They stilled amongst the growing shadows of the undergrowth and jutting rock near the entrance to the cave, the gloom hiding them from any prying eyes for the moment.
"Where do we go from here?" Duncan asked, steadying himself on his good leg.
"We don't." Nathaniel's answer was simple as he carelessly gestured to the cave opening.
"I don't understand."
"This is it, as far as we can go. We hide in there. If we're lucky, they'll be figuring we can't have come this way and must've beached our canoes and headed cross land. If we're very lucky, they'll figure we went over the falls."
Duncan looked perplexed, "Then what?"
"Then we take the south rim down the mountain and it's twelve miles cross country to Fort Edward."
"And if we're unlucky?" Duncan sounded like he didn't like this plan at all.
"You'll have to forgo the pleasure of hanging me." Nathaniel's words were humorous but his face remained stern.
Erin glanced around at the bedraggled group of people, all wet, tired and cold. Alice looked like she had become impassive to all around her, she stared out across the expanse of falling water nearby, eyes unseeing, and Erin felt the weight of it. That expression was the merit of true inner turmoil, whether the result would be acceptance or ruin, was yet to be seen.
As Duncan and Nathaniel argued in hushed tones for a moment, Erin slowly came to realize she had seen a similar look before, in her own time. Ada's older brother, Josh, the name and face rang like a bell in her mind, and her heart ached with a simultaneous pain of memory and wistful nostalgia.
When she and Ada had been young girls, Josh had been their hero. He was a good few years older than his sibling but he always had time to play games and indulge her and her friends childish whims; whether that meant making him pretend to be a fairground ride and spin them in the air until they fell over dizzy, or coming to rescue them from imagined monsters. Erin thought he loved playing that part, the hero, and maybe that's why he'd entered the army straight out of high school, it seemed to be the only path he'd ever wanted.
For those first few years he'd seemed so happy, his letters home bursting with excitement and adventure, and when he visited he was full of fun anecdotes of where he'd been and what he had seen. Army life was everything he'd ever dreamed, until it wasn't.
When Ada had told Erin he was coming home because something bad had happened, part of her feared he'd come back missing an eye or some fingers, but he'd returned intact, at least physically.
Then came the letter of medical discharge.
Ada and Erin knew he'd seen combat, but he'd never made it seem like a big deal.
'A lot of boring waiting,' is what he'd called it.
When Erin had seen him again, he hadn't been the carefree boy she remembered, in his place was a man struggling with his own trauma and rampant PTSD. Ada said he refused to tell anyone what had happened to him, what he'd seen to change him so much.. In those first few days of coming home, he'd worn a similar expression Erin now saw upon Alice's face, lost and confused, trying to process all that had been experienced.
Alice had just witnessed barbarity all about her, desperate struggles of survival, men, women and children all cut or shot down as she watched and her father's fate still hung in the balance. She'd seen him attacked and dragged away, no matter what Cora had told her. The fact was plain upon her pallid emotionless face, all innocence had been lost today. There was no more pretending that this terrible world would fall away, leaving Alice Munro, English lady, back in her rightful place of safety and familiarity. She could never go back to the girl she had once been.
Thankfully Josh had got the help he needed to move past what had happened to him, and he found his own way to acceptance through therapy, friendship and the support of a loving family that understood his needs and his trauma. Erin didn't think Alice would be given the same opportunities in this time.
"Come." Nathaniel's voice came, shaking her back into the moment. He began to guide them into the rock fissure and the cave beyond.
Duncan went to Alice, taking her gently by the arm, steering her down the pathway. As the rest of the party disappeared Erin lingered, she wanted to talk to Uncas alone. He was the only person she could talk to, the only one that could understand what she had to say, and in this moment she needed a friend's understanding comfort. She reached out, her hand finding Uncas' arm, stilling him a moment. Under her touch she could feel a knot of muscle, his body still in fight or flight mode, his eyes scanning, rescanning and then finally coming to her face in response.
His gaze lingered a short moment, then his hand came gently to press against her cheek, the contact reminding Erin with a sharp jolt of pain that she had been injured there. She hissed lowly at the sting. He wiped a little at the red streaks with his thumb, his hand moving her chin upwards so he could gain a better look, eyes searching to understand how badly she was hurt.
He reached into a pouch at his belt, deciding it was nothing too serious, and pulled out a small scrap of clean cloth and walked a few steps to the rocky edge of the river. He quickly dipped it into the cool water and returned, his hand guiding her face again as he dabbed and cleaned her cheek with a gentle firmness.
Once he was finished his dark eyes met hers, a silent question of her well-being swimming through their depths.
"I'm okay." Her voice was so small and pitiful that tears welled within her eyes at the sound, she didn't feel okay.
As another tear slipped down her cheek unbidden, Erin inwardly mused how much she had cried in this last week and wondered a little at all the emotional turmoil this short time had brought into her life. She felt as though she could move from sobbing agony to stoic determination as quickly as the situation changed. It was like being on the worst roller coaster in the entire world.
Uncas thumbed away the wetness on her cheek and Erin didn't flinch away from the intimate contact, she longed for it, to be consoled. He pulled her softly to him, his arms enclosing her in a protective shield from all the harshness of the world. She clutched at his back and wept bitterly for all the fear and desperation she had felt that day and all the death she had seen.
"Did you see Munro?" His lips mumbled against her temple when she had quieted a little.
Erin gave a hollow laugh, nervous and unsure if she had done anything right. "I made the French guard knock him out and take him away."
She made to move away, trying to gain back her own senses and her knowledge that this was indeed far too familiar but he stilled her, holding her in place. It was easy to allow it, easy to lean on him and perhaps he knew she needed that firmness in this moment. Erin felt she could fall apart with the briefest of winds and his arms were the only thing keeping her standing. He held her closer, his scent of earth and smoke and fresh water were a lullaby she hadn't known she needed. It calmed her and made her want to try and be more resilient.
'Don't fall apart. Be stronger! Get hold of yourself!' Her mind chided.
"I saw them go towards the path that would take him to safety, to Fort Edward, if he got a good enough head start." Her voice was even now, no note of anxiety.
"Then you changed things."
She stayed wrapped in his arms for a long silent moment, allowing her brain to process all the events, the closeness of him making the weight of everything seem somehow lighter.
She finally twitched her head in a small shake. "I don't know, maybe, if he got away."
Slowly he pulled back, parting them and Erin felt the loss. "Come." His hand slipped easily around her wrist. "We can't stay out here, if anyone comes, we'll be seen."
He lead her down into the thin rock fracture, the way sometimes dry and often times slick and slippery, every step had to be taken with some caution. They descended for what felt a long time, until Erin guessed they must have been somewhere half way down the falls.
The cave below opened out into a large chamber, it was dark and cool. Water rushed by in a constant cascade, almost deafening in the echoing space. Erin knew they were behind the vast waterfall now. They finally came to where everyone had gathered, in a smaller side cave which dulled some of the noise. They all looked exhausted.
Nathaniel and Cora were talking a little way off to the side, in a deep private conversation. Duncan was doing his best to tend to Alice, although he seemed to be near his wits end as she remained unresponsive to anything he said or did. Alice didn't even really seem to know he was there at all. The two English soldiers were huddled together, one seeing to the other's wound.
"My son," Chingachgook was veiled a little in the shadows, "keep watch." His eyes moved to the path they had just entered from and then to Uncas' hand upon Erin's wrist. A flicker of an emotion Erin couldn't quite read fell across Chingachgook's face. The water played on the light and shadow around them making details hard to see but she could clearly tell it was not a pleased look.
Uncas gave a certain nod and tugged at Erin's arm, telling her silently to go with him.
She paused, resisting his request and turned to him. "I'll follow. We still must talk," she said, close enough that only he could hear. He nodded and let go, his long legs making the way they had just come look as easy as a flat path instead of the steep incline it was.
Erin knew she had a task that couldn't wait. She went to where Alice and Duncan sat, he looked up at her with a bewildered expression, his senses trying to process the carnage this day had brought and the circumstances he now found himself in. War and order he could understand, but what had happened today left him disoriented and unsure.
"Are you alright?" Erin motioned towards his leg.
He grimaced as he tried to move the limb, as if proving a point, but finally nodded. "Yes, I think so. Just a graze."
Erin nodded in mimic of his dismissive attitude, eyes narrowing, understanding his nature was never to make a fuss, to always be the protector. "You should ask Cora to look at it," she said bluntly, clearly stating she knew it was not 'just a graze'.
"Later," he sniffed, rejecting her concern.
"You will need your leg tended and bound if we have to move quickly." Her brow rose, stating she clearly didn't believe he would seek help without pressure, and she was going to be his bane if he didn't listen.
He sighed, relenting. "I will ask."
Erin smiled, then stilled in hesitation, unsure how to broach what she wanted to say, so she spoke without much of a plan. "Please... stay by Alice, don't let her wander off alone. She isn't herself." She gestured to the young girl who sat huddled, knees to her chest, like a child trying to block out the world around her. Duncan's jaw muscle twitched in distress, understanding Erin's meaning only too well, Alice Munro was indeed not herself. "It's dangerous in here, we are still a long way up. If she wanders in this state she may be hurt or... Promise me?"
It wasn't clear in the novel what state of mind Alice Munro had been in at this point. The author had a rather nasty habit of leaning in to the romance of the situation rather than the true feelings of the people he wrote about, so knowing exactly what was going around this young Georgian woman's brain felt almost impossible.
Erin could only guess the mental trauma this day had wrought. She felt it too if she allowed herself to linger on the memories, the flashbacks like waking nightmares of rending flesh and dying men's screams. Horrors upon horrors of what humans could do to each other. Erin tried to console herself that she had seen such things in movies or read about worse in books. It wasn't the same as seeing real violence, nothing could ever equal what she had seen today, but it had prepared her somehow, the knowing of what would come. Alice had never even had to imagine this kind of brutal misery and sorrow before.
What was more, Erin knew she could leave this place, everything about it, far behind when she went home. It perhaps wasn't the healthiest mindset, but she could pretend it was a bad dream if she had to, or better yet, get therapy, knowing she never had to see another Redcoat or 18th Century battle ever again. Alice didn't have that luxury, her situation and location may change, but her time would not.
Now all Erin felt she could do was try and soften Alice's way.
The book described Alice wandering away from the others, undetected, moving further up towards the second smaller cave where Uncas now sat watch. It was never explained why, what her reasons were. She'd been drawn to the water perhaps? Rushing, glinting, diamond droplets of beauty in a horrific world, and had stepped towards it, to see it, and the vastly stunning starlit sky beyond; or perhaps to go through the water to what could be, for her, a different time, a way to escape the damage and emerge into a world with no pain, no fear. Seeking beauty, or death, she had almost stepped into that water. Uncas stopped her getting too close to whatever her goal had been, mindless distraction or wilful determination, no one knew.
Erin didn't want to take any chances.
"I promise it," Duncan said, not really understanding why Erin seemed so resolute on the matter, but understanding Alice needed the extra care.
"Thank you." Erin turned her eyes to Alice and knelt before her, reaching out to clasp the young girl's cold, clammy hands in her own. "Alice? Are you alright?"
It took a moment for Alice to respond, as if her mind worked slowly, the words taking longer to register in her hearing. Her eyes moved with a leaden pace to finally rest upon Erin's form. They still held that flat grey tinge to them and Erin felt her heart pull at the sight and the loss it signified.
Erin tried to smile but the girl before her remained expressionless, as if she could not fully understand what she was seeing right in front of her, and then... something changed. It was subtle, like the shift in direction a strong breeze suddenly takes, catching you off guard. A slight twitch of the mouth, a hardness to the slate grey in her hazel eyes, and without warning, she sprang to her feet and flew forward, her body crashing into Erin's, forcing them both to fall with a heavy thump upon the floor. Erin froze in the wake of numb disbelief, not understanding what was happening or why.
Alice flailed sharp, harsh slaps down upon Erin's prone face and body, some fists came pounding upon Erin's chest. There was not a lot of strength behind the assault, but it was enough to wind Erin for a moment as shouts and frantic movement scattered around them. Erin tried to cover herself with her arms in defence, unwilling to fight back, unknowing if she even could. Alice's form was jerked backwards and Duncan hauled her away, restraining her as Erin sat up, shocked and dishevelled, her mind a jumble as she tried to understand what had just happened.
Others in the cave were just becoming aware of the disturbance and were coming forward, looks of confusion and question upon their faces. Erin pushed herself tiredly up onto her feet and then the strained cries came to prick at her hearing over the din of rushing water, cries coming from Alice, who was prevented from doing more than flutter like a trapped butterfly in Duncan's firm grip.
"Traitor!" The word sent a jarring sensation through Erin's nerves. "You betrayed my father to the French! How could you?!" Alice surprisingly didn't look angry, she looked exhausted as if this was her very last bit of energy. "I thought you were my friend but you were using me to get close to my father! To kill him!"
"I'm sorry..." Erin eyes were wide, her skin feeling as cold and clammy as Alice's had felt in her hands only moments ago. She stepped forward but saw Alice flinch away and so she stilled, her palms coming up in a gesture of peace. "I'm sorry I couldn't tell you the truth. I'm not working for the French and I believe your father is alive and well."
"Liar!"
"I swear it is the truth." Erin was having to shout over the roar of water, this was not the best place to have a frantic heart to heart debate about the logistics of what had happened.
"Liar..." Alice's lips formed the word, but it was said too quietly to make any sound. Then the young girl's body suddenly slumped to the ground, Duncan was completely caught off guard and scrambled to stop Alice hurting herself.
For a moment Erin thought Alice had fainted, just as was so often described in fictional stories as a dramatic plot device. But Alice had not swooned, instead she sat like a crumpled doll, her eyes unseeing, her expression welling with tears that refused to be shed, gathering in her eyes like vast pools of physical sorrow.
Cora suddenly dashed past Erin and then she stilled at the sight of her sibling's clear desperation, the young woman had no more to give, she was exhausted in body and mind. "Alice."
Alice's gaze was again so heavy, that it seemed to take her a long time to find her sister's face, a look rippled through her features that spoke of faint hope, hope that Cora could set all this to rights.
"I'm sorry Alice." Cora came to her sister, pulling her gently out of Duncan's grip and into her arms, enclosing her in an embrace, "I should have told you everything, but I thought it would be easier-"
"To leave me in the dark as you always do?" Alice's tears spilled over onto porcelain white cheeks, but her eyes remained flat, the tears silent and without the emotion that should have accompanied them.
"Erin did not betray father to the French dear one, she saved father. I believe he is still alive and well on his way to Fort Edward."
Alice shook her head weakly, her mouth moving in wordless distressed rebuttal to all her sister said.
Erin watched on, wide eyed and breathing hard, wishing with every part of her own being that Cora's words were indeed the truth and that Alice would hear them and be healed.
"What on earth is going on?" Duncan stood nearby looking completely perplexed by the situation. Cora shot him a stern look and he relented with a sharp sigh of defeat.
"All will be well dear one, all will be well." Cora rocked her younger sister with a great and sweet gentleness that spoke of many soothings through childhood adversity and loss.
Alice didn't react, instead her eyes focused upon the rushing water that shimmered with sunlight.
"We had planned to spirit father away quickly from the battle, but he refused to leave. I believe this is why Erin instructed those men to take father by force."
Erin gave a firm nod in agreement to Cora's words, but knew Alice had not seen it, she did not appear to see anything at all in this moment, just the glistening endless cascade.
"She's in shock," Cora said, glancing towards Duncan, her face pale and anxious. "If only I had some sweet tea, it would help."
Erin's hand instinctively went to her pocket, the bag of sweets were still nestled within, and she reached in, pulling out a red candy and holding it out like an offering that was a cure for all of life's current ills. "Here," she called over the constant rumble.
Duncan stood and took it with a look of unsure distaste. "What is it?" He turned the glistening candy over in his palm.
"Sugar," Erin said with a confidence she no longer felt.
Cora held out her hand and Duncan passed it to her, she took a small bite, chewed thoughtfully and then all attention was on Alice and trying to get her to eat, as Cora whispered words of love and encouragement into her sister's ear.
Erin turned away, unable to bear the sight. Yes, in the book Alice seemed to lose herself in the cave, it was understandable after all the horrors she had witnessed, but it wasn't like this! Had Erin been the cause of this? Was this all her fault? She bit her bottom lip fretfully, pushing back the bile that clawed up her throat and glanced up, feeling a cool steady gaze upon her. For a brief moment she thought she would see Uncas returning, but her eyes met the calm resolve of Chingachgook instead.
He was studying her with a canny, penetrating air, similar to his son's but without the tinge of anxiety Uncas often seemed to have when something concerned him. Age and a life well lived were a wealth of teachers that his son had yet to experience.
Erin understood, he knew she was the catalyst, the culprit, and the answer to a question yet unasked. She was the ruin and rescue of all that was to come. He held her watery gaze to him, seeming to reprimand and marvel at her within the same complex gleam inside his deep dark eyes. Erin wanted to flee, to run away and never come back into this damn cave, why was she even here?
'Why?!' The word echoed within her, leaving her feeling hollow and spent. What good had she ever done for these people? Self pity washed over her in slow queasy waves, leaving her feeling cold and repulsed by her own existence. If she hadn't meddled, Alice would not think her father was dead, she would not feel betrayed by a friend, she would not have lost all hope!
Erin wanted to run.
Then Chingachgook turned away, breaking the connection, looking towards Nathaniel who had come to speak in quick whispers to his father. Now his eyes were no longer upon her, Erin doubted she had seen any more than clear dislike in his gaze and felt shame burning through her body like a steady pulse as she understood her reactions were selfish. No matter what the unwanted outcomes where to actions passed, she had only one goal that counted, to keep Alice and Uncas alive.
/
A/N
Hello all. Happy Friday
I know FF has had a big surge on their systems a few weeks back which has knocked off all stats for stories, so the last few chapters I have no idea of readership other than people who left reviews. So I'm hoping I've not had a massive drop off in readers in that time as all my stats are reading a big 0 for all stories including Spark. Quite the drop from what it had been and makes me a tad paranoid. Oh well.
Thank you to everyone that did review, it was very much needed this week :)
So, welcome again to Erin's pity party everyone :)))
How are you all finding it so far?
If only she'd stuck with her own judgement and told Alice, things may have been different or maybe it really would have made things worse?
I wrote this scene quite differently to the movie as many of you will have noticed. No dreamy Alice captivated by the water. My reasoning for this change is that Alice didn't know her father was dead in that scene. Cora actively asks for her not to be told when she hears the news from Nathaniel. In Spark not only does Alice believe her father to be dead, but that Erin orchestrated it and used her friendship to do so. This is why Alice seems more emotional, because she hasn't just seen horrors today, she is in deep grief for her father and her trust being broken. I hope my writing brought that through.
I thought those motivations may make her react more strongly to what's happened rather than just retreating inwardly, although the shock did claim her in the end and she has become a little catatonic just as the script describes. But just as Erin thought earlier, will she be able to accept what has happened once she understands the truth or will it drive her even deeper in to herself? I guess we will have to see.
I also changed for my own devices, why Alice may have wandered up to the waterfall and Uncas in the original. Well I did and I didn't. Let me explain. In the script it is stated that Alice is wandering quite aimlessly back towards the entrance of the cave to the island beyond, drawn by the sky and starlight, which would give away their location very easily. In the movie, I think her intentions are very vague as she does not walk toward the entrance, but directly to a waterfall where she thinks she is alone. Seeming to be mesmerized by it, she watches it then walks forwards, and then Uncas pulls her back.
When I first watched this movie I felt convinced she was going to fall into it or be in some danger, either on purpose or because she was so taken with the waters beauty. I know this detail has been talked about endlessly and opinions go from, she just wanted to touch it/see it, to she was actively going to jump. Again, I fall in the middle of these opinions, I don't think we have enough to be able to tell what Alice was thinking other than, she was not really thinking very clearly.
I made Spark fall into that middle ground.
I very much hope any readers coming by are finding something to enjoy. I am taking a break next week, I will be away from home for a full week, so no time to tidy up the next chapter. I will be back on the 20th with a new chapter where Erin and Uncas will have to have that discussion Erin avoided at the fort. See you then :)
