A Conversation with Sanji part 2
Summary: A few years ago, I wrote about how much I adored Sanji. That hasn't changed, but a few other things have. TW for discussing depression and self-harm.
Disclaimer: I don't own One Piece.
It's been a little over five years since I wrote part one and, up until a few days ago, I had no idea there would be a part two. Life is different in some ways but in others, it's the same. I'm almost a year clean of self-harm. I'm trying to write more. It's important, even if it doesn't pay the bills yet like editing does. Luffy wouldn't want me to give up on my dream. I don't want to.
I'm no longer babysitting, living on an uncomfortable couch with just a duffle bag to live out of during the weekdays. I'm back at my mom's house. I make time for things outside of work. I play DnD once a week with a group of friends that are genuinely happy to see me. I have coffee with my sister and my grandma a few times a week. I try not to be tied to my desk as much. I try to stop working by 7pm. I don't start before 9am.
Three years ago, I discovered a label for someone like me who doesn't have urges to be intimate with the opposite sex. I'm asexual. There are others like me. I'm not nearly as weird as I thought (at least not in that department). Not that it ever really bothered me—I am who I am, but it's nice to know there isn't anything health-related that I have to be concerned about.
You're still my number one, Sanji-kun. I have a feeling you always will be. If I do ever find a partner willing to cuddle with me without going further, he'd still only be the second guy to ever have my heart. It belongs to a blond pirate with the brightest smile in the Grand Line.
Taz Skylar, the actor who plays you in the live action, does an amazing job. I was really worried because you're my favorite and whoever played you had a lot to live up to, but Oda knew what he was doing when he picked Taz. The interviews with the rest of the cast prove that Oda knew what he was doing. I love each of the live-action strawhats. Taz and Mackenyu are especially on point. I wish we had more interviews with them interacting.
Depression still rears its ugly head from time to time. The really bad days—ones where I can't get out of bed—are thankfully few and far between. You and the crew help with that. I listen to One Piece a lot while I work. I'm still not caught up since I save the newer episodes for when I have time to actually watch them, but I'll get there. I heard from my best friend that Gear 5 is amazing. I can't wait.
Today I'm making time to write fanfiction. I'm really enjoying it, playing in a world that I know so well while jamming out to songs I used to listen to in 2006 while I wrote about you. Life isn't easy like it was when I was a kid. Back when my biggest responsibility was updating fics. Now days missing a deadline had bigger consequences. I've only missed one or two at the expense of my sanity.
It's nice to be a kid again for a little while and type away without a care in the world. I miss that. One day, I'll be able to write for a living like I dreamed about since I was twelve.
One day I'll be Queen of the Authors. Thank you for being on the journey with me.
Author's note: Corny, I know. Please feel free to tell me how sappy this sounds lol Thank you for reading!