Chapter 11
Lisa
"Yes." The word leaves my mouth before I have a chance to think about it. Jennie doesn't say anything, doesn't react. Her lashes come together in a blink, and she looks at me, almost as if she's waiting for me to tell her I'm joking.
Then she smiles.
It's the most beautiful thing in the world. And right now, with her hands on my chest and my arms locked around her waist, I want to kiss her hard and tell her I'd take her on a thousand dates and it wouldn't be enough.
The moment is over as fast as it started, and I'm sure she's thinking the same thing I am. She lives in Chicago. I live in Indy. We're not worlds away, but a four-hour drive makes starting a relationship hard.
I don't know the next time I'll be able to get away from work long enough to come see her. It could be weeks before I'm able to drive back up north and take her on a second date.
My heart starts to ache, even though everything I want is right in front of me for the taking. Jennie slides her hands down my torso and around my back. She rests her head on my chest and admires the skyline above us.
This is exactly what I've wanted, what I've wished for. And now that I had a taste, now that I know how fucking good it feels to finally let my feelings surface, it's going to hurt. I need to disengage.
"It's getting late."
"Yeah," Jennie agrees, pulling away. Instantly, I miss her touch and the warmth of her skin. "We should head back. If you want to crash on the couch, you can. Do you have to be back at the convention thingy tomorrow?"
"There are a few more panels to sit in on, but I don't have to be there until nine. It's the last day and they'll be done around two."
"That was a short convention."
"It started earlier in the week, but I couldn't get off work."
She clasps her hands on her elbows, holding her arms in tightly against her body to stay warm. Not pulling her close goes against every fiber of my being, like I'm wired to do everything and anything to make her comfortable.
"Do you like being a surgeon?"
"I do. I better, right? I've put enough into it."
"Yeah. You'd have wasted a lot of time if not."
We go a few paces without talking, and I hate how much the dynamic changed between us. It's because of me, and Jennie has to fucking know it. A gust of wind blows in off the lakefront. It's cold, chilling me and I'm in long sleeves and pants.
I can't help it. My arm wraps around Jennie and the moment we connect, I relax.
"Do you want my shirt?"
"Then you'll be half-naked."
"I have an undershirt," I remind her. "I should have worn the suit jacket just so I could give it to you."
She tries not to smile. "That would have been very gentlemanly. Though you'd think I'd learn to dress for the weather. I have lived here for quite some time. When the wind blows over the lake, it's always cold."
Not wanting to make her walk in the cold, I hail a cab. There's not much traffic this time of night, and we get back to the loft quickly.
"You really can stay," she says again, taking off her shoes. I don't move out of the entryway. I shouldn't stay though I want to. "Or you can call an Uber to take you back to your hotel."
I pull my phone from my pocket and see that it's dead. Jennie says she has an extra charger and that I shouldn't leave until my phone has some battery life in case I need to make an emergency call. She reminds me of her mother there, and it's more endearing than I thought it'd be. She goes into her room to get the charger. I step out of my shoes and sit in the living room, looking around at the décor. The stark modernity of the space isn't something I'd guess Jennie would have gone for, but the view is amazing and she's close to her office. She's done a good job making this large, white space look homey and feel cozy.
Everything is so Jennie, tasteful yet a little quirky.
"Here ya go." She comes back into the living room, holding a phone cord, and crouches down next to the couch to plug it into the wall. Then she takes my phone from me and hooks it up.
She takes a step back and crosses her arms over her body again. I hate that she feels like she has to physically guard herself from me. Hurting her is the last thing I want to do, which is exactly why we need to stop this before it starts. "I'm going to get some water. Do you want some?"
"Yeah, thanks."
I watch her go into the kitchen, cats following her in hopes of more food. Her dress hugs her curves in all the right places. It's loose around her legs, hiding her tight ass until she moves and the outline can be seen through the thin fabric. The neckline of her dress goes to a deep-V, tight against her tits.
She moves her hair over her shoulder and picks up the cats' water bowl, rinsing it out and filling it up before she grabs two water bottles from the fridge and comes back to the couch. Taking a long drink, she recaps her water and sits back with a sigh.
I thought she was a little drunk before. Nothing like pulling a Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde to make a girl sober up.
My phone buzzes back to life, beeping from a missed text. I glance over, curious to see who it's from but not really interested in opening it. Then I see it's from my mom. There's only one reason she'd text me this late. I put the water bottle on the coffee table and turn away from Jennie to unlock my phone.
My heart speeds up and I try to prepare myself for the worst. I always do. Because someday, the worst will happen.
Mom: Bobby passed out. We just got to the hospital. I tried calling you, but it went straight to voicemail. I hate leaving you messages like this, but I wanted to tell you in case…you know. I'll update you when I can.
The next text was sent sometime later.
Mom: It's his kidneys again, and they're putting him on some new medication. We'll be home in the morning. Don't worry about calling tonight. We're all exhausted and I know how hard you've been working. We're proud of you, Lisa. Love you.
"Lisa?" Jennie's voice is as soft as her touch. Her hand lands on my arm. "Is everything okay?"
I read the text again. One of these times, medical intervention isn't going to be enough. One of these times, my brother is going to take it so far there's no coming back. Years of drug use have already taken their toll on his body, and he's only a year and a half older than me.
"Is everything okay?" she asks again.
I put my phone down, shifting my gaze from the bright screen to Jennie's beautiful face.
"It will be."
She pushes her hair back and nods. "Are you tired?" she asks carefully, and I read between the lines. She's wondering if I'm going to stay or go, though I can't tell what she's hoping for.
"Not really."
"Oh, uh, okay."
Silence falls between us, and over the noise of the city below, I can hear my own heart pounding away in my chest. Jennie tucks her legs up under herself and leans forward to pet Lego, who jumped up next to me, purring. Jennie's dress gaps and her tits almost spill out. The will of the gods couldn't keep me from stealing a glance. The faint outline of her nipple is visible through the thin material of a light purple bra. There's no padding. No pushup. I want to bury my face between her breasts and kiss my way down to her sweet cunt.
My cock jumps as an intense wave of desire crashes over me. I don't know how much longer I can resist her. It was one thing when I wasn't sure if she wanted me too, but after tonight I know she does.
I want her so fucking bad. But I shouldn't.
"Well, I had a nice time," Jennie starts, not looking away from the cat. "Even if you didn't, I did. So, uh, thanks for taking me out on our non-date."
"What makes you think I didn't have a nice time too?"
She brings her arms back in and shrugs, shyly flicking her gaze to mine. "I don't know."
"I did, Jennie. I had a nice time, too."
She brings her head up, this time staring at me dubiously. "You seemed to like it until the end. Again. And I just—" She cuts off, letting out an exasperated sigh. "You know what, it's fine. Never mind. It's like you're playing a game whenever we're together, giving me just enough of yourself to make me want more. You open up only to shut me out, and even if I had all the cheat codes to force a win, this isn't a game I want to play." She closes her eyes, jaw tense, and stands. "I'll call you an Uber. It's late and I'm sure you're tired."
"Jennie, don't."
"Why? One minute I think you like me and the next you can't get away from me fast enough. I can't figure you out, Lisa, and it's making me feel really fucking stupid."
I get to my feet and grab her wrist, gently pulling her hand toward me. I take her phone and toss it on the couch.
And then I kiss her.
