I'm not strong enough to stay awayI can't run from youI just run back to youLike a moth, I'm drawn into your flame…And it's killing me when you're awayAnd I wanna leave, and I wanna stayAnd I'm so confused, so hard to choose ~ Not Strong Enough by Apocalyptica, Brent Smith

Chapter 23:

Stiles:

Pulling into the parking lot the Monday after my suspension ended was too much like pulling in on the Monday, I got the suspension. While I sat in the jeep people watching, Scott and Isaac jumped out and ran straight to Lydia and Allison grabbing them up in hugs and kisses, and in Allison and Isaac's case something worthy of soft porn.


"We may have to stop kissing at school." I mumbled.

"What?" she jerked in my arms, her head snapping up. "Why?"

"Malia, we lose control almost every time we kiss."

"No, we don't." she snorted, shaking her head. I quirked a brow at her.

"Remember the bleachers? The storage closet? Coaches empty office? The stacks on the 2nd floor in the library at the-."

"Alright, so we may get a bit… distracted when we make out. But that doesn't mean we have to stop."

"The last time we got caught, which, by the way, was only Tuesday, and it was in those very stacks, I had my hand in your bra and yours were down my pants. If it had been the librarian instead of another kid, then we would be suspended."


I hadn't realized I had zoned out until Liam and Mason tapped on my window. Shaking my head to clear it I grabbed my bag and got out. I tried hard not to look at her as I joined the waiting group, but I couldn't stop my hand from twitching in her direction. It was a habit, to hold her hand. One that I missed.

I shoved my hand in my pocket to curb the urge even though I saw her hand twitch in my direction as well before she crossed her arms.

"So, anything interesting happen while I was out?" I asked of the two couples that were trying to be subtle, and failing miserably, at watching me and her.

"Not really. Classes as usual." Scott shrugged, wrapping his arm around Lydia as we all walked towards the doors.

"Coach may be pissed though. Mitchell was first string and your second string, and both of you are out of commission for a while." Isaac snickered carrying Allison on his back. I winced.

"Yeah, I already talked to coach, I'm out the rest of the season. This won't come off until at least spring break." I said waving my hand in the air.

"Well, you can still come to practice, it just means you'll be warming the bench the rest of the season." Scott said.

"So, the usual then." I nodded.

"Basically." Isaac answered. I flipped him off which made him laugh.

"I need to head to the counselors office. Part of my punishment was to talk to her about my 'anger issues.' So, I have to make an appointment. I'll catch up with you guys in class." I said, seeing Theo down at the other end of the hall heading in our direction.

They nodded and continued on their way. I stopped at the office to set my appointment. Went to my locker and took my time changing out my books for morning classes, not that it already didn't take a lot of time with only one hand usable. The warning bell rang, and I dawdled. who created that word anyway. Was it the same person that came up with those sticky lip glosses? Finally getting to class right before the late bell sounded.

I took my seat next to her and offered a half smile, hers was sad in return. Maybe this was a bad idea. Maybe I should have gotten here earlier and chosen a different seat far away from her.

"Alright class, pop quiz. Books away. Take a sheet and pass the rest back." Mrs. Rice instructed handing the first person in each row a stack of paper.

I heard Malia gasp and watched the panic cross her face.

"What's wrong?" I couldn't help but to check on her. She looked at me with that deer expression.

"With everything going on I haven't really been studying. I don't even know what chapter we are quizzing on." she hurriedly whispered.

"Okay, just relax, it's just one quiz. You can do this, just answer what you can. That's it."

"No talking, quiz begins now." Mrs. Rice announced. I looked at Malia. She took a deep breath and nodded before taking her quiz.

I did know the chapter we were on and what the quiz was on but unfortunately, I was focusing more on her than I was on it so I'm sure most of my answers were either only half right or completely screwed up. Out of my peripheral I noticed her leg shaking and her claws scratching against the desk. She was losing control. I glanced to the front and saw the teacher writing on the board with her back to us.

My hand covered Malia's and gave a squeeze.

"Breath Malia, just breath. It's okay." I whispered so only she could hear.

She turned her hand over and laced her fingers with mine, claws retracted. closing her eyes and relaxing instantly taking a couple of long deep breathes. My thumb rubbed circles over the back of her hand.

"Okay?" I asked when she opened her eyes.

"Yeah. Thanks."

I gave her hand one last squeeze before letting go.

"Mr. Stilinski, can I ask what you are doing?" Mrs. Rice called from the front of the room. Thinking quick I grabbed one of Malia's pencils off her desk.

"Just borrowing a pencil, mine broke." I said holding up the confiscated pencil and smiling. She narrowed her eyes before turning back to the board. Malia let out a soft giggle and I grinned before returning to my test.

The rest of the morning classes went by fast and easy and since I only had one class with her there were no more smiles, touches or looks shared. That only brought back thoughts of the fact that there really were no more of any of that because we weren't together anymore.

By the time lunch time came around I had resolved to stay as far away from her as possible. because it hurt to be close to her and not be with her. That didn't help when I grabbed a soda from the vending machine and started to make my way to our usual table only to see that the only seat available was right next to her. Scott caught my eye and his smile dimmed as he also noticed the seating arrangement. I shook my head before he could do or say anything and changed course, heading for the courtyard instead.

I was grateful it wasn't a really cold day as I sat on the tabletop. There were a few kids lounging around, a few taking advantage of the unsupervised area and groping each other under the shade of trees.


"So, what book are we looking for again? And why are we in the music section?" Malia asked as I pulled her by the hand up to the second floor of the library and all the way to the back left corner.

"You'll see." I told her, finding the spot and backing her up into a small section of brick wall between two bookshelves.

"Stiles, wha-."

I attacked her lips, gripping her hips and pressing against her. she moaned sliding her fingers into my hair. My hands slid under her shirt, sliding against soft skin as I kissed over her jaw and neck.

"Oh God." She gasped when I ground my hips against hers.

"I th-th-thought…we were supp-. Stiles." She groaned when my hands slid into her bra, thumbs flicking over her nipples.

"I know. but I couldn't help it, I had to kiss you, touch you." I whispered against her lips, sliding my tongue against hers.

"I need…" she whimpered.

"Touch me, Malia." I told her. attacking her lips again I felt her hands moved down my chest and under my shirt. She popped the button on my jeans and slid the sipper down. I groaned when her hand made contact with me, resting my head on her shoulder.

"Uh." A throat cleared near us, and we both started, looking behind me and seeing a freshman standing there awkwardly looking at us. Malia huffed a laugh and pulled her hand out of my pants as I took mine from under her shirt. She quickly fixed her bra while I carefully fastened my pants.

"Just checking for cavities." I told the girl, grabbing a snickering Malia's hand and tugging her way.

"Yeah, right." The girl snorted shaking her head at us as we passed.

"I know, I know. My fault." I chuckled when she opened her mouth to blame me.


I squirmed uncomfortably. Not the best place to reminisce about some things.

"Stiles."

I looked to see Theo jogging towards me. sighing I set my unopened can down. He approached holding up his hands in surrender.

"I come in peace; I swear." He said.

"What do you want?"

He studied me for a minute then took a seat next to me.

"I just want to talk that's all."

"About?"

"You, Malia, me."

"Yeah, that's the last thing I want to talk about, especially with you." I told him, moving to stand. He stopped me with a hand on my arm.

"Would you just listen?"

I stared at his hand until he moved it.

"Listen to what. I don't want to know what you and Malia have going on. I already want to hit you. but I can't afford two messed up hands."

"There's nothing going on between me and Malia."

"What?"

"You know I was hoping that either you or Scott would remember me by now. Kind of a hit to the ego that I was so forgettable. But then again it's been about 9 years since we all last seen each other." He chuckled.

I was confused about what he was talking about and how we got from him saying there was nothing between him and Malia to me knowing him. I searched my brain for any Theo's in my past. I could only think of one but…

"Your last name's Raeken?"

"So, you do remember. Good."

"Theo Raeken from Beacon Hill Elementary." I snorted.

"Yup, and if you remember that then you should remember who I first kissed on the playground during recess." He grinned, quirking an eyebrow at me.

I laughed as I remembered. Back in elementary school the boys would play this silly little game of running up and kissing a little girl on the cheek and running away. It was stupid and probably considered sexual harassment in this day and age. But back then it was just little boys being stupid. The day Theo was talking about was one when I was looking for Lydia so I could kiss her cheek while Scott stayed out of it all together. Suddenly this curly-haired boy came running up to us, kissed Scott on the cheek and ran away. Scott looked shocked but just smiled and shrugged.

"Scott." I smirked.

"Yup, he was my first crush ever."

"So, you're bi?"

"No, I'm gay. I have no interest in girl parts at all." He said, shaking his head.

"You don't know what you're missing." I muttered shaking my head. He laughed.

"I'm sure." he snorted.

"So, the hugging and touching?"

"I'm a touchy-feely guy. I usually don't think about it. but after Isaac explained how it looked to you. I didn't want there to be any misunderstanding."

"Wait, Isaac explained it to you?"

"Yeah, he did. He broke down how that hug looked from the outside. Especially since you all didn't know me or what I was really up to. I'm sorry if I came across as trying to steal your girl."

"she's not my girl. Not anymore." I sighed.

"that's another thing. I think your being stupid."

"You wouldn't be the first person to tell me that, but why?"

"Malia is so into you it's ridiculous. She sees no one else but you. and you literally beat a guy in the hall in school because you were so jealous of a hug."
"It wasn't just the hug." I told him.

"Yeah, I know, but that was the last straw for you. What I'm saying is that neither of you are apart because you don't care or don't want to be together. She regrets what she did, she thought she was doing the right thing, the only thing. I regret even putting that idea in her head. Are you really going to let this situation be what keeps you apart?"

"Now you sound like my dad."

"I am not sure how to take that."

"In the spirit in which it was given." I told him smiling.

"And that would be…"

"I get what you're saying. I get what everyone is saying. This is just something I have to work through." I said.

"Just think about it. I really do hope you two work through this."

I nodded then looked at him.

"Have you talked to Mason?" I asked randomly. He rolled his eyes.

"What is with everyone trying to set me up with Mason."

"Who else?"

"Isaac." He huffed.

"Ah, and I bet he did it with his usual amount of finesse."

"Of course." He snorted. "Mason is cute, sweet, and smart but he's not my type. Liam on the other hand…"

"Liam? You mean our mini wolf?"

"Mini wolf?"

"Yeah, it's kind of what we call him, he's too adorable even in wolf form to be anything but."

"I am so calling him that." He laughed.

"You and Liam talk?" I asked with a raised brow. He blushed and looked away.

"Yeah, sometimes. We call and text. But we're just friends. I don't think he's gay."

Recalling the touches between them at the last meeting I wasn't so sure he wasn't something.

"Well, if you ever find out and it works out in your favor, just make sure you treat him right. he's like a little brother to all of us."

"I won't hurt him." He said solemnly.

"Speaking of brothers, we should talk. I remember Corey, he idolized you in school. I want to help you find him."

Theo's eyes clouded as he nodded.

"I have to find him. He's all that I have left."

"What happened to your parents?"

"My dad is the one that turned me into… whatever I am. He's working for Kate now. My mom died right before we left Beacon Hills."

"Your dad did this to you? Why? How?"

"it's a really long story."

"Okay, we definitely need to talk. When was the last time you had contact with Corey?"

"He snuck a call to me just a couple of days ago. He has his phone on silent so no one can hear it, but I had been leaving messages for him ever since the warehouse when I heard Corinne say that… he was already dead. I had to make sure. He was okay though. They keep him locked up. My dad is still doing experiments to see… I don't know what."

"Write down everything you remember about where you were kept. I know you said you were drugged but if you can even vaguely remember hearing, seeing, or smelling anything when you were taken write that down as well, okay."

"Okay, what do you plan on doing?"

"Not sure yet. But I'll think of something."

"Thank you." he said gratefully. I clapped him on the shoulder.

"Maybe I don't want to staple your hands to your head after all." I beamed at him making him laugh.

"Hey."

We both looked to see Scott and Lydia walking towards us holding hands.

"Just checking on you." Scott said, looking at me.

"I'm fine. Just having a bonding moment with Theo. We were talking about how much I don't want to staple his hands to his face."

Theo rolled his eyes.

"You don't?"

"We cleared the air on some things. Oh, and this is funny." I grinned.

"Remember in third grade that game we use to play, kissing girls on the playground?"

"Yeah, how could I forget. It took you weeks to work up the courage to kiss Lydia and then you ran up to her stopped turned and ran back."

"I remember that. This scrawny kid ran up to me when my back was turned and as soon as I looked at him, he squeaked and ran away." Lydia said smiling.

"Alright, let's not rehash that." I said as Theo laughed. "Anyway, remember that little boy that ran up to you and kissed you on the cheek and ran away?"

Scott nodded and I tilted my head toward Theo, who gave him a wave. Scott blinked and I could see when it registered.

"Theo Raeken. I knew that name sounded familiar I just couldn't place it. you were in second grade when we were in third."

"that's right, you're a year younger than us. How did you end up in Malia's class?" I asked.

"It's just that one class and not my doing. Kate's and Corinne's plan needed me to be close to where she was. I'm good at science so..." He shrugged.

"Wait, where are you staying? If your brother and dad are with Kate?"

"They rented this little hole in the wall place for me to campout in during all this. But lately I've been crashing at Derek's place, ever since the fight. His idea."

"Good, at least you're somewhere safe."

The bell rang then signaling the end of lunch.

"Let's go to class and on the way, I'll tell you about the time Scott and Isaac decided to cuddle." I told Theo as we walked back to the school. Scott groaned and Lydia laughed as I told the story of Liam's change.