STAR WARS: KETAMINE QUEST
The Jedi Order has fallen
The GALACTIC EMPIRE has seized control of the galaxy.
Former Grand Master Yoda has retreated to the swamp world of Dagobah where he waits for the CHOSEN ONE to appear.
To pass the time, Yoda indulges his addiction to Corellian Ketamine however, he will soon be forced to start a new quest..
Yoda awoke in his little swamp hut. "Started, another bullshit day has." he grumbled to himself as he threw off his blanket "Why sleep on a wooden slab, do I?" he asked before heading over to his ketamine stash, ready to start the day off right, but...
"Fucking shit! Gone my Ketamine is! need my fix I do!" Yoda yelled as he threw the box to the side "Hmm! find my precious Ketamine I must!" Yoda went out and took a seat in his hummer, driving off into the swamp to track down his drugs. His first stop was the nearby Walmart. "Took my drugs, Jar Jar must have." Yoda said angrily as he crushed a Prius under his hummer. "Beat his flappy eared ass I will."
There he was, Jar Jar, hanging around the back of Walmart trying to get laid as usual, Yoda used the force to yeet the hooker away before pointing a finger at Jar Jar. "Took my Ketamine, have you? hmm?" he accused. Jar Jar raised his hands in panic "No Mister Bombad Yoda sir! meesa know better than to make yousa angry!" he said. "Hm.. believe you this time I do. Too much of a loser to do drugs you are, anyway." Yoda said before walking back to his hummer, that's when he caught the scent, he can smell his precious Ketamine! He walked as fast as he could toward the source of the smell.