2brown-eyes reads!

Cryin'—Aerosmith

The inside of Edward's Trans Am is filled with smoke, and Aerosmith provides the appropriate background music for the occasion. Cryin' is droning on, and there's so much smoke that I can barely make out the almost-gone doobie as he passes it over. I take it, my head foggy, and bring it to my lips. I'm numb, but there isn't enough numbness in the world to handle this news.

"What am I going to do, B?" Edward asks, tears rolling down his cheeks. "This can't be hap—" He breaks off, burying his face in his palms. "I know we were careful. I was careful."

I don't know how to console him.

There's nothing to say.

This can't get better.

It just is.

"I'm sorry." What else is there to say? My heart is breaking for him and myself. "I'll understand if you…" I trail off because the words won't leave my lips.

I mean it, though.

Even if I can't say it.

"No fucking way," he snaps, sitting up straighter. "I can be with you and still..." He pauses, sad green eyes meeting mine. "If you can handle it, I mean."

"Edward." My voice cracks, but I'm already nodding. "I want a life with you, and if this is part of that, then I can take it."

He maintains eye contact for a long few seconds before releasing a heavy breath. "Good. That's good." He takes the roach from my fingers and pulls a long draw. Smoke filters out of his mouth as he continues. "It was ugly. I yelled and denied and stormed out, but I'm going to go back and apologize. It was wrong of me, and I can see that now that I've had a little time to … accept it."

"Do you regret coming to me?" I hold in my hit, but I'm really holding my breath for his response.

"Not on your life." He gives me a small smile, his hand lifting, pausing midair, and falling back to his lap. "This complication is the only reason I'm not all over you right now, but even it won't stop me from confiding in you. This is about my life, and you're a part of that."

"You still intend to tell her about us?" I'm nervous, unsure if that's the wisest choice.

What if something happens because of it?

"Yeah," he says softly. "I can't pretend, and I don't want my kid raised that way. I want us to be good parents, and that doesn't include hanging on when it's not meant to be." He swivels his head, his bloodshot eyes on mine. "I'm going to be there for her, though. I have to."

"I know, Edward," I say, wanting so desperately to crawl into his lap and promise that I trust him. Show him how much he means to me. Tell him that I'll always have his back. But I can't. Not yet. Bree doesn't know, and I refuse to cheat again. "You're a beautiful person and you're going to make a great father." I give him a watery smile. "This baby will be lucky to have you."

"It doesn't feel like it right now." He snorts, slamming the heel of his palm into the wheel. "She was a crying mess and I just left her there because all I could think of was how you were going to react to the news."

"Is it awful if I say that means a lot to me?"

"Probably." He gives me a half-grin. "But I know exactly how you mean it. You'd never want me to be cruel…" He trails off, looking at the river that rushes down below. "Which is why I need to go back."

"Yeah, you do," I say, pulling my seatbelt across my shoulder. "Drop me at home, will ya?"

After he backs onto the dirt road, he lays his hand on the console, palm up, fingers twitching. I twine my fingers with his. "Everything is going to turn out all right, Edward."

"Just like it's supposed to," he says, even though I'm not sure who he's trying to convince.

I hope, later that night, he'll sneak away and call or something, but he never does. So I don't learn anything until my shift the next day.

And it's an even bigger mess than I imagined.

Uh-oh

See ya tmr :)