Author Note: This is another story off the old jump drive I wrote a long time back. I took a bit of time to clean it up and reformat it. I was in a rather sad and depressed place judging by the date timestamp on the original. I'm better now but there are many who are not. Please if you are feeling depressed or suicidal get help. Its not always possible to macho your way out and bull through it. I have seen some of the toughest most macho men I would follow into hell itself crawl in a bottle and never come out. You are not alone in the US if you need help and don't want to speak to a local group call the national hotline. I'm not sure what other countries numbers are but I am sure they have them.

In the US call 1-800-273-8255 they can help.

Warning: This is a sad story. It does not exactly have a happy ending. Its message I guess is that no matter how bad you think you have it if you look you can find the light in the darkness. You just have to try and not give up. As usual I am Rahmota not Rowling. I own nothing. I claim nothing.

It had been ten years since Harry Potter had last set foot in the U.K. It had been ten years since he last spoke with Ronald Weasley. He still remembered the final argument that ended everything.

It had been two years after the end of the war, the last and final battle that had saved the wizarding world. Hermione was still having trouble finding a job in the ministry due to lingering blood purity laws and blood bigotry. The cultural stagnation had been allowed to take too strong a hold for the world to change overnight, even after a cataclysmic battle.

Hermione had come to Harry and Ron to ask them to help her find her parents in Australia. Harry had called his supervisor at the Auror office and immediately requested an open ended sabbatical. He had to go all the way to Kingsley to get it but he was not going to abandon Hermione not after all she had done for him in his entire life so far. He owed her too much.

Ron on the other hand was not as willing to go on a wild goose hunt as he called it. They were just a couple of muggles in a muggle country and they would be alright Ron had told Hermione. In front of Ginny, Harry, Neville and Luna when she brought everyone for dinner. The fact that everyone moved out of blast radius should have been Ron's clue to stop talking but he had always been a bit slow on the perception skills.

Hermione had blasted him verbally in front of everyone. Telling him that their relationship was over. That she understood why Luna and Neville couldn't come. Luna being 6 months along with Neville's child and him dealing with his Herbology Masters and ascension to his titles due to the death of his family. She understood that but a no talent loser like Ron who had nothing going on in his life had no excuse to help her. He blustered and fumed and they screamed. The argument escalating until Ron finally shoved Hermione so hard she fell down. That crossed the line and started harry screaming at him once he was assured Hermione was okay. Within the next half hour Ron had been bodily tossed through the door of Grimmould place. Harry supposed he should have opened it first but in his anger he missed a step. What was sad was that Hermione had been correct about Ron.

He had tried getting into the Auror Academy but as they did not allow outside help on the tests and his lack of magical skills he failed. He blamed Harry for not doing more to use his fame to help. Fame that Harry tried to explain to him for the millionth time he did not like or want. Ron just scoffed and said what good is fame if you can't use it.

Ron had tried getting a position on any Quidditch team based on his decent ability in the school league. Unfortunately he was not able to compete at the pro levels. Even his beloved Chudley Cannons turned him down. So he wound up working the joke shop with his brother George. One of the few Weasley children left.
Bill had been mauled to death by Fenrir. His throat ripped out in combat but Bill had at least taken Fenrir with him. Charlie was in Romania according to Ginny, married and with several cute kids. Percy and Fred had died in the battle. On opposing sides as Percy never looked back and fell into the blood bigotry crap pit. Believing that the wizarding world needed the strong hand of order more than it needed freedom.

Harry sighed in the passenger seat of the rental car watching the countryside roll by. His thoughts turning towards Ginny. After the war they had gotten back together. Making a real go of it they had moved into Grimmould together. When he said he was going to go help Hermione find her parents she had not tried to talk him out of it. She had let him go with her love and the warning that she wouldn't wait forever. She had gone off and joined the Holyhead Harpies and become a professional Quidditch Player.

He on the other hand went to Australia with Hermione. They managed to find her parents rather quickly, only after a few months of searching. They were living in a suburb of Melbourne having had total recall they managed to get things straightened out with the government so they would not be in trouble. Amazingly they had made contact with the magical world of Australia showing how intelligent and determined they were.

Hermione had wanted to stay to rebuild her life with them. She had been a horrible daughter she felt even if her parents understood and loved her. Harry had discovered a reason to stay as well. Australia had never heard of Voldemort or the Boy-who-lived or anything to do with the blood purity movement. Down here he was just nothing but Harry James Potter. So he transferred his wealth, his citizenship and sold Grimmould Place. Kreacher having passed to the school so that Minerva would have to deal with him. Harry was finishing a healer's apprenticeship and would be declared fully certified when he got back.

Along the way over the last ten years though he and Hermione started dating. They didn't call it that at first, just friends having dinner and talking about life. Her job with the Australian Ministry in their Muggle Liaison office. Not a dead end like in the U.K. but a full fledged important place keeping the balance and peace between the two worlds. Her job was helping the schools find and contact muggle-borns and their integration into the wizarding world without losing their footing in the mundane world. Eventually though they realized that they were dating, that their feelings for each other were more than siblings, more than friends. They had fallen in love.

Ginny must have sensed it from Harry's letters. When she wrote to tell him about the guy she had met he had expected to be hurt or sad or something but he felt relieved that she was happier. He had not been a good match for her and they both realized it. Her new boyfriend was a reporter for a sports magazine following Quidditch. He had written an article about her aggressive tendencies in the sky and how she was like a Valkyrie which she found funny then impressed, when he began to court her. They had been married a year ago although her letters said she was not going to have kids for a few more years until her career started winding up.

Harry felt the car turning onto the road to the Burrow. He looked at his wife and smiled, her Brown hair pulled back in a tight plait on her back, her chocolate brown eyes scanning the road as she drove carefully and attentively. She must have felt his smile as she glanced at him with a grin.

He sat up and started getting ready to face the friends and people that were expecting them.

Neville and Luna had remained their best friends. They had come to Australia either singly in pursuit of their respective careers, Luna a magi-zoologist and Neville an herbologist, or together as a family with their kids. Luna and her fair skin though having to have sunscreen applied liberally or she would burn hideously. Neville though just turned as brown and tanned as any digger in the outback.

As they came into the yard of the New Burrow Harry saw several cars parked around. Including a Ford Escort that flickered every now and again into translucency Harry shook his head at. Arthur even though he was beginning to get trouble with his magic still liked to tinker. The healers had said it was a neurological condition that had never recovered much from the venom Nagini had injected into him.

Parking the car Hermione took a deep breath and squeezed Harry's hand. "You ready to deal with this?"

"I guess."

"Well it'll be alright. I'll be with you."
"Forever and a day." Harry said with a smile.

"Well lets go."

Getting out he ran around to the other side to help his six months pregnant wife out of the car. She glared at him and insisted she was not crippled just pregnant. He wisely backed off but stood nearby. Taking her arm once they were both standing they walked to the door.

Ginny opened it before they even got close. She came walking out looking sad but lovely. Her eyes red from crying but bright looking at Harry and Hermione walking up arm in arm.

"Hey guys. You look radiant Hermione."

"Thanks I feel like a barrel."
They shared a laugh as they hugged. "Well it could be worse. Could be twins."

"Oh don't make me laugh girl this one's pressing on my bladder enough. Where's the WC."

"Inside and down the hall on the right. Ask Lavender she's inside with Mom."

Hermione went in after giving Harry a pat on the arm.

"So how're you handling her?"

"Very carefully. Her hormones have her ready to hex me into the next twelve dimensions one minute and the next she wants to tear my clothes off."

"So nothing unusual for you then."

"No I guess not. You handling this ok?"

She shrugged, "As okay as I can be I guess. Dave's been a big help. So has the team. We're like a big family. Geraldine gave me as long off as I need."
"Well that's good. So Lavender's here?"

"Yeah and she brought Artie. Dad's having a good day so he's entertaining the little guy."

"Yeah. So uh we should go in."

"Yeah."

=====xxxxx====

Molly made a fuss over Harry. Saying he looked like he wasn't eating enough and how he looked wonderful in his suit. Then she broke down and hugged him crying until George pulled her off of him and she stepped into the kitchen.

Hermione was sitting on the couch talking to Ron's ex-wife Lavender. They had gotten together a couple years after Harry and Hermione had left. A year later they were married and had a son together a year after that. They had named him Arthur Frederick which made the family happy. Unfortunately things didn't work out and three years later Lavender had moved out and filed for divorce. Nobody talked about it but from some of Neville's letters apparently Ron had not been entirely good to Lavender. Expecting her to give up her charms professorship at Hogwarts and be a good dutiful housewife popping out several more kids. Hermione had shaken her head at that saying she had dodged a bullet.

"Hey Lavender how's it going?"
"Okay. You never expect these things to happen, even after all we went through."
"Yeah I know. Is Artie handling it well?"
"For the most part. He understands his dad is not going to see him anymore. We haven't told him exactly what happened just that he's with Uncle Fred."

Harry glanced over to Molly's wonderful clock and the missing hands. Ron, Percy, Fred, Bill all faded and gone from the face. The others all showing home except for Charlie which showed traveling.

He smiled to see that it still had his and Hermione's on there.

"So what really did happen. Ginny didn't exactly say in her letter."

Lavender looked into the kitchen where Molly was making something to eat with Ginny, then out the window where George, Arthur, a tall blonde man and a six year old were watching a pair of gnomes running around chasing a gizmo from the shop.

Sighing she leaned in closely with a low voice, "He overdosed on some muggle drugs. He had been drinking and I guess he got them thinking they would make him feel better or something and he overdosed."

Hermione looked at her in shock, "What? Why would he do that?"
"George and him had been fighting about the shop, and other stuff. George had begun dating Millicent Bulstrode a few months ago and Ron didn't like that. George was also talking about taking the shop into a different direction. Not so much jokes but serious magic items and stuff too."
"Wow. So Ron couldn't handle that. It doesn't sound like that was enough for Ron to do that."

Lavender shrugged. "I dunno harry. Ron and I drifted apart long ago. I thought having a kid would make him take responsibility but it just made him more resentful of the attention I was giving Artie. That I wasn't ready to pop out another one just like that."
"Wow. So is it serious with Millicent?"

"I think so. She's turned out pretty good. She runs the coffee shop they put into Flourish and Blotts."

"Wow. So they actually modernized?"

"Some. Things have been changing. Its been a bit painful and slow but it's been happening. Draco has allied himself with Shacklebolt to bring down a lot of the old guard in the Wizengamut that still clung to the old ways. His new wife probably has something to do with that."
"Oh who'd he marry?"

"Believe it or not he married Hannah Abbot."

"Hannah the tall blonde from Hufflepuff?"

"Yeah she runs the canteen in the ministry building and he works there as well as sits on the Gamut so they just fell in love. I saw it in the society pages a year ago that they got married."

"Wow we're a bit out of touch."

"Well see what living on the other side of the world does for you?"

======xxxxx=====

Dinner that evening was subdued and yet cheerful event. Harry met David Pierce Ginny's husband. He was a nice guy with a good sense of humor and loved Ginny. They both shared a passion for the game of Quidditch among other things that Harry found tolerable but not as big a deal.

Charlie had been picked up at the portkey receiving by David. He was tanned and healthy looking. Soon he and Luna talked shop about Dragons and other creatures. Luna's son Phoebus listening intently as he made a toy dragon float randomly around the room.

Neville had brought some herbs for Molly and she appreciated it. Harry realizing he had forgotten to bring anything was relieved to see that Hermione as always was thinking ahead and pulled a bottle of mineral waters from Australia and a bit of aboriginal medicines for her to try. Molly hugged her in gratitude.

Harry's healer training let him know that Arthur was not good. His hands shook and he looked drawn and haggard. His nerves had begun to break down Ginny had finally told him after dinner. When he got bit by Nagini so many years ago the venom had changed some of the chemicals inside his nerves in his brain. The healers had managed to block the effects but they had not been able to reverse them. This caused a magical breakdown similar to Parkinson's in muggles as his nerves began to erode and decay from the inside. One of the downsides of a magical physiology was that magical diseases were usually a lot worse than muggle ones.

Ginny said they knew he didn't have much longer but they would do the best they could for him. Harry expressed his sympathies and hoped they would keep in touch about him.

=====xxxxx=====

Even though Molly had insisted on them staying at the Burrow Harry and Hermione said they would not impose and would stay with Neville and Luna at their estate just across town. Luna had turned the Rookery into a magical creature preserve and herbal garden.

"So you've been close to the situation what really happened with Ron?" Harry asked after Hermione said she was going to go to bed. It had been along day and she was wiped. He tucked her in and she said if he wanted to sit up and chat with Neville and Luna he could. She felt how he was feeling emotional.

Neville sat the glass of wine down and looked at Luna. She shrugged, "Well after Lavender left him and filed for divorce he just kinda got into a funk. Then last year George and Millicent started dating. She'll be at the funeral tomorrow."

"That's what set him off?"

Luna shook her head, "No not really. Ginny told me that George planned to bring Millicent in as a co-owner and not Ron. Apparently they are incredibly serious with each other."

"Wow she must have changed."

"She has Harry. She's a lot nicer and better than she was in school." Neville said quietly.

"So wasn't Ron still going to be working at the store?"

"Probably not after the last row with George. I walked in on that one with Phoebus. It was in the middle of the store and everything. Ron never really got over his hatred and mistrust of Slytherins." Luna swirled the wine in her glass like it would tell her the secrets of the universe.

=====xxxxx=====

Harry snuggled into bed with his wife. Holding her close and gentle. The new life inside her making him smile in spite of the sad confusion he felt.

He had a dream about the past. About their times at school. How much they had been friends and cared. How even when Ron went stomping off he eventually came back.

When Harry woke up he remembered that dream and sat in bed staring at the wall. This time when they separated they never came back. They never spoke again and now they never would again. Ron had been his first friend in the wizarding world his age. He had stood beside him against Voldemort. And in the end they had walked away from each other and never looked back. Harry had started over in Australia. Ron had stalled out here. He never knew.

Hermione came over and sat beside him on the bed, "Hey Earth to Harry you with me?"

Harry looked up into her dark chocolate eyes, "Always Mione. But I was just thinking about Ron."

"Oh what about?"

"How he always came back. How we was always the Golden Trio. Then suddenly we weren't."

She rubbed his hand as she looked down at the floor. Her other hand lightly resting on her swollen belly. Finally she sighed and said gently, "Harry you can't save everyone, especially from themselves. Ron chose to walk the path he took. I talked to Ginny and Lavender and Luna. They all tried to get him to get him to go to the healers to therapy, to Alcoholics Anonymous. Anything to get him back. He just kept pulling away. They didn't know what to do. He made a few half-hearted attempts to get help but they fell through. He stopped going or just said he was fine and didn't need it."
Harry swallowed hard, "Maybe if I'd tried. It would have mattered." He said looking up at her face.

"He was pretty adamant about not wanting to hear from you. That you were dead to him."

"I know. But I've been dead before."

She smirked slightly at that, "Yeah but you had a get out of jail card. Harry. Ron. Things with Ron. I tried to write him when Ginny told me about him and Lavender getting married."

Harry looked up, "you never told me that."

She shrugged, "You were at the hardest point in your healer training. You were stressing out and I didn't want to add to it with, with the way he responded."

"It was that bad?"
"He spent the money time and effort to send an international howler telling me to go and get stuffed and never to contact him again. Among a few other choice words that I won't repeat."

"Oh."

"Yeah. Now we better get ready for the funeral. We're riding with the Longbottoms. They wanted us to come with them. I think Luna can sense you're going to be an emotional wreck."

"Yeah what about you?"

She dabbed at her eyes already, "I am hormonal. I have an excuse." She gave a weak smile.

=====xxxxx=====

They arrived at the small cemetery on the hill over Ottery. The Weasley plot in the back corner under a willow tree.

Blaise Zabini performed the services as he was fresh from seminary. He said the usual words and platitudes. He gave a brief eulogy about Ron but seemed to be trying to find positive things about him to say. Finally the last words were spoken and the first handfuls of dirt thrown in covering Ron's mortal remains forever.

Looking around Harry saw a few more of their friends from school but not many. Millicent was on George's arm. She had filled out in places and thinned down in others. Her features evening out in such a way that she would never be called a classical beauty but she was a good looking woman. What was the most amazing was her personality change. She was a primary school teacher and worked with special needs children. She had completely changed her self after the war realizing the old ways had failed.

George and her had met at a muggle toy show and hit it off. He said he was going to ask her to marry him soon and he hoped Harry and Hermione would come back for that.

The dinner after the funeral saw Ginny have to take Molly to her room and give her a calming draught as she finally broke down after trying to be strong, trying to be the rock of her family.

=====xxxxx====

Harry and Hermione spent a few days helping out around the Burrow. Doing what they could but eventually they had to return to Australia. They said their goodbyes and promised to try and keep in touch, knowing that life moved on no matter what they said.

Harry watched the Burrow out of the back window as Hermione drove them away. Ginny and her husband stood there waving goodbye. Their fair wells to Luna and Neville already tended to at breakfast. He thought about the things people had said about Ron's death. How it was such a surprise. How he could have made something if he had only applied himself. How sad it was he had fallen so far. Harry tried to shake his head free of those thoughts and focus on the trip home. Traveling by portkey was dangerous for pregnant women so they were going by muggle plane again. He would have plenty of time on the plane to be maudlin.

=====xxxxx=====

A few days later Harry was sitting in his home office. He had been certified like he thought and was accepted to a local magical hospital. He would be working rounds and helping people. Curing illness and fixing injuries. His thoughts though still drifted back to the one whose illness couldn't be cured on this side of the veil.

He looked through the post to find a thick parchment envelope. Even though the wizarding world of the U.K. had begun to move forward and reached the 1950s at least in social and technological levels they still clung to a lot of traditions.

Harry slit the envelope open and froze when he saw the messy hand writing. Recognizing it as Ron's he sat still and read very carefully what he saw.

Dear Harry,

By the time you get this I should be dead. I'm so tired of being here alone. It's all my own damn fault too. I drove everyone away with my stupid ego and refusal to pull myself up by my boots. I coasted through life and finally ran out of speed. Don't feel sorry for me I don't. I still have too many scars from the war, from growing up under the constant threat of death. I don't know how you carry the weight of all of that. You had it ten times worse than I did. Yet I was stupid and jealous of all the attention you got. And when you and Hermione left for Australia I felt like, I felt like you took everything from me. Only you didn't. I walked away from it. Hermione cared about me. You would have stood beside us and been with Ginny if I hadn't been a fool. Then I got back with Lavender and then I screwed that up. I know I'm rambling and probably not making sense. But I've been drinking trying to build up enough courage to take the drugs I bought from some muggle. It just hurts to keep going. It hurts to wake up each day and look in the mirror. Look at the scars on my arms. Look at George still turning to his right to talk to Fred. Look at dad fading away. To wake up from a nightmare that Percy had killed Ginny, or Hermione or both of them. I crawled in a bottle and the nightmares didn't stop Harry. I've been a fool. A stupid fool that pushed people away then got angry when they stopped coming back. I guess I'm trying to say I'm sorry. I'm sorry and I only see one way to make it right. I have too many regrets. Too much pain to go on. Promise me you'll love Hermione and take care of her forever. For me. You and her were the best things to ever happen in my life. Promise too that you won't tell anyone how I really died. Just let them think whatever. Just let them think I screwed up one last time. It would be better than telling them the truth. They would feel guilty and blame themselves like you're doing. I know you Harry. I still miss you my brother. My friend. Don't cry for me, don't feel guilty. It wasn't your fault. There was just too much I did that I couldn't forget, couldn't undo. It was all me Harry. Live. Love her. Love your kids. Be happy. I'm free finally of the pain, the guilt and the memories.

Love your Brother,

Ron.

A picture of the three of them taken by Colin fell out. It was from the year before it all went to hell. Before the war started and they were still innocent and happy. Sitting on the couch, Hermione in the middle with Harry and Ron on either side of her. A book in her lap as always. Ron looking into the camera with a smirk but playing with Hermione's hair. Harry leaning back with his feet on the table in front of them his hand across the back of the couch.

Harry remembered that day. A few hours later he and Dumbledore had gone to get the locket and the battle of the Astronomy Tower as they called it occurred. A year later he was on the run trying not to die. Ron had left them but he came back. Ron had always come back and Harry took it for granted. Ron may not have wanted him to feel guilty but he would no matter what.

He took the letter and burned it. He would respect Ron's wishes and not tell anyone. It wouldn't serve any good purpose. It would just make Molly feel worse. Make the ones left behind feel more pain. He would keep his brother's secret to the grave. It might be too late to save Ron any more pain but he would prevent Arthur, Molly, Ginny and his son Artie from feeling any more pain.

"Hey what's burning?" Hermione came in as quickly as a pregnant woman can move.

"Hunh? Oh sorry just getting rid of some old paperwork I didn't need anymore. You know how it is."

"She raised her eyebrow skeptically, "You really need to get better at the banishing charm Harry."

"Yeah I know, if only I had a brilliant witch to teach me." He said pulling her into his lap.

She nuzzled him briefly before she saw the picture on the floor where it had fallen. Wandlessly pulling it to her she looked at it with a smile. "I remember this day. Professor Dumbledore died that night."

"Yeah he did."

"Too bad about Colin." She sighed.

"I know. Too bad about Ron."

"Too bad about so much Harry. Too bad."