Chapter 22: What Do I Deserve?

Fuyumi's car rolled up to the front of their house.

"Here we are!" she said cheerfully as she turned off the engine. "Wow, it's been a while since you were back here."

Shoto didn't reply. He stared blankly out the windows at the place he had grown up in. It had been over two years since he laid eyes on it. He hadn't missed it.

Fuyumi sighed deeply, her hands still resting on the steering wheel. "Shoto, it's ok, you know? Whatever happened at UA; whatever happened before, it doesn't matter. I'm going to be here nearly all week! I've talked with the school – not UA, my school - and they've let me take a few days off; I only need to go in twice, ok? And Dad's probably not going to be around much because he's really busy with this Stain case at the moment. We can watch movies; we can eat popcorn – and soba? You still like soba? That used to be your favourite, right?! Oh! And Natsuo is coming down to see us in a couple of days! Isn't that great?!"

"Yeah," Shoto said in a monotone voice, he pulled off his seatbelt and pushed open the door, leaving the metal cold behind him, "Great."

Fuyumi hesitated for a moment before getting out behind him, "Is there something wrong with missing our little brother?" she said teasingly.

Shoto ignored her, turning to grab his luggage out the back of the car.

His sister sighed and gave up on the conversation too. She grabbed the last bag that Shoto didn't pick up fast enough and locked the car behind them as Shoto marched on ahead. He planned on going straight to his old room to find his long-forgotten laptop. He didn't know what he was going to do with it just yet – but it was at least something.

Oh, and he had his brick phone still. Mr Aizawa had said they could message him if something were amiss, and he would immediately alert the heroes in their area. More importantly, however, was the fact that Midoriya's secret group chats were still set up, from when he hacked into the phones or something and reset them. Shoto still wasn't sure how that worked, but regardless, it meant he could send private messages to the others, or at least read about what they were getting up to. People like Mina or Kaminari were bound to be active there.

Fuyumi called after him a couple of times, but Shoto walked right past her, leaving his last bag in her grip. He wandered through the halls of this too-big house. He must admit, he got lost. When he was last here, the section of the house he now found himself in had looked entirely different. Whether it had been renovated, expanded, or burnt down and rebuilt, Shoto had no idea, and honestly, he didn't care.

Regardless, after a few more minutes than necessary, Shoto opened the door to his old bedroom. The bag that Fuyumi had taken was now waiting for him on his bed; she must have beaten him there and had enough sense to leave him in peace.

He stared at the sight before him for a moment – something taken right out of the past. With a sigh, he ran his hand through his hair and dropped the rest of his luggage; there wasn't much. It took a while to find his old laptop, and even longer to turn it on. Bright screen glaring in his face after far too many technical issues, Shoto's hands hovered above the keyboard; eventually, he found himself typing in his own name – but the sight of Son of the Number Two Hero this, Endeavor that, immediately put him off. He hadn't bothered with the media concerning him in the past, he wouldn't start now.

But with little else to do, he ended up searching for the class as a whole:

The REAL Story Behind Class 1-A's Quirkless President

The Villainous Son of the Number Two Hero Wins UA's Sports Festival for Class 1-A

Class 1-A's Plot to Flee UA!

Villains, Vigilantes and Heroes, The Grey Area That Class 1-A Represents

Zero, the Biggest Threat of Class 1-A?

The Class 1-A Fact Files

Who is Izuku Midoriya and How Did He Get into Class 1-A?

What UA DOESN'T Want You to Know About the New Class 1-A

Izuku Midoriya, the Bullied Victim of Fellow Class 1-A Member Katsuki Bakugo…

It was easy too forget, when locked up in UA's bubble, that the outside world was still watching. It was too difficult to keep incidences confidential with the rest of the student body onlooking and letters being sent out to parents and guardians. So, they released public statements on major incidences, which hardly ever occurred… until this class came around. Shoto found himself taken aback by the articles on their escape plot.

He thought about all the times the other students stared at him and his friends in the hallway. They weren't just from rumours around the school – they were reading these articles, making their own judgements. Shoto supposed… he was so used to the world being against him, that when he found himself in UA, where there were people who really understood, he forgot all about the war he'd waged on the outside. Being back at the place he once called home put it all in a daunting perspective.

He didn't leave that room all day. He pretended to be asleep when Fuyumi slid the door aside and carefully left a bowl of cold soba on the floor for him. It would be an hour or so until Shoto could finally bring himself to eating it. The following day held very few differences. Fuyumi appeared periodically to silently check on him and rest a bowl of food on his table. She tried to start a conversation once or twice, but Shoto just didn't feel like participating. It was the day after when his new, dull routine was finally broken.

"Well, if it isn't Shoto, huh?!" Natsuo grinned, resting an arm across Shoto's shoulders, "Long time no see!"

Shoto pushed his arm away and shoved his hands in his pockets. Fuyumi had dragged him out of his room. They were supposed to be having a family meal and she insisted it would be soba again, just for him. Shoto just planned on eating it all as quickly as possible and disappearing again. He was also rather distracted by his phone. Iida was on about something but was drowned out by Mina's grand stories of being back in her neighbourhood and being treated like a celebrity that everyone was terrified of. Shoto knew that feeling all too well, but as least she was enjoying it.

He felt more at home with class 1-A than he did here. Shoto had… never really gotten along well with his siblings. Not that they weren't nice to him – he just didn't know them that well. When he was younger, Shoto lived in a different part of the house to the others. He ate separately; lived separately. Father had always said that they lived in a different world, and it felt like it. Shoto hated how the two of them were trying to act like they were just a normal family. He felt so… uncomfortable.

"Come on, man," Natsuo signed, dropping the brilliant white smile. "I know you're finding it tough here, but we're trying our best."

Shoto simply shrugged, "Whatever."

There was a moment of silence between them.

"C-Come on!" Fuyumi exclaimed, clapping her hands together and putting on that smile again, "Let's eat. I don't know about you but I'm pretty hungry!"

"Is Dad coming?"

Shoto looked up. Natsuo's question was jarring – cutting through the air like a knife, at least in Shoto's perspective.

"Um…" Fuyumi started nervously. "I don't think so? I-I mean I invited him. But he's always busy, you know? Sorry."

Natsuo scoffed, "Not something to be sorry about," and he strolled towards the table, sitting down and pulling a bowl towards him.

Shoto felt the inkling of a smile tug at his lips. Suppressing it, he followed Natsuo and sat beside him, accepting the bowl that he pushed in his direction.

"So, how's college?" Fuyumi asked Natsuo, still smiling falsely.

"Fine," he replied simply.

Maybe Shoto did smile a little at that response. He might not have been able to recall another conversation he'd held with Natsuo, but he was already starting to feel like they might just be related after all.

Realising this was a dead end, Fuyumi moved onto Shoto. "What about you, Shoto? Why don't you tell us about your friends at UA?!"

Shoto paused mid-way through lifting his noodles to his mouth, "Um, which one?"

"Friends plural?" Natsuo said, raising an eyebrow, "See? That's what I call an improvement. Don't listen to what anyone says – class 1-A's the best thing that's ever happened to you."

"…Who's anyone?" Shoto narrowed his eyes, food still hovering inches from his mouth.

"Err, like, the media, I guess? I don't know – my housemates often go on about you and Dad too. They didn't realise I was a Todoroki, Todoroki, until your Sports Festival – when you showed the camera your middle finger? My friend spat out their drink and I laughed and shouted, that's my little brother! Go, Shoto, go! Screw them over! – and started an extremely uncomfortable conversation that I'd been avoiding."

Shoto had been slurping his noodles whilst he spoke, staring at him all the while. He swallowed and said, "They think me being in class 1-A is a bad thing?"

Natsuo pulled a bit of a face before continuing. "I mean, kind of, I guess. They were saying they thought having the other kids around were making the situation worse rather than better – especially that Midoriya. I disagreed – I think Midoriya's cool."

Shoto felt a pang of pride in his chest. "Midoriya is cool," he muttered. After another moment of prolonged silence in which Fuyumi looked to frightened by the dull interactions to even start eating, Shoto added, "Midoriya threatened to destroy Endeavor's career – said it'd be fun."

Natsuo chocked on his food for a moment. Fuyumi just stared at the two of them, wide eyed, until Natsuo started to laugh, "Midoriya is so cool, oh my God – can I please meet Midoriya?"

"He wouldn't… actually do that, right?" Fuyumi asked Shoto nervously.

Shoto blinked at her, making sure to eat for a little bit longer whilst she waited for his answer. "Not unless I asked him to."

Natsuo clapped his hands together and laughed even louder. "That kid just wants chaos, he's such a little fighter. The press' having a field day with him though. Have you ever seen that video of him yelling at those heroes? He really rips them a new one, all whilst being covered in this slime from battling a villain to save the very guy he later got into class A himself? You heard about all this, Fuyumi? It's kind of hard to tell what's true and what's been exaggerated."

"W-Well, I, um," she stammered. "All I know is that he seemed like a genuinely nice person when I went to pick up Shoto… Not at all like the character he portrayed during the Sports Festival. I-I think he –"

And then she stopped, food still untouched.

Blinking Shoto followed her gaze up to the door and realised that Natsuo's howling laugher had drowned out the sound of his heavy footsteps; the door opening. Until that moment, Shoto hadn't even acknowledged the shadow that now loomed over him.

"Father!" Fuyumi grinned, trying her best to mask her anxiety. "I-I thought you were too busy to –"

"Everyone's here; I should be too," Endeavor said in a tone of voice that Shoto was far from used to. It was… softer – calmer than ever before. It confused him.

But as he sat down opposite Natsuo and beside Fuyumi, Shoto's nerves went through the roof. Everything was screaming at him to leave – run – get away – Dropped his chopsticks and stood up, but before he could take a step further, his father interrupted, "Sit down, Shoto," he snapped, and Shoto knew the calm must have been a front.

He felt Natsuo's eyes on him. Shoto clenched his fists and dared to raise his eyes to meet that of his father's, "I don't want to be here," he hissed.

Endeavor didn't say a word. He simply glared at him – fire skin deep.

"C-Come on, everyone!" stammered Shoto's sister. "Please, why don't we just try to get along? For just one night? Please? Like a normal family –"

And Natsuo dropped his bowl harshly onto the table. It rocked back and forth for a moment. "We're not a normal family," he said in barely a whisper.

"Natsu please –"

"Shut up, Fuyumi!" he yelled, standing up beside Shoto. "This isn't right! Shoto's freaking scared out of his wits and it's your fault!" he pointed accusingly at Father.

Endeavor stood up too. Shoto felt himself flinch and back away a little, a motion out of his control. Natsuo did no such thing. He marched around the table to face the man head on.

"No one knows what the hell really happened with Shoto, least of all us. But what I do know, is that you're not as innocent as you try to make yourself out to be," he growled.

Endeavor did nothing but crossed his arms, waiting for his son to continue his rant.

"I am ashamed," Natsuo hissed, "I am ashamed to be a part of this family. Because we're not a family, are we? I barely even know Shoto – he's my brother and I can't remember the last time we ever sat down and ate a meal together. Remember when our cook quit, huh? And Fuyumi and I took over cooking? I know you didn't let Shoto eat my food because it wasn't the freaking right diet for him. And you dare to act surprised that he ran away?! Because I would have! In fact, I kind of did, didn't I?! And I've been waiting to say this to you for so long – because you don't deserve – y-you don't deserve…" he lost his trail of thought, standing there in front of Endeavor as the temperature in the room plummeted, a fault of Natsuo's winter wind Quirk, no doubt. At least, Shoto was fairly sure that was his power – or maybe that was Fuyumi's…

"What don't I deserve?" Endeavor said in a deep, menacing voice.

Natsuo gritted his teeth and looked up at him again. Endeavor was nearly a head taller than him, and Natsuo already loomed above both Shoto and Fuyumi.

"You don't deserve a thing," he replied. "I know what I am to you – a mistake; not the kid you wanted. Just like Fuyumi – just like Toya –" (Shoto tensed at the name –) "You know I think this is the first time you've really looked at me, in years – maybe even freaking ever! Because you just don't care, do you? You don't care. All you wanted was someone to carry on with your stupid legacy – did you ever stop to think that maybe Shoto doesn't want that, huh?! You neglected us – your family! I remember Mum screaming and Shoto crying – not to mention what happened to Toya!"

"Do not," Endeavor thundered, making Natsuo finally take a step back, "mention that name in this house."

"W-What? Toya?" Natsuo dared to say. He summoned up his courage again, "You know you killed him. It's your fault he died. You know he used to come to me – his younger brother – freaking crying about why he existed in the first place?! I was too young for that – he was too young for that! And it's your fault!"

Shoto stood in the background in silence. Natsuo didn't know – no one knew. Toya was Dabi. Toya hadn't died in the fire of his own creation all those years ago. People like Natsuo, they lived in a blissful ignorance of it all. But from what Shoto knew of Natsuo now, if he learnt the truth, Shoto wouldn't be surprised at all if he just laughed.

He couldn't bear to stand there for a moment longer. Shoto ignored Fuyumi's pleas; Natsuo's continued argument; Endeavor's rising temperature and stormed out of a side door to the room, back down those winding corridors to his room.

He paced back and forth there for a while longer, knowing it was only a matter of time before someone came after him. Shoto blinked and he found himself lying on his bed, brick phone in hand, raised to his ear. The number dialled only once, before, wide eyed, Shoto realised what he was doing and quickly hung up.

About a minute later, he rung a second number. He didn't have time to have second thoughts this time. The recipient picked up within milliseconds.

"Shoto?" came Midoriya's voice.

He felt himself relax a little, breathing a small sigh of relief, "Hey."

"A-Are you ok?" his friend asked nervously, clearly expecting the worse.

Shoto sat down on his bed, "I… I'm sorry, I don't know why I called."

"No, no, no! It's ok, really. I mean, I don't know if UA will be able to pick up on this but either way it doesn't really matter you can call me whenever you want – I'm not busy!" he said at a million miles per hour.

"What are you… doing?"

"Oh, just… researching stuff."

"What kind of stuff?"

"All kinds! You'd be surprised – I thought it would be Iida calling me, to be honest. There's something going on with him and I'm trying to figure out what…"

"…It's Iida, I'm sure he's ok."

"Yeah, but I don't have anything else to do anyway. Except maybe study. I guess I should be doing that – I haven't even touched the English homework yet. Present Mic is funny and all, but he's really cruel with our homework. I don't understand half of this."

"Maybe it would be easier if we didn't keep chasing him out of the classroom."

Midoriya let out a laugh, "G-Good point! Maybe I should ask Honenuki – you know he's fluent?"

"No, I didn't know that."

"Well, yeah! He's really smart."

"Because class B actually had to put some effort into getting into UA?"

"…Good point. Anyway, err – is there a reason you're calling? Actually, wait, you already answered that, didn't you? You said you weren't sure – but that's ok! We can keep talking if you want?"

Shoto closed his eyes and exhaled, his free hand gripping the covers of his bed as he tried to ground himself.

"Shoto?"

"Yeah?"

"Sorry, you just… went quiet there."

"Oh, sorry."

"It's ok! You can just have me on the phone if you want – we don't even have to talk! UA's paying these phone bills, might as well put them to good use."

Shoto nodded, then realised Midoriya wouldn't have been able to see that, "Yeah," he replied, and lay down on his bed, phone beside him on his pillow.

Midoriya didn't say much more. Eventually, he must have turned back to his laptop, because Shoto could hear him typing away frantically, and sometimes the scratching sound of a pen in his infamous notebook.

"Who are you writing about?" Shoto asked.

He was quite sure that made Midoriya jump because he heard him drop his pen and mutter about being clumsy for a moment before replying, "Err, Kirishima, at the moment. Fell on a dead end with Iida… Kirishima did a lot of stuff as a vigilante, you know. I like his vigilante name – went as Red Riot."

"Like Crimson Riot, the hero?"

"Yeah! Exactly! I didn't think you'd get that!"

"I think he's mentioned him before. I don't know, I just recognised the name. Why are you writing about him?"

"His page was just a little empty. And Mina was talking with him on the group chat about it all. They live pretty close; I think they met up the other day with some old friends."

"I didn't think you were allowed to do that."

"No… you're probably right."

They grew silent again. Shoto felt his eyes grow heavy. He would have fallen asleep if he didn't hear the distant sounds of shouting growing louder. He jerked up at the sound of a door crashing, followed by eerie silence.

"Is… everything ok?" Midoriya questioned. He must have heard that through the phone.

Shoto didn't reply immediately. The beating of his heart was too loud for his head to turn over words.

"Shoto?"

"Midoriya I can't do this," he heard himself say.

"You can't do… Oh, Shoto, wait, listen to me. You're almost there –"

"It's been two days I can't –"

"Exactly – so you're… err, wait – yeah, thirty percent-ish of the way through!"

There were footsteps approaching.

"Shoto, please, you can do this! Then you'll be back at UA and we can all mess with Present Mic again and pretend to escape so we can fight class B a-and we could ask Mina to teach us how to play video games and Yaoyorozu will come back with all those teas she's been talking about and –"

The door began to slide open.

Shoto grabbed the phone and jumped off his bed, reversing to the back of the room only to see –

"Shoto?"

"W-Who's that?" Midoriya called out.

Shoto relaxed a little, "It's um, Natsuo – my brother."

"Your – oh, oh, ok, t-that, that… brother…"

"Are you alright?" Natsuo asked, eyes flipping between Shoto and his phone. He couldn't have heard what Midoriya said.

Shoto wavered a moment before answering, "…Yeah. Um… thank you."

"Who are you talking to?"

"Midoriya."

"Oh! That's cool – real cool, yeah, um, tell him I said hi."

"Wait –" Shoto sat down on his bed and indicated for Natsuo to sit down next to him. There was no speaker option on the brick phones, or at least, he didn't know how to find it if there was one; Shoto had never called on one of these things before. However, if he turned the volume up exceedingly high, Midoriya's voice was clear enough for both of them to make it out even if the phone was left on the bedside.

"Say hi, Midoriya," Shoto said into the phone.

"Oh, hello!"

"Hey, I'm Shoto's brother," Natsuo smiled as he sat down, "But he's already said that."

Midoriya laughed a little. "I'd introduce myself, but I think my reputation proceeds me…"

"Do you get that often now?" Natsuo grinned even wider.

"Err, well I haven't actually left the house since I arrived for the home visits, so I'm just judging from what I've read online. I err… yeah, I'm not that keen on leaving the house to be honest – I think people might actually recognise me," he laughed again as though he couldn't quite believe it.

They talked about the neighbourhood around Midoriya for a while, and then where their house was in comparison. They weren't actually that far apart, come to think of it.

"I watched that Sports Festival of yours and Shoto's on TV at university. Honestly the best one I've ever watched. You lot did amazing," Natsuo told them both.

"Thank you!" Midoriya beamed over the phone. "Although I didn't really do that much – everyone else really –"

"Don't talk yourself down, you were the ringleader!"

"Of the circus," Shoto scoffed, and the other two laughed.

"Yeah, you did awesome," Natsuo insisted. "I was just saying to Shoto that I wanted to meet you – that speech you did at the end was legendary, man. My favourite bit was when you thanked the hero kid, and he gave you a sad thumbs up – almost peed myself."

"What, Honenuki?"

"Yeah, yeah! Hilarious, the poor guy. I can't believe he kept that secret of you being Quirkless for so long."

"Me neither! Apparently, it was because whenever he tried to tell his class, they'd just talk over him, so he got annoyed and gave up."

Natsuo burst into laughter. Shoto couldn't help but smile.

The three of them kept talking for a while longer, well, mainly Natsuo and Midoriya. Perhaps they realised Shoto didn't want to speak much; maybe they were just as engrossed in the conversation as he was. Either way, it was… nice.

"Anyway, I gotta go," Natsu finally announced. "I'm, err… yeah – don't think I'm that welcome here."

After realising Natsu wasn't referring to being welcome in Shoto's room, his heart plummeted – he was talking about the house as a whole. The argument between him and Endeavor must have ended on a bad note, as expected, but what did that mean for Shoto?

"–And I've got to go back to college, I have classes tomorrow," he finished.

"What are you studying?" Midoriya asked.

"Health and welfare."

"Oh, cool!"

"Any idea what you're gonna do next, Midoriya?"

"Err… Let's just say I have a few ideas."

Natsuo laughed, "Ok – well, good luck with them."

"Thanks."

"See you around, Shoto," Natsu smiled, standing up. "You watch out for each other, ok?" And with that, he waved goodbye and left. Shoto was painfully aware that he didn't know if he'd be seeing him again any time soon.

"He's nice!" Midoriya called out. Shoto had almost forgotten he was there.

"Yeah," Shoto nodded, "He is."

"Fuyumi's with you too, right?"

"Um, yeah."

"That's cool! You're family's nice."

It was an interesting choice of words, although, Midoriya likely hadn't thought them over too much.

"Some of them are," Shoto replied after a moment of thought.

"Hm…"

They didn't stay on the phone for much longer after that. Midoriya's mother had called him over for dinner, and after briefly saying hello to her, Shoto finally put the phone down.

It was late. He was hungry because he hadn't had much of the dinner Fuyumi had so kindly prepared for them all, but there was no way Shoto would be leaving his room to go looking for any leftovers. Feeling far more comfortable than he had earlier, Shoto got back into bed and turned off the lights. He didn't sleep, but he was never going to, knowing his father could have still been somewhere in the house.

It was past midnight when his phone lit up and began to ring again. Shoto stared at it from afar, taking in the black digits of a number not saved on the phone, but familiar, nonetheless.

He didn't pick up.