Even the Pup is an Unmentionable

by Debra8652

An Unmentionable pup becomes the Rangeman mascot. I realize that some readers won't read a story that isn't marked as Complete - I understand that - no one likes cliffhangers. Due to the stand-alone nature of each of these chapters, I am marking it as Complete, but it is being added to semi-regularly. Click on Follow if you wish to be notified of future chapters.

26. Chapter 26

Disclaimer: All familiar characters belong to Janet Evanovich. I am not making any money from this. Mistakes are mine.

Spoilers for my FF Asking for a Friend, Chapter 10 - Frank's chapter

Even the Pup is an Unmentionable by Debra8652

Chapter 26

Remy's POV

As Dad Diesel says, "There's a disturbance in the force". Grandpa Frank Plum is worried that I will breed and pass on my Unmentionable abilities to my offspring. Mom is wondering if my special abilities would stop me from making puppies - duh, yes! Dad Diesel hasn't even had The Talk with me! Mom just says, "Don't be like Santos". As if.

I'm looking over Mom's shoulder while she's reading about sperm counts in dogs. Sheesh. Is Dr. Tammy going to do that to me? Is it like a date? Should I dig up one of Ella's fall mums to take to Dr. Tammy? I really need my Dad Diesel to let people know that I can't make pups bc I'm Unmentionable. Where would we find that many people to adopt us who would understand us? Until Dad pops in to let everyone know, we need to keep working on Mom's birthday party! Tick tock.

Starting right after Halloween, Rangeman is participating in the winter coat drive in Trenton. I guess winters aren't nice here and people, especially kids, need heavy winter coats, hats, scarves, and mittens. Since that's already been decided, Mom said that she wants any of her birthday donations to go to Shoes That Fit. Good choice. What if your feet hurt bc your shoes were too small? Or you didn't have shoes at all? Or you didn't have winter boots? I wonder how many Rangeman vehicles it will take to deliver our donations to the high school gym? Awesome - can't wait.

Have I mentioned that my mom says that "plan" is a four-letter word? Truth. My little cousin was scheduled to get tubes put in her ears today. Val and Albert would get Angie and Mary Alice off to school and then check in at the clinic with Lisa. Good plan. Except for the fact that there was an overnight water main break that closed the older girls' school. And Grandma Helen Plum was scheduled to work all morning at the church fall pancake breakfast and was already there. Aunt Stephanie and Lester Santos to the rescue. It's a beautiful fall day and they are taking Angie and MA to Six Flags Great Adventure amusement park. My mom will be the token adult as the girls are still kids and Santos is Santos. Mom's Man had Hector hack into the security cameras at the amusement park. Smart man. No good can come from having those two left unsupervised - Mom and Lester, not Angie and MA. I am sitting on a chair beside Hector in the breakroom to watch what happens at Six Flags. Some of the Rangeguys stop to watch, too.

All four of them were given balloon hats at the gate. They rode the merry-go-round first and then the teacups. Who knew Santos could fit in one of those. On to the bumper cars. Next was a stop for Sno Cones. The ladies all had red ones. Santos had a green one to "match his brilliantly green eyes". That turned out to be a very wise decision. It's time to ride the roller coaster, the Kingda Ka. Mom and Santos are in the front car with Angie and MA closer to the back. Mom had on a white shirt made of that gauze-like material. What happened next was a pretty typical Mom-Santos thing. Just as the roller coaster made its deep drop, Santos hurled onto Mom's shirt. And when he was leaning over to do that, his spiky hair punctured Mom's balloon hat. So, it's good that it was a green Sno Cone. People might have thought the popping balloon was a gunshot, especially if Mom's shirt had a red Sno Cone all over the front of it.

Mom has a few years of BEA experience and had wisely packed a clean shirt in her messenger bag. She disappeared into the restroom when the ride ended and came out wearing a different shirt and no balloon hat. It made the Rangeman guys watching the cameras panic until they figured out what happened. Santos was green - both his eyes and his complexion. She didn't yell at him, probably bc of Angie and MA being there. She did say she wouldn't ride anything with him if he had a chili dog for lunch.

On to the log ride - everyone survived that. And Mom got a text from her sister that they were home and Lisa did fine.

Mom lifted one eyebrow - she tried anyway - to ask Santos if he was ready for lunch. They decided on plain hotdogs and took the sky glider to that side of the park for lunch. Since they were done with eating and the rides, they headed for the arcade so Lester could try and win stuffed animals for the girls. He did good! Angie and MA picked out a pink teddy bear for Lisa. Santos won Angie a stuffed unicorn and MA got a stuffed horse - who saw that coming? Wait - do my eyes deceive me? Mom is handing Santos money and pointing out a stuffed elephant. She knows elephants are my favorite zoo animals. Santos declined her money, probably bc he saves a lot of money when I sabotage him getting dates with women. Oops. Happy dance time - Mom has a stuffed gray elephant under her arm. They are now headed for the parking lot. The return trip was uneventful except for when Santos' balloon hat hit the inside roof of the SUV and popped.

Off to the Kloughn house to drop off Angie and MA and to check on Lisa, who loved her new teddy bear. Back to Haywood with my new stuffed elephant!

A/N Your reviews are appreciated. I relied on the Internet for information about amusement parks near Trenton.