū as something dawned on him. "You called me 'Kit!'" The fox's nearly shut eyes snapped open and its massive jaw unhinged before imitating a large koi fish a few more times. Choosing to be done with the remaining conversation, the twenty-meter entity spun around once and flopped down with its back to the ridiculously-grinning Genin.

The blond's smug victory was short-lived as Opal repeatedly battered his arm with light open-handed slaps as Titus tittered like a small child.

"Don't scare us like that again!" she bellowed, which for Opal was half a decibel louder than Hinata in full-squeak mode. Pretending to cover up and cower appropriately, Naruto tried to placate the excited sea-serpent-in-human-form with raised palms and tender hugs. Once her shivering manifestation sighed in relief, the shell-shocked shinobi blinked rapidly between the siblings.

"H-How are you both here?" Opal, refusing to budge from her warm embrace with his hand tenderly stroking her hair, sniffled when Titus shrugged his shoulders.

"I felt a pull near this middle portion of my form," he stated indicating his non-existent belly button. "It happened right as you dove through that window then, the next thing I was aware of, I awoke here alongside my sibling. When you appeared almost immediately thereafter, the great fox directed us to lay you in the pool while it channeled youki into the waters using your manifestation as a focus to heal your physical body." Naruto nodded as he glanced down into the water pooling around their waist, his eyes subtly sliding past the large breasts pressed against his abdomen.

All he could remember was being panicked and wanting to pull the anchored summonses into his arms to shield them from the heat. Then everything after was a painful blur.

"Before you ask," the Kyūbi no Youko grumped out over its shoulder, "no, I did not bring them here. You must have done it before you passed out." With that disclaimer done, it flopped back down in another huff. "You should probably return soon before someone hateful finds your undefended body and rams something pointy into it."

Naruto blanched and began the difficult task of disengaging from Opal who clearly did not want to be let go. He would need to remember both this little trick and try to replicate what he did to pull them both into his mindscape. That would be a handy way to meet, talk, and train with them both.

"It's nice to know that I can bring you both in here, but we'll discuss that more once I can do it again without being nearly incinerated. In the meantime, I think I have a way to safely bond with both of you." That statement caused Opal's hands to shoot to her open mouth, her arms smushing her bosom nicely making her impressive rack appear even larger.

The absolutely terrified looks on the faces of both summonses did not go amiss but the incredibly bright smile from the fading Genin seemed completely unaffected by either one. Opal's frantic expression turned to her brother who merely lifted a palm to forestall her panic attack.

"We will discuss this with the Clutch. They will know how best to proceed." Not knowing what else to say, the greatly concerned Opal whimpered as she faded out.

Kyūbi, who had become re-interested in the conversation, sighed. It seemed another human was bound and determined to end its life unnecessarily abruptly. 'Just as things were getting comfortable around here.'

~III~

"Ugh," was the first sound to leave his lips as the pain and disorientation from being a human projectile slammed into Naruto in waves. Kyūbi was making good on his promise to help unbreak him but the lingering vertigo and queasiness were both a real bitch to deal with and slow in fading, just like the painful ringing in his ears. Everything was muffled and it felt like he was wading through sludge.

When his vision cleared enough to make out details, he blinked in shock. Looking up from the squishy and smelly bed of refuse threatening to make his nausea worse, he was greeted by the raging inferno that was once his apartment. 'They probably wanted to make sure I was good and roasted,' he surmised full of disgust and loathing.

It was getting harder to justify protecting the village especially after days like this.

Naruto clambered out of the dumpster, stumbled like a drunken sailor, staggered until he regained enough of his equilibrium to allow semi-straight-line movement, then trudged around to the front of his building to see what was left. He was almost certain that anything short of the gear he had stored on his person and in his seals was long gone and now he had the added hassle of trying to find another place to stay short notice.

Abe-san and his family didn't need Naruto's special brand of trouble. If Root was psychotic enough to attack him and torch his apartment during the busiest time of the Entertainment District's rush hour, they'd think nothing of eliminating the gentile family of four. He wasn't sure how strong the seals were at the A.S.C., and he wasn't itching to give them a test run before he knew what the hell he was doing with fūinjutsu. If he couldn't protect them, then he wouldn't endanger them, and it was as simple as that.

Maybe he could sneak a room in the community shelter for the weekend? It was a fleeting thought across his mind right before darkness reached up to snag his consciousness and the world went black.

~III~

In front of the nearly-condemned conflagration, Boar was issuing orders while the Shinobi Corps made half-hearted attempts to douse the flames as they hungrily spread through the bottom two floors. Another gas line exploded somewhere on the first floor.

Until the Utilities Detachment secured the gas lines to the now thoroughly-gutted structure, it would be a waste of time and chakra attempting to combat the fire. Instead, they spent the majority of their time protecting nearby buildings. Meanwhile, Chunin were being supervised by Tokujo Jounin fulfilling crowd control roles, which meant keeping back onlookers and prostitutes from the brothel across the street. Oddly enough, they seemed deeply concerned for the demon-, er, sole occupant of the mostly abandoned apartment complex.

The level of purpose and intensity immediately ratcheted up five levels once the Hokage appeared alongside Dragon, the dreaded ANBU Commander.

"Status," the heavily modulated voice rang out instantly silencing anyone within twenty meters, shinobi, and civilian alike. Boar did his best to maintain his composure with the suffocating killing intent flowing from both his superior and his Hokage.

"Commander, close to eight-thirty, an explosion claimed the entire upper floor of this complex and, while contained on all sides, burns unabated. Containment perimeters are in place as we await the Detachment's successful completion of their job: securing the main gas line to the structure. Judging by the radius of debris and the apparent center of the fire, the source appears to be young Uzumaki's apartment. I cannot stress enough that (he pointedly looked to the utility lead) we cannot get close enough to investigate further until the gas lines feeding the blaze are secured."

While he couldn't read the facial expression behind the mask, the body language was clear. Impatience and rage radiated from Dragon in waves, much like the fire behind him.

"Stop trying to tell my people how to do their-!" The squawking Detachment Director never got the chance to finish his rant, having stormed up to Boar in an effort to defend his personnel's "lack of initiative," as the ANBU Commander reached out to lift the paunchy man from the ground by the front of his grease-stained kimono. His belligerence abruptly died off like a leaky balloon as his throat's free access to air vanished.

"You have thirty seconds to terminate the fuel lines before my ANBU take you and your entire crew to visit Ibiki." Kimono released and airways restored, the rotund civil servant landed heavily on the rocky ground before scrambling off, his voice shouting orders as his arms flailed about full of purpose and import.

The roaring blue flames sputtered briefly before dropping in intensity and billowing more acrid smoke into the night air. Water jutsus began churning more smoke and flames into hissing steam shortly after that. The fire was out only thirty-six minutes after it began.

The Commander turned to Boar and hissed out, "Make sure he meets with Ibiki when the fire is completely out." The on-scene commander grunted out a pleased-sounding acknowledgment. Boar hated the smug bastard and was tired of his arrogant delaying tactics.

"Does he have to arrive with all body parts attached?" Stares from both individuals of rank made it known that missing limbs would be counted against his performance evaluation so the dutiful ANBU flickered off to spur the efforts of the forensic squad.

While the aforementioned Forensics Squad moved in, once the flames died down, Rat leaped down to the street and held up a partially broken ANBU mask, the right side from the looks of it. Dragon's growl caught the Hokage's attention as he nervously awaited news of his surrogate grandson.

His most feared ANBU held up the charred mask shortly after a gloved thumb brushed away the space directly under the eye revealing the kanji for "Root" and four numbers on its otherwise plain surface. Knowing only blood would silence the now furious director of his deadliest shinobi, a very old and tired feeling Hokage nodded his head once with a heavy sigh.

A clear response needed to be given.

Dragon's finger reached up and double tapped an earpiece immediately silencing the sparse chatter on the line.

"Priority deployment ALPHA-FOUR-ZERO-MOD-DELTA: Squads One through Four, Squads Ten through Twenty. Converge on Lima IP, Four Mikes, Go-Go-Go-Go!" It was a detailed plan built on simplicity. Dragon ran numerous planning workshops centered around multiple catastrophe scenarios and grouped them into different tiers by threat origin first then type.

Alpha threats were internal.

Bravos were external but ally-related.

Charlies were external non-friendlies and made up the larger population. Konoha had a lot of enemies.

From there, threats were grouped in blocks of ten increasing in number the greater the threat. Below ten meant civilian or political threats. Ten through nineteen were organized non-shinobi crime or academy-level threats and held the fewest contingency plans. Twenty to twenty-nine were Genin through Chunin and so on all the way up to Kage level monsters and full on shinobi-wars. Danzo and his Root fell into the internal organization-level threats and made the basis for the first internal disaster plan Keina ever penned, the MOD indicating either a retaliatory or pre-emptive strike with little to no warning for Root.

Even as she blasted across the rooftops headed towards the identified insertion point, the "IP" identifying one of Danzo's three warehouse fronts, her mind began rolling through what she expected to hear through her earpiece. Like clockwork her Captains chimed in followed by squad leads for the numbers she called out, each response indicating a four-man cell enroute to fulfill a specific objective.

In this case, Squads One, Two, Three, and Four made up the sharp end of the kunai thrust, their job being to infiltrate Root headquarters through the given IP; this was strictly scorched earth tactics, no survivors, no pausing to confirm kills. Squads Ten through Twenty were the blocking/ flanking force assigned to cover the rear. Nothing was to get in or out, two squads plugging the hole created by the invasion force while the rest stopped up key exit points discovered through years of grueling stakeouts and detective work.

The two plugging squads were to come through after the fact and finish off anything still moving, breathing or moaning. The Shinigami could sort them out later.

The two sentries atop the warehouse in question were the first to learn of the plan. Unlike Ne, Konoha's ANBU, this strike team in particular, had plenty of branch family Hyūga sprinkled throughout. Stealthy though they were, they were not clever enough by half to evade the all-seeing eyes of the Byakugan. The first of the sentry pair had fallen before the second realized something was not quite right, his eyes expanding despite his conditioning as the first divination strikes immobilized Agent Zero-Three-Eight-Eight. As numbing darkness closed their eyes, ghost after streaking ghost burst into the dormant building below while hordes of their comrades scoured the village for escapees.

Any squad not called out was to immediately begin patrolling routes both inside and outside of the village locking down all non-vital travel. This was an extermination of all hostile forces on all fronts.

Keina's grin beneath her mask was savage because tonight, after over a decade of biding her time, Danzo would finally get what he deserved for attacking her kin and being an overall pain in her rear over the years.

Tonight, she would tear out the weed choking the great tree by its roots.

Having watched his ANBU general vanish in a torrent of wind caused by her departure, Hiruzen's tired eyes lasted just long enough for the forensics squad to lower the first body bag and then they took on a steel-hard glint.

No, he would not feel sorry for his former friend. Having watched his Commander leap away fast enough to mimic a Body Flicker technique, he refused to apologize for the wave of death headed his opponent's way. Hiruzen almost casually flicked the channel of his own radio set so that he could hear the sequential reports as Konoha's ANBU prepared to invade Root Headquarters in order to kill everything breathing, Kakashi doing the same even as the cyclops' eye scanned the adjacent alleyways for signs of survivors. Both sighed in deep relief as Neko's voice came out on the ANBU frequency once roll call for the ongoing OP wrapped up.

Apparently, she'd found the unconscious jinchuuriki blown into a nearby lot passed out due to head trauma and was taking him to the hospital for emergency care.

"Kakashi." It was one word that conveyed a silent command; with the briefest of bows, Kakashi acknowledged the order and multi-sequence Body Flickered across town to meet Neko at the hospital. With one last look at the ramshackle apartment tenement that once protected his adopted grandson, Hiruzen vanished in a swirl of leaves back to the comfort of his office.

His old bones weren't meant for so much excitement.

~III~

From the rear crown of the First Hokage's monument rose three figures draped in cloaks the color of midnight. As the platform locked into place with a shuddering Clank, the two masked members of Root pushing their chakra through a complex (and shoddily made) Doton seal collapsed to the ground joining four others of their loyal organization, their chakra coils depleted and collapsed beyond recovery.

Without so much as a nod to their sacrifice, the three shrouds calmly exited the ponderous elevator after the larger of the three turned one last time to cast a hooded gaze over the sprawling village hidden amongst the trees of Konoha.

Danzo Shimura snarled as decades of planning and work crumbled down around his ears all because of one stubborn boy.

If he hadn't resisted, if he'd only come along quietly instead of sticking to his foolish humanity, Danzo would have had all the strength needed to ensure Konoha stood alone at the top of the village heap for the next century. Instead, he now fled for his very life, the Sandaime's hounds hot on his heels after the first reports of a struggle reached his agents over their private communications network.

He grimaced here. That was an expensive loss that took almost ten years to engineer under the noses of Konoha's proud shinobi force and that was just the smallest loss he suffered that night.

When the boy's apartment went up in a gout of draconic flame, he knew the Hokage would be coming for him in due time. Why not? Were he in Hiruzen's place, he'd of done the same without a second thought.

"Never leave an enemy at your back" was his lifeline to survival. It was just a shame that the old fool finally caught on to that lesson.

Turning away from the glowing aftermath in the Slums District, Danzo padded off along the upper reaches of the monument to begin their tricky descent along the far cliff wall. They needed to be quick in their escape. He'd only get five minutes tops before ANBU responded to the perimeter seals and came after them and it was a very long way to his ally in the Land of Rice Paddies.

~III~

Naruto's eyes tried to scrunch up even tighter as the bright morning sun started poking at his brain through angry eyelids. He hurt all over and the world refused to stop lurching even with him laying on this uncomfortable bed. 'Ugh! I hate the smell of… oh, crap on a stick!'

Cracking open one shuttered lid, he saw exactly what he expected to see. Above were the sterile ceiling tiles, the exact same ones as his last visit if the stains from his pea-shooting target practice were any indication. Tightly tucked in around his waist were the familiar scratchy bedsheets he hated so much and invading his nostrils came the same acrid chemicals hospitals always bought in bulk.

The only pleasant differences were the blond and bluenette mops of hair spread out across his bed to either side of his body, both faces asleep and turned in his direction. Even if both pairs of eyes were closed, their pretty faces each gorgeous in different ways, were a pleasant way to wake up despite his current location.

"Troublesome blond." Naruto's eyes snapped up to the pineapple-haired Genin leaning against the far wall, his smirk positing both relief and annoyance. "I'll let the nurse know that you're awake. She refused to leave the hospital until you were 'out of the woods,' so to speak."

With that, Shikamaru slid open the door and ducked outside as the rest of his confusing day began.

The girls awoke when Nurse Otoha zipped inside and began her examination, hands pulsing with strong iryojutsu chakra. Naruto tried to fight his rising blush (and other body parts) as three pairs of intense eyes embedded in incredibly attractive faces studied his every reaction.

Despite being given a clean bill of health, the good nurse ordered him to stay put for the morning so they could observe him for signs of a lingering concussion, his earlier comment about being dizzy of great concern. While souring his mood further, this gave him the opportunity to get caught up on the latest happenings. With the sensei of Team Seven (oddly enough) lounging nearby, Naruto couldn't sneak away without getting caught so he busied himself with the company of his friends.

Ino confirmed that his apartment was a total loss. Nothing of it remained but a cat-faced ANBU had come by first thing in the morning to leave a scroll and fresh keys. The attached note showed the scroll was from the old man stating that the keys in his hands belonged to apartment Three-Ten in what was known affectionately as Shinobi Towers, one of four high rises catering specifically to Konoha's military force. Naruto's despair at being homeless vanished as now he'd have neighbors, dangerous neighbors for people trying to kidnap or murder him in his sleep.

Ino then peppered him with question after question about what happened the night before. Seeing no reason to hide the truth, he shared his misadventure with Shikamaru and the girls only to receive several shocked gasps and another resounding "troublesome" from his male teammate. Shika shared that his father was out 'til early morning with the Hokage and wouldn't speak about what was going on but several smoking buildings observed on the boy's trip to the hospital and dozens of injury reports tucked under his father's arm when he came home hinted at hostile action. Shika was betting that Konoha was in the middle of a mini-civil war and this Root faction centered prominently in the whole affair.

Naruto diverted those dark thoughts for a moment when he asked for his combat bracers from a reluctant Shikamaru. Despite their fears that he would make a half-naked break for freedom (they were all painfully aware of his hatred of hospitals), he instead unsealed his mission pack from a medium-capacity storage seal and passed several scrolls to his blond teammate. Her bukijutsu was progressing nicely, however, Ino's taijutsu was still non-existent and Naruto finally had a plan to correct it. She now held in her possession a beginner's physical conditioning plan (custom-written by Naruto himself) and basic manuals on both Wushu and Tai Chi fighting systems. Ino lacked the upper body strength for Wing Chun but either of these would give her a boost to her meager hand-to-hand capabilities.

The blond kunoichi fell in love with the flowing grace of Wushu, in particular, the internal flow of the Seven Star Praying Mantis style depicted on the scroll and promised to start work on it as soon as they got back from Nadeshiko. Contrary to the fierce external focus of Konoha's balanced taijutsu, the Seven Star's ne ja, or internal energy-based focus, seemed graceful and relaxed, almost dancelike.

Once the good nurse cut him loose, the remainder of the weekend passed without incident. Naruto's new apartment placed him snugly between Yugao, Kurenai, Gai, and a Chunin from the defunct Haitori Clan. Two floors above him were Iruka-sensei, Ibiki, and Anko, much to his chagrin. The many other nameless faces would become familiar over time.

Setting aside his normal practice sessions, Naruto spent the remainder of his time checking in with Nurse Otoha (to make sure his vertigo didn't return), the Hokage, replacing his few destroyed belongings, and stocking his new apartment with enough food to survive the weekend.

Opal and Titus bid him farewell late Sunday night needing to return to the Grotto and recharge. Short of an emergent summons, she promised to see him again in two months. Seeing as the good nurse ordered him to take it easy over the weekend "or else," Naruto dove into his storage seals in preparation for his first exam.

Before he knew it, he found himself standing at the eastern gate with his team awaiting the arrival of their client, one Jiraiya of the Sannin.

"Ready to go, Gaki?" Naruto's smile deflated as he spun around to respond to Jiraiya's customary greeting, his eyes locking upon the dreaded Snake Queen of Konoha. Having been brought up to speed by the resident Gossip Queen, Ino Yamanaka, Shikamaru captured the rapid drop in morale best with a single thought.

"This should be boring as all your fleshy kind tend to be." Naruto at first blinked at the unfamiliar grumble from his tenant before a smile replaced his shocked expression.

"You never know. This could turn out to be more interesting that you think," he countered mentally unaware that life was doing just that at the Southern Gate as he was leaving through the Eastern Gate.

~oOo~

Kotetsu smacked away the sandals of his lifetime watch partner, the Tokujo Twins filling in as Chunin watchstanders to help perpetuate the lazy attitude most people attributed to the most powerful hidden village in the elemental kingdoms. It was hard work appearing so lazy in public.

As he was about to deliver another tongue lashing addressing Izumo's tendency to sleep through another four-hour chunk of their six-hour watch, his thoughts were sidetracked by the pale-faced Genin extending both his papers and the temporary papers of his rather attractive companion. Quickly licking a finger and running it over an eyebrow, much to Kabuto's amusement, Kotetsu stepped forward to professionally perform his duties.

"So, Kabuto-kun. Welcome back!" Kabuto grinned quite sure that neither of the guards were paying him any attention. He could have brought in a rabid buffalo and his new "attendant's" face would have given him unfettered access to wreak havoc throughout the city. Guren was admittedly a very pretty woman making cold nights on the road quite bearable but he wasn't about to share her with these soon-to-be Konoha corpses.

Well, perhaps he'd save these two for future experiments he mused as the bumbling sentry tried to stall for time with Guren-chan.

"Any troubles out there healing the sick and decrepit?" Kotetsu's smile was warm and inviting but the girl with light blue hair only ducked further behind the retreating back of her "master," the smug Oto henchman uncaring enough to miss her scowling features once the gate guards were safely ogling her hindquarters.

Izumo smiled and stepped up for his turn when he noticed the stunning young lady wrapped in a flowing battle kimono overlaying a brown turtleneck sweater.

It must have been Konoha's lucky day for attractive new faces.

"Hi and welcome to Konoha. What's the purpose of your visit?" Kotetsu gawked at having missed a short at the slender morsel smiling politely back at his partner's look of smug victory.

"Hi! I recently escaped the Kiri Blood Wars and I wish to speak to your Kage about asylum." The smiles promptly vanished from both of their faces as both turned to face one another with a raised fist poised above an open palm.

Beginning simultaneously, they chanted together, "Rock! Parchment! Kunai!... Shoot!" Izumo's shit-eating grin told the whole story as he turned back to extend a welcome arm to their latest visitor.

"Right this way miss...?" He was looking for something here.

"Haku. I am Haku Yuki of the now-defunct Kirigakure Yuki Clan."

~oOo~

At that exact moment, Shikamaru sneezed violently as his Trouble Sense started tingling along the nape of his neck. "Troublesome."

Troublesome indeed!

~III~

The dust was still settling as Hiruzen Sarutobi stalked through the underground caverns once held by his former comrade. The once dimly-lit corridors were ablaze now with extra torches and freshly-applied glow seals pointing out the recent havoc and devastation visited upon the once sacred ground of Root.

He passed dozens of chambers that were converted to holding cells, each one filled to the brim with shackled Root operatives sitting seiza, their unmasked heads bowed with their false faces clutched in defeated hands. Hiruzen had long since stopped noting the gaping holes punched through walls and doors, some still smoldering with the occasional flame. Moving past the tenth such group in twice as many seconds, Hiruzen was finally led to a comfortably-appointed office where his ANBU Commander was chuckling to herself behind her voice-modulating mask.

"I take it you are pleased despite Danzo making good his escape?" An angry hiss bubbled up through the laughter before the dangerous (disguised) kunoichi slapped a hardbound ledger to his chest, one of many judging from the piles and piles and piles of documentation being cataloged into evidence. Twitching his nose at the smell of burned paper, the Sandaime's eyes flickered over to a charred pile of ashes in the corner before perusing the pages of Keina's latest prize.

"It would have been much worse if his sacrificial flunkies managed to destroy more than a half years' worth of evidence." Dragon swept an arm around the hastily-gathered scrolls and ledgers. "I think he was counting on the Council keeping you tied up in proceedings until everything could be burned. You letting me take action immediately allowed us to flush him out and stop the purge."

His eyebrows rose higher and higher with each flip of the page until he handed the ledger back with a heavy sigh. Danzo had his fingers in many, many underhanded dealings. There were scrolls providing in-depth details of his schemes to weaken the Kurama clan, destroy the Senju over time, and, last but not least, wipe out the Sarutobi clan so he could claim both the jinchuuriki and Konoha. Worst of all, both of his advisors were heavily implicated in nearly three-fourths of Danzo's dirty schemes.

Hiruzen wavered but did not fall.

"How did I let it come to this?"

"Now is not the time for self-pity, Hokage-sama. There is much more to see before we get to that point." The old man looked up from his introspection and paled slightly.

"It cannot possibly get worse than this," he stated waving the damning evidence he'd glanced overwritten in Danzo's own meticulous script. This was only one of the many pieces of evidence no less!

The bitter chuckling from his masked avenger set his nerves on edge as he followed her through a now open hidden passage into another dimly lit room with an entire wall filled floor-to-ceiling with amniotic tanks. Hiruzen had seen fairly messed up things in the two wars of his youth but the eyeballs floating inside each glass tank nearly folded the seasoned shinobi in half.

The feeling only worsened when he found the ones labeled Fugaku, Mikoto and Shishui Uchiha.

~III~

It was another clear morning in the Land of Fire. Anko couldn't see a single dark cloud in the sky above her. After more than a few excruciatingly lonely weeks without her team of Gakis, she'd been reunited with them on a leisurely B-ranked diplomatic mission to a tropical island off the coast just northeast of Nami. To top it all off, she'd been brought into the Hokage's inner circle, so to speak, and it made her proud of the hard work it took to get to that point of trust with the old man. As her eyes raked over the excitedly chatting Yamanaka girl trying to talk the Nara boy into a coma, her eyes landed on the still-widening shoulders of her one-time adopted brother paying rapt attention to the hands of the man she wanted most to strangle with his own reproductive organs.

Her life absolutely sucked at that moment, but she had to play out the hand she'd been given.

A bright blue ball of chakra amassed in the old pervert's palm, the maelstrom of energy growling like some malignant animal despite its heavenly allure of raw power. From where she paced behind the group at a leisurely stroll (far too civilian-like for her tastes), Jiraiya's plan began to take shape in her mind.

He was planning to woo the boy with promises of powerful jutsu lessons. If the man taught him a single technique between Konoha and Nadeshiko he could legitimately claim Naruto as an apprentice and nothing said, "woo me" more than one of the Yondaime's signature moves. Hell, it was powerful enough a jutsu the jabbering girlie even stopped to ogle its scintillating swirl of pure energy.

That in and of itself was an impressive feat and Naruto had been drawn into the Sannin's orbit like a moth to an overly-bright flame.

Anko's face promptly twisted up in disgust as she bit down hard on several snarky options. She had already burned her bridge (while wrapping it in five-hundred B-ranked explosive notes) to Naruto and needed to be as cunning as possible over the next week. It would take at least three days to reach the coast at this pace and another four to five on the water to hit Nadeshiko Island meaning she had at least a week to scheme.

Plenty of time.

The scroll the Hokage gave her had been very informative but nothing clued her in like the small orange book sealed at the bottom of the document. Written in the pervert's own hand was his damning confession to all the elemental world wrapped up in his usual brand of smut.

Icha Icha Paradise: Island Bounty boldly brandished the escapades of a gallivanting man whore along the tropical coasts of not one but three of the "Big Five." In a collection of short stories, he'd hidden the truth of his philandering ways as the main character snuck into a village eerily similar to their current destination. The story painted a rose-colored tale of the wrongfully-persecuted hero as he outfoxed and escaped the clutching grasps of Amazonian women trying to chain him with their smothering laws meant to subjugate men turning them into breed stock. It showed a glorifying light on the hero's clever trick of delaying his capture through sheer brilliance and ritualized combat, the very method these women ensnared men to their way of life.

In short, the story made her nauseous and angry. She knew the truth.

The Nadeshiko were matrilineal meaning, for whatever reason, they gave birth to only more female children. In order to sustain their village, they needed to convince men to stay and marry them and that meant seeking out men to breed with. As they were a kunoichi village, normal men would never do. No, only the strong need apply.

The problem with strong men was that they tended to be strong-willed and Nadeshikan women would only submit to a man strong enough to defeat them in battle, meaning shinobi. Those that lost, lost their lives to prevent unnecessary rematches. This ensured more women with strong genetics but a miserable life for the captured male since the women of the Flower Village didn't believe in polygamy.

Once you were trapped, you were trapped for life.

Did men cheat (or try to cheat) on their wives? Of course, some did (the ones not worth much as a person at least). If you were strong enough to defeat the woman, it stood to reason that you could overpower her if she caught your infidelity, right? One would think so. Unfortunately (for those disloyal males), Nadeshiko was a village of highly competent assassins.

Men that cheated on their wives didn't live long enough to enjoy their adulterous ways. Most died shortly after the first child was born leaving a large population of young widows in Nadeshiko Village.

For Naruto, marriage to any kunoichi in Nadeshiko was a death sentence for his family line. The Uzu law section given to her by Keina included very specific instances where Uzumakis with powerful genes were literally bred out of existence when taken in by the village's overwhelmingly beautiful kunoichi. Whatever curse that caused the small island's women to bear only more women like themselves was strong enough to wash out Uzumaki genetics and that was enough to violate every clan protection policy in every ninja village on the planet.

Now if she could only get the Gaki to pay attention long enough to convince him of the danger his clan was in. He could refuse the challenge, village be damned, or just refute their claim to him once the duel was over. It would be a death sentence to the Konoha-Nadeshiko treaty process, but she could have cared less. The Gaki, despite the perv's jovial behavior, was her only concern.

Jiraiya swept him under one beefy arm and strolled right out the village gates with a shit-eating grin tossed for good measure in her direction. It was infuriating and, to make matters worse, every attempt to corner the boy over the next two days of walking when he was free of the white-haired freak left her chasing shadow clones.

Apparently, Naruto was aggravatingly adept at substituting with them without leaving telltale signs of their creation. Even her attempts to catch him literally with his pants down ended up with the Snake Summoner grinding her teeth in anger.

She was beginning to regret her rash actions that night in Istoria. Hell, she came close several times to breaking down and lying about her feelings for him just to get Naruto to sit still for two minutes. All she needed was two minutes to apologize and explain why she said what she did, and she couldn't even get that!

In desperation, she turned to the last person she'd ever go to for help with a guy of all people.

"Yamanaka!" she hissed out the second night of their trip. "I need your help with something."

~III~

Jiraiya smirked as the frustrated Tokujo huddled with her female partner in crime after the group set up camp for the night, Naruto's clones making short work of the task. It didn't matter to him what she did; there wasn't any way she could turn Naruto against him in time. Flicking his eyes back to the fresh campfire, they raked over the swirling mass of chakra resting in his godson's palm and he silently swore to himself despite the pained smile carved onto his face.

It took him nearly a year to learn this bloody thing and the boy mastered the first two steps in a matter of days. If he hadn't struggled with the first step, Jiraiya would have sworn the boy had been practicing before now. Mentally shaking off his green-eyed displeasure, Jiraiya turned his full attention back to helping him master the final step of the A-ranked raw attack form.

"Stage three is combining stages one and two to make a powerful sphere." Jiraiya compressed the sphere in his own hand, the orb pulsing with new light and life even as it shrunk in on itself. The growling whirr of energy took on a higher timbre and hummed to life.

Naruto's head whipped back to his lazily spiraling orb of power and his face scrunched up in teeth-gnashing concentration. His left hand gripped his right wrist as his fingers curled into hooks, sweat beginning to bead on his straining forehead as his own Rasengan pulsed, shrunk in on itself slightly, then began to flash and fluctuate as its speed alternatingly increased then decreased several times before stabilizing again.

Jiraiya smirked. The boy was close, very close. Two days of walking, demonstrating, and coaching and he was nearly there already. Another couple of days and he'd have the technique functional leaving them to develop power and speed with the jutsu; Naruto would need to be able to generate an orb one-handed in under one and a half seconds to be deemed "proficient." Mastery would come only when he could generate an orb in both hands in under one and not before.

He almost felt bad about what was waiting for the Gaki once they got to Nadeshiko. That lasted all of ten seconds before his memory of the overly-endowed group of dark-haired Amazonian beauties wiped that fleeting moment of guilt away. The kid would be surrounded by sensually-clad beauties for the rest of his life and, if his intelligence efforts were spot on, he'd win the hand of one of their fairest flowers to boot.

Hell, the kid should be on his knees thanking him for getting him out that damnable village to a place where he'll be protected and loved instead of hated and hunted. He only hated the fact that his duties kept him away from the village so much limiting his time with the boy.

At least this was one way for him to honor his father's wishes. He could remove Naruto from the incessant hatred of those worthless villagers and give him a little peace of mind. How many times had he pleaded with the Hokage to wreak havoc on the heads of the bastards that put the boy in the hospital? How many times had he tried to take the boy away from the village that hated him only to be foiled at the last minute? Not allowed to protect him, not allowed to take him someplace safe; it was enough to enrage a man to homicidal tendencies so Jiraiya had to find another way to keep him from becoming some brainwashed moron protecting a village not worth his tears.

It was while rereading some of his earlier releases five years or so ago that the idea came to him. He couldn't remove the boy but perhaps an influential enough ally could. Besides, if he got the Gaki far enough away, he could spend more time with his godson. Sure, he'd be mad at first but Jiraiya was sure he'd be forgiven once he saw how much better his quality of life would become.

At least he hoped the Gaki liked women… It made ratting out his last student's son to Marika and her village all the more worth it. He'd play the villain to keep the boy safe if he had to. The old man tried not to flinch as he debated Naruto's sexual preferences. What red-blooded shinobi would be upset by large-breasted shinobi models? Did he like women?

His doubt faded when he caught Naruto sneaking peeks between lessons at his blond teammate.

'Bah! Of course he did!'

His short-term anger was well worth it to see him safe. Besides, love could grow in the most unexpected of places and the boy deserved someone to share a life with.

With that final rationalization, Jiraiya pushed his concerns to the side, that brief nagging sensation that he might be doing something underhanded to his godson, and returned his focus to the boy's training.

~III~

Shizuka was moving throughout the village as part of her daily responsibilities, her head nodding graciously in response to the well-wishes of her comrades. As usual, her thoughts were brooding over the message response open in her slightly trembling hands.

Konoha finally responded. Konoha finally acknowledged their debt to Nadeshiko and were sending an emissary to meet the challenge.

She would finally get the chance to avenge her master!

"If the date on the scroll is accurate Lady Shizuka, they should arrive within the next week. We will need to finalize your-." The Amazonian warrior dwarfed her ebony-haired charge, both in height and womanly build despite the painfully tight uniform she bore proudly on a daily basis. Unfortunately, even her domineering presence could not divert the unwanted interruption in the annoying form of Kokuyō Okamoto to her conversation with the future ruler of Nadeshiko Island, his gaudy western clothes doing nothing to detract from his haughty glare and arrogant stature.

To his left hunched his trusted stooge, Ongorō, a large pot-bellied individual Kokuyō employed to carry his many expensive (and ultimately useless) puppets, the baggy trousers of shabbily-patched upkeep as equally disturbing as his always bare feet and chest. Despite his downtrodden presence, the man's chest and shoulders carried large slabs of muscle, needed as Kokuyō's laborer, across his deeply tanned body. If nothing else, he was obscenely loyal to his megalomaniac of a master.

Kokuyō was a puppeteer, although where he learned the art (presumably the Land of Wind) had never been adequately explained. The only son of a wealthy merchant family, he continuously wasted large sums of his family's wealth to purchase or manufacture increasingly elaborate puppets to wage battle against his favorite opponent, Shizuka. To date, he'd challenged her over ninety-eight times hoping to finally build a marionette capable of subduing her body so that he could marry her and, in nauseating turn, subdue the village of Nadeshiko.

To date, he'd logged ninety-eight sterling defeats.

Why Shizuka had never killed the fool outright Tokiwa couldn't fathom. Was it because she considered puppetry not a proper jutsu or combat form? Kokuyō was clearly weak having lost each match in sterling and rapid fashion so strength was not in his favor.

Did she take pity on the spoiled brat now grown petulant adult? They'd been at this annoying dance for years with him making zero progress towards his objective, each annoying defeat pushing the girl's affections even further out of reach. What's more, the aspiring tyrant's efforts only seemed to heap more and more shame upon his trusted henchmen as his master endured humiliating defeat after humiliating defeat. It was too bad that the loyal lapdog could not rebuke his master and help him find a more obtainable wife.

Did he even reside on Nadeshiko Island?

It no longer mattered to Tokiwa. She'd officially had enough of this fool's nonsense as she darted forward with her Shinogi-Zukuri singing proudly, the two-handed blade arcing gracefully above Ongorō's head forcing the mute to cringe in fear and drop the wooden puppet to the dusty ground. Kokuyō railed in anger both at the angry kunoichi and the cowering house slave.

"How dare you interfere with the sacred rite! I-I-If you do, then it's clearly my win!" His eyes had taken on a manic gleam that unsettled the seasoned combatant. "She will need to forfeit and marry me!" He promptly began to cackle uncontrollably.

That all ended when Tokiwa slammed her foot on the ground and an enormous stalagmite erupted from the street impaling the now worthless collection of expensive kindling.

"You forfeited that right long ago, and repeatedly since when the forgiving princess defeated your unworthy hide." The steel in her voice matched the cold steel in her hands as the stuttering lunatic opened his mouth to protest a bit too loudly once again.

An earth-shuddering crash was heard on the far side of the town square as two human-shaped objects launched into the morning sky fading rapidly off in the distance as a sparkle of light, Kokuyō's plan to implement the [Hundred Puppet Binding] as equally broken as his latest creation.

Tokiwa seemed immensely pleased with herself despite Shizuka's raised eyebrow. "You have more important things to focus on, M'Lady. Let us proceed to inform the Matron of Konoha's response."

~III~

Per his usual nightly routine, Naruto created fifteen clones. The first five took up station just beyond the tents and continued their Rasengan practice, the remaining ten moving out beyond the camp to take up patrolling stations. The entire time people were going about their peaceful nightly routines, Anko seethed.

Naruto and the old pervert were entirely too engrossed in their nightly training and sealing theory. They were getting way too close for her comfort and it was not looking good for their trip to Nadeshiko.

This would not do.

She nodded to the blond female who nodded once in return. Their agreement was one of mutual benefit; Anko got to corner the Gaki, and she promised to help her win out over her rival. Fair trade as far as Anko saw it and together they settled into the female tent for the night to finalize their plans.

Later that night, Naruto wrapped up his watch shift and, as usual being this close to the shore, was unable to sleep. At first, he found the restless sensation unnerving. The closer he got to the ocean the more energetic he felt thus the harder it was to settle down for the night. Unable (or unwilling with Jiraiya around) to train himself to exhaustion, he folded his body into a lotus position somewhere between the tents and his patrolling clones.

Closing his eyes, he tried to center his breathing and before long felt the familiar tug behind his navel leading to a very familiar sensation of falling inward. Opening his eyes, Naruto looked at the darkened night sky of his mindscape and inhaled the forest-laced air of Kyuubi's new playground.

An exaggerated yawn next to him, followed by the sound of a mouth smacking open repeatedly, caught his attention. Lying next to him was a wolf-sized nine-tailed fox, wolf-sized for normal creatures that is.

"How is it you sleep all the time in any location, but I can't shut my eyes for two minutes?" Naruto sounded annoyed but the fox chuckled with a back-popping stretch.

"Millenia of practice will work wonders for you, kit." Naruto smiled even as he reached down to scratch behind the bijū's ear with his left hand. The Great Youko's reaction was nigh immediate as the burnt orange head leaned into his hand as electric pulses raced down its spine forcing Kyuubi's right leg to spasm uncontrollably. The rumbling purring didn't hurt to lighten the mood either.

When he stopped, the now wide-awake chakra beast shook its body thoroughly before sitting down on its haunches with a heavy sigh.

"Remind me to kill you later for your impertinence, monkey." Though the nine-tails sounded haughty, Naruto laughed at the good-natured and on-going joke. "Just be sure to get the other ear next time," Kyuubi huffed out.

"Certainly, oh great one." The bijū merely cut its eyes to the smirking human.

"Have you considered my offer?" the powerful creature asked, its body trembling with the aftershocks of the rather pleasant awakening. Kami, human hands were perfect for reaching those difficult spots.

Naruto's eyebrows came together in concentration. "I would have to be sure that you wouldn't be able to hurt anyone. My life in Konoha is shit enough already without the dreaded Kyuubi no Youko terrorizing the population." He looked pointedly into the eyes of the attentive chakra entity. "We both know exactly who they'll blame for it."

While Kurama couldn't have cared less for the wastes of flesh calling themselves Konohans, the extra drama would only make life more unbearable for both the mighty bijū and its host. The boy was just beginning to reach tolerable levels of pitifulness.

"I'm sure we can come to an accommodation." Another small yawn escaped the fox's gaping maw as it settled down for its tenth nap of the day. "In the meantime, what are you going to do about the snake woman?"

Naruto blinked in surprise. "What do you mean 'do'?"

A single eye opened laced with sarcasm yet to be expressed. "She isn't going to stop, you know."

"I knooooooooooooooow," the accompanying sigh drawing out his response before his face firmed up. "But she's said everything that needed to be said evidently."

"Hold grudges much?" The bijuu's cutting remark nearly made his head explode. Naruto leaped to his feet in anger much to the fox's amusement.

"There are better ways to tell someone that you're not interested!" he roared. Kyuubi's guffaw nearly stunned him and before he could push words from his mouth, the fox's retort rocked him back into a sprawl on the soft grass beneath the large tree.

"And tell me how well did that technique work out for the pink-haired banshee you stalked during your second year at the Human Academy for Idiots?"

THUD.

He had nothing for that. In fact, the rapid reddening of his face told the fox exactly what it needed to know.

"You promised that we would never speak on that time ever again." Naruto's glazed eyes stared out into the enormously large copse of trees as he continued to glow beet red like one of the colored light bulbs hanging from The Cherry Blossom. The message, however, had been received loud and clear.

At the time he was still in Neji's class, forever and always to be known as "The Arrogant S.O.B.," he discovered (to his eternal embarrassment) the radiant beauty that was the pre-pubescent Sakura Haruno. He remembered her from a childhood playground incident and she'd only grown prettier through the intervening years. Unfortunately, her inner beauty had shriveled up to raisin-like capacity but the young Naruto, still in his "class clown mode" couldn't see past it. He spent an entire year trying to win her heart failing miserably the entire time, her often violent rejections doing little to deter him. Naruto actually winced remembering a few of the really painful blows he took in the name of love. It wasn't until the fox-hunt that year when a certain pink-haired male shinobi joined in on the fun that he'd changed his entire outlook on the Harunos, life (in general) and Konoha (specifically).

Kyuubi, as much as he hated to admit it, had a very valid point. He was mortified as the weight of his own behavior, as well as the many times he'd complained to Anko about why "Sakura-chan" rejected his love attempts for the broody Uchiha wonder. With a heavy sigh, he relented.

"Fine. I'll stop running away from her." Kyuubi grinned right before closing that single eye.

"Good. You will have a chance as soon as you wake up."

Naruto blinked in total shock. "Huh?"

His clarification from the Kyūbi came in a gust of wind that dispersed his avatar form in floating granules of light.

"That never gets old," Kyūbi mumbled out shortly before soft purring snores began to filter through the trees. Settling into a well-deserved rest, Kurama's eyes snapped open at the sound of a thunderous roar in the not-so-far-off distance.

Back in the real world with a curse for the fox on his lips, Naruto's eyes snapped open at the same time only to see a crouching Anko not more than an arm's length in front of him.

He blinked.

She blinked back.

"Naruto I-," she blurted out only to squeak in surprise when his arms shot out, grabbed her shoulders, then yanked her into a tight hug. With her chin resting on his left shoulder, the purplette's eyes began blinking rapidly as she tried to process what was happening.

"I understand why you did what you did." Anko swallowed as her mind began to shut down. "I'm sorry for putting you in that position."

Just like that she had a chance? After all the anger and frustration?! 'This was such bullshit and someone needs to bleed!'

He released her, stood up, then calmly headed back into camp without another word while Anko's mind began to reboot. He was clearly willing to forgive but it might take some time to "forget," as they say. Looking over to the other blond hidden behind a bush, an equally confused blond by the looks of it, Anko's mouth closed with an audible click.

"This doesn't negate our deal, Anko." Ino rose from her hidden spot and returned to her own tent. If she hurried, she might get another couple hours' worth of shut-eye before they got up and continued on to Hi no Kuni's only public seaport.

~III~

The rest of the journey along the outskirts of Haran Bay to Nadeshiko Island proceeded without drama. Once the boat launched, Naruto shied away from the destructive chakra manipulation jutsu (drilling holes into your transportation usually didn't end well) and spent his time discussing fūinjutsu with Jiraiya when he wasn't staring out across the water. Anko felt like she understood why but kept it to herself since the last thing she wanted was another confrontation with the large lizard that took a shining to Naruto.

There were too many sharp, pointy teeth in that mouth for her liking.

Word of his heritage (unfortunately) had apparently spread among the seafaring community and the crew took an immediate liking to the blond Genin. To call him a celebrity among the sailing folk would have been a gross understatement but the perks were nice; the entire delegation received half priced fares to Nadeshiko Island.

Though he was still grinding through the first book of the series, Naruto's discussions with Jiraiya quickly dipped into the realm of advanced sealing. Having read all ten books in the Konoha encyclopedia multiple times through clones, he had a wealth of reference material to pull from and he was working towards a very complex array matrix judging by the Sannin's impressed stare. Currently, he was reworking chakra storage seals drawing on some fairly interesting additions.

It didn't take Jiraiya long to realize what the boy was doing; he was building on Mito Uzumaki's chakra network design beginning with the individual chakra seal itself before adding in additional regulator and chakra conversion matrices. Naruto had added purification filters at both the inlet and outlet arrays in addition to the triune chakra conversion seal nestled between an overflow regulator seal and a parallel medical chakra array that functioned like a capacitor discharging excess medical chakra. Jiraiya noticed two discharge ports for the medical array but he couldn't see any indicators to explain where the newly converted healing chakra would be going.

It was a very complicated nest of both simple and complex seals arrayed in a multi-layered seal matrix that was several stages beyond what Mito had time to build before her death. Jiraiya was honestly impressed and said as much as he asked Naruto what he intended to do with something like this.

The boy's, "Change my reality," was just as equally stunning as it was cryptic.

By the time Naruto finished making notes on the hybrid chakra storage/ medical chakra discharge seal he called the "Phoenix Array," the ship docked in Nadeshiko only to be met by the village Matriarch, her protégé, and a contingent of fifty kunoichi.

Shikamaru let out an appreciative whistle at the show of power but refrained from his trademark opinion.

Naruto leaned into Shikamaru and whispered, "I guess Jiraiya's reputation has preceded him yet again." The snorting chuckles from his teammates and the T&I interrogator did little to appease the Sannin's boat-shuddering faceplant.

Quickly recomposing himself, the white-maned shinobi descended from the boat with his entourage in-tow, his geta sandals clacking to a stop a few paces before a dignified woman wearing a sun-yellow kimono bearing three stacked rings of a flower-shaped seal along the lower hem. While her brown hair had lightened with age showing the growing streaks of gray hair, she was lean of build and her striking green eyes were bright and attentive as the old shinobi bowed in greeting.

Naruto noticed as he glanced about at the veritable mini-army of incredibly sexy women armed to the teeth, that a great many of them had stunning green eyes including the quiet one wrapped in a body-and-face-concealing hooded cloak standing just to the left of and behind the dignified leader. He also noticed that the anger in her eyes never left as she focused her glare on his face sighing softly in disappointment, something the younger girl noticed and frowned (further) at.

"Greetings Marika-chan," the Sannin began with causing every woman within earshot to stiffen and scowl while the Konoha contingent facepalmed at his overly familiar address. The older woman's soft chuckle as she stepped forward to hug the pervert quickly dispelled the tension as many of her escort blinked in confusion.

With hearty laughs and more chuckling, the two departed arm-in-arm leaving everyone else no other choice but to follow along or get left behind. Naruto fell in behind his godfather only to find that the cloaked kunoichi quickly fell in beside him. His friendly nod was greeted with a derisive sniff as the girl's face turned away to watch the elegant back of her mentor.

"Smooth, lover boy." The Genin tried to ignore the earth-rumbling laughter of his unwilling companion. For whatever reason, the bijuu became increasingly more talkative after Opal and her brother returned to their realm. At the moment, it was beyond Naruto's willingness to care. At least the ball of anger was communicating even if everything came with a biting edge to it.

With a final heavy sigh, Naruto's mind began cataloging the extra chakra signatures as they walked along the paving stones to the village proper. Hidden by her hood, he completely missed the pinkish tint to the cheeks of what he understood to be his future opponent in these village negotiations.

~A Few Hours Later~

The considerably taller woman drew down on the obi as she looked over her charge, stern eyes noting the light pink dusting of the girl's cheeks.

"Do not let his rugged appearance and gentle manner sway you, Shizuka-sama. Our honor as a village remains at stake."

A terse, "Hai!" was the maiden's only response, Tokiwa's eyes narrowing in satisfaction.

~III~

Dinner, while laid out in feast-like fashion, was not a festive affair. Oh, everything was perfectly presented, the entertainment (Nadeshiko kunoichi – most likely – dressed in immaculate kimonos playing stringed instruments) gave flawless performances, and the conversation (while terse and unemotional) was minimalist at best.

All in all, it was a completely miserable experience.

Both Jiraiya and Marika, who were seated both in the middle of the table but on opposite sides with their apprentices next to them, noticed and took it upon themselves to lighten the mood.

"I hope time has been kind to you, Jiraiya-kun." The older woman's voice was soft and lilting, her almost musical tones pleasant to the ear.

The large man shrugged. "It took a lot to let go of the war's souvenirs. I found peace in my village's work."

Marika nodded with a sad softness to her eyes. The demands of one's village could bury a body if not careful. Marika had begun to notice similar shackles looping themselves around her student and hoped this challenge tomorrow could jar her loose from the self-imposed imprisonment of her heart. The girl had lost so much with Sagiri's death.

Naruto caught the heavy look from the village leader to the stone-faced, and admittedly very attractive young woman to her right and directly across from him. With the unnaturally serious Shika on his other side and the more talkative Konoha kunoichi on the far side of Jiraiya, he was left with little else to do other than glancing back at her cold stare or working through his own overly healthy plate of sautéed chicken and vegetables.

He decided to step out on a limb.

"I look forward to our challenge tomorrow in the hopes that it can bring our two villages closer." His smile was a tad overly-bright but his words were earnest. Neither did much to thaw out the angry young girl's emotions.

"Hope all you like. Tomorrow I will erase the stain left on my master's honor with your blood."

While Marika's face showed sadness (and her voice mildly rebuked the still angry girl), Jiraiya's face was stone blank. Naruto gave up trying to gain any insight from his unofficial teacher and looked back to the now scowling face with the piercing green eyes framed by gorgeous hair the color of midnight. Sighing for the third time in the day, he pushed past her stunning beauty and asked a simple question.

"What have I done to injure you? Tell me and I'll do whatever I can to make amends." Shizuka, as she'd been previously introduced, rocked back on her heels as her mouth gaped open.

"You mean… you're telling me you don't even know why you're here?!" Her voice was incredulous, her outrage apparent as disbelief spread from her face to the twenty other faces from Nadeshiko spread out among the large table. Each one of them had the same disbelieving look plastered across it.

Anko was doing her best to stuff her mouth with steamed shrimp (to keep her from laughing at Jiraiya's discomfort). "Ooooh! Shabu-shabu!" Jiraiya couldn't help the odd timing, his face twitching minutely.

As Shizuka opened her mouth to scoff at his ignorance and Konoha's treachery, her master's voice silenced her with a single word.

"It appears our efforts to ease the tension between our two villages have failed for the night. I hope we can put this decades-long issue to rest tomorrow, Jiraiya-chan. Please excuse us while I speak with my kunoichi."

Jiraiya's heavy sigh preceded his bow from the waist. Finishing his last saucer of sake, he rose smoothly from his kneeling mat, followed by his temporary team, and left the dining hall with Naruto a half step behind him as the boy bowed slightly to the still-stunned beauty with the heavenly body.

Once the Konoha nin were gone, the chamber erupted into chatter as the outrage flowed from her female corps of assassins in an emotional flood. It was Shizuka's next outburst that silenced them all.

"He doesn't know! He has no idea why he's been brought here!" Before the angry muttering could erupt into another cacophony, Marika raised a palm to still the throng.

"It makes no difference. The debt has been honored and tomorrow you will face him." Tokiwa spoke up on the far side of her charge.

"But what of the custom? Usually, men are aware of the risks when they enter into this." Marika's face remained unchanged.

"That is not our concern to deal with." She turned to her stunned apprentice and gently pushed her mouth closed. "Uphold our honor, Shizuka. That is all we can ask of you now. Should he win," several of her kunoichi scoffed at this, "...should he win, we will uphold our traditions." Her stern gaze raked over every female in the room.

"Konoha may not have honor, but the same will never be said of Nadeshiko."

All around the table, resolute women shored up their resolve and drank to the success of their village's princess. Even though she was not chosen by blood but by right of strength, she was their princess all the same.

Shizuka's eyes took in the plate's flower motif resting before her shapely thighs and nodded once in acknowledgment of her master's order. No one, however, noticed her anger shift ever so slightly from the naïve boy she would crush tomorrow to the arrogant bastard professing to be his master.

She would make the man suffer through his student even if she'd hate herself for it afterwards. Despite her smoldering rage at the man's cheek, how could she hate the student that held no knowledge of his master's debauchery?

It was a shame especially since she found him appealing in that dark blue kimono he wore to dinner.

~III~

"Are you ready?" Such a simple question from the white-haired Sannin. The angry purple-headed woman next to him made an angry leaking sound through her teeth.

"Probably as ready as I'm going to be," Naruto chirped back as he rose to his feet.

His black tank top hugged lean but densely-packed muscle matching the black metal gauntlets hugging his forearms. A wide leather belt dyed the same color with two rows of reinforced holes hung loosely through the loops of his equally dark shinobi pants. Checking the tape around his shins and ankles, he strapped on his black sandals and overlaid the metal shin guards, courtesy of Istoria armorsmiths and Uzumaki fūinjutsu, to keep his lower extremities protected. Patting down the two pouches resting over the sheaths carrying his punch knives, Naruto ran through the inventory in his thigh holsters to make sure everything was good. The last thing he checked as he rose to face his team was the old-fashioned forehead protector.

Today he'd leave the jacket and lower face mask off to prevent any doubts of him being the one in the arena. Today he would make his village proud.

Stepping through his comrades (with one final piercing look to the Sannin) and along the covered walkway from their chalet to the earthen arena, Naruto passively listened to their last pieces of advice as he centered his nerves and stilled his racing heart.

"They fight for keeps so don't let her get behind you. She'll kill you if given the chance."

"Don't underestimate their Gale Fist taijutsu…"

"Observe before you rush in and get us stabbed…"

"Never trust a troublesome woman trying to kill you…"

"Keep your eyes off her huge boobs." He paused at that one as did everyone else, no one surprised in the slightest that the old pervert was observant enough to deduce that she had a large pair. "What? It's a legitimate diversion tactic and hers are as big as Anko-chan's." 'Lucky bastard!'

They all shook their head at the old pervert and resumed the trip passing under the judging stares of over a thousand silent kunoichi.

His team broke off to join the village leader in the V.I.P. box while Naruto made the solitary descent into the hard-packed bowl that made up the arena floor. Attendants were busy clearing away the refuse from the celebratory demonstrations acrobats and entertainers left behind while they entertained the anxiously-waiting crowd.

There stood Shizuka waiting in her body-hugging kunoichi clothes, the form-fitting garments caressing every sinful arc of her slender yet curvy frame save for the rather large cutout showing a generous portion of her cleavage.

Naruto tore his eyes from her chest and frowned. Perhaps the pervert had something there.

"If you beat her, she will give herself to you. Focus first and rut later." Naruto promptly severed everything but the ocular connection. He didn't need the fox's distractions at the moment.

When the village leader began speaking to the crowd, he began slowly filtering his chakra into the earth at his feet, his eyes never leaving her face. For a second, he swore there was something there in her eyes other than anger, but it faded too fast for him to comprehend it. Soon, the moment passed and they both bowed to each other when prompted, Naruto's mailed hands coming up just under his chin in a quick prayer to Inari as his ears tuned into the last bit of the speech he'd ignored in favor of admiring his gorgeous opponent.

"…and now, for the honor of Nadeshiko no Sato and Konohagakure no Sato, let the challenge begin." Naruto's eyes caught movement in his periphery as the extremely tall woman claiming to be Shizuka's guardian stepped forward.

"The rules are simple. You two will fight until one of you is unable to continue. While death is not the desired goal of this challenge, it is a very real possibility. Do not count on someone stepping in to preserve your life. All forms of combat are permitted. Victory is achieved through knockout, submission, or death. If I order you to break, you will do so under pain of death. Are the rules clear to you both?"

Shizuka gritted her teeth but responded with a terse, "Hai!" Naruto nodded his head when the older woman turned his way.

"Very well then," she began as her hand chopped downward. "Hajime!" Tokiwa leaped backward as Shizuka wasted no time, Naruto noticing swirls of air around her shapely legs as she charged. Since his senses were screaming at him to move, he slid sideways using earth manipulation, a maneuver imitating ice skating along flat earth his clones called "rock sliding."

[Nadeshiko-Ryū: Kōha Reppūken!] Shizuka roared as her body shot forward.

It was a good thing he did move as the earth around where he was standing erupted into multiple cracks, some chunks flying outward in concussive waves as the burst of her energy blew the bangs from his face. Naruto glanced back to find a ringed crater of destroyed earth with Shizuka standing in the center of it.

He began cursing himself silently for not learning Katon jutsu when he had the chance. Deep in the back of his mind, Naruto could hear the Kyuubi howling with laughter and yelling out, "I told you so!"

'Thought I disabled that connection?!' The Kyuubi roared in his ears.

"Stop blanking out and watch out for-yeeeeeaaaaaaarrrrrrrgggghhhhh!" Naruto ducked under the wind chakra laced kick that would have decapitated him handily.

Pushing the snarky bijū's comments aside, he squared up his shoulders and responded to the arrogant smirk from Shizuka with one of his own. Making the Ram seal, he grunted out a hearty "Kai!" and felt the tension melt away from his body, the kunoichi's eyes narrowing as she watched her opponent roll the tension out of his shoulders.

"Now, we play for keeps," he snarled out. With a grunt, the brunette jumped high into the air as her right leg swirled with Fūton chakra once again.

[Nadeshiko-Ryū: Kōha Senkaigiri!] came the next roaring technique. It seemed as if every maneuver came at full volume. Naruto dashed forward fast enough it appeared to be a Body Flicker, his lead foot planting and pivoting his body around even as the slender girl's heel made another ridiculous crater in the ground. Naruto grinned and pushed four times the chakra into his first attack than necessary.

[Bofū Kyouzū no Jutsu!] he whispered silently, a torrential surge of air exploding from his palm knocking the girl off-balance and sending her ass-over-tea-kettle across the hard-packed ground. At first caught off-balance, Shizuka tucked her legs in and rolled with it springing back up to her feet with surprise reflecting briefly in her eyes.

'He's another wind affinity!' Things were getting interesting. 'Too bad I have to kill him.'

She drew two kunai and charged them with wind chakra before dashing forward. Naruto responded by drawing his punch knives and reciprocating, the two weaving a dangerous dance of blades as both sets of weapons clashed again and again. Ducking, slashing, weaving, lunging, the two flowed around each other for a dozen feints and ripostes, demented grins adorning both faces as hissing blades bifurcated the defenseless arena air.

With a final explosion of wind chakra, both fighters leaped backward to take stock of any damage. Shizuka smirked as she saw a clean slash across his stomach that opened up his shirt to reveal more of that lean muscle she'd noted with approval before their match. Her happy grin fell with confusion when her opponent's cheeks turned a bright red and he lowered his forehead protector to cover his eyes.

The crowd gasped, both at his bravado for fighting blind and for the reason why he did it. She was about to sarcastically question his intelligence until a stiff breeze blew across the field and made her left nipple stiffen with the cooling sensation across her sweaty chest.

It was a sensation that should not have occurred as her uniform wicked moisture away from her body as part of the material's design. The only reason why it would…

Her eyes shot downward to catch the clean diagonal cut across the left side of her chest, a sliver of red liquid marring the inner slope of her generous mound and her tiny peak standing at full attention. It wasn't the only tear in her garments, but it was the most… telling. With a shriek, she threw an arm across her breast and drew out several shuriken with her unimpeded hand.

Shizuka leaped into the air yet again and roared out her next technique.

[Enbu: Ni no Dan!], she roared. Her body began to spin like a top as a torrent of kunai flew outward towards her now stationary (and blindfolded) target.

Naruto, who had been mixing his chakra with the air around his body the moment he covered his eyes, could feel the blades displacing the air in a ten-meter bubble. Pushing more wind chakra into his weapons, he began an almost snake-like dance, the resounding clang as blade after blade ricocheted off of his punch knives leaving the landscape littered with redirected metal.

When Shizuka landed, she was greeted by the sight of an unharmed Naruto amidst a ring of sharp-edged death, the only word rummaging around in her head was, 'Impressive.' She instead decided to hide her approval of his skill with more angry taunts; she needed to get him to lose focus and make a mistake.

"Did you get an eyeful, perverted student of a perverted master?" Even behind his makeshift blindfold, Naruto's left eyebrow twitched angrily in response. "Stop fleeing like the coward you are and face me!"

In response, Naruto sheathed his punch knives (something that raised many an eyebrow at the sheer audacity) and assumed a more defensive posture with the majority of his weight resting on his rear leg. Lifting both hands chest high with palms relaxed and open, Shizuka stood there for a second while his head cocked to the side.

He was listening.

Smirking at what she considered to be her advantage, the green-eyed beauty slowly lifted the kunai held in her hand and let fly watching as the weapon multiplied with soft puffs of chakra. Her haughty smirk dropped the moment her opponent flicked his fingers, almost like flinging water from his hands, and slender shafts of solid earth shot upwards like fingers to casually punch the projectiles off course. Forgetting about her torn chest armor, she began flinging more shuriken with both hands.

Naruto deflected it all with more jack-in-the-box type shafts of earth and the occasional short wall produced by his foot stomping on the hard-packed arena floor. It continued until she drew back her right hand to send another barrage while simultaneously reaching for another with her left – only to find her holster finally bone dry. Deciding to hold on to her last weapon, the now frustrated kunoichi charged forward to engage her barely damaged opponent.

Nartuo, feeling the vibrations of her soft footfalls, stepped forward and shifted his stance to a more aggressive one, his body leaning forward as his left foot slid into position. Once his foot stopped, his flexed both arms crossing them in an odd guard pushing downward towards the earth at his feet.

The ground ten meters in front of him receded just enough to trip up Shizuka's left foot causing her to stumble and fall to one knee, her hand reflexively flinging out the kunai it held catching the blindfolded male apparently by surprise as the blade embedded itself in his chest up to the handle.

The audience let loose a collective gasp.

Naruto's mouth opened in shock as the stunned girl began to raise her hopes in pulling out a last-minute victory. Truth be told, she had nearly run out of tricks and she'd definitely run out of kunai not expecting him to be as skilled as he was.

Then the Naruto in front of her exploded into a ball of smoke as two pairs of arms burst out of the ground to wrap around her waist and legs while a pair on either side grabbed her arms. A few minutes of futile struggling proved that she'd only succeeded in getting stretched out and pinned to the ground as a knife-edged hand pressed gently against the base of her neck.

Shizuka's eyes grew surprisingly large as her situation became abundantly clear. She'd lost the duel. To add insult to injury, he'd done what no other opponent had succeeded in doing since she began her life as a kunoichi: he'd taken her back.

Her body released an involuntary shudder as her adrenaline peaked, one that brought another heated flush to the face of the original standing over her.

~III~

Naruto sat alone in his quarters enjoying the silence. He'd tried to speak with Ino after the match but she wouldn't even look at him.

Not wanting to be bothered, even by the very anxious Anko as the words coming from the V.I.P. box after the match echoed over and over again in his ears.

Two Hours Before a Really Good Soak in his Personal Onsen

'Prosperity and loyalty between the villages… blah blah blah… with this union of our strongest warriors in wedded bliss…' Huh? Did he hear that correctly?

Naruto stood there dumbfounded as Jiraiya smiled down at him like some buffoon. His eyes shot to the kunoichi standing at his side, one arm still covering her partially-exposed bosom while her head hung in defeat. Apparently, it was some tradition among these crazy women, but she wasn't arguing against anything being said. If anything, she was blushing even heavier than before.

Another glance around the stadium and he saw mixed reactions on the many faces staring awfully hard in their direction.

Shikamaru's shocked expression was to be expected but Anko's nervous lip-biting told him that she had something she considered important to talk about. Ino's face… well, he couldn't explain the odd of mix of shock, betrayal, and anger. It made his spine tingle in a not so good way.

Most of the Nadeshikans appeared to be pleased although there was a fair share that looked… jealous?

None of this made any freaking sense! He really lost it when the no longer angry kunoichi stepped closer and grabbed one of his hands with whichever one she wasn't trying to hide her colossal chest with.

Pre-Onsen Flashback – Kai!

His door opened without so much as a "panty raid" alarm, the same woman that tried to end his existence not three hours prior standing an arm's length away in a pretty yukata after having closed and locked his door.

That did not bode well.

"No one teaches manners in Crazy Flower Lady Town?" His quip was received with a wry giggle. 'What the… since when does the Ice Woman giggle?'

"I bet she makes all sorts of interesting sounds when she's not trying to murder you. What say we find-." Naruto abruptly cut every connection with the ero-kitsune.

"There are no secrets between husband and wife, Naruto-sama." As far as he was concerned, she was far too comfortable with that title far too quickly for his tastes.

"How many times do I have to tell you I'm not-." She slapped a hand over his mouth to silence him.

"I'm not here to discuss our wedding plans, future husband." His eyes narrowed dangerously. "I'm hear so that you can take responsibility for your reprehensible behavior today and render the proper first aid."

That said, she dropped the small first aid package onto the bed next to him while comfortably straddling his lap. Naruto's face erupted into a healthy shade of red the second she flung open her garment to reveal a perfect breast (her right hand expertly kept that side of her body covered) the size of his head, one of which carried an angry razor-thin cut on it. He tried very hard not to gape at the flimsy black panties that rode high up on her hips showing more curve than any skimpy piece of cloth should ever be allowed to.

Sliding down onto his lap, she picked up the box and tapped it gently against his chest. "Make me better," she paused deliberately for effect, "future husband."

He tried to lift her from his lap but she'd anchored her knees to the bed using chakra and he only succeeded in ruffling the coverlet.

Growling despite the frustration he felt, Naruto profusely denied that he'd ever marry someone he didn't love but began gently rubbing disinfectant on the pillow-like surface of her chest all the same.

He was stubborn after all, not stupid.

~III~

The next morning, a very disappointed Konoha group started the journey back home trying to figure out how to tell their Hokage that Nadeshiko Village swore they'd join up fully with the Village Hidden in the Leaves… just as soon as Naruto consummated his marriage with Shizuka, something he vehemently swore wouldn't happen.

The treaty alliance appeared to be on hold for the foreseeable future, much to the pleasure of one Ino Yamanaka and one Anko Mitarashi.

~III~

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Omake: Elemental King of the Mountain

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It was another good morning for training. Konoha slept securely, the odd cat scrounging around for the inattentive morsel, the odd mongrel barking at his passing. Most of the great village slept soundly unaware of their faithful protectors out and about on their morning routines and that was exactly the way it was supposed to be.

It would be foolish to believe that the sweating Genin from Team Ten was the only lunatic up at an unholy hour conditioning his body to amazing feats of strength. His many laps around Konoha's fringes disproved that misconception as his burgeoning sensory abilities detected scattered chakra patterns through the various training fields none more familiar than the Sublime Green Beast and his mini-clone. It was the way of those driven to hard work and the grinning shinobi accepted that reality as he did his own inhuman training regimen.

As Naruto Uzumaki completed his twenty-first lap around his sleepy hometown, his machine-like pace staggered to a stumbling halt as a series of memories pelted his mind in rapid-fire fashion. He stood there covered in a light sheen of his own sweat as another barrage, accompanied by the angry curses of the dying clones, rocked his confused brain. A particularly vitriolic memory spurred him once again into motion, the night air whisking past his whiskered cheeks as he took to the rooftops in a beeline for a specific section of town.

'What the hell!' he thought in utter confusion, shock, and… entertainment? It was mind-boggling even to his own chaotic skullpan so he rushed onwards back to Training Area Ten. It was where he'd left his army of clones do to their elemental affinity training after all.

Despite receiving the dying memories of a fair number of his clone army, he was not quite prepared for what greeted his near silent return.

Stepping out from between two trees to get a better view of the field, he was greeted with utter mayhem in the form of small-scale clone warfare. The ground itself had been torn asunder in patches. What wasn't covered in mud was scorched by either fire or electricity judging by the isolated burn patterns on the grass.

Naruto sighed heavily knowing that it would take some time to restore the training field to pristine condition before his team showed up for their meeting but his curiosity as to what was happening got the better of him. So, he plopped down in front of one of the trees to watch what was going on.

He noticed a few things almost immediately, the stray clone death contributing immensely when it came to sorting out what his doppelgangers were doing to take each other out in their vicious war of attrition.

From what he could gather, the rules were fairly simple. All of the clones worked together to create a towering cone of earth in the center of the field, the prize of the entire conflict as it were. Standing five meters in height, the sides were perfectly smooth while the top was sheared flat, the surface just wide enough for three clones to stand within arm's reach of each other. Climbing to the top of the structure, and staying there, was a testament to tree climbing. Fighting on any surface while maintaining dominance required moderate to advanced chakra control.

The goal was simple: Be the group with at least two members atop the smooth pyramid at the end of allotted time. While simple to state, it was more difficult to achieve with the field aflame with sporadic bursts of elemental energy.

No jutsus were allowed. No taijutsu was allowed unless it was required to support your specific form of elemental manipulation. "Killing" a clone was allowed so long as it was an elemental attack that did it. Combining all of those rules together, you ended up with massive bursts of elemental chakra littering the field as clones learned to brute force the finer points of elemental control.

There were five opposing teams, each team allowed to use one and only one form of elemental affinity to fight with. Observing the dwindling number of clones, Naruto noted some original use of each particular elemental affinity with the Raiton group fairing the poorest of the bunch. At best, they could release bursts of electrical energy to either blind or "taser" their opponents, meaning they had to get very close to do it. A few could "juice up" their movement in short, straight-line bursts of speed but the end result sometimes left them dazed (like staring into a photo flash) or singed (if they used too much). A few were trying to stretch their senses to detect the electrical pulses generated by brain signals, something difficult to do with shadow clones given they were pure chakra and the pulses were weaker simulations generated by their chakra brains. Despite its short range and effectiveness when surrounded by enemies, this also put them at a distinct disadvantage with the Doton group despite their elemental advantage. It was a disadvantage he understood once one of the earth users near the "mountain" got taken out by a water whip sending its memories to the original.

The earth users were strengthening their outer shells using earth chakra as a control and endurance training exercise, no surprise there. What was a surprise was how they were leaking their chakra out into the surface layer of the ground allowing them to detect in a perfect circle, something the vaunted Byakugan couldn't even do, the faint vibrations of shinobi as they darted around the combat field. Their chakra acted like a fine array of spider webs providing a scarily accurate picture of where their opponents (and allies) were allowing them to maximize use of their second primary ability; they were using raw, unadulterated manipulation of earth to send slender spikes of earth up from the ground and into clones dispersing them; they were tilting or flipping small slabs of earth (within ten meters requiring huge bursts of chakra) to either throw off balance or smash clones between dual slabs; or one clone was stomping angrily on the ground ejecting melon-sized balls of rock that he could launch with controlled bursts of chakra like short-ranged missiles. It was brutally effective and allowed the Doton group to quickly take control of the battlefield and surround the "mountain" with three of their members coordinating from the top.

It wouldn't take long at the rate they were crushing the opposition as the clone population dipped below four hundred rather quickly. He did note several manipulation skills that would someday pay dividends if his clones could master them.

The Suiton group had learned to coat their bodies in a thick layer of water to help divert heat from the Katon group's ability to eject flame in short bursts from their hands and feet, a pleasant surprise from one clone trying futilely to catch a Fūton user. The wind elementalist was sprinting away perched by a single foot atop a swirling ball of wind, almost like a high-powered sled, when the Katon wielder shot out a fist straining with all his might to burn the aggravating antagonist. His success stopped him long enough for another earth wielder to puncture him and promptly distribute his knowledge to every other clone, making the Katon group grin maniacally and the rest wince with their added range of about two meters (think fire breathers at any circus but from the end of someone's fist or foot).

Things were going splendidly, as far as Naruto could tell, until a stray ball of wind shot out of the tangled mess of clone arms and legs in his direction. Eyes swelling with shock, the cursing Genin uncoiled his body like a spring rolling frantically to one side narrowly dodging the exploding ball of chakra-laced wind. Oh sure, it wouldn't have done more than plaster him into the tree he'd been using as a rest stop, but the sensation would have been far from pleasant.

The clone responsible for the errant attack came to an abrupt halt, his hands shooting up to cover his wide-open mouth as he swore. The grimacing shock on his face told it all but, before he could shout a warning to the battling clone legion, an expertly-crafted earth lance shot up into his chest dispersing the distracted mass of chakra.

The added benefit was that the clone's recent shock at nearly pummeling their progenitor unconscious replicated to every other clone on the field bringing their impromptu turf war to a screeching halt. Every blond head whipped over to make sure he was okay.

Naruto deliberately rose in a slow, methodical manner, his hands brushing away the dirt he'd picked up in his hectic scramble for safety.

"Don't stop on my account," he mentioned as he intentionally retook his seat in full view of the war zone. "In fact, let me make this a bit more interesting."

Naruto unsealed a special scroll, the only one he carried covered in a sunset orange carrying case marked with a very special seal. Over three-hundred-and-fifteen pairs of ocean blue eyes followed his every move, almost like loving puppies watching their owner unveiling a particularly potent treat.

Every clone knew what was in that scroll.

It was the holy grail of Naruto-dome, his emergency scroll of super-duper emergency ramen rations – including at least twenty bowls of Ichiraku's Super Naruto Special Ramen with triple pork and double egg portions kept in perfect stasis.

"The vanquished get dispelled to try again next week. The victors get an early treat with me, the Boss." Naruto actually enjoyed the moniker and, while his clones usually didn't stick around long enough to eat, he knew that they did get hungry and being a good boss meant taking care of your minions.

Unsealing an alarm clock and setting the timer for fifteen minutes from then, the blond Genin leaned back against the tree trunk and smirked. This was better than any elemental tor-, er, training session he could have devised.

"Time starts now gang. You have until the alarm sounds, and… Go!"

Naruto grinned as his clones proceeded to unleash hell on one another with new purpose. Sometimes it was good to be the king.

~III~

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[Jutsu Used In This Chapter]

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[Hyaku Kugutsu Tamashibari] - Hundred Puppet Binding: After having their target destroy ninety-nine of their puppets with each puppet driving a "bolt" into the target, the destruction of the hundredth puppet allows the user to effectively take full control of a person's body in a similar manner to the Puppet Performance: Skilful Achievement with a Human Body technique without the person's cooperation. This technique may cause pain to the victim.

[Nadeshiko-Ryū: Kōha Reppūken] – Nadeshiko-Style: Roaring Gale Chop: By covering one's own hand with wind-natured chakra, the user attacks the enemy with it. The force of the strike is great enough to produce a powerful shock wave that can cause noticeable fissures without direct contact.

[Nadeshiko-Ryū: Kōha Senkaigiri] – Nadeshiko-Style: Hardliner Revolving Cut: The user covers one leg with wind chakra and delivers a powerful falling kick to her opponent. This kick was powerful enough to slice through a mechanical puppet.

[Bofū Kyouzū no Jutsu] – Gale Surge: A defensive jutsu at best. The user distills the air around him or her with his or her chakra and at the exact moment of attack releases a large burst of air. The blast of wind goes out three feet and knocks a victim back at least five feet and can stop projectiles. It is a defensive move that is usually used when the user is caught off guard. The wind can only be released in one direction however, requiring a short pause while the air pressure around the user normalizes before it can be used again.

[Enbu: Ni no Dan!] – Dance Performance: Second Step: The user spins around at high-speeds, appearing like a small twister. While doing so, the user will launch a large barrage of kunai to several targets at once.

~III~

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A/N: So, Jiraiya's actions it would seem, while not entirely honorable, weren't necessarily spawned from selfish desires of preservation. Whoddathunkit? Does that make him any more or less despicable? Please review and let me know what your thoughts are on what he's done and why he did it?

Also, I never liked the way canon portrayed Kokuyō. The guy has baby Gundam mechs while everyone else is using wooden puppets?! Get the f-… He still got his rear kicked but I nixed the advanced technology. (I never understood why Shizuka was depicted in the series killing all her other challengers but let him live.)

I'll admit, the rest of this section came and went getting rewritten several times. I figured it best to knock the whole thing out in one extra-long chapter to make up for the long delay in posting this (3 weeks, sorry for the wait). I hope you enjoyed the show despite its slow sections.

Next up: the final stretch to the Chunin Exams!

Will Hiruzen live or die? Will Orochimaru and Kabuto escape justice to continue their dastardly schemes? Will the Umihebi turn Naruto from his self-destructive path? Will Naruto and Ino ever pull their heads out of their collective rears and get together? Or will Shizuka tear the two apart? Review and provide your thoughts as I mastermind the chaos! Muwahahahahahaha!

Soo many questions left to answer…

~Siva'a-tasi