Chapter 49

Save the Best for Last

Four months later…Olivia and Amanda stood by the harbor on a beautiful afternoon, surrounded by few friends and family as they exchanged their vows. There was a nice breeze, and the sun was just enough to cast a warm light. Amanda, technically, was still in recovery and was kept mostly on bed rest as a precaution, but now so close to her due date the blonde insisted they have their wedding ceremony, "before I pop," as she so bluntly put it. The trauma in their family ran deep and the women were far from recovery, but every day, little by little they healed a little more.

Noah stood proud as their ring boy and Jessie was the cutest flower girl they'd ever seen in her frilly white dress.

Olivia had agreed to a small family and friend's meal afterwards. "Nothing too crazy," she insisted. And the minute the officiate walked away she made Amanda sit.

"Liv, stop fussing. I'm ok. She's okay." She assured her wife as she rubbed her belly.

Olivia took a deep breath and looked around them.

"Hey." Amanda pulled her over as she looked deeply into her eyes, full of such love, "Everything is perfect."

The brunette eased up and smiled as Amanda drew her in for a loving kiss. Which was quickly broken up by the women giggling after they heard all the wine glasses being clinked by their guests' spoons. Their guests, if one could call them that was a small bunch. One that consisted of family and closest of friends. Save some new friends that had recently become important in their lives, like Katy and her wife, Clara. And a still recovering Leroy with his now glowing, newly pregnant wife.

Amanda was still as enthusiastic as ever about her meals. And even though she knew her helicopter of a wife wanted to wrap things up and get her back into bed, she would take her time and enjoy her cake! Not to mention, enjoy her wedding to the one and only Olivia Benson.

"So, Mrs. Benson-Rollins, how do you like the chocolate cake?" Liv teased.

"Oh I don't know? I think I need another tasting. Just to make sure it's good enough for our guests." Amanda laughed and frowned as she noticed Jessie's face full of chocolate.

Olivia reached over, "I got it. Like mother, like daughter." She was enjoying herself so much.

Barba came over, "I'd like to propose a toast. To Amanda and Olivia and their growing family. Two women, I have come to know and love and admire over the years. Two people that I consider my friends. May your love for each other only grow stronger; may your family and your lives thrive in health. May you always be safe and prosperous. Cheers!"

"Cheers!" Everyone cried out.

Fin, who was always close to Liv throughout the ceremony, leaned away from Phoebe towards Olivia, "And may your bed stay…"

"Odafin Tutuola!" Olivia reprimanded. "I am still your boss!"

Phoebe who was close enough to hear smacked his arm.

"I was gonna say comfortable and plush. Ya'll the ones with the problem."

"Yeah, yeah." Amanda only said through bites of cake.

Carisi was being incredible supportive despite having moments when he moped around after seeing Liv and Amanda together. "Are we gonna have a dance?"

"No, I don't think…" Liv started.

"It's a slow dance…"Amanda protested.

"There's nothing I want more but the Doctor said…"

"Yeah, yeah, I know, I know but ok…how about this? We start it off and then we'll sit? Everyone else can finish the dance and go on till their hearts content."

Liv was still unconvinced.

"Katy is here. She's ER. I am incredibly safe. Two minutes."

Like Liv could resist the puppy-eyed, baby blues boring a hole into her heart. "Okay, two minutes, Amanda."

As Liv helped her stand up Amanda began again, "Oh no. You can't Amanda me. Not today, Liv."

"Oh no?" Liv asked as they walked towards the dance area.

Amanda turned to Beth Anne, "Watch the kids a sec, please."

She smiled and nodded as she too stuffed her mouth with cake.

So Amanda continued, "Today you can only refer to me as wife, or Mrs. Benson-Rollins, or honey, sweetheart, baby…"

Liv gently spun her around, "Today or always?"

"Hmmm, I prefer always." Liv gave her a chaste kiss as they moved as close as they possibly could given the protruding baby belly in-between them, that was now doing summersaults after the sugar rush.

Amanda gave a nod to the DJ as an old song by Vanessa Williams came on, "Save the best for last."

Olivia laughed, "Wow. I haven't heard that in a minute."

Amanda glowed and not just because of the pregnancy, "I can't think of a more appropriate song."

"You planned that."

"Every couple needs a wedding song. And this one, I dedicate to you."

Olivia paid attention to the lyrics as she wore a silly grin and gazed into Amanda's eyes like a love sick puppy. Before she knew it the song was over.

"Rollins, you sneaky girl."

Amanda got on her tippy toes, as she was forced to wear flats and Olivia donned some heels; she kissed Liv's nose for good measure. "I love you, Liv. So much. Thank you for marrying me. And at the risk of sounding like a corny romance novel, thank you for makin' my dreams come true."

Liv couldn't comprehend how after all these months, Amanda still found ways to touch her so deeply with her words and actions, "I love you." She kissed Amanda and escorted her off the dance floor.

The night had been relatively short compared to other weddings because Liv was still in extreme over protective mode, but it was perfect in both their eyes. They had peace and boundless love, all the things in life these women deserved and had been deprived of before accepting their love for one another.

Before they knew it, 10 months time had passed and they now stood on an alter, at a church, baptizing their daughter, Billie. It had been Olivia's idea to give her this name. Although it had occurred to Amanda as well, but Liv voiced it aloud before she did. After all, Olivia believed that if not for the sign language Amanda had been taught and that she in turn taught to Noah, they likely would have never found her in time or at all. They stood with their friends and family taking pictures and Olivia found herself especially grateful on this very day; because for those hours of tremendous torture, she had believed this day may have never come.

There were flashbacks and nightmares for Amanda and moments of guilt and PTSD for Olivia. Therapy sessions were long and some days were more difficult than others but in time they allowed themselves to relish in the joyful moments without the heaviness of the past.

Amanda, had graciously taken a position at the FBI, three months after Billie was born. Even after her pregnancy leave, she was reluctant to walk away from SVU but she also understood that the PTSD for both she and Olivia would be better served if she took time away. Olivia offered for Amanda to stay home permanently, and for some time she did. But Amanda was too intelligent and too angsty to stay away from what she loved. So for now, she profiled for the FBI and also worked as a professor in forensics; a gig Carisi had found for her now that he was an assistant ADA. Olivia was extremely proud of her, although there were days she missed her incredibly at the office. Benson, herself considered walking away, but Amanda wouldn't have it. She told Liv she could never forgive herself if she were the reason that the Captain walked away from what she loved doing most.

Naturally, they were extra cautious in their day to day lives. They didn't trust many people but they kept a great friendship with Katy and her wife till this day. All in all, that monster tried to ruin her life and her family but he never succeeded for she, Amanda and their kids had built a beautiful life together and seldom did they give that monster a proper thought.

Olivia had learned to rarely allow any of the negativity from her past to seep in, and when it did she simply let it pass through; she never marinated in it the way she used to. And she was finally happy in her life. All these beautiful things she had imagined for other people, that she never believed she deserved were her reality. That sentiment of feeling undeserving and abandonment along with their other personal issues within of themselves, warranted most of the therapy that both she and Amanda continued to receive. Although now it was mostly once or twice a month, more of a check in. And the children had been discharged from therapy long before, although Olivia and Amanda still took them from time to time.

Jessie had, thankfully, forgotten all the events. Noah, on the other hand still had trust issues. But he had adjusted well. And he was still over the moon to be a big brother. He had even confessed to Olivia that he "didn't remember his life" before they were a family.

Both Amanda and Olivia were people that came into their relationship with deep scars from their pasts and the therapy, although initiated due to William's assault, was something that only made their relationship stronger. Something they would have benefited from either way but may never have complied to, at least not Amanda, had it not been for the trauma. And now, more than ever, after the horror they lived, the women held a deeper appreciation for each other and had learned to stop questioning themselves and their happiness, allowing their own insecurities to fade with their pain. It allowed them both to fully embrace themselves, each other, and their life together.

And although these incredibly brave and strong women had lived difficult lives and had more trauma than any one person ever deserved, with Noah, Jessie, Billie, Frannie and each other, Olivia and Amanda Benson-Rollins had finally found their happiness together and formed the beautiful life they had always dreamed of.

Hey there readers. Thank you so much for sticking with the story until the end, inspite of typos and some major delays in posting. Thank you for all your awesome reviews, follows, messages and likes! Your encouragement has lead me to writing my first book that I hope to get professionally published. Please follow me on instagram! You can find me as nightwritertales, E.M Fern.

This doesn't mean I don't plan on continuing my fanfic bc I still have too many stories swimming in my head!

Keep going because there is one final chapter to this tale as an epilogue.

I hope you enjoy the final words and thank you again for going on this crazy ride with Olivia, Amanda, the gang and me! You are all awesome!