A/n: I know it won't be anything like this but I needed something to tide me over until Thursday so I hope you enjoy it too.
Come back to me.
His lungs burned as he inhaled sharply, bursting back to life, clinging to that plea from Stede.
He didn't hear or see much, not at first. His body tingled as blood pulsed through his veins.
He felt a pressure on his hand, on his abdomen and his vision slowly came into focus.
Stede.
He jolted forward and his head cracked against Stede's. He faintly heard Stede's small groan of pain just before the black of his own pain consumed him.
For a few brief moments all he could register was the hard thumping of his heart in his chest and the splitting pain in his head.
The black that swarmed his vision eventually faded and he blinked as his cloudy vision slowly returned. The room was dark but he could see the bright blonde of Stede's hair pulling him back to reality like a beacon.
His eyes were heavy and he allowed them to close, forcing them back open a few seconds later, expecting to find himself alone once again.
But as his vision came into focus, Stede was still there, still hovering over him now looking down at him.
Once Ed's eyes focused on his, a relieved gasp escaped Stede's lips and a smile broke across his lips.
"Ed…" He squeezed his hand tightly and Ed squeezed back, powerless to do much else.
There were many times Ed had imagined Stede to be with him but nothing had ever felt so real, so solid and he gripped tightly, grounding himself to Stede, not willing to let go, even if he wasn't real.
"S-stede?" His voice was hoarse, his throat and chest tight and burning with every breath.
"Yes, it's me, Ed. I'm here." Stede once again gripped his hand and leaned in closer. "Oh God, I thought you were dead." He whispered and the despair in his voice turned Ed's stomach.
Or maybe that was the pain. He opened his mouth, incredibly dry and tasting like blood, and a swell of nausea blinded every other sense.
He turned quickly on his side and vomited onto the floor. Stede's warm hand was a comfort on his back, drawing small circles.
"That's it. Get it all out." Stede's voice was barely audible over the sound of his own retching and his heartbeat loud in his ears. Once his stomach was empty, and convulsed painfully, he collapsed back with a groan, Stede's hand still on his back softening the fall.
Stede's hand moved to his shoulder, squeezed and then moved to his hair.
As soon as Stede's fingertips brushed against his forehead, Ed hissed, his eyes shooting open and he reeled away from the intimate touch.
Stede straightened up, his hand flying back in surprise as Ed eyed him, a wild look in his eyes.
"It's alright…" Stede tried to assure him, his hands reaching slowly towards Ed's arm but he kept his gentle gaze on his face. "It's me, Ed. It's Stede…I won't hurt you."
Stede's voice was a little fuzzy, sounding a little distant against the ringing in his ears.
His eyes squinted and his hand shook as he raised it slowly towards Stede. Stede glanced to his hand and lifted his hand to meet his and Ed let out a breath as the warmth of his hand surrounded him.
"I'm here." Stede said softly and guided his palm to his cheek, never breaking their eye contact and Ed's eyes widened slightly as soon as he met Stede's face. Warm skin, covered with just a rough bristle of a barely growing beard, his lips pulled into a smile, eyes swarming with love and tears.
"Fuck, you're real." Ed breathed, his voice shaking and Stede nuzzled into his palm.
"I am. I'm here." Stede let out a shaky gasp of his own and encircled Ed's hand in his other and drew his fingers to his lips, brushing a kiss against his knuckles and Ed could do nothing but stare.
For a few brief moments he let himself be. Be with Stede, be touched by Stede, be loved by Stede.
Once he realized, once he was more aware, that Stede really was present with him and the brief moment of elation passed, he pulled as roughly as he could muster out of Stede's grasp.
Stede blinked, faltering back at the sudden movement.
Ed had half rolled himself up into somewhat sitting. He leaned on an elbow, his muscles quivering with the effort. His face screwed up and he cursed under his breath as he breathed through the sudden rush of pain.
He felt Stede's fingertips against his thigh and his eyes forced open, casting a look at him.
Stede was gazing back at him in concern. "Are you…" he trailed off and cleared his throat and let the unasked question hang in there.
"Fuck off, I'm fine." He pushed himself up, biting his lip through the sharp, searing pain that ripped through his abdomen.
He took a few moments to catch his breath, his body curled in on itself.
"Ed, don't push yourself…"
Stede was silenced as Ed opened his eyes and turned a cold stare on him.
Stede pressed his lips together tightly and then tried again. "You should take it easy. You almost died."
"Did die." He bit out as cool as he could, though the memories came washing over him like a flood, and brought the deep emotions with it.
The pelting wind and rain, his throat burning from his screams, the shot that took him down, the terrorized faces of the crew, the crack of the cannonball against his skull…
…the weight of the rock tied around his waist, the suffocating water, the beautiful sound of Stede's voice, the image of him swimming towards him as a graceful merman - his savior.
He sniffled against the tears that picked at his eyes and a shiver rolled through his body and he shrugged in an attempt to pull himself inwards, preserving the body heat.
"Came back." He croaked, a little more softly and glanced at Stede through his lashes.
Stede lunged forward, taking Ed's hand into his. "I'm sorry, Ed. I'm so sorry."
The sight of Stede raised many emotions. Relief that he was there, that he could look upon his face, feel his hand in his. Then that bitter, angry, hurt resentment climbed its way into his chest.
His first reaction to the reminder of those feelings was to pull away, put up the front of Blackbeard, but even the thought exhausted him.
Instead he simply averted his gaze, focusing on the tip of his boots. "Whatever." He ground out which was then followed by a rough shiver that rolled through his body and chattering his teeth.
His head swarmed, reeling with a wave of dizziness and nausea.
His eyes closed again and he flinched when a second later he felt Stede's hand once again on his forehead but he didn't push it away this time.
"You're burning up." Stede's voice was laced with concern. "We should get you out of here." Stede's hand moved to his shoulder and Ed tensed, letting out a small groan. "At the very least allow me to help you up. It's so cold and damp here, Ed. You can't stay here."
As if his words spoke it to life, a chill shot through the air, hitting Ed hard and another fast and a painful shiver rippled through his body.
Warmth.
One of the very things he'd wanted to live for and Stede was offering it to him.
Stede, who was real. Stede, who was there.
His entire body screamed in agony and he knew Stede was right. He couldn't stay there and he couldn't make it on his own.
"Alright."
Stede's lips twitched slightly and he shifted closer. As he neared, Ed tried to look away but couldn't. He was being drawn to Stede like he always was, like he always would be.
"Come on then." Stede's voice was sweet and tender near his ear and a different kind of shudder rolled through his body. Stede wrapped his arm around his back and Ed immediately, subconsciously drew into his body heat.
He let out a soft sigh of relief, his eyes closing and his head turned just enough to rest momentarily on Stede's shoulder.
Stede's hand tightened around him and Ed winced against the pain that shot through him.
"Sorry, love. Sorry." Stede whispered hastily against his hair, readjusting his hand's position and Ed's chest tightened at the affectionate term of endearment. Love. The simple word sent shockwaves of sparks through his system.
With what little energy he had left, Ed lifted his head and looked up at Stede. Stede's eyes met his and his lips pressed together tightly, his other hand reaching for Ed's.
"Are you alright to stand?" Stede asked and the very thought reminded him of the pain but he nodded anyway.
He bit down on tongue, suppressing a groan as every movement as Stede guided him off the cot was another flash of pain.
He was shaky on his feet, his legs weak and slightly numb and he took full advantage of Stede's support.
He cursed under his breath as together they walked up the steps. As they reached the top, and Ed could see the moonlight pooling in, hear the wind and the waves and the soft scuffling of the crew on the deck, he froze, panic seizing his chest.
A choked sound escaped his lips and Stede glanced at him in concern. "Do you need a minute?"
"The crew…" Ed's voice broke and his grip tightened around Stede.
Stede's eyes widened in realization and his face tightened as he looked forward. "I'll deal with it."
Ed turned his head, his eyes narrowing. "You didn't try to fucking kill them all."
Stede let out a slow, deep breath and nodded slowly. "The Revenge is back in my charge. I am the captain and no one will be hurting anyone."
Ed didn't have the energy to argue. His head was pounding, his stomach rolled and despite it all, despite the hurt he still felt, he felt safe with Stede.
He knew he didn't deserve Stede's protection but he knew he had it.
Ed simply nodded and pushed forward, Stede's arm strong and steady around him.
There was an instant silence as soon as the pair emerged onto the deck. All movement had ceased and Ed was at least grateful for his blurry vision. He was nearly certain the crew that was on deck were watching in shocked horror.
"What the fuck?" A quiet voice said and Ed couldn't quite make out who it was.
"I want to make one thing entirely clear." Stede spoke, his strong, confident tone piercing through Ed. "I will be taking Ed to the captain's cabin and we will not be disturbed."
Ed's could feel all the eyes on him but he didn't dare look at them.
He slowly lifted his head, his eyes trailing across the deck. He saw some of the crew in his field of vision but he bypassed them until his gaze fell upon Izzy.
His former first mate stood leaning against the side of the ship, face slackened in shock. Their eyes met and Izzy's face quickly tightened up.
He didn't break his gaze until he felt Stede's gentle tug around his middle. He tore away from Izzy and leaned into Stede, allowing a moment to regain just a little strength.
"He's fucking alive." One of the crew whispered in a sharp hiss and the words buried deep in his chest.
It all felt like a blur, leaning against Stede as Stede led him through the familiar corridor towards the captain's cabin.
He had forgotten, over time, most times, that it had been Stede's ship first and that he had destroyed it.
He weakly lifted his eyes up to Stede, narrowing his eyes and studying him, gauging any sort of reaction but Stede was focused.
Feeling his eyes on him, Stede finally turned to look at him and his lips twitched in a small smile and Ed felt the breath knocked out of him.
Was Stede actually happy to see him?
The door was partially opened and Stede kicked it the rest of the way gently with his foot, then led Ed into the room.
His heart thudded painfully as he entered the familiar room. He had said goodbye, expecting to never see it again, and yet there he was.
A room filled with nothing but painful memories of dreadful days.
His throat tightened and he swallowed thickly and found himself drawing into Stede.
Stede glanced at him out of the corner of his eye but Ed kept his gaze focused forward.
Never had the bed looked so inviting before.
Stede continued to lead him there and the short distance across the cabin felt agonizingly long.
He let out a small, quiet sigh of relief and reached for the bed as soon as it was near.
Stede's arms were a gentle support, guiding him down.
The comfortable bed below him, Stede's warm, strong body above him, Ed for a moment felt a comfort he hadn't in a very long time.
He was ripped back to reality when his body twisted the wrong way and pain shot up his spine. He arched his back, hissing and tossing his head back against the soft pillow, grabbing onto Stede for support.
Stede held him patiently in place until the wave passed and Ed settled down onto the bed, stifling a quiet whimper.
Stede began to pull away and out of pure instinct, Ed reached for his hand, hissing in pain at the movement but grabbing onto Stede's hand for all he was worth.
Stede glanced back at him in surprise and instantly moved back in.
Ed's lips wobbled as he stared back at Stede. He was weak, in pain, cold, wet, tired and Stede was real.
For weeks and weeks he'd had nothing but memories and stupid mementos like the cake topper he'd held onto, trying desperately to hold onto Stede.
Now he was there, warm and solid and real and looking back at him with such depth of emotion, Ed hardly knew how to process it.
"Stay." His voice was weak, desperate, pleading.
Stede's face softened and he squeezed Ed's hand. "I'm not going anywhere, Ed. I was just going to go get you some water and something to clean you up. I'll be right back, I promise. I'm not leaving you again."
As best he could, he tightened his grip and pulled Stede in closer. "Stay." He said again, grounding their joined hands into the mattress beside him.
Stede's eyes widened, his lips parting for a moment and then closing again as he nodded.
There'd be time for anger tomorrow, Ed told himself as the flood of relief washed over him as Stede tried his best to maneuver himself around Ed to not hurt him. Stede apologized again and again as the small bed did not leave much room and Ed's body was jostled a few times.
His eyes screwed shut and as soon as Stede was settled beside him, starting another round of apologies, Ed turned into him, pressing his nose into his chest.
Stede froze, his breath hitching but quickly, gently wrapped an arm around him. He winced again but then only pressed in further against Stede.
Stede's own clothes were damp, cold and dirty but he could still feel the warmth radiating off of him, soaking into him, breathing life into him.
"I've got you." Stede whispered against his head and Ed nearly whimpered as Stede pressed a kiss to the top of his wet, bloody hair. "I'm here, Ed. I've got you."
Tomorrow. He reminded himself. Tomorrow he'd be angry. Tomorrow he'd hate him.
Today he had him back. Today he slid an arm over Stede's middle and pulled himself as close as he could and Stede pulled him even closer.
Today nothing else mattered besides him.
His breath was sharp and quick, punctuated by small whimpers muffled against Stede's chest. Stede held him tenderly, cradling his broken body against his own. He didn't deserve it. He didn't deserve Stede's gentle, loving caresses, but he craved it more desperately than anything and so selfishly, he gave in.
He'd done enough fighting and his body shook with the shock and effort of it all.
His eyes remained screwed shut, tears hopelessly rolling down his cheeks as he clutched desperately to Stede's shirt, breathing him in with every haggard breath.
Stede continued to whisper words of comfort against his hair, one hand solidly supporting him while the other combed through his hair.
"Fuck you, Stede Bonnet." Ed's voice was a low mumble, muffled by exhaustion and Stede's chest. Words he'd said quite a few times, and always meant it, hissed in the dark, amongst sobs on the bad days, or sneering in drunk rage. Now weak and more of a code for what he truly felt but didn't dare say.
Stede only held him tighter and pressed a kiss to the top of his head.
"I love you, Edward Teach."
Ed was barely conscious, the exhaustion and pain pulling him into darkness, and he couldn't be certain either way if he had hallucinated those words. But at that moment, it didn't matter. It felt real enough and for just that night, Ed fell asleep in Stede's arms with the warmth of knowing someone loved him.