GOOSE

A goose waddled up to U.A.. The gate slammed down, gun turrets sprang up, sirens blared, and a whole army of robots moved to bar the way.

"Code G," a robot announced. "Send reinforcements!"

The goose honked and walked forward. A deluge of bullets fired upon it, obscuring the goose in a shower of metal. The turrets and robots kept firing until the bullets clanged against concrete.

"Did we get it?" one droid asked. Its chest exploded and the goose hopped out of it.

"Honk," the goose said.

"Retreat!" The robots dropped their guns and ran. The gun turrets detached themselves from the wall and waddled away. The goose picked up a gun in its beak, walked up to the gate, and clipped through it.

U.A.'s teachers stood ready. Aizawa unfurled his capture scarf and said, "Easy there. This is no place for wildlife."

"Honk."

The capture scarf gingerly reached for it. The goose opened its beak, revealing serrated metal teeth that whirred noisily. The goose bit down. Aizawa yelped as he was pulled along by his scarf and disappeared into the beak. Moments later, the goose coughed up a pile of coffee grounds.

"Aizawa!" Present Mic shouted. "I'll avenge you!" He sent out a sonic shockwave that ripped apart the ground. The goose stood unfazed. Its honk broke the sound barrier and knocked Present Mic into the stratosphere.

Midnight said, "Gotcha!" and flung sleeping gas onto it. The goose sneezed. It bit into her costume, ripping it to shreds.

"No!" Midnight said, frantically trying to cover herself. "This story's rated T!"

A censorship team drove through a wall, wrapped Midnight in a towel, and hauled her off for mental rehabilitation.

Vlad King and Ectoplasm exchanged looks. "I'l get Bakugo," Vlad King said.

"And I'll get Nezu."

Cementoss sighed, suddenly alone. "I'm not paid enough for this."

"Honk."

With a tap of its beak, the goose shattered Cementoss into concrete dust.

Bakugo slammed into the goose from above. "Gotcha, you filthy robot. Eat nitroglycerin!"

Bakugo unleashed explosion after explosion onto the goose. Once he finished, he panted heavily and admired the giant crater beneath him.

"There. Gotcha."

"Honk."

Bakugo blanched. He turned around and saw the goose at the crater's rim, aiming a gun down at him.

The goose let out a rasping, honking maniacal laugh. The second before it fired, the laughing cut off, and it gave a confused "Honk?"

Its chest exploded. Nezu stepped out, dusted himself off, and said, "The birds really are robots."

"Told you!" Bakugo shouted.

"Hmm… looks like I'll have to call in some old friends."

Meanwhile, Power Loader ran out, pulling up his pants, and shouted, "I'm here! Where's the goose?"

He looked around and saw the pile of coffee grounds. "Sweet! Free coffee!"

He brewed himself a cup and took a sip. His pupils dilated to black saucers and his hands trembled so violently they shattered the mug with a resonant frequency.

"I think my heart just stopped."

499

Any guesses on who Nezu's going to call in to solve the robo-bird problem? No, I'm not asking because I need ideas, shut up. I already know who it'll be. You didn't see anything.