A/N: I'm back from camping and will be working on this fic for the next few weeks leading up to Halloween, so updates should be pretty regular :). I hope you like this next instalment. Reviews/ comments would be super appreciated :D
"So, what do we need?"
Emma asks as she gives in to Ruby's pestering; supposing that a promise is a promise.
Watching the blonde narrow her eyes to try and make sense of cramped cursive, Ruby grins as she puts her out of her misery and pulls a piece of paper bearing her own rounded script out of her bag.
"I wrote it out for you to save your eyesight."
"Gee, thanks."
"Shush. I didn't just do it because you're f'ing blind. Even I struggle to read some of the paragraphs in that book and my eyesight is impeccable... Especially so close to a full moon."
"Oh, fuck y-... Wait. Seriously?"
The blonde replaces her scowl with an expression of open curiosity and Ruby giggles as she shakes her head.
"No, it's normal, it's just better than yours... And I've been poring over that book for the past thirty years, so I know its contents pretty well. The interesting parts, at least."
"Twenty-nine."
"Huh?"
"Twenty-nine years. Don't ask me for a favour and age me in the process."
Emma grumbles, accepting Ruby's handwritten instructions. Glancing them over, she looks back up at the brunette.
"Is there even any point in doing this?"
"What do you mean?"
"Well, it says the charm's supposed to show you who you're destined to be with. It doesn't even mention true love, it just says it will 'provide insight on who to pursue'..."
"So?"
"Well... Isn't that just fancy Enchanted Forest speak for showing you who you're hot for?"
"I guess. What's your point?"
"Don't you know who you're hot for?"
"Maybe I do, maybe I don't. Magic works, Swan, you don't need me to tell you that. This charm is supposed to reveal thoughts and feelings you might not even know exist! I might have a super intense crush on Leroy and not even know it!"
"... Except you don't."
"Well, no, but you know what I mean."
"Not really!"
Emma replies, but she holds up her hand to quell any further argument and relents dutifully.
"Fine, I'll give it a go. But, for the record, you are ruining Halloween by bringing romance and feelings into this."
"It's not Halloween, it's just the day we said we'd celebrate Halloween because you don't have work tomorrow. And I never said anything about feelings! I presented an ancient charm that's supposed to show you who you want to bone."
"Oh, fuck me."
"Maybe that's the revelation I'll have!"
"It better not be..."
Emma warns, but she fails in her attempt to look disapproving as she chuckles helplessly. Shaking her head, she appeals wearily
"You have to stop wording things that way."
"Oh, because you're the queen of eloquence?!"
"I'm the queen of nothing, but that's sort of my point. When you start talking about boning people, Granny comes and blames me as she doesn't see where else you would have learned the term."
"I mean, I did learn from you."
"Yeah, but I don't want your grandmother chewing me out for it!... Which is another term I'd advise you not to repeat."
"Noted. And it's different now. Now that I have my memories back, it all makes sense. When we first met, though, it was like I finally found someone who didn't occasionally slip into old-fashioned ways of saying stuff, and I just wanted to be like you. I'm young, and I should be talking about boning and chewing and whatever else I want to be talking about!"
Ruby insists and she feigns annoyance while Emma struggles to swallow her beer due to her laughter.
"Okay, okay. I'll do the charm... But, you do realise it's crazy to imagine that you're harbouring intense lust for someone without being any the wiser?"
"Maybe it is, but it will still be fun."
"If you say so... What do I do?"
The blonde relents as she goes back to scanning Ruby's writing, and the brunette smiles and pulls a pair of scissors out of her bag.
"You need four strands of hair."
She instructs while pulling her ponytail over her shoulder and sectioning off a wisp.
"Mm. Of course."
Emma rolls her eyes before adopting a frown when Ruby hands her the scissors.
"Go on."
"Go on what?"
"Cut four strands."
"Wait, I'm doing this too?"
"Of course!"
It's the waitress's turn to frown, and the blonde shakes her head as she informs the younger woman bluntly
"I don't have any interest in anyone."
"That you know of."
"Ruby... I would know. Believe me. There's no one here - there's no one anywhere - that I think about that way right now."
"Then what's the harm?"
The brunette challenges, and Emma grumbles as she concedes, accepting the scissors.
"It's not so much that I think there might be harm, more just I'm failing to see the point in hacking off chunks of my hair for a charm that I know won't even work."
"Four strands, Emma. I think you have enough there to sacrifice four strands. And it probably won't work if you keep being so grumpy about it!"
"I'm not grumpy."
The blonde bristles, effectively ruining her own argument, but it's a term she's grown used to since gatecrashing Storybrooke, and one of the few used by the Mayor that actually gets under her skin. After all, she'd protest that the events of the last year give her somewhat of a pass for not greeting every single day with a sunny disposition.
That's not why Regina calling you grumpy gets you bent out of shape and you know it... It's because you know she's usually right.
"I'm not!"
She repeats, unsure whether she's trying to convince Ruby or herself, and the waitress grins as she takes back the scissors.
"You're stubborn."
The brunette counters, and Emma sighs as she supposes there's no use even arguing against this slight on her character.
"I just really just don't see why I have to do this too."
"Moral support."
"For uncovering subconscious lust?"
"Yeah!"
"Fine, whatever. What's next? What's a weaver?"
She asks, checking Ruby's neatly penned instructions before her breath catches in her throat when the waitress hands her one of two identical items she pulls from her bag.
"A dreamcatcher."
She states woodenly, and the brunette nods, admiring her own, oblivious to the Sheriff's discomfort until she glances up and spies her expression.
"What?"
"... Nothing."
Emma shakes her head, suddenly fearing that if her attempt at a charm does work, she might be shown memories, but she doesn't dare ask if this is a possibility as she has no inclination to discuss the topic further.
"Are you sure?"
Ruby cocks her head as she's sure there's been a sudden change in the blonde's demeanour, but Emma offers her a tight smile and brushes off her concern.
"So we weave our hair into the strands, is that right?"
"Yeah, from each corner. North, south, east and west."
"Very witchy."
The Sheriff grins, earning herself a perplexed expression.
"Is it?"
"In movies... Probably in reality, too, but the only witch-knowledge I really have is what Regina's told me."
"You do realise she hates it when you call magic that?"
"I do."
Emma agrees simply, flashing her teeth in a smirk as she goes about winding her hair into the web of the dreamcatcher.
"Now what?"
She checks the instructions before offering the brunette a nonplussed expression.
"Seriously?"
"I mean, that's what it says!"
Ruby reasons as she leans over to check what she's written.
"We rub these things three times clockwise over our hearts?"
"Look, I didn't design the charm, I just wrote it down."
"Okay, fine."
Emma appeases, and she supposes she feels slightly better about experimenting with their proposed charm - if not hellishly foolish - as she's never seen Gold or the Mayor doing anything as ridiculous as what she and Ruby are doing now and so imagines she's unlikely to cause any unwitting carnage through lack of practice.
"Surely, if this whole thing is about lust, not love, we should be rubbing circles a little lower..."
"Hey, what you do in your own time is none of my business, Swan."
Ruby giggles, drawing careful circles around her chest with the dreamcatcher in her hand, and she clears her throat pointedly until Emma relents and does the same.
"Your epiphany better be worth putting me through all this."
The blonde mutters and the waitress shakes her head as she ignores the Sheriff's sullen tone with a roll of her eyes.
"Is this really so awful?"
"I feel very stupid."
"Nothing out of the ordinary, then."
Ruby replies smartly, before taking heed of the blonde's scowl and backtracking before she ruins an evening she's personally thoroughly enjoying.
"Charms are always kind of silly. Most of the people who would have owned books like this one wouldn't have had any magic so they'd rely on repetition and sequences and all that to give them the illusion that they might be able to force an effect. With you actually having magic, maybe it will finally work! If not, it's not like I'm about to tell anyone we spent the night rubbing talismans on our breasts."
"The sad thing is, it wouldn't even ruin my reputation. Around here, people would just accept that knowledge and move on."
"There you go, then."
"I mean, I'd still rather you didn't tell anyone."
"Cross my heart."
Ruby grins, using the dreamcatcher to do just that before adopting a crestfallen expression and asking worriedly
"Oh no! Do you think I just messed it up?"
"I'm not sure that's possible."
Emma sighs, looking back down at the instructions and cocking her head when she reads the last step.
"Ask Emma?"
"Huh?"
"You've written here, 'ask Emma'."
"Oh! Well, the hair and the circles are all that were stated in the book. But if we want this to work, I guess you need to actually add some magic."
Ruby reasons as she hands over her dreamcatcher.
"How?"
The blonde frowns.
"Well, I don't know, do I?... Just do that glowy thing Regina sometimes does, I guess."
"I..."
Emma starts, but she doesn't really know how best to explain that she's really not all that certain how to make her hands glow or anything else extraordinary, so she simply takes Ruby's dreamcatcher and holds it out next to her own and tries to channel, well... Something.
"Is it working?"
The waitress asks.
"I have no idea... I don't think so. I can't feel anything."
"Try harder."
"I just don't want to do anything wrong."
"How wrong could this go? You don't even think it will work."
"You're right, I don't, but I don't want these things to catch fire while I'm holding them..."
Emma mutters, but she closes her eyes and tries to find that new, troubling sensation that seems to exist somewhere between her throat and her nape and urges it to work its way down her arms and into her fingers.
"Hey!"
Ruby exclaims excitedly as she observes a minute shimmer encapsulate the dreamcatchers, and Emma blinks before looking down at them dubiously herself.
"I think something happened... I'm not sure what or if it will have worked."
"We'll find out."
The brunette smiles.
"How?"
"Tonight. We have to hang them in the window before we go to sleep and then everything's supposed to become clear."
"Yeah?"
"Well... That's what it says in the book."
"Fair enough... I hope for your sake something comes of it, but I don't want any responsibility for any actions you take as a result of weird old folk magic."
"Not just my sake."
"I told you already... It's pointless for me to have done this. If I was interested in anyone in the way you're suggesting, I would know."
"I guess."
Ruby sighs defeatedly, before admitting companionably
"I just didn't want to try it on my own... Thanks for humouring me. I appreciate it."
"Great. Now I feel like a bitch for grumbling at you."
"You always grumble at me."
"I do not!"
Emma frowns, before turning towards the front door at the sound of a key entering the lock.
"What are you two up to?"
Snow asks curiously, noting the way the blonde swiftly hides whatever she has in her hand under the throw.
"Nothing."
Ruby assures her innocently; knowing she'll only cause her old friend reason to fret if she admits to urging Emma to use her magic in the house.
Hell, to use it at all!
What a waste.
"Nothing?"
David repeats with a doubtful cock of his brow, and Emma shakes her head as she elaborates vaguely
"Ruby was just showing me some old stuff she found at Granny's."
"Oh?"
Mary Margaret comes over to take a closer look, and the blonde hands over the book on her lap once she's turned it to a random page.
"Hexes?"
The Fair Queen frowns, and the waitress laughs breezily and assures her
"Don't worry, we weren't hexing anyone."
"Of course not."
Emma tags on truthfully.
"Good... Oh, that's pretty."
Snow smiles, gesturing towards the dream catcher in Ruby's hand and the brunette nods before slipping it back in her bag.
"Yeah."
"Did you have a nice dinner?"
The blonde asks, keeping her own dreamcatcher hidden while not quite knowing why she should feel the need.
"We did. We were going to stay out longer to avoid walking in on you two enjoying a poorly-acted blood-fest, but the rain's picked up in earnest."
David apologises, glancing at the blank television screen with some surprise.
"We were just talking."
The waitress shrugs, casting a withering glance to her left when Emma mutters that this seems a waste given they'd been planning to celebrate Halloween early, and she jabs her roughly in the ribs before perking up and suggesting
"Granny's going to be doing some seasonal specials for the rest of the week until actual Halloween on Sunday. Do you guys want to come over tomorrow before it gets busy for some samples?"
"Sure."
Snow agrees pleasantly, and Emma nods as she fiddles with the feathers trailing from her dreamcatcher beneath the throw.
"Sounds good. I have a meeting in the afternoon, but I'll come by once it's finished."
"A meeting?"
"With Regina. Something about the dos and don'ts of what she expects from the trick-or-treaters on Sunday, as if it's somehow my fault that kids want to enjoy the holiday."
The blonde laments moodily, and the waitress offers her a smirk as she points out
"Well, none of us knew Halloween was really a thing until you showed up and told everyone. It kind of is your fault, and I'm sure Madame Mayor will scold you suitably."
Ruby grins, earning herself a bemused headshake from Mary Margaret who makes her way towards the fridge to pour herself a glass of wine with the low warning of
"You really do bring it on yourself by pushing her buttons. You need to learn to just leave Regina be about some things."
"Regina's all buttons!"
Emma protests, causing Charming to chuckle in agreement although he tries his best to look stern.
"If Regina's all buttons, then you're all fingers."
Snow scolds the blonde wearily, causing the latter to choke on her beer and Ruby to bury her face into the throw to stifle her amusement.
"What?"
The schoolteacher frowns, and the Sheriff shakes her head and mutters that it doesn't matter. Leaning over once the Charmings become engaged in their own conversation, Ruby murmurs cheekily in the blonde's ear
"Cheer up. If your little charm worked, by tomorrow morning, Madame Mayor will be the last thing on your mind."