Title: Inside Out
Rating: NC-17
Word Count: 11.6k
Summary: Santana's back from Indiana for Senior year. She lived here five years ago, but there's something different about the place.
Warning: G!P
Notes: I want to finish up this fic, as I started a new one and it's very different, but I like it. Don't want to let anyone down, and this is the one that's closest to the end. I do have a Locksmith update, but it needs a few tweaks.
/
"Mom dated Rick Pierce?"
Santana can't believe it.
She's been sat at the kitchen table for the past hour, listening to her dad rehash his teenage years, starting from when he was 15 and going into high school.
Just like Santana, he went to McKinley Middle School, then McKinley High and apparently made quite an impression during his time there. He was always popular, effortlessly so and Rick wasn't so much. He always tried too hard, joined every club he could go to and attempted to make connections that he thought would benefit him; like being a total ass lick towards faculty members and the jocks, but obviously he never succeeded and wound up with a less than positive reputation.
It wasn't like they were mortal enemies or anything, but when Santana hears that her mom dated Rick back in the day, she's stunned. She never saw that coming and as she processes the words that have just left her dads mouth, all she can do is stare as she tries to get it to sink in, but all it's doing is conjure up thousands of questions. How old were they? How long were they together? How does Santana fit into this, seeing as her parents had her when they were barely legal?
There are far too many to ask, and she thinks even if she managed to find her voice, she wouldn't know which one to go with first.
Luckily, her dad sees it though, pinching his lips together and bobbing his head as he stares back at her. "For a while," he confirms and takes a swig of his beer, settling it down softly on the tabletop. "I never understood what she saw in him, but me and your mom were friends at the time, so as far as I was concerned, if she was happy, then so was I," he throws in a shrug, but Santana just narrows her eyes. Her parents were purely platonic at one stage?
"You were just friends?"
"It's where all relationships start out when you're a kid," he lifts his shoulder and leans back into his chair, arm resting on the back of it. "We met in Freshman year and grew up together and when the Summer before Senior year came around, something changed." His eyes begin clouding over, like he's playing back the memory and Santana's seen him do it so many times over the years when they've spoken about her mom, but he always forces himself to snap out of it and change the subject. Not this time though.
"I always knew she was special, but we started having these weird moments when both of knew it was wrong," he laughs a little, which makes her laugh too but she just smiles softly afterwards to encourage him. It sounds a little too akin to her own relationship. "Rick never liked me and didn't try to hide it," he states, his voice stronger now and his eyes focus on his hand, spinning the beer bottle. "Apparently he always knew I would try and take her away from him but that's where he was wrong."
Older brown eyes flash to her, and Santana jerks back, sitting up a little straighter because she feels like it's getting more serious.
"Because your mom wasn't mine to take away. She was always her strong, fiercely independent self that didn't belong to anyone and so I couldn't take her away... But for some reason, she wanted me instead of him and he hated me for it," he sighs, and Santana can hear the sadness creeping in. Maybe that's why she left in the end. She still doesn't really know the whole story, but she feels like there's a couple of gaps being filled in. Then he's moving, sitting forward again, and resting his elbow on the table, leaning towards her. "Your mom broke up with Rick and then she fell pregnant with you after we drank too much at a party."
He waves his hand and tries to play it off, but now she's beginning to understand why he's always so protective of her, and why he felt so strongly about talking to her when she was caught buying whipped cream and condoms with Dani. At least she had the consideration to use protection. He apparently didn't.
"But Rick always blamed me for the breakdown of their relationship, and without your mom, his rep just went further south," Diego takes another long swig of his beer, finishing it off and climbing to his feet, reaching over to pat her on the shoulder. "He thought I was persuading her to be with me instead of him and always hated how close we were, even though I wasn't trying to pursue your mom," he shrugs "I can only imagine he feels the same way towards you, seeing as you're my kid and all," he laughs and Santana does too, but hers is weak due to her mind spinning with thoughts. "He probably feels like you're taking Brittany away from him, even though it's her choice."
And there it is.
That's why Rick doesn't like her. That's why Rick doesn't want her dating Brittany, because he's holding some pathetic grudge over losing his girlfriend as a teenager to someone who was better for her, healthier for her. He thinks that Santana's going to take Brittany away from him, and he can't hack having another Lopez doing that to him but it's his freaking fault that her mom looked elsewhere. Clearly her parents had a better connection, with a stable foundation of friendship to back it up and now she's starting to realise why her dad has been so hurt all these years.
He didn't just lose his partner when her mom left… He lost his best friend.
But she's seen the pictures. She knows what her mom looks like and she's the spitting image, so she's not surprised that this seems to answer a lot of the questions swirling about inside her mind. Rick can see her mom in her when he looks at her. Rick is reminded of everything he lost when he sees Santana, and if anything, that's only making her feel more confident about her and Brittany's relationship because she's not her mom.
She's still here. She didn't abandon her dad and their young child. She wouldn't ever do anything as shitty as her mom did, and having this explained makes he want to push Rick's buttons anymore.
Not if it hurts Brittany though. She won't do that and give Rick the satisfaction of knowing that a Lopez has hurt another Pierce.
"So, maybe next time when he decides to corner you without me there," Diego shouts from across the room, now stood in the kitchen and fetching two beers out the fridge, kicking the door shut before twisting off the tops of them, caps tossed to the side. "You can throw a bit of history his way and remind him that messing with a Lopez never ends well."
That perks Santana's interest even further, because as much as she knows the anger she can see in her dad's eyes is from hearing her side of the story, she knows there's something else there, too. "Did you two ever fight?"
"We got close," he replies and comes back over, taking his seat once more and sliding her over a beer, winking at her. "But lucky for him, I never hit him," he laughs, and Santana does, too. She'd pay good money to see that. "Would love the opportunity to though, so let me know next time when he's near you, yeah? Nearly floored the guy when I found you two outside the shop."
Santana laughs louder, grabbing the beer and taking a long pull, feeling the liquid cool her stomach immediately. She's not a huge fan of beer, but at her age, alcohol is alcohol and after tonight, she could really use it. "I'll see what I can do."
Diego lifts his beer, gesturing for her to tip the top of it against and she does so. "And keep being you, kiddo," he adds on. "The Lopez charm always works, and you've got a good heart. You're not doing anything wrong."
She just smiles.
/
It's not until Monday at school that Santana gets to see Brittany again.
Apparently, Rick had her on house lockdown over the weekend, wanting her to catch up with assignments and apply for colleges she doesn't want to go to. But thank God his power doesn't stretch as far as the school or its parking lot and she waits, leaning against the side of her truck, staring at her phone as the clock as hits 8am. Her eyes flash up, and right on time, there's a black SUV rolling in and pulling up in the space beside her and she holds her breath as the blonde climbs out, blue orbs instantly meeting brown.
And just like that, Santana can breathe again. Seeing as they've only managed to sneak a few texts, she hasn't had enough of her dose of Brittany and she fucking hates that no-one knows about them – or so she hopes, she's not sure what Sam might have said and to who – so she can't kiss her in lieu of a greeting. Instead, she has to hook her thumbs through the strap of her backpack and drop focus to the gravel beneath her feet as her girlfriend comes over as her heart begins picking up speed.
She's not allowed to kiss her, especially as there are now several Cheerios clambering out their too expensive cars and looking their way.
"Hey," Brittany says, and brown eyes flicker back up to see a breathy smile on the blondes face. It instantly makes her relax. She thought there might be some lingering awkwardness after the way they left things at Lima Point, even if they've spoken since then but she knows now there isn't. Another thing to thank God for.
"Hey," she replies and bites her lip when her vision drops to Brittany's. She really wants to kiss her. She hasn't been able to in over 48 hours and the need is now surging through her body, and she wishes she snuck out during the night and had a secret midnight meeting with the girl so she could at least get a hit.
"I've missed you."
She breathes out heavily again, that need only burning hotter. "I've missed you," she blushes and clears her throat when Brittany's eyebrow quirks at her and her doe eyes momentarily turn into devil ones. "Don't do that, or I'll have to drag you into the back of your car," she warns with a grin.
The blonde doesn't even flinch. "We've christened your truck… About time we do mine," she winks and the blood drops into Santana's groin, beginning to curdle.
But school is so not the place to get hot and heavy, especially at the minute even though they've fooled around in several different storage closets and empty classrooms, so she ignores it and rolls her eyes, starting to walk towards school and the blonde follows her. Their hands bump in the space between them, but due to lingering eyes, she pushes back the urge to hold her hand and begins thinking of ways to make up for it. It's not like Brittany's grounded – she's 18 – but it's going to be difficult for them to see each other with Rick having eyes everywhere.
Maybe the midnight sneak out is a good idea.
"You're an ass," she says, but there's amusement lacing her tone and Brittany bumps their shoulders together as they head into school.
/
They go straight to the library, finding Quinn and Puck there and for a second, Santana considers teasing him as this is so not where she would've found him the other side of six months ago. At this time in the morning, he used to be acting like a gorilla in the parking lot with his idiot friends, but now he's got his head in a book, next to his tutor girlfriend and Santana can only smile as she wanders up to them.
Quinn sees her first, hazel eyes flashing with concern and Santana just bobs her head, silently telling her that all is currently okay. Over the weekend, she met up with her friend and told her everything that happened, which earned a flick in the ear when the blonde found out she turned up to prom and didn't even bother saying hello to her, but there was no further flicks when Santana got to the end of the story and explained her side.
It was all understood after that, but Santana voiced how worried she was about seeing Brittany. She knew she would be able to tell in a second, just by looking into blue eyes, if it was going to harm their relationship.
"Lezpez," Puck chants as they sit down, bags thrown on the table. Quinn clicks her tongue, but Santana just laughs. He hasn't called her that in a long time. "Shocked you're still breathing after the Rick Pierce standoff."
Santana frowns, vision flitting to Quinn who pulls her side of her mouth down in an apologetic smile. She told him about what happened. "Do you have to tell him everything?"
"San," Brittany warns, finding her hand beneath the table and the frustration sizzles out. It's kind of annoying, especially when Quinn smirks at her and quirks a brow. "No-one else knows, so that's all that matters."
It's the first time Brittany's said anything regarding the events of the weekend, and she turns her head to look at her girlfriend, small sparks of nerves flaring up her spine. The walk to the library was filled with putting all energy into not gazing adoringly into each other's eyes and finding the strength not to make use of the janitors closet that's been valuable to them over the past week, so they haven't quite had enough time together to talk about it, but she guesses they're doing that now.
"Sam didn't say anything?" Quinn asks, and that's where Santana was going. If anyone was going to reveal their relationship, the sticky situation up at Lima Point and put information that they've tried to keep concealed out there, it was going to be him. He did try to escort Brittany back to her dad's car and was very obviously on Rick's side with the whole thing and sure enough, that'd be an easy way to ruin their relationship, starting with their high school reputation.
"No, I spoke to him," Brittany shrugs but Santana's instantly suspicious. The guy was all over her, and sure, the blonde made it clear that she isn't into him like that but he still freaking lives with her and so that pretty much solidifies that things won't change on his side. How could they when he's going to school and living with someone he so obviously has a thing for? Especially when that person is Brittany. She's everything anyone could want.
"He said that my dad made him go with him to Lima Point," she continues, blue eyes flitting around to each person at the table before coming back to Santana's. "He was just trying to make the situation better but obviously it didn't go that way."
It's not fooling Santana. She knows exactly what Sam's like based off the interactions she's had with him, and the fact he not only tried to stop her from saving Brittany, but also tried to grab Brittany twice, just goes to show how ridiculous that excuse is and how little brain cells he has. Brittany's a better person than she is though, always wanting to see the best in people but Santana likes to think of herself as a realist. People are always out for themselves, and no insane explanation is going to change that, especially when Trouty Mouth drools every time he's around the blonde.
She really doesn't like him.
"Sam's not a bad guy so I can see that," Puck chimes in, playing with the pen in his hand and tapping it against the top, but it just makes Santana scowl. Now he's friends with the guy?
"He's into Brittany and sided with Rick when Santana could've used the back up," Quinn deadpans, and Santana's glad she replied before she kicked him in the shin beneath the table. She thought they were friends and could really do with him lying, if that's what he really believes. "That doesn't exactly tell me he's a good guy, Puck."
"What was he supposed to do?" Puck shakes his head, eyes wide and looks back to Brittany. "He lives with them, and he's got his brother and sister to think about," he shrugs and sweeps his hand out towards Brittany who pinches her lip up at the side, almost like she's already there with him in her head. "And remember we dated," he gestures again between him and the blonde and Santana and Quinn both scowl fiercely. That's so not a reminder either of them need. "I know Rick and that asshole likes to get his way and use every available resource to do it."
Brittany hums, Quinn scowls more and Santana slumps back into her chair, feeling the hand on hers squeeze gently. She looks back to her girlfriend, finding apologetic eyes on her and she wants to see where Puck is coming from – she wants to believe that Sam isn't an asshole too – but all signs point towards that. It's blaringly obvious how he feels about Brittany, he'd be dumb if he didn't feel that way, so naturally she's going to have her back up and she's still not forgotten about how scared Brittany was when they were caught in their spot.
So that's what she goes on. "But you were scared, Britt. Sam didn't help you. He just wanted you to get in your dads car."
"I was scared because my dad told me if I kept seeing you then he'd make sure I'd go to Washington with him," she explains and Santana's heart stops, but then Brittany's scooting closer, probably too close to come across as just friends and steals a quick glance around the library, finding it relatively empty before she turns back, urging Santana's chin up with a single finger of her free hand. "But like I told you before, I'm an adult and there aren't any prospects there for me," she shrugs but it doesn't quell the concern. The thought of being away from the blonde makes Santana want to be sick. "I'm not sure what I want to do, but I know whatever it is, I want to be with you."
A smile begins tugging at the corner of Santana's mouth. She just can't take it when Brittany says shit like that because it turns her into a pathetic mess and her stomach starts flipping so hard she could throw up from that now instead, the urge to kiss her coming back in full force. The blonde sees it though, smirking lightly before leaning back and out of her personal bubble and Santana ignores the urge to just kiss her anyway as they just stare at each other grinning.
As far as she knows, Dani still has no clue about them and that's just another problem they've got to deal with, so kissing her in front of a few students who will no doubt whisper it through the school halls isn't the way to go.
"You guys are disgustingly cute, you know," Quinn comments and Santana snaps her head around, eyes narrowed.
"Shut up, Fabray."
Puck laughs throatily and his girlfriend lifts her hands beside her head. "You really gotta work on hiding it though," Quinn says as she gets to her feet, packing up her things and throwing Santana a look. "If Sam does decide to open his ridiculously large mouth, there's no way you two will be able to deny it," she shrugs and throws her bag over her shoulder, glancing back to her boyfriend. "Me and Santana have math first period, so meet you at lunch?"
He grins and Santana looks away as they go to kiss goodbye, turning her attention back to Brittany. She won't lie, she's jealous as hell that those two got away so easily with their relationship as it's far more controversial than theirs, but she's happy for them. Maybe one day her and Brittany can get there, where they can kiss goodbye and won't have Rick fucking Pierce breathing down their necks, or any fucking Cheerios hating on them and both parties trying to do everything to keep them apart.
"I can handle my dad," Brittany picks up where she left off with their conversation and reaches for her bag again. "But he's not coming between us, I promise, okay?"
Having full trust in the blonde, Santana nods and the bell rings around them, signalling the start of the school day. She grabs her things too, shrugging her backpack over her shoulder and stands there, looking around and waiting until all the students begin filing out the door before she steps up to Brittany and grabs her hand, squeezing it gently and looking deeply into her eyes. She may not be able to kiss her, but she'll touch her at any available moment just to get a top up of what she needs.
"Okay, Britt," she finally breathes and licks her lip, using all strength into not leaning over just for a peck. "I just don't want to come between you and your family. It's not right."
"No it wouldn't be," the blonde agrees, but there's something in her eyes that stops Santana's heart from falling into her stomach as she ducks her head and bites her lip. "But you're not coming between us," she lifts a shoulder. "If anyone is, it's my dad... He's just an asshole."
Santana grins widely, letting out a laugh as she rolls her eyes and swats at her girlfriends arm before Quinn and Puck round the table to join them as they leave for first period.
It doesn't quell all her concerns, but for now it's good enough.
/
Brittany sends Santana text during math to tell her that Dani, Kitty and Bree are all asking questions about Rick turning up at the party.
She doesn't say what they are specifically, but enough that she won't be able to sit with Santana today at lunch, which is totally disheartening but she can handle it. To hide their relationship, they're going to have to do shit like this – more so now than ever after the whole Daddy Pierce bullshit – and yeah, it's tedious and irritating and gets an empathetic head tilt from Quinn when Santana tells her which just makes her roll her eyes and scoff, but if it means she gets Brittany, then she'll learn to deal with it.
Having Brittany in any capacity is better than not having any of her.
Anyway, she heads outside with Quinn and finds a table, throwing their bags down after grabbing some lunch and it only takes a few minutes for Puck to come out, a hell of a lot happier than he was when they first saw him. It causes confusion, and a shared look between the two girls but he seems on top of the world as he high fives some of the jocks and comes over – against the advice not to being yelled at him by said jocks – and sits down, kissing the blonde on the cheek before sitting down beside her.
He doesn't say anything immediately, so Santana decides to take the lead. "Why are you so freaking happy?"
Puck laughs and grabs a chip from the packet laid out in front of his girlfriend. "Guess who just got back his quarterback title," he waggles his eyebrows and Quinn gasps, Santana's mouth drops open, and Puck bobs his head proudly, trying to seem like it's not effecting him, but it obviously is. The only times he usually smiles that wide is when Quinn says something sappy as hell to him and so far, they've just said hello to each other.
Still, Santana's strangely proud of him, affection rising in her chest, and she clicks her tongue but smiles, reaching over to bat him in the arm after Quinn hangs on the other, bouncing in her spot. "That's awesome Puck," she says but eyes his chest, like she's trying to see through to his back where he was shot. "You sure you're up for it?"
"Yeah, I've been running practise a couple days a week with Sam after school," he announces, and the smile drops from Santana's face as she grabs her lunch from her bag, pausing mid-air.
"Really? Sam?"
Puck presses his lips together and shrugs. "He can't be that bad if he's helping me get back to the position he's currently playing."
"We are so not doing this again," Quinn interrupts and waves her hand between them as the tension begins rising but Santana can't help but glare.
It's a good point, but she doesn't want to accept it.
Her and Puck have managed to build up a friendship, and she hasn't forgiven him for all the bullshit he put her through in middle and high school, so it's hard to just get over something like this. She still has her reservations about the guy, more so with the whole dating Quinn controversy and knowing he thinks Sam is a good guy whilst he's chasing Brittany, helping Rick, and is now holding the prom king title which just pisses her off that little bit more, just reinforces all her concerns about him. If he thinks that's okay, what else does he think is okay?
But she doesn't voice it. Mostly because Quinn kicks her under the table when she opens her mouth to.
"What does that mean then?"
Brown eyes flash to the blonde who asked, and Puck grins widely at her, eyes shining adoringly. "I'm playing my first game next week, after the pep rally."
Oh good. Another high school celebration that will probably end in flames. Santana can't wait to go.
"That's next week?" Quinn answers and bobs her head, but she turns her attention to Santana who's making a point to look away, seeming disinterested by it. She isn't, but she kind of is. Prom was like, the fourth time she's gone against her gut instinct only to end up with it biting her in the ass. She can't imagine the pep rally is going to go any different and if she meets her best friends eyes, she knows she's going to get asked if she wants to go.
"Yeah," Puck replies and begins talking about how well they did in practise, but Santana's mind wanders as she peers over to the football field to see the first Cheerios come out from the side.
The red and white skirts flap in the wind, and she remembers the time where she used to look at every pair of legs in them, but now her eyes are searching for a specific pair and her heart leaps into her throat when they do, Brittany coming out with Kitty, Dani, and Bree beside her. It quickly changes the emotion in her chest, fear gripping it instead and just before she looks away, blue eyes flicker her way, holding them for a second and she manages to find it in herself to chill. Brittany's not ignoring her, and biting her lip whilst her friends look away and maybe if they can still do shit like this, even at the pep rally, she might think about going.
They're gone quicker than she wants, and she returns her attention back to the table to find Quinn staring her way with a raised eyebrow.
What did she miss?
"What?"
"I asked if you were coming," Quinn repeats, her voice deadpan and expression matching.
Santana blinks herself out of it and nods. "Uh, yeah, sure," she says and sucks her lips into her mouth. "But if there's even a hint of drama, I'm out."
"Great," the blonde beams a smile, but there's something in her eyes that Santana notices when Quinn turns that smile into a smirk. Shit. What did she just say yes to? She thought they were talking about the pep rally. "We can take your truck seeing as you've got the most room."
A frown appears on her face. "Most room?"
"Can't go camping without a tent," Quinn throws back at her, and Santana's now entirely confused. Weren't they talking about the game?
"What tent?"
"For camping at the lake," Puck chimes in and smirks at her, too. Those bastards knew she wasn't listening. "This weekend, we're all going," he explains further when a less than amused pulls over her face. "So it was really nice of you to offer up your truck as a storage horse, Lezpez," he reaches across the table and jabs her in the arm.
She dodges it, scowling fiercely and can't help but glance across the field to the Cheerios again, finding blue eyes already on her, a question running through her mind because there's no point in fighting her friends. They've already made up their mind and Quinn will drag her there by the hair if she has to. Still though, the pep rally was bad enough, let alone camping at a lake and she hasn't even asked who's going, but she knows it's probably a celebration for Puck seeing as he's still top of the pile somehow and that means there's a very specific group that would be invited and now she's beginning to panic.
Especially when she sees Dani look her way, catching Brittany staring over her shoulder and Santana almost chokes on her bite of apple, forcing herself to look away. Dani's been strangely quiet, considering she was the one that told Rick where Brittany might be, and she dated the girl… She knows that Dani always wants to find out what the latest gossip is, and being in her position, it's quite easy to do so and so it's weird that Santana's managed to get to lunch time without one of the devil twins approaching her after the shit they pulled at prom and the whole Brittany thing being revealed to the school.
But silence is good, at least for now, and she really doesn't want to jinx it by considering there might be something else being planned behind her back. It's hard enough trying to keep her and Brittany's relationship going when they can't act on it. Staring at the girl across the field only takes her so far but she feels like a tone is being set this week, and it freaking sucks but it's something she'll have to adjust to.
Brittany's still hers, and so that alone is something to celebrate, so she looks back to her friends who are eagerly awaiting some sort of response from her, both of them with hopeful smiles on their faces and she rolls her eyes. "Fine," she hisses and takes another bite of her apple, sticking a finger out to point at them. "But you two are paying for gas and putting up my tent as a thanks."
Quinn rolls her eyes; Puck laughs and Santana grins.
/
Santana's dad is at work when she gets back from school.
The sun is hot, and she thinks about doing her assignments but then again, if she's going to the lake at the weekend she could do with topping up her tan beforehand and so she decides to forgo homework in favour of going for a swim and a sunbathe. Since being in Ohio, she's barely used the pool and she changes into her bikini top and shorts, taking a towel with her and laying it out on the grass.
Thanks to her heritage, she doesn't burn too quickly so she doesn't bother with the sun lotion and slips straight into the water, ducking her head beneath and running her fingers through dark locks when she comes back up for air. She's always loved swimming, even as a kid – her dad used to call her a water bug – and so she does a couple lengths before pulling the swim lounger into the pool and lifting herself up on it, picking her sunglasses off the top and putting them over her face.
She lays back, enjoying the warmth that spreads over her skin and smiles to herself, beginning to hum a song she heard on the radio in the car ride back, but she nearly falls off the damn thing when she hears a giggle, her arms and legs flailing about and chest seizing. Her neck clicks when she snaps it to the side, eyes landing on legs that make them bug out of her head, but she's totally freaked out because she was so caught up in sunbathing she didn't realise Brittany had walked into her backyard.
"Fuck," she curses and joins in with the giggle when she looks up and finds the widest grin on her girlfriend's face. "You scared the hell out of me."
"Maybe you should check your phone more often then," Brittany shoots back, affection lacing her tone and she drops her bag on the ground, untying her laces as she begins removing her shoes. It's done quickly, and she sits down on the edge of the pool, dipping her legs into the water and kicks about, and Santana watches in awe for a few seconds before realising they're not around anyone, so it's a great time to top up on her drug.
She slides off the lounger, going underwater for a long second before coming back up and Brittany's mouth drops open when she comes back up, shaking her head like a dog and she frowns. "What?"
"You–" Brittany gulps loudly and narrows those blue eyes that are considerably darker than they were a second ago. "You're just really hot," she states, trying to play it off but Santana just smirks, heat scorching over her skin.
Instead of replying immediately, she wades over to the pool, pushing open long legs and steps between them, hands coming up to rest on the top of Brittany's knees as this isn't the shallow end so she's a couple inches short, but she doesn't care. Brittany's now peering down at her, leaning back on her hands and biting her lip and Santana's incredibly aware she barely saw the girl today. Sure, there were a few stolen looks, but they didn't have class together and the Cheer-bitches were hovering around her like a bad smell, so they couldn't even talk.
But she's here now, and they're alone and life is always so much better like this.
"Where's your dad?"
Santana looks into blue eyes. "He's still at work," she replies and traces a finger up the skin of the blondes thighs. "You coming in?"
"I don't have a bikini with me," Brittany pouts but it just causes a lightbulb to switch on inside Santana's mind, which apparently shows in her face as she just drags her vision up the red and white uniform and a finger tips her chin up until she can look back into blue eyes. "How long is he gone for?"
A grin spreads across Santana's face and she knows what Brittany's getting at. "Long enough," she breathes, unable to stop her throat from thickening because her girlfriend is giving her the eye and she's spent the last 30 hours not touching her, not being able to and instead being reminded of all the reasons why she shouldn't be. Not that there are any legitimate ones, but apparently to other people there are and so that's kind of sucked.
Not now though.
"Awesome," Brittany beams, pulling her legs out the water and climbing to her feet, instantly unzipping her uniform, and slipping out of it until she's just in underwear, revealing perfect abs and skin so soft Santana wants to touch every part of her.
Not only is Brittany beautiful, but she's like supremely attractive in every way possible. It still amazes Santana that she's actually hers, that she can kiss every part of her and get it in return, and she's so caught up in thinking about how much she just wants to appreciate her girlfriend that she doesn't realise the blonde is slipping into the pool in front of her until there are arms wrapping around her neck and legs winding around her waist.
"Hey," Brittany breathes, and Santana twirls them around in the water, her hands going instantly to the blondes thighs to hold her against her as Brittany pushes back a lock of damp hair behind her ear, revealing her face more.
"Hi," she exhales, leaning in and pressing their lips together. It's just a simple kiss, but it flows through her body, relaxing her muscles, warming her veins, and making all the shit just wash off her shoulders and she can't help but hum against Brittany's mouth, melting into her body as they wade into the middle of the pool. She never knew kissing someone could make her feel like this, but she guesses she was just kissing the wrong people.
"I've missed you," Brittany sighs against her lips, pulling back for a brief second before kissing her again and Santana would reply and point out that she's already told her that today, but then her girlfriend is deepening the kiss and there's a tongue sliding into her mouth and well, she's good.
So, she lets it go on for a few long moments, enjoying the way her body is spreading with heat now that isn't from the sun and Brittany flutters her lashes when it eventually breaks, their foreheads tipping together.
"I missed you more," Santana finally gets out, her voice husky and low and the fingers in her hair tighten as she tries to ignore the throbbing low in her groin. As much as she wants to get down and dirty, she really has missed spending time with the blonde and she thinks Brittany feels the same as she doesn't kiss her again, instead just stares deeply into her eyes and then Santana remembers about the plans set up for this weekend, eager to see if they'll be spending it together.
So she reels back more, putting a safe distance between them and clears her throat. "So, Puck was talking about going to the lake this weekend."
Brittany stares for a beat longer, getting distracted with the way Santana's looking at her, but shakes out of it and frowns. It makes Santana smile. She's just so damn cute. "Are you going?"
"Well, yeah," Santana shrugs, suddenly feeling less excited for being allowed to see Brittany without her dad knowing – he doesn't have to know who's invited – and more like she's intruding which just makes her uncomfortable. "I mean, if you don't want me to–"
"I do," the blonde cuts in, nodding her head to confirm her words and she's showing how honest she's being in her eyes. It makes the discomfort seep away in Santana's chest. "I just didn't know if you'd want to."
"Why wouldn't I want to?"
Brittany sucks her lips into her mouth and looks away, down to the water splashing up against their bodies. "Dani and Sam are going," she whispers, and Santana strokes her nose against her forehead to get her to look up again, and as much as she doesn't like that – it means they can't be like this – at least she gets to be in a situation where they can at least talk in public and that's better than how today went, so she's game.
Although she does remember Quinn saying they need to work on hiding how they feel about each other, which is just another struggle, but they can do it.
"Then we'll just have to try and stay away from each other," she replies, trying to seem nonchalant but she knows it's easier said than done. "I mean, we can still talk and stuff," she suggests but Brittany just keeps looking at her with a sad smile. "Has Dani said anything to you about your dad and what happened after he left the party?"
The blonde shakes her head and chews on her bottom lip. "No, but I told her he found me up at Lima Point," she answers and for a second, Santana's scared, but the blonde sees it and strokes the back of her hand down her cheek, calming her with the motion. "Just left out the you part of it," she adds on, and the fear settles once more, but it strikes back quickly when the next few words follow. "But I was thinking about telling her about us soon and wanted to talk to you about it, which is why I came over."
And Santana wants to play it cool. It's been a long time coming with Dani eventually finding out, and Santana can still hear the echo of Rachel, when she was lying in the hospital bed with a bullet in her shoulder, telling her how bad it'd be if Dani figured it out. Shit, she's even thought about it and still doesn't really know how she doesn't, but she knows that this inevitable, but it doesn't mean she's ready for it.
They're already going through shit with Rick, but she supposes this is Brittany's to take as Dani is supposed to be her best friend, and dating their ex is heavily against girl code, but if she's ready to do it, then Santana will be, too. She stood there and took Rick calling her a piece of trash repeatedly, so Dani doesn't exactly seem like the biggest fight they're going to have and really, it is about time.
If Dani knows, then the school will know, and then perhaps Santana can use the time they have together wisely, when they're allowed to see each other at school and kiss her like she wanted, just because.
So she inhales deeply and pushes a smile to her face, exhaling heavily out a response. "Okay… You can do it and we'll get through it together."
"Yeah?"
"Yeah," she says, and blue eyes sparkle back at her. "I think it'll be easier to get everything done at once and we can handle whatever happens as long as we're together," she continues, referring to the situation with Rick which makes Brittany's eyes drop, but she just swoops in and kisses her quickly before pulling back to look into them. "Then hopefully it'll be smooth sailing after that and we can just be," her hands squeeze at Brittany's thighs. "Like this."
"Like this, huh?" Brittany bites her bottom lip through a smile and Santana melts inside, but still bobs her head and laughs, her body vibrating against the blondes. She instantly regrets it though, feeling the effects of her incredibly attractive girlfriend being half naked and pressed up against her, and groans loudly, unable to stop her body from responding when her hips push forward and heat pools low in her groin.
"Maybe not exactly like this," she staggers out, swallowing thickly when Brittany's fingertips dance down the side of her neck, stroking over her collarbones. There's no way she can touch Brittany without making it very obvious how well she knows her body. "And maybe you should wait until after this weekend to talk to Dani," she follows up, thinking of going swimming in the lake and being able to touch Brittany in public will only lead to other things that would not only be disrespectful, but a huge neon sign showing they've had sex several times and oh yeah, are dating, too. "Not sure I can handle you in a bikini in public just yet. Don't think I have that much control."
Brittany throws her head back laughing, and Santana twists them around, backing her up into the edge of the pool, her hands coming up from strong thighs to grip on to the side and then the atmosphere shifts. She didn't actually mean it to, but it seems she wasn't the only one feeling the effects of being those close to each other, with this little clothing on, because blue eyes narrow, turn a shade darker and then Brittany's fucking smirking at her in a way that makes her jaw drop and eyes bulge.
"I think I'm gonna have to agree," the blonde says, lowering her face again until their lips are ghosting, Santana's eyes fluttering shut when warm breath coats her chin. "But I'm gonna have to sneak into your tent," she adds on, giggling darkly as her fingers come up to play with the hairs at the back of Santana's neck, getting tangled there. For her part, Santana drops her hands from the edge of the pool and to the blondes hips, hands playing with the side of her underwear. "No way I'm staying away from you for the whole weekend."
Borderline heart attack, Santana bobs her head aggressively and doesn't even bother responding as she presses their lips together, and her body simultaneously pushes the blondes back into the edge of the pool, but just as she's stroke her tongue inside her girlfriends mouth, Brittany's reeling back again and using the grip she has on her head to urge their eyes back together, despite the grunting objection that Santana makes.
"Feel free to lose control right now though," she ushers, like it wasn't obvious where they were heading anyway.
Santana does as she's told and moves her hand between Brittany's thighs, biting down on her bottom lip when she strokes through wet heat.
/
Apparently, camping near the lake is a tradition.
Having not been in Ohio for all of her teenage years, Santana didn't know that and becomes uneasy when she's driving in her truck, Quinn, and Puck beside her as they're all crammed into the two seated cab. Her friends try to tell her it's not a big thing, and not to worry, but she can only go off what she's experienced, and house parties are sort of a tradition – happening any available weekend – and they never end up going well, but she's going to try and have a good time.
That thought is quickly challenged when she pulls up into a small opening, finding several large cars and some fellow students, all stood around with bags by their feet and obviously, because Quinn couldn't decide on how many pairs of shoes to take, they're the last ones. It means that all eyes are on them as they park the truck, and Puck heads out immediately, greeting all his jock friends who are carrying six packs beneath their arms and have barely any actual camping stuff with them.
It makes Santana laugh, mostly because guys always think of beer before camping equipment, and she rolls her eyes before heading out of the truck and around to the back of it, hauling the few tents they brought, as well as their bags. Quinn thanks her, and she laughs because she's just nicer nowadays, but when they grab their stuff – Puck can get his own – and head over to the group now formed, she feels a certain pair of eyes on her and makes a point not to meet them.
She saw Brittany the second they peeled into the parking lot, but she knows she's got to keep it cool this weekend. Being in a place like this just invites drama, and Santana's doing her best not to cause any shit as Rick may not know that she's here, but should anything go down, he'll probably find out and she'd rather avoid another midnight visit or Lima Point ambush. She's still feeling really uncomfortable with that whole situation, as it just seems to have slid under the radar way too easily.
But now isn't the time to think about that, and several people greet her and Quinn when they roll up, but she hears the deafening silence come from a certain direction and lifts her eyes to find Kitty, Bree, and Dani, glaring at her from across the circle. It makes her shift uncomfortably, but she knew her ex-girlfriend would be here, alongside her current girlfriend who she's yet to verbally greet, and seeing as the whole prom royalty votes manipulation thing is still pissing her off, she thinks it's best to bite her tongue.
Despite everything inside of her wanting to snarl because really? Considering they don't have any solid evidence about her and Brittany, their attitudes are way off.
"Let's start this off the way we always do," Puck interrupts her thoughts, moving into the centre of the circle and claps his hands together loudly. "Get changed bitches, 'cos we're going for a swim."
For the first time since she arrived, Santana looks up towards Brittany, instantly finding blue eyes, wide and flashing with fear, and Santana gulps. They both know this is their first challenge; they literally talked about it in the pool, earlier this week. Five fucking minutes here and Santana knows she's already going to be tested, Brittany does too judging by her expression, but she bobs her head like everyone else does, not wanting to draw suspicion.
She looks to Quinn, who just shifts her gaze her way with an apologetic smile on her face and Santana wants to tell her to blue ball her boyfriend later for that move. It may be tradition, but Puck suggesting they go swimming means a serious lack of clothes and Santana literally said to Brittany she wouldn't be able to handle her in a bikini in public, but she guesses she's got no choice.
It's fine, though. It's fine.
She's totally got this.
/
Okay, she definitely doesn't have this.
It's one thing being at school, with hundreds of people watching, a definite motivation to make sure that Santana doesn't drool over her ridiculously attractive girlfriend, but when she's only got 20 or so pairs of eyes, and the sun is going down and bouncing off the water in the horizon and haloing Brittany, it's really fucking hard. Especially as the guys are playing water volleyball and all the girls are segregated into friendship groups, which naturally means Santana's with Quinn, Rachel, and a few others, and pretty much all the Cheerios are on the other side, so they literally have to stare at each other.
Santana's doing her best not to look at Brittany or talk to her – she's only freaking human and has minimal control when it comes to her girlfriend – but there's a part of her that knows if she's too casual, too evasive then that's going to arouse suspicion. Plus, her girlfriend is wearing a bright red bikini and she's stood in the shallows giggling with her friends, so her top half is completely out the water, and she genuinely looks like a mermaid with a smile that could light up a whole damn town, so that's causing issues, too.
But apparently, she's not the only one to have the same thought because Rachel nudges her in the elbow, giving her wide eyes as if to say stop staring and she flashes a half-aggressive smile that slips away the second she notices Quinn doing the same thing. Shit. Was she staring at Brittany?
"What?" She hisses when her friends don't say anything.
Rachel takes a step forward, palms skimming across the water as her eyes dart back to Jake who punches the ball across the lake, probably to seem like what she's about to say isn't too obvious. "I get that you and Brittany are still hiding your relationship," she starts, and her eyes drag back, meeting Santana's and she's smiling, but in like, a really fake way. "But you might want to make sure no-one thinks you're avoiding each other, or they'll start asking questions."
Quinn hums in agreement. "You can't talk at school and then not talk at all outside of it," she follows up with a shrug and a raised brow. "That's way more obvious than drooling over each other."
"I'm not drooling over her."
"Not yet," the blonde snaps back. "But that's because you've not even technically said hello to her since we got here, and you haven't stopped staring at her," she says knowingly and God, that's irritating. She's got a point. "If we're noticing it," her hand lifts out the water, gesturing between her and Rachel. "Than the Cheer-bitches will be, too."
Santana stills, jaw clenching as she looks between the two girls in front of her. She was worried about that, but she doesn't even really know what to say to Brittany because she's just soft when it comes to her. With everyone else, there's always a tinge of annoyance and irritation of being spoken to, but with the blonde she just melts. Hell, even Quinn told her that they need to work at covering it up and the safest choice is to just stay away from each other, like they talked about.
But now she's here, it doesn't feel like that's going well because she follows Rachel's gaze when she tips her head subtly, and she sees three pairs of eyes, belonging to Dani, Kitty and Bree, all narrowed over their direction and shit. Maybe it is more obvious that there's something going on if they're not being friendly, and when Brittany says something to her friends and begins wading out the pool, Santana knows this is her time to strike.
Still, it doesn't quell the nerves sparking inside her body as if Dani's even got a sniff of their relationship, all hell is going to break loose.
What else is she supposed to do though?
"Fine," she whispers and turns her attention back to her friends, annoyance showing in her expression. "I'll be more normal," she drags out the last word and Quinn smirks.
"Not too normal though," Rachel hurries and concern twists her features. "Remember what I said back in the hospital," she ducks her head and seriousness passes behind her eyes. "When I found out, it was super obvious, so be careful."
Santana nods her head, eyes shifting over to the side of the lake where Brittany's reaching down for her towel and inhales deeply. "Okay, not too normal then," she mostly says to herself but then she's turning away and heading over to the blonde, heart beating ten times faster than it was a minute ago.
/
"Hey."
It's casual. It's cool. It's said softly, but it still scares Brittany who jumps up, spinning around and giggling adorably when her eyes land on Santana who can't help but grin back.
But there's something else behind the blue, too, and Santana knows it's the same concern she's feeling. Since she came out the lake, she's felt several pairs of eyes burning into the back of her skull, and she knows at least half the group is watching as she's just come over to talk to Brittany, which is confirmed when she folds her arms, sucks her lips in and takes a quick peek over her shoulder.
But she has to talk to her. If she doesn't, it'll be weird because they talk at school and even greet each other in the parking lot and hiding it too well, might just have the opposite effect.
"Hey, San," Brittany breathes and leans over to the side, towel drying the ends of her hair before she wraps the towel around her body.
Brown eyes flash down to the movement, and even though all she wants to do is just take it back off her, the look Brittany gives her after lets her know it's probably smart to hold back on that, and that it was definitely done on purpose. Maybe she should grab her towel, too. "How was the drive here?"
They agreed to go separately, mostly because Dani apparently made another stupid pact for all the girls to come down together and due to them waiting until the weekend is over to tell her, it was a necessity. It kind of sucked, but at least Santana came with Quinn and Puck, who are now staring over at them and really? That's so not going to help if they're gawking like everyone else is.
"Long, but okay," the blonde replies and shakes her hair free before tying it up in a high ponytail. "How was yours?"
"Quinn and Puck tricked me into bringing my truck as apparently it has the most room," she laughs out, thinking about how distracted she was staring at her girlfriend that she didn't even hear what her friends asked her to do. She really thought they were talking about the pep rally and Puck's reinstated quarterback title.
Blue eyes flit over her shoulder. "Well, it does," Brittany smirks and the laughter stops as Santana's face twists into a narrowed, but playful, glare. "We both know that."
See, it's shit like that, that's not going to make this easier. It's already really freaking hard not to check the blonde out, head to toe, as she's just spent the last couple hours in the lake, in the sun, so she's got a light glow to her skin that's accentuating how blue her eyes are, and – oh yeah – she's still wearing a red bikini even if it's half covered with a towel, but Santana's really freaking trying. She's putting all her energy into controlling herself, and with the distance, it's been good, but she knows they've got to reduce that distance and find a middle ground where them interacting won't draw everyone's attention to them.
So, she clicks her tongue and rolls her eyes, holding back the smile that threatens to creep up. "Anyway," she quickly dodges, throwing Brittany a look that only she can see – she's not sure if they're out of eavesdropping distance – but Brittany just grins. Bitch. "The ride was fine, and I didn't even have to put up my own tent."
Brittany giggles for a minute, but then Santana becomes aware of the sound of water splashing and how there's a lack of male grunting coming from the jocks, so she takes another look over her shoulder to find everyone wading out the water. The sun has mostly gone down, and honestly, Santana's been waiting for this fucking moment so her girlfriend can put some damn clothes on – other people have eyes, which Santana's trying not to notice as obviously those eyes belong to Sam who's looked at Brittany a total of 37 times since she got changed into a bikini – but she's also kind of nervous.
They're talked, which is progress, but she knows they've got a fire pit and a lot of marshmallows and that just seems more dangerous somehow as there's no outside distractions and nowhere to go if shit gets weird. The last time they were gathered around a firepit, albeit different circumstances, Dani decided to play a childish game of truth and dare and ask her best friend if she had feelings for Santana.
That's not an event she wants to repeat, regardless of the intention of coming out about their relationship after the weekend is over, but it seems Brittany has the same reservations as she takes a step closer, ensuring no-one else can hear as they're now heading over and distracted by celebrating who won the game, and ducks her head, staring deeply into her eyes.
"You okay?"
Santana nods but no. She can't kiss her girlfriend and she's close enough to, but they knew it was going to be like this. "Yeah, just worse than I thought it was gonna be."
A sad smile twitches at the corner of the blondes lips. "I know," she exhales, eyes flitting over Santana's shoulders as the voices get closer. "But we're good. No-one's said anything and we've only got two days until we don't have to do this anymore."
It's true. Just two days until she doesn't have to avoid touching, or talking, or kissing Brittany. In the grand scheme of things, that's nothing and that's literally the only thing keeping her holding on right now. It's the only thing giving her motivation as the end is so close, but usually when Santana makes a plan, it goes off course and she wishes she didn't, but that damn tug is back in her stomach, telling her that she's nervous for a reason and that things aren't going to be that simple.
(Even though she's aware there's going to be shit with Dani and her friends, but Brittany's prepared and so is she.)
(Plus high school drama passes quickly, and Santana is way more focused on the whole Rick Pierce part of it.)
Her gut instinct hasn't let her down before – it's why she was so hesitant about this whole weekend and still hesitant about the pep rally next week in the first place – but they're here now and so she just repeats over and over in her head that it's only two days.
"Okay," she sighs and inhales deeply, letting it out through pursed lips and forces away the nerves on her face, replacing it with a smile.
"Okay," Brittany repeats and it just makes Santana want to kiss her, but then the blonde is stepping back, vision returning to over her shoulder and Santana knows she's got to go. "I'm gonna go get changed with the girls," she explains and against the urge to yell no, Santana nods. "I'll see you later," she leans in and reaches over, squeezing Santana's hand and then brushes past her to the voices coming up from behind.
Ignoring the heat flaring up her arm, Santana goes to meet Quinn, Rachel, Jake, and Puck as they all come out the water.
/
Puck's brought his guitar, Jake is apparently a triple threat as he can dance, sing and is kind of cute, and naturally Rachel finds any excuse to perform, so it shouldn't come as a surprise when they're all gathered around the firepit, the group turns into freaking Glee club. Dani can sing, so she does, apparently Kitty has a set of pipes too, and Santana bites back the urge to do so as well because everyone looks like they're having a good time and she doesn't want to do anything to fuck it up.
All she can imagine is her getting up to join in and the Cheer-bitches going dead silent. It's not like she's been the life of the party or anything so far and she's still butt hurt about the whole prom royalty bullshit so if one of them said something, or embarrassed her, she'd be leaping down their throat in a split second and that probably wouldn't go down too well.
But anyway, the next few hours go by and everything's relatively easy. Quinn congratulated Santana on speaking to Brittany sarcastically, Rachel said no-one said anything as she was listening in to every conversation when they were in the lake to bring reassurance, and they're all now sat around after eating way too many marshmallows and Sam picks up Puck's guitar and begins strumming a familiar song.
People are shocked, including Brittany which makes Santana look away as she feels irrationally jealous that this guy is impressing her girlfriend, but she leans back and bobs her head along as Sam sings a country song.
Annoyingly, it's actually quite good, but when she watches Sam get up, still plucking away and move behind Brittany who's sat on a log, she almost snaps, anger surging through her in a burning hot flash and up until now, she's been cool. Sam's been throwing Brittany looks and Santana's ignored it, thanks to Rachel nudging her and Quinn pinching the back of her calf when the scowl formed, but as she watches Sam bend down at the hip and sing into Brittany's ear, she almost breaks the camping chair she's sat on with how tight her grip gets.
This is the kind of place where Sam might be naïve enough to think he could seduce Brittany, regardless of him being there at Lima Point when Santana and Brittany were caught clambering out a steamed up car, but the longer she watches – losing restraint with every passing second – she begins realising it's on purpose. He doesn't look her way, just gazes adoringly at Brittany, but he does cast his gaze to Dani who nods her head and smirks, and Santana instantly knows this is why she had that gut feeling.
Sam may not have said anything directly to Dani, but it seems there's something going on and seeing as Brittany can't exactly reject the guy, Santana gets angry.
She shouldn't be. Brittany's hers and she's Brittany's – they're girlfriends for fuck sake – but the fact she can't go up there and drag Sam away with her finger hooked into his enormous mouth, is just pissing her off. Sure, they've talked since coming out of the lake earlier, but it's been brief and there's always been either Kitty or Bree lingering around Brittany, or Dani hanging off her arm, waiting to pull her away before the conversation can even flow, and it's happened way too many times to just be convenient.
So she decides to take a different approach here, and quickly climbs to her feet, staring down at Quinn and Rachel who snap their gaze up at her and she clenches her jaw. She just needs a time out.
"I'm gonna go pee," she announces and hazel eyes narrow, but she really needs Quinn not to call her out. "Won't be long."
Rachel hums in acknowledgement, Quinn continues glaring, and Santana doesn't hesitate any longer before she walks away from the sound of Sam serenading her freaking girlfriend.
The end of this weekend can't come soon enough.
/
I'm vibing this again. Hope you guys are too! Not many chapters left, but I'm hoping everything is being explained.