Chapter 7
We walk a few more days and with each step my anxiety grows. We're getting closer and closer to Moria and Gandalf's… I bite hard on my lip to cut off that train of thought. I bring my hand up to shield my eyes as we crest a hill and stand on a large rocky area. The sun shines brightly above us and it's decided we'll break here.
Bill the Pony is tied under the shade of a nearby tree, Gimli explores the rock sides, Gandalf sits to smoke his pipe, and Legolas looks around keeping watch. Boromir spars with the hobbits while Aragorn smokes and watches them.
"Move your feet." He corrects.
Déjà vu niggles its way under my skin and I sink to a rock behind me. My nervous habits double down and my knee bounces while I rip at the skin of my thumbs.
"Gandalf, we could pass through the Mines of Moria." I hear Gimli suggest and I squeeze my eyes shut. I push away their conversation, take a deep breath, then focus my eyes on the sky.
"Are you alright?" Legolas appears beside me, casting me in shadow. He follows my gaze to the sky but grunting and laughter pull my focus away. Merry and Pippin are tackling Boromir to the ground. My anxiety is momentarily interrupted, and I grin. Boromir will make a great father one day.
Aragorn stands to save Boromir but Merry and Pippin share a look then focus their efforts on Aragorn. I laugh as they easily throw him to the ground and tackle him too.
"What is that?" Sam asks altering the whole group's mood. Apprehension hits me like a train as everyone inspects the black cloud in the distance.
"Crebain from Dunland!" Legolas exclaims.
"Hide!" Aragorn shouts.
It's a flurry of movement as everyone scrambles to grab packs and put out the fire. I watch, frozen, as they hide in bushes or under rocks. Legolas grips my upper arm harshly and pulls me to a bush by a rock. I think he forgets his strength and pushes me a little to roughly down. I roll a bit before my back hits the rock. He appears next to me and cradles the back of my head.
"I apologise." He whispers regretfully.
"I'm alright." I assure him. We're so close I can feel his breath on my face, and it steals mine.
The bush covers our other side from view but does nothing for the sounds. I flinch as the overwhelmingly loud squawking and batting of wings drowns out even my own thoughts. He covers my ears with his hands, and I squeeze my eyes closed tightly.
It can't be more than a minute before he slowly removes his hands. I breath heavily and ease my eyes open. He's looking down at me with concern but I'm still too shocked to comfort him. The movies did not do the noise of the Crebain justice.
"Are you alright?" All I can do is nod and watch as he slowly pushes himself up. He rights himself quickly then reaches down to help me up too. He straightens my shirt and brushes some dirt off me.
"I'm okay." I assure.
"Spies of Saruman." I hear Gandalf announce. "The passage south is being watched. We must take the Pass of Caradhras." Everyone looks to the snow covered mountain. My stomach knots all over again and I don't know if I'll be able to take anymore stress.
We all walk in silence. The Crebain have been our first incident, and have made just how dangerous this journey will be tangible, real. We stop at the bottom of the mountain and decide to camp out one more night before journeying into the snow. I pass on dinner, still too shaken and nervous to eat. I take my tincture drop and set my bedroll out instead. I feel eyes on me, but no one says anything as I climb in and close my eyes.
I'm the first one awake, aside from Aragorn who's on 3rd watch. I rummage through my bag and pull out my leggings then hold them up for Aragorn to see, silently explaining I'm going to change. He nods and I move away from the camp. I quickly pull them on and pull my looser pants over top of them. I bend down and tuck my leggings into my socks; anything to keep the snow and wind out.
Instead of my green rubber boots, Lord Elrond gifted me a pair of leather boots that won't do much in the cold but fit in with the attire here. To finish off my look I pull on the cloak Lord Elrond gave every member of the fellowship. I walk back to camp and crouch near the coals.
"Could you help me start a fire?" I ask quietly after failing three times. "I want to get it started so Sam doesn't have to do everything." I explain. Aragorn nods and quickly gets it going again. "Thank you."
I hang a pot of water like I've seen Sam do, then go retrieve the pan strapped to Bill. He whinnies as I scratch his nose on my way back. Sam is awake when I return and smiles gratefully at me. I sit with him and help while he prepares breakfast. I only fetch utensils he needs or seasonings he'd like but he seems pleased nonetheless. I hand out bowls as people wake then grab a small bowl for myself that I mostly end up pushing around.
Once everything is cleaned up, we reluctantly make our way toward the snow. I think everyone's doing the same as me and trying to brave the cold as long as possible in hopes that when we put our winter gear on it'll give us a boost to make it the rest of the way. Even though my fingers are cold and stiff, I still pick at the skin as we walk. Legolas slows and comes to walk beside me. He covers my hands with his to stop my destruction.
"You are nervous." He says and looks at my hands for emphasis. I withdraw and stick them in my pockets. "We should not be on the mountain more than three days. Do not worry." If only crossing the mountain in freezing temperatures was the worst of it.
"It's not that." I say. "I'm nervous of speaking Sindarin after the twins prank." I offer as an excuse.
"We could practice if that would help you feel more comfortable." He offers. I consider. I already basically propositioned him, it's not like some mispronunciation could be any more embarrassing than that.
"I'd like that. Thank you."
I revise what I want to say in my head to avoid telling him I'm from another world completely, then tell him what I want to practice. His words match what I remembers of my translations, so I feel comfortable trusting what he is telling me. We spend the rest of the afternoon going back and forth, practicing how my request might go. When I've got that down we move on to other basic conversation pieces.
When the sun sets and the temperature drops, we collectively decide to make camp in a little alcove. There's a small area not covered in snow and we lay a few of the cloaks down on it. Bill lays down at the edge and the hobbits cuddle up beside him. I help spread a cloak over them and hand them some dried foods. Gandalf sits beside next, then Boromir, then Aragorn. I help spread another cloak over them.
"Sit." I say to Legolas before he can say it to me. He hesitates but then takes the spot next to Aragorn. I sit on the edge keeping a small distance between us. I throw a cloak over us, take my tincture, then close my eyes and lean my head back against the rock. Cold seeps through the cloak and into my skin. It also leeches from the rock into my back, butt, and legs. My body trembles trying to keep warm until I'm exhausted and pulled into the darkness.
"It is time to wake." A soft voice says beside me. A hand shakes my shoulder gently. My body feels heavy and groggy as I lazily open my eyes and look to the blonde. My brain feels like it's trying to work through mud, and it takes me a while to come back to awareness. Slowly I realise Legolas slips a hat on my head, then he grabs my hands and slips gloves on them. Warmth coats my fingers and I stare at them like it's magic.
He hauls me to my feet, and I wrap my arms around myself at the onslaught of cold. Within seconds he wraps my cloak around me backwards. He removes his cloak and swings it around my back the correct way. I'm basically trapped in a cloak cocoon.
"But-" He stops me with a finger against my lips. I notice my voice is weird even to my own ears.
"Elves are not affected by the cold as you are. I assure you I am comfortable." I nod numbly. "Come, we must take advantage of the sun light."
I follow him to the rest of the group. The exhaustion and bone deep chill doesn't leave me and I feel like I'm sleepwalking. I follow Legolas mindlessly as he moves to the front of the group where Gandalf is. It feels like we've been walking for no time at all, but also like we've been walking forever; my sense of time is so messed up.
"The storm is getting worse." Legolas calls. Is it? A gust of wind whips up from the bottom of my cloaks and it feels like ice tickling my skin. I don't shiver, but I stumble as I look down at my legs in confusion. "We must find shelter and settle in for the night." Legolas calls again but he sounds distant. I think I take a step but my feet don't listen to my brain and I stumble. Hands grip my upper arms and I look up at blue eyes. My lids get heavy and droop closed.
"Stay awake." Who's sleeping in this weather? I try to swat at the annoying tapping against my cheek but my hands are trapped behind fabric. I furrow my brow then frown at the hand annoying me. "Good, I need you to keep your eyes open." He moves to put an arm around my waist but I do my best to push him away in my trapped state.
"'m fine." I slur. He doesn't try again but he basically hovers over me. I put all my energy into moving forward.
"We will stop here." Gandalf says by an opening.
Legolas guides me in. It's a small cave, just tall enough for us to stand and just wide enough for us and a fire. We're protected on three sides and the lack of wind makes it quiet for the first time in what feels like days. My focus fades in and out as the hobbits and Boromir come in. Aragorn comes in last and comes over to me and Legolas to help him with whatever he's doing.
"Boromir, help the hobbits create a bed to share. Then set up two more for you and Gandalf, and the three of us. We shall need to share body heat tonight, I fear the temperature will drop again come night fall."
I move to step back and almost fall. I look down and Aragorn is crouched, undoing my laces while Legolas holds me upright.
"No, no. my bedroll'll be fine." I slur and try to move away again. I trip to the side and even Legolas has trouble keeping me upright. Aragorn looks up at me concerned. He stops what he's doing and creates a bed instead. When it's done they sit me in the middle of it.
"Gandalf do you deem a fire worth the risk?" Aragorn asks.
"We are sheltered here, and I doubt any enemy would brave the weather to get to us. Go ahead." Gandalf reasons.
Aragorn unstraps the wood from Bill that Boromir insisted we bring and starts a small fire. Legolas takes over removing my boots then socks. He quickly replaces them with warmer, dry ones. He removes the cloaks and one of my sweaters as well, then sits beside me. He's touching me but I'm cold and can't bring myself to move or even shiver.
"Give her a small sip of this then pass it on." Gandalf instructs.
"What is it?" Legolas asks.
"Miruvor. I don't believe it will keep her awake now in her state, but it may keep her warm enough." Gandalf's voice sounds muffled.
I feel a flask at my lips and sip the liquid. When the container is pulled from my lips I let my eyes fall shut as warmth spreads through my insides then fades away. Someone, probably Aragorn, sits on my right and a blanket or maybe two are pulled up to our shoulders.
"Have another drink." Legolas instructs. I do so and this time the warmth stays. I feel Legolas slide an arm around my shoulder to pull me toward him. He guides my head to his shoulder, and I can't fight it as my body gives up and shuts down.
I wake to swaying. I groan; my body feels like one big bruise. At least I'm not freezing. The sun even feels kind of nice on my face. I try to rub my eyes, but my hands are trapped. I lift my head to investigate and am met with a blonde braid.
"You slept through much." Legolas says. "A pack of wolves attacked through the night, and the decision has been made to descend and pass through Moria." I tense and feel him tense in response. "What is it?"
"Nothing." I say quickly. "So we're on our way down the mountain again?"
"Aye."
"Thank god." He chuckles and adjusts his grip on me. His grip on me? My brain finally comes back to me, and I realise I'm in a makeshift sling backpack thing made of our cloaks. I try to scramble away and he releases me as gently as possible.
"I don't need help." I say as he tries to steady me.
"What she needs, is to return to Rivendell. This is no place for her. She will not survive the conditions of this journey." Boromir snaps from in front of us. Legolas and I watch as he stomps further away with annoyance. A mix of guilt and dejection settles in my stomach.
Frodo looks back at our commotion and looses his footing. He rolls down the snow and into Aragorn. I watch, still somewhat in a haze, as Boromir picks up the ring. He holds it in front of himself by the chain and everyone stops to watch him.
It's the first time I've seen the ring. I thought there'd be some magical hold over me but all I feel is compelled to look at it. My stomach also rolls and makes me feel uneasy, but that could be because I know about it and its deceptions already.
"It's a strange fate that we should suffer so much fear and doubt over so small a thing." He says to no one in particular. I tense as he reaches up to touch the ring.
"Boromir. Give the ring to Frodo." Aragorn calls sternly, breaking us out of our trances.
I think I pick up on a great effort as Boromir returns the ring to Frodo, then he carries on ahead of the group alone. Legolas fixes his cloak around me then ushers me forward to follow. When I stumble again, he makes sure to stay close behind me. We all carry on in silence.
The snow Is much less deep now and it's so much easier to walk here. It's also much warmer. I unclasp Legolas' cloak and return it to him with a 'thank you', then I take mine off and crouch down to stash it in my pack. A dry one will probably be nice for Frodo after the Watcher. It's another few hours before we finally make it completely out of the snow.
With the last of the snow behind us, it seems the tension of the ring incident is forgotten and fades away. We walk single file as Gandalf leads us down a dark sandy and rocky path. A few small green vines cling to the side of the rock walls beside us but that's about it for vegetation here. I watch the water as we walk and while I don't see anything, my anxiety and guilt double down on me. I feel so sick I could lose the non-existent food in my stomach. I have to say something to him. I imagine he'll follow through anyway but maybe my knowledge will give him hope during his battle.
Gandalf is quite a ways ahead of the group so I speed up until I'm beside him. He looks over at me, so I know he's paying attention, but he waits patiently for me to speak. I should have thought through how to bring this up first.
"I know you know I'm not from here." I start. "But there's more to it. Where I'm from, this whole journey, is written down, a story." I say quietly.
"So you know the future of Middle-Earth?" He seeks clarification just as quietly. He seems like he doesn't believe me.
"Yes, and I know you're a Maiar." I say, cutting to the chase so he'll believe me. He looks at me with astonishment. As far as I remember no one on Middle-Earth knows that.
"So you know what awaits us in Moria?" He asks gravely. My face falls and I nod. "It is as I feared then." I nod again.
"We're going to encounter a Balrog." I whisper. "In our stories you fight him-" He holds up a hand to stop me.
"Does this battle need to happen?" My eyes fill with water and I can't stop my lip from quivering. I nod, unable to make my voice cooperate. "Then do not carry the guilt of this with you child. I shall willingly play the part Eru wishes me too. Though, I do recommend refraining from sharing your foreknowledge. I fear other members of our company would not understand nor follow this prophecy." I nod as a tear slips down my cheek.
"Do not weep for me, all shall be as it is meant to." I sniffle and nod again.
"You're gonna kick its butt." I say and try to give him a smile. He cups my cheek and gives me a sad but grateful smile.
I don't even realise we've stopped until Gimli catches up to us. Gandalf takes the lead again and I walk beside Gimli. He tries to distract me by telling me of the greeting and hospitality we'll never end up getting. I do my best to smile and hide my sorrow and sympathy for him regardless.
"It reads 'The Doors of Durin, Lord of Moria, Speak, friend, and Enter'." Gandalf announces. Gimli and I stop our talking and look up. Two trees making an archway glow against the flat rock wall. All the little glowing details are beautiful, and Gimli and I stare with our jaws hanging.
Gandalf enthusiastically speaks Elvish, but nothing happens. I barley pay attention as he mumbles to himself, drifting off in my own little world. When he yells at Pippin I come back to myself. Gandalf turns back to the door and I move to Pippin's side.
"Don't worry, he'll figure it out. Let's give him some space. I'm sure he's just frustrated." I say trying to comfort him. He nods then leaves me in favour of Merry. I hear Aragorn tell Sam Moria is no place for a pony and he should set him free. I turn back to Gandalf so he can say his goodbyes in private.
It's also decided we need to travel light. We discard everything except food, water, and clothes. We also keep half the bedrolls so we can double up when we sleep but not exhaust ourselves with weight to carry. I watch as people regretfully abandon my winter gifts, but I can't bring myself to care. I think my brain is disconnecting to spare me. This whole trip is unreal and way too much. Plus, they did the job I intended for them to do. I toss my stuff in the pile then look back to Gandalf, still staring at the wall.
This is going to take a while so I find a good sized rock and sit down. My knee bounces as I watch Merry and Pippin throw stones into the water. My gaze flicks between them, the water, and Aragorn. When are you going to stop them? I yell at him in my head. I worry my lip and will something to happen.
The water breaks around something moving below the surface. Dammit. I should have been more specific. I shoot to my feet and push my way between Gandalf and Frodo who are staring up at the door, side by side.
"Sorry," I mumble, "but the answer is Mellon." I say louder up toward the script atop the door. I don't think about my actions or the potential consequences, I just want to get Frodo safely away from the water.
Everything rumbles as the stone swings out toward us and I basically shove Frodo in ahead of me. My pack slips from my shoulders, and I let it fall to the floor before I turn back for the others.
"Get back!" Aragorn shouts and I place myself between Frodo and the entrance as everyone else rushes in. I can hear splashing in the distance before everything is silent again.
I hear them all moving about behind me, discovering this is a tomb and not a mine, but my gaze is trained on the door. The water is unnaturally still now but I know that can't be it. Gimli laments his fallen kin and I want to tell him to be quiet but I don't get the chance.
A tentacle shoots out of the water and directly toward me. It wraps around my waist in a second and pulls me through the doors. I scream as it lifts me into the air. Blood rushes to my head and my ears whirl as I'm turned upside down.
"Strider!" Sam calls.
I scream again. My copper hair dangles and tangles around my face. My sense of direction goes out the window as I'm whipped around; it jerks me left and right. The movement stops and I push my hair back to see why.
My heart jumps up my throat. A few feet below me are the creature's giant, and many, teeth. There's yelling from the shore and shallower water, but I can only stare my death in the mouth. Of all the ways I could die I'd never though it'd be this.
My stomach drops, the kind of feeling you get on the downslope of a roller coaster, as it releases me and I fall. There's a grunt as Boromir catches me. I cling to him while he runs us to shore. Cold water splashes me, soaking us both, but I don't care. I'm just happy to be out of that things grasp.
Legolas shoots an arrow past us and the demonic octopus thing lets out a haunting howl. Boromir sets me on my feel inside the door and we run with everyone else further in. I turn and sit on a rock and watch as its tentacles destroy the exit. Dust clouds the air as giant boulders fall to the ground. It bathes us in darkness so black I can't even see my own hand right in front of my eyes. A bright white glow from Gandalf's staff quickly lights the room.
I wrap my arms around my stomach and rock back and forth. That wasn't supposed to happen to me. Did something change because I interfered? I was only trying to spare Frodo. Aragorn kneels in front of me.
"I'm fine." I say before he can touch me.
"You are trembling." He says as a shiver wracks my body. "You should change. You just overcame freezing not long ago." I nod at his instructions.
Legolas sets my bag next to me then removes his cloak and holds it up like a wall. Aragorn silently questions me, and leaves when I nod again. I change into dry clothes as quickly as I can, then wrap my cloak around me for comfort. The wool is scratchy on my skin but it feels like layering myself in a protective cocoon.
"Wait." Legolas cautions looking over his shoulder when I try to move around him. When he's satisfied, he lowers the cloak. Boromir is wearing new dry clothes too. Legolas and I join the others as everyone collects themselves. Everyone settles and looks to Gandalf.
"We now have but one choice. We must face the long dark of Moria. Be on your guard." He warns us, walking to the front of the group to lead. He looks resigned and avoids eye contact as he passes everyone. I try not to let the guilt eat at me.
Legolas follows behind him, bow in hand, then Gimli, the hobbits, Aragorn, and Boromir. I stand frozen. I can't get my feet to move. Every step we take is a step closer to Gandalf's demise. Almost as if he can hear my thoughts, he turns to me.
"Come dear, you would not want to be left behind." The rest of the members turn to me and my face flushes. I look down and hurry to walk between him and Gimli.
I need to get it together. There's no reason to be acting this way. This is all a story, these are all characters, and I know everything is going to work out in the end. I reason. We're not going to think about Boromir. I force myself to not look back at him as I pass.
It feels like all we do these days is walk, and Gandalf saying we'll be down here for four days does nothing to lighten the mood. Everything looks the same; dark, grey, and sharp. I'd almost think I'm looking through a Black and White filter if it weren't for the colours on our clothes.
Most of the paths are so narrow we have to walk single file, or we're squished up against a wall. On one of those walls, light reflects from shiny veins. Gandalf touches it gingerly then addresses the group.
"The wealth of Moria is not in gold or jewels, but in mithril."
He holds his staff out and increases the light. We all move to look at what he's trying to show us. I wish he didn't. Why did I look? I sway at the giant chasm before us. Falling down there would be sure death. It's a mine that goes down forever. The shiny ore branches along all the walls below us. It's really something to see but I press back against the wall again and take a few steadying breaths.
"Bilbo has a shirt of mithril rings that Thorin gave him." Gandalf says pulling his staff back and he continues leading the group on.
"That was a kingly gift!" Gimli says in awe. I send a silent thank you to the God's or Eru or whoever it is that prompted Bilbo to pass that shirt on to Frodo.
We walk in silence for a long while after that. When we come upon an open area with three pathways, Gandalf stops. He claims to have no memory of this place, more so to himself, then he tells the group to rest a while. To get some sleep if they can. Boromir and Aragorn sit together smoking and talking quietly. The hobbits have a snack of granola bars and dried meat before napping all huddled together. Legolas perches on a rock outcrop that he can watch over the whole group from, and Gimli wanders slowly, taking in what's left of the mine.
Gandalf sits cross legged and I join him. We sit in silence. Even though he speaks no words, his presence still brings me comfort. His guidance to all the group brings a steadiness that's been needed, but was not conveyed well enough in the movies. I love the movies and always wished I was in them but being here, in this dark, stale place… I miss home.
"I loved Rivendell, but I wish I never got stuck in Middle-Earth." I say quietly.
"So do many who find themselves in unfortunate situations. Alas, that is not for them to decide." He looks over to me. "All we may decide is what to do with the circumstances given to us." I look down at my hands, fiddling with them in my lap.
"There are other forces at work in the world besides the will of evil. Bilbo and Frodo were meant to bear the ring. The more I learn of you, my dear, the more I believe you were meant to come to us as well." Pressure prickles under my eyes. "That is an encouraging thought I'd like to think." I wrap my arms around myself and look at the pathways for something to focus on so I don't cry. "Do not fret, all will be as it should."
I can't help it, who knows how many days in here, with no sunlight or fresh air, has worn me down and everything feels more intense. Plus, there's an odd sense of anxiety wishing time to slow down to postpone the events to come, clouded with another sense of anxiety of just wishing for things to happen already so we can get them over with. The outcome is an oddly calm acceptance, enough so that I'm able to fall asleep on Gandalf's shoulder.
When I wake, I'm covered with another cloak. I look at it in question and Gandalf nods over to Pippin, silently telling me the article belongs to the hobbit. My heart melts a bit at the sweet gesture. I uncurl myself and push up. My body aches and my neck is stiff from sleeping on rocks but I don't complain. Everyone is in the same boat.
"Thank you." I say returning the cloak to Pippin. He's about to say something when Gandalf interrupts.
"Ah! It's that way."
Everyone stands excitedly. We're all more than ready to get out of here. We walk single file down more stairs until Gandalf lights a room for us. It's massive with giant pillars lining the open space. We walk slower now, everyone taking in Dwarrow Delf in wonder. The fact that they could build something like this astounds me.
Gimli runs to our right. A room with a single beam of light shining down comes into view and my stomach sinks. I chase after him which causes the rest of the group to move too. I watch as he slows and I hesitate, unsure if I should try to comfort him or give him time to mourn alone. My heart constricts at his cries. I think I'd rather do anything but see someone cry, maybe even willingly let someone hug me.
"He is dead then, it is as I feared." Gandalf says beside the tomb.
Gimli lets out an agonized cry and it solidifies my decision. I bolt forward and fall to my knees beside him. I wrap an arm around him and he buries his face in my shoulder, clinging to me while he cries. I hold him to me with my other hand, lean my head on his, and do my best to be the strength and composure he needs at the moment. I watch the other members remove their hats or bow their heads to show their respect, even Legolas takes a knee beside us.
Gimli sniffles once then lifts his head. He sends me a silent thank you and I nod back at him. We both stand and watch as Gandalf gently leafs through a book. He reads the retelling of Ori's last days in the mines. I flinch when the skeleton and chain interrupt, echoing down the well to the side of us. Gandalf closes the book, sets it down, then tramps over to Pippin.
While everyone watches to see what Gandalf will do, I crouch down to shove the old book in my bag. He may not be thinking of it now but I'm sure Gimli will want this later. Theres a moment of silence while everyone accepts that was likely a bad omen.
"Fool of a Took, throw yourself in next time and rid us of your stupidity." Gandalf snatches his hat and staff back from Pippin and I flinch for him. I want to comfort him but before I can, a sound like beating drums reverberates up through the well.
"Orcs!" Legolas spits out the warning. Pippin quickly shuffles back to the group. Gandalf herds me and the hobbits back to the back of the room then stands protectively in front of us.
An arrow embeds in the door near Boromir's face and he and Aragorn heave the heavy wooden doors closed. Legolas and Gimli toss them old abandon axes to reinforce the doors then almost all at once the men unsheathe their own weapons.
There's a tense moment where we all watch the doors rattle at the strain of staying closed against the orcs. Gimli hopes up on the edge of the tomb and draws his axe high in the air. Legolas and Aragorn shield him, bows drawn, and Boromir stands to the side, sword at the ready.
"Let them come, there's still one dwarf here who draws breath!" Gimli decrees.
An axe breaks through the wood and Legolas fires two arrows through the hole to the orc on the other side. The doors breaks, falling to the ground, and Legolas and Aragorn let arrows fly at the horde pouring in. One arrow strikes an orc in the eye and I want to be sick.
The hobbits and Gandalf charge forward with battle cries and I watch them like they're crazy. I back up against the wall and grip it with both hands for support. Metal clashes with metal, heads topple from bodies to the ground, and everyone moves so fast it's hard to focus on any one being.
The chaos of the room stills as footsteps shake the ground. A giant, ugly looking, troll stomps through the doors. Saliva strings between its long pointed teeth as it roars and it's putrid breath fills the room with a foul smell. Legolas lodges an arrow in its chest and it charges forward to Sam in rage.
Sam slides between its legs and it turn to follow him. Aragorn and Boromir grab its chain and pull, but it's not enough to stop it. I propel myself forward and grab the end, assisting their efforts. We pull together and it turns back to us. Aragorn and Boromir move to the side but I'm too late. It whips the chain to the side and I go flying against the wall.
The air is pushed from my lungs as I collide with the rock. My body crumples to the ground and I roll a few times across the floor. My vision swims and I blink hard to try and clear it. An orc stands over me with its sword drawn. Before I have time to react, another sword pierces its chest and I look to my left. Boromir is glaring at me empty handed. He looks to the orc who was above me as it falls to the ground then he turns and rips a sword from a body beside him to join the fight again.
I groan. Pain radiates through me, but I know I can't just lay here. I push myself up and scan the room. Gimli and Aragorn are fighting a second giant troll while the others are picking off the smaller orcs. Legolas is on a ledge above me dodging the heavy chain the first troll is whipping wildly around.
The end of the chain collides with the rock to my left and creates a hole in the wall. I squeeze myself in there and watch as the troll swings at Legolas again. The chain catches on something above me and Legolas sprints across it like a balance beam to stand over its head. He fires three arrows down into its skull and its body goes lax. It falls to the ground and Legolas hops off in my direction. He helps me out of my hole to stand.
"Are you alright?" he asks, worry marring his face. He inspects my face and I flinch as he prods a particularly tender spot.
"Just some bruises and scrapes." I assure him even though it hurts to just breath. We don't have time to deal with that now.
"Frodo!" Aragorn calls out and the room goes silent. Over Legolas' shoulder I can see everyone gather around Frodo, but Legolas is still checking me over. I stand still and let him assure himself I'm okay. I try to breath as normally as possible until he turns and we make our way to the rest of the group. While the attention is on Frodo, I allow myself to flinch and wince and then lock it all down.
Frodo groans as Aragorn rolls him over. Frodo assures them he's alright then shows them all the mithril shirt. Sam runs his hand over Frodo's chest where he got stabbed like he can't believe it.
"You are full of surprises, Master Baggins." Gimli says impressed.
"I am sure there is still damage from the blow." Aragorn says. "Lift the bottom so I may check." He instructs.
Frodo does as Aragorn says. A dark purple bruise is already forming. Frodo flinches as Aragorn gently touches the edge. He looks worried and starts throwing out instructions.
"Sam, prepare the Mentha salve for me, Legolas, tear me some long scraps of fabric."
Sam quickly riffles through his pack to pull out the salve. Legolas leaves my side to tear strips of fabric from Frodo's cloak. Aragorn helps Frodo roll his layers up, then takes the salve from Sam. They make quick work of their tasks and tending to Frodo.
"This should help with the pain." He says as he smothers the past over the bruise. Frodo flinches but stays still so he can work. Boromir helps Frodo lean forward when he's done so Aragorn can wrap Frodo's chest.
"The compression will help with the swelling." He says tightly winding the pieces Legolas ripped around Frodo's chest. When he's done, he smooths the layers back down and the three men help him stand up.
"Does anyone else need care?" Aragorn questions. I look around the room and meet Boromir's eyes. He's waiting to see if I'll say anything. I don't. I already feel like he feels displaced having to abandon his sword to save me and I don't want to be anymore of a burden.
"Alright." He says when no one speaks up. "Let us move on before more come."
The group collects their things and makes for the door. There are only 8 bodies in front of me. I stop and turn back. Gimli is standing, head bowed, by the now broken tomb. I walk to him and rest a hand on his shoulder.
"Gimli," I say gently, "we have to go." He gives no response and I look back to the group. Legolas has stopped and is watching us. He debates something internally then walks to us.
"Gimli, we must go. Do not let their deaths be in vain. Help destroy the ring then come back with reinforcements to take back Moria." Legolas says inspirationally.
"Aye," he nods his head minutely, "I will help restore Moria to the vision my kin dreamed." He takes one last longing look then he turns and walks through the door without looking back. I give Legolas a grateful smile and we follow Gimli out.
Theres a screeching sound and we jog to catch up to the group. They haven't made it far but I have to slow down as we descend some stairs so I don't trip. When we catch up, Gandalf anxiously addresses the group.
"To the bridge of Khazad-Dûm!"
Gandalf's words land in my stomach like lead. I was too busy trying to survive the orc and troll attack that the balrog slipped my mind. I don't have time to think about it anymore as the men start running again through the stone archway. I have to force myself forward, toward the bridge, toward the balrog, toward the death of Gandalf the Grey.