"OH, COME ON!" Snotlout was standing in the massive bay door of the clubhouse, gazing out at the sheets of sideways-pouring rain. He jumped back as lightning struck the lightning rod above them. "NOT AGAIN."

Hiccup yawned, and Astrid watched as he quickly took stock of his surroundings, confusion settling to something warm and soft that she didn't quite want to name. "Snotlout, you know Thor likes to go all out for us."

"YEAH!" Tuffnut swung down from the beams above the fireplace– how did he get up there?- and landed in a clumsy roll that sent his helmet flying into Fishlegs' stomach. "When it storms here, it storms."

Ruffnut looked up from her book. "Yes," She replied, and Astrid wondered why she had the right to sound so wise when she was about to say something stupid. "Loki probably tells Thor to send us the biggest storms out of nowhere so he can REALLY reward us for our mischief!"

"So if we throw the twins off a cliff we'll stop getting these crazy summer storms?" Snotlout grinned, crossing the room to where Fishlegs had bolted awake. "Get up, UP, UP FISHFACE! We've got some people to chuck!"

Astrid couldn't help but snort. However, on Hiccup's nudging, she rose and shoved Snotlout back and away from the twins. "As tempting as that is," She gave Ruffnut a teasing glare, " getting rid of the twins means you have to do double patrols. Is that really worth it?"

Snotlout hesitated, mouth open, ready to retort…. And slumped. "Nah. Let's just make them do all the outside work today."

Astrid snorted. "Now that's something I could get behind." Three, two, one…

Hiccup stood right on cue. "Now, hang on, guys." He cautioned, and there were those wild hand gestures he always made. Where had he even gotten that from? His father had never done that. Maybe his mom?

Astrid wished she'd had a chance to meet her.

"We can't just dump all the worst tasks on the twins for no reason. We'll all just have to split our chores evenly, like usual, and deal with the rain."

"But there's a baby!" Snotlout complained. "Somebody's gotta sit with the thing all day—" Astrid bristled. "— and it's not gonna be me!"

Astrid turned to Hiccup, an idea quickly forming somewhere in the back of her mind. "He's right, you know."

Hiccup spluttered. "Wh-well- YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO BE ON MY SIDE!"

"Oh, no, I am!" Astrid said, and anyone could tell by her cheeriness that she was plotting something. "I just think there might be a better way to handle all of…" She gestured around: to the riders, the storm, Gunnar (who Hiccup had wrapped up in that horrid leather sling). "…this."

Hiccup mirrored her lose, hands on his hips, head tilted. "And what might that be?"

"Oh, I think I know where this is going." Snotlout cackled gleefully.

"A competition." Astrid announced, waving the twins, Fishlegs, and Heather over. Heather quietly pulled Gunnar out of the sling and took him over to the fireplace table, ignoring Hiccup's violently whispered protests. The little baby looked up at her with curiosity in his shining eyes. "We do…"

"A yak-tipping contest?!" Tuffnut screeched. Gunnar began to cry and Ruffnut bashed Tuffnut over the head with what looked like a stale chicken leg. "Idiot." She muttered. "Now he's crying."

Heather rocked Gunnar while Fishlegs wondered aloud, "Where on earth are we even gonna get yaks?"

"I vote we send the twins." Snotlout deadpanned.

"No one is going out there right now!" Hiccup finally cried. "Can we please just listen to Astrid?!"

"Simp." Heather snorted. Hiccup sent her a wondering, annoyed glance, but Astrid was already continuing. "No, something we can do inside, like singing or cooking or an arm wrestling contest."

"WE. ARE. NOT. SINGING." Snotlout groaned. "Not in a million—" Heather glared at him across the room and he rushed to amend, "Oorrrrrr yeah, singing sounds great, I'll just be— over there? Yeah!" He rushed out into the rain, screeching when a lightning bolt almost hit him.

"Wow. He's more scared of me than the storm." Heather smirked. Her face was almost predatory. Astrid thought it was great. Finally, someone other than the twins to bully Snotlout with.

"Can we focus?" Hiccup called over the white noise of thunder and the twins arguing. "We need to organize this! What are we doing first?!"

"Wrestling?" Astrid glanced first to Heather, then to Hiccup. One looked significantly more excited at that prospect than the other. "I don't trust the twins with weapons in an enclosed space."

"I don't trust the twins with weapons ever!" Heather laughed, pulling her axe from its sheath and running a finger down the blade. Astrid could see her brain slotting that aside as another task for later: sharpen axe. She needed it to take Dagur's head off, after all.

(Astrid thought that plan was a little overkill, but she respected it.)

"I'll organize the bracket!" Fishlegs volunteered, springing up and (finally) accidentally kicking Meatlug awake. She whimpered, and of course he spent the next five minutes apologizing. Meanwhile, the others, minus Snotlout, were putting their heads together to pick two other games. Everyone but Astrid voted for singing (the twins wanted to see Snotlout squirm and Hiccup wanted to see Astrid squirm). Then it got a little more difficult. No one wanted to eat Ruff or Tuff's cooking, so they tossed that idea aside. The twins insisted arm wrestling wasn't a sport, which may have just been a poorly-executed bid for yak-tipping. Then boar tossing. Then boar wrestling, which Astrid hadn't even known was a thing. Finally they settled on two more events: a mini axe-throwing contest and, because they'd convinced the twins it was the next best thing, the wrestling match they'd already planned. By then Fishlegs had finished drawing up a bracket on a wide swath of the far wall.

Thunder boomed as Hiccup raised both hands high above his head— when had he put Gunnar back in that disgusting thing around his chest? Astrid was going to smack him— and shouted: "LET THE GAMES BEGIN!"

—

Singing was gonna be the funniest, so they decided to do that one first. Heather and Fishlegs insisted everyone team up. Of course the twins wanted to stick together, so that left Astrid and Hiccup with Snotlout…

…which was actually a weirdly good thing?

Astrid couldn't hold a note for her life, but she could play a decent jouhikko, so she plucked out a tune while a soaking-wet Snotlout sung. Hiccup complained endlessly, but in the end his competitive spirit took over. Ruffnut and Tuffnut were doing something that (big surprise) involved maces and a massive drum that they'd apparently been hiding in their house. Heather and Fishlegs, on the other hand, were being very secretive.

"Time's up!" Hiccup yelled over the din as soon as the half-hour glass ran down, earning an offended mid-note screech from Snotlout, who was still trying to get one run right. Astrid couldn't hear the difference, honestly, but he insisted it was pitchy. The twins' banging came to a halt only when Heather came over and yanked the maces from their hands. "So, who goes first?" She asked, twirling the weapons expertly midair. "Fight to the death for first go?"

Hiccup's face screwed up. "Actually, I think we'll go last." Snotlout once again let out a loud wordless complaint. Astrid clamped a hand over his mouth, then whispered, "Hiccup, what are you doing?"

His eyes were calculating. Oh, we're taking this seriously now, OK. "I just want to see what the others do."

"NO COPYING!" Tuffnut yelled out of nowhere. "I'LL EAT YOUR TOES!" Astrid pantomimed vomiting in her mouth. "You might not want to do that." Hiccup snarked. "M'lady-" agh she loved it when he said that– stupid soft spot- "- here hasn't taken a bath since we left Berk!"

Nevermind.

Hiccup got a jab in the ribs, but Astrid didn't speak for fear of never starting this blasted tournament. Thankfully, Fishlegs intervened. "Why don't we go around the room? Heather and I will start—"

"Biased." Snotlout snorted. Where had he even learned that word?

"— and then the twins, and since Hiccup wanted to go last, you three can be the last to go." Astrid nodded, satisfied, and dragged a practically hissing Snotlout over to the eight-sided table. "Trust Hiccup." She snapped.

Snotlout stilled. "Wait, there's a plan?"

Astrid facepalmed.

"Fishlegs?" Hiccup strutted out into the middle of the room, Gunnar in his sling. "Are you ready?"

"Yep!" The bigger Viking gave his pipes an experimental blow.

"You ready, buddy?" Hiccup asked the baby, ducking his chin to look him in the eyes.

Gunnar gurgled. Astrid thought she was going to explode. Since when did cute things get to her? Wait, when did I start thinking of Hiccup as cute?!

She wasn't wrong though. Ugh, it must be close to that time of the month again. Astrid tried to set her head on straight. All of this was so out of her league.

Heather and Fishlegs, in the end, did really well. Heather had taught Fishlegs the tune to her lullaby at some point, and so she sung while Fishlegs played along. Hiccup came and sat next to Astrid, looping an arm comfortably over her shoulders (to relieve the pressure on his back from the sling, or that's what he told Snotlout when he kept snickering at them). The performance received a light smattering of applause.

Then the twins went. Astrid's instincts told her to cover Gunnar's ears, and boy was she glad she listened, because by the end of it she'd wished she'd covered her own ears. Or maybe used Stormfly's earplugs. Or buried her head in a mound of sand. Or–

Looking up Hiccup told her he felt the same.

"Thank you, twins, for… that…" Fishlegs managed, blinking. "The dancing was…. impressive… and the, uh, the mace! Drumming! Very… very creative!"

"We know!" The twins crowed in unison, bashing their heads together. Astrid wondered if they had any brain cells left to lose.

"Alright," Heather announced, holding her hands out for Gunnar. "You guys' turn."

Astrid swallowed, picking up her instrument. "We need a volunteer for this one!" Hiccup called, handing the baby carrier off to Heather. Gunnar sniffed, but to everyone's relief, didn't start crying. Heather wrinkled her nose. "Hiccup, what happens if he poops in the leather?"

"He's got a diaper on." He assured her. "I'll check him as soon as we're done."

"Wait, isn't this cheating?" Tuffnut asked, "because if so I volunteer my sister!"

"Alright!" Hiccup easily spoke right over Ruffnut's complaints, dragging her out into the middle. "Perfect! You two ready?"

"This is stupid." Snotlout deadpanned.

"We know." The whole room echoed. He snorted, standing and shuffling his feet. Then he nodded to Astrid, silently counting in his head.

"I'll swim and sail on savage seas…" Snotlout began, and a hush fell over the room. He gulped. Astrid nodded him on. "With ne'er a fear of drowning…"

Ruffnut grinned, shooting Astrid a wiggly-eyebrow look that she decidedly ignored. Hiccup took her shoulders and she took his. "If you would promise me your heart…"

"AND LOVE ME FOR ETERNI– oh, sorry, I don't want you guys to win. I forgot." Tuffnut muttered.

"And love me for eternity…"

The pair danced around the room. It was… weirdly not awkward, given that Hiccup no right feet. (True whichever way one were to interpret it.) He was a good dancer, Astrid realized– unlike herself.

"My dearest one, my darling dear, your mighty works astound me…" Snotlout flawlessly slipped up an octave to do the female part, and it took Astrid's utmost concentration not to miss a note on her jouhikko. "But I've no need of mighty deeds when I feel your arms around me."

Hiccup and Ruffnut broke apart and began clapping, dancing around each other so fast Fishlegs burst out laughing. Snotlout, caught up in the enjoyment, picked up the pace and volume, and so did Astrid. "OH! But I would buy you rings of gold–"

"Oh, would you?" Heather snorted.

"- and even read you poetry–"

"Now that I'd like to hear." Fishlegs snarked, but his eyes were trained on them nontheless.

"I only want your hand to hold, I only want you near me!" The two dancers spun around each other, laughing when Ruffnut stepped on Hiccup's prosthetic and almost faceplanted. Thank goodness Hiccup managed to get up off one knee and spin her around. They went 'til they'd almost hit the back wall and rushed back in again, dipping in and out on opposite sides of each other faster and faster as Snotlout went. "To laugh, to kiss, to sweetly hold–"

"EVERYONE!" Hiccup bellowed, laughing, and Heather leapt up, grabbing Fishlegs' hand. Ruffnut went and grabbed Tuffnut, who grabbed Snotlout, and Hiccup set Astrid's instrument to one side. Altogether, they bellowed, "FOR THE DANCING AND THE DREAMING! THROUGH ALL LIFE'S SORROWS AND DELIGHTS, I'LL KEEP YOUR LAUGH INSIDE ME!"

"FASTER!" Someone bellowed, and they all joined hands like it was Snoggletog Eve, dancing through the gaps in the other sides' wall. Breathless by now, they continued: "I'LL SWIM AND SAIL ON SAVAGE SEAS, WITH NE'ER A FEAR OF DROWNING, IF YOU WOULD PROMISE ME YOUR HEART… IF YOU WOULD MARRY ME!" They held the last note out as long as they could, spinning and switching and leaping until at last they collapsed breathless into one big pile in the middle of the room. "Everything's… spinning…" Tuffnut whispered, and Hiccup let out a breathless chuckle.

Astrid glanced up. "Snotlout's… Snotlout's still going!"

"EEEEEeeeeee…" Snotlout paused, taking a deep breath, and smirked. "Does this mean we win?"

Heather put her thumb up and the three cheered, the twins grumbling, still too tired to move.

"Okay, next challenge." Hiccup pulled himself to his feet.

And stopped.

"What. where's Gunnar?"

All Hel broke loose– until Snotlout spotted a little foot disappearing under the pantry's bottom shelf. Hiccup rushed over and pulled him out right as he managed to uncork a bottle of jam they'd been saving for a special occasion. We'll have to use that tonight, he thought. "Okay, little dude, you need to stop escaping."

Astrid pulled him out of Hiccup's arms, sending him a glare with no real force behind it. "Maybe if someone would hold him–"

"It's convenient–"

"He's a child–"

"IT DOESN'T MATTER!" Fishlegs cried, pointing to the bracket. "Next game is axe throwing!"

Astrid and Heather shared twin smirks. "Oh, this should be fun."