There Is A Reason

by DragonGoddess629

The moment Emalina Varlen loses her parents when Shiganshina fell, she decides to join the military in order to become strong. There she meets Jean Kirschtein and instantly there's a connection between the two. But one wants to join the Military Police while the other the Survey Corps. How will these two fare if they choose different regiments?

33. Chapter 33

Chapter Thirty-Three

You've Always Had a Family

A/N: It's been a hot minute but I'm back. I've had this written for some time now but could not figure out how to end the damn thing. Please let me know what you think :)

Disclaimer: Attack on Titan does not belong to me, I only own Emalina and any other OCs. The new story picture does not belong to me; I hold no Copyright and found the picture through Google Images.

~ oOo ~

LEVI

Hange and Erwin made their way toward another set of doors where they followed Dhalis Zachary out of the courtroom. Erwin was the first to acknowledge that I wasn't with them, his voice ringing across the slowly emptying courtroom. But my back was turned towards them, my attention focused solely on four members of my new squad. Connie and Sasha walked beside Jean who lovingly held my sister in his arms. Sensing my eyes on his back, Jean turned his head as they were to leave the room. Nodding with a gentle smile, I could put my weary mind at ease, at least for the moment. At least, until I was able to see Emalina when we were all said and done.

I was not wanting to be a part of this next meeting. Erwin and Hange would need to keep me in check because who knew what I was going to do to Nile Dawk?

"Come on, Levi! We're gonna leave you behind!"

Only turning once my comrades and sister had finally left the courtroom did I meet the stare of my friends. Following them through the double doors, I realized we were in a briefing room. Dhalis Zachary took the head chair; Erin, Hange, and myself joined to the right; as Nile took the left while Commander Pyxis sat beside him.

Having been given the stack of documents from Erwin, Dhalis sorted and glanced through them all as we situation ourselves in our seats. Arms crossed, I stared Nile down, my glare evidently disturbed the man as he squirmed under my scrutiny.

Clearing his throat, Dhalis called this meeting to order. Removing his glasses, the man rubbed the bridge of his nose. "Despite everything that has just occurred, it would seem there is still much that needs to be discussed."

"Indeed there is, sir," Erwin noted, his one hand folded neatly upon the table.

Interjecting whatever Dhalis was about to say, I slid my opinion in as it was of the utmost concern. "Forgetting what we will discuss, Dhalis, I need to know…" Placing his glasses back on, the head of the military patiently waited for me to continue. "Is everything you said about my sister true? That she's not guilty of anything that's been placed against her and that she is free to go?"

Instantly nodding, Dhalis was quick to reply. "Yes, I have deemed any and all charges placed against Emalina Varlen to be void. She was never sentenced to death, despite how others may have read my arrest warrant," the man stole a glance at Nile who groaned.

Running a hand down his face, I was surprised the MP Commander had anything left to say, considering he had just stated during the trial. "Oh, come on, Dhalis! Eren Jaeger and Emalina Varlen both need to be locked up! Letting them roam free will just cause more catastrophe!"

Hange, speaking up for the first time, slammed her hand against the table. "You have no right to speak out against the two of them, Nile Dawk! They have both done enough for humanity's sake than you have ever done!"

"Excuse me?!" He inched himself closer to the table. "Did you already forget what has happened to Stohess, my city?! You're little 'Eren Jaeger' fucked up my city and killed over a hundred people!"

Raising his hand to silence his longtime friend, Erwin refolded his hand. "And we have sat down like civilized beings and have explained why that strategy was necessary. Without my Scouts or Eren as his titan, we would not have been able to catch Annie Leonhart, aka, the Female Titan. Without our actions, she would've been able to roam free, to potentially cause more damage to Stohess whenever she pleased."

Knowing he could not go against the same speech Erwin had already given the man, several times, Nile 'tch'd' and glanced away.

Clearing his throat again, Dhalis placed several of the papers given to him before his sight. "We're not here to discuss Eren Jaeger. It seems the problem is Emalina Varlen." About to voice my anger, Dhalis shook his head. "It's no concern of mine," he said gently, staring at the multitude of papers laid out before his sight. "Personally, I have nothing against the girl. And I can only go off of others' testimonies but it sounds like she was caught in a situation where she happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time."

"Unfortunately, that is the case, sir," Erwin replied with a nod.

"My sister has been through enough since Wall Maria fell, and these last two weeks have not helped."

"I can definitely see why. Since requesting her arrest, I've been doing some digging on your sister, Levi." My eyes narrowed in confusion. "She's originally from Uma and you were the one to rescue her, yes, Levi?"

"That is correct," I answered.

"And Commander Erwin…you were the one who said she could live with the Scouts until she joined the Cadet Corps?"

"That is also correct, sir," Erwin nodded.

Sighing heavily, Dhalis looked to the only individual in the room who hadn't said a word yet. "Pyxis…you've worked alongside Emalina, yes?"

"I have sir, yes. I met her on occasion when she was stationed at the Trost HQ while the Scouts were out on an expedition, as she couldn't join them. However, I was given the opportunity to work alongside her during the Trost Invasion."

"Yes, Trost…" Dhalis said slowly, dragging a paper forward from his pile. "She was a rather effective soldier that day, was she not?"

"She was extremely effective that day, sir. When the wall was attacked, she was chosen to be in the Elite Guard and once the evacuation was over, she was one of the few to lead the rookie cadets to HQ so they could have a chance at survival."

Rubbing his neck, Dhalis muttered, "Damn." It was extremely rare to hear the military head curse. "I placed an arrest warrant on such a capable soldier…?"

"Capable soldier my ass!" Nile roared. "She's a goddamn titan, a menace to our society! Why can't any of you idiots see that?!"

Grabbing me by the back of my jacket collar, Erwin had to heave a sigh. "And what do you expect of us, Nile? Should I simply surrender one of my Scouts because she was turned into a titan against her will?"

"If you're the Commander Smith I used to know, then yes, you should!"

Unable to move due to Erwin's hand still holding me back, I growled at the man. I was already pissed off by his antics, he was only increasing the rage I was feeling within.

"If I understand the situation at hand, Emalina's to be an important asset in the expedition to reclaim Wall Maria in two months' time, right?" Pyxis asked after a moment of silence.

Nudging Erwin's hand away, I forced myself to calm down. "Yes, that is true," I answered in lieu of Erwin or Hange. "Not just because she's an extremely capable soldier, but the powers she has discovered through being a titan will be vital if we're to retake Wall Maria."

"I would love to hear more about how she can help. We all know Emalina is a fine and capable soldier, but how is she while in her titan form?" Pyxis asked, his line of sight moving between me, Erwin, Hange, and Dhalis. "She must have a trick that is different from Eren's."

Speaking forward, Hange used her titan expertise to provide the necessary details that were needed. "Eren's titan and Emalina's titan are fairly similar. Their overall strength seems to match along with basic attack prowess. The main difference between them is broken down to the newly acquired powers they have each gained. While captured, Eren came into contact with some form of hardening serum where he was able to will his entire titan body to solidify. Eren can completely harden his best and be able to safely escape. The husk is indestructible and can be used to plug the hole in Wall Maria."

"Which is exactly what we discussed in the meeting last week," Pyxis noted. "And what of Emalina's powers?"

Suddenly interested or not, Nile spoke next. "So, if that's Jaeger's power, what the hell can Varlen do?"

"My sister can create crystal-like objects out of thin air."

"…and that's helpful because…?"

"It's helpful because she can also create barriers that cannot be broken," I firmly stated, remembering just last week as I watched her save Hange's life at the Reiss Estate.

Hange nodded as she seemed to remember being told about the incident as well. "It's true. She is able to solidify objects she wants to create. Such as when we were in Orvud trying to take down the Rod Reiss titan. The large titan was about to slam its hand down upon the top of the wall when she appeared beneath it and out of nowhere created a crystal spear that she used to deflect the titan's attack. It would seem even bullets cannot penetrate through what she can create."

"Bullets? Bullets can't dent it therefore it's indestructible. Can a titan break through it?" Now Dhalis seemed intrigued.

"That's where our next set of experiments comes into play. Since we've been given the go for the next expedition, we plan on using these next few months to hone and perfect Eren and Emalina's abilities. Without them, I believe we will suffer from a high fail rate," Erwin explained.

"So you're placing your hopes and dreams on two people who can turn into titans? Damn, Erwin…I've lost so much faith in you. And you, Captain Levi…you would take such a girl as your sister? Are you nuts?"

I'd had enough.

Reaching across the table, I grasped Nile's collar thrusting his face into mine. The man's eyes grew exceedingly large, most likely in fright.

Good.

Whether the others around me were saying anything or trying to tear us apart, I had no idea. My attention was solely focused on this asshole before me.

"Let's get one thing straight, Nile. I've never been a fan of you or the love you give your precious Military Police. But whatever respect I had for you is all but gone the moment you took your anger out on my sister and I won't continue to sit here and listen to the hatred you have for her."

Nearly choking the man, I could hear him slightly gasping for breath. "You came for my sister in the middle of the night, scaring the shit out of her. You allowed your men to beat her, to starve her, to treat her worse than horseshit. I will never forgive you for what you have done. Just know that you have now officially made an enemy out of me, Nile Dawk." Slamming the man back into his seat, Nile slumped into his chair, seeming defeated by my words. Still standing, I moved to leave the room, not wanting to be around that specific Commander at the moment. Halting, I turned to see Hange had grasped my elbow, keeping me from retreating. Nodding to my own chair, my eyes rolled but I complied.

Eyes switching between me and Nile, Dhalis seemed lost, confused. I couldn't fucking tell, my eyes were still seeing red. Glancing across at Pyxis, my shoulders dropped some of their tension as the man chuckled under his breath, seemingly amused by my antics. Collecting the papers he had set before him, Dhalis compiled them in a nice, neat pile before folding his hands upon the stack.

"Nile," voice commandeering and stoic, the military head stared at the longtime Military Police Commander. "I am in…utter disbelief that you have done what you have allowed your men to do to Emalina. I understand your frustration because we now suddenly have two titan shifters among the Scouts instead of one. Just as Emalina did not foresee this happening to her, none of us can acknowledge this is something that would occur." Removing his glasses, the man rubbed his face for the umpteenth time since entering this briefing room. "Regarding your disobedience, I am sentencing you to two months probation without pay, effective immediately."

The man slammed his hands down upon the table. "You…you can't do that! Disobedience? When have I ever…?!"

Taking the stack of papers, Dhalis surprised us all by standing to his feet, slapping Nile across the head with the documents. "You disobeyed my command when you took matters into your own hands and decided to scare Emalina Varlen! You took my orders and twisted them into your own command, deeming she deserved to be arrested at the most inconvenient of times; you held her prisoner in deplorable conditions that I was not made aware of beforehand; you allowed your men to beat a defenseless young woman; you even threatened her that she was to be executed. I just…" Reclaiming his seat, Dhalis was speechless for a moment. "I am in utter shock at what you have done here, Nile. Emalina Varlen may now be a titan, that much is certain, but she has not done anything against you personally, the government, or our people to deserve the treatment you allowed to befall her. Now, please inform your second-in-command of your punishment. Your wife and child may appreciate having you home for two months time."

Glaring between everyone in the room, Nile stood, giving me one last glare I definitely reciprocated before storming out the door, slamming it shut behind him. A collective sigh escaped from Hange; Pyxis merely shook his head, crossing his arms; I growled; all while Erwin and Dhalis continued on speaking.

"Sir, is that an appropriate punishment for Nile?" Erwin questioned.

"Whether it's appropriate or not, it is what is it. Before she left, I overheard what Emalina requested, that Nile not lose his job over this." Chuckling behind a hand, Dhalis then shook his head. "I have never spoken to the women directly but Emalina sure is something else. She has had these accusations against her with the threat of execution and she requests the person behind this to not be fired. Needless to say, I heeded her request, which is why his probation is without pay. Levi, to you, is this acceptable?"

Though I wish Dhalis had done more, I still nodded. "Yes, it is acceptable. I do wish something more severe had been done but I must commend and respect the wishes of my sister."

At my words, the old man's eyes seemed to soften. "You truly care for the girl, don't you, Levi?"

"Tch," My eyes rolled. Casting my head away so no one could see my reaction, I muttered, "More than I have ever cared for another. She is my sister, after all."

Seeming to understand my discomfort, Pyxis jumped in; he was definitely a man of few words and only spoke when he thought others deserved to hear what he had to say. "I must also commend Emalina. It's extremely humbling that she didn't want anything to happen to Nile. That girl…she has always thought of others over herself. Even in times of such need, to places herself beneath others to make sure they are safe and taken care of."

"We can only speak in the five years time we've known her but Emalina's always been like that," Hange commented.

"I remember talking with Keith Shadis during her time as a cadet and she was the same way then," Erwin said, a slight smirk appearing on his face.

"It was like that when you left her in our care in Trost," Pyxis added. "This is…I just cannot believe everything Emalina has gone through or how she manages it all."

"It's because my sister is strong." Turning my head back around, I didn't face the others, but they could at least now see my face when I spoke. "She draws strength from her friends, those she cares about. It's why she is the way she is."

"Well…I am very fortunate to have met such a wonderful person. Even so, I must…apologize to you, Erwin, and Hange. And…especially to you, Levi." Glancing up at the main, I raised an eyebrow, confused as hell about what he was saying. Holding the stack of papers in his hand, Dhalis glanced down at the wording, seemingly to read what others had written about my sister, about the greatness she had and the type of friend she was. "I did not know she had been turned against her will. On the day of Historia's coronation, after the long meeting he held, a few MP soldiers came and spoke with me privately, explaining how they had been part of the mission to rescue Eren past the walls. They told me everything about Emalina, how she was a titan, and how they were forced to keep the idea a secret."

Rubbing his temple, Dhalis seemed lost in his own words. Almost like he was in disbelief in himself for having to admit he'd done something wrong. "In giving Eren a trial, I had to do the same to Emalina which is why I created the warrant for her arrest. I gave that warrant to Nile that night in the hopes he would enact it and arrest her in the morning. Clearly, he took matters into his own hands, thus why we are where we are."

Taking a moment to take in his words, I was left feeling…satisfied. It was nice hearing Emalina had someone else on her side besides the obvious individuals. Knowing something needed to be said on behalf of my sister, I nodded in Dhalis' direction. "Thank you," I mumbled as politely as I could muster.

He nodded in return. Grabbing all the papers, he nervously settled them in a neat pile on the table. "Well, unless this is more that should be discussed, I believe we are done here. The Scouts will remain here in the Capital for a few days, no?"

"Yes, mainly because there are still meetings we need to hold with the new Queen but also because we want Emalina to receive some rest before traveling," Erwin stated almost as if it was an obvious answer.

"Yes, of course. Levi," Dhalis called for me. Grunting, I lifted my head just a little. "Is there anything else I can help with?"

My head shook. "No, you took care of this matter for my sister and let her go, I am fine with the outcome."

"Good. Well, then I think we're done here, we can conclude this meeting."

As Erwin, Hange, and I all stood, Commander Pyxis stayed behind to speak with Dhalis regarding something I had no clue of. The moment we were all outside the now-closed doors, Hange locked an arm around my shoulders.

"Geez Levi, I thought you were going to clobber ol' Nile there!"

"If I hadn't held him back, we would have done so from the very beginning," Erwin commented.

Hange agreed by saying, "That's true."

Though I was listening, I cared not for what they said. All I wanted was to head back to HQ and see my sister. Granted, I probably wouldn't see her for a few hours, but I wanted to check in on her all the same. Though, before I turned my back, I, as gently as I could muster at the moment, knocked my first against Erwin's shoulder. He stared down at me from his monstrous sight. "I guess a thanks is in order. You're the one who had the testimony idea and I think that's what helped Emalina today."

Erwin merely chuckled. "Well, I wouldn't be doing my job correctly as the Scout Commander if I didn't take care of my soldiers, but you are more than welcome, Levi. Remember, Hange and I also care for Emalina deeply. She's not just another Scouting soldier to us; she's also our friend."

Ruffling my hair, I growled at Hange for doing so. "Yeah! She's so special to us, I'm a little offended you don't think we care about her as much as you." Startled, I started mumbling a reply when Hange cut me off before I could get even one word out. "Levi, I'm not accusing you of anything. She's your family so you're going to care for her differently than Erwin or I would. Now, we know you're itching to go see her so go! We have some different business to attend so we'll be by HQ soon."

Knowing I shouldn't trust my voice, I nodded, quickly turning away and making my exit from the courtroom.

Once the double doors were open, I was met with the late afternoon sun. How long exactly had we been in that stuffy room arguing over something as incredibly stupid as we had? It was too fucking long, judging by the time of day. Seeing some of the stairs by the passing by civilians, I ignored what they were probably thinking and bee-lined straight for the HQ fortress, knowing that's where Emalina would be right now.

I quickly made my way through the city, legs moving faster the moment I saw the castle-like structure in the distance. Several Scouting soldiers greeted me as I passed while I nodded in their direction, wanting no small talk as I was on a mission. Walking through the front entrance, I headed straight to Emalina's room to see if she was there. Knocking several times on the door, no one answered. Opening, I realized she was now there. Knowing she was either here or in the Mess Hall to eat, I quickly made my way down the stairs. Opening the next set of doors, I stopped right in the entryway. Sitting with Jean, Connie, and Sasha was indeed my sister. She was slowly eating what seemed to be soup and some water. Smart on her part to eat something light considering she'd been starved the last few days.

Catching Jean's eyes, the man tilted his head, stating I should head over. Shaking my head, I lifted my hand, trying to tell him I would wait. She was with her friends and I didn't want to take that away from her. Nodding, I closed the doors behind me, deciding that until I could have a proper conversation with my sister, I might as well bury my head in a pile of paperwork. Because of everything that had happened in during the coup, at Orvud, and in the time since, there was a mountain of paperwork that needed to be completed. And even though that's all I worked on - when I wasn't trying to get Emalina out of jail - there was still a mountain of paperwork that needed my attention and my signatures.

Once I entered my office, I took a seat on the desk chair, sighing the moment my arms folded against the wooden table. It had been a long day for me so I could barely imagine what kind of day it had been for my sister. She was so incredibly brave and strong during the trial that it was hard to imagine she was my sister.

Even though I didn't want them to, my thoughts turned to the notebook I had received from Kenny in the last week. Pulling the damn thing from its hiding place, I moved from the desk to my bed, skimming through its pages for what seemed to be the thousandth time. Nothing in these pages ever changed it was all the same information. The same names, the same damn lines, and the same confusion I felt when I saw my name on one page and Emalina's on the other.

Growing agitated, I threw the notebook against the wall across from me, shoving my face in my hands. The stinging behind my eyes was back and I couldn't understand why. I never cried. But I had never wanted to cry as much as I had this past week when Emalina was arrested.

Hell, I didn't even want to cry the night I explained my entire childhood to Jean, but now?

Fuck, was that a…?

Feeling my cheeks, my initial thought was correct. There was, indeed, one tear that had slipped by. Quickly wiping the thing away, I hastily stood, grabbed the notebook, and shoved it back into one of the desk drawers. I didn't want to see it again until I met with Emalina later. Later is when I could confront the damn thing and her. Later is when I would explain what the notebook was, what it held, and who I retrieved it from.

Even if Emalina hadn't been captured, I didn't know if, or when, I would have explained to her the contents of the notebook. Something was haunting about the damn thing that I didn't want to mess with. A part of me didn't want her to know that we were potentially related because…well, what if that piece of information changed everything? What if Emalina decided that she hated me for keeping this a secret? What if she hated me for treating her so coldly when I had returned from the Reiss Estate? My mind kept wondering 'what if, what if, what if'.

While my mind had been having a fucking fit, my eyes were able to adjust to the lack of light. Glancing outside, I could see now that it was sunset. The sun had sunk beneath the horizon but the sky still glowed orange, leaving barely any light for me to see the paperwork I had subconsciously working on. Closing my ink pot and moving the papers out of the way, I decided now was the time. I had to go see my sister, I wanted to see my sister.

As I made my way toward the door, my hand grasped the handle, and I froze. Eyes darting back to the drawer that held the notebook, I was caught between a rock and a hard place. Do I take the damn thing and explain everything to Emalina, with the potentiality that she wanted nothing more to do with me because I kept this a secret from her?

But, my mind wondered again. Even if that was a potential outcome of meeting her, there was also the opposite idea that everything would be fine and Emalina would completely understand the situation.

Thinking back to the night I explained my history to Jean, he was adamant that Emalina should know. This was not just about me but about her as well and, through his words, she had a right to know.

And I knew the fucker was right.

Sighing heavily, I backtracked to my desk, removed the notebook from its hiding place, and stepped outside the room before I could change my mind.

It was now or never.

~ oOo ~

EMALINA

Jean and I exited the shower about fifteen minutes before a knock on my door. Placing my damp hair into a bun, I glanced at Jean, not knowing who would be visiting me; he shrugged his shoulders, not knowing either. The only person I could think of was my brother, as he said he would stop by later today. Also, it could be Connie or Sasha wanting to hang out a bit more before they wanted to go to bed.

Still, the smile that appeared on my face was wide and bright as I realized it was Levi standing outside my door. "Levi! You're actually here!" Falling into his open arms, I wrapped him tightly around the waist, sighing when I felt his grip tighten around me as well.

"I did say I would stop by." Peering over my shoulder as Jean, Levi raised an eyebrow. "I did say that, didn't I?"

"You did, don't worry," my boyfriend replied.

Stepping back, I glanced between my brother and my boyfriend. Was it just me or were they…acting closer than before? Head shaking, I let Levi step inside as I shut the door behind him. Still feeling somewhat weak from earlier, I claimed the seat on my bed, tilting my head to the desk chair for Levi to take a seat. He was most welcome to stay awhile. I would greatly appreciate it.

"Ema…" Levi called out my name. "How're you feeling?"

For Levi, those few words held so much meaning. He was a man of minimal words anyway, but whenever he spoke he truly meant whatever he said. Smiling, I nodded. "I…I still feel a little weak but my belly's full of food and I was able to finally take a shower, so, there's that."

Within a fraction of a second, I could see my brother flinch. I don't know what it was specifically I had said, but I swear I saw that movement. Seeming conflicted with his next words, Levi seemed to force himself when he asked, "Did the MPs…did they do what you said they did?" My smile falling, I nodded once. "Even starve you of food?" I nodded again, the honesty of my truth rattled him as he glanced down at his hands. "I…I can tell. You seem skinnier than before."

"I - wait…really?"

From his leaned position against the wall near the door, Jean nodded in agreement. "You're not the only one to notice it, Levi, I thought so too." Catching my eye, he added, "It's not that much, but it's enough to be a noticeable difference."

Peering down at my hands, I would just have to believe the two of them. Too much has happened to me this last week for me to notice anything other than what I had experienced. Swallowing the apprehension clawing up my throat, I fought through the sudden pain. "They did a lot to me, not just deprive me of food."

Sitting straighter, Levi tried reaching a hand forward but dropped it in his lap at the last second. "Emalina…."

My eyes were still on my hands, a drop of water fell upon my skin when I realized my vision had grown blurry. I could hear the whisper of my name fall from Jean's and Levi's lips though I didn't acknowledge. All I could feel, all I could see was the hatred in the eyes of those MPs. Their hands held me down as another repeatedly punched and kicked me. The way they threw freezing water on my sleeping body. The spit they flung at my face, their fists colliding with my skin, and most recently this afternoon with my broken nose.

Although I was 'safe' within that dungeon cell, I did not feel safe. Nothing about the situation screamed a prisoner such as myself should experience.

The moment I felt a hand on my shoulder was when I broke.

Head falling into my hands, rocked sobs shook my body, pulling deep heaves of breath from my inner depths. The tears fell upon my skin and it still took another minute to realize I wasn't just crying, I was bawling, openly weeping in front of these men - my brother and boyfriend.

Speaking of, one walked beside me, placing an arm over my shoulder as the other leaned forward, pulling my hand into theirs. Tears and most likely snot were running down my face. All that had happened these past five days pummeled into my heart, fighting my desire to not feel like a victim while the others thought I deserved to be.

And it wasn't necessarily what the MPs had done to me. I easily survived that. But it was the loneliness I experienced for five consecutive days. I held on to hope that my friends, the Scouts, Jean - someone - would come for me. And the longer the five days lasted, the more hope dissipated in thinking they weren't coming. Yet, the moment I walked into the courtroom this afternoon and saw my friends - Connie, Sasha, Armin, Historia, Mikasa, Eren, Hange, Moblit, Erwin, Levi, and Jean was more than enough to reinstall the hope I had lost.

So…why the fuck was I still crying?

I quietly voiced my question, only for Jean to squeeze his hand on my shoulder and for Levi to pull me toward the edge of the bed where our legs were touching. Reaching a hand forward, Levi cupped my face, tilting my chin upward until our eyes met.

"Emalina…for all the shit you've been through, this last week alone, is enough to grant you a reason to cry. You deserve to cry."

Gulping, I halted a sob from escaping. Breathing deeply to try and calm my nerves, I blinked away any remaining tears. With the hand that was holding my cheek, Levi rubbed this thumb across the skin, clearing any leftover tears.

"You have the right to express your pain. You know that, yes, Emalina?"

I could comprehend enough to nod in understanding.

"Much has happened to you in the two weeks since obtaining your titan powers. Have you taken the time to process what this means?"

"N-Not…not as much a-as I sh-should have. I can…handle the titan side of me, I've a-accepted that. What I c-can't accept…" Hiccuping, I covered my mouth, my shortness of breath evident as I gasped several times to steady my breathing. "I can't accept the pure hatred the MPs cast upon me. I saw and f-felt their wrath, I suffered the pain they cast upon me." Knowing my tears were drying, I rubbed my eyes with the palms of my hands. Digging them deep into my sockets, I could still feel the tears wanting to fall.

But I was tired of being the victim.

I would not become the victim and I would not remain the victim.

Removing their hands, I quickly stood. "Just…give me a moment." Stepping into the bathroom, I found my eyes in the mirror, seeing the redness on the outer rim of my eyes and the redness of my nose. Lowering myself closer to the sink, I splashed my face with cold water, the effects against my heated skin were welcomed. Repeating the process three more times, I gently patted my cheeks before leaving the bathroom, finding the way Jean and Levi were staring at each other to be quite interesting.

Hearing my footsteps, Levi turned, standing to meet me halfway as he fully engulfed me in his arms. Shocked for a moment, I took a second to think of all the times Levi had hugged me in front of others like this. There have been times he has hugged me, yes, but like this? When has he done so around others with such veracity? It didn't matter because this was my brother. I'd had the last few hours to be with Jean, Connie, and Sasha to be thankful they were still in my life and I in theirs. I had yet to process that I was still here with my brother.

Dropping my head to the crook of Levi's neck, my arms circled his waist, pulling the man in closer. Inhaling deeply, I could feel more tears prick the corners of my eyes. Several fell but I didn't want to cry anymore. My voice was weak as I slowly mumbled, "Levi, I…just like Jean…I never thought I'd see you again…"

Levi's immediate response was to hold me tighter and I wholly welcomed it. "…I thought so too," he admitted. "These last five days, I thought…I thought the last image I'd have of you would be you bloodied and scared the night of your arrest." Pulling himself away, Levi cupped my cheeks again, thumbs sweeping across the skin as more tears fell. Seriously, what the hell was going on with me and crying within the last twenty minutes? Adam's apple bobbing, Levi's eyes stared into mine as they moved back and forth. "Emalina…" he started. "There's…there's something I need to tell you."

From behind my brother, I could see Jean straightened. "Oh, are you…? Then, would you like me to leave, Levi?"

My brother shook his head. "No, I want you to stay, we already talked. I want you here for Emalina."

Rubbing my eyes, my gaze switched between the two of them. Sniffling, I said, "Ok, what's going on between you two?"

Blinking, Jean seemed confused, especially when he said, "What're you talking about?"

I wagged my finger between them. "You two," I said. "You're acting more…buddy-buddy and it's kinda throwing me off."

Sighing, Levi grabbed my hand and led me to the bed, having me reclaim my seat. Sitting before me in his chair, he still held my hands. "Ema…the night you were arrested, Jean and I had a long, hard talk about something very important, something I've been keeping from you."

"Something you've been keeping from me…? Jean?" Staring up at the man, my eyes were wide as numerous questions filtered through my mind. Why was Levi keeping something from me and why did Jean know about it?

Grasping my shoulder, Jean, surprisingly, smiled. "Trust me, Ema, you'll want to hear Levi out."

"But…why do you know…? Levi?" Turning my widened eyes to my brother, I was surprised to see that the man appeared sacred. My brother never displayed any sign of fear, but there was something in his eyes that was…screaming. "Do you…have a good reason for keeping this from me?"

"No," Jean was quick to reply in place of my brother. "He does not."

"Jean!" I cried. "…that's mean."

"No, no, Emalina…though he's being dumb, Jean's right." Levi cast his eyes downward, furthering his original statement by adding. "I don't even have a shit excuse to give you other than that I just…wasn't ready to tell you."

Tilting my head, I was even more worried. Keeping quiet, I gave this time for Levi to separate his thoughts, to think of whatever it was he needed to say. To my side, Jean moved off to stand against the wall, crossing his arms. I'd much rather have him by my side. Maybe this was his way of giving Levi and me our space while still being in the same room. I couldn't tell.

The sound of fabric moving caught my ears. Glancing at my brother, I could see him remove a tattered, old journal from the inside of his jacket. He fiddled with the cover before raising his eyes to seek mine.

"Before I show you what's in this journal, there's a short story I need to tell you. It has to do with me having gone back to the Reiss Estate last week," Levi said.

Sparing a glance at Jean who nodded, I swallowed, nodding my head up and down. "Ok. So…what is it you need to tell me first?" Taking a deep breath, Levi still fiddled with that damn journal. What was so special about it?

"Myself and the team I was tasked to oversee traveled back to the Reiss Estate where we were ordered to search for anything conspicuous on the property. Though, we were mainly tasked with searching for any potential survivors."

"Survivors?" I questioned. "Did Erwin honestly believe there were survivors? Because there's no fucking way anyone could've survived that."

"Erwin didn't want to risk anything. Besides…out of all the time we were there, we found one survivor."

Exhaling, I moved to sit my back against the wall, curling my legs into my chest. "No shit. Someone actually lived through that death trap?" Levi nodded. "Ok, so, who was it?"

My brother eyes me for several seconds. "…it was Kenny."

My head tilted as an immediate thought entered my head. "Kenny, as in…the captain of the Anti-Personnel Squad? The man who tried to kill you? The same man who raised you after your mom died? Oh!" My hand instantly covered my mouth as I accidentally spoke of something from Levi's past. "Levi, I-I'm so sorry! I didn't mean…!"

My brother didn't seem fazed as he waved his hand in the air. He noticed my eyes had flickered across to Jean. "Don't worry about him, it's ok. Jean knows everything."

"He knows…everything? By everything, do you mean everything you've told me?"

He nodded. "I've kept no secrets from you about my past, Ema. For Jean to understand the situation at hand, I told him everything. He now knows what you do."

Instantly protective of my precious brother, I quickly turned to Jean. "And you'll keep this a secret from the others?"

The man immediately nodded, knowing my sudden change in tact and why I had asked such a question. "I promised Levi and I'll promise you, Ema. It's not my past to share. I won't speak on any of this to anyone else."

Gaze softening, I smiled briefly. There was no reason to have asked Jean in the first place. He wouldn't say anything though I still had to ask.

Nodding in Jean's direction, Levi redirected his attention back to me. "This is why Jean and I may seem different around each other. We've come to an understanding as I've now got nothing to hide from him."

"Damn," I said, not quite sure what to say. "Ok…Jean knows about your past meaning he knows all of what Kenny taught you, yes?"

"That's correct."

"Ok…just making sure I understand. Then what of Kenny?"

"All you need to know of Kenny is that he's dead…he died about twenty minutes after I found him."

"He…he died?" Levi didn't say anything to that, but he didn't need to. I could see it all over his face. "I…I'm sorry, Levi…I know he left when you were younger but he…he still raised you."

"Yeah, I know…I've had much time to think about it this past week and what's happened has happened. But, before he died, he decided to mention something fairly interesting."

Wait…that wasn't what he was keeping from me? Geez, what the hell was this big secret then? "And…what would that be…?"

"Apparently…he's been my uncle this whole time."

I needed a moment to process this.

Kenny, the man who had raised my brother, had been his uncle the entire fucking time?

Scooting to the edge of the bed, I dragged Levi into a hug. To my surprise, he wrapped his arms around me, clenching my shirt tightly in his hands. "Oh, Levi…" Pulling back, it was now my turn to cup his cheeks, my thumbs rubbing against his beautifully sculpted cheekbones. "I…I don't know if this is the appropriate thing to say but…please don't grieve over that man. He…yes, he helped to raise you after your mom passed…but he left you! You may have had the skills to survive on your own but that's no excuse for him to up and leave you like that."

Taking hold of my hand, a small, gentle smile graced my brother's face. "Don't fret. It's more shocking than anything else. But what's more important is this…" Nudging me back gently, Levi turned to the journal in his hand. Opening it up, he turned to the back, eyes seemingly staring at the contents of the page. Handing it to me, he said, "I want you to look at this first, then I'll tell you what's going on."

Blinking, I moved my glance to the journal to find nothing but names and lines. Searching through them all, I was able to quickly find Levi's name. Connected by a vertical line, his mother's name Kuchel rested above his. But then, with a horizontal line connected to her name lay Kenny's.

"I know what this is," I stated, staring at the list of names upon names. "My dad once showed me one my grandma made for his side of the family."

Eyebrows raised, Levi asked, "And you know what the lines mean?"

"I do. See this one that connects you to your mother? That tells anyone looking at this that you are Kuchel's child, her son. And this horizontal line that connects your mom and Kenny? That tells me they're siblings." Rubbing my fingers across Levi's name, I added, "Just going off of this alone, it would seem Kenny was right that he's your uncle."

Levi fell silent for a moment. His eyes hovered over the journal in my lap, looking for something. Sparring a glance at Jean had me realize he was staring at Levi. "Emalina," he called my name. "What else on that page do you see?"

"There's more?"

Levi nodded.

Huffing because I was growing antsy, I wanted to know what Levi had been keeping from me. Having just learned my brother had explained his entire past and history to Jean left me feeling weird on the inside. Still, what about this stupid journal was so important that -

Wait.

Fingering the page, I moved to the opposite side of Kenny's name. Having glanced all over the rest of the page hadn't yielded anything important. Until I saw a flash of the name "Serena".

My mother's name.

Except, the name in this book was listed as "Serena Ackerman". Inhaling deeply, I once again ran my finger across the line to the opposite name. "Miles Varlen". That's…that's my dad! Tearing my eyes away to follow the remaining lines upward, I found a list of names that belonged to my entire family.

Aunt Mary.

Uncle Matthew.

Uncle Samuel.

My cousin Serah.

Grandpa Alexander and Grandma Agnes.

The family that I knew was right here. Granted, it was family all on my dad's side, but they were people I recognized nonetheless. Gulping, my heart, and my head were starting to make the connection. Is this what Levi wanted to show me? Is this what he had been hiding? Knowing it was now or never, I followed the lines back down to my parents, finally acknowledging there was a downward line connected between them. The name?

Emalina Varlen.

Eyes wide as saucers, I dropped the book from my hands, one covering my mouth as a gasp escaped past my lips. It was my name. My name was right there! Tears were prickling the corners of my eyes again. Could this be what I thought this was saying? Was it a fact that Levi and I were…cousins? Were we actually family?

Holy fucking shit…that meant I had some family still alive.

Eyes widening even further, I picked up the journal once again, my finger hovering over the names of my family that I knew before skimming over Kenny's and Kuchel's names, my supposed aunt and uncle if I were to go off of this piece of information.

"Hey mom, you know how dad has lots of brothers and sisters? What about you? Were you an only child?"

Seeing my younger self sitting before me, I was transported back in time. Before me sat my younger self, probably nine or ten years old.

I remember this memory as if it were just yesterday.

"Oh my, Emalina, what would have you ask such a sudden question like that?"

"It's just…you don't talk about your family and I've never met them so…I was curious."

I remember my mom sharing a look with my dad who nodded.

"You're such an inquisitive girl, Emalina. Never lose that about yourself."

"Mom…you're changing the subject."

I remember her sighing before she took to seat next to me at the table.

"Emalina…I'll answer your question, but I want you to know that…it's not a happy one."

"Umm, ok?"

"Just as you said, your dad has lots of brothers and sisters, right? And would you say they all get along?"

"I…I think so…"

I remember my mother smoothing my hair.

"Well, I have two older siblings, a brother and a sister."

"Oh, oh really? Can I meet them?! What're their names?"

"My brother is Kenny and my sister is Kuchel. But, I'm sorry Emalina, I…I have no idea where they could be."

"What do you mean? How do you not know where your siblings are?"

I remember my mom and dad laughing at that. My mom continued to play with my hair as she spoke with a sadness in her voice I didn't recognize at the time.

"My siblings…we kind of had a falling out. My brother didn't like your dad very much and then one day he was just gone. And my sister, well…I honestly don't know how she's doing. Last I heard she moved to the Underground City, but we lost contact long before I married your father."

"And you haven't seen either of them?"

I remember my mom looking so incredibly sad.

"Your Uncle Kenny paid us a random visit when you were real small, too little to remember. He didn't say anything about our sister other than she had a son. So, somewhere out there, you have another cousin."

"Did Uncle Kenny tell you his name?"

"I think he said the boy's name was…Levi? Well, not so much a boy considering he's about ten years older than you."

"Mom? Do you think I'll ever get to meet Levi someday?"

"This is a small world, so you just might, my little Rosie, you just might."

"Emalina!"

Eyes blinking rapidly, I glanced around at my surroundings, surprised to find myself sitting in my room, Levi across from me while Jean had appeared at my side. The memory had felt so real, I swore I was sitting at our family table talking to my mom. It was…holy shit I can't even believe I remember that specific memory. It had randomly happened one day. I don't think my parents expected such a conversation to pop up because, after that, we never spoke of my mom's family ever again. And because we never spoke of my mother's family again, the memory fell into the deep recesses of my mentality. I had completely forgotten we had had such a conversation, up until I saw the connection between Levi's family and my own. That one line connecting my mother to Kenny told me everything I needed to know.

Levi and I were just claiming each other as a family because we felt a deep connection with one another. From the moment he rescued me, I had loved Levi like family, and all this time it's because he was my family.

When the journal once again slipped through my fingers, my head dropped into my hands, and my sobs instantly escaped past my lips as I openly cried. I cried for the pain I had felt these past five years in thinking I was all alone. I cried for the pain Levi had experienced as he had also felt that he had no family either. But also, I cried because I wanted to run away, just as I had always done when overcome with intense emotions of feeling scared and alone. But here, sitting by my side and before me, were my loving boyfriend and brother. And somewhere within HQ were Sasha and Connie, Moblit and Hange, and even Erwin. I haven't been alone since my parent's death and if this journal was to represent anything this night, it's the fact that I would never, ever be alone anymore.

"…Emalina?"

Hearing the sound of my boyfriend and my brother at the same time, I gulped large amounts of air into my lungs, knowing I needed to try and calm down without being able to do so. Beside me, the mattress sunk on my sides as Jean took my right and Levi took my left. Jean ran his fingers up and down the length of my spine as Levi took hold of my hand, linking our fingers together as he dropped a kiss on my temple.

"We're right here, Ema," Jean said gently.

"We've got you, shorty," Levi stated with so much raw emotion.

I tried slowing my breathing. Here and there I would gulp down large amounts of air, my lips parting as I hiccuped from the amount of sobbing I had done. Here, at my side, was my family, and I loved them so incredibly much. Forever would Jean and Levi remain at my side where I would never, ever be alone again. Though it had taken me some time during training to admit I wasn't alone, here in this moment could I say that I, for sure, was not alone.

Glancing at Levi, I accepted the handkerchief he was offering me. Slowly taking the material into my hand, I quickly wiped the remaining tears from my face, feeling the swelling behind my eyes, knowing full well they were red and blotchy. Cleaning my nose, I then set the cloth onto my lap, my eyes peering at the list of names on the journal's open page before me.

"…I knew who you were before we met, Levi," I found myself speaking without realizing it.

Head tilting, Levi responded, "What are you talking about?"

"I…" Taking hold of his handkerchief again, I could feel the tears fall once more. "Before Wall Maria fell, probably three or four years before the titans appeared, I had a conversation with my mom and dad." Turning my head to face him, his eyes were neutral but I could see the curiosity beneath his stoic facade. "Looking at the journal reminded me of that conversation." Pointing at the specific page I was referencing, I said, "See these names on this side? This was my dad's entire family, all his brothers and sisters, and his parents. Growing up, I knew all the family my dad had, but…I never knew anything about my mother."

Taking a deep breath, I continued. "As far as I knew, my mother had no other family besides me and my dad. She never mentioned anything, but one day, I asked her about it. She admitted to me that she had one brother and one sister though she hadn't seen them since before I was born. She even told me their names - Kenny and Kuchel. She…" Running my finger down the page of the journal, I stopped at the space between Levi's and my name, my eyes glancing back and forth between how close they were.

"She couldn't tell me the whereabouts of my Uncle Kenny, but she knew that my Aunt Kuchel was probably still living in the Underground City." From my peripheral, I could see Levi stiffen, the puzzle pieces connecting in his mind. "Apparently, Kenny wasn't a fan of my dad, my mom stated that was one of the reasons why she never saw him again. But, he supposedly visited sometime after I was born to tell my mom how her sister was doing. I guess it was during this time that she had a nephew named Levi…" Closing the journal, I tossed it onto the chair before me as I turned my entire body, clasping Levi's hands within my own.

"Please understand, Levi…this isn't something I've tried to hide from you. I completely forgot about that conversation until just now when you showed me this journal! I-I never made the connection with your name being the same 'Levi' my mom was telling me about all these years ago! So, please, I didn't know - oomph!"

Pulling me into his chest, Levi hugged me as tightly as he could. The man crushed me as I held him back. My arms cinched around his waist; he needed to know that I loved him. But there was still something I needed to say so I retracted from his arms, cupped his cheeks, and pulled the man closer.

"Listen to me…I think - I think this journal is more than a coincidence, which means we are legitimately cousins. But…all these years I've been calling you my brother and you've been calling me your sister. Is it possible…" Feeling the stupid waterworks once more, I allowed the fucking tears to fall. If I was going to keep crying then I would do so with my eyes open and my head held high. Doing just that, I lifted my head to face Levi head-on. "Please…I don't want this to change how we see each other. If we are in fact cousins, can we still keep calling each other brother and sister…?"

Levi quickly nodded. Taking the cloth from my lap, he brought the soft material up to my face, clearing my eyes and cheeks of fresh tears. "Shorty, I…I don't want to change anything either. You have been my loving, younger sister since day one. It's just as you said, even if this fucking journal states we are family, I'd rather have you as my sister than my cousin.

A large bright smile formed on my face.

"If anything must be said, I'm…." Levi glanced away. "I'm sorry for not saying anything in the first place."

"No, Levi, no," I waved him off. I sniffed again, taking Levi's cloth and rubbing it underneath my eyes. For sure they were going to be puffy and swollen come morning. "There's absolutely nothing to apologize for. I mean, I am upset don't get me wrong, but not with you, never with you, Levi. This situation is…shit, I don't even know how to describe it, but none of it is your doing. You've been dealing with this on your own since my arrest, which by all means didn't help either." Taking his hand in mine, I stared into his beautiful blue-grey eyes. "None of that matters because I'm still your sister and you're still my brother."

Levi sighed, all the tension that was stored in his shoulders seemed to melt away. Tilting his head down, Levi muttered, "Thank you." Feeling braver, Levi raised his head, leaving me the sight of reddened cheeks. Levi was embarrassed and I think it's because Jean was there, but he was becoming more open. "Thank you," he said again, louder.

Standing, I placed the cloth in his lap and then encased the man in my arms. Wrapping them around his neck, I pulled the man against my chest, wanting Levi to feel that he was loved, just as much as he made me feel. "It is I who should thank you for telling me the truth."

Removing my arms, Levin stood, nodding in Jean's direction who nodded back. Turning to me, he gave me a small, Levi-ish smile. Rubbing his hand against the top of my still-damp hair, he said, "You've been through enough today, you should get some sleep. You've had enough new information thrown at you in the last few hours."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes shorty, you need your rest. We'll be staying here for the next few days to handle things with our new Queen but he'll want to be on the move soon. In the meantime, you need to rest." Tilting his head at my boyfriend, he added, "Make sure she doesn't do anything too strenuous."

"You got it," Jean replied. "She'll be good as new by the time we head out."

Levi hummed with approval. Stepping closer, he kissed my forehead. "Get some sleep. We can talk more in the morning over breakfast. Sound good?"

"Yeah, I'm ok with that."

Humming once more, Levi took his leave. Closing the door behind him, my shoulders slumped. I'd barely had any time with my brother - cousin? I was still confused on that part - but I understood what Levi was talking about. Now that he had left, the adrenaline from earlier was dissipating, my body slumping into itself, ready for a nice long sleep.

Sensing my sudden change, Jean walked forward as he wrapped an arm around my shoulder, leading me toward the bed. "Alright, you…time to sleep."

Peering upward, I meekly asked, "You're not going anywhere, right?"

"Never. Unless someone calls, you're stuck with me until morning."

"Just the way I like it," I snickered. Jean did the same as he kissed the top of my head.

Slipping underneath the covers first, Jean blew out the candle and then crawled in beside me. Wrapping ourselves in the warm blanket, we faced each other, both smiling. Mine fell after several moments, my mind wondering about the events of the day, still in denial of everything that had occurred. Sensing the distance in my eyes, Jean placed a palm against my cheek.

"What's going on through that head of yours?"

"Everything and nothing at the same time. I just keep thinking about the last few days and all that I learned today. I still can't believe I was arrested, led to believe I was going to be executed, and then told I've been free of all the crimes pressed against me. I just…I wonder what they all talked about after we left the courthouse."

Stroking my cheek, Jean offered, "It's probably best you don't know. I mean, sure, they were probably talking about you and what has happened but…why dwell on it? You're here, you're safe, and with me and our friends. Plus, you learned something important about you and Levi." He smiled. "I'd say that beats wondering about what happened after you left."

"Heh, yeah you're right, as usual. I just, can't believe it. I still have some family left!"

"That was my first thought when Levi told me too. But, Ema, you've always had family around you. We may not be blood-related, but you've had a family this entire time."

Smiling even more, I kissed the man's palm. "I have, haven't I? Well, now it just keeps growing."

"That it does." Dropping another kiss, this time against my lips, he added, "Now sleep, you deserve it."

Giggling softly, I scooted my body closer to Jean's feeling the warmth of his arms encompass my entire being. Settling against the pillow and the crook of his neck, my eyes fell shut and I was out within a matter of seconds.

~ oOo ~

It might be some time, but check back to see what and when I post next :) It would be for this story, it could be something different, who knows!

DragonGoddess629