Whew, this was a long and tricky chapter to write! Hopefully everyone enjoys it! Happy reading!
pasorider67-I'm glad your loving Duckie as a character and I hope the cliffie wasn't too horrible! Enjoy the latest chapter!
koffiqueen-I'm glad you found the last chapter exciting. Action sequences are one of my favorite things to write! We're about to find out about Arthur in this chapter. Happy reading!
Disclaimer: I do not own Lord of the Rings, the Silmarillion, or anything associated with Tolkien Enterprises. I also do not own any music by Stephen Foster, Thomas Haynes Bayly, Caroline Atherton Mason, S.M. Grannis, or George Loder. Their lyrics are included in this fanfic and they are old enough to be considered public domain.
ooOoo
Guardians of Arda
By Ponytail Goddess
Chapter 15: Promises and "Practice"
Duckie's eyes flashed open, shining with rings of crimson, gold, forest green, and cerulean as they caught sight of the one person she desired to see most.
Father!
She longed to shout his name from the highest mountaintops after the long and burdensome month that had passed in his absence, but found she could not seem to move her lips. In fact, her body would not move from its prone position on the floor. Her arms and legs were sprawled across the coarse wooden planks as she laid on her stomach, dripping with black spider filth. Her head was awkwardly craned to left, just far enough that she could see his shiny black boots approaching, covered by loose black pantlegs. She watched as he silently knelt down before her, his white striped shirt and burgundy vest coming into view as he fell to his knees.
The light of the sparse flames and glowing embers spread a golden hue across his pale face and hands, creating a soft, reflective halo of light around the top of his dark head. His shiny hair was such a deep brown that it was almost black in appearance, just like hers, and was half pulled back into a loose ponytail behind his head.
It was his eyes and his expression that floored Duckie though, as he trembled with fear while he examined her, one of his hands cradling her cheek and the other resting lightly upon her upper arm. His grey eyes were wide and filled with horror as he whispered softly with the voice she had desperately longed to hear.
"No… no. Oh dear Vala, this is all my fault…" He despaired, tears springing to his eyes as he looked down at her unmoving form. He stroked her hair with tender care as he cried mournfully at her state. "This is all my fault. Dearest Elbereth, please have mercy on my daughter. Do not let my sins dictate her fate. She is in trouble. Please send someone to help her, for I cannot…" He sobbed hopelessly, his familiar baritone voice tinged with unbearable pain. "I cannot."
Duckie wanted to reassure him that she would be fine, to comfort him and ask him where he had been all of this time, but no words seemed to form within her mouth. All she could do was listen to him beg and plead to the Valar upon her account, whispering a most solemn prayer in her name.
"Please," He begged them over and over again with a sorrowful voice, "Save her."
The world spun around Duckie as she woke to the door thundering loudly beneath heavy, pounding fists and a familiar voice screaming her name repeatedly. The voice was persistent, but she couldn't seem to convince her body to get up and open the door. In fact, she could barely open her eyes, for the light of morning seemed too bright to bear beneath the pulsating pain in the back of her head. She started to realize that sound was flashing in and out of her ears as she tried to figure out what had happened. It was no use though, as she couldn't seem to think straight.
After a loud cracking sound tore through the cabin, a voice called out to her and then strong hands flipped her onto her back. Duckie squeezed her eyes shut at the sudden onslaught of glaringly bright light, but not before catching a glimpse of worried silver eyes. A voice was trying to communicate something to her, but the rushing sound in her ears only let little snippets of phrases register within her mind.
The next thing she knew, she was pulled against a strong body by firm, muscular arms. The scent of leaves and cool fall air inundated her nose as the arms whisked her away from her home on the floor. They cradled her limp body momentarily before she found herself placed upon a soft, feather-filled mattress. The room faded again to black as she heard her name called over and over again.
The next time she awoke, it was to soft touches by large, warm fingers. They traveled slowly, gently tracing across areas of her face, neck, and arms. A voice whispered a language she could not understand, but each word seemed to leave a tingling feeling beneath her skin… one she had felt before, though she could not remember when.
Every caress seemed to draw the aches right out of her bruises and wounds, draining her pain away like water flowing through a sieve. Duckie shuddered and trembled beneath the feather-light touch, still deeply confused and unable to open her eyes, no matter how hard she tried.
"Father…" she breathed, remembering her vision and his tears for her—his whispered prayer. Surely it was he who tended to her so carefully. He had been right there with her on the floor.
"Please… don't leave me." She whispered breathily, hardly able to make her lips obey her command to speak.
The soft and comforting trail of warmth suddenly came to a stop, then left her body altogether. Duckie silently mourned their loss, feeling very lost and alone in her dazed state. However, the fingers were readily replaced by a large, warm hand enveloping her own, squeezing it tightly before letting it rest tenderly within its grasp.
A warm breath tickled her ear, which was followed by a low, murmuring voice. "I'm not going anywhere. I promise." The words were deeply comforting to Duckie and she squeezed the hand right back before falling back into the darkness.
Later, the same voice beckoned her once again. "Dúcuivië," it steadily called out from a distance, leading her to the light and guiding her back to the land of awakening. She was reaching up towards the sound, almost there-
Duckie woke up with a gasp, suddenly becoming aware of her surroundings. She was lying in a bed and judging by the scent, it was the larger bed in the farmhouse. It was the one that had once belonged to Lewis; she could tell because her feet were not awkwardly hanging off the bottom of it, as they did in the shorter trundle bed.
The quiet breathing of another person was audible from her righthand side. Indeed, a warm hand was holding her own and squeezed it as she started to stir. Her eyes would still not cooperate though, as she was only able to squint when she tried to look and see who was beside her.
A breeze lightly blew across her face, caressing her skin as it carried the wind's slow, elongated whispers straight to her ears, "Your destiny awaits…"
"Wha-?" She murmured, trying her best to make out who the figure was sitting beside her as she listened to the wind hiss with that ever-familiar word.
"Dúcuivië? Good, you are awake." Came a familiar voice. A male voice, but not her father's as she had hoped. "I have healed what injuries I was able to see, but I need you to show me what still hurts so I may finish the job."
"Head…" she muttered through the fog that clouded her mind. "My head."
"Where?" The voice asked again, then insisted, "Show me where."
Cautiously, Duckie brought her arm up and indicated the back of her head, cringing as she accidently grazed the sore area. Warm hands guided her head very carefully to its side, then pieced through the back of her hair a bit. Whoever it was must have taken out her braids, as she could feel her hair was oddly loose. Duckie never slept without her hair braided, as it was much more manageable to style if it was kept tidy during the night. In fact, she usually wore a sleep bonnet upon her head to ensure it did not become tangled.
A gasp interrupted her thoughts. Duckie assumed that meant the person next to her must have caught sight of whatever wound was lingering back there. Surely it was terrible, as it hurt worse than any other part of her body. Indeed, she found herself wincing as the warm and gentle fingers returned, once again carding through her hair to gain access to the area.
"I am sorry if I'm hurting you," the voice remorsefully responded. "I will try to be fast."
The voice launched into a set of whispered words then, ones Duckie could not understand. The words were rushed and fast. They were followed by an immediate tingling sensation that erupted in the back of her head. While it wasn't painful, the tingling was strong and nearly overwhelming. Duckie groaned with displeasure as she tried to fully comprehend what was happening around her.
She tried to open her eyes again and now found they were less sensitive to the light. The words were now more recognizable. "Sindarin," she realized in her mind as she became more and more aware of her surroundings, "The voice is speaking Sindarin."
Haldir's voice. As her thoughts grew clearer and her eyes opened wider, she was able to finally watch him as he whispered to her. His eyes were scrunched up in pain and there was a drawn look of weariness to his facial features that she had never witnessed before…
…and then she remembered the bloodshot eyes of her friend Arthur.
Duckie's jaw trembled and her breath started to catch in her throat as she remembered how still he was on the floor last night. She had tried so hard, but she had not been able to save him…
"Arthur…" She whispered, then started gasping and sobbing as she tried to tell Haldir what had happened as feelings of distress quickly overtook her. "Haldir… I-I think Arthur is d-dead. I tried to s-save him from the spider, but… but…"
His silvery eyes opened and immediately she felt his large hand squeezing her own, still holding her hand as he had when she last awoke. "Dúcuivië, you need not worry about Arthur; he is not dead, but merely stunned by the spider's venom."
"Stunned?" She questioned, blinking the tears out of her eyes as she tried to comprehend his news.
"Yes, the venom merely slowed his breathing and blood flow so he could not escape. Spiders like to eat live prey, so they never kill their victims outright. Arthur is still sleeping it off—I put him on the trundle bed over by the fire. He will probably have a headache when he wakes up, but should recover fairly quickly upon waking." He informed her, turning and indicating to Duckie where Arthur laid. Indeed, she saw him on the trundle bed laying as still as when she last saw him, but with a bit more color in his face than he had the night before.
"He's going to be fine?" She asked again, needing a bit more reassurance.
"Yes, he's going to be fine. It is you that I am worried about, as you were all banged up when I found you this morning." Haldir said, his eyes filled with what appeared to be worry as he inspected her face carefully.
"I am grateful you are awake. You gave me quite the scare," he said as he squeezed her hand again, "I should have never left you alone." He whispered, donning a very serious look upon his face. Duckie saw a brief flash of guilt pass over his visage before he gently ran his fingers lightly down the side of her face, causing a shiver to run down Duckie's spine.
How did he always manage to make her feel this way, as if her heart was about to beat right out of her chest? There was just something about Haldir that made her blood flow a bit faster and her skin tingle in many unusual and delightful ways. My goodness, his face was so close to hers… so very close. It was nerve-racking. She wondered if he felt the same tension when he was near her too.
"Are you hurt anywhere else?" He asked quietly, his eyes never leaving hers, not even for a second.
Duckie felt her face blush as she replied, "My knees… they hit the rocks on the bottom of the creek when I fell in. Also… also my thigh." She looked down as her heart fluttered, having not wanted to admit the location of that particular problem.
If Haldir was bothered by it though, his voice did not give anything away as he calmly asked, "What happened to your thigh?"
"I… um… sorry, it's a bit embarrassing…" She admitted with a flustered voice, blushing a bit as she murmured her confession. "When I jumped back onto Tulkas to escape the second spider, I jumped too far and swung all the way around his neck before I landed on the saddle. The saddle horn… it scraped across my inner thigh in a very painful manner before I came to a halt."
Haldir was silent for a short time, but then replied, "I regret that I was unable to prevent it." When Duckie tentatively raised her eyes to meet his again, she nothing but sincerity resting within their silvery depths. She then slowly sat up and watched as he stood up and moved his kitchen chair to the bottom of the bed. He tugged a bit at the bottom of the plum and magenta quilt and then met her gaze again. "May I?"
Duckie carefully held the quilt over her chest with her bare arms and nodded, trying not panic as he exposed her white linen drawers, which extended well past her knee and ended at the center of her calves with a thin line of lace. Taking in a deep and silent breath through her nose, Duckie tried her best not to be mortified, as it was completely improper for any male to be looking her legs.
Well, at least that was how the mortals seemed to feel about it. She had never seen nor heard of any reputable women exposing their legs in public. It was considered indecent and improper in all of the many states and territories she had lived in thus far.
Haldir did not seem to be particularly bothered by it though, which raised an interesting question within her mind. "It is not improper for a male to see a female's legs amongst the elves, is it?" Duckie asked quietly as she felt him push the bottoms of her drawers up to expose her bony knees.
"It is not a common place event in the world of the elves, but no, it is not considered improper the way it is within the mortal realm." He replied casually. She gasped as she felt his warm hands come to rest on each of her knees, pain immediately shooting through them when he applied light pressure.
"I'm sorry," He blurted, apologizing at once and then quickly set about whispering the healing words. His face once again contorted into one of concentration as he squeezed his eyes shut. The tingling feeling of healing immediately filled her knees, hurting them at first, but then soothing the pain away until it was no longer detectable. Duckie sighed with relief as she heard his words die down and felt the pain dissolve at last.
"Which thigh is it?" He asked after a short hesitation. Duckie pointed to her right silently and watched an odd, inscrutable expression overtake Haldir's normally confident face. "Take my hand and guide it to where the pain is; I will heal it for you."
Tentatively, Duckie did as he asked, taking his hand gently within her own and guiding it further up the inside of her leg until she found where the painful bruising had occurred. Without looking at her, Haldir closed his eyes again and quickly healed the area with his whispered chanting until all traces of lingering discomfort were gone.
Duckie stared at his face as he completed the healing. She noticed that he left his eyes closed even when he was done, quickly sliding his hand out of baggy pantleg of her drawers and then looking away from her, a slight tinge of color appearing on his cheeks as he moved away. Yes, this area was improper for both mortals and immortals and both of them knew it. However, Duckie was still relieved that he had been willing to do what needed to be done without complaint, despite their mutual discomfort.
Now that she was traveling with a group of ellyn, Duckie figured uncomfortable situations like this were likely to occur. While he could have chosen to ignore her pain to avoid his own discomfort, Duckie was impressed that he had chosen to address it anyway. In return for this little blessing, she elected to say nothing about the mild look of embarrassment she had seen flash across his face and instead, followed his line of sight out the door of the farmhouse. Her eyes widened at the sight and her former train of thought was quickly forgotten.
"What happened here?" She asked quietly, not understanding the picture she was now gazing upon.
"I was hoping you could tell me. This is the scene I stumbled upon when I arrived this morning." Haldir replied as he turned and looked back at her calmly.
"I need to see what's out there," she hastily demanded, then found herself swinging her legs over the edge of the bed and walking over to the door, her current state of dress completely forgotten as she saw what he had found.
The first thing she noticed was that both the door and its locking mechanism were broken and would require some serious repairs if it was to be secured again tonight. Long scratches ran up and down the sides of the door and its frame, proof of the struggle that had occurred between Duckie and the beast. The detached spider leg was still lying by the door, though it had stopped writhing and laid curled in a dried-up pool of black blood. Duckie's eyes followed the blood trail across the floor that led to her father's dagger, which had slid across the floor and stopped in front of the fireplace.
Outdoors, the scene seemed to be even more astonishing. Pieces of Duckie's clothing were strewn across the lawn and some had even blown into the fields of crops. Several broken pumpkins and their innards were scattered across the veranda; their seed-filled slime was dripping down the exterior of the house. Just off the left side of the veranda, the spider laid dead on the ground, also covered in pumpkin goop and black blood.
Duckie stared at the beast's carcass, speechless until she felt two strong hands gently set the blanket over her shoulders. "Oh…" Duckie said in surprise, her cheeks blushing as she suddenly realized that she was partially undressed. "Thank you."
She wrapped the blanket tightly around her shoulders and then launched into a brief explanation of how she had left her clothes outdoors and then how Arthur had come around to apologize. She indicated that he had offered to get her a dress from the backyard, only to be attacked by the beast. Though she was embarrassed about it, she recounted the tale of how she had failed miserably at fighting off the spider and how it attempted to lift the locking bar across the interior of the door to gain entry to the farmhouse.
"I'm sorry I disobeyed your orders," she said forlornly, staring down at the blanket's bunched up patiches that were piled up around her legs and feet. "When Arthur started screaming, I could not stop myself from trying to assist him. I did not want him to die."
"I would have done the same thing." He said in return. Surprised, Duckie's eyes snapped right back up to meet his as he explained, "I would never expect anyone to ignore someone getting hurt, not if they are able to do something about it. This would have likely gone better for you if you had some weaponry training. We'll have to work on rectifying that."
"You're not angry?" She asked quietly, her gaze lingering on her face as if trying to gage if he was hiding his feelings about that matter. "I thought you would be."
"No, I am not. I am grateful for your story though, as it explains a lot about what I saw at the Haymond's house." Haldir said, choosing to move on from the previous topic as if it was a much more trivial matter that what Duckie had made it out to be. "Their door was all scratched up and warped, just like this one. We will need to find a way to keep the bar from being pushed upward before nightfall."
He then gazed at the gloopy pumpkin mess on the veranda. "You left this out of your story though. How did this mess come to pass?"
Duckie tried to think back to what had happened, but was uncertain of how it happened. She remembered hearing some banging noises outside though before she passed out…
"I am unsure. Let me go ask the plants." She replied, then carefully tiptoed through the mess, lifting her quilt so it didn't drag through the rotten slime before she started to step towards where the pumpkins grew.
As it turned out, she did not have to ask for an answer. Upon approaching them, the empty vines that had contained numerous pumpkins last night called out to her with pride, confirming her suspicions.
"She lives! She lives!"
"You called for help and we answered you!"
"We have sacrificed our fruits to save you!"
"We would never abandon any of the forgotten ones!"
"We love you and your kind! We were happy to help!"
Duckie smiled down at the plants, feeling grateful for what they had done, if not a little confused by their words. She was not sure what they meant by 'forgotten ones,' but did not bother to ask them as she walked reverently down the rows of plants and bent over, letting her fingertips gently brush the tops of the giant leafy vines. The plants cheered and expressed their joy by brushing against her legs and wrapping their little tendrils around her, as if engaging her in a series of tiny hugs as she passed them one by one.
"Thank you all," Duckie whispered quietly, hoping Haldir wasn't listening too closely. "I appreciate your help and your sacrifice. You saved my life with your fruits. I will be sure to save the seeds from them and will grow them next season. You will never be forgotten or lost, my friends." She promised them, smiling as they proclaimed their joy over her promise.
Their thanks rang out behind her as she walked back towards Haldir, once again noticing how tired and worn down his face looked. She wondered when he had last slept, as she knew he had not for at least the last two evenings. Surely he needed to rest at some point, didn't he? She silently worried about him as she climbed up the stairs, clutching the quilt around her to maintain her modesty as she approached him.
"The pumpkins heard me calling for help last night and then took matters into their own hands… er, vines." She answered awkwardly upon seeing his expectant expression.
Haldir's eyebrows raised way up towards his hairline, "Truly? They are the ones who finished off the spider?"
"I believe so." She said, then felt obligated to continue speaking upon seeing the questionable look on his face. "I know it's a bit weird when you are unused to such things, but many plants and trees have come to my aid over the years. They even did when I was a youth." Duckie replied, hoping he didn't find her unique circumstances too unsettling.
"Very well then. I believe you." He said after inspecting her face momentarily. He yawned quietly and then continued, "I plan to take Arthur back to town now while he is still incapacitated—hopefully the venom will affect his memory enough that he thinks the spiders were a dream, rather than reality. After returning, I plan to take some rest in one of the wagons." He said, pointing towards the circle of wagons the elves had abandoned in the neighboring field of grass.
"I am unaccustomed to doing so much healing at once and have exhausted myself tending to you and Arthur's injuries." He explained.
Huh. It was weird to have Haldir, an elf who often seemed invincible, admit to having a weakness. Duckie nodded and quietly replied, "That is fine. You look as though you could use the rest. When will I next see you?"
"Perhaps I could join you for lunch so that we can try and resolve our differences from yesterday evening?" He asked, initiating an uncomfortable feeling between them as they both remembered what had transpired the previous night. When Duckie nodded her head yes, he added, "I will also be sure to fix your door this afternoon so you can rest in safety tonight."
"I would very much appreciate that," she replied, pleased to know that he would continue to assist her. "Thank you."
With a nod and an unusually sad-looking half smile, Haldir turned and unsaddled Tulkas first, leaving all his tack on a clean area of the veranda before reentering the farmhouse. He came back out with Arthur hefted over his shoulder, much in the same way he had carried Ralph Thomas on the night they had first met.
Duckie watched as he carefully laid Arthur facedown upon Tulkas' muscular back and then hopped upon the horse with practiced ease. She tentatively waved to him in silence as he rode away, feeling both awkward about the conversation that she knew needed to happen, while also hoping that Arthur would be okay when he woke up from the venom.
She quickly set about picking up her clothing from the farmhouse property and inspected each piece, creating a pile of clothes that needed mending and a second one for those that were still wearable. Thankfully, her green dress, which was her nicest frock and the one she had planned to have serve as her wedding gown that evening, was untorn and had not been besmirched by the black spider ooze.
Before she could dress herself though, she desperately needed to clean up. She wanted to take a bath, but upon seeing the broken door, one which anyone could walk into at any point in time, Duckie instead settled for cleaning herself up with a small bowl of water and bar of soap. She was careful to only expose one part of herself at a time, hurrying the process along just in case Haldir returned early for some reason.
Duckie had already been thoroughly embarrassed earlier when he saw her legs and undergarments, not to mention when had touched her inner thigh to heal her bruise. The last thing she needed was for him to walk in and see her naked! She turned as red as a beet at the very thought.
Once she was dressed and the dark tendrils of her hair were braided appropriately over her ears, Duckie set about the painstaking task of picking several pumpkin seeds out of the gooey mess on the front porch. She rinsed the seeds and then took them into the cellar behind the farmhouse, laying them out in a cool and dry spot on one of the empty shelves to dry upon an old rag.
Upon returning from the cellar, she noticed that Haldir had returned to the wagon train, as Tulkas' halter was newly tied to one of the far wagons in the circle which filled the field across from her property. As she set about cleaning up the pumpkin mess on the front porch, she idly wondered to herself what she would say to him concerning their argument the previous night.
While Duckie had been very upset at his opinion of the mortals, she knew she had pushed him to say what he said and had been the instigator of the row. She would need to apologize for that, as he likely would have never said such things if she had not asked about her aunt, the very topic which had started the argument.
She could not help but wonder what had caused Haldir to feel thusly about the mortals though. What precisely had he witnessed that gave him this opinion? Was that even the cause of it or was it something else? Was he simply wearying from living in the world too long, as his brothers had implied?
Duckie often felt old already at 54 years of age and could hardly begin to imagine what it must feel like to Haldir, who had lived for thousands of years. What kinds of things had he seen and heard in all of those years? What kinds of darkness had he witnessed as he made his way across the mortal realms?
Once the pumpkin mess was swept off the porch and the goo was painstakingly scrubbed away, Duckie found herself wondering what to do about lunch for herself and Haldir. She had never done much with cooking and was uncertain of what Haldir might like to eat, though he had not seemed particularly picky about food thus far…
What could she make for him? Her father had done most of the cooking, while Duckie had always done her part to clean up after meals. This arrangement had worked for them for decades and she had never once thought she would be in a position where she needed to cook on her own. Thinking back to the many years she had spent with her father, Duckie did remember watching him cook several times and then decided to try and make pancakes, as it was a recipe she had seen him make countless times.
The batter came together easily enough, with the combination of eggs, flour, salt, milk, saleratus, and a bit of sugar. After building a decent fire in the woodburning stove, Duckie set about melting a bit of butter in a pan. Though it had melted much more quickly than she remembered, she went ahead and put a scoop of batter in the pan and then wandered away from the stove for a moment, as a terrible smell had caught the attention of her nose.
Upon walking over to the door, she nearly ran into Haldir, who came around from the side of the veranda, rather than from the stairway. "Oh!" She exclaimed, stepping back in surprise. "You scared me. I did not hear you approach."
Immediately, Duckie's nose scrunched up and she had to swallow her own bile down, as the smell was getting stronger now that she was near the door. "Goodness, what is that foul stench on the air this morning? I have never smelled anything like it out here before!" She complained, fanning the air beside her nose while grimacing.
"It is the spider." Haldir replied calmly, his steady gaze meeting her eyes. "Both of the ones from last night, actually. I pulled them onto the burn pile behind the barn and set fire to them. The smell should not linger long, as the fire is already dying down back there."
Duckie nodded, knowing that something would have to be done with the beasts to conceal their existence. Indeed, she could see a plume of smoke rising from behind the barn. "Good riddance." She thought to herself as goosebumps lined her arms as she remembered fighting the thing off with her father's dagger.
Turning her eyes back to Haldir, she could see that he was looking much better than he had earlier. The look of tiredness was gone from his fair face and he had put on a clean outfit. Now he wore a pair of brown pants and a dark red shirt, along with same the black suspenders he had worn the previous night. His hair was braided into a long, single braid that trailed down his entire spine before ending just before the top of his pants. The top of his hair was covered with the black hat that seemed to be fond of wearing.
"You are looking well," he said quietly, more closely observing her now that he was feeling better. "Did I manage to heal everything that was ailing you?"
"Yes, I am fine now. Are you well? You looked as if you were about to pass out when I last saw you and I know you only had a couple of hours to rest." She asked in return.
"I am much better now—thank you for asking. I'm afraid I have aged enough that I need very little rest to recover from my endeavors. You will find as you get older that you need less and less rest to recover yourself too. It's one of the many perks of immortality." He replied, then stepped into the farmhouse when Duckie nodded and gestured for him to enter.
Heading back to the stove after ushering Haldir inside, Duckie found that a burning smell was coming from her frying pan too. Upon flipping the pancake over, she found that it was completely black on the first side and hard as a piece of charcoal.
"Oh no," she moaned and then painstakingly scraped what was left of the pancake onto a plate. "I've failed again. There doesn't seem to be a single thing I can do correctly." She muttered to herself in discouragement, dropping the spatula back into the pan and placing her hand over her eyes in frustration. She huffed and shook her head as she felt hot tears start to well up within her eyes.
What Haldir must think of her! A helpless case! A worthless child who required endless amounts of help and had nothing to offer himself or his soldiers…
A burden.
"Dúcuivië?" An astonished voice questioned from behind her, though she did not turn to acknowledge its owner. "Why are you disparaging yourself over such a small thing? It is just a burnt pancake."
"It is much more than that, Haldir." She whimpered, her voice coming out higher than normal and sounding rather emotional.
"What do you mean?" He asked with a tinge of panic in his voice.
"I feel like I always need help, like I cannot do anything for myself! I want to be a contributing member of your group of elves, not someone who constantly takes and takes and has nothing to give in return!" She cried, staring downward as she used her hand to wipe the tears from her eyes before covering them up again. She felt utterly miserable and defeated.
Though she could not see it, she heard Haldir approach her slowly and felt when he reached out to take her free hand in his own. He guided her to a chair and seated her at the table, then sat down across from her. He did not let go of her hand, extending his arm across the table to maintain his hold when he crossed to the other side. When he sat down, his other hand rested gently on top of her own.
"Dúcuivië, I certainly hope I have not implied you are not contributing, as that is not how I feel about you. You have things to offer us and have already done your part, even when it has not been asked of you! You helped save the child that night in the forest and comforted him easily enough. Our portion of the rescue would have been much more difficult if you had not freed him and sent him away from those goons before we intervened." He recounted, then paused. Duckie peeked through her fingers for a moment and noticed that he looked a bit uncertain. Eventually, he spoke once again.
"Last night you told me something that I think I've needed to hear for a while: that my opinion of mortals is inappropriate," he confessed, the volume of his voice quieting substantially. "Not even my brothers have dared say that to my face, though I have suspected they have thought about it many times." He said, appearing a bit distant. Duckie slowly lowered her hand and stared at him as he seemed to become lost in his thoughts.
"Why do you feel this way about them Haldir? What caused this?" Duckie asked quietly, wishing to understand the situation he found himself in more thoroughly. Even though she had acted poorly the previous night, she desperately hoped he would choose to open up to her once more.
He was silent for an off-putting amount of time before finally whispering in a dark tone, "Valais."
Duckie's eyebrows went up in question and asked, "What is Valais?"
"A place in France… a place of great darkness. The things I saw there… it was worse than any war I've ever witnessed. Men and women accusing one another of being witches and sorcerers… People being arrested and tried unfairly," he recanted, a tear appearing in his eye, "Burned alive at the stake if they confessed and tortured if they did not."
He looked up then and caught her eye without blinking, "Most eventually confessed to end the torture, whether they were guilty or not and ended up dying anyway. They preferred to die than to continue enduring pilliwinks, branks, and other such devices of torment."
A haunted look appeared in his silver eyes and Duckie struggled to continue to listen to him as a horrible picture formed in her mind. "Hundreds of innocents died this way. Helpless people, including the elderly and widows… even children. It was a dark time for the race of man… yet, news has reached my ears of other instances of this. The same horrors, they have happened here in America too." He said, then whispered, "History keeps repeating itself with men… They never remember their past. They always seem to be cursed to repeat their wrongs. It is a terrible thing to bear witness to."
Pain-filled silence lingered between them both as they simultaneously stared at the table. Duckie could now understand his opinion, as she had not lived to see such times. Rumors of such things had found her ears too and she was saddened to find out they were true. Moreover, she was hurt that Haldir had witnessed it firsthand.
"I'm sorry Haldir. I cannot even begin to imagine witnessing such a thing..." She eventually whispered, giving his limp hand a squeeze from across the table.
"I do not understand the minds of men, how they can justify such things… It is hard to forget the screams, the unfairness, the hopelessness of it all… Hundreds of years later, it still lingers in my mind like a pestilence." He said, pausing before finally meeting her eyes with a deathly serious look upon his face.
"You were right though. I should not hold it against them all. It is unfair. While I cannot promise to never think such thoughts again, I will promise you that I will strive to look beyond my past memories of men and live more in the present. I promise to do my best to search for good from now on, rather than assume the worst, for both your sake and theirs. Of this, you have my word." He vowed solemnly.
Duckie was shocked by his words and it took her a moment to realize that her mouth was hanging open in show of it. A warm feeling filled her heart as she realized that he was going to try and make this right for her and for the mortals.
"Thank you. That means a lot to me." She whispered in reply. When he smiled back at her in reply, she smiled too, touched by his words and the lingering truth in his eyes.
"Let us try fill your mind with pleasant memories of the mortals—so many that there is no room for anything else." She replied with a nod, her eyes large and practically dripping with emotion. "I will help show you their worth. They will prove it, if you but watch them and search for their intrinsic goodness."
"You are filled with the hope I have been lacking." He said after a pregnant pause, staring into her eyes with a strange expression on his face. "Thank you for sharing it with me."
Duckie said nothing, but smiled in response, happy to have found a way to help him after all. After a few minutes of silence, she watched as Haldir's face became neutral once more. He pushed his chair back, stood up, and then went over to inspect the stove.
"The fire in the stove is burning too hot for pancakes, but we can cool it down a bit and then finish cooking the remaining batter. It is not a problem." She heard his voice assess, cool and calm as ever, as if the previous conversation had not just occurred.
Haldir closed the stove's damper a bit to lower the temperature, then set about melting another small glob of butter in the pan. Duckie watched and listened as he showed her how much batter to put in the pan and then pointed out how to watch for bubbles in the middle of each pancake before flipping them over. The two they made while working together were fried to a sweet, golden perfection.
Duckie finished cooking the remaining two pancakes while sending Haldir to the cellar for some salted pork to serve alongside it. He returned with both that and a couple of apples from the orchard, which he quickly peeled and thinly sliced. When the pancakes were done, he cooked the slices in some remaining butter with a small sprinkling of brown sugar, then put a small pile of them on both stacks of pancakes. A pot of black coffee was quickly brewed alongside it and their hearty meal was served.
Both elves ate peacefully while occasionally smiling when their eyes unexpectedly met. While it was a quiet meal, the silence between them felt comfortable. Duckie had felt the same way during meals with her own father when both had spent a lot of time together and had run out of things to say. The same dynamic seemed to be shared between her and Haldir. She was grateful that the air had been cleared between them so they could coexist in harmony once again.
"Will Arthur recover quickly?" She finally asked him as she set her fork down, having finished her last bite of pork.
Haldir finished drinking the last dregs of his coffee before answering, "Well, I imagine that if he has not awakened by now, he will within the next hour or two. I only hope his memory is a bit off and that he doesn't remember the spider. I told Father John and the local doctor that he had been knocked out trying to save you from the wildcat. If he remembers everything, it will be my word against his, which does not bode well for us. Should he ask you about it anytime soon, make sure you assure him that it was the wildcat. Do not accept any other possibility from him." He stated with a very serious face and a firm tone that left no room for questioning.
"I can do that," she said with a nod, hoping that she had enough details to match up her own story with the one he had already woven. "What did you say he did to save me?"
"I just said he had saved you, but pretended that I did not know the details because I had rushed him to the town doctor when I found you both this morning. I kept it purposefully vague so you could tell the tale as you desired. Let me know what you come up with and I will confirm your tale to anyone who brings it up with me." He said, taking up a bucket from beside the door. "I will fetch a pail of well water for the dishes."
"Thank you," she replied as she cleared the table, trying to dream up some kind of story that would be believable about Arthur saving her. After all, Arthur was not a hunter, nor known for his strength or cunning abilities. He was known for his knowledge, so it could not be something overly physical or violent…
Arthur had been bruised up a bit though, not to mention impaled in the back by the beast's stinger. She wasn't quite sure how to address that. Perhaps someone would believe it was a mark from a claw or a tooth?
When Haldir brought the water in, he set the bucket on the stove to warm it up a bit while Duckie used a rag to wipe the table off. "I think I will say that he heard me scream when I caught sight of the wildcat by the clothesline and then tried to usher me inside the house first, but was attacked by the beast before he could get inside. That would at least explain the scratch marks on the door…" She said, trailing off as she looked up at him to see if he agreed with her lie. A singular nod towards her established his confirmation before the two set about doing the dishes.
After finishing the dishes, both went to work separately. Duckie tended to the harvest while Haldir worked on fixing the door so it would latch and experimented with a couple of solutions that would prevent another spider from lifting up the door latch from the outside.
Duckie idly watched him as she made trip after trip to and from the barn. Haldir's well-trained hands easily hammered and sanded the wood back into its former glory with tools he had found in the barn. She could tell from his ease of motion that he had likely worked several jobs requiring him to use tools proficiently in the past. Once he had finished the job, he went back to the wagon train in and Duckie did not see him again until the evening. After another hour of harvesting, she had retired to the farmhouse to wash up and change before the wedding.
Her best gown was dyed a deep, forest green and had large pagoda sleeves with poofy, white engageantes beneath them, each one cuffing comfortably at her wrist. She had attached her fanciest lace collar to the high neckline, right at the top of the row of intricate golden buttons that lined her chest. A black and white belt adorned her waist before the dress flowed out generously under her four layers of petticoats, the lacy bottoms of which peaked out from beneath her dress.
She had spent a very long time on her hair, uncertain of how fancy she should make it look for an occasion like this. Duckie knew that the people of Wyoming were not nearly as refined as the people of the east whom she had grown up around. She found herself uncertain of what would be acceptable until she thought back to the few settlement weddings she had attended in the company of her father.
Duckie had settled on taking her dark strands of hair and making a chignon at the base of her head It was then covered with a tan netting made from ribbons, which her father had gifted her for formal occasions. She had left two plaits of her thick hair loose at the bottom of the chignon though and had dampened them with water, then meticulously combed them out and wrapped them in some rags she had in her trunk. When they felt dry, she had two perfect ringlets of curls, which she draped over her shoulder delicately.
With the addition of her small golden droplet earrings and a porcelain broach that was lined with gold and contained a tiny painting of a pink rose, Duckie felt as well dressed as she would ever be to wed Haldir. She found herself feeling rather nervous though and noticed that she would not need to pinch her cheeks in order to achieve a lovely blush this evening when she last looked into the mirror.
Was this going to be an uncomfortable affair? Would she truly be able to look him in the eyes and say the vows she needed the mortals to believe without faltering? Could she get the mortals to believe there were real feelings between them?
Needing to do something with her hands to keep them occupied, Duckie found herself wearing a thimble and pushing a needle and thread through the seam of her ripped brown calico dress from the previous night. While it didn't calm the nervous pounding of her heart, it did keep her busy for about 20 minutes or so, which was when she heard him knock upon the door.
Her trembling hands gently set her sewing project down on the table and then she made her way over to the door. When she opened it, she found a very serious looking Haldir standing before her. He was wearing his black pants once again, but had on a much more formal top than before. A well-starched, white button-down shirt and black cravat was covered with a navy vest, which was made of a satin-like material that shined in the light of the setting sun. A golden pocket watch chain ran across his middle and was covered by a long and loose-fitting overcoat made of black wool. She spotted his ever-present gun holsters peaking out from the inside of the coat, as was his golden sheriff's badge, which was clipped to his vest even now.
Haldir's smooth, silver-blonde hair was still plated behind him in the single braid he had worn earlier along with his black hat. His eyes met hers gently and then he greeted her in silence, with a nod. Duckie nodded back and then watched as he reached into his coat pocket to fish something out.
"I have the rings." He said, opening his hand to reveal two of the most beautiful rings Duckie had ever seen. Both were hewn from gold and had the shape of a large leaf and acorn on the top of them. Each had masterful details, such as veins of gold spiking through the leaf and an intricate, bumpy texture on the top of the acorn cap.
"They are beautiful…" She said, kneeling down a bit to get a closer look at the fine workmanship. "Are these made by the elves?"
"Yes, they were my parents' wedding rings. My brothers decided I should have them after they passed from this world." He said quietly, fiddling with the smaller of the two a bit as he held them out in his palm.
"Oh goodness Haldir, I cannot wear that. What if I lost it? I would never be able to forgive myself." She said with a shake of her head, clearly worried about keeping track of an item that was a meaningful family heirloom to him.
"It is of elvish make," he said, as if that made it somehow okay, before stopping to explain. "That means it is imbued with magic and will fit to whatever finger it is placed on. It will never fall off on its own. The owner must remove the ring themselves to get it to come off." He clarified, gently taking one of her hands into his own and sliding the ring onto her pointer finger.
The ring felt weirdly malleable for a couple of seconds, then slid on firmly and stayed, though it had previously been a bit smaller. "Oh," Haldir said rather abruptly, sounding a bit embarrassed, "Wrong finger. I am glad I made the mistake here, rather than in front of the mortals."
He signaled for her to remove the ring from her finger and then quickly slid it onto her fourth finger instead. At first the ring felt too loose, but in a matter of seconds it tightened and adhered to her finger comfortably. "Oh my, the magic of the elves is certainly meant to impress, isn't it?" She said in awe as she examined the ring more closely, having never pictured such a thing in her life.
"It is quite helpful, isn't it?" He replied, then signaled for her to return the ring to him now that it had been sized to her finger. "Are you all ready for this evening?"
"Yes," she muttered with a quiet nod before looking down at her feet. "I am ready."
"You are nervous," he said after a quick assessment of her. "Let me show you what I intend to do so there are no surprises."
"Once you walk down the church aisle to me, you will stand in front of me and we will hold hands," he said lightly, taking each of her hands within his after dropping the rings back into his pocket, "like this."
"We will both confidently look into one another's eyes while repeating the mortal vows. You will put the larger ring on my fourth finger and I will put the smaller one on yours." He continued, staring into her eyes to make sure she was getting all of this. She gave him a nod as she secretly hoped he could not tell precisely how nervous all of this was making her.
"When he tells me to kiss you," he started, making Duckie's heart beat twice as vigorously as she held his gaze, "I will step closer and run my hand down your face." He said and then softly did as he said. The pads of his fingers left a tingling trail down the side of her cheek as his hand came to rest just below her chin.
"Keep your eyes upon mine," he instructed as she started to look downward. Duckie blinked a couple of and then met his silver eyes again, barely able to breathe as she became terribly aware of how near in proximity he stood. She could practically feel his body heat, though his hand was the only part that touched her.
His voice was light and wispy when he finally announced, "I will come really close to your lips and whisper that I love you."
And with that being said, he leaned his head down a bit so that his lips were only an inch away from hers. She could feel his soft breath lightly blowing upon her face as he exhaled. A shiver went down her spine as she heard him whisper the very words she had been thinking about all day, "And then I will lean down and kiss you."
Duckie's breath caught in her mouth as her heart pounded like a hammer on hot steel. She braced herself in anticipation, fully expecting him to lean downward and complete the ritual he was describing. Her eyes instinctively closed as she awaited it, but then opened them when it did not come.
He started down at her with a gentle affection showing from deep within the depths of his silver pools as his other hand gently cupped her blazing cheek. In a quiet tone, he promised, "I will be gentle with you and I will linger near your face for a few moments after we are done, so it looks as though I do not wish to part from you. Be sure to smile at me afterwards, so the kiss appears to have been joyfully received."
Oh, Duckie was certain that would not be a problem, especially if he looked at her the way he was right now. She could not bring her lips to form an answer though, so she simply nodded beneath his tender grasp and then showed him the best smile she could muster while under her current state of mental duress.
"That will do," he said, returning her smile warmly and then slowly standing back up to his full height. Even as he stepped back away from her and let go of her face, the air lingering between them continued to feel rife with tension. However, Duckie was able to release the breath she hadn't realized she was holding.
The two stood a few feet away from one another, both thinking to themselves in silence for a little while before Haldir finally spoke. "Can I count on you to help me carry out these actions?"
"Yes," she said as thoughts of the almost-kiss continued to run wildly through her brain, "I think I can do this, so long as I keep my head on straight."
"You'll be fine," he said, trying to reassure her. "You have a good head on your shoulders. You proved it last night with your acting and you'll prove it again this evening too. I'm most assured of it." He said with complete confidence, then motioned for her to follow him to the wagon that he had hitched to Tulkas.
Duckie followed him slowly through the grass, not feeling nearly as confident, but knowing that she needed to go through with this. Whatever happened now was up to her and she needed to make this ploy a success.
With a common goal in mind, both started down the bumpy pathway while sitting side by side on the wagon. Together, they rode in silent solidarity towards a moment that would entwine their destinies indefinitely.
ooOoo
*saleratus was a leavening agent that was used before baking soda
*Valais France was the location of one of the first large scale witch hunts in Europe. More than 200 accused witches and sorcerers were burned at the stake between 1428 and 1430.
So, I know there have been rumors many times about shutting down. I don't know if this current one is true or not, but I do know that features on the writer's end of the account have not worked for nearly a month now and there has been no news given regarding any of it being fixed. Should it come down to it, please know that this story can also be accessed on AO3 under the penname Ponytail_Goddess.
Please let me know what you thought of the latest chapter! One delightfully fake wedding will be coming your way with the next update! I hope you're looking forward to it as much as me! Have a wonderful day!
-P.G.