JACOB

He woke up to the rare circumstance of the sun in his eyes. He put his arm over his eyes as he began to come back into reality.

Was that a dream? He stretched his arm out to find the side of his bed empty and he sighed. It was another dream. God it was so good though, and so fucking realistic. He could still taste her, smell her on his skin…

Goddammit. He thought as he finally resigned himself to the bittersweet notion of his waking reality. He covered his face and eyes feeling the need to run or rub one out in the shower when a sound from the kitchenette had him sitting up. He got up, threw on his sweats and found a familiar pair of black shorts on the floor. His heart stuttered as he heard more noise coming from the kitchenette, catching the familiar buttery scent of coffee and honeysuckle. Was it all real?

He peered through the crack of his door and saw a slender woman, wearing one of his few t-shirts that looked like a dress on her, her mahogany hair cascaded like a waterfall down her back. She stood with her back to him, looking out the window in the kitchenette, drinking a cup of coffee, one leg crossed at the ankle behind the other. He could hardly breathe.

Good morning. Her velvety voice sent shivers down his back as it weaved its way across his mind. He walked out to the kitchenette and stood a few feet behind her, waiting for the moment he was going to wake up. She turned her head to the side, her eyes a darker shade of amber this morning. He reached out and brushed his fingers down her arm, her lips parted at the contact, and she turned to face him. The front of her nearly made him fall over, her nipples pulled tight beneath the cotton of his shirt and her darkening eyes flashed dangerously. She smiled and softened the intensity of her eyes, making her seem either more lethal or soft and gentle, he couldn't decide.

"I made coffee," she said, taking a sip, her eyes stayed on his over the rim of her cup.

He took a breath for what felt like the first time since he woke up. She crossed him to grab a cup from one of his cabinets and grabbed the coffee carafe, pouring the liquid into the cup for him.

"Black, if memory serves?" She said, placing the carafe back on the warmer and offered him the cup. He takes it and sips, feeling himself come back into his body and his mind settling on everything being real. He pinches the bridge of his nose and rubs his eyes, a last stitch effort to wake his ass up if he's still asleep. She smiles at him and hops up to sit on his counter, crossing her legs.

He settles in and feels his mind begin to come alive, and there were questions.

"So, who is Joshua exactly?" He says, feeling the burning agony of that version of reality slowly begin to fade.

She drops her eyes but keeps the smile on her face, pushing her hair behind her ear.

"Long or short story?" She says to the gray linoleum floor.

"You pick. I've got time." He says, leaning against the wooden frame to the kitchen.

She leans forward slightly, her eyes meeting his briefly.

"Joshua is a part of the Scotland tribe of vampires. He's young. Elda and Rosemary found him as a newborn roaming the Highlands. Alice wanted me to meet the tribe, but she mostly wanted me to meet him..."

Jacob's lips pursed as he took another sip of his coffee, trying to keep his mouth shut as the words burned on his tongue. He used to really like Alice and her quirky style and pixy personae. Renesmee continued despite his clear struggle to not voice an opinion.

"…and she was right. He and I hit it off and became friends right away. He was the first person I felt comfortable being around besides my family in months. He helped me relax and not think about…things." Her eyes flitted to his. His eyebrows arched and he shifted his stance on the wooden frame.

He thought of her hand on his cheek yesterday, seeing every moment she thought of him, saw his ghost in different unfamiliar areas of the world and felt the ache in her chest, the heat in her belly, felt her climax while thinking of his face…it was devastating.

"He mentioned to Alice and me that he wanted to travel a bit, see North and South America since he had only known the UK, so we talked to Grandma and Grandpa and they both agreed to take him in for a few weeks until he moves on. Rosemary will be coming to accompany him next week." She uncrossed her legs, hopped down and opened the door to his fridge. Her nose wrinkled as she saw his barren wasteland that was his food supply.

"You need a trip to the market, J," she said bending over to check a drawer, the edge of the shirt pulling dangerously high up her legs. Jacob stared, slightly transfixed as she continued to inspect.

"Um," he said clearing his throat and scratching the back of his head. "Yeah, I'm not home a lot." She straightened back up, shut the fridge, and turned to face him.

"Well, what am I supposed to eat?" She said leaning against the fridge, crossing her ankles again.

"I thought…" His eyebrows furrowed. "I thought you only drank blood. Isn't that what you eat, exclusively?" He said, still holding his cup of coffee.

"Mostly but I do enjoy food every now and again. Mostly fruit." She walked out of the kitchenette past where he stood and plopped down on his couch. "Like I would kill for an apple right now, or strawberries."

Jacob set down his cup on the counter and sat down next to her on the loveseat, her scent wafted into him like a mist. It was a tight squeeze next to her on the small loveseat, but he didn't mind her proximity, although it would be a challenge to keep his hands to himself. He was still worried she would disappear, or he would wake up any moment.

"I think one of the best things I've had was a mandarin while we were in Spain. It was like, the closest thing to drinking sunlight. Bright, sweet, warm…I want to take you there so you can have one someday." Her eyes sparkled as the dark amber of her eyes flitted back and forth between his.

I could have been there. He thought as he ran his fingers through his hair, and she went quiet. He looked back to her realizing that the walls in his mind were completely down and had been since yesterday. Everything was up for grabs, and he cursed as he realized.

"Ren, I'm sorry. I should have…dammit…" he massaged his temples as he stumbled over his words. He didn't really know how to say anything of how he felt about her leaving without it sounding like an accusation. Without it being tainted with his frustration of not being around her, with longing and angst. He was a shell of a person for a year, and he didn't know how to talk about that yet.

She took his hand and threaded her fingers between his. The contrast of her rosy alabaster skin and his deep copper was breathtaking. He inhaled, almost tasting her scent as she leaned into him slightly to adjust her weight, her mahogany hair falling forward.

"Could I try something, J?" Her eyes still staring at their hands intertwined, his thumb rubbed across hers. Her hand felt cool at first but as he held her, his warmth took over. He imagined his warmth traveling up her arm and into her body, making her feel him at her center.

"Depends," he said, the corners of his mouth ticked up and his eyes flashed. "What did you have in mind?"

She smiled as her eyes flashed to his mouth and the heat in his belly sparked to life.

"Would you be willing to show me like I showed you?" Her voice was light and unsure, just barely louder than a whisper.

Jacob shifted and sat up straighter. That was…literally everything he wasn't doing for a year. He hid everything he felt from everyone, his pain, the tears he shed in the shelter of his tiny cottage were his, and he didn't want to share. He didn't need anyone seeing him that way. But it was her. There was nothing about him that wasn't wrapped up in her from the moment she arrived on Earth. Could he actually share that with her and keep her with him? Would she stay? His stomach tightened as he turned back to face her achingly beautiful face, her eyes full of concern and anticipation.

"Alright." His voice sounds gravelly as it comes out and his heart begins to pound in his ears.
"Are you sure?" She whispers back.

"Yes." He lies, he isn't sure at all, but at some point, she will know, might as well be when he can bare it to her.

She runs her fingertips up his arm, leaving gooseflesh in their wake, her other hand does the same up his chest, and her hands cup the sides of his face. Her eyes darkening even more as she focuses intently on his eyes. He swallows hard, already feeling incredibly vulnerable.

"All you have to do is let me in." She says quietly her full lips hardly move.

"How?" His voice still hoarse.

Breath, J. The soft whisper of her voice is more pronounced as it slithers across his mind, and he closes his eyes and takes a deep breath.

And in a moment, he sees everything. Eyes watching her depart in her car as a preteen, still a small girl and fear creeped along his skin like spiders, for her safety. The pull and ache of grief; laughing with her, showing her how to fight, hunt, throw a baseball, every important moment in her life ripped away as she drives away with Alice down the narrow path to the road. Fighting with Bella and Edward about her being away; running through the woods hour after hour to push away the thought of her face, wishing she was home. Torrential heat at being cut off from her, not knowing if she was okay. Aching tightness at the absence of a picture, receiving an email, a text, a letter, a smoke signal, anything. Left behind…again. Like mother, like daughter, I guess. Runs in the family. Should have known this would happen again. Meant to be alone. Punching trees and sitting on the forest floor screaming into the rain, tears mixing with the drops of rain, the steam billowing around his body. The world around him…sepia and gray. The color escaped in a black Tesla.

He inhales deeply and lets a tear escape and it runs down to find its final resting place in her fingers. He doesn't open his eyes yet. He's not ready to see her face, not ready to see how everything has shifted, how his mind may have ruined it all.

A pair of soft lips touch his and his breath catches in his throat. Her thumb traces along his jaw as her hands continue to cradle his face. She pulls herself onto his lap and wraps her legs around his waist, and he places his hands gently on her low back pulling her closer to him. She gently opens her mouth to him, and her tongue swiped into his mouth, tasting her. He dips his tongue into her mouth in return and a low moan escapes his chest as she moved her hips against his hardening length. He fists the loose-fitting t-shirt in his hands at her low back as she grinds into him. He finds her bare back under the t-shirt and finds she is completely bare, and his body begins to vibrate as he palms her backside forcing her hips to drive hard into him. She whimpers into his mouth as he gently pulls down his sweatpants and pulls the oversized t-shirt over her head, but before he can line up with her, she steps off him and stands before him completely naked. She bends down and kneels between his knees, her hand wraps around his length.

"You…you don't have to…" he says through agonal breaths with each swipe of her hand.

"Please," she whispers, her lips parted as she strokes up over his cock and thumbs over his head.

His head falls back onto the back of the loveseat, and she places soft kisses over his head, opening her mouth slowly, running her tongue along his head. He covers his eyes with his hands, trying not to touch her head, and keep his hips from bucking into her mouth. When she takes all of him in her mouth, he moans as his grips the back of the loves seat, she hallows out her cheeks and slowly sucks all the way back up to his tip, letting her tongue swipe over his head.

It was all he could handle; he was going to pop if she kept going.

"Ren please," he pulled her arms, and she looked up at him through her lashes and he nearly came seeing her that way. "Can I have you?" He said, his eyes pleading. She stood up and put her knees on either side of his thigh, straddling him.

She looked into his eyes as she lined him up to her entrance, feeling the wet folds of her against his tip. "You will always have me, Jacob." And she lowered herself onto him, taking all of him into her. He watched her eyes roll back with her head, her hands resting on his shoulders.

"Fuck," he muttered. "God, you're so beautiful." He felt her walls flutter around him as she began to move her hips. He put his hands on her ass and squeezed as she picked up her pace. Her eyes floating back to his, they were black as pitch her cheeks rosy with a slight pale sheen to it. She was hungry. Her hips moved faster and her breasts began to bounce as she moved.

"Can I?" she rasps at him, looking at him with dangerous eyes. All his life, Jacob was taught that vampires were the enemy, that they were devils…cold ones. This was everything he was told was wrong, that this was wrong…

But…it was her.

"Yes," he moaned as he rucked his hips into her. She found his neck and he felt a sharpness and burn as he felt her teeth sink through his skin and he sucks in a breath through his teeth. She licked and drank gently as he rucked into her even harder, feeling the pressure catapult in his hips. He was so close. She moaned softly as she sucked on his neck, her walls tightening with every snap of his hips. She threaded her fingers into his hair and pulled gently, the pressure in his hips mounting.

"Oh fuck…fuck," he says as he tried to hold off, one more snap of his hips and she screamed, her walls clapped down hard around him, her head tilted back from him and presses against his forehead and he crashed with her, spilling into her as she squeezed him on every side, his hands drift up to her back from her ass. He watched her breathe; her eyes shut as her forehead stays to his.

Jacob. Her voice slides into his brain with ease now. It danced over the rubble that was his walls.

I love you, Jacob.

His heart shattered as the words flit like a butterfly through his brain, echoing against the empty spaces and fills them with her words, her voice.

For a moment his breath falters and his eyes prickle.

"Make it real, Ren." He says and she opens her eyes; they are back to their bright golden amber, her brows pull together slightly.

Say it. He pushes into her mind, the feeling is effortless now, like it was something they were always meant to do.

"I love you, Jacob. I think I always have." Her eyes flickered in the morning light as she said the words he'd waited for years to hear.

"I love you." He says without hesitation and kisses her gently again.

Stay. His voice a whisper as it passes through to her.

"Now and forever." She whispers against his lips, and he pulls her closer.

RENESMEE

She rose to her tip toes as she reached among the thick green branches and leaves, her fingertips brushed against her target. She gently hopped and finally wrapped her hand around the small bright orange fruit. She exhaled and placed her heels on the step, feeling his protective grip on her hips as she turned. He picked her up off the step ladder and set her gently down on to the grass.

The sun had dipped under the horizon, twilight had set in, and the first stars blinked in the pink, purple sky of Spain. The peel fell away easily, staining her fingernails white and orange, the sharp and sweet juices running down her arm. She pulled away the pieces, taking the first sliver and offering it to Jacob. He opened his mouth and let her put the slice in his mouth, his lips brushing against her fingertips, and she bit her lower lip.

Jacobs eyes rolled back and moaned as he chewed.

"Shit that's good." He said through a mouth full of mandarin. She smiled and put a piece into her mouth, letting the juice and flesh sparkle and dance on her tongue, but it wasn't as good as she remembered. She pursed her lips and furrowed her brow as she chewed gently.

"What's wrong?" He smiled as his mirrored her pinched brow. "Don't you like it?"

But there was something else that this little mandarin's taste paled to in comparison. She closed her eyes and remembered her lips on his neck, tasting him for the first time and it was like she felt warmth and sunlight for the first time. His blood, his lifeforce, was life, the sun, summertime, heat, the sand in summer, rays that broke through the trees in the forest, sparkling like diamonds on the surface of the water, it was the woods, the rain, the Earth, the water, the Moon and Sun. He was the best thing she had ever tasted and as she chewed, she fluttered her lashes up to his bright smiling eyes.

"No, it's good but it's not as good as you." She said smiling and he laughs and he took her arms and pulled her close to him. He kisses her gently, she drops the mandarin and holds his arms as he dips his tongue into her mouth, his taste mixes with the Spanish mandarin and she feels herself floating. If there was a heaven, she was there.