first fanfic goin crazy, not really good at them so expect the dictionary definition of mediocre in written words (exactly five thousand eight hundred of them), my sense of humour is gonna carry this so hard that it will have back problems before i do irl (im not a funny person), without any further ado, introducing a fanfiction that kinda has some connections to how i met my girlfriend irl (i am gaslighting you into thinking i was this charismatic) anyways, stay beautiful yall
A guard does their usual salute to welcome me into Liyue Harbor. I wave back, but that's as much as a usual interaction goes. It's not that I have nothing to hide, it's a simple reason, really. I just prefer to stay anonymous and plain. I'm nothing more than a normal citizen of the city of Liyue, or at least that's what I put myself out to be. To make it simple, I keep a lot of things personal. Unless I truly trust the person I talk to, next to nothing about me comes out. I do wonder when there could be an exception...
A young woman is standing outside a building, waving her hands around and pointing at the same building. "Come one, come all, to the Wangsheng Funeral Parlor! Are you in dire need of a coffin? Need to send a loved one off? Then you found just the right place to go, hehehe~"
I look over to the (uncharacteristic to a funeral director) bubbly young lady. She looks a bit too enthusiastic to be selling coffins. I mean, if it sells, more power to her.
She catches a glance with me, and beckons me over. "Heyaaa~ I'm the director of the Wangsheng Funeral Parlor, the 77th in fact! You can call me Hu Tao. Hu as in 'WHO put me in this coffin?' and Tao as in 'I can't geT OUt!', hehehe. Would you perhaps like to purchase a premium coffin? Two for the price of one if you purchase one now~!"
Gods, or Archons I guess, this girl is a bit too forward with the idea of death. She is... cute, though. Unorthodox businesswoman with a dark sense of humour? Sign me up. I set that thought aside for now, perhaps I could converse with her instead of buying anything.
"Well hello, Hu Tao. I think this is the first time I've talked to you. I'm not that interested in purchasing anything today. However, do you think it's okay if we just talk?" I say that last part a little too quietly, and I almost sound shy.
"Oh? You want to strike up a conversation with me? Wellllll, you don't look like a creep, so I'll bite. What do you want to learn about the great director? Or maybe you're a future client..."
"No no! I just happened to see you, and I was compelled to start a conversation with you, if that's fine. I suppose if I had to start with anything, I'd like to ask how your day has gone so far."
"I'm just buzzing byy~ just a regular day in my life. But you didn't answer my question... you're not going to be one of my future clients, are you~?" It dawned upon me, to what she meant by a "future client". I almost sort of jumped back a little in stupefaction.
"W-woah... I'm not here for that!" She giggles at my flustered self trying to not sound awkward after the implied comment. Of course, she has no intention of doing that.
"Hehehe~ well aren't you just fun to tease! I don't think I've caught your name yet. To whom do I owe the pleasure of talking to~?"
Normally, I would just go by a different name. But I felt as if I'd be fine with letting her know my real name. "My name is (name). I don't think I'm that interesting of a person, though." Hu Tao puts her hands on her hips and shakes her head side to side. "Nonsense! I'm sure you're a very interesting person! Would someone who thought you were boring still be talking to you right nowww~?"
She does bring up a valid point. She's been the one initiating all of the conversation so far. Perhaps she could be a good friend. "Well if you don't mind me asking any more questions, do you have a favorite colour?"
"Hmmm... if I had to choose, I would say a deep crimson... oohhhh~ it not only symbolizes the heat everyone radiates with, it's also just a very pleasant colour to look at. Plus, it matches with my outfit~ don't you think?" She says that last part with a twirl.
I stop to take a look at her outfit. It's primarily black, but the crimson highlights do bring out the outfit a lot more. I can definitely see why it's a pleasing colour to look at, and I stare at the intricate details of her clothing. From her hat and the flowers that are on it, to her shorts, everything looks professionally made and tailored. However, I end up stopping my observation upon looking at her tantalizing legs. I internally smack myself on the back of my head for having those thoughts.
"Well well well, I see I've met a little pervert, hehehe~" She says with a playful smirk on her face." H-hey! It's n-not like that... I'm sorry for staring a b-bit too long though, it w-was an accident."
She doesn't seem affected by my accidental ogling at all. If anything she just laughed it off.
"W-well, I suppose I can ask another question. Do you have a favorite food?"
"Lalala~ steamed fish with a side of prawn dumplings!" Hu Tao says gleefully. "I love it so much I could just sing about it, hehehe~"
I've never been the biggest fan of seafood, despite the large impact it has on Liyuean culture. Whether it be crab, shrimp, or fish, there's just a weird texture to it that irks me the wrong way. I'm not here to judge her food choice, though.
"Interesting choice, I think I'd enjoy some grilled chicken thighs with a soup to go with it." Nearly drooling, I keep talking about my favorite food. "The soup perfectly compliments the chicken! Maximum savouriness!"
"Of course your favorite food is thighs, you couldn't stop looking at my own, hehehe~"
"HEY! I SAID IT WAS AN ACCIDENT!" I say with a flushed face.
I only have time for one more question, and I almost feel sad that I have to leave. Although most of the conversation was me getting flustered over my own actions, I enjoyed talking to Hu Tao.
Taking a little breather, I ask her my final question. "A-anyway, I only have time for one more question before I have to get home. Do you have a favorite time of the year?"
Hu Tao takes a moment, before responding. "A favorite season? Ooh, it would definitely have to be autumn. Let's keep that a secret though, okay~?"
I nod my head. "Of course! Your secret's safe with me!" Taking a look at the sky, and seeing that the sun's already on the horizon, I prepare to leave. But not before asking Hu Tao another question.
"I guess I lied, I did have another question. Do you think w-we could... talk again sometime? I enjoyed the little conversation we had today." I find it difficult to look at Hu Tao directly, and I'm bracing for the worst possible outcome.
However, that never came. And the answer that followed most definitely surprised me.
"Of course I would! You've been quite the day changer, hehe~" Hu Tao says with a bright smile. "Whaddya say we talk again tomorrow?"
I responded with a smile bigger than I realized. "I'd love that!"
"Hehehe~ then it's settled! I'll see you tomorrow~" Hu Tao says with a wink.
I wave and take my leave. "Take care!"
Unbeknownst to her, I do not have a place to sleep. I am a resident of Liyue by proxy, but I do not own a house or living space. Mora is difficult to keep a hold of, and I end up finding myself empty-handed a majority of my time. I take commissions from the Adventurer's Guild, but they can only pay so much. The land owned by the god of currency, ironic how I have nearly none to my name. Eventually, I found a well covered area. I find a corner and lay down on my side. It's about as uncomfortable as you think, but it's about as much as I can deal with. I find myself slowly losing myself to tiredness and I finally slump and head to bed.
-(next day)-
The next morning comes and I nearly faceplant on the ground, forgetting that I literally slept on a ledge not that high from the ground. That aside, I remember that I have plans to talk to Hu Tao today. Perhaps I can learn a little more about her, and maybe likewise if she can earn my trust. My stomach stops me before anything, and my wallet stops my stomach. I only have enough to afford maybe a fried egg or two, so I head to the nearest restaurant: owned by an middle-aged man, a young lady with blue hair, who I assume to be his daughter, and a tiny panda.
Walking up to the restaurant, I take a seat at one of the stools in front. "Hello there, could I get two fried eggs please?" The man nods his head and states the price. "Of course, that will be 200 mora." Reaching into my pockets, I give the man the last of my mora, and he returns to the kitchen.
The smell of eggs drives me nearly mad with hunger. I can hardly keep the saliva in my mouth as I start drooling at the thought of two perfectly cooked eggs. Glistening with a golden glow, and soft enough for it to just melt into your mouth, even the most simple of foods would be a gift from the gods. After a few minutes, the man, along with his daughter, exited the kitchen and brought me the food I ordered.
The daughter speaks up with a proud smile. "Here you go sir, your two fried eggs are ready! The rest of your food will be done shortly."
"The rest? I only paid for the two eggs though..."
It's only there that I hear a snicker from behind me. It's none other than Hu Tao, who had ordered extra food for me.
"W-why did you do that, buying extra food for me..." I say with a frown, knowing I probably won't be able to repay her.
"It's on me, don't worry~" She says with her hand on her chest, showing that she expects no repayment.
Her face suddenly turns a little melancholy. "Normally, I take walks late at night. And, I had n-noticed you sleeping outside, and looking extremely uncomfortable. I wanted to at least make sure that you wake up eating well! Someone as nice as you shouldn't be in a terrible situation like that..." She says that last part with a frown, the first time I've seen her frown since I've met her.
Embarrassed, I show her my gratitude for her thoughtfulness. "Thank you, Hu Tao. I am very grateful that you went out of your way to help me." With a genuine smile and giving my most heartfelt pose, Hu Tao jolts a little in embarrassment.
"I'm just doing what I thought was r-right!" Hu Tao winks at me, and takes the seat adjacent to mine.
"Did you get food for yourself?"
"Nah, I already ate earlier. I had taken a morning walk when I noticed you at the Wanmin Restaurant ordering food! I just had to take the opportunity to make your day! Hehehe~"
Hmm, so that's what this place is called. I couldn't find a sign so I just assumed it didn't have a name. The place feels lively, so I might make this a regular stop for food. "Regardless, thank you. It means a lot that you cared enough to buy me food." At this point, the next time I say "food", I might drown in saliva. I dig into my eggs.
The young female chef comes back to the booth we're at and puts the rest of the food on the table. "Here's the rest of your food! I hope you enjoy it!"
Hu Tao waves before the chef heads back into the kitchen. "Thank you, Xiangling!"
The chef, who I now know as Xiangling, smiles at the two of us. I look at Hu Tao. "Do you know her?"
Hu Tao continues, "Oh, Xiangling's a riot! Only a little 'Boo!' and she jumps, she's so easy to scare! Being in the industry that I am, I just love these kinds of people the most. Gotta keep it in check though, in case Guoba ends up toasting me instead." Is Guoba the panda? Probably.
And as quick as the food came, the food left, with me devouring every last plate of food. I don't consider myself a glutton, but with food smelling this good and me not having a meal this tasty in a while, I'll let it slide. Hu Tao just laughs at my poor manners. I didn't even realize how messy I was, I was far too hungry to care at that point. With every plate and bowl empty, Hu Tao leaves a generous tip of mora to the restaurant.
She sighs in slight boredom. "Come on! We gotta find something fun to do! Sitting around and doing nothing is a fate worse than death..." ...is that a funeral joke? With that, the two of us take our leave to walk around the harbor.
"Say, whaddya say we continue our conversation from yesterday?" She asks with a hint of playfulness.
"Oh! Of course! Can I ask you one first?" I say, to which she nods yes. "Alright, what is that thing that's on your back? It almost looks like an amulet."
"Oh, this thing? Yeah, whatever... I... kinda don't know why I got it, but it does come in handy." She shrugs.
That amulet... it looks like it has a flame emblem on it. Perhaps it's a means to control the element of fire? I've seen people use elements to defeat monsters. It's glowing with a warm hue of orange and red.
Hu Tao's eyes widened with bewilderment. "You don't know what a vision is? Maybe you don't even know you have one! I'll check for you, hehehe~"
Hu Tao takes a quick look around my body, trying to locate the vision that I probably do not have. She walks around me looking around my upper body. She then crouches and forcefully rotates me to see if it's attached to my lower body. She hesitates a little when she is directly in front of me, a slight hesitation but she gets up with a fake cough.
"Any luck finding my own?" Hu Tao shakes her head no. "From what I've seen, nope. No vision yet, but it's never too late to acquire one, y'know? Perhaps you might get one soon!"
"I wonder, if I got my own vision, would it also be fire, like yours? Then we could match!" I say with a little smile.
Hu Tao spins around in fascination. "Oya? Oya Oya~? To have a vision that matches with wittle o' me? That's sweet of you to think that, hehehe~"
Stopping, she looks at me directly. A little dizzy from her spinning, and she asks me a question. "Okay. So tell me, (name)... are you not from this world?"
HUH?
"You don't seem to be familiar with a lot of the popular spots in Liyue, I don't think I've seen you much, and your clothes look very foreign! You didn't even know what a vision is! So... are you not from this world?" A serious face is present on her, and I'd feel like I'd be punished if I didn't answer truthfully.
"Promise me that this is a secret between the two of us, okay?"
"No worries, I'll keep it a secret! I won't tell anyone else in all of Liyue! It'll be our little secret!" A knowing face on her means she means what she said.
"Okay... yes. I am not from this world. But I have absolutely nothing malicious to do here. I just wanted to change my life from the one I had before."
"Wow! You really aren't from this world? I've had visitors from far away, but none that were from a whole different world!" Her eyes beam with excitement. "You have to tell me more about you!"
With one of my biggest secrets now known to her, I give in. "I suppose I can tell you more about my own world, but it's not as happy as you would think. Their terrible situation is precisely why I moved to this one. They have no intentions on solving it because no one is powerful enough to take on the burdens of the world all at once."
Hu Tao stares in bewilderment. "W-what do you mean?" I continue with my explanation. "It's very technologically advanced, but conflict is always present. Those conflicts can range from area disputes to even trivial matters like who's got the better food. It's definitely a show of power, for more of the wrong reasons. I'd rather not get into the details, as it's... very gruesome."
I look at her, who's now staring at me intently. She looks a little down knowing I came from the same world. Realizing how forward she was on knowing about me, she instinctively jolts back, which is something she does a lot from what I've noticed. "Eek! I hope I didn't t-touch on a sensitive topic. I can't imagine the kind of atrocities that might be taking place in your world, so yeah, I won't press you for the details."
"Thank you, but I think it's time to lighten the topic. I'd like to know more little facts about you. What about your favorite book genre?"
Hu Tao says with a suddenly heartwarming grin, "A favorite book genre? Hmm... it would probably be horror. Well... if you count poetry, me and my home slice Xingqiu are quite the versemongers when it comes to poetry. Buttt, if you don't count poetry, then yeah, horror. I don't really care for the gore that much though, I think it's all too cheap. Just a quick scare, not much more..." Wait, did they just say "home slice"?
"Honestly agreed. If it can only leave you tense for a moment, then it's not horror, it's shock. There's supposed to be a buildup! The tense and unease definitely make horror a top genre for me, but I lean more into the historical fiction genre."
Hu Tao tilts her head to the side a little and raises her eyebrow. I find her actions adorable. "Oya~? Historical fiction, huh? Are we talking fiction set in real historical times, or like a historical fantasy kinda thing? Normally, hearing history bores me to death, I blame my consultant for that one..."
I've got a massive grin on my face now. "Ouch. Well, most of the stories are sort of based off of historical figures from my world, some of them being my favorites. I have a few, but to explain them would take ages."
"Oh, darn~ hehe, I understand. In that case, just tell me why you like these historical figures! No need to go too deep!" Hu Tao puts her hands under her chin.
"Alrighttt, fine. I'll talk about one of my favorites." I say this next part with a fake-narrator voice. "Legends say he was able to create his own army and defeat a whole nation! He then conquered all the villainous regions and died peacefully. His story is so powerful, because he started out so small. But with his never-empty confidence, he built to become so powerful!"
Hu Tao's eyes are beaming in admiration. "Oh, wow... such an unwavering belief in oneself... he truly must have been quite a person."
I'm suspicious of sarcasm, and I narrow my eyes at her. "Are you one-hundred percent sure you're actually interested? Hmm..."
She goes defensive and waves her hands around to explain herself. "Honest to Archons! The way you're explaining it makes it sound wayyyy more interesting than Mr. Zhongli. This person you're talking about seems to be very cool though!"
Why does she have this habit of saying names to people I don't know? However, me actually making the conversation interesting is a nice change. I'm practically talking with a wide smile. "Exactly, there are many stories about him, some fabricated but some are true! The crazy stuff he did to achieve victory is amazing!
Hu Tao giggles over how happy I sound. "(Name), I like your enthusiasm! It's very endearing."
That comment caught me off guard. Not enough for me to sound less confident, but I stuttered a little and blushed at the comment. Hu Tao just giggles again at my embarrassment. "Th-thank you... Hmm, do you have a favorite instrument?" Satisfied with my book talk, I decided to change the topic again.
Hu Tao responds with a smug grin. "Apart from my aspiring side-career as a rapper, I like the guitar. It always struck a chord with me, hehehe~"
I deadpan at the pun. It was funny, but I saw it coming the second she made that face. She notices my unamused face and laughs.
"Hehehe~ welll, whenever I get the chance, I just like to sit down and play a little. My friend Xinyan is so much better at it than me though. I think it's very calming, and my fingers are always itching for a challenge, especially with these nails I have. How 'bout you, what would you say your favorite instrument is?"
"I adore playing the piano, having my fingers flow onto the keys and create musical masterpieces gives me such a warm and happy feeling!" I say that last part with a bit of a dramatic flair. "To change the topic again, do you like any particular places in your world?
Hu Tao looks at me with a contemplative look. "Hmm... ohh, I do have a favorite place! It's a quiet little spot in the very north of Liyue, called Wuwang Hill. Whenever I get the chance, I'll take my walks through the forest there and sing a little tune or two~. Now you tell me your favorite place in your world!"
This one is a very difficult question to answer. There are a lot of places that give me a very peaceful feeling. I eventually make up my mind.
A forest is honestly a safe answer. "There is a forest in my world that borders an ocean, and the scenery and greenery are just a sight to behold. The beautiful shades of green and blue go together quite well! By the way, I love your hat! It's very cute! I would love to get me a hat like that." I made a BOLD move saying that, Hu Tao gives me a bewildered look at the sudden compliment.
Even in the short moments of awkwardness, she bounces back in a calm and collected manner. "Hehe, it's very comfortable! It's easy to wear and very sentimental to me. I think you'd look absolutely adorable in it!"
Obviously, I blush as-per the compliment. I can never seem to take them well no matter what. Hu Tao leans in closer slightly with a curious look. "Well, I've answered all your questions, but I have one more for you~" My interest has piqued with her question. "Would you become a vision wielder if you were given the opportunity?"
Another question where I genuinely don't know the answer to. Simply put, I had never even known what they do, let alone think about possessing one. I really wonder, the process of getting one, or maybe there's a contract to this! What if I die if I'm away from it for too long? What if I get hit with an element super effective to me? Do I take double damage? I pray internally that this isn't like a certain game about collecting monsters"
"I wouldn't mind becoming one, however, what is the process of acquiring a vision?"
She responds a little quicker than anticipated. "You must have a strong will and be motivated (hehehehehe funny dmc reference berry delight). I personally don't know the rules behind getting one, but I do know that you must be extremely ambitious if you want to be granted one.. Hehe, I wonder..."She once again gets closer to me, I'm starting to feel the pressure of our proximity. "What element do you think fits you the most? I can't quite get a complete read on you sooo~ I'm gonna go with hy-"
I accidentally interrupted her. "I didn't tell you, but my favorite season is winter, so maybeee an ice vision! But I love the warmth of people's happiness, so... maybe fire?" TWO THINGS. ONE. I did NOT just say that, corniest shit ever. And TWO. Am I speaking my thoughts aloud? "If I had a fire vision, we could match!"
Hu Tao giggles a little at my enthusiasm. "Oh, you're just precious! Whatever vision you get, I think I could get used to fighting beside you, and I think we would match perfectly!" She must have noticed the implication, and she covered her face while blushing. Damn, she is cuter by the second.
To be completely honest, I really enjoy her company. Hu Tao feels like a breath of fresh air compared to the life I was living before and even here for a bit. Is this... what having a true friend is like? To be honest again, I kinda see her more as a friend... do I have a crush on her? Woahh, is that too quick? Should I say something about it? But I really like her! I would love to hang out with her more and get to be closer with he-
A burning sensation makes itself known in my pocket, and by association, my leg. "OWH! What is in my-" There is a vision, a pyro vision is in my hand. It's not as hot as before, but I'm very confused. "Hey, Hu Tao. Why did you put your vision in my pock-" Hu Tao's eyes are gleaming in surprise. I notice that her vision is still on her.
"IS THIS-?" I start jumping around in excitement, like a child going through a sugar high. Or like a guy on the Maury show when they're not the father of the child. Wow, I thought I was keeping those references subtle.
Hu Tao is still in awe, but with a more relaxed grin. "Wow, was it that easy? Hehe, I guess it was meant to be." I put the vision back in my pocket. I am pleasantly surprised at how quickly I was able to discover what a vision was, only to be able to acquire one just after. Either I have a convenience deus ex-machina, or I am being stalked by the gods. Hopefully the former.
"Wow, he just continues to amaze me! They're really... interesting. I wish I could keep him around all the time..." Is she... whispering to herself? I'm really intrigued by what she means. "What do you mean by interesting?"
Hu Tao panics in a surprising shock. "O-Oh! You know... you seem a little different from the other people I've met. Apart from not being from Teyvat, I-I'm not sure what it is about you, but you exude such a certain charm and confidence. Something about you just feels special to me. Does that make s-sense, or am I talking nonsense?"
That last part felt weird for her to say. She continues speaking. "W-well, what can I say? It's my job as a living, breathing, human being to say what's on my mind. And as a friend of yours, I feel it's my duty to show my appreciation to you... maybe I did overdo it a little... but still! You deserve to know how I view you!" She puts her hands up in a shrugging position. "I guess sometimes I'm just a little too honest with my feelings. Hehehe~, I hope you don't mind."
Gods, or Archons, she is too cute to exist, I thank whoever blessed me today. I am falling wayy too hard for this girl. I am borderline cosplaying as a tomato with how red I've become, the stuff she said is too sweet! I couldn't have been prepared for this confession, and I think that alone gave me the courage to do my own.
"I guess I should also be a little more honest in my feelings too... I think you are an amazing person to be around..." With my face red, I take a deep breath. "A-and I think I-I... uhh..."
Nice job, (name). You are a world-level stutterer. And a pro-league nervous wreck. And a competitive blusher. And a top level-
"You think you... what~? Come onnnn, I won't judge. Whatever it is, you can tell me! Just... take your time. You can say it whenever you feel ready~" After that part, she got extremely close to me. She whispered the last part next to my ear. "And even if you don't have the confidence to say it right now, I can wait until you do~"
Uh oh, boner alert. (rihanna reference)
"I think I... I l-li-" As if my blushing couldn't get any more obvious, she catches on with what I'm about to say.
"... I... like... you? Is this what you were trying to say?" She was practically beaming, smiling from ear to ear with a mischievous grin. "Did I get it right? Do youu~?"
I nod slowly, in defeat and in preparation of rejection. Who wouldn't try to get with someone this perfect?
"Y-yes..." I'm pressing my fingers together and looking away from her, embarrassed at how quickly she found out.
"Well then, what do you have to say?" She scolds me with a slight frown, and her hands on her hips.
"S-sorry..." I stand up and begin to walk away, but not before a laugh can be heard. "Y-you're... sorry? Why would you be sorry? You have no reason to be, and with that you answered a question that's been in my head all day! Thank you, thank you, thank you~!"
I am really confused here. She is thanking me? I repeat the thought into words. "W-why are you thanking me?"
"Well, I didn't think I'd ever be in a position to have a moment like this, but I've finally found someone who likes me for who I am... I was told that I'm too boy-ish and that I don't look that much like a woman, but I didn't really care... up until recently though. A lot of my friends are in relationships, and I have yet to find someone... but... you came into the picture." She continues with a faint blush on her cheeks. "After talking to you yesterday, I noticed that you took my teasing a little too seriously. And for some reason, that stuck with my head all night... and to get my mind off of it, I took a walk; only to see you again on the ground..." She says that part with a frown. "And when I got you more food for you to eat, I couldn't help but take the opportunity to talk and be around you. I found you really attractive..." She puts her hand on her chest, a sign of endearment. "It took me a little bit to realize... that I might like you as well..."
Archons, the look she's giving me is picturesque. She looks too adorable to not just hold in my arms. "Hu Tao..."
"W-well, aren't you just the nuisance in my head~! You've got me all flustered and sentimental about you! You will have to pay... in a hug." As she says that, she wraps her arms around me. I have no choice (it wasn't like I was gonna choose something different) but to return the hug. "Y-you're really good at h-hugs..."
I respond a little less nervously than before. "I'm usually not much of a hugger, but I think I just kinda... wanted to make sure I didn't forget this moment." She's practically snuggling into my chest. "H-hey... is this... the first time you've felt like this about someone?"
No words are spoken, but I feel her nod in my chest. Adorable. I think it's time to be a little more bold.
"I would like to go to the one place you mentioned earlier with you... is that okay? I think it would be a nice way to further the conversation into somewhere more intimate..." The thought poked itself into my head, I wanted to know what this place she liked was. "I think it's time I said a few more secrets about myself."
In all honesty I was not preparing to confess today, or to travel. Guess liking someone has a massive influence, huh?
yall are not ready for a second chapter, i might make it dirty or smth
