Chapter 11: Change
Zuko wasn't too sure what to expect when they returned to the palace but—
"Zuzu! You're okay!" Kiyi shouted as she rushed to hug him, with his mother and Noren in tow.
"H-Hey! Yeah, we're back." He tried to not let Kiyi's use of Azula's nickname get to him. It did manage to sound nicer coming from her, so it wasn't as difficult as he thought.
"Aang! Azula!" She then ran to the two other people behind him. "And—" She started as she noticed the rest of their team, causing her to hide behind Azula's leg instead. It had been a while since they've all been together in one place at the same time… all except Toph.
Now that he thought about it, it had been more than a year since he'd seen her… Maybe he should be the one to pay her a visit instead.
He then took a look at his mother, who was smiling. But something was off about her…
"Mom? Is everything alright?" He decided to ask.
"O-Oh yes, don't worry! I'm just tired from all the excitement…"
Well, she did look tired… But he had a feeling it was something else.
"Were you shown to your old room?" Maybe the memories got to her after being thrown back into the palace so suddenly.
But she shook her head. "No, I asked to be given a guest room… In any case, I'm glad to see you two are okay, but I think it'd be best if I went ahead and retired for the day. We'll get to see each other again tomorrow, after all."
And with a final smile, she turned around and went back to her room.
"Don't worry about her." Noren spoke up as she disappeared into on of the hallways. "She just needs some time to get used to the place again. I don't know exactly how her life was back here, but I'm sure she'll manage to get through it."
"He's right, nephew—" His uncle joined in. "Time heals all wounds after all. And as long as were here to support her, I'm sure everything will turn out all right in the end."
"Right…"
Even if he wanted nothing but to ease her troubles… he wasn't sure if there was anything he could do for that.
And he also had the New Ozai society to worry about.
He had to do something about that, and quickly, before things escalate beyond just them trying to kill him, and put his father back on the throne…
He sighed internally. It was one thing after the other ever since he became Fire Lord.
"You're pretty!" He heard Kiyi's voice near the entrance. "Isn't she, Zuzu?"
He turned around.
Surrounding Kiyi were all of his friends… which included Suki and Katara. He didn't catch who she was talking to, but he'll take a guess.
It's not like his answer would change either way.
"Yeah, you're right." He replied simply.
He tried not to focus on any of them, but his eyes met with Suki's for a split second. And he's sure she noticed it too.
"See, he agrees!" She jumped to grab Katara's hand.
"T-Thanks…" Katara smiled awkwardly.
"So, Zuko! Who's the little girl anyway?" Sokka popped his head from behind Katara. "She looks and awful lot like you… Don't tell me she's your— Ow!" He recoiled in pain as Katara hit him in the head.
"Don't go saying stupid things, Sokka! A-Azula already told us she's their little sister!"
"Hey I'm sorry if I'd rather not listen to what she has to say! We still don't know if Aang is under her control or not!"
"Sokka! I told you it's not like that!" Aang protested. "She's on our side now!"
"Either way, I'm not letting her out of me or my boomerangs sight!" Sokka said as he pulled out said boomerang.
Now that he thought about it, he hasn't crafted a new sword ever since the day of the comet. It'd be nice to spar with him once in a while, considering there aren't many people in the palace who know how to wield a sword.
"Sokka—" Aang began protesting again, but Azula put a hand on his chest.
"Let him. I'd like to see him try and use that boomerang on me."
She stared at Sokka with a weirdly nostalgic glare, which only prompted him to ready his boomerang above his head.
"Don't underestimate the power of my boomerang— Ow!" Azula shocked his boomerang out of his hand with a small spark of lightning.
Which only got her a frozen hand in return.
"Hey! Don't touch him!" Katara shouted angrily.
"Then tell him to not swing his stupid toy on my face!"
Both girls were glaring at each other. He almost made a step between them but something else caught everyone's attention.
Aang was laughing.
"What's so funny?" Azula asked with a raised eyebrow.
"Sorry!" He got out mid laughter. "It's just—You guys are getting along now!"
Now Katara raised an eyebrow herself.
Then she shared an unamused look with Azula, before shrugging and walking deeper into the palace.
"I think I'll go back to my room now." She then turned for a second to look at Aang. "Hey, Aang? Can we… have a talk tomorrow morning? About… well, you know."
Aang looked surprised by her request, but quickly smiled and nodded.
"Thanks." Katara responded before making her way through the hallway leading to the guest rooms.
An awkward silence overtook them.
"I think we all should call it a day and get some rest." Suki decided to speak out. "It's been too crazy of a day. We can all catch up tomorrow, okay?"
"You're right—" Sokka said with a yawn. "We can… talk tomorrow… I'll see you guys later!" He then hastily made his way to his room.
"What was that about?" Kiyi asked as Sokka sprinted down the hall.
"Beats me…" He responded.
He'd figured Sokka would've liked to spend some time with Suki after so much time apart…
He began feeling something bubbling in his chest. He wasn't sure how to interpret it, but it almost felt like—
"Zuko?"
"H-Huh?" He stumbled out.
"You were kinda spacing out for a second there… Is everything okay?" Suki's concern seeped through her voice. And with his head all jumbled in a mess, he wasn't sure if he was imagining it or not.
Was he actually okay?
No, he definitely wasn't.
"I-I think I'll also retire back to my room now! I'll see you guys in the morning!" His voice was squeaky and nervous, but he couldn't do anything about it but turn around and run back to where the guests rooms where.
He figured tackling this problem right at the source would be the best course of action.
He just hoped Sokka wouldn't try and punch him for it.
"W-Wait, Zuko?!" Suki tried to call out, but he was gone almost as fast as he said he was going back to his room.
Even if the Fire Lord's chambers weren't through that side of the palace…
"Why is everyone acting so weird?" Kiyi's smaller voice was heard from next to them. "Where those Ozai Society guys that awful?"
Azula laughed. "Well, considering they didn't even need my help… I'd say they were nothing but some pushovers. Although, we're going to have to be careful that they don't come back again. Which is why, I'm going to need you to go back with mom."
"But I wanted to explore the palace some more!" Kiyi protested, but Azula's face left no room for argument. "Fine…" She finally relented with a drop of her head. She then sulkily started pacing her way through the same hallway everybody ran through a few moments ago.
"Shouldn't we have time for a little exploring?" Aang decided to ask. "It really isn't that late, you know…"
"Maybe not." Azula said sharply. "But we need to talk about what just happened back in that forest."
Well, that made sense… "But I still feel bad for Kiyi…"
"Then you and her can go explore all you want tomorrow!" She replied, clearly annoyed. "But we need to figure out who those pathetic excuses for bandits really are… And I think I know who to go to."
"Wait, you do?" Suki voiced her confusion. "They all had their faces covered, and the ones we captured haven't budged even a little bit… For them to be rallying this much loyalty only tells me that they have something big coming."
But Azula remained unfazed. "Whatever that may be, it doesn't matter. If they dare attack the royal family, then they'll be faced with our full might. Even if it's for my idiot brother."
It might've been his imagination, but the way she said those words sound almost… fonder than he's ever heard from her.
Maybe this was what that scholar meant about family…
"So who is this person you want us to go to?" Suki's voice still sounded somewhat skeptical.
Azula then smirked. "Just an old friend… Although I'm not sure if she'll be that happy to see me."
An old friend? It felt a little mean to think about it but… that pretty much narrowed it down to two people. And one of them was here in the palace with them so…
"You think Mai knows something then."
"Well… I happened to see her talking to one of the members while I was flying on Appa. And if she knows one of them, then it's someone I probably know as well."
"Who do you think they are?" Suki couldn't hide the anticipation of her voice.
"Well, it's not like we got proof or anything so I'll tell you guys later. In any case, since you guys have had Ty Lee ever since the war ended, I'm going to assume you know where she's living these days."
"I do but… I don't know if it's the best idea to just barge in unannounced. Especially if you're with us… I don't think Mai's mother would be too happy about that."
But Azula just shrugged. "Then you two go on your own, and tell Mai to meet us somewhere else. The house the Kyoshi Warriors have been staying should be good enough."
"I don't know… Wouldn't this practically be an ambush? I don't know if Mai would appreciate that…" He voiced his concerns.
He'd rather do this without having to deceive anyone. Especially now that everyone was on the same side.
"Then tell her I'll be there and see how fast she refuses until you're forced to actually drag her!" She sounded close to bursting. "She's our only lead in all of this…"
He could see her point if he was being honest. And it may just be their only chance to find out more about the Society…
Was that really their only choice?
"What about Kei lo?" The idea came to him all of a sudden. He had to have been the one who warned them of the attack. Even if it ended being a trap, he still fought with them.
But both girls just looked at him confused.
"…Who's that?" Suki asked.
"Oh! Right!" He forgot he's the only one that actually met him outside Zuko. "He's the one who gave us the lead on the attack!"
"You mean the one that led us into an ambush?" Azula asked unamused.
"No—I mean—Yes, he did, but he helped us too! I'm sure he's on our side!"
"Oh, you mean the guy that helped Zuko out of his restraints!" Suki suddenly came to the realization. "Ty Lee had said something about him being Mai's boyfriend. Although she made it sound like she was just using him to get info on the society…"
Azula laughed. "That does sound like her. But unless we know where this Kei Lo lives, then we have no choice other than going to Mai." She said with finality.
He sighed. He should've guessed Azula's plan to be the best one.
"Fine… We'll talk to Mai then. But I'm not going to lie to her."
Azula glared at him sharply.
Which he now knew to stand his ground.
"Um… guys? What are you doing?" Suki asked after their staring match went on for a bit longer than one could consider normal.
"He thinks he can beat me at my own game." Azula said simply.
"Okay…?" Suki said with a shake of her head. "For what it's worth, I also don't think we have to lie to Mai to get her to come. If we're honest with her, then she'll probably realize that we're trying to help."
Azula side eyed her with equal fire. Until she seemed to have gotten an idea.
"Well… if you guys won't listen to me, then I won't listen to you guys either."
"What's that supposed to mean?" Suki asked puzzledly.
"I'm going."
And as soon as she said those words, she began walking out of the palace.
"Wait! You don't even know where she lives!" Suki protested but Azula didn't budge. She just kept on walking, laughing arrogantly at something.
And he had an idea of what that something was.
He sighed. "I think she does…"
"What?! But how—"
"Well, she must've picked up something from what you said. Maybe the thing about her mom?"
"But why would that—" Suki began saying but realized something before she could finish. "Does she know that Mai's parents split up?"
They did? Well, that was definitely news to him.
"I don't know. Does it matter?" He decided to ask.
"Well, they're living with Mai's grandmother right now…"
He nodded. "And Azula probably knows where that is…"
Hearing his words, Suki let out a frustrated groan. "We have to go after her! Mai's mother will definitely freak out if she sees Azula!"
And that definitely would be bad…
Or is it?
It's not like Azula isn't aware of what her showing up will cause… If anything, she's probably the one that knows it the most.
And even if she doesn't like to admit it, he can tell that she's trying to regain as much control of her life as she can. To regain some sense of normalcy after whatever she went through in that institution.
Which now that he thinks about it, he's going to have to talk to Zuko about whatever they did to Azula in that place…
Considering the state she was in when she got out… Where they even trying to help her?
He shook his head. He'll cross that bridge after they deal with the Society.
"Let's go then." He smiled at Suki, not sharing the anxiety ridden face she had.
And so, he began walking out of the palace, much to the confusion of his friend.
Every part of his mind was screaming that this was a bad idea.
But he somehow knew that he would end up regretting backing out now for the rest of his life. He couldn't lose his nerve now. He had to do it.
So, he knocked on the door in front of him.
"Sokka? Are you there?"
He didn't get an answer, but he did hear movement coming from inside…
And when the door opened, he was greeted with a different face than he expected.
"Zuko? What's up?" Katara asked slightly surprised by his sudden visit.
"K-Katara?"
Did he somehow get the wrong room?
"Is Sokka here?"
"Oh yeah, he's right there." She let him in and pointed at a figure sprawled on the bed. "I was checking his injuries, only for him to fall asleep in the middle of it…" She said as she laughed. "Not like I don't feel ready to pass out myself."
"Yeah… sorry for getting you guys involved. I never expected something like this to happen…."
He wrote to them because he knew finding his mom would be a close to impossible task, and he could've used their help… But this was a completely different matter. The New Ozai Society was a matter of the Fire Nation, and his failures as Fire Lord.
"Oh, come on!" Katara's voice sounded bright and comforting. "You seriously didn't think we would just leave you to deal with this by yourself after everything we've been through, did you?"
"Well… no, but—"
"No buts!" She cut him off.
His mouth contorted in search of a retort but came up empty. So he just laughed dryly.
"I really owe you guys a lot…"
"You'd do the same for us so… no you don't. In any case, what do you have to talk with Sokka about?"
Oh right… that.
"I… think it'd be better if I waited until tomorrow."
But looking at Katara's face, he knew he had no real means of escaping her.
"It's kind of a… sensitive topic?" He made an attempt anyway, but she just crossed her arms and looked at him unamused. Although her face also showed traces of exhaustion…
Maybe he should've really waited until tomorrow…
"Listen, I'll tell you later, but I really need to figure out some stuff about… stuff. And it sort of involves Sokka."
She kept her gaze on him for a while, threatening to burn a hole through his head.
"I'm guessing it has to do with… Suki?" She said with a tired voice.
"Wait, you know?"
Was he really that easy to read?!
"Well… you guys aren't really being subtle about it you know… And I'm pretty sure he noticed too." She said while pointing at her brother.
His breath hitched.
"D-Did he tell you something?" He said with rising panic in his voice. "B-But wasn't he unconscious for most of the day? How did he—"
"I'm not talking about today… He probably noticed way before anyone else. Maybe even you two."
"What do you mean…?"
Before anyone else? But how would that even be possible when he barely just noticed himself, and he wasn't even sure if Suki was going through the same thing?
No matter how much his feelings have been growing for her, the last thing he wanted was to hurt his friend.
"I mean, she's the one that willingly decided to stay in the Fire Nation for all these years despite some of the Kyoshi Warriors staying back in the island or traveling around the Earth Kingdom." Katara continued. "I think that, in Sokka's eyes, she made a decision, even if she wasn't really aware of it. And by the looks of it, I don't think she did."
A decision? What could that mean?
But it was true that she had stayed for way longer than he had originally asked her too. Considering the attempt on his life earlier in the day was the first one in almost a year…
"But—a decision about what?"
Even if asking Katara was useless, he had to get his thoughts out somehow. He took her presence in the palace for granted and never stopped to think what that meant for her and her life outside the Fire Nation.
And she willingly chose to stay.
Why?
"Why did she stay…?"
"You're going to have to ask her that yourself." She said while shaking her head. "And just so you know, Sokka is the one that started breaking things off between them."
His face jerked up to meet hers. "Wait, are you serious? Why?"
He knew how much he loved her so why would he—
"Again. Because he noticed before anyone else. I never really found out until today but… he started moping a little over a year ago. And I thought it was just because he missed her but… I guess I know now why… I still think you two need to talk it out though. Once he wakes up of course." She said with a small laugh. "But he doesn't hate you or anything if that's what you're worried about."
His chest lightened after listening to her words. Even if he wouldn't have blamed him for it, not losing a friend over something like that was better than anything else.
"Are you sure?" He decided to ask.
Katara fixed him with a sad smile. "I think that if anyone knows what it's like to not be able to be with the one you love, it'd be him. And he's always put others before himself, even if he can be a jerk sometimes. It's been that way ever since our dad went off to fight in the war."
It took a while, but he managed to somehow piece what she said.
He's heard some thing about the princess that sacrificed herself in the north but… he didn't really know how much it really affected Sokka in particular.
He didn't know what to say. He really needed to talk to him as soon as possible.
And then, he would have to talk with her too.
But for now… he had to let Katara get some rest.
So he gave her a grateful smile. "Thanks, Katara."
But she gave him a surprised look. "For… what?"
"For being there for me… and everyone. I'm glad to be able to call you my friend."
He really doesn't want to think about where they would be if it weren't for her.
Probably not alive.
Especially him.
Katara stayed surprised for a second, but then returned his smile. "You can thank me by letting me go back to my room now." She said teasingly, but with a hint of warmth characteristic of her.
He really was lucky to have them in his life.
"Get. Out."
"Oh don't worry, I'm not planning on staying longer than I have to!"
Azula's voice was as piercing as it ever was, which was definitely not doing her any favors. And it's not like she expected anything different, but she wasn't given much of a welcome when she arrived, which managed to get to her nerves despite her best efforts.
And by that, she meant being given the most disdainful glare she's gotten in a while.
It's not like she didn't deserve it… but it was hard getting used to it.
Thankfully, it seemed like the rest of her family weren't there, so that made things easier.
"I told you, I don't know anything about the society! Kei Lo tried recruiting me but I said no, and that's it!"
"You mean the boyfriend that you manipulated into ratting them out? That Kei Lo?"
"That doesn't matter! He isn't a part of them anymore, so there's nothing neither him or I can tell you!"
She started gritting her teeth. It was obvious she was hiding something, but considering how defensive she was acting, pressing her about it might just cause her to lash out more than anything.
And as much as she'd find that amusing, she wasn't about to destroy some dinky little flower shop when her reputation was already in the dirt.
But she had no other choice. This was their only lead after all.
"Who did you talk to back in the forest?" She went straight to the point.
"I don't know who you're talking about." Mai replied quickly, which she knew by now that it meant she was lying.
"Really? Because if I recall correctly, you were talking to what seemed like an older, and larger man carrying a very distinct yellow eye color… If I didn't know any better, I'd say he looked like your—"
But before she could finish, a knife flew right past her head and into the wall behind her.
She saw it coming of course… but Mai somehow threw it faster than she was used to, which did catch her off guard.
But she wasn't sure if it was due to her being slower after so long in that hell that was the institution, or Mai had gotten stronger during these past few years.
Maybe even both.
But that didn't matter. She got what she wanted after all.
"I'm going to take that as a yes…" She said back with a smug grin.
Mai glared at her viciously but otherwise didn't attempt to deny her words.
"Why protect him though?" She decided to press her luck and ask more questions. "He's going to get caught sooner or later, anyway. This will only get you in trouble as well."
Mai once again graced her with no response and kept her eyes trained on her as if they were two deadly weapons.
But just like Aang an hour ago, there's no beating her at her own game.
"Well, considering it's Zuko we're talking about, you'll probably get off with a slap on the wrist. Or maybe even a medal of bravery or something." She said with a laugh.
For as much as she'd say she was joking, she couldn't deny the possibility of it. That is if he still was into Mai…
Suki was definitely having some movement in regards to that.
Which if she was being honest made her almost proud of the girl. Moving from that water peasant, who was a war hero in his own right, to the Fire Lord was admirable to say the least.
Not accounting for taste of course.
"I don't have to explain anything to you." Mai responded dangerously, but with a hint of… sadness? It was definitely not typical of her at the very least.
Not for her.
"You're right. You don't. But again, he'll get caught sooner or later. So you must have a good reason for this, don't you."
"You wouldn't understand. He's never been the perfect person… but he's still my father."
She wouldn't understand… She'd probably understand better than anyone.
Her father was, and probably still is the worst person she knows.
And despite his betrayal to her by making her stay in the Fire Nation during the comet, she still couldn't completely brush off those years of adoration she had for him…
Although the fact that it only took one person to treat her like a human once for her to change her ways was definitely telling to say the least.
Or maybe she was under the effect of some hidden Avatar trick.
She laughed internally.
As if that was even possible.
"What's so funny?"
Her eyes widened. "W-What?"
Dammit. Stupid Avatar.
"Can't believe someone managed to tame you into giggling out of nowhere." It was Mai's turn to smirk smugly.
"I-I don't know what you're talking about!" She protested, but the rising heat on her cheeks betrayed her words. "And no one 'tamed' me!"
"Right… it's just like you to be smiling like that and all of a sudden forming part of Zuko's little group of good guys."
Her expression was getting her close to actually burning the flowershop down.
Almost.
"There's simply no reason to keep following my father after he failed miserably during the day of the comet. I had a change of perspective."
Mai then laughed.
"And I guess the Avatar's tongue helped with that."
She raised an eyebrow.
Not that she'd deny it.
"Among other things. And besides, it's not like he doesn't have anything to gain from it."
"I'd think he'd have more to lose than anyone who would ever be crazy enough to date you." Mai scoffed out. "I mean you not only killed him, but I'm pretty sure you'd get arrested the second you step anywhere outside the Fire Nation. That can't be good for his image."
"It's not." She said with a shrug "For now, at least. The world isn't ready for how charming I can be when I really try."
Mai looked at her unamused. "I don't care enough to figure out what that means… So, now what?"
"Well… unless you decide to testify against your father, then it's just my word vs his. And I think we both know how much my word is worth these days. So it's your call in the end."
Mai lowered her gaze with a conflicted look on her face. "I…"
But before she could continue, a knock on the door caught both girl's attention.
"Hey, uhh… How's it going?" Aang's voice was heard from behind as he peeked his head inside.
She groaned.
"It's going great!" She said overly brightly, causing everyone to recoil in confusion. "You're timing is just great, by the way."
She doubted Mai would say anything now that there were other people present… At least it wasn't her family.
That would've been a disaster.
"Uh… thanks?" Aang replied lamely as he let himself inside with Suki right behind him. "We wanted to wait outside but… We saw Mai's mom on the way here and came to warn you." Suki added.
"Did you confirm your hunch?" Aang said as he walked to stand next to her.
She sighed. "Pretty much."
"Are you going to tell us then?"
She took a look at Mai. She was as expressionless as always… but she could tell how anxious she really was with the way her nails were digging into her skin.
Guess there's no harm in playing the good guy for once.
"Nope." She answered simply and began walking to the exit.
"Wait, seriously?" Suki asked in disbelief. "Isn't this a bad time to joke like that?"
"I don't think she's joking." Aang said through a laugh. "Let's just trust them, I'm sure they have a good reason for the uh… secrecy!"
"What about Zuko?! These people are trying to kill him and put Ozai back on the throne!"
"Then let Zuzu take care of it like a good Fire Lord." She replied as she was opening the door. "I'm sure this will serve as good… experience for him. But if you're seriously that worried for him, then I'm sure you're capable enough to help him through this."
"And you're okay with this?!" She heard Suki ask Aang, who didn't seem fazed by her words.
"Don't worry! We'll make sure nothing happens to Zuko in the meantime! You have my word as the Avatar!" He said brightly, as he began making his way outside.
"Tell your mom I said hi!" He waved happily to a seemingly frozen Mai.
It wasn't the safest of plans, but maybe letting the enemy come to them was easier than trying to find them themselves.
And with her with 'the good guys', they have no real chance of actually winning.
To say this moment was awkward was an understatement.
He had woken up at his usual time, which was right at sunrise, only to find no one but Sokka on the dining hall…
It wasn't really surprising considering it's Sokka… but it was still pretty awkward considering what he had set out to do the previous day.
Maybe it was sign of the universe…
Better get to it then.
"Hey! Sokka!" He squeaked out.
Great… that didn't sound absolutely pathetic.
"Hey! What's up, Zuko?" His friend replied with his face stuffed with… a bunch of things. "Sorry! I didn't eat anything last night." He laughed sheepishly, but continued cramming things into his mouth.
At the very least, he seemed in good spirits.
"Yeah, help yourself as much as you like buddy…" He took a seat opposite to him on the long table. "How're you holding up?" He asked as he pointed at his head.
"Well—" He munched. "Katara did most of the work, but it's pretty much healed by now! How about you?"
He sounded concerned… but it was hard taking him seriously while he talked like that.
"Just a few scratches here and there, nothing serious…"
"That's good." He kept munching. "When we first got your letter that you needed our help in the Fire Nation, we tried getting here as fast as possible… But waterbender boats just don't compare to Appa. Especially when you only have one waterbender. But at least we managed to get just in time to help you out fight those society wierdos!"
"Yeah… But I'm glad you made it anyways. And we found our mom too, so everything worked out in the end."
"I heard Suki went with you guys." He munched away.
He stiffened. He really didn't see that one coming.
But Katara did say that he probably knew before anyone else…
"I wanted to talk to you about that…" He lowered his gaze. "Why did you guys break up?"
With this, Sokka stopped eating, and his face became serious… but calm, in a way.
"I… messed up."
Messed up? He couldn't mean—
"No, I didn't cheat or anything." He laughed.
"I-I didn't say anything!" He tried defending himself.
"You're like, the easiest person to read in the world you know." He kept laughing. "But anyway… I realized that I was being unfair."
"How so?"
Maybe it really was him being socially inept, but he was sure that their relationship was rock solid…
"I traveled to the north right after the war ended, you know." He leaned back on his chair. "I thought I could finally get some closure after we managed to defeat the Fire Lord. That I could tell her that her sacrifice wasn't in vain…"
"You mean, Princess Yue…"
He must've really loved her…
"I thought that now that there's no reason to fight, I would be able to move on… But it's then that I realized that now that there's no death looming behind us, it became impossible to ignore the memories… What could've been, you know? If I had been strong enough to prevent Zhao from killing Tui… And it kept eating at me. And still is now."
That sounds… terrible. The last time he's ever grieved was… when his mother disappeared. And that took months to truly feel human again.
Especially since his father only got crueler to him. His only saving grace was his Uncle being there for him, and that meant so much to him.
But he lost someone he loved, while a war only kept escalating with him right in the middle of it…
"I'm sorry, Sokka…"
Because what else could he say, when he perfectly knows what it's like to live with trauma that creeps into your head the moment the room gets too silent.
"Thanks… But the point is, that it was unfair of me to pretend everything was fine, when things were clearly not fine. And as much as I love Suki, and how amazing she is… I knew I had to figure this out myself. I didn't want to drag her into my issues. Because she still had things to do, you know? Responsibilities and that…"
"I'm sorry for asking her to stay… It was selfish of me to forget that she had a life outside of the Fire Nation."
"Don't be. She's the one that agreed to stay. And I'm pretty sure she would've regardless." He then looked back down to face him. "She really cares about you, you know. But I didn't realize how much until that whole mess in Yu Dao."
He couldn't help but smile at the memory. She was the only one that actually listened to him… and she stayed on his side during the entire conflict. Even when their friends were so adamantly against what he wanted.
"I used to think that being a warrior, and a hero was what defined me—" Sokka continued. "That what I did during the war would be what I would always remember with pride or whatever… But it was the opposite. It's now that I realized that I don't really know who I am, what I'm supposed to do. How I can still make a difference, you know? And I think all of us figured that out in their own ways… Suki included."
"But we're still the same people we were during the war." He replied. "All that we lived through does matter. And we should be proud that we succeeded. We saved the world, when no one else could."
"And I am. I'm proud of all of us for what we did despite being a bunch of kids." Sokka smiled at him but shook his head. "But I think that in times of peace, the things that we want and expect of the future change. Things like dreams, goals, family… things that you can actually try to achieve now that you don't have a responsibility to fight just because the world needs you to."
He then let out a loud groan. "But getting back to the point! If you're worried that I'm mad or something because you like Suki or whatever, then don't be!" He pointed a finger to his face across the table, as he picked up a drumstick with his other hand.
"We're all adults now, even if barely. Nothing will get between our friendship after everything we've gone through if we don't let it! And that includes all of us! So just go to her room now and confess!"
"I-I-I never s-said I liked her!"
Maybe denying it was dumb at this point, but he was getting really peeved about how easy people seem to figure him out.
"You didn't?" Sokka looked somewhat surprised. But he kept eating. "Well, let's not act like that was some secret!" He laughed brightly.
He stared blankly, before breaking into laughter himself.
Some things never change, no matter how much time passes.