Disclaimer: I do not own EMERGENCY!, the characters, Mark VII Productions, Inc. or Universal Studios.

I only own this fictional story.

Chapter 1

"Gage? Gage? Earth to Gage?"

The dark-haired man at the grill blinked his eyes. "Huh, yeah, what?"

A sandy-haired man pointed at the grill. "Would you mind paying attention to the burgers? I'd like to be able to chew my food." A couple of the burgers were getting beyond well done. "I'd rather eat a burger than a briquette."

"Sorry, Tony, I'll eat those." He quickly moved the overdone burgers off the grill and then checked on the others.

"Man, what's got your mind tonight? Betcha it's one of those new nurses."

"Uh, yeah, sorry. Didn't mean to get so distracted."

"Hey, I get it. But try not getting lost in your fantasies while you're grilling. Like I said, I like to chew my food without breaking any teeth." Tony returned inside, leaving his friend to tend to the remaining burgers.

With a sigh, Gage took the remaining burgers off the grill. He promised himself he'd stay focused, at least until his shift ended. With the two burned burgers and the rest not as bad, he followed his partner into the firehouse.

He kept his promise to himself through dinner. He needed time to think. When the others went to watch TV, he went to the locker room. No one should bother him there.

Firefighter John Gage studied his reflection in the mirror. He didn't think he looked any different. He ran his hand through his hair. Well, he was still annoyed that they'd made him get a haircut. HE didn't THINK his hair had been TOO long , but …well …regulations.

He studied himself closer. Maybe there was something different in his eyes? Was it a look of disappointment, determination? He wasn't sure.

He couldn't shake the rescue they had had just a few days ago; the rescue that had failed. He'd lost other victims before, but this one haunted him. He couldn't help thinking there should've been something more he could've done. Maybe if there had been something like what nurse Dixie McCall had suggested, a way to treat the man at the scene, he would've survived.

His thoughts turned to the conversation he'd had with the battalion chief days before and right before going out on that run. He'd scoffed at the idea of the paramedics. He'd thought they were just amplified ambulance attendants. How could a paramedic do any better than him, a rescue man? Maybe he was wrong?

Dr. Brackett's words also haunted him. The doctor had called him an amateur for thinking the electrocution victim was alive when they'd brought him in. Gage prided himself on being a skilled and professional rescue man. Gage had done everything he could, but even the seemingly all-knowing Dr. Brackett couldn't keep that man alive. Why did Dr. Brackett expect him to do better without more training?

But what if there was something more that could've been done? Something HE could've done? The victim still might not have survived, but he could've, should've had a better chance.

"Hey, I'm surprised to find you here."

Gage jumped, hearing his partner's voice. He'd thought he'd been alone. "Man …"

What's with you? You've been distracted ever since ...the rescue of the electrocution victim. That's still eating you up?

Gage pushed himself away from the sinks and went over to his locker. He opened it and pulled out a magazine, then flipped through it. "Yeah, well, he should still be alive."

"Unfortunately, we lose some victims. We did everything we could."

Gage threw the magazine back into his locker and slammed the door. "What if we didn't? What if there WAS something more we could've done?" With a sigh, he sat on the bench in front of his locker. "Sorry."

Firefighter Tony Freeman studied his partner. He knew the younger man had a tendency to fixate on things and get emotional. But this was different. "This is really getting to you, isn't it?" Gage didn't respond. He just stared at the floor. "Wanna talk about it? I probably won't have any answers, but I can be a good sounding board."

Gage sighed as he tried to decide how much he should say. Even though he was generally happy-go-lucky, in the three years he'd been at the station, being a firefighter, he hadn't opened up much about himself. "I don't know. You don't wanna hear me whining."

"C'mon, it's not whining if it helps you. Keeping it bottled up will just keep eating away at you. Eventually, you won't be good for anybody."

Gage rolled his eyes and sighed. "Fine," he muttered under his breath. "Remember hearing about that new program?"

"The one about the paramedics?"

"Yeah, that one."

"What about it?"

"If the paramedics program was already in place, that man could be alive now."

"Johnny, you don't know that."

"He could've, should've had a fighting chance. Dixie said that there could be a way to treat the victim at the scene and during transportation to the hospital. THAT'S what that man needed. The way it is now, we should've left him there; for all the good we did."

"Johnny, that's not fair. We did everything we could. We got him to the hospital alive."

"Alive?" Johnny scoffed. "According to Dr. Brackett …"

"Dr. Brackett's bedside manner is lacking when the patient doesn't cooperate with him. Like Dixie says, the man's a sore loser when it comes to losing a patient." Tony noticed Gage tighten his hands into fists. "Johnny, none of this is your fault."

"Then why do I feel so guilty?"

"Because you're human."

The two sat in silence for a few minutes. Tony watched his young partner fidget with his hands as he thought.

"You're thinking of doing the training for the paramedics program." Tony said it more like a statement than a question. Johnny only gave a half shrug. "For what it's worth, I think you'd be good at it."

Johnny looked over at his partner. "You really think so?"

"Yeah, of course I do."

Johnny rubbed his eyes. "What if I'm too stupid for this?"

"You're not stupid. Well, some of your pick-up lines are stupid, but you're not." Johnny chuckled. "You've been a firefighter for three years, and you've already changed from being a lineman to a rescue man. You're quick to learn new training. I'm not saying it'll be easy, but you'll do alright."

Johnny nodded. "You're not going to do it?"

"Naw, I'm too much of an old dog to learn all those new tricks."

"You're only a few years older than me."

"My bones say I'm much older." They both chuckled at that. "But in all seriousness, I think you'd be a good paramedic. Your eagerness to help is what's driving you. Listen to your gut. You've always had good instincts."

Johnny nodded and shrugged at the same time. He didn't like getting praise even if he deserved it. "You know, from what I hear, Dr. Brackett is against the paramedics program."

Tony looked surprised. "I'd think he'd want more help."

"The man's a control freak. He says he doesn't want amateurs working on victims with all this expensive equipment and the drugs. By the way, that's what he called me that day that the victim died, an amateur." Both men rolled their eyes. "To me, his argument against the program could easily be for the program. I mean, if you don't want people who don't know how to use the equipment using the equipment, then train them."

(51) (51) (51)

Johnny stood outside the office door. He nervously ran his hand through his hair. He really didn't like the short regulation haircut. Well, it could be worse. If he had gone into the military, he would have had even shorter hair.

Was he doing the right thing? He didn't know if he could do this. Suddenly, he remembered what his grandfather had told him as a young boy: 'Don't let fear of the future keep you from growing.'

It was now or never. He took a deep breath before knocking on the door.

"Come in."

It's too late to change his mind. Johnny took another deep breath and entered the office. "Sir, if you're not too busy, could I talk with you?"

"I have time. Have a seat."

Johnny pulled out a chair and sat. He took another deep breath.

"What is it, son?"

"Do you remember what we were talking about a couple of days ago?"

"You mean, the paramedics special training program? I remember."

"Well, sir, I, uh, I think I'd like to sign up for that."

"I'm glad to hear that. I think you'll do a good job."

"You really think so?"

"Yes, of course. You're a quick learner. It's not going to be easy, but I think you'll do fine."

Johnny gave the battalion chief a nervous grin. "Tony said almost the same thing."

"So, you've talked this over with Tony?"

"Yes, sir. Should I not have said anything?"

"No, that's fine. I'm glad you talked to him."

"Well, sir, it was more like he noticed I needed to talk about something, and we did."

The chief nodded in understanding. Gage didn't open up much about certain things. "While I'm glad you're doing this, I'm going to miss you."

Johnny's brow furrowed. What did he mean by that? "Miss me? Why?"

"You'll be paired up with another paramedic. As of now, this station won't have any paramedics. Once there's enough trained, we probably will. But that means you'll move to a different station."

"I never thought about that. Maybe I …" Johnny thought he was done moving for while.

"Gage, don't let the fear of the future hold you back."

Johnny let out a nervous chuckle. "Sorry, sir. My grandfather used to tell me something like that. I thought of that just before coming in here."

"Sounds like your grandfather was a wise man.

(51) (51) (51)

Johnny pulled into the parking lot. He just sat there, tapping his fingers on the steering wheel. He studied the building, headquarters for the Los Angeles County Fire Department.

He'd been here about three years ago. He was just as nervous then as he was now. Could he do this?

Johnny's thoughts turned to the encouraging words of Tony, the chief, and his grandfather. He wanted to make them proud. He also thought of his parents. They'd be proud of him doing this, wouldn't they? If he could help one family to not …go through …

Johnny closed his eyes and took a deep breath, steadying his nerves. He could and would do this … if the universe allowed it to happen.

Johnny saw the handwritten note taped to the door that read:

"PARAMEDIC QUESTIONS

ANSWERED HERE

LAST DAY TODAY

R DESOTO FM"

This must be the right place.

Johnny opened the door and looked in. A man sat at the desk. He seemed to be working on some paperwork and didn't notice him.

A part of Johnny wondered if this was a sign for him to turn back. He shook his head slightly. No, that was just his nerves speaking. If he backed out at the first slightest of obstacles, he'd look like a fool. He wouldn't be the man others thought him to be, or the one he knew himself to be.

Johnny cleared his throat to get the man's attention.

The reddish-haired man looked up and smiled. "Good, you're here."

Johnny thought he said that like he was expecting him, but that was impossible, wasn't it? He'd only talked it over with Tony and the chief. How could this man be expecting him?

The man stood and offered his hand. "Hello, I'm Firefighter Paramedic Roy DeSoto."

"Hi, I'm Firefighter John Gage," he said as they shook hands.

Roy said, "Take a seat." He continued, "So you want to be a paramedic?"

Even after discussing things and filling out the application, Johnny wasn't sure about it. Was he doing the right thing? From what he'd read, if the bill to put this program into effect didn't pass, the training would be useless.

Johnny listened to Roy have answers to his doubts. He liked how passionate he sounded. This man truly believed in this program. His passion and determination for the program nearly matched his desire to help people. If they ever worked together, they'd be an incredible team.

Roy's passion for the program got to Johnny. He sighed the application without any hesitation.

There. He'd done it. He was going to become a paramedic.