Chapter 1 : Front row seat.

I was understandably still feeling like shit after the events of the previous day -or should I say night?- so, because the world hates me, the Hokage had to convoke everyone and their mothers -not so figuratively in this case- to address the whole of the Leaf in one go.

I had three solace in this that actually made the experience bearable even as I kept beating myself over the fact that I hadn't managed to somehow do more to change the Uchihas' fate.

First, since I, legitimately so, didn't want to talk with anyone because I was in the shittiest mood ever, I was under the ever-faithful aegis of my long time partner, my [Template Stacked: Imp/Aisha Laborn(T4)] power, the one who had been with me through thick and thin since I 'woke up' -read, my brain finally catching up with what I could only classify as my soul- at roughly one year old in the body of a little girl and immediately panicked once I understood where I was exactly, coincidentally triggering it for the first time in the process and providing me with the clue needed to understand what the fuck was going on.

Now, why in all that was holy did I ended in Naruto with the [Empty Hand]ed WC build I made on Neocities one day, beats me, but oh boy was I glad I actually put my brain cells to work on this one, because having the power to make people supernaturally ignore/forget you may have helped me dodge a -very forced- ROOT membership, among other things.

Of course, it didn't start as something perfectly tailored to the situation at first, but, since no one really cares about a toddler, I had the liberty to spam the hell out of it, and [Psychic-, [Covert Talent, [Information Defense] and my choice of [Power Swap] did the heavy lifting as I kept being subjected to the myriad of detection methods Naruto's punch-wizards masquerading as ninjas commonly employed even behind the 'safety' of the village's walls.

I'm not going to lie, when I finally realized I could potentially clown on dojutsu users roughly two years ago, I got mightily relieved.

That's when I finally started putting in the work that I couldn't previously.

It hadn't been enough, but, at least, I managed to haul ass just in time to save Sasuke's mother.

It had been a snap decision, just after sneaking past Itachi doing his whole 'outoto' thing, between her and the dad.

I choose motherly affection over fatherly expectations.

I hope I didn't choose wrongly and that it will be enough.

So, first solace, I was being left the fuck alone, like every time I had needed it for the last seven years and counting.

My second solace is the dango stick, happily stolen -don't judge me, I'm a fucking orphan living in a village of professional thiefs and hired killers, I'm just going native-, that I am currently chewing on as I wait for old man Hiruzen to start this little show.

The sugary treat is actually doing wonders at lifting my mood after having carried out three assassinations while exposing that shitstain Danzo in passing the previous night as the spiteful, twisted bastard that he really was.

Considering I just waded through a compound's worth of blood drenched streets hours before and that the ever-present threat of his organization had hung over my neck for more than half a decade, I hadn't felt very charitable.

Which sorta made me glad that I had no [Stamp, because, knowing myself, I may have settled on just paralyzing the guy for the next three days before hitting the sell button.

But I did not have one, nor a [Company Smartphone, just my build and the possibilities this world had to offer, so I offed the guy, gleefully.

I just wish I had been able to do so sooner, but, alas, the prick was the paranoidest, slipperiest eel that ever lived, and yesterday had been the real first window of opportunity he gave me for the last two years.

I didn't even feel bad about it, but, to be honest, that was kind of expected considering whom I had [Power Swap]ped with.

Not anyone in particular, just a generic member of a caste.

But not just any caste.

I landed in the world of Naruto with the full knowledge and experiences of an unnamed member of the Ordo Assassinorum of the Warhammer 40k universe.

More specifically, a member of the Clade Venenum. An expert in infiltration and assassination, trained to never fail at their tasks -or die trying- in an universe where everything, and I mean fucking everything, is out to get you.

Their weapon of predilection?

Poisons.

All the poisons.

An entire universe worth of them.

Once again, I'm not gonna lie, but without the knowledge pilfered from my shiny T6 status and my [Added Potential : Mokuton Kekkei Genkai] -had to somehow make those alien floras appear from somewhere, after all, and Hashirama's little gimmick was so eager to provide, considering I knew absolutely everything about them-, it would've been way harder to neutralize an entire room worth of ANBUs protecting two Kage-level ninja.

Because even if you're heavily mithridatized against poison, you can't possibly be against literally alien strains from a whole different universe.

The volatile, air-born paralytic compound I used yesterday -17 different W40K plants, 4 local ones, codename: 'Rope-cutter'- had apparently did a fucking number on Hiruzen if the particularly strained way he moves is any kind of indication, thin beads of sweat pearling on his forehead, barely visible from my front row seat.

In short, he looks like dogshit -and probably feels like it-, which is my third and last solace.

He could deal: the guy let himself get gaslight by the three stooges for fucking years when Danzo was aiming for his spot since day one and he did fuck all to solve the problems the prick brought to the Leaf, all because they were all 'old war buddies'.

I mean, are you a military leader or are you not? If so, act fucking like it and off -or at least, defang- your political opponent who's destabilizing your rule with stupid ass decisions at every turn.

I was willing to bet that my smile right now wasn't really pretty, even less kind, but he deserved the kick in the balls that I gave him by proxy.

Plus, in a roundabout way, I actually avenged his wife's death, because it could also be laid at Danzo's feets, what with him giving Obito the ritual's location during the Kyuubi's rampage.

Or maybe it was simply fanon? I honestly didn't know anymore.

Anyway, while I was still feeling down from failing to do more to prevent the massacre from happening, even after seven years worth of prep-time, I certainly wasn't feeling guilty for killing those assholes in cold blood.

I even got a little creative doing it.

As someone followed behind him, I actually startled.

I would recognize her everywhere, what with me having literally put my hand in her belly less than twelve hours ago -dearly thanking past-me for having settled on [Added Potential: Jugo's Clan Kekkei Genkai] as his mean to unlock Natural Energy, since it also could double as a bootleg cure-all in a pinch-, but Mikoto Uchiha…

…Looked like shit too, and my heart dropped a notch further.

She was pale, way paler than usual -at least from what I've been able to see from afar-, her hair greasy and unkept, the two dark orbs of her eyes -a feature characteristic of an Uchiha- bloodshot, lines of stress marring her face most awfully.

I mean, it was one hundred percent understandable: the poor woman just got widowed, her eldest son having gone rogue after massacring her clan and the youngest probably still in a hospital bed. Talk about having a shitty day.

Hiruzen starts talking, but I tune him out while looking at her, silently wondering if I couldn't have done more than I had.

I knew, realistically, that I couldn't, yet I still blamed myself.

If only I had noticed sooner how nobody went to pick up Sasuke from the playground yesterday, then I wouldn't have had to rush my preparations and probably could have saved more people.

Alas, I hadn't. I had been caught flat-footed, having to craft my disposable loadout in a hurry -the shopkeeper whose windows I broke for my delivery system's internals must've been pissed when he found out this morning-, even discounting the fact that my physique was far from its optimal state.

Once again, Danzo's fault. I couldn't really brew things to alter my DNA to 'elite human assassin's' standards without raising some eyebrows. Had to wait until the old cogger was out of the picture to really start playing the 'prodigy' and stop holding back as my [Covert Talent] -and fucking common sense- had insisted so far.

And so, the Uchiha matriarch still breathing was all I had to show for my efforts, not even having been able to ambush one of those responsible since they were standing in open air and my gear was fucking crappy.

I take a deep breath, before exhaling.

It had to be enough.

It will be.

I redirect my attention to Hiruzen, finally wrenching my attention away from the grieving widow, the spot near him, where the Elders previously stood, standing out by its emptiness.

"-effective as of today, Uchiha Itachi is deemed a traitor to the Leaf, and should be treated as such." The Professor declares, his voice steady even as his hands aren't, his physical state currently betrayed by the almost imperceptible tremors occasionally shaking his arms, "Uchiha Mikoto, as the sole survivor of age, will be instated as the new Uchiha Clan Head as quickly as possible."

To his right, Mikoto gives a shallow bow, looking as if she just remembered where she was.

Hiruzen looks at her expectantly, and, when it's clear that she definitely isn't going to talk in public right now, he turns his attention back toward the assembled crowd.

"An investigation is also in the works about the murder of three of our council members." the aged Kage carries on, making me listen more attentively -Mom! I'm famous!-, "Preliminary investigation has revealed that those were carried on by an unknown third party, by means yet unidentified, and in spite of the security details protecting them. The funerals will be held in a week's time." -perfect, now I know just when absolutely not show up, even if I'm still liable to go spit on their graves after-, "I urge you to stay strong and united while we go through those turbulent times-"

I immediately starts tuning him out as he begins to ramble about the Leaf's greatest strength -cool story, bro, but next time take care of the traitorous snake in your garden first if you really want to preserve it- and start contemplating if I'm not going to snatch another dango stick on my way back to the orphanage.

It's only because I'm still right in front of the podium from which this little show has been held as the crowd starts to disperse that I see Hiruzen approaches Mikoto, the later throwing the Kage an absolutely venomous glare, the two exchanging a few words before starting to make their way toward the Hokage's tower.

I arch an eyebrow at the display, intrigued, before following in their footsteps, my steps assured and feather-light as I weave through the crowd without any kind of difficulties, my [Power Swap: Venenum Assassin(T6)] backed by [Athletic-] and [Covert Talent] making the process absolutely effortless after years of practice.

I should've known, I idly remark to myself while upsettingly kicking my feet from my seated position on Hiruzen's desk, still under my pretty swole Stranger effect, hidden in plain sight in front of a gathering of Konoha's Clan Heads.

Now, I wasn't in any kind of danger of actually getting caught blatantly trespassing, even with the stuck up pon- Hiashi Hyuga periodically flexing his Byakugan to do extra-'security sweeps' -shittiest power-play I've ever seen, and I've literally three whole lives worth of experience under my belt-, but the door or one of the windows opening while under the noses of the Leaf's leaders would trigger everyone's carefully crafted paranoïa.

So, I was stuck here until the talks finally ended and everyone left.

Which, from the look of it, wasn't going to happen any time soon.

As Shikaku Nara -currently standing at my left, one step behind the Hokage as he just ended his reports on the Uchiha Massacre and my following clean-up- and his son would say: 'mendokuse'.

At this point, especially considering I was starting to get hungry, I was only listening with one ear to what everyone had to say.

Which wasn't much, especially since the -most visible- culprit for the incident was already stiff and cold.

I tilt my head in consideration.

They should thank me for that, actually. I've got no precise idea how many future major headaches I spared them from exactly, but I'm pretty sure it's more than five.

Which actually says a lot about the pretentious, short-sighted prick that used to be Shimura Danzo.

Kinda wish I could kill him a second time.

"Man, I'm really starting to think we should give a medal to our unknown problem-solver. After cuffing them, of course." Inuzuka Tsume callously throws out there, which instantly makes her my new favorite Clan Head.

Of course, the rest of Konoha's governing body doesn't take it that way as they immediately start to clamor.

"I'm sorry, but are y'all retarded?" the -rather vulgar- woman defends herself after getting yelled at for a solid ten seconds, "Danzo was a filthy bloodline thief, right under our collectives noses-" cue her dog barking in agreement, hilariously enough, "-and went behind the Hokage's back to 'solve the Uchiha's unrest'. Tell me, old man," she adds, jerking her head in Hiruzen's direction, the Kage's expression wooden, his hands clasped in front of him still occasionally shaking, "How many ownerless eyeballs did the ANBU found while going through ROOT's assets this morning?"

I watch through the corner of my eyes as Shikaku opens his mouth to answer but the Hokage silences him with a raised hand.

For a beat, he remains silent, mulling over his own answer, before finally sighing and opening his desk's drawer.

It takes a few more seconds for him to finish preparing his smoking pipe while everyone let him -probably understanding that as upset they are, the guy is even more done with this whole bullshit than them- and lighting it up.

"The ANBUs dispatched reported having found roughly half of the stolen Uchiha assets." the old man admits after taking a deep puff, "Which implies that either Itachi disappeared with the rest -which I heavily doubt- or that the two had another accomplice. In addition…"

He pauses, his eyes darting toward two clan heads in particular, before breaking the news.

"...Amid ROOT's agents still undergoing conditioning, two Genin recently reported as KIA have been found: Aburame Torune and Fu Yamanaka."

I raise an eyebrow at his statement, because, for one, I recognize the names, and, for two, you could hear a fucking pin drop in the whole room.

Considering the place is absolutely cramped, that's saying something.

Predictably, Inoichi and Shibi explode in anger at the news.

I smile sardonically as I watch the spectacle unfolding.

Man, after having cried myself to sleep last night, it certainly feels good to see Danzo getting shit on by absolutely everyone in the room.

For a while, Hiruzen endures the abuse levied at him -for letting it happen- and the mad warhawk -for being an unrepentant asshole and bloodline thief like he should be- like an absolute champ, until the subject of the conversation shifts once more after the blame has been properly laid on the dead man's feet once more.

"What of our mysterious, dare I say, 'vigilante'?" Hiashi interjects after a while, his tone stoic yet his body language betraying his distress -if I had to guess, the guy's rankled that I managed to vanish from the village's vicinity despite his clan prized eyeballs-, "What have we learned about them?"

Shikaku arches an eyebrow in Hiruzen's direction, who answers with a nod.

"Beyond the fact that the timing of the three murders seems to indicate a lone wolf acting solo, since they happened one after the other, very little." the scared Nara clan head's nod in Mikoto's direction, the Uchiha matriarch having remained stoically silent so far, "Uchiha-sama's testimony seems to indicate that they are responsible for her continued survival -that, or we somehow missed a fourth party acting in the shadows in this mess, which is plausible, but highly improbable-, but they seem to use a jutsu that makes acquiring information about them frustratingly difficult. All we have is an extremely vague description about a black-clad individual with a skull-shaped mask, that they did an alright job patching her up before a medic-nin finished the job, and an idea about the weapon they used."

"I'm sorry," Mikoto softly starts, her head downcast, "All I can remember is them somehow telling me that my youngest was still alive and that I should remain quiet until they are done, nothing else."

And if I have my way, this whole gathering will have forgotten about it in a week. Stranger effects can be broken like that.

All I have to do is not get caught.

And I'm very good at sneaking around those days.

"What about the weapon?" Choza curiously asks his old friend, a frown on his face.

"Poison." Hiruzen replies in Shikaku's place, exhaling a cloud of smoke, "An odorless, undetectable, chakra-less, airborne paralytic compound has been used each time. The traces are unidentifiable and nearly imperceptible in the bloodworks analyzed, but they are there. The only thing we were able to deduce was that the compound included a particular strain that makes chakra go haywire inside the body, a deduction we only reached once we realized that some deadmen's switches on the first victim's body didn't properly trigger. That also explain why we have multiple ANBUs hospitalized with severe cases of chakra exhaustion, myself having barely dodged it due to the size of my reserves."

I frown at his explanation.

There shouldn't have been any noticeable traces.

I'm going to have to rework the 'Rope-cutter' from scratch.

"Which also shines some lights about our unknown individual's motives: the fact that no one beyond the three targets were killed, and that they choose to cut their throats with a kunai before carving a character in their forehead indicates that it was personal for them." Shikaku explains further.

I snort aloud derisively, nobody noticing it.

You can bet your ass it was personal, after seven years spent looking over my shoulder because I was always afraid of getting kidnapped by an enslaving-happy asshole, all of it culminating into a massacre that I couldn't prevent.

Really, my only regret was not gloating at the bastard while I had him under my knife, but it would've been stupid and unprofessional, so I'll deal with that downer in time.

Shikaku moves forward, putting three pictures on the table: close up shots of the three stooges' foreheads.

'TRAITOR', 'ENABLER' and 'FRIGID BITCH'.

Yeah, I kind of ran out of inspiration for the last one, but I think I nonetheless managed to convey my thoughts properly.

Tsume throws one look at the picture, before snorting loudly.

"Yeah, personal alright." she drawls, "So what? We go looking for a ghost amid all the people those three apparently fucked over? Talk about a needle in a haystack."

"Not necessarily," the Nara clan head chimes, tapping the first picture with his finger, "The first character is a pretty big hint about where to look for: right here."

"You think the one who did it is a denizen of the Leaf?" Inoichi ponders aloud while scratching his chin, his pale blue pupiless eyes locked onto Danzo's close-up shot, "A poison master of this caliber? One who doesn't use one of our shops?" he slowly shakes his head, "Sorry, but I'm drawing a blank here."

His statement earns a grumble of agreement from around the table, and the clan heads soon start to exchange wilder and wilder theories about my identity.

As for me, I slouch back on Hiruzen's desk even further, settling in for what can only become a very long day of nothing-much-done.

"I require reparation." Mikoto suddenly interjects just as everyone starts to rise, prompting the various assembled individuals to exchange helpless glances before sitting back in.

Hiruzen hums consideringly.

"Considering your tone, I assume you already have an idea, Matriarch." he answers after a beat, nobody commenting on her flinching at her new title, officialised a barely an hour ago amid the various topics handled, "Name it."

"I want the official guardianship of Naruto Uzumaki." the newly minted clan head immediately answers, her tone like steel.

I straighten from my slouch atop Hiruzen's desk, actually surprised, as the other clan heads start to clamor.

"Quiet." she hisses, before giving the room at large a roaming glance, daring anyone to open their trap, "I do not care one bit that he is our village jinchuriki, nor do I ask for his guardianship because of something as inane as needing more power or prestige. I'm asking for it just as I have, years ago, when I lost one of my oldest and best friends to the Kyuubi's rampage, and when the elders, whose judgment can only be put in question in today's light, forbid me from it just as they did to his godfather."

She closes her eyes, before exhaling lowly.

"Yesterday, I lost everything: my clan, the love of my life and my eldest son, only to satisfy old men's egos. That is not me, I'm only a housewife, one who had to see Minato and Kushina's only son grow up reviled, when he should be hailed as the unheard hero he is to have taken that thing inside of him, from afar for years. And I…"

She opens her eyes, two crimson tears running along her cheeks, a few gasps echoing in the audience as I slowly blink.

Uh, I should have expected it actually.

In place of three tomoes, Mikoto's sharingan shows two asterisks-like shapes slowly spinning on their axis.

I mean, as far as traumatic events go, it's not very surprising that enduring all that and actually surviving awoke her mangekyo.

"...Will not be denied. Not anymore." she ends up with another venomous glare aimed at Hiruzen, the audience collectively rendered mute.

The two stare at each other for a beat, the silence stretching around them for what feels like hours.

"Granted." Hiruzen suddenly shatters the silence, and Mikoto slowly blinks as she realizes that she actually managed to get what she wanted.

Uh, interesting.

Guess that serves him just as much since he always regretted not giving the boisterous blonde a proper home.

Now, the two reincarnations living together under the same roof? Wonder how all that is going to turn out.

"Well, nothing to it." I say aloud to myself as the room descends into an uproar, "'Maximum Effort' it is."

[AN: fufufufu~

Sorry y'all, but my muse pesters me about that plot bunny until at least the next chapter because I got an idea while listening to a particular music.

So here we are, seeing the most direct consequences of the previous days events from the best seat possible: atop Hiruzen's very desk.

Congratz to those who predicted Mikoto awakening the mangekyo after all of that happening to her, but I bet you didn't see the end happening.

I thought about doing an interlude -or at least writing it from another point of view- for the whole chapter, but then I realized that my MC could be present for the discussion and have her PoV on the whole situation and decided to run with it.

Hope you enjoy, xoxo]