The piece of paper crinkled in her hands as she held it under the kitchen table in her lap. She was so nervous, it was growing wrinkled and illegible with creases, but she couldn't stop herself from fidgeting. Her heart felt like it was about to beat out of her chest and her breathing was short and shallow.
She stared into the brown eyes in front of her, entirely unsuspecting of why she was sitting in front of him, or why she probably looked like a deer caught in the headlights of a car. Luckily, her mother had noticed her paler than normal complexion and had opted to make tea in a false belief it would offer some comfort, but Pan doubted the extra three or four minutes she had to stall would enlighten her to some way of sharing this news in an easier way. She had her own career, her own apartment, and was by all accounts, a self-sufficient adult, but for some strange reason, she felt like she was a child – as though she was about to be grounded.
Despite the tension in her shoulders, she suddenly yawned deeply, unable to shake the weariness that had been in her body since she'd accidentally overworked herself the week before, having no idea what was secretly going on inside of her. Maybe the lightly-caffeinated, warm drink would be a good idea, although as her father continued to study her face with a questioning twist to his expression, she wished her mother would hurry up so she could come out with it. She'd been keeping the news to herself for longer than she wanted to. Even though she was originally glad to have had the time to process it herself, she wasn't sure it had done any good. She was still dreading this conversation as much as she had been days ago.
Her good friend Taani had been the first person she'd run to, mostly because she didn't want to visit the Capsule Corp medical facilities. They all shared the same small team of doctors that knew of their slightly different physiologies, and although Pan knew they were probably bound by laws and policies that prevented them from sharing information, there was a small part of her that just couldn't be sure. She also didn't want to go straight to her mother, not when it was still in question. The last thing she wanted was to create more gray hairs on the woman's head unless there was actually something to be worried about.
Taani had been the right choice. Pan "lightly" crashed her car into their yard, digging up part of their lawn with the edge of the bumper as she nearly dragged herself to their front door. As soon as she'd collapsed in their doorway after trying to take off her boots, she was carried onto their couch for a moment of recovery while Taani drilled her for all of the difficult to share information then picked her jaw off the floor. A couple of hours later, Pan had a long, hot shower, some food, a short nap, a borrowed set of clean clothes – and about 15 store-bought, positive tests initially confirming her worst fear.
Although her and her new husband Yari didn't have kids, they'd gone through a few questionable moments themselves. Taani knew exactly what to do, and Yari, being the epitome of a gentle giant with his large physique and broad shoulders, said just the right words that helped keep her grounded.
The best thing her friend had done for her was written on a small piece of paper handed to her right before the jumped in Taani's car so she could give her a safer ride back to her apartment. She'd called around and managed to find Pan a doctor who was available later the next week for a last-minute appointment. Apparently, someone in their office owed Taani a favor, so she cashed it in for Pan. Pan didn't question it, but promised Taani she'd pay her back somehow.
Thanks to her friend, she held photographic proof of her inevitable future in her hand. Although she hadn't been able to decipher the image at first, the features were now unmistakable. It was time to stop pretending this wasn't happening.
She yawned again as though the little spark had decided to pull more energy from her right at that moment. She groaned and ran a hand through her black hair. The question was no longer in slightest doubt, but if someone would've told her at that moment that it was all just a cruel joke, she'd happily accept the idea. She knew kids would be in her future someday, but today? And in this scenario? Capsule had a lot of explaining to do about their so-called "Saiyan-proof" shot.
"Are you okay?" Gohan finally asked in concern, unable to sit any longer in the mysterious silence. He'd wanted to let her steer this apparently very important discussion in her own time, but his fatherly intuition was ringing its alarms, and besides her sleepy appearance, he could tell there was something very off about his daughter.
She nodded and opened her mouth, but before she could speak, Videl came in with her tea. Pan put the paper in her lap momentarily, wrapping her hands around the warm cup and letting the heat from it sooth her.
"Alright – so start. What's this important thing you need to talk to us about?" Videl asked. "And why do you look like death warmed over?" Her eyes held an odd expression and it didn't take much for Pan to figure out why.
She thinks she knows what this is about, Pan thought. Oh, Momma – you have no idea what's coming.
"I'm - tired," Pan said with a sarcastic chuckle. She rubbed her eyes, already feeling the deep desire for a nap. Maybe the tension and the fear she'd been feeling since she'd arrived at her old home had been making the drain noticeable again – or maybe it was the mile walk she'd taken to their house to disguise the fact that she'd taken a taxi most of the way there due to her unreliable energy.
Gohan's already raised eyebrow went up even further. This obviously wasn't the whole story.
"There's – something going on with me – with my energy." Both of her parents' faces immediately changed in alarm. Before they could ask her anything, she swallowed her nerves and continued. "I overtrained last week. I'd been feeling a weird drain of power for a while, but I ignored it that night in favor of pushing myself more than I should have. The more I powered up, the worse it became until my energy completely spilled out from me and I blacked out."
Gohan pushed up his glasses. He sensed there was more to the story still, but he needed some context. "Blacked out? For a second or two, or…?"
Pan knew why he'd picked up on that detail. It wasn't a good idea to work until you blacked out, but it happened. He'd experienced it a number of times, actually. Piccolo hadn't often let his young pupil stop until he saw that definitive blank look in his eyes. But being knocked unconscious for a few seconds, or even minutes, was a vastly different story than waking up the next day.
"Hours," she answered. "I woke up in the morning. I couldn't fly, I couldn't get warm, I was stuck… And even today, I can't seem to wake up all the way."
"Hours?!" He suddenly focused on her, and she knew exactly what he was doing. He was studying the energy he could sense. She'd gotten in the habit of quashing it most of the time, but when he really reached out to read it, he could see the unevenness about her ki that either accompanied or caused her fatigue. The chair he was sitting in squealed against the floor as he quickly stood up. He looked as though he was about to grab her and take her to the hospital himself. Something told him she had an explanation, so he kept his over-protective reaction in check. "You need to see a doctor. Overdoing it a little doesn't just cause…"
"Please sit down," she pleaded. "I've already been. I didn't have it confirmed until yesterday, but - I already know what's wrong."
Gohan slowly obliged, his concern growing rapidly. Videl's brow set oddly, making her daughter wonder if she'd figured it out after all. Pan took a deep breath. She'd been beating around the bush for a few reasons, not the least of which was to procrastinate long enough to build up the fortitude to announce the crux of the issue. She debated on just handing them the piece of paper, but the idea of saying it seemed like it had some wisdom to it. Maybe it would make it real; maybe it would sink in that this was happening.
"I'm pregnant," she finally said, taking a deep, shaky breath afterwards. "My guess is that powering up in any real way causes my energy to drain exponentially faster than normal. If I'm just living a normal day, it's no worse than being tired, but if I try to fly or do anything that requires ki, it gets - siphoned off quickly."
Neither of them said a word during her explanation. It seemed like an eternity before either of them so much as blinked. There was a silence in the air that was so heavy, she swore she could feel it pressing on her shoulders. She finally brought the paper up from under the table, scooting it over so they could see it for their own eyes on the off chance they didn't immediately believe her.
"They couldn't get the needle in for a blood test; I guess I was too nervous and kept tensing up when they tried. But they did an ultrasound anyway and…"
Videl put her hand over her mouth as the visual evidence became as clear as day. There was no mistaking it for what it was: a new, tiny Saiyan, complete with a tail floating near its curled up, resting body. "A boy," she said quietly, noting its other visible appendage.
"How – how far along are you?" Gohan suddenly asked. His eyes were glued to the picture, but knitting in concern as he realized just how visible certain features already were on the small form. This wasn't a first-trimester image.
She swallowed. The "realness" was finally hitting her, and it was unforgivingly hard. "Around four months," she answered. "Maybe – a little longer."
"Four…?! How did you not know until now?" Videl asked in surprise. Saiyan pregnancies were not easy. She'd known very quickly that something felt strange during both of her pregnancies. But then again, this was the first Earth-born Saiyan who'd gotten pregnant, to their knowledge. This was different, and was going to be new to all of them.
Pan shrugged. "I've been abnormally sleepy for the last few weeks; that's the only sign I've had until I woke up after training."
Videl cleared her throat. "Your appetite's been off too," she noted. "Pan, you – really haven't noticed anything else? A bump? Anything?"
Pink lined her cheeks in embarrassment at having missed some clues that were now obvious. She was supposed to be in tune with her body's own energy. Missing something this big for as long as she had just proved how unfocused and sloppy she'd been about her own training and goals, which she'd once held in priority to almost everything else.
"I train so hard, I rarely have a cycle, and - I thought I was just bloated," she said. "It's not much, but the doctor said that's not abnormal for someone with my build. She wants me to try and gain weight, but I don't think she realizes how hard that is for us..."
"Didn't you go see one of the Capsule doctors?" Videl asked. That group had been the ones to deliver everyone younger than Goten, and they were some of the few who knew about the metabolisms of Saiyans and the way their bodies worked. Pan gave her a sharp look and Videl quickly realized why. She could understand the hesitation for this first appointment, but they'd have to speak more about it later.
"I couldn't get in soon enough," she lied, "so I saw someone else. Other than a lot of speculation surrounding the tail, it went fine."
Gohan seemed to buy the excuse, so Videl dropped that issue for the time being. "Can I see?" she asked, quickly changing the subject.
Pan hesitantly stood and lifted the sweater she was wearing past her belly. Sure enough, there was a subtle hill protruding from her once flat navel. Gohan stared at her stomach in deep concentration, taking on the same expression she'd seen on his face earlier when he was studying her energy. She knew what he was doing, but she wished he wasn't so obvious about his efforts. A moment later, his face softened. It might've been difficult for most people to sense it from that distance, but Gohan had always been a little extra sensitive. He was able to feel it too, now that he knew it was there. Pan could only hope that her spark didn't feel as familiar to him as it did to her.
Gohan sighed softly, taking off his glasses so he could rub his forehead unencumbered. "Over four months, that puts you at seventeen – eighteen weeks?"
"Yeah, around that," she concurred quietly.
"That doesn't give you a lot of time. What are you going to do?"
She pulled her sweater down and leaned against the back of her chair, staring at her hands as she refused to meet his eyes. She was ashamed of this next part, but she didn't know what other options she had. "I know that over-doing it last week is part of what left me so drained the morning after," she started, trying her best to hold down the familiar lump in her throat, "but I can't depend on being able to fly, and I never learned how to drive. And even though I'm planning on taking it easier for the rest of the time, I'm a little worried about being alone the next time I lose too much power. So…"
"You need to move back home," Videl said, finishing her statement for her. She didn't seem entirely disappointed by the idea, but Gohan wasn't as immediately agreeable.
Disappointment filled Pan's eyes. The idea of having to rely on her parents made her feel embarrassed. In a normal situation, she'd probably be happy to accept their assistance, but this was anything but normal. Pan winced hard, realizing she'd probably have to tell her father exactly why she was lacking one key element of support. She hadn't wanted to reveal it all – to anyone, ever again, but now that she was literally going to give birth to a daily reminder of that particular bad choice, she knew that running from it wasn't an option.
"Where's the father?" he asked as though he'd read her thoughts.
She sat back down, tapping her heel against the flooring nervously. Her breath became shallower and she felt dizzy.
Probably at a cake tasting or something, she answered mentally.
Videl looked at her expectantly, and she knew the best thing to do would be to come clean. But the moment Gohan knew, Trunks would know. It was unavoidable. At most, she could probably convince her father to give a short headway to tell Trunks herself, but it wouldn't be much. She just got over one hurdle; she wasn't ready for that one.
"I just found out myself; he doesn't know yet."
Gohan nodded, seemingly understanding that incomplete answer. "He's going to be around though – right?"
Videl silently encouraged Pan as best she could, but the more Pan thought about it, the angrier the idea made her. If Trunks had really wanted to try and salvage any piece of their relationship, he could've checked in on her, seen how she was doing with being so suddenly abandoned after losing the secret competition she'd apparently been in. There was no follow-up phone call, no message, or letter saying "hope you don't hate me forever," or any other minimal effort he could've made to at least show he still cared. He'd told her he'd wanted to end it before people were hurt, but – every day he went radio silent just made the wound deeper.
She'd been the bigger person after the gravity room floor, forcing them to face their new dynamic in the most uncomfortable way she could in an attempt to save their life-long friendship. He hadn't even tried to return the favor. It was like he wanted to pretend those three months never happened at all.
Trunks seemed content to move on without a second thought about her. So, why should she interrupt his blissful life with this devastating news? And why should she have to put herself through the hardship of forcing a reunion yet again just so she could be forever tied to him in this way?
This boy would have plenty of fatherly influence in his life. He didn't need Trunks.
"I don't know if I want him involved," she said.
"Pan," Videl said scoldingly.
Gohan was surprised at his wife's abrupt tone, but he didn't want to immediately jump into the middle of that topic until he heard more of what Pan had to say.
Pan snapped her eyes up at her, pleading with her not to take this discussion any further. Videl's stubborn and steadfast expression mirrored Pan's, indicating she wasn't going to back down from her side of their silent argument, but the younger woman always lost contests of will with her mother.
"Look, we didn't work," she said defensively, "and before he – before we decided to end it, he made it very clear to me that I wasn't the one he wanted." She swallowed hard again, feeling the emotion welling up once more and cursing herself for allowing it to hit her yet again. "I'm not going to lock myself into a sharing a lifetime with someone who didn't give enough of a shit about me to…" her words died on her lips. It was very clear she didn't want to say more on the issue.
Gohan put his glasses back on his face, again taking on his sympathetic, gentle fatherly appearance that he normally did before he said something corrective. She hadn't seen that specific expression since he'd told her she needed to rewrite a large part of her thesis because it wasn't good enough.
"You can't just keep something like that from someone," he said calmly, hoping he wouldn't have to explain more about the moral implications of what she'd just argued.
Rationally speaking, Gohan was correct, but every time she thought about telling Trunks, she also thought of his face up on that butte that day – apologizing to her as though he'd created some mild inconvenience in her life, throwing her away for the sake of someone who had broken his heart. He was going to have the family he wanted. She didn't want her son feeling like he was in a competition for his father.
She closed her eyes and shook her head, willing those thoughts away for the moment before they inspired more emotion. This conversation had already been humiliating enough. "If you don't want me to move back home, I understand," Pan started carefully. "I can figure out getting to work and to the doctor myself."
"Pan, we don't…" Videl started, before she was interrupted.
"But you don't get a say in what I do or don't do with the father," she said firmly. "That's my choice – and honestly, we might all live better lives without him."
Videl looked angry, but she was holding her tongue for the time being. Pan couldn't tell if it was due to her wanting to argue more, or if it was because she'd interrupted her. Her relationship with her parents had always been very strong, but if anything was going to tax it, it was something as big as this. She was asking for their help, but she wasn't asking to be parented. It was a balance they'd all have to figure out, or she was going to be more alone than she thought.
Gohan and Videl shared a silent look at each other and Pan felt the world tipping on its axis again. Even though it has been a week since her major collapse, the day had brought an emotional stress that seemed to suck the energy right back out of her.
Spark better turn out to be strong if he's eating this much ki, she thought wryly.
"You both can talk about this and decide if it's okay, but I need a nap," she said, interrupting whatever thought process her parents were going through. She didn't wait for a response, instead walking up the stairs to her old room before the gray checkerboard boxes could return to the outside of her vision. She knew she wasn't going to make it back to her own apartment under her own power anyway, even with the help of another taxi.
Videl and Gohan watched her ascend the stairs and slowly walk into her bedroom. As soon as her door closed, Videl crossed her arms and turned towards her husband. "I'm not going to tell her she has to do this alone," she said in a whisper. "This kid is already exhausting her and she still has half way to go."
"I wasn't going to say anything without asking you first," Gohan replied. "I'll do what I can, but we both know most of the burden's going to be on you if she's living here."
She nodded. "I know, but she needs help, and – she doesn't admit needing it often. She's obviously confused and shocked herself. I had you helping me, but I still can't imagine having gone through what I did with Pan without your mother there."
Gohan nodded, then after a moment, smiled softly, "I thought she'd gotten on your nerves."
"Oh, she did," Videl said with a chuckle, "but I still couldn't have done it without her. Having your first baby is hard enough, but a Saiyan baby… The only reason I survived some days was because of what your mother knew to do and prepare for."
Gohan slouched in his chair and pulled the picture back up to look more closely. He sighed heavily, feeling very mixed emotions about what had transpired. "This is – not how I was expecting becoming a grandfather would be," he said sardonically. "I've looked forward to it, but in the distant future, and with a good, stable partner in the picture. Not – this."
Videl twisted her lips and looked away, tapping her fingers on the table. "Gohan, can I talk to her privately?"
He looked surprised at the suggestion, but nodded. "I've got some reading to do. I can stay down here while you…"
"I mean actual privacy," she said, making an inference to the fact that he would likely be able to overhear everything from anywhere in their home if he wanted to.
"I guess I can go meet Goku at school – fill him in on the news. He'll probably be excited, at least."
"Thank you," she said softly.
Gohan stood up to leave, realizing she wanted that privacy sooner rather than later. "Videl," he said, "do you know something I don't?"
Her eyes immediately dropped to the floor and he had his answer.
"I know you and I don't keep secrets, but if I say something now, I lose her trust, and she needs someone to lean on right now," she said. "It'll probably come out soon anyway. I doubt she'll be able to keep this quiet for as long as she thinks she will."
He pushed his glasses further up his nose and put his hands on his hips. "I understand, but…"
"It's not the professor," she said.
He exhaled audibly in relief and she couldn't help but smile. She didn't think he'd be as comforted by that statement if he knew the truth, but she couldn't know for sure. Only time would tell how that worked out, but for now, Pan seemed content for her father to remain in the dark.
Videl waited for Gohan to leave and then made her way slowly up the stairs. Just like the week before, Pan was lying on her small, old bed, facing the window that she would often sneak out of as a kid. She was dead tired and it was written all over her face. She'd never been sick a day in her life; Videl had never seen her looking as exhausted as she was, but she was still somehow awake.
"Mom, I can't…"
"Your father's not in the house. I sent him to pick up your brother and told him to take his time."
Pan nodded, closing her eyes. "If you're here for a lecture, I haven't changed my mind. I don't want to tell Trunks."
Videl sighed, sat down on the bed next to her and rubbed her shoulder. "Doing the right thing isn't necessarily about what you want," she said gently. Pan's tone in that statement had been a childish one, but it was her words that disappointed her the most. She hoped it was just because the news was so new that Pan hadn't had the chance to process through it yet. She couldn't believe her daughter would be bitter enough to let her own hurt feelings get in the way of such an important relationship. "I know whatever Trunks did cut you deeply, but you can't keep this from him forever, and you can't keep a child from knowing his father."
Pan grimaced and wrapped her arms around her waist. Along with decreased energy, she'd been continuously cold since that morning in the field, almost as though the deep chill had haunted her from that day. It didn't help that the weather had changed very suddenly at winter's approach, but she never realized how much she relied on her ki to regulate her body temperature. Videl pulled the folded blanket from the foot of her bed and covered her with it. She didn't object.
"I'm not saying 'forever,'" she explained, "but my due date is like a week out from his wedding. This isn't exactly the time…"
"Then rip off the band-aid and tell him now. He can reschedule for after your delivery date. It's a short engagement anyway; taking a little more time wouldn't kill him."
Pan frowned, pulling the blanket up around her neck and the bottom of her face as though she was hiding how angry her mother's suggestion had made her. Videl knew what was going through her head already.
"You can't just sit on this until after he's born," Videl said firmly.
"Why not?" she asked as though her mother had handed her the idea. "It would be easier for everyone. Trunks can marry the love of his life, Bulma can throw the party of the century, and no one would be distracted by his mistake."
"Pan…"
Even though she was hiding her mouth, Videl could see Pan's forehead wrinkle, revealing the frown that was tucked under the edge of her blanket had deepened even further. She felt like she was talking to a wall, but she also understood how deeply Pan's pride had been hurt, and how much that pride meant to her. She could only hope time would give way to clarity and enough maturity to make the right decision.
"Okay, it's not ideal timing," Videl conceded, giving into the urge to "mother" her on the topic just one more time as she added, "but if this kid comes out with a purple head of hair, you should be prepared to do a lot of explaining very quickly."
"I'll cross that bridge when I get to it," she answered.
Videl bit her lip as she debated on whether to say anything further. "To be fair, I think you're selling him a little short," she said cautiously. Pan opened her eyes, glaring with an argument already on her tongue, but Videl continued quickly before she could interrupt. "I'm not saying he handled the situation with you correctly, but if you give him a chance, he'll be here for him," she argued, putting a light hand on her belly.
Pan's expression softened noticeably. "Will he?" she asked quietly, echoing her earlier thoughts as she looked down at her stomach. "If he has a legitimate family, is my kid going to end up feeling like I did that day? I don't want him going through that. I don't want him to feel like a second choice."
Videl was struck silent for a moment as empathetic pain flooded her heart just like it had the first time she'd seen her daughter after that day three months ago. She'd known this thing with Trunks wasn't going to work from the beginning, but she never imagined he'd break her heart as thoroughly as he had. Maybe she didn't know him as well as she thought she did.
"At least give him a chance to help out financially," Videl said, shifting the conversation towards a pragmatic side. "I know the dojo is doing great, but raising a Saiyan child is expensive. Food for both of you, school…"
Pan reached over to her nightstand, pulling out a small box from the top drawer. Inside, was a card she'd naively kept from a time that felt both like it could've been yesterday and decades ago. Within was a check she hadn't deposited yet, which she handed over to her mother. Videl looked on it with wide eyes, ignoring the sound and smell of the greeting card that contained it sizzling away in a ball of flame.
"Okay, well – he already has that covered, I guess," Videl said. "Pan, think about what I said. You don't have to do anything today or tomorrow, but think about it. I know it's got to be hard to imagine, but maybe he's a better co-parent than you think he'd…"
Pan's leg jumped; it was an involuntary spasm that signaled she had fallen asleep before Videl could finish her argument. A soft snore escaped her parted lips soon afterward. Videl sighed, knowing she would be out all night, at least. Part of her hoped even longer, given how exhausted she seemed. It was going to be a rough few months for all of them, but for now, she left her daughter alone in her quiet room to sleep. She wondered if Pan knew what she was really in for, but that was a conversation for another day.
Heat surrounded her, flooding her senses and covering every inch of her body with pleasant flames as his hand moved lightly over her skin. He looked down at her, his cocky smile complimenting his sharp, masculine features and bringing her to a loss for words as her breath quickened. His icy eyes met hers for a moment before he continued, promising her the world within their depths and bringing with it a feeling of security within his arms she'd never felt before while simultaneously so exposed.
Without additional hesitation, his lips covered hers, moving down her neck and over her breasts before pausing at her flat stomach. All she could see was his hair, brushing lightly over her navel as he travelled further down, but she could feel everything he was doing to her, making quick and light work of her pleasure until her body spasmed in satisfaction with his attentions.
Her brown eyes snapped open, the ceiling of her room coming into focus as a colder reality slowly set back in. A dream… She swore she could still smell him as though he'd been there, still felt his skin against hers, still felt his energy surrounding her body like a warm blanket as they connected, but it was just the illusion of a stressed and hormonal mind. She'd had plenty of them since he'd been gone, but never as many as her last trimester seemed to trigger – and they'd never been so realistic before.
A drop of water escaped the confines of her eye before she could stop it, yet another reason for her to be glad she'd napped in her room instead of on the couch in the middle of her family's living room. She couldn't imagine the intense memory hadn't brought with it potentially embarrassing noises, and now her emotions were getting the best of her as well. She brought her hands up in front of her face as though she was trying to reestablish herself in the real world, trying to desperately shake her mind and body from the pleasant things that it had been vividly concocting for her just moments before.
Tonight's going to be hard enough, she scolded herself, keep it together.
With a huff, she sat up. It was much more difficult to do than it should've been, but her stomach was anything but flat now that she was nearly at the end of her pregnancy. A large bump full of baby and – other stuff now took the place of visible abs, and even though she'd stayed lightly active, her core muscles felt weak and loose. Her mother and father had tried telling her about possible pleasantries like "diastasis recti" and "episiotomies", but she'd done her best to ignore them. She'd heard of women who loved to be pregnant, who talked to everyone about everything, and read every book there was on the subject. She was not one of these women. She just wanted to get the event over with, and would ecstatically welcome the little guy early if he decided he didn't want to wait two more weeks after all.
She waddled down the stairs, her back screaming at her for submitting it to the posture change that came with a shifted center of gravity. Part of her just wanted to go to bed and sleep through the night into the morning, but her hunger beckoned her to the kitchen; plus, if going to sleep meant more of those hormonal-driven dreams of him, then maybe it was better to stay awake as long as she could.
Videl was standing at the bottom of the stairs. A beautiful dress that matched her eyes and showed off her toned arms flowed down her figure and pooled slightly on the floor behind her. Some women her age wouldn't have had the courage to wear it, but Videl was feeling particularly ornery that night. She wasn't exactly looking forward to the evening either.
"You look pretty, Mom," Pan said, honestly admiring her mother's reflection.
Videl turned and gave her a sad smile. Pan wasn't in the mood to hear what she knew was coming, but at least she was prepared for it. "We don't have to go. I can tell them you don't feel well. Everyone would understand. Or your father can go alone…"
Pan shook her head. "We've been over this. It's fine." She tried tucking a stray hair on her head behind her ear, but it was just too short. Her hair was at an awkward length, but she was usually too concerned with other things these days to worry about her looks. Her mother's stunning appearance actually made her feel self-conscious in a way. She couldn't wait to have her stomach back.
Videl lightly squeezed her arm in support. "If it makes you feel better, I can't wait until this damn thing is over. All I want is one dance with your father and then I'm done."
Pan smiled softly. "You haven't had a night out like this in a while and it's been because you're taking care of me. Enjoy it," she said honestly. "Stay out late. Just keep an eye on your phone – in case..."
"How's Spark doing today?" Gohan asked, coming down the stairs in a sharp, black suit. Pan noted the smile on her mother's face, genuinely hoping they would make a night out of it, even if she was stuck at home carrying the groom's baby and pretending to help her brother with his advanced homework.
"I think I'm going to sit down and think of names tonight," she said. She loved that her family had adopted her nickname for the baby, but "Son Spark" wasn't going to go down well on the playground. "But he's doing good. Just hungry."
Gohan nodded, patting his pocket subconsciously to make sure his emergency line was already on him and ready to go. "Remember, I can be here in three minutes if you need me," he said. "And the plan is that your mom will meet us there, so you just need to remember your bag…"
"I'll be fine. He's not making a sound, Dad."
He nodded again and took a deep breath as though he was nervous about leaving her. When he turned and saw his wife, some of those fears melted away. "You look amazing," he said, a boyish grin spreading across his features that made him look like he was 18 again.
Videl's smile matched his. "Good enough?"
"'Good enough?' You're going to outshine the bride!" he said.
Pan swore she saw her mother blush. Gohan lifted her coat from the rack and put it around her arms, signaling he was ready. Videl looked towards Pan with the same question she'd asked earlier written on her face.
"Go," Pan said again.
Videl conceded and followed her husband out to their car. She watched the house disappear on the horizon, concerned for her daughter and her fast-approaching grandson.
"Did we get him a gift?" Gohan suddenly asked, realizing they weren't bringing anything with them.
"It's taken care of," she answered. His gift is my continued silence through this event, if he's lucky.
. . .
In a surprising change of character, the wedding venue was not the Capsule Corp building. It was an ostentatious manor owned by some fashion mogul that Bulma had paid an arm and a leg to rent. It was a beautiful home, with a grand banister, a large enough ballroom for a flood of Briefs guests and a kitchen equipped well enough to handle appetizers, three courses, dessert, and an open bar for 400 humans and four Saiyans (five if Bulma could talk a certain prince into making an appearance at the crowded gala for his son's sake). There was no argument to be made about how gorgeous the place looked. It was straight out of a movie set. Regardless of how rich they were, the fact that they'd thrown this together in a few short months was nothing short of a miracle.
By the time the Sons had driven up to the entrance and encapsulated their car, they were running late, so they were ushered quickly and quietly into the ceremony room where things were just starting to get underway. They were nearly in the back row, and Videl wondered for a moment if their presence would even be acknowledged in this huge crowd, and if she should've just stayed home and spared herself the vicarious pain of it.
The bride was stunning in her sleeved, white gown that contrasted the cape of her black hair. But Videl felt a twinge of something unidentifiable when she realized how similar some of her features were to her daughter's. Her eyes were different, her hair longer, but their similar petite forms and coloring didn't go unnoticed. Was that just Trunks operating based on a "type" he had and was his attraction to Pan solely based on a subtle, coincidental resemblance? If that was the case, had he just using her to supplement the absence of the woman he really wanted? Pan had asserted the idea many times. Videl had originally dismissed it in favor of granting the boy she knew more credit than that, but – maybe Pan had a point.
Videl had been pushing Pan to tell Trunks the truth during the entire length of the last half of her pregnancy. But now, she was starting to understand some of what Pan had said to her about him, and her reason for her distrust of him in regards to the pregnancy was suddenly becoming apparent. Her mind seemed to abruptly change just watching this quick ceremony take place, and Videl wondered if she hadn't given enough credence to Pan's decision to temporarily hide Spark's paternity until this event was over.
The worst part of it was the look Trunks had in his eyes during the entire ceremony. The stupid smile on his blushing face, the unabashed goofiness he exuded when he saw her walking down the aisle - he was absolutely head-over-heels in love with his bride. There would've been no doubt in anyone's mind. That observation sent a wave of unpleasant, mixed emotions through her body. She was heartbroken for her daughter, but Videl had been right all along. It never would've worked. This was a competition Pan never could've won.
Once again, she found herself wishing it had never happened in the first place, but as Pan's own big day approached and her grandson moved closer and closer to his birthday, those thoughts also carried their own sense of guilt. She was looking forward to meeting Spark, but just wished his existence hadn't required her daughter getting stabbed through the heart. The whole situation was a big, stinking mess. Videl seemed to be the only person who knew about all of it, but there wasn't anything she could do. It was what it was until Pan changed her mind.
"Are you okay?" Gohan asked in whispered astonishment.
Videl took a breath and unclenched her jaw. Undoubtedly, he was feeling some of her livid energy, which was likely helped by the fact that she was clenching his hand so tightly, she was leaving half-moon marks on his skin, quite a feat since he'd been building back his strength. She nodded and apologized quietly, being careful to keep her feelings under wraps for the rest of the ceremony.
After the ceremony, and after all the toasts had been made, the food had been served, and the cake had been cut, the dance floor was finally open. Videl wanted nothing more than to dance with her husband once and then to leave. She'd counted it a blessing that none of the Briefs had been by their distant table all night, but they had been seated next to some old friends of her husband's and the conversation had been serious enough to stall her plan for an early exit.
Eighteen and her daughter had been seated at their table, but their party was missing the shortest, but most obvious member. Krillin had grown ill suddenly, and was not doing well. Gohan's sense of time had been distorted by his own perpetual youth, his wife's genetic luck, and Bulma's use of the dragonballs to cheat time. He'd forgotten how much his father's old friends would've aged, and his own life and work had gotten in the way of remembering to visit.
He'd been asking them lots of questions, reminiscing, and making a promise to visit soon once the baby was born. Eighteen, who was normally a very private person, seemed actually relieved and pleased with the conversation she'd been having with Gohan. Videl only knew her from dealings with her father over tournament money during the years they'd staged her as the runner up instead of the winner. She hadn't exactly been pleasant then, so it was nice for Videl to see her with an occasional genuine smile on her face. Then of course, there was also Marron – who she'd seen at Goten's party. She'd grown up as a perfect balance between her parents: quiet and lovely like Eighteen, but friendly and warm like Krillin. Videl was glad they'd been seated with them, but wasn't disappointed when they'd made the decision to leave, since they were the only reason Gohan had wanted to stay as late as they had.
One dance, and then we're gone, she reminded herself.
The moment Gohan finished saying his goodbyes to the two women, she grabbed his arm and pulled him towards the dance floor. They were nearly half way there when they were suddenly blocked, and Videl looked up to see the blue eyes of the one person she was really hoping to avoid that night.
Well, it is his party. I guess that was too much to hope for, she thought.
"Hi Sis," he said warmly.
Normally, Videl smiled at that charming, pet greeting of his. Tonight wasn't the night for it.
He doesn't know, she reminded herself, and she swallowed the angry words that had first come to mind. He didn't miss the fact that her expression had darkened, however. For a moment, he'd grown slightly nervous, but Gohan's smiling face and warm hand on his shoulder helped negate some of the concern that had grown in the back of his mind.
Gohan offered his friendly congratulations and compliments about the venue, but Trunks' eyes stayed focused on Videl, wondering if she was angry at him, and if so, whether it was due to Pan. If she was, this would definitely be the night to have hard feelings, but so far, she hadn't said anything. It would be strange for her to hold anything against him at this point anyway, so long after they'd broken up. That was all based on the idea she even knew about him and Pan in the first place. He didn't think she'd told anyone.
"I'm sorry, what?" he asked Gohan, realizing he'd said something he missed.
"I said this looks like you spared no expense," the older man said with a laugh, pointing around the ceiling.
Trunks rubbed the back of his neck, looking up at the canopy of purple wisteria lined with gold accents and the large bouquets in the centerpieces which made it difficult for people to talk to each other at the same table. "My mom," he started. "I would've done things a lot differently, but – you know how she is."
The statement had been casual, but the frown on his face revealed some true frustration. Bulma had vetoed all of his plans. This was almost more her wedding than his. She had been subtly following him all night though, and he didn't feel like he could openly express his disdain for her stubbornness without her potentially overhearing.
"Hey," Goten greeted cheerfully, walking up on the group. He'd been at the wedding party table all night, and hadn't seen his brother or sister-in-law yet. "Where's Goku?"
"We left him at home," Gohan said. "We thought we'd use this as an excuse for a date night."
"And we weren't sure if this was going to be the best place for kids," Videl continued.
"Ah – Goku's not your average kid though," Trunks argued, seemingly genuinely missing his presence.
You're not going to even ask about her, are you? Videl wondered silently.
"At least Pan has someone to keep her company," Goten said.
Trunks' face turned mildly red. He wasn't sure if they realized she hadn't been invited, or if they just assumed her invitation got lost in the mail. It wasn't that he didn't want her there. It would've been difficult, but he could've done it. But the more he thought about it, the more he felt like sending her an invitation would be salt in the wound, especially since the engagement had been so short.
"How's she doing?" Goten asked. "Ready to pop?"
Trunks furrowed his brow, thoroughly confused by what Goten had just said.
"Yeah," Gohan answered, "she's ready. I don't think she likes being pregnant."
Despite the darkened room being lit solely by dim, colorful lights, Videl watched in satisfaction as the boy suddenly grew pale and slightly green. It did make her feel better to know that he'd been completely clueless about Pan's current state. She wasn't entirely sure if Goten had shared that news with him or not, but the shock on his face was evidence of the fact that he hadn't even known she was having a baby until that very moment.
"Pan's – pregnant?" he asked, trying hard to avoid appearing as stunned as he was by the news. In truth, he looked like he'd just been sucker punched in the stomach.
"Very," Goten said with a laugh. "She's as big as a hot air balloon."
Videl frowned and slapped her brother-in-law on the arm scoldingly for the remark.
"Didn't I tell you that?" Goten asked Trunks.
"N-no!" he stammered, failing to keep his voice down as far as he would've liked.
Goten put his thumb to his chin. "No, I'm sure I mentioned it," he argued casually. "I guess you were just too busy with wedding stuff…"
"Goten, I would've remembered..!" he trailed off as he rubbed the back of his neck again, shifting uncomfortably from foot to foot. Gohan somehow wasn't picking up on it. Neither was Goten, but that was more understandable. To Videl, his nervous behavior and quickened breath were obvious. Maybe they were assigning his excessive energy to the excitement of the night, but post-wedding bliss didn't usually produce the less-than-subtle, petrified expression Trunks now wore. "I didn't know she was with someone."
Goten laughed and elbowed him in the ribs. "She's not. It's all a mystery."
She knew exactly why Trunks had said what he did – desperate to find any hint of information that may exonerate himself. Unfortunately, he hadn't found the answer he was looking for, and he grew even paler.
"Goten…" It was Gohan's turn to scold him. "I don't think Trunks cares about Pan's business."
Trunks rested his palm on a table behind him for support. Videl smiled internally, noticing the slight glimmer of sweat that had appeared on his forehead. "Is she doing okay?" he asked, still attempting to sound much cooler and relaxed than he was. "I mean – is everything going alright?"
Gohan nodded. "The baby's taking more than his fair share of energy and she's been too exhausted to do much, but it's going alright. She's just eager to be done."
"'His?'" Trunks asked, he was suddenly finding something on the ground very interesting, but he wasn't avoiding the topic, as potentially terrifying as it might've been. Videl noted his typical nervous habit was in full swing; if he rubbed the back of his head any harder, he was going to go bald.
"No name yet." Goten chuckled. "Unless she's thought of one since the last time I saw her?"
"She's working on that tonight," Gohan said with a smile.
Videl's inner satisfaction with Trunks' nervousness softened, as did the scowl she was holding involuntarily on her face.
"I've never seen anything like it," Goten interjected. "Her energy burns out on her at random times, she's weak, she can't even fly, it's like she's…"
"Normal?" Videl asked in a mock-offended tone.
"Exactly!" Goten exclaimed, oblivious to Videl's sarcasm. "She can't even hold a ki ball for more than a few seconds – and she's pissed about it."
Trunks' brows wrinkled, his nervousness suddenly giving way to concern. "She's seeing Dr. Alphet at Capsule, right?" he asked. "Bra says she's the one with the best grasp of Saiyan physiology…."
"She's seeing her own doctor," Videl interrupted.
"Why?" he asked incredulously. For a moment, Videl was about to push back, before she realized he was asking out of genuine care. This wasn't just an attempt to gain information by convincing her to use medical sources he had access to and technically owned. His next emphatic words lent weight to that idea. "Capsule has regeneration tanks, NICU beds, everything she might need. And since the Senzu died out…"
"We've tried to talk her into it," Gohan said, looking at Videl, "but maybe we need to push harder."
She nodded in agreement. Check-up appointments were one thing, but the birth could be a different story and Trunks had made a good point. She'd had it in her mind to argue the switch to Capsule a little more enthusiastically once it got closer to the big day, but she was already out of time.
"Is she home?" Trunks asked, "I could – maybe call her – talk her into…" he was practically tripping over his own tongue trying to get the words out of his mouth.
"Now?" Goten asked, waving his finger around at the room as though he was reminding him of where he was.
Goten's question has been absurd, but for a moment, it looked like Trunks was actually considering it. The empathetic resentment Videl had been feeling earlier had mostly disappeared. He wasn't stupid. He knew the timing was suspicious and Pan's secrecy about the father was not helping the matter; he was putting the pieces together just fine all by himself. Pan might not have to worry about telling him at all at this rate.
She was sure the question would rob him of sleep until he knew the answer, but she had her doubts Pan would tell the truth, even if he plainly asked. The way he'd chosen to leave Pan might not have been fair to her, but what she was doing definitely wasn't fair to him. The mess was just getting messier.
She sighed, knowing both her and Pan would probably regret what she was about to say. "She'll be at the dojo after hours for the next couple of days getting ready for her maternity leave. That might be a good, quiet time for you two to talk – if you want to," she said.
His eyes met Videl's for just a moment, a question surfacing in his mind that he wouldn't dare let himself ask while surrounded by multiple Sons.
"Sure, leave a beachfront honeymoon to talk to a girl about birthing plans. Sounds reasonable to me," Goten said cluelessly, interrupting Trunks' train of thought enough to keep him from completing that part of the puzzle.
Trunks laughed lightly and artificially, trying his best to appear normal. "Right. Well, I'm sure we'll catch up soon." His face had not regained any color, but he excused himself, choosing to go find his new bride for some sort of steady comfort and distraction from the giant question that had just been thrown at him from out of nowhere.
Videl reached for her husband's hand, finally pulling him to the dance floor for their one appointment. As his arms wrapped around her waist, she turned her attention to his face, finding a troubled expression looking back at her.
"What's wrong?" she asked, wondering if he was starting to put things together as well. She'd honestly thought it would've been quicker than this, considering Pan's insistence on secrecy, but a small part of him was still in denial that she was an adult, let alone one capable of making her own mistakes.
He smiled uneasily, bringing her no comfort, but he didn't say anything to allude to his thoughts. "Nothing," he said quietly, pulling her closer and choosing to focus on their one dance together instead of the odd interaction they'd just shared.
The dojo was dark and quiet after the normal operating hours, especially given the shorter days of the early spring months. It felt both peaceful and a little spooky all at once. Normally, the halls were filled with the sounds of kiai and the voices of teachers as they corrected forms and counted off moves. When the large center was empty, the only sounds were from her memories, of her younger self running after her grandfather, his older, scruffy voice delighted to see her, play with her, or simply carry her on his shoulders. It was a bitter-sweet feeling for her, and one that had not faded despite the amount of time she spent there.
Even though she was only going to be gone for a couple of months, she was really going to miss being with her class kids and being reminded of those moments in the old building. She hadn't thought that would've been the case when she'd started teaching. She didn't think she'd like children as much as adult students, and had been looking simply for a job to tide her over until she could find her own career. Now, she found she was having trouble letting go for the relatively short time she would need for the baby. She was already looking forward coming back and her first day off hadn't even officially started yet. This place had truly grown on her.
She smiled, picking up a picture of her and her current students in a chaotic group. The trouble-makers and the teacher's pets could be easily distinguished based on whether they were trying to look polite, badass, or were making goofy expressions at the camera. Based on her time with these kids, any superficial judgement to be made would likely be completely accurate. She wondered where "Spark" would fall. If he was anything like his mother or Videl, he'd be trying to look badass, but if his father's childhood traits took precedence, he'd be making a rude face. Despite her trepidations about becoming a mom, she had to admit: she was excited to find out.
"Are you ready?" a friendly voice asked from behind her.
"Almost," she said, putting the picture she'd been holding in the box so it would remind her of what she had to come back to. "I just want to collect a few more things – and then I think leave a couple more notes for my sub."
"You know – that's mostly going to be me," Arán said. "And you can call me whenever you want."
She smiled. "I know that, but my mom told me to step away as much as I could. The only kid she wants me thinking too hard about for the next several weeks is my own." As if on cue, she grimaced slightly, feeling a heavy and uncomfortable impact on the inside of her belly.
"Doing okay?" he asked, his brown eyes watching her in concern.
She nodded. "He's been kicking a lot lately. I think he's just trying to find the door."
A smile spread across his lips. "Sounds like you're running short on time."
"I hope so!" she said with a chortle.
"Can I…?" he asked hesitantly, reaching his hand out towards her stomach.
She stalled her response, as she wasn't a huge fan of being touched on her stomach. Still, it was nice that he'd asked, which was a lot more than she could say for most. "Uh – sure," she said.
He gently rested his palm on her protruding navel, barely putting enough pressure on her stomach for her to feel. She was relieved when the baby kicked in response, giving him the reaction he was looking for quickly, so that this didn't last longer than necessary. His eyes lit up as he experienced the movement beneath her skin, genuinely surprised that he seemed to be able to feel the distinct shape of foot come up to meet his hand.
She winced again, but his delighted face inspired a smile despite her discomfort. "I'm not going to lie, that's very weird," he said with a laugh, "but also – pretty amazing."
"I feel the same way," she said with a yawn.
"We should probably get you home." He put his hands on his hips, examining the small box of things she'd collected. "If you forget anything, I can always drop it by."
She considered his offer. Her parents' house was not too far from the dojo, even by car, and her mother already knew him pretty well. She was feeling drained. Her power hadn't had as severe a drop as the day she'd found out she was pregnant, but the baby inside was still stealing her ki by the gallon. "Well, that would give me an excuse to get an update about the kids…"
"Or I could just check in on you without needing the excuse," he argued. "Besides, I'm going to have to meet the little one at some point, right? If he's already kicking that hard, he's going to be a star student here in no time."
She lightly blushed. She'd known a while ago that he liked her, but was surprised to see that extremely late pregnancy hadn't apparently diminished his interest. He'd asked her out for the second time once he'd learned through some gossip among the teachers that the baby's father was not in the picture anymore. Part of her had been tempted to take him up on the offer, but she couldn't imagine the idea of going on a first date with anyone so close to delivery. Just the idea of trying to fit into a normal restaurant booth was giving her anxiety. She'd told him the timing was bad, but to ask again after the baby was born.
"I think I'd like that," she answered.
He ran a hand through his dark auburn hair. She could tell he was thinking of something clever to say in return. Before he got the chance, the sound of quiet footsteps interrupted them. "We're not open," he said to the figure that appeared in the doorway.
Pan swallowed hard, kicking herself for not sensing his approach. Her energy was all over the place, but that hadn't made her less able to read the energy of others. Spark's kicking must've distracted her, or her conversation with Arán. It didn't help that he was basically the last person on Earth she'd expected to see – especially that night.
"Sorry – the door was unlocked – and Videl said you'd be here," Trunks explained.
Pan took a deep breath, attempting to steady her nerves and the deep anger she'd felt so many months ago that was suddenly unburying itself from within her heart. Why was he there – now? Where was he months ago, before…?
"Arán," she started, "can you do me a favor and wait in the car? I promise I won't be long."
Arán looked back towards Pan's angry eyes with a dubious look on his face, then again back at Trunks. His shoulders tensed, and for a moment, Pan was wondering if he was going to refuse her request. Reluctantly, he agreed, walking past Trunks slowly as he exited, giving the Saiyan the impression he was trying to stare a hole straight through his head.
"Shouldn't you be on your honeymoon?" she asked, unable to keep the venom from her tone.
He sighed heavily. He thought he was ready for this conversation, but there was really no preparing for it adequately. "I am," he replied softly, choosing to ignore her sarcasm in favor of providing a genuine answer. "I said I was taking care of something at work."
Her face grew hot, and she was grateful for the dark room's ability to hide its red color. She felt her ki climb as her heart raced, but as soon as it did, it fell again, swirling down the endless drain that had claimed her energy so many times before in the last few months. She leaned against the desk at the front of the room for stability, trying to ignore the suddenly excited kicks inside her stomach.
"Are you okay?" he asked in concern. He'd felt the buildup and the drain, and noticed the look of exhaustion suddenly flash over her livid expression.
"What are you doing here?" she asked, ignoring his question. Water gathered in her eyes, blurring her vision, bringing her as much frustration and embarrassment as her sudden energy drain had. She crossed her arms awkwardly in front of her as well as her belly would allow, feeling incredibly self-conscious and unable to hide or fly away from this confrontation.
He took a deep breath and scratched the back of his neck. There was no real easy way to ask this question, but he had to. It had kept him awake, distracted, and incredibly stressed since he'd run into the Sons at his wedding. Fully enjoying his life with his new wife was beyond his ability while this still hung over him. His eyes locked on her stomach. It wasn't as though he ever thought the Sons were lying, but seeing her for himself was surreal. She was obviously good with kids, but imagining her as a mother was difficult for him. Then again, until he'd walked into this very building almost a year ago, he would've said he had trouble picturing her as an adult period.
"I didn't know…" he started, trailing off. "No one told me…" He cleared his throat. Beating around the bush wasn't going to do either of them any favors. "Your parents told me about the baby. Pan – why didn't you tell me?"
She looked at him, spite filling her eyes to the point where he almost took a step back. Why didn't I..?! she shouted mentally, reliving the day on the butte over and over again in a flash. She'd gone over it in her head so many times already. There must've been something she'd missed, something she did or said that would've pushed him in the direction he went, but there was nothing – no clue or indication that things were going wrong. He'd told Pan he was happy with her and didn't need to look backwards anymore. One minute, she was living in blissful ignorance, thinking he might actually be telling truth and they were making baozi and plans for the future together as though nothing in the world was wrong. The next minute, he reneged on everything.
She huffed loudly, trying again to calm her anger before her energy built and drained again on her and she ended up either passing out or going into labor. That was so long ago. And until just a few minutes ago, she'd thought she'd actually been able to handle it, to process it for what it was. She was even thinking about dating again, and the moment she saw one possibility for a happy future without Trunks in her life, he'd literally walked right back in, tearing the healed scar open to reveal fresh flesh.
This is just going to be how it is, isn't it? she asked herself.
It wasn't the first time she'd come to that realization, but it felt more real and concrete with him standing in front of her as opposed to being some abstract idea. They were going to see each other all the time – share custody, and coparent like responsible adults. Because as much wrong as Pan felt he'd done to her, there wasn't a version of reality in existence where Trunks wouldn't take responsibility for his son. And in the meantime, Spark was going to be able to live part time in a giant mansion with all the cutting-edge tech toys he could handle while his father lived his own happily-ever-after. She'd be lucky if he wanted to live with her at all and…
Pan recognized the fact that her hormones were going off the charts, but that didn't stop her from entertaining the irrational thoughts that followed and spiraling even further. Before she could consider the consequences and ramifications of what she said next, the words slipped from her mouth, "he's not yours."
Trunks' brow knit tightly together, his lips sinking into a frown. He wasn't buying it. "Goten said you were almost due. I can do the math and…"
"Goten's wrong," she said.
"But Gohan…"
"It's not like I'm going to share his conception date with my family. I'm not due for a while," she insisted.
His eyes travelled back down to her belly, doubting that answer. As much as he wanted to wipe his forehead in relief and call it a night, she didn't look like she had 'a while' to go. She looked as though it was a matter of days. "How long?"
She glared at him. "It's none of your business."
"Pan, please," he pleaded, stepping towards her. At this distance, he could feel the little ki of the child inside of her. He was just close enough. He had a steep desire to put his hand on her stomach so he could feel him better, but he held back. He rubbed the bridge of his nose instead, knowing in his chest that she wasn't being honest. As his hand left his face again, the gold band around his left finger caught the light, shining brightly at her as though the object itself was bragging about its existence. "I know I hurt you, but lying about this…"
"You did hurt me," she snapped. "You hurt me so much, I went out and found a few willing people to rebound with. It was a chain of stupid decisions and one of them resulted in a baby. It's embarrassing to admit so I've been quiet about it. That's all."
He paused, suddenly doubting himself. Her answer was self-deprecating, and seemed like something she was not proud of. If she was lying, it was a good one. Getting pregnant from a rebound seemed plausible, and would explain why the Sons were unaware of who the father was. Part of him still knew she was lying, but a larger part of him was so hopeful that it might be the truth, he began to let himself accept it.
"That really doesn't seem like something you'd do," he said softly, entertaining the doubt he still felt.
She smiled wryly and shook her head. "How would you know?"
She had him there. They'd gotten to know each other again to a degree in the three months they'd been together, but they'd nearly been starting from scratch thanks to the large gap of time since they'd seen each other last; and that had been almost entirely his fault. There were plenty of things about her that had stayed the same, but there were also a lot of things that surprised him about her. Her boldness in the gravity room was a start. That same sexual brashness is what had caused her to jump into a long-term relationship with someone as terrible as her last boyfriend and not only had it been a bad choice, she'd allowed it to go on for two years. It might – it might also explain a reckless rebound and an unplanned baby. He was almost sold.
She rubbed her forehead, already regretting the lie. It tasted like honey to her tongue the moment it slipped out, but seeing the look of confusion and doubt in his eyes was quickly souring it. But it was too late now, or so she thought. Taking it back now would mean swallowing her pride in a bigger way than she had the guts to do. Her mother was right. If the baby came out with purple and blue eyes, there would be a lot of explaining to do, but in the meantime, she would be left alone.
"Go back to your honeymoon, Trunks," she said softly. "You didn't care about me until you thought I was having your child. Now that you know I'm not, you're free to walk away again."
Trunks' expression softened and he opened his mouth to argue, but he stopped himself. She looked too tired to continue, and she was right to feel the way she did. He hadn't handled anything with her correctly since he'd seen her in that very dojo the first time months ago. One misstep after another had led to this moment; it was no wonder she was done with him. Maybe giving her space was the best thing he could do for her.
He sighed and conceded to her desire, leaving her alone in the room without another word. He convinced himself she would own up to it eventually, if his suspicion was true, telling himself her continued silence would be evidence of her honesty that he wasn't the father. The mental assurance he'd given himself was just enough to quell his burning question, maybe just enough to move on with the new chapter of his life.
As he walked through the dojo grounds, he could feel the eyes of the man who had been in the room with her staring at him from inside his car. Trunks met the other man's narrow and suspicious stare for just a moment. He knew he was a fellow teacher, and had been with the dojo for a while. He and Pan probably worked together a lot, and judging by the fact that he was driving her home, he was obviously someone trusted.
That would make sense. She didn't say it was a one-night stand, he told himself, pushing down the voice in his head that still believed Pan was lying. For the moment, he put the matter away, flying back toward the beach resort where his new wife was waiting.
. . .
Arán never brought up a word of the interaction to Pan on their way to her house and she couldn't have been more grateful. Instead, he put her at ease about subbing in on her class and the other instructors that would be assisting, reiterating his willingness to drop off anything she forgot.
When they pulled up to her house, she gave him a chaste kiss on the cheek, appreciating his sensitivity to the issue and his eagerness to help. The smile he gave in return told her he was looking forward to more of that, but he was happy to wait until she was ready and on the other side of the big event.
Videl was waiting for her the moment she'd stepped inside, expecting a completely different outcome to her conversation with Trunks than what had actually happened. Pan was not happy with her in the first place, both for telling Trunks where he'd be able to find her and not warning her about his intention ahead of time. Videl obviously had an agenda by enabling the conversation and keeping it a surprise, and in a rare instance, her daughter was actually angry with her attempt to help. Videl felt a little bad about it, but mostly because it hadn't forced and admission of the truth like she'd hoped it would. In fact, it might've caused an even longer delay, as she learned Pan had boldly and blatantly lied to him.
Pan was too stressed to argue about it, and Videl knew she was too close to her due date to push a philosophical debate over the morality of the issue, so they both decided to drop the conversation for the time being. Videl was still certain that Pan would be forced to admit things the moment the boy was born. As far as Pan was concerned, her mother may be right eventually, but she would deal with it when it happened. For the moment, she just wanted her ki and her strength back, her son outside of her body, and she didn't want to think about his father again until after both of those things happened.
Just as Pan was about ready for bed, Videl handed her a small stack of bamboo steamers, and Pan's mood changed instantly. The baozi inside were supposed to be a comfort food for her, but after her conversation with Videl, they were now a sort of peace offering as well. Whatever her motivation was, Videl's gift of the little buns were exactly what she needed at that moment, filling her stomach with comfort, nostalgia, and warmth.
Despite her memory of making them with Trunks, bao would always bring images to mind of her grandparents first. These little treats represented home, security, and family to Pan – all her priorities wrapped in a delicious, doughy lump. As Pan sat at the table, enjoying the heat from the bun and the smell of the mix of meats and vegetables, the perfect name for her son popped into her head.