Chapter 19- Epilogue

One Year Later

BEEP!BEEP!BEEP!

Jay groaned in deep annoyance for the sound, rolling slowly yet hurriedly off of his stomach and to his side, finding his phone that was humming, buzzing, seriously shaking the whole apartment awake. He hated hearing the thing, but it was the only alarm that got him up. Post accident life revealed a new and welcomed part of Jay, which was being a somewhat deeper sleeper. Certainly he still had the bad dreams and the harsh slaps into alertness from time to time, not too mention the very active sleep state he'd stumble into from time to time. But when he would sleep soundly and normally he'd sleep for massive chunks of time, but on the back end that meant he was next to impossible to wake up. Doctors appointments were now scheduled in the afternoon and 9am would typically see Jay passed out, which in the days of old he was well into his second cup of coffee of the day and elbow deep in paperwork and case activities. Times were changing, whether it was for the good or bad was up to the interpreter to decide.

"Fuck," Jay mumbled aloud once the phone returned to its usual, silent self. He half slammed the device back on the bedside table, now falling to being on his back and taking the next few minutes to stare up at the ceiling. It was the same white as it always had been, but his ability to tell the color was weirdly a good barometer for how the day would go. If the vision was in tack and colors were able to be identified, then he'd most likely live life as normally as he could. If the ceiling was florescent blue or green or just flashes of things, break out the meds and cancel all his plans. Jay closed his eyes, feeling his chest rise and fall under his clasped hands, appreciating the ability to do that, to feel himself breathing on his own and to sense his hands on his person. A foot twitch rippled out not too long after, his grumbling stomach making him chuckle to himself. The system was firing on all cylinders today. Even now, so many weeks and months post surgery and accident, this was a feat for him. There were still days he struggled to get out of bed, or days that dragged on and were overly tiresome, or days that were completely blacked out in his mind. But today, of all days, he just knew he was going to remember this day and everything would be fine. He'd been looking forward to this one for a long time now. He had to admit, there were some nerves and hesitations, those fleeting thoughts to back out and push things into next week. But as he laid there and let time slip away, he had that gut feeling that today would be the polar opposite of the last time this day rolled through the calendar.

"You better not be asleep," from across the room ended Jay's little centering moment, an eyelid prying open as he smirked in the direction of the voice.

"You know I'd love to be." Hailey just rolled her eyes, gripping the plate and cup in her hand a little tighter before she advanced into the room. Confession on her part, she'd been standing at their bedroom doorway since Jay's alarm went off, quietly watching him turn his own alarm off before landing on his back and doing his breathing technique. It was taking everything in her to not well up in tears. On this day one year ago, none of that would've been possible.

"Come on, you don't have a ton of time before you have to leave. The driver said they'd be here in twenty."

"Minutes?"

"No, days you dummy," Hailey teased. Jay smirked once more, making himself put in the effort to sit up in bed and at least push the blankets off of himself as Hailey made it to his side of the bed.

"Eat, drink your overly creamed coffee and I already have your shot on the counter," she instructed.

"It's shot day already?"

"It's the 28th. It's shot day." Jay groaned through his bite of peanut butter toast, sighing rather out loud as he nodded.

"The bathroom? The kitchen?!"

"Bathroom is fine," Jay spoke with a crumb or two flying out of his mouth. He knew he had no other choice, the shots were what helped him exist and conduct any form of a normal life, but still he hated having to administer a shot to himself every single month.

"Hey, its your cost of living," Hailey reminded him as she walked out the door. She knew this wasn't easy for him, that no matter how many times he'd be around needles and doing it himself he'd still be petrified around them. It was the worst form of punishment for Jay this side of the accident. If anything it made his needle phobia worse. Immersion therapy was not Jay's thing, clearly. She returned with the box in hand, shrugging and sighing as she watched his eyes lock in on the box as it entered the room, went through, before entering the bathroom.

"Jay, come on. You need to get going," she alerted once the shot and its buddies were lined up and ready to go.

"Coming," Jay sighed, forcing the last large bite of toast into his mouth before feet touched down on the floor. The day was officially underway.

Entering the bathroom Jay caught a glimpse of himself in the mirror, his now very wavy and full hair in the most brilliant form of bedhead. He'd let his hair grow out a little more than what he usually had, saying that since they gave him a clean slate without his permission that he was going to change things up a little. Thus the waves coming back and the more ruffled hairstyle he'd been trying out the last little bit. It was a new Jay, new look mode and he was thoroughly enjoying it. He ran his hands through his hair a couple times, trying to tame things and force it into place, but gave up when it only looked messier by the time he was done.

"Sit, let's just get this done," Hailey spoke up as Jay took a seat on the close toilet seat lid, making sure to pull his sleep pants down to his knees as she ripped open the alcohol wipe and hovered it over his upper thighs.

"Which one?"

"I think we did the left last time so right I guess? Just hurry up." Hailey nodded, feeling awful for how nervous Jay was right then. Her touch with the wipe made him flinch, unsheathing the pen-like syringe had his eyes shut tight, as she undid the safety on the syringe before turning it over to land on his leg, Jay's breathing picked up immediately. She wished there was another way to do this complex migraine treatment plan, but it was this or suffer with debilitating migraines every single day.

"Here we go. 1…2…" she counted down, never getting to three as the needle was sprung free and plunged into Jay's leg. He jumped at the insertion, resting his head on her shoulder as the burn of the medication rolled across his leg.

"Sorry, I'm so sorry," she softly spoke as the two of them quietly counted to thirty. The migraines were always there since he woke up from the surgeries and coma. Everyone thought it was part of the recovery, or a factor of the many surgical sites that were healing and fusing back together. But a month after he got home, Jay was having horrific migraines every single day, each time the symptoms getting worse and worse. He'd wake up with very blurry vision and bruised feeling eyes to no longer being able to stand on his own from dizziness, and plenty of nausea spells and vomiting here and there. The vision changes were the most terrifying part, Jay saying he was seeing full sized black spots or nonstop flashes of light. That one prompted a return to the hospital and few nights of being checked in for testing before it was concluded that Jay had developed chronic, complex migraines and was most likely dealing with them for the rest of his life. The newfound cost of Jay living and surviving the impossible was making itself known. It was shots every month and always having to carry special medication with him, but at least this stuff was oral.

"All done," Hailey praised when the syringe was freed from his leg and a bandaid covered the little needle point mark on his leg. Jay was overly excited to pull his pants up before getting to the morning routine of brushing his teeth and styling his hair.

"I left your outfit out in the closet hanging up," she said when she returned a few minutes later, rolling her eyes and laughing to herself as Jay was literally making sure every hair was perfectly in place. Most days he didn't care if he walked around never brushing his hair, today it was all about the products and perfection. It couldn't be more obvious he was nervous.

"Nervous," she inquired while crossing her arms and resting against the doorframe.

"What?! No, it's just a job."

"Um a job with the FBI. You get to be lead agent on a drug task force for the entire Midwest. Starting today you're now federal agent Jay Halstead. That's not just a job."

"Are you trying to make me nervous?"

"No! Never," she chuckled.

"I'm just…super proud of you. That's a massive deal. And best part, you get to stay here." It was very much true, the FBI came knocking on his door quite literally one day. Jay had just returned home from another health scare that landed him in Med for a week's long stay. There was a knock on the door, Jay opened, the mystery person said they had an offer that Jay couldn't refuse and he accepted. When asked how they even knew he'd be looking for a job soon, the answer was that a person from his past called it in. Jay had too many names to know exactly who orchestrated all of this, but was grateful someone out there was looking out for him. The specifics of the job had to be ironed out, like Jay needing time at home and time in an office and wasn't cleared to do full field duty, and driving was not allowed at this time as he was still on blood thinners, but soon enough a deal was made and Jay Halstead was officially a member of the FBI.

"Just don't tell me you picked out some suit. I don't want to be some stiff with shiny shoes and a stick up my ass."

"Dude, it's a blazer and jeans. I even gave you a normal t-shirt underneath. Just please go get ready so you're not late." As Jay ventured his way into the closet Hailey did her usual task of cleaning up behind him. The bathroom had to be wiped up after the counter was littered in his water mess and hair products left all over. Once the towels were back in their usual place and things tidied she went to the bedroom, pulling sheets and blankets up to a made state before she fluffed up the pillows. It was in the process of going from his spot to hers that the sigh of a worried or slightly perplexed Jay Halstead that made her stop her activities and turn around to face him.

"I think I look like a dweeb," he expelled as he pulled at his jeans pant leg so push it further down his leg, his blazer getting a tug or two as he did his very best to make things more relaxed and it was failing epically.

"Jay, you look hot," Hailey thought aloud, rather proud of herself for pulling this look together. The navy with the dark green shirt to match his lighter jeans and a good, deep brown boot were killer. No way was he not looking like the guy in charge. But it was the finger accessory on his left hand that made her blush and approach him.

"And…I like the ring," she said as he ran a hand over his shoulders, standing on her tip toes. She watched Jay nod, look down at his left hand and flex his fingers before speaking.

"Yeah…it felt right for today."

"Just today?"

"No, but today it felt like a good time to try it out again." Hailey continued to stay on her tip toes, truly stretching to grace her lips across his, Jay bending down a little to help her out. It took over a year to get to this point, but the wait was immensely worth it. They weren't where they needed to be, but as she felt him embrace her and the two of them finally connecting in such a way, the wait was going to be worth it. A year ago life looked to be up in smoke and closer to six feet under than anything else, today they were here embracing and embarking on a whole slew of new adventures. Take those risks in life, embrace the uncertainty now and again, because you may stumble into an amazing story that you're honored to be a member of.

"I've gotta go," Jay came up for air with, his buzzing phone in his jeans pocket what ended things. Hailey grabbed his hand for a couple steps before letting go. She felt to have done this exact same thing a year ago, but at least this time they'd reunite in a normal and conscious way over the other end.

"Love you! Proud of you, Jay," Hailey stood in the room with as Jay got closer to the bedroom door. He turned to her, gave her one of those rare Jay Halstead smiles and nods before waving things off.

"Love you too, Hailey. See you tonight?"

"Unless things go late, I will be here when you get home. Dinner tonight?"

"Surprise me. But seriously I've got to leave."

"Go do your thing," she shooed with, watching him disappeared from her view and earshot as his footfalls made their way to the front door, and getting out into the hallway. Jay Halstead, agent for the FBI was off and on his way to amazing things. A life he didn't see happening when he took off from O'Hare International Airport for Bolivia over a year ago. It was different, it was nothing he had on the radar, but it fit him so perfectly and allowed him to find himself once more. He may have taken the long way round, but Jay Halstead was finally at peace and home.

Screen fades to black. End credits roll