~ Author's Note ~

Welcome to 'Your Emerald Eyes'

Chapter Fourteen - A Cold Swim

I hope you enjoy!

A/N - I last updated this story on November 7th, 2018. It's been nearly five years since I've even looked at this story. My life has changed, the world of Harry Potter has changed, and the memories I have of the world are stored away so deeply within me, so much so that they have shaped almost every aspect of my life. I remember workshopping these chapters with my good friend Ashleigh, someone I'd never met and yet shared such a deep connection with. Harry Potter created that memory for me. I remember being a part of those early Facebook groups, creating memes and quizzes and sharing our joy of the world. I wanted to be a writer, something that I'm still working towards. Everything stems from those early days. I was barely a teenager when this process started, and now I'm 27 and still have a world ahead of me. I've struggled with addiction, with mental health issues, and pushed through it all to return once again to this world.

So, my loving readers, if you manage to read and see this update, I hope that you're well. I hope that in these five years, you've accomplished what the younger version of you would've wanted. I'm returning to help shape my writing, to help connect with the world that has never left me. And Ashers, if you're reading this, I miss you and will always keep those memories close to my heart.

Without further ado, welcome to this short chapter!

It had been over a week since Lily and James had been rushed to the Hospital Wing, Sirius beckoning them with news of another attack. The fifth year prefects, Ashleigh and Toby, had been viciously harmed. James had told Lily that Sirius was looking into it, 'sniffing out the crime', he had said. However, it had been a week and there had been nothing to report back on. Despite their efforts, the Gryffindor seventh years had had no success in helping Dumbledore figure out the attack.

It was early morning on a Saturday, and Lily was waiting outside of the Hospital Wing. She could see Ashleigh talking to her fellow fifth years, gifts surrounding her hospital bed. Chocolate Frogs, miniature broomsticks, and more hung around her as though all of the school had gifted her something. Lily had no doubt that James - with his gorgeous hazel eyes - had funded most of those presents. She smiled to herself. He was mature, thoughtful, and everything she had wanted from him since they had first met on that fateful day aboard the Hogwarts Express. She had never even known that she was waiting for him. All of a sudden, it had clicked for her. She'd had no boyfriends and been on no dates, and no attention had ever been given to another boy like she had awarded to James. Yet, the ball was in his court now. She had kissed him, wore skimpy clothing, and was now spending more and more time with him. Yet he still wasn't making a move.

'Flower!' she heard a bark from behind her. She turned, Sirius carrying an enormous bouquet of flowers. 'Hey, a flower for my Flower,' he grinned, picking one of the roses out and passing it to her. 'For Ashers. I'd have picked some for Toby as well, but...'

Toby was still unconscious. Whatever spell had been used on him had been strong indeed. Madam Pomfrey was seriously concerned, and his parents had been receiving updates each day, staying a short distance away in The Three Broomsticks. Lily had spoken with them on the prior Sunday. They reminded her of her own parents, simple and full of love for their children.

'Thanks,' she said drily, passing the flower back to him. 'I think she needs them more than I do.'

He nodded, luscious hair flowing behind him, almost as messy as James'. 'Where is James?'

Lily shrugged, 'I would've presumed he was with you.'

Sirius shook his head. 'He's probably with Remus and Peter, still figuring out the best way to start this defence club of his. Has he spoken to you about it?'

She could tell he was delaying their entry into the Hospital Wing, and rather guiltily, she was appreciative of that fact. It was hard, watching another muggle born go through pain simply because of her heritage. Lily could see herself in Ashleigh, and she knew that it was only to her good luck (and Ashleigh's poor luck), that she was standing strong. She'd give anything to make sure not one other muggle born was hurt.

'We spoke about it again last night,' Lily mentioned, remembering their conversation in front of the fire in their common room. 'He doesn't want any Slytherin to be included, which will be difficult once word begins to spread.'

Sirius snorted. 'Flower, there's not a chance in hell that any Slytherin would want to be led or taught by James Potter. I know that for a fact. We might as well throw Wormtail up there to teach them.'

Lily smiled softly. Out of all of the seventh year boys, Sirius was the one that she had grown the closest to so far this year. She'd resented him for his immaturity, especially now that she understood why the boys had stopped their pranks. In spite of her disappointment in Severus and their fractured relationship, sending someone to their doom via werewolf was not something that would even skip through her brain.

'Shall we go and say hello?' Sirius asked, noting Lily's absent conversation.

Lily nodded, 'Only a brief visit.'

'My dear, it can be as brief as you want it to be,' Sirius said comfortingly. 'And then, we can gallop through the grounds and distract ourselves. Sound good?'

Their visit only lasted a few minutes, Ashleigh's friends more than capable in bringing up her spirits. Sirius, of course, had given her his witty charm, telling her that he'd take her on the nicest date he could as soon as she was fit and healthy again. Ashleigh, having played on the Gryffindor Quidditch team over the past three years, was more than ready to dismiss him and tell him where he could shove his date. All in good humour, but with a distinct taste of seriousness.

Now, Sirius was grinning widely as they walked towards the Forbidden Forest, noting a large, familiar presence in the distance. The wind was cool against them, the autumn days getting shorter and the weather beginning to frost up the castle in the early morning hours.

'When was the last time you visited Hagrid?' Lily asked Sirius, the bearded giant waving at them. She noticed that he had sewn Sirius' spider to his overcoat, an enormous breach of fashion. She shuddered, remembering the spider from the Hogwarts Express earlier in the year. It was fake, but resembled the real thing with frightening accuracy.

Sirius hummed to himself, linking his arm in hers. 'Yesterday, actually. He often sees things that others would ignore, being a groundskeeper. We always go to him first if there's a mystery afoot.'

Lily giggled. 'Afoot? Sirius, I don't think that word suits you as well as you think it might. You sounds as ancient as my grandfather was.'

Sirius snorted. 'I am a master of the English language, Evans, and I would appreciate your appreciation.'

She rolled her eyes, walking across the bouncy grass as they approached Hagrid, who had begun to make his way towards them. The forest was dark behind him, gloomy and mysterious. She remembered her brief adventure into those woods with James, the encounter with the centaur. She remembered how she had been carried on James' back while he was in his stag form, how he had felt beneath her. Strong, powerful, and quick. He had been secure and safe. His pouncing through the trees had caused her to tremble upon him, gripping his neck tightly. She could feel the butterflies in her stomach even now, wishing she was back with him. She hadn't even considered telling Alice about the dreams she'd been having. They were so inappropriate she wasn't even sure she could revisit them. Each and every dream had included his pouncing and her trembling, though in a completely different manner.

'Hagrid!' Sirius exclaimed. 'What a treat it is to see you.'

Hagrid snorted, looking at Lily. 'You visited jus' yesterday, Black. It's this one I've been lookin' to chat to. How are you, Lily?'

Lily furrowed her brow. 'I'm okay?'

Hagrid moved closed. 'I only ask because Sirius here mentioned you were feeling blue. Fancy a cup o' tea?'

Lily looked at Sirius, who looked back at Hagrid completely unfazed. 'You got anything stronger?'

'Once again, Black, I was talking to Lily. You always manage to leave my cupboards empty.'

Lily smiled, but shook her head. 'We were just on a walk today, Hagrid. We've got to head back to the castle soon.'

Hagrid nodded sympathetically. 'Not to worry, Lily, my door is always open.' He looked at Sirius, 'Any update on your investigation, Sirius?'

Sirius shook his head, looking towards the forest. 'Nothing. No sign at all of an attack. I don't suppose you've heard anything else from the forest yet?'

'D'ya mean the centaurs?' Hagrid asked. 'If so, no. They're ignoring me at the moment. I've been in every nigh' to try and find somethin' for Dumbledore, but if the aurors can't find anything, I doubt we'll be able to.'

Sirius shrugged, eyes menacing with intent. 'We'll find something. We always do.'

'You boys are too much trouble,' Hagrid said. 'Don't you go gettin' yourself injured now, I can't be dealing with more bedridden Gryffindors, it ain't righ'.'

They smiled at him, both wishing him farewell as they drifted back up towards the castle. It was unlike Sirius to hold his tongue while he walked, usually as vocal as a small dog. However, he was quiet and contemplative, the second thing that Lily appreciated from him that day. Suddenly, he veered them towards the lake. The grounds were empty, the rest of the castle choosing the fires over the chilly weather. Without warning, they started to speed up.

'Sirius, where are we going?' Lily asked, looking back up towards the castle. It was interesting, she could see the tower that held the Head Boy and Girl dormitory, and yet there was no indication of a window. She supposed that the magic of the castle kept it hidden, just like Dumbledore had said.

'I fancy a swim,' he said with a grin. 'Want to get wet with me, Flower?'

She shuddered, 'Don't phrase it like that, Black. You have to be joking, it will be freezing in there!'

He waved her comment off as though it were an annoying fly. 'You're too proper, Lils,' he said. 'There's an image around you, an air of respectability, and I have to tell you that it grinds my teeth to no end. We need you to have some fun, I think.' He grinned wildly as they passed the enormous tree by the lake. 'And while I think that job will be taken as soon as you and James are an item, for now, I'm the perfect one to help.'

She slapped him playfully as he reached the edge of the lake. 'Sirius, we cannot go in there in this weather!'

He barked with laughter. 'Evans, you're a witch. If the cold bothers you that much, a simple wave of the wand will warm you up when you're done. Besides, I've been swimming here with every Gryffindor in our year except for you. This is a long overdue date.'

He dropped his heavy black cloak from his shoulders and immediately lifted his sweater over his head, tight lines on his stomach highlighting his athleticism. He winked, placing his hands on his waist and just above his trousers.

Lily immediately span away, focusing her attention on the only other figure on the horizon. Hagrid was wandering in the opposite direction, leaving the two of them alone. All of a sudden, she heard a splash behind her, and when she turned, Sirius was waist deep in the lake. She smiled, collecting his clothes and throwing them next to the tree.

'Oh Merlin, Evans,' Sirius exclaimed, almost peacefully, completely at ease. 'This is good. You should join me.'

Lily stood for a moment, watching him. The water did look enticing, and Sirius was the only person who could convince her to do something like this. Other than James, she thought to herself. If he had stripped, she wasn't so sure she would've turned away. Nor would she have let him get to the lake...

He dived under the water again, rising up with a heap of wet hair on his head. 'Evans,' he droned on, deciding to float on his back. 'Wash away your worries with me.'

She shook her head in disbelief. She was sure that even if any professor decided to come and interrupt them, Sirius would still lay floating with everything on display, acorn included. In fact, if McGonagall turned up, she was sure he'd try and display even more.

'You said every other Gryffindor has gone swimming with you?' Lily asked, suddenly noting the comment. 'Even Alice?'

Sirius laughed again, splashing as he drifted effortlessly. 'Especially Alice,' he said. 'You forget that we were all practically raised together. We may not always get along, but that's family for you. Prewett and I have swam here hundreds of times. Marlene and I, well, we enjoy -'

'I know what you enjoy with Marlene,' Lily said simply. She wasn't so foolish that she couldn't tell when Marlene had been off with Sirius. In fact, it was just last week that she was sure they had slept together again when Marlene had come running into the girls dormitory, clothes half discarded.

Finally, Lily sighed. 'Close your eyes, Black.'

Sirius whooped, diving beneath the water. Looking around once more, Lily shifted off her cloak, feeling the cool air almost instantly. It was late morning and still the sun had yet to pierce the clouds in the sky. She shook off the cold, pulling down her trousers and lifting off her top. She placed them next to Sirius' clothes, hearing him splutter as he rose from the depths.

'Salty,' she heard him cough, spluttering to himself.

'Very elegant,' she called to him, smiling to herself. 'Back down you go.'

He was turned away from her but still abided her request, falling beneath the water. Quickly, Lily stripped off her final pieces of clothing. She felt wild and free, her naked body standing there for a moment, unsure of what to do. Then, with an abrupt jump, she leapt into the lake, diving swiftly beneath the water to get used to the temperature. Shivers of goosebumps plastered her soft white skin. She needed some of Sirius' athleticism, some his muscles and strength. No one should be able to endure this cold.

Her head pierced the water and she gasped for air, Sirius watching her calmly. 'This is so cold,' she shivered, voice trembling.

Sirius nodded, leaning his head back once more. 'Breathe, Evans,' he smiled. 'Deep breaths.'

She turned away again, Sirius on full display. 'Sirius, you need to keep your bottom half underneath the water. What if someone -'

'It's the body I was born with, Evans,' he said simply. 'Now, the body that you were born with is an excellent one - and I mean that as a very good friend.'

She shook her head, the movement of her arms beginning to warm her as she treaded water. She felt the deep cold begin to leave her body, replaced with a tingling sensation, a soft awareness of the water and yet a dismissal of the temperature.

'I've a mind to slap you, Black,' she said to him as he bounced easily on the still lake.

He barked again, falling beneath the water and swimming towards her. 'Treat me like a girlfriend, Evans, you know my interests lay elsewhere.'

'You mean with James?' she joked. 'Or Remus?'

He snorted, 'Peter, actually. I like the admiration.'

She laughed with him. In fact, that was the first real laugh of the day. He was right, this did help. If anything, the water kept her focused on just the one thing - not freezing.

'See,' he said simply, glossy black eyes soft and calm. 'You've just got to jump in and embrace it.'

They treaded water for a moment, staring up at the castle. When Lily had first seen it, she had never wanted the majesty of the building to diminish. Even now, as she looked up and saw each and every detail in the cloudy morning, she was filled with awe.

'I'm going to miss Hogwarts, Sirius,' she said simply. 'I'll miss the magic, the rooms, the stairways. I'll miss the girls, I'll miss you boys - Merlin, if you haven't kept me busy over these last few years.'

He grinned. 'Hogwarts is only a feeling, Flower. Spend the winter with James and I, you'll see. You've never accepted an invitation to one of the Potter balls, but that can give you a glimpse of life after Hogwarts. Everyone was there last year, except yourself of course.'

She considered this. In fact, she was reluctant to share that it had been on her mind. James had told her about these balls quite a few times, and each time she had silently awaited an invitation. However, none had come yet.

'This is the year for it, then,' she said simply, staring up at the Gryffindor tower. She scanned the grounds, and still there was no presence of another student.

Sirius moved closer still, Lily kicking with her legs to stay above water and holding her hands to her chest. He laughed, shaking his head. 'I know I'm a teenager, Lils, but I have morals. I asked you to swim, and that's all that we're doing. Don't drown yourself protecting something that I'm not interested in, as soon as you're with James you'll be like a sister. I've always seen you that way.'

Lily didn't know why, but she believed him. Without any concern whatsoever, it was the most authentic thing Sirius had said to her in regard to their relationship.

'Thank you, Sirius,' she smiled, slightly breathless as she started using her hands to keep her afloat again.

'Besides,' he said, a grin forming on his lips, 'we both know that Marlene's boobs are -'

'Okay!' Lily said, blushing, 'I think it's time we get out now.'

Sirius barked, shaking his head as she told him to dive down once again.

A long shower later, Lily was dressed in her Gryffindor pyjamas and shrouded in a thick, heavy dressing gown. She'd done exactly as Sirius had recommended and warmed herself with magic just as they'd left the lake. However, in spite of a hot shower and the heavy clothing on her back, she was still cold. The freedom she had felt while swimming in the lake had slowly left her, a deep, hollow fear remaining. She was worried about her friends, her classmates, and all of those that were due to be targeted based on the family that they had been born into. Her mind kept taking her back to that evening in Diagon Alley, McGonagall fiercely fighting and protecting her students. They'd all had a stern talking to since then, with promises made that there would never be such an excursion again.

Now, Lily was opening the bedroom door of her private dormitory, the familiar voices of her friends in the common room below. She could hear Alice talking to Sirius and James, the crackle of the fire behind them. If anything could help her forget about her problems, it would be them. She tiptoed down the stairs, arriving to a cheer from Sirius.

'The mermaid returns,' he grinned, clothed in a loose white top and patchwork pyjama bottoms. 'Are you warm yet?'

James was smiling softly, staring into the fire. He was sat the closest to it. Perfect, Lily thought. She walked towards him and sat herself on some cushions beside the flames.

'I'm getting there,' she said, looking at Alice on the sofa. 'Did he tell you how cold that lake was?'

She snorted. 'I still can't believe you went in. You've changed, Lily Evans.'

Sirius echoed this sentiment, he and Alice diving into the topic with sudden ease. Lily ignored them, holding her hands to the flames.

'Are you warm?' James asked her softly, his glasses dismissed beside him. She hated when he didn't wear them. There was no veil between his eyes and hers when they weren't in use.

She nodded, smiling at him. Then, she faltered. 'I'm worried.'

He paused for a second, and then nodded. 'Me too. We've set a date for the first defence session.'

Alice and Sirius stopped their conversation, looking to James. 'You didn't mention that earlier,' Sirius said, feigning betrayal.

'I was waiting for Lily,' James response softly. 'I'd like you to run it with me.'

Lily could feel his eyes on her. 'I can't do that, it's you and Sirius that everyone admires.'

Alice expressed her dismissal of this thought with a single snort. 'As if. The golden girl Lily Evans has yet to be beaten in any exam, everyone knows who the student of the year is.'

Lily looked at James, expecting an immediate argument. We all know that I'm the top student of the year. No one can defeat me in a dual.

'I've never agreed with a comment more,' James said simply. 'We bring the practical experience, but we need you, Lily. You ground us, you make sure that we know which path is the right one. Behind Dumbledore, you're the only one with unquestionable morals. Us guys, we've made one too many people unhappy in our time here at Hogwarts. I don't think there's a single student who hasn't been effected by one of our pranks in the past.'

Lily considered this. She wanted to deny it, but she knew there was a truth there. If James were to run the defence club on his own, who could imagine the chaos that would follow.

'What date have you chosen?' she asked him.

'Tomorrow,' he said simply. 'Dumbledore has given me access to one of the large DADA classes. We'll start there. I've got around twenty students who want to come so far, including our social group.'

'So you have twelve,' Alice said. 'That seems a slim number?'

James nodded. 'But it's a start. I want to make sure that we know what we're doing before we invite the rest of the school.'

'Slytherin excluded,' Sirius noted, but was ignored.

Lily couldn't move her eyes away from James'. She could see his plea without a word needing to be said. Finally, she nodded. 'I think I can work with you, Potter.'

James leant back against the sofa that Alice was sitting on. 'That's all I ever wanted, Evans.' He turned to Sirius. 'I need to tell Remus and Peter that we're going ahead, they're in charge of communicating dates to the rest of the club.'

Sirius yawned, standing up with a stretch. Alice looked away, grimacing. 'Pull your pyjamas up, Sirius, that's far too much hair to show on a Saturday evening.'

Sirius flapped his hand at her. 'Grow up, Prewett. You're simply jealous.'

James laughed, and Lily smiled with him. The boys stood up and departed down the ladder and out of the dormitory, leaving Alice to join Lily by the fire, snuggling up against her. Lily relished the touch, comforted by her best friend.

'Are you okay?' Alice asked her.

'Everyone keeps asking me that,' Lily said, annoyed. 'Do I look upset?'

Alice eyeballed her. 'Do you want an honest answer, Lils?'

Lily sighed, the flames dancing within the fireplace. She knew she looked tired and she knew that the attacks were weighing her down. 'Out there in the lake with Sirius, that's the first time in two weeks that I've felt even remotely okay. He knew exactly what I needed.'

Alice smiled, placing her hands over Lily's. 'Sirius often does know how to distract people. He's had years - and I mean years - of practice. I think that lake is his happy place.' She paused. 'You need to talk to James.'

'James?' Lily asked her. It was so dark outside that the lake was lost in the night. 'Why?'

Alice smirked. 'Because if you're looking to distract yourself, there is no better person to do it with that the one you love.'

Lily rolled her eyes. 'I don't think it's love, Alice. It feels more like seven years of torment. I'm not sure what it is.'

'Lily, I love you. Mary loves you, as does Marlene. Remus and Sirius love you. Even Peter does, in his own way.'

Lily snorted. 'He's funny, isn't he.'

Alice nodded. 'Definitely. But do you know who would give his life for you before anyone else even has the opportunity? Do you know who would leap at the chance to get you in that lake and make you feel as happy as Sirius did?' she held her hand up, waiting for an answer.

'James,' Lily whispered. 'But he's still not happy with me. He's still distant.'

Alice stretched, laying across Lily's lap. 'He's chased you for seven years, Lily. Don't you think it's time you returned the feeling? He needs to know that you want him as much as he's wanted you. You can't expect to ask him to mature, and then when he does be frustrated that he shows every single sign of maturity?'

'You're saying I'm immature now, then?' Lily asked, flushing.

'No, Lily,' Alice said, sitting up with a firm finality. 'I'm saying that he needs acknowledgement. He needs to know that you want him in your life, and not just as a friend.'

Lily considered this, hugging her knees while Alice watched her. It was true, now that he had stopped chasing, what signs had she really given him? Kissing him had likely confused him. Wearing skimpy clothing was an invitation for him to show that he was mature. Why hadn't she just talked to him yet?

'Or,' Alice said with a giggle at her lips, 'you can go swimming with Sirius again. We've all seen him naked, I'm sure he'd be more than willing to share that with you again.'

Lily paused, and then she laughed with her. 'He really doesn't mind showing off, does he?'

'What has he got to lose?' Alice asked her. 'He's been so open since he started Hogwarts that no one can make any judgement that hasn't been made already. Despite everything he's ever done, he's still the most popular and gorgeous boy at Hogwarts.'

'Second most,' Lily said quietly.

'That's my girl,' Alice said, smiling. 'Now take your top off and wait for him in his room.'

Lily slapped Alice playfully, feeling much better than she had earlier. 'Thanks, Alice.'

'Anything for you, Lils,' she said, squeezing Lily's arm.

~ Author's Note ~

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