How are we all doing from that last chapter? Considering that I'm starting to write this chapter after finishing the last one, I'm doing absolutely great.

Year Two: This Life

Two Years Ago - Wakanda's Palace

Imanu's no stranger to the palace getting attacked. When he would be working in the mines, a part of his training had to do with the drills associated when the palace was compromised. They'd stop all current operations, get as far from the vibranium as possible, hide until it's clear, and don't hesitate to switch loyalties if needed. Anything to stay alive, right?

But now it was different because he was in the palace as a suitor when Princess Iqadi was pounding on their doors to get them out. It was different to see Princess Iqadi in this position. He always saw her as a diplomatic figure, enhancing and brightening the royal and Wakandan image. Imanu didn't watch her fight because he couldn't. She ordered them to stay safe so he did. Besides, he would die if he went out there.

Then Iqadi almost died in front of them, to save them and her home. In that bunker, blood was shed, secrets and true loyalties were revealed. Secrets that would change the course of his time at the palace…

"So Chike is a traitor and Imanu is a labourer genius who also does stitches," Femi states. "Anyone else with secrets?"

Some time after the attack, the suitors were left alone after being tended and cared for. It didn't take long because they didn't need it as much as Princess Iqadi. Until she fully recovered and rested, Imanu and the remaining suitors passed the time with each other, mostly sitting in one of the libraries since that's where they know the staff doesn't cover much.

"I'm not a genius..." Imanu mumbles.

"Oh come on…" Femi mutters. "We all almost died and our princess almost died at the hands of someone we thought was one of us. If she never showed up in the bunker, he could've slaughtered us. So, come on, everyone come clean if they still have to."

Abioye sighs, leaning back in his chair and looking up. "I plan to stay but ask Iqadi not to marry me."

The rest of them are silent. It'd be weird to stay without wanting or even aiming for the reason why they're here.

Imanu clears his throat. "What reasons, if you don't mind me - or our - asking."

"I have a girlfriend at home. Secret. My parents didn't know which is why they agreed with Iqadi's parents to have me as a suitor."

Again, silence. Nobody knew what to say about that. Enough rules were already broken.

"So, you're going to tell Princess Iqadi," Zuberi says.

Abioye nods. "I owe that to her. Look, my parents explained the protocols to me in case this were to happen. Once Iqadi is well enough, she's going to offer us the chance to leave as an apology for putting our lives in danger. It's not an official rule but a gesture."

"A man who quits cannot and should not lead."

"The palace goes through this more than we know," Femi says. "Our princess almost died for us and not because one of us is her future husband but because she would've done it for a stranger. We're more or less still strangers but she's that person. The real question is, when do you draw the line for how much of this life you could take?"

-o-

Present Day - Wakanda's Palace - 12:10 PM

Iqadi lost track of how many days it's been. All she's aware of were all the crying, cramping, screaming, and the medication she's taken. For a while, she's been in the hospital wing, seeing doctors and nurses rotating. Imanu's been at her bedside, holding her hand in both of his near his face. She doesn't remember a time he let go or left her side, but he had to at some point because he changed his clothes. He was likely forced to do so. Her parents and Imanu's parents, not Kili because they weren't sure if she was old enough to see this (Iqadi preferred her not to be here), were nearby.

The only words she remembers hearing were: I'm sorry, Princess, the baby is gone.

The baby. Not her baby. An attempt to calmly sever ties and draw detachment.

Even when she was discharged, those words echo in her mind. Each word bounces from one end of her skull to the other, intensifying to the point of being deafening. It distracts her from the cramping in her sides, torso, and back which could go away with the pain mediations provided to her, but she didn't want it. She wants to be in this pain everywhere. She deserves it, right? Those plans she made created guilt that killed the baby. Poisoned her womb and everything.

Iqadi leans her head against the bedroom wall. It's hard for her to exhale since she's congested and swollen from the non-stop crying she's been doing for a while now. The only reason she stopped now was because she's too tired and drained from everything. She looks ahead at her surroundings which isn't much. This used to be her bedroom but she had everything removed and now she feels as empty. She couldn't bear to look at anything from that night.

Iqadi looks up when she sees Imanu walk through the open door, stopping at the doorway. They lock eyes and she notices how drained he is. When was the last time he slept? He's been worried about her since he blacked out in her arms in a state of delirium, she's been told. The last thing she could remember was hearing him screaming and then waking up in the hospital next to him. Imanu pauses before taking a few steps towards her. She notices that his walk is cautious and gentle as if she's about to explode in his face … which she can't blame him for because it's happened before.

But it wouldn't happen now because she has no more energy.

"Just when something good happens to us, it gets taken away," Iqadi whispers loud enough for him to hear. "The irony is that we're both the bringer and the taker of our own burden. We're truly our own worst enemies."

Imanu keeps silent, unsure if he should approach her.

"I hope the baby enjoyed the short time it had. I barely had time to spend with him or her. I've been nourishing it and then it got taken away."

He's still silent. Iqadi looks at him, crossing her legs but keeping her eyes on him.

"You didn't ask for this life," Iqadi continues. "I asked you to join it. I brought you here but I can take you out."

"I said yes to it," Imanu responds. "I know you need me now more than ever because I need you as well, more than you know. I can love you forever but it will hurt both of us in the long run if that's how long you choose to blame yourself. It wasn't your fault, Iqadi, and I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I let you continue to believe that case."

"But that is the case. I'm not blaming myself because it's my fault. All I've done was pour my burdens on you. Those plans that I wasn't even allowed to ask for your help with and now I could kill my friends and leave their children orphaned. I brought you into this life where your life got completely warped and now it took your baby away."

"Our baby, Iqadi." He sighs, taking a seat beside her. He takes a moment before looking at her. "I was a part of those plans and the baby so they're not just your burdens. They're ours. Remember, those plans are hidden away and there are ways out. That's why you asked me for help, remember? You need to stop asking me to leave because I won't say yes to that. You asked me on our wedding day, our newlywed phase, and now. Iqadi, when are you going to realize that I'm not going anywhere?"

Iqadi looks at him as he holds her hands. He kisses them, hiding his sad smile but keeping the gesture.

"We're all suffering, Iqadi," he says softly. "You know I won't forsake them and I will never forsake you. I said yes to this life and those plans but, first and foremost, I said yes to you."

A single tear falls from Iqadi's eyes and she leans on his shoulder. She's always wanted to be strong enough to break her own heart and maybe this was that moment of power, but she got someone who could work on making her forget her heart was ever broken.

"I think the Panther God cursed me for the plans…" Iqadi mutters.

"I thought he cursed me for when I suggested stopping tradition," Imanu responds.

"I guess we're both cursed for breaking rules. He must hate us now."

"So now what?"

"As you said, we'll get through this." Iqadi reaches for him and cups his cheek. She's watched his heart shatter but he still grappled to hold onto hers. "Are you okay?"

Imanu stares at her for a second. When he reaches to hold her hand against his face, he breaks down sobbing and she pulls him into her arms so they could hold each other.

A snippet from this chapter was used in the SHIELD Academy sneak peek from Emily's story.

Iqadi's Counterpart - Chapter 12: The First Time