A/N — we had family visit over the weekend and five-year-old was being, well, five. At one point, fifteen-year-old nephew looked five-year-old in the eye and said "read the room, kid" and I laughed until I cried because the chances of that happening were literally zero. I can't stop imagining Mike using this line incessantly with the enlisted kids with similar results. xoxo — kals

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Chapter 7: I knew I loved you then, but you'd never know

Three Weeks Before Season 5

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Kara spotted Alisha walking through the door as she bent to unbutton Frankie's coat. Raising a hand so Alisha could see where they were, Kara shooed her son off. "Go play but stay where I can see you, okay?"

As Frankie took off, thrilled by the unexpected trip to the arcade, Kara slipped into the booth across from Alisha. "Did you order already?"

Alisha gave Kara a level look. "No. There's no way that I am eating anything from this place. There is a reason that I left the Nathan James at the same time as Bacon."

"Actually, the fried stuff isn't bad," Kara replied, flagging down the waiter and ordering a cheese pizza for Frankie, as well as an appetizer platter with breaded mushrooms, jalapeño poppers, onion rings, and mozzarella sticks for her and Alisha, and two glasses of chardonnay.

Alisha waited until their wine arrived to ask the obvious question. "So, why exactly did you drag me to one of your least favorite places in the universe on a Thursday night?"

Kara sighed. She didn't hate the arcade, just didn't enjoy it. This was something that Danny and Frankie did together on weekends when Kara had to work, joining them after for a slice of pizza and glass of wine while being regaled with stories of their high score on whatever game Frankie decided was his favorite that day.

Something that they used to do, Kara corrected herself.

Turning back to Alisha, she explained. "Danny texted earlier. Asked me to meet him here with Frankie so he could say goodbye."

"Think he'll show?" Alisha asked, voice skeptical. Kara didn't blame her. After three months of silence, followed by their blow-out last weekend, Kara had no idea what to expect from Danny. Heck, she still wasn't sure what she thought about last weekend. Yes, Danny was completely in the wrong for just disappearing on her, but did she really want him out of her life for good? Hence the panicky call to Alisha as soon as she saw Danny's text asking to see Frankie. She absolutely could not do this alone.

"I don't know," Kara replied. "I didn't tell Frankie that Danny was meeting us here, just in case."

She watched her son jump up and down in excitement when he managed to hit the highest level on the ball toss. "Mom! Mom, look!"

"Great job, Frankie." As Frankie ran off to climb onto one of the mechanical animal rides, Kara turned back to Alisha. "So what do I say when he gets here? Do I apologize?"

Alisha considered the question. "Are you sorry?"

"I'm..." Kara hesitated. Was she sorry? Sorry that their marriage was falling apart? Absolutely. Sorry that she threw her ring at him? Yes. Sorry that she lost her temper and yelled? Probably. Sorry about what she said? No. Having Danny disappear like that, and then reappear only to tell her that he wasn't coming home, had been worse than a punch to the gut. And Kara refused to be her mother, willing to tolerate unacceptable behavior in her desperation to have a man — any man — around. But none of that meant she handled the situation well. "I went too far."

"In other words, you're still mad," Alisha said, taking a tiny bit of a jalapeño popper. "These actually aren't terrible. Anyway, not that I blame you for being pissed off but Danny has the emotional intelligence of a cereal box. If you try to talk to him tonight before you calm down, you'll end up arguing again and do you really want to have a fight in the middle of a kid's arcade? Especially with Frankie here?"

Kara took a deep breath. Alisha was right, of course. She had sworn to herself that she would never make a scene in front of Frankie, having experienced too much of that growing up with Debbie. This was half the reason that Kara called Alisah versus showing up tonight alone, trusting Alisha to keep her from doing something monumentally stupid. Still... "Danny's going to Columbia. You know how unstable that region is. What if something happens?"

Alisha sighed. "You can't keep brushing your problems under the table because you're scared that Danny's going to die, Kara. You've been doing that too long or else the other night wouldn't have happened."

"You're probably right," Kara admitted. It was only after Danny pulled his disappearing act that Kara fully appreciated how absent Danny had been. For months, Kara had quietly been taking Danny's responsibilities off his plate. First it was enrolling Frankie in the preschool aftercare so that he wasn't home alone with Danny every afternoon. Then it was asking Debbie to stay at the house to meet the plumber or sign for packages. After a while, Kara began handling the grocery shopping and other errands during her lunch hours rather than asking Danny to take care of it. By the time Danny actually left, his absence resulted in very little practical change to her and Frankie's day-to-day life. In most of the ways that mattered, Danny was gone long before he physically left.

"Of course I'm right." Alisha rolled her eyes. "Frankly, we both know that, if Danny shows up tonight, it's only because of what you said the other night. Otherwise he would have left without seeing Frankie — again. Sometimes tough love is a necessary evil."

"I know." Kara ate an onion ring even though her stomach felt like a ball of lead. "So, stay professional?"

"Yup," Alisha replied. "Danny said that he was here to see Frankie, so let him see Frankie. When it's time to leave, you tell him to stay safe and call when he can to talk to Frankie. Calm, cool, collected. Don't engage."

"Calm, cool, collected," Kara repeated, setting down the onion ring and picking up her wine instead.

"Of course, that assumes Danny even talks to you," Alisha continued, eating another popper. She rolled her eyes. "More likely he'll act like you don't exist. That is his MO when he's confused. By which I mean he knows that he's totally in the wrong but unable to handle the situation like a functional adult."

"That's a little unfair..." Kara began, only to stop when she saw Alisha's face. She sighed. Unfortunately, Alisha wasn't wrong. The same thought occurred to her earlier, one of the reasons that she dragged Alisha here tonight. Because as nerve-wracking as the idea of seeing Danny was right now, the thought of Danny ignoring her while she sat here alone was somehow even worse. Yet she had seen him do it before, mentally detaching to a degree that was almost chilling. "I don't think I can deal with that."

Alisha's eyes flickered over Kara's shoulder. "Looks like we are about to find out. Danny just walked in."