Fireworks
Explosion 07: The Start of Operation: LMFOA
(Let Me be your Friend Obtuse Asshole)
Let it not be said, but Katsuki is not a quitter. She is stubborn as hell and one difficult bitch when she already made her decision. But of course, Katsuki's stubbornness is within bounds to the logic she adheres to, and she knows when to call it quits when necessary.
So, when Katsuki said that she's gonna be friends with one Shinsou Hitoshi, sleep deprived cynic extraordinaire, that means Katsuki is gonna be friends with Shinsou fucking Hitoshi. End of the fucking story.
Insomniac Lord Talkshitter might make it difficult for her, because he is one obtuse asshole, but that does not mean she would just let that go.
Katsuki is the bitch and her Mama and Kaa-san didn't raise any pussy. Katsuki said 'fuck you' to the thieves/suicide bombers that ended her first life with the eloquence of a queen in her own turf, so no teenage purple Albert Einstein looking ass is going to make her go away with a few barb words and pointed cynicism.
"Why do you keep coming back? Do you have nothing better to do than to stalk someone? Or are you some masochist?"
Boy, Shinsou even needs to do better than that. Please, his words barely hit, he needs some serious fact checker on what hurts and what doesn't. Katsuki glares at the other students looking at them and probably making up a whole ass story in their little minds. Her glare does its job and dismisses their onlookers by her sheer aura alone.
Damn, even in the different side of town she's still got it.
Her red eyes slid back to Shinsou's bored purple. "I'm just here to ask if any of the shitstains are still bothering you, they got expelled and they might be trying to find someone to let out their steam on."
"As you can see, they haven't." He deadpans, spinning around for good measure. "So go on, shoo." Then he makes a shooing motion with his hand, as if she was some unruly dog.
This bastard.
But patience, Katsuki has come for another reason.
"I'm also inviting you to my fucking birthday, Kaa-san said that i should try bringing other friends home so she can show off her cooking skills."
Purple guy stared at her like she's an alien.
"We're friends?"
Katsuki rolls her eyes. "Duh? We are, you're just denying it."
"Gee, I was never informed about this arrangement." Mr. McSassy sassed, like the ass that he is. "Then again, you're probably used to getting your way. Must be the privilege of being an elite in the quirk pyramid, managing to force anyone to do whatever you want."
And of course, the bastard started talking shit again. Like clockwork whenever Katsuki even says Hi to him when they happen to cross each other on the street.
Who does he think he is? This Sassy Flatassed Bitch better be grateful that she has great patience towards the misunderstood and scarred bastards like him, or else she would have decked him as she normally would.
Besides, not that what he says can reach any deeper than her skin. Compared to what she experienced so far in her twice damned life.
Katsuki has already been a teenager twice, and in both lives, raised in a typical Asian household. Though to be fair, her second parents are milder compared to her Ma, Tatay and Lola combined.
So as one Shinsou Hitoshi tried and failed to roast her, Katsuki only lets one eyebrow rise to signify that yeah, he should do better than those subpar jabs, Katsuki's senile Grand Aunt could do better than that.
"—eah right. Ha, you're just trying to appease your ego, your benign sense of superiority by trying to make 'friends' with me. I know what you're doing, and you're nothing more than a hypocrite."
Katsuki has been raised by her first parents – Mama – by always comparing her to others so Katsuki would grow up never feeling good enough.
Been criticized by other relatives for not being lady-like and girly.
Been looked down by her first life classmates for being the youngest.
Been consoled by a 'friend' for losing an Arnis tournament because 'you're just a girl'.
Bitch, Katsuki's was even criticized by her own neighbor for having no boyfriend when all three of her daughters were teenage mothers.
So whatever Shinsou has to say, she's heard it all before and then some.
All the things this kid has to say are nothing in the ranks of full-grown foul-mouthed nosy aunties that have too much time in their hands. It's all fucking soapy bubbles in comparison.
Shinsou turned away after saying his personal piece that she didn't personally take. Some of his points are true but most of them aren't. And despite what everyone fucking says about her, Katsuki can take insults and criticisms to the face without blowing a gasket, well, relatively speaking that she fucking can.
Unless Katsuki is directly pissed at that person's existence then it would be a different fucking conversation.
And Katsuki could see where Shinsou was coming from. He is a butt hurt kid from all the shit he got from the shitty system, continually harrassed by others, and by doing this he is just trying to protect himself. Like a snarling kitty who's only ever got hurt by humans.
Right now, Katsuki is more amused than mad at Shinsou, and maybe a bit contemplative about what he said. Because wow, a different point of view about herself made Katsuki realize some shit she hadn't noticed about herself.
(Like despite Katsuki's best effort, she won't be able to get rid of her pride and arrogance for being the best at what she does. What can she say? Being an arrogant prideful bitch is a part of her, it's her defense mechanism to avoid feeling small and inadequate. It's how she survived the pressure of maintaining her status as her last parent's golden child. It's unhealthy, she knows, but what else can you do when whatever you do would never be enough in their eyes.)
Shinsou really is smart.
Smart, observant and clever. A cynic by a kilometer and a logical person by half.
He and murder hobo Jesus would get along well, Katsuki just knows it. Actually, it wouldn't be far off if she learns that they are relatives, they have the same damn grin to be comfortable with.
The only thing missing is if Shinsou is also a cat person.
"Ya know, you're fucking right." Katsuki agrees blithely.
Shinsou didn't appear to hear her, that is if not for his shoulders hunching forward the slightest tad but otherwise continued walking away from her. She didn't bother to follow him either, Katsuki knows when she needs to impose herself boldly, this is not one of those.
"But you're also wrong." A slight pause and Katsuki's determined gaze pinned Shinsou when he turned to look back. "And I'm going to show you how you're wrong. See ya on my birthday, asshole. I'll message you in your LINER account!" She gave one last grin before turning around to wave.
Katsuki says nothing more, mind already coming up with a way to spend her afternoon after saying her invitation.
Hmm… maybe she could check out the new Filipino restaurant and see if it really is authentic. A halo-halo would be really nice right now.
Izuku and Katsuki are at her room, working with their English and Math assignments spread across the desk, with Science, Japanese and History piled to the side for a later date. So far, everything is going well and they are making a dent in their course work, both are even doing some tasks for their future lessons. Doing something in advance never hurts anyone, especially if you could laze around later and watch your classmates struggle doing theirs at the last minute.
Katsuki and Izuku have accurately predicted their teachers' course works before through the years of schooling with their combined efforts, both of them cruising around the upper class percentile consistently without fail. It's all a piece of cake really, with Izuku's analysis skills and Katsuki's prior knowledge and from mooching off from their teachers and Senpais.
(The only problem she's got with is History and Japanese, other subjects are pretty much the same.)
Their combined efforts in predicting the next schoolworks and projects have yet to fail since its first conception. Izuku as the brains of the operation and, much to her surprise and dismay, Katsuki as the people's person.
How the fuck that happened is beyond her, maybe it's because unlike the insecure preteens prowling the schoolgrounds, Katsuki is the one who is the most comfortable at her own skin. And if she's gonna believe what her Pa and Izuku keeps repeating, because of her natural cha-fuck-risma, which is unlikely and a pile of cow shit.
Or maybe because she had such a reputation that they aren't able to say no to her inquiries, too afraid to be the butt end of her lit fireworks stick.
Whatever it is, Katsuki is not gonna question it, must be the universe colluding to give her luck and better RNG than the last one.
"How's training? If you're doing fucking more than you already are, I'm tattling to Yagi-san."
Katsuki watched her friend twitch, one of his tells when he's uncomfortable.
This idiot, Katsuki glared because she knew she is right on the fucking money.
"You dumbass," Katsuki starts, cutting off whatever dumb excuse her dumbass friend could come up with.
"Overextending yourself won't make you any better, letting your body recover is part of the strengthening process you little shit. If ya keep doing that, instead of getting better, you're more liable to break something. Our body isn't still done growing and I know that you fucking know that, but if you're going to keep being like this then you're stunting your own growth."
After her rant Deku looked like a chastised child after breaking a precious flower vase, but in this case, Katsuki is preventing him from breaking himself.
Why do I feel like he would be doing that more often in the future?
Katsuki can already foresee the future migraines Izuku will give her.
But anywho, Katsuki had already seen Izuku's full training menu that she plied (demanded) out of All Might's hands. She did that not out of nosiness and probable possible training tips, Katsuki did that to know that the hero ain't heaping a lot of shit on Deku's head.
It's a plausible concern, okay?
After all, All Might was so obviously himself despite all the means he tried to hide that he was the All Might. Katsuki trusts him to make Deku into a hero, but she does not trust him enough with the concern of Izuku's well being.
So, what if he's a great hero?
That does not mean that Katsuki would trust him fully to know what's good for her best friend. To be frank, the man doesn't look like he is cut out for mentoring, his explanations about certain things are bizarre or at times only made sense to himself.
And as far as Katsuki knows, All Might has no teaching experience whatsoever and it showed. He makes up for the bullshit explanation for being a great morale boost to her scrawny friend.
(It's a great thing Izuku is so smart, if he was really a Deku as the haters say he was then the Hero Dream would take a whole lot of more work other than dedication.)
Too bad that genius does not translate well to Izuku's goal-oriented brain.
"Well?" The one word was spoken imperiously, one delicate eyebrow raised and flinty red eyes bore down on guilty emerald green eyes.
"I, I just want to,"
Here comes the waterworks. Katsuki rolled her eyes but got out a box of tissues from her knapsack in preparation.
Just as expected, Izuku started crying, Katsuki gently patting the tears away with the tissue.
"I just want to ca-ca-catch up to you. I'm so-sorry."
Sighing for good measure, Katsuki handed him the box and ruffled his fluffy curled hair.
"Come on Deku, I told ya that I won't wait for you to catch up. That means, if you break yourself before you could set start, then how the fuck are you going to catch up?"
"I'm sorry Kacchan for be-being impatient. I just really wa-want to become a hero alongside you."
Izuku blew his nose and threw it in the trash can beside her desk. He looked at Katsuki with wide tearful eyes, pleading and arms extended to her. And since Katsuki is not always immune to her friend's baby animal tendencies, she rolled her eyes again and opened her arms wide. Izuku did not disappoint, and was quick to leap towards her in a hug.
"You do know, that I know, that you have thrice to work hard for." Because you know, the quirkless thing. Katsuki hummed and rubbed his back, the baby sighed to her neck with a sniffle, making a vague nod through his home at her shoulder.
"And you know what I say about hard work? Do you at least fucking remember that through the fucking random hero factoids?"
With one last sniff, Izuku unburied himself from her right shoulder, enough to look Katsuki in the eyes.
"To work smarter not harder?"
"Exactly." Katsuki squashes his mop of hair down with a heavy hand, making the boy squawk indignantly. "Then why the fuck are acting stupid? Use that big brain of yours, Bushhead!"
"Ow! Stop it Kacchan! I, I get it already! Ow!"
Katsuki scoffed but stopped her assault after thoroughly tousling his hair into a bigger mess. Crossing her arms, she gave him a glare.
"You better be, I'm not cleaning up after your tissue paper storm when you find out that you actually manage to break yourself. And if you wanna get broken, don't bother."
Katsuki gave him a grin full of teeth, one could say it was taken from a certain sleep deprived teacher, the gleam in her red eyes is nothing short of unholy and making her target shiver in fear.
"I can do that for you."
"I, I got it! Cry-Crystal!"
Katsuki snorted. "Yeah, right." She turned away from him and picked up her pen, circling the right verb tense to be used on sentence number four. Four, yon or shi, hmmm….
"By the way, the obtuse asshole is still being obtuse. He called me a mix bag of ego, superiority and inferiority complex with the side dish of being a hypocrite."
She removed the pen on her paper because she knew of what was to come.
Izuku's fearful expression is exchanged to fiery indignation as he slaps the tabletop. The table shook with its content, their tea barely escaped being spilled.
"That guy said what?"
All her curses about almost destroying all their work were drowned out by Izuku's next rant.
"How can he say such a thing?!" The freckled teen screeches in outrage. Katsuki has only seen this vehement reaction before twice, both times being Izuku incensed on her behalf. How funny, Deku only ever seems to get angry when she's not the one who's pissed.
"Yeah it's true that you might have a bit of an ego and too much confidence than most people but it's not like it's unwarranted when you're, you're – You!" Great descriptions Deku, it almost sounds like you're insulting me. "You're just super self-assured of who you already are unlike most teenagers who still can't even figure out what they want on a vending machine, but that doesn't mean you're egotistic that Shinsou-san could call you one. To be honest, I'm envious of your confidence."
Okay, maybe I just opened a fucking Pandora's box.
She tried her best to will away the flush that's slowly creeping up from her neck. Katsuki didn't try to stop him, because once fucking Deku got on his passionate angry rants there is no way stopping him. Because every word she could have said will all be shot down before it could gain traction with more logical rapping after logical rapping. The best course of action here is for Katsuki to take her best friend's compliments like a fucking champ and try not to die of embarrassment by blushing like a damn virgin.
Katsuki hates herself for having the rare ability to follow rap verses and actually understand them, including the fucking mumble ones. And that she had learned Nihongo too fucking well where she can understand the nerd when he is mishmashing thirty syllables in one single breath.
"I wish I could be half as confident as you are in talking to strangers. And so what if you're extremely competitive! It's that drive and passion for everything that you do is what makes you so inspiring! You work really hard for things that you want to be great at, even if it's entirely out of spite or pettiness, and you're really great at everything that you worked for! So what if you like setting a bar of expectation for yourself? There's nothing wrong with having standards, specifically high standards for yourself. It just means that you hold yourself to a high degree that's connected to your astonishing self-confidence that I said earlier. You're a perfectionist, you know it and are not afraid to show it. And really? A Hypocrite? That's fucking bullshit!"
Good God, her mom better not have fucking heard that! Or Katsuki would never hear the end of another curse-filled tirade.
"You, Kacchan, are the most honest and most genuine person I've ever met! And every word you've ever said is always backed by actions. You're the type to never go back on your words and always follow through to the point of stupid or even just entirely out of spite." Midoriya Izuku stares at her with shining green eyes, all teary, determined and frustrated on her behalf.
"Even when everyone– society has told you to not associate with a quirkless nobody like me, you still stayed by my side because you promised that we will always be friends. You kept cheering me on, always encouraging me to become a hero despite learning my quirkless status, you never wavered once Katsuki. Even when my own Mom…" He trailed off, closing his eyes and inhaling deeply to try and stave off his tears.
And no, she's not teary eyed at all, her eyeballs are just fucking sweating from how fast her eyelids are blinking.
After a while, Izuku just gives up and is full on crying now, fat tears trailing down his freckled cheeks as he keeps wiping it with tissue after tissue.
"It's not true." A sniffle. Geez, it's been a long time since Izuku cried because of frustration. "You're no-not a hypocrite, you're the farthest from being a hypocrite. You're so genuine that it's hard to– I'm saying this again," Izuku stops his futile attempt at keeping his face clean and looks straight into Katsuki's red eyes, brimming with earnestness that it's hard to look away.
"I'm incredibly lucky to have a friend like you, Katsuki."
He breaks the silent stare down after five seconds to glare down at his hands in frustration.
"And Shinsou-san still hasn't realized that about you."
Really? Katsuki couldn't help the soft smile gracing her face, but before Deku could even think to look up again and catch a glimpse of Katsuki being fucking soft, she leans forward quickly to give her fucking best friend a fucking hug because he fucking needs one and Katsuki is damn generous like that.
"Yep, he fucking hasn't. But that won't be long in time."
She feels Izuku's arms circle her back and squeeze his face and his coldass nose to her neck like he always does. The things Katsuki puts up with. He better be fucking greatful that he's cute.
Deku giggles wetly at her words, separating himself from his face, appearing a tad embarrassed judging by the blush on his freckled cheeks. Her best friend is damn adorable, and anyone who says otherwise can get blasted to the face.
"I don't know if I should laugh or pray for him."
"Oi!" She knocks a knuckle to his nogging but it only made Bushhead giggle more.
"Fucking troll doll better be grateful that I'm making a life long commitment in being his friend. I don't do shit half assed, and he better learn that I don't leave shit alone for long. Operation: Let Me be your Friend Obtuse Asshole or Operation LMFOA is a go. And you're going to help me, Shitty Broccoli."
Deku scoffs at that, a glint of mischief in his verdant green eyes. Man, Katsuki is such a bad fucking influence.
"He doesn't know you at all," Then he grins, one that Katsuki mirrors, but hers is far more feral and sadistic. "And I can't wait for the look on his face the moment he realizes that resistance is damn futile."
"Well fucking said brother–" It slips out her tongue before she can stop herself, but either way, she's not taking it back.
"Well fucking said."
It's not like it isn't true. Katsuki had always thought of him as a brother, not to mention that they've known each other since they were in their fucking diapers so it's not like she's reaching. And it wasn't even the first time she called him her brother, just that the result of the word gives a specific reaction. Katsuki stretches her arms to accept her fate.
Silence rained for about nine seconds before Katsuki once again got bushy hair under her nose.
"UWAAA KACCHAN!"
Guess here is Waterworks #7 of the day, Deku better be hydrating himself well for this shit. Her Kaa-san is not gonna like this when she sees this.
As if summoned from whatever shitty ritual the fucking Universe concocted to give Katsuki migraines, her mother slams the door wide open and in her right hand she is balancing a tray of snacks and juice.
"BAKUGOU KATSUKI! WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO?!"
Godfuckingdamnit.
Omake: Leftovers
Hitoshi eyed the aggressive blonde teen akin to a grenade with the pin off. Which isn't too far off given Bakugou's quirk and that she is currently shoving something to his face.
"What is this?"
Bakugou frowns at him in incredulity. Like Hitoshi is an idiot. "Can't you see that it's cake and food?"
Behind her, Midoriya sighs and shakes his head, giving Hitoshi another one of those pitying eyes.
And the other boy only ever gives him that look when his friend is about to do something ridiculous to Hitoshi's confusion and migraine.
He schools his face to neutrality, lifting a hand to push the wrapped stack of tupperwares out of his face.
"And why are you giving it to me?" He inquired slowly. "Is this some sort of charity?"
Bakugou in turn shoves the containers into his arms and Hitoshi had no other choice but to catch it lest it spill on the floor and upset the devil. He is almost tempted to use his quirk because he knows that this girl is not afraid to retort and talk back to him with colorful words, but he digresses, doing that would give him an even bigger migraine to nurse back home.
"No Furby Reject, do I look like a fucking philanthropist to you?" She raises one eyebrow at him because yeah, point taken. She crosses her arm against her chest, scoffs at him and her nose turns up, looking away from him and…
Is that a fucking blush on her cheeks?
What the fuck?
What the fuck?
Is he hallucinating? Or did somebody use their quirk to play a prank on him? It wouldn't be the first time if that was the case.
"You didn't come to my fucking birthday when I fucking invited you to. So here I am, being fucking generous and hand delivering you food because your fucking skinny ass needs it. You need to fucking eat more you fucking twig, if ya want to become a hero then better start with your shitty diet you damn beanpole!" Then she pulls out a folded piece of paper from her bag and once again, shoves it into Hitoshi's hand. "There! Because I'm feeling being fucking nice today, a list of food menu to improve your diet and a set of exercises for you to try! And you better fucking follow it to the letter if you really wanna improve, hmph!"
Hitoshi could only stare blankly at the girl as she turns away from him and power walks to leave.
"See you later, Blueberry Pocky!"
Midoriya bows to him politely in goodbye but can't quite hide his snickering, then he turns away too and just leaves.
"Wait up Kacchan!"
What–
Hitoshi stares at the package in his arms as if it would answer his questions.
–the fuck just happened?
He blinks at the innocent piece of paper on his right hand and single-handedly unfolds it with the other holding the wrapped containers. Hitoshi blankly stares at the surprisingly neat and beautiful handwriting listing down a nutritious diet and a daily exercise routine. It was all well thought out, all comparable to that one Eraserhead exercise routine video that has about 67 or so views on HeroTube – the disgruntled underground hero admitted it being a dare from his friend and to prove that he is, not at all, camera shy – it's like it was written by a real training coach if not for the offensive words written along the list.
Hitoshi is flabbergasted and confused beyond belief.
How the hell did she even know that I want to become a hero?
He only remembers mentioning it once when Hitoshi was having a bad day and particularly being vicious with his words. He remembers Bakugou just standing there, looking him in the eyes as he continued to air his grievances out, even nodding along to some parts of his speech. Hitoshi only remembers that particular interaction because of what Bakugou said about the Quirkism he experienced.
"I say, fuck whatever everyone says and do your own shit. Quirks are just extensions of ourselves, not who we fucking are, it's like saying I have an explosive personality because I have an explosive quirk. Bitch please, I'm this way because of the endless amount of stupid people and it bolsters my desire to be a complete bitch to them."
"My, how spiteful."
"Careful, you almost sound like you're complimenting me, Eyebags."
That can't possibly be it, right? Bakugou couldn't be listening to him so thoroughly that she actually remembered what he said. That's just ridiculous.
Why would she even take a throwaway line seriously?
Wait, maybe it's her own way of mocking him, it's her own way of telling him that he couldn't possibly be able to do the exercises listed down so neatly.
…
(He ignores the part of himself that hopes that she was really listening to him. That she was taking him seriously. Hitoshi digs a hole for that hope and buries it down, so that it could stay dead and not hurt himself for having expectations.)
…
Well if that's the case, Hitoshi has a lot of pent up spite to spare and use. And it seems like it would be a great endeavor to use it at this very moment. If anything, he has a lot of spite to power up a city's worth of grievances, this could also be a great way to de-stress.
Carefully, Hitoshi folds the paper again, placing it into his uniform's shirt pocket. Sighing, he orients himself and starts walking home, trying his best to take his mind off what just happened by listing down the groceries he needs to get.
(But the thing is, instead of the hope dying from being buried deeply, it grew into a sprout that will just grow out of proportion before he could stop it, and by that time he'll be too tangled to it that he has no choice to concede defeat.)
A/N: Long time no update! I got no excuses other than I stopped reading MHA right before introduction of Ms. Sniper Lady/ Ex-Hero/Assassin. Anyway, I'm not gonna start reading it again any time soon, tho I've seen mighty spoiler all over the internet. Plus, all those don't matter anyway. I'm taking creative liberty as a fanfiction writer, canon might as well be dead in my fingertips hehe.
Lemme know your thoughts and see you again next update!