Chapter 2 – Taking Action
The next morning, Nathan and Allie were up and out early. They had planned on fishing and were gone shortly after the first rays of light had broken. Once they got past the rowhouses, Nathan looked at Allie.
"Are you okay?" Nathan asked.
"Just thinking." Allie said.
"Want to talk about it?" Nathan asked.
"I was just thinking about last night." Allie said. "I saw the way that Mrs Thornton was when you carried her into the house. She looked so content and happy sleeping in your arms. It just made me wish for a second."
"Allie." Nathan said.
"I know. I know." Allie said. "It is just hard sometimes, especially when I have been babysitting Little Jack. He asked me why I don't have a mom and I told him that she died when I was about his age. Then he asked if my mom is with his dad in heaven. I told him that I hoped so."
"I am sorry." Nathan said. "But you handled it well. Mrs Thornton had told me he was asking questions."
"That wasn't the end of it." Allie said.
"What else did he ask?" Nathan asked.
Allie looked down as they were walking and kicked at the rocks in the path. She was trying to figure out the way to say what Little Jack asked without hurting her dad.
"Allie." Nathan said. "I am okay. Nothing you say will hurt me. I just want you to not have to carry whatever burden you seem to be carrying."
Allie let out a huge sigh.
"Fine." Allie said. "When Little Jack put it together in his little head that he had a mom, but no dad and I had a dad and no mom, he looked at me all innocent. He then asked if he could share my dad, so he could have a dad and then he offered to share his mom with me. I tried to tell him that he would have a new daddy soon when his mom married Mr Bouchard. The minute I said that, he took off crying and I had to chase him down in the backyard. I finally got him calm and asked him why he reacted like that."
"What did he say?" Nathan asked.
"He said that he didn't want to be around Mr Lucas." Allie said. "When I asked him why, all he would say was that he was mean and not nice to his mom."
Nathan stopped Allie and pulled her into a hug.
"I am sorry you had to deal with that." Nathan said. "Would you be willing to talk to Mrs Thornton about that? I am also proud of you for trying to handle that, when it wasn't something that you should have had to deal with."
Allie returned the hug and then stepped back from her dad.
"Thank you." Allie said. "I know that he doesn't understand in his mind, sharing parents is simple because we each have one. I just feel bad that he is scared of Mr Bouchard. I mean just saying that man's name, sent Little Jack running scared."
"I will deal with that later." Nathan said. "Let's just have a nice morning fishing."
They went the rest of the way to the river in silence, each thinking about what had been said.
…. …. …. ….
Elizabeth woke in her own bed, still dressed in her clothes minus her shoes. She had no idea how she got there. The last thing that she remembered was sitting at the schoolhouse grading papers and thinking about Nathan. Speaking of Nathan, a smile came over her face. She dreamt that she was in his arms and could feel his heartbeat. It was a wonderful dream and hoped that she could make it come true.
Little did Elizabeth know that it wasn't a dream and Nathan had carried her from the schoolhouse to the car and then from the car to her bed, all the while her hand on his heart when he held her. She would have been so embarrassed if she knew the truth, especially how she gave a contented sigh and slipped her hand to rest on his heart.
Elizabeth got up, washed up and changed her clothes. She then checked in on Little Jack before heading downstairs. He was still curled up with his plush mountie that Rosemary had made him for Christmas. Elizabeth smiled as she watched her son, completely oblivious of what had happened the night before. After a few moments, she headed downstairs to start breakfast. When she got downstairs, she saw her basket sitting on the corner of her desk. It wasn't where she usually put it, so she wondered how it got there. She would figure that out later. She needed food, she was much hungrier than usual.
Elizabeth got breakfast ready, left it warming in the oven and then woke her son. Once they had breakfast and were dressed for the day, Elizabeth knew that she had things that she needed to take care of. The first order of business was leaving the letter for Nathan at his house. They walked down there and knocked, but no answer so she left it stuck in the door jam. Once that was taken care of, she headed into town, with Little Jack in tow. She didn't have a babysitter, but she needed to take care of a few things. So the first order of business was a stop at Bill's office.
"Hey Bill." Elizabeth said. "I was wondering if you could keep an eye on Jack here for a little bit. I have to take care of something and he refuses to go near the hotel."
"Sure." Bill said. "I can take a break and play with him."
"Thank you." Elizabeth said. "This shouldn't take long."
Bill nodded and waved his hand as Little Jack pulled out the blocks that Bill kept in his office for him. Elizabeth left and headed to the saloon. She had seen Lucas's car and even though she didn't want to speak to him, she would if he was there. Bill had noticed she wasn't wearing her ring, but he wasn't going to say anything. He was going to let Elizabeth come to him since he had said plenty and she knew how he felt about Bouchard.
Bill got down on the floor with Little Jack and started building a tower, asking him about his time with Allie. He knew that Allie had been babysitting for Little Jack most evenings now as the wedding was getting closer and Lucas had announced his run for Governor.
…. …. …. ….
Elizabeth left Bill's office and headed toward the hotel. She walked in and saw Lucas speaking with a couple of men that she knew to be political people. She didn't know all their names, but she had seen them with Lucas before since he had stood up to Belfour. She went over to the bar area and stood where she knew that Lucas could see her. She waited for him to come over, since she wasn't going to interrupt him. If it took too long, she was just going to leave the letter, because she just wanted it over with so she could tackle the other items on her list that she had started to put together when she had made breakfast that morning.
It took Lucas over ten minutes to excuse himself and come talk to Elizabeth. She was getting frustrated and was close to just leaving the letter. She had kept her left hand hidden since she had stepped on the boardwalk.
"Hello." Lucas said. "Sorry about that."
"Can we talk in private?" Elizabeth asked.
"My office?" Lucas asked.
"Lead the way." Elizabeth said.
Lucas wasn't sure what was going on, but he had a bad feeling. Elizabeth was being distant and she seemed upset. He had no idea what he had done to upset her this time. The moment that they got into the office and the door was closed, Elizabeth turned and looked at Lucas.
"I know that you are busy." Elizabeth said. "So I will keep this brief."
"I am sorry." Lucas said. "We will have more time after the election."
"No we won't." Elizabeth said. "Especially if you win. I have made some decisions. You chose to do this without asking me and just expecting me to go along with it. Hope Valley is my home and will always be my home. I am not leaving it."
Lucas looked at her and was trying to figure out what she was saying. He thought she was on board with the election and moving to Capital City.
"What are you saying?" Lucas asked. "If I win, or as my advisors say – when I win, we will be moving to Capital City."
"I am not moving." Elizabeth said.
She then pulled out the letter and handed it to him with her left hand.
"Everything is in the letter." Elizabeth said. "I can't do this anymore. I need a partner who is supportive and understanding of my dreams, my wants and my needs. Not making decisions and expecting me to go along with them. My father did that to me and it has cost him dearly for it."
Lucas looked from the letter and her hand to her face, confused. He refused to take the letter, so Elizabeth stepped around him, set it on the desk and then stood back.
"Everything is explained in the letter." Elizabeth said. "The ring is in there as well. I am sorry. I can't marry you. I hope that at some point in the future, we can be friends, but at this point, I just want you to leave me alone and if you can't do that, I will take legal action."
Elizabeth then turned and walked out of the office and hotel without looking back. She went straight to Bill's office. She refused to let tears fall because she wasn't all that sad that she was breaking things off with Bouchard.
…. …. …. ….
When Nathan and Allie got back to the house, they found a letter to Nathan. Nathan immediately recognized the writing. He handed the stringer of fish to Allie.
"I know that we caught more fish than normal, but can you clean them?" Nathan asked. "I need to see what this is. Once they are cleaned, you can put them in a covered container and in the fridge."
Allie took the stringer of fish and headed out back. Nathan took the letter and fishing gear, heading inside. Nathan knew that the letter was from Elizabeth. His heart leapt after what had happened the night before, but he was also still trying to be cautious. Once he had put the fishing gear away, he sat on the couch and looked at the letter in his hand. He closed his eyes and said a quick prayer. He knew that whatever was in the letter would possibly determine his future and that of his daughter.
Nathan slowly opened the seal and pulled out the folded sheets of paper. He opened them and started reading. He couldn't believe what he was reading. Elizabeth was breaking things off with Bouchard and admitting that she wanted to give them a try since it had always been Nathan in her heart. She said how she didn't want to leave Hope Valley because it was her home and the only place that she could see herself living and raising a family. She had underlined family.
Nathan didn't even hear Allie come and put the fish away as he was so engrossed with the letter. Allie saw that her father was not paying attention to her. She wondered what was in that letter, she had thought it looked like Mrs Thornton's writing, but she wasn't sure. At least he didn't look upset, confused maybe, but not upset. She left a note for Nathan letting him know that she was going into town to the library and then to her shift at the telephone exchange. Allie then left the house, leaving Nathan time to think.
…. …. …. ….
Elizabeth got back to Bill's office to find them playing on the floor. Bill looked up when Elizabeth walked in.
"You okay?" Bill asked.
"I will be." Elizabeth said. "Are you busy or can you keep Jack for a bit? There is something else I need to do and I don't have a babysitter today."
"We are good." Bill said. "If we aren't here, we will be at the cafe. I can bring him home later. I have supper plans with Nathan and Allie. They promised me a fresh fish."
"That works." Elizabeth said. "I will try to be back, but I don't know how long it will take. I need to go talk to someone and we have a lot to talk about."
Bill nodded.
"Just don't break his heart again." Bill said, with a knowing smile.
"I will try." Elizabeth said. "I am actually more worried about him breaking mine."
"Good luck." Bill said. "Us boys will be fine."
Elizabeth nodded and walked out of the office. She saw Allie go into the library, so she headed there. When she got to the library, she didn't see Nathan.
"Allie?" Elizabeth said.
"Yes, Mrs Thornton?" Allie said.
"First." Elizabeth said. "How was fishing? Second, where is your dad? I need to talk to him."
"Fishing was great." Allie said. "We caught enough that we will be able to make supper for Uncle Bill and probably have enough to have fish tomorrow as well. Dad is at home. I was looking for a couple of books before my shift."
"Thank you." Elizabeth said. "Congratulations on the fish. I will leave you be. I will go find you dad at home. See you later. Oh, Bill has Little Jack, in case he finds you."
"Thank you for telling me." Allie said. "Have a good day."
"You too." Elizabeth said.
Elizabeth left the library and took a deep breath. She went the long way around, so she didn't have to walk by the hotel again. She knew that Lucas wasn't happy that she broke off their engagement, but she had to do what was right for her. She had to finally listen to her heart, because not doing so hurt more.
Elizabeth slowly walked toward Nathan's house, trying to figure out what she was going to say. She knew that she had said plenty in the letter, but she also knew that she needed to say it. For him to hear it from her. She was afraid that he would reject her after all the hurt she had caused him. On the other hand, she was also still fearful of moving forward with him. She felt like she was stuck. She couldn't be with Lucas and she couldn't leave Hope Valley, but at the same time she was still afraid of losing Nathan like she lost Jack.
She finally got to the house and stood outside afraid to knock, so she was startled when Nathan opened the door.
"Elizabeth." Nathan said.
"Hi." Elizabeth said. "I saw Allie in town, she said you were home. I was wondering if we could talk?"
Nathan took a step back, and motioned for Elizabeth to come in.
"Yes." Nathan said. "We need to talk."
Elizabeth took a seat on the couch and saw the letter on the low table. Nathan paced back and forth on the other side of the table.
"I see you found the letter." Elizabeth said.
"Yeah." Nathan said. "I actually saw it last night when I found you sleeping in the schoolhouse. I didn't touch it then, other than to put both envelopes in your basket."
"You found me at the school?" Elizabeth said, confused.
"Yes." Nathan said. "After I got back from a long ride after leaving you, Allie wasn't back so went looking for her, knowing she was babysitting. She said you hadn't come back yet and she had already put Little Jack to bed. I went looking for you as I was worried something had happened.
I found you at the schoolhouse, sound asleep. I tried waking you, but you wouldn't wake up. I called Lee and had him bring the car. I ended up carrying you to the car and then to your room once we arrived at the house. Rosemary followed me up and was the one who got you ready for bed."
"Oh." Elizabeth said.
She blushed as she thought about things and realized it might not have been a dream exactly.
"I am sorry if I said or did anything while I was asleep." Elizabeth quickly said.
"It is okay." Nathan said. "Though you may have questions from Rosemary, if she hasn't cornered you already."
Elizabeth ducked her head, wondering exactly what she said or did. She shyly looked over at Nathan and saw a bit of color on his cheeks as well. Elizabeth took a deep breath and tried to calm her thoughts so they could get through the things they needed to talk about.
"Do you have any questions for me?" Elizabeth said. "I mean about the letter."
"Did you mean it?" Nathan asked.
"Yes." Elizabeth said. "With all my heart. I have been running from my feelings for long enough. I can't keep doing that. When you confronted me yesterday after school and asked me what I wanted, something in me broke and I realized I had to stop running and face things.
As I said in the letter, I am sorry for everything that happened before. I have broken things off with Lucas and would really like to see if there is still something between us. I mean I think that there is, but I don't really know. I know I would like there to be. We are good together. I can talk to you, even when I can't talk to others about things. You let me talk about Jack. You are patient with me. Lucas has never done that or wanted to hear about Jack.
You care enough to come looking for me and make sure I get home. I just wish we could go back a couple of years and start over. When I thought you died and then ran to you, hugging you in the street, I knew I loved you. But then the fear kicked in. Both you and Lucas being gone didn't help. When he came back, I can now see he twisted things and fed into my fears, driving a wedge between us before we had a chance to work things out. I am sorry I let fear take over. I had been ready to go to you and tell you that it was you I loved when Lucas twisted things and drove me back to that place of fear."
"What did Lucas twist?" Nathan asked.
"When he came to me the morning after he returned." Elizabeth said. "He said you couldn't put me through that again and it was better to just not try. Lucas said he was worried that you were going to hurt me since you were so broken yourself."
"I never said anything like that." Nathan said. "I had been talking to Bill the night before asking if it was fair to ask you to love another Mountie. I was worried about you and wanted to make sure you would be okay. I never talked to Lucas. He must have been eavesdropping on my conversation. It also wasn't the first time he has twisted things I said. I never called him out on it, but looking back, I should have. I am sorry I wasn't stronger back then to speak up to him. It was just so hard to talk around you as it was."
"I am seeing that now." Elizabeth said. "I should have spoken to you and not taken Lucas's word for what you said. I was so confused and then after that, he just kept up the pressure. He would interrupt us and not leave me alone. Yesterday, when I was thinking back over everything since the hug, I saw Lucas's manipulations and how he pressured me into dates. How he never shared things with me. How he never actually spoke to me and cared what I had to say. I am so sorry I hurt you.
I can now see clearly, you were always there supporting me and willing to listen to me. You cared what I had to say and how I felt. I can especially see it these last few months since Rosemary had her baby and I haven't been spending as much time with her. I think she fed into what Lucas wanted. She is my best friend and I don't think she did a good job of pushing me to really think about things, but just accepted that Lucas was my choice when he was the one pushing the relationship when all I wanted was some time to figure things out. It was Rosemary who pushed me to accept the invitation to Union City with Lucas. When I wasn't sure about Lucas, it was Rosemary who pushed me to accept his invitations. I am so sorry."