Ruby Pair

by Zim'sMostLoyalServant

After a chance meeting, Zim and Tenn team up. These are their adventures. Eventual Zim/Tenn.

7. Frosting the 13th

A/N: Hey all, welcome to the next chapter of the Ruby Pair saga. Full credit for the idea for this one has to go to Invader Johnny, who came up with the central concept and spun out a plot around it, with me adding my input to iron things out. He also wrote several scenes that I only slightly edited to fit, so be sure to give him a nod for that as well.

Not much more to say beyond that, except read on!

Disclaimer: Neither I nor Invader Johnny own Invader Zim or any related characters, much as we'd both like to.

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The Ruby Pair Series

Frosting the 13th

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It was a normal day at the Membrane household… which meant that there were the sounds of things breaking and exploding, and the occasional angry or pained screams, emanating from various parts of the house. The neighbors and random passersby on the street had long since gotten used to such noises, due to a combination of the Professor's home experiments, Dib's various oddities, and Gaz's outbursts whenever something raised her ire, so no one paid the house much heed even as the racket continued unabated.

However, it should be noted that for once, the disturbance was not being caused by any of the residence's actual residents. Instead, Zim had decided to stage a daring assault upon his nemesis in his own lair – in other words, kicking down the back door while a half-awake Dib was making his breakfast, shouting "aha!" as if that were a courageous battle cry, and leaping at him. The two had then devolved into a slap fight on the floor while Gaz watched in mild amusement from the kitchen table where she was having her own breakfast, though just before she could finally decide to intervene and smack both of them into submission, Tenn had come stumbling through the door as well, looking quite haggard.

For those curious, the reason for Tenn's state was that when Zim had proposed (read: shouted in her face) his intention to attack Dib, she had made it clear that she had no interest in taking part in it. Zim had of course been offended that his ally had refused to bear witness to what he knew would be his ultimate victory, so he had persisted in pestering her about joining him, only for her to keep saying no. So, he had finally done the only logical thing he could think of, and jumped Tenn so he could steal her PAK, forcing her to chase after him to the Membranes' house in order to retrieve it and avoid dying.

Needless to say, "logical" is a relative term when it came to Zim.

In any case, that was why Zim found himself being yanked off of Dib by a half-dead Tenn, forced to hand the PAK back over, and then being throttled by her as soon as her PAK was reattached.

"…And if you ever do something like that again, I will rip your squeedlyspooch out and beat you to death with it!" Tenn finished her rant several minutes into it, finally letting go of a thoroughly beaten Zim's neck and letting him fall to the floor in a heap.

"Probably should have seen that coming," Gaz stated to Zim with a snicker as he tried to compose himself. He glared up at her in response.

"Zim needs not to hear your commentary, Gaz-Beast," he snapped as he got back to his feet.

"Then get out of our house, before my patience runs out completely and I toss you out," she replied, eyes narrowing. Zim and Tenn both shuddered slightly in reaction to the intensity of even a slight glare coming from the purple-haired girl, the latter feeling it enough even when it wasn't directed at her that it was able to snap her out of her own anger and start thinking clearly again.

Which is how she was able to turn and easily smack the water gun and alien sleep cuffs out of Dib's hands as he tried to sneak up behind her.

"Really?" she asked, fixing him with a flat stare.

"Hey, you guys broke into my house first thing in the morning, did you really think I wouldn't try to take advantage of that?" he responded in annoyance.

"No, I just thought you'd be a little less blatantly obvious about it."

"Oh yeah? Well, I- Aha!" Dib started to say, only to cut himself off as he suddenly lunged at Tenn, who – having seen the move coming a mile away – simply rolled her eyes and sidestepped to avoid the attack, allowing Dib to smack into the kitchen counter and collapse onto the floor. And as a side effect, the impact caused a box that had been set on the edge of the counter to tip over and fall onto Dib.

"I told you to get rid of that junk," Gaz told her brother while he struggled to get out from under the box's spilled contents, and Zim laughed at his enemy's misfortune.

"This isn't junk! This is the broadcast surveillance equipment that lets me spy on alien transmissions!" Dib protested as he got back to his feet, which got Zim's attention enough to make him stop laughing.

"Bah, you actually think this pile of human dookie can pick up signals from civilizations far more advanced than anything this pitiful ball of mud could ever hope for?" he scoffed.

"Hey, I'll have you know that this 'human dookie' picked up an Irken broadcast just fine months before you got here, Spacejerk!" Dib snapped back, both Invaders blinking in surprise, "Some guy who I think was one of your leaders was giving a speech about galactic conquest, and someone else was saying something about curly fries, I think? Anyway, point is I heard it, so there!"

"Filthy lies!" Zim yelled, kicking one of the older model laptops that had spilled out of the box, still attached to a satellite dish. To everyone's surprise, this somehow turned it on, a squeal of static bursting from its speakers before being followed by someone speaking.

"Good morning, fellow Irkens! And what a magnificent day it is to continue to be of service to our great Empire," said a bombastic voice that Zim and Tenn immediately recognized as the Announcer, the main mouthpiece of the Irken News Network.

"Ha! Told you so!" Dib said smugly. However, before either of the Irkens could say anything in response, the Announcer continued speaking.

"And of course, today is that most extra special day of them all. Happy Frosting the 13th everyone!"

"Wait, that's today?!" Tenn exclaimed, her and Zim's eyes widening, while the transmission trailed off into garbled static and then shut off.

"Irk dammit, how did I lose track of the date like that?!" Zim growled to himself, "I swear, if GIR messed with the calendar again…"

"What the heck is Frosting the 13th?" Gaz asked, morbidly curious just because of the stupid name.

"Only the most important holiday on the Irken calendar," Tenn explained, "Every year, on the 13th day of the month of Frosting, the Control Brains celebrate the glory and prosperity of the Empire by giving free snacks to everyone. Dependent on rank, of course; obviously, as Invaders, we'd get much more than the average drone."

"Wait, back up, you guys have a month called 'Frosting'?" Dib asked in disbelief.

"Yes, between the months of Garnish and Pudding," Tenn replied in annoyance, as if she were explaining something obvious.

"…Are all your months named after food?"

"Enough of the blather!" Zim suddenly screamed, reminding everyone he was still there, "Zim must reluctantly stop short of completely annihilating you today, Dib-Stink, as I must return to my base to prepare for receiving my holiday snacks. But know that this is but a reprieve of a single day, as tomorrow I shall return and complete this flawless victory!"

Dib scowled in annoyance and opened his mouth to snap something back, only to be cut off with a wheeze as Gaz elbowed him in the stomach.

"This has gone on long enough. Do not say or do anything that will make them stay longer," she hissed at him.

As Dib coughed and tried to regain his breath, Zim strutted out of the house, clearly viewing this as a victory, while Tenn followed behind him, having already lost interest in the siblings.

"Yes, I can practically taste the snacks already," Zim said in an excited hiss as they made their way down the street, "Free holiday snacks always taste better than regular ones, you know."

Tenn nodded in agreement, but didn't bother speaking up, knowing Zim wasn't actually talking to her. Instead, she let her mind drift, thinking about how extra sweet the snacks would taste this year just because of context; she'd missed last Frosting the 13th due to her base being destroyed and her having to hide in Meekrob's wilderness. And with her then being exiled, she'd thought she'd never have another chance, but here she was, about to get those delicious snacks.

Lost in those thoughts, Tenn barely noticed as they returned to base, entering through Zim's house, until Zim started speaking at his normal volume again. Which meant practically screaming right into her antennae.

"Computer! Have Zim's holiday snacks arrived yet?!" he demanded as he dramatically tossed his disguise away. Tenn pointedly cleared her throat as she removed her own disguise, and glared at Zim when he turned to look at her. Rolling his eyes in response, he quickly added, "Yes, yes, and Tenn's too?"

"The what now?" the Computer asked, sounding genuinely confused.

"Has your hard drive crashed?" Zim snapped, glaring at the ceiling, "Today is Frosting the 13th, and that means all Irkens get free snacks!"

"Okay… but aren't you two, you know, exiled from the Empire? Why would you still be entitled to that?"

…

…

…

You could hear a pin drop in the silence as Zim and Tenn both stared at the ceiling for several solid minutes, processing what the Computer had just said. Then Tenn broke it, groaning loudly as she tugged at her antennae in frustration.

"How did that not occur to me?!" she yelled, "How could I overlook something so obvious? I'm turning into you!"

"No you're not, there's only one Zim!" Zim snapped at her, then shook his head as he forced himself to refocus on the matter at hand, "But never mind your ridiculous words, this is an outrage! Zim is the greatest Invader ever; if anyone deserves free holiday snacks, it's me!"

"Then I guess you won't enjoy this transmission I just picked up," the Computer stated, causing the monkey painting to retract on the wall and pop out the screen behind it, which flickered to life to display the Announcer in his trademark one-eyed helmet.

"And to mark just how much more glorious the Empire has been this year than normal thanks to the conquests of Operation Impending Doom II, the Almighty Tallest have, in their infinite wisdom and kindness, decreed a highly generous gift of twice the normal amount of snacks for the greatest Invader in the Armada – Invader Larb!" the Announcer declared, before a smaller screen suddenly popped up next to him, displaying Larb lying on the Universe's Most Comfortable Couch, only for a gigantic pile of snacks to suddenly drop out of the air on top of him. After a moment, his head popped back out, and after looking around at all the snacks surrounding him, he gave an enthusiastic "whoo!" in celebration.

"Are you flirking kidding me?" Tenn growled, "Why in Irk's sweet name do they insist on calling Larb of all Irkens the greatest Invader? He hasn't earned it, he just gets all the easy assignments!"

"I know, right?" Zim agreed, just as angry as she was, "Most of the planets he was sent to were barely at a post-industrial level, so practically all he had to do to take over was show up! The only moderately impressive conquest he has on his list is Vort, and it's not like that was difficult!"

"Tell me about it. I hear all he did was walk into their main military headquarters on a fake friendly visit, then shut off all their defense systems when no one was looking," Tenn said, glaring at the now thankfully muted screen, on which Larb was practically swimming through his unearned prize.

"Well, this will not stand! Zim will not allow the blatant insult of not only being denied my rightful prize, but Larb getting what should be mine!" Zim declared.

"Is this going to be the burrito restaurant thing again?" the Computer asked dryly.

"The what now?" Tenn asked, narrowing an eye in confusion.

"No, and never mention that again!" Zim snapped, ignoring Tenn's question if he even heard it, "There's no point in trying to one-up Larb when I still haven't earned my way back into my proper place as the Tallest's favorite, so I will do the next best thing – we're going to steal those snacks!"

"Wait, what?!" Tenn exclaimed, "Are you insane- wait, never mind, forgot who I was talking to for a second. But Zim, even you must realize that's a moronic idea!"

"No it's not, Zim's ideas are never anything short of brilliant!" Zim huffed, "Zim is the greatest Invader ever, and you're a relatively close second-"

"Gee, thanks," Tenn said flatly, only to be ignored again.

"-And between the two of us and the fact that Larb is a lazy, overconfident fool, there's no reason we can't succeed!" Zim declared.

"Maybe. But what about the entire literal army of highly-trained Irken soldiers that's also stationed on Vort to enforce the occupation? Did you forget about them?" Tenn demanded, "Individually, we might be better than any of them, but quantity has a quality of its own."

"Don't worry, Zim has the perfect plan to deal with the slight inconvenience of us being horribly outnumbered," Zim replied as he started to exit the room, "Meet me in the Voot hanger in an hour. I'm going to go grab everything I think we might need; I suggest you do likewise."

"…This is going to happen no matter what I say, isn't it?" Tenn said after a few moments of processing what just happened.

"Yep. Probably going to be a disaster, too," the Computer commented, "Good luck with all that."

"Thanks," Tenn sighed, walking off towards her own side of the base to see what she could use to try and salvage this fiasco.

XXXXXXX

Gaz was playing her Game Slave IV… again. She would never admit it, but sometimes, there were days when she felt that no video game was fun enough these days. She craved a challenge, and the closest she ever got to that was when Zim took her to Arcadikon that one time when he was desperate to scare Dib. Sure, she got all the high scores, but that was mainly because the other alien gamers were wimps and hardly capable of making her break a sweat; ultimately, the only game that she couldn't beat was "Dancing Arcade Game but for Aliens".

"What a stupid name for a game," Gaz thought with a sneer. And the only reason she couldn't beat it was simply because the Invader with the high score on the game bought the machine, and paid Arcadikon security to prevent anyone else from getting near it as a desperate attempt to keep that high score. Gaz didn't recall the name of the Invader, nor did she care. All she knew was that no game should be kept from her, and while she had no interest in playing a dancing game, it was the principal of the thing!

"I'll get back to Arcadikon, beat up those guards, and get that high score if it's the last thing I do!" she ground out through gritted teeth, before pausing and grimacing as something occurred to her.

"No, stop that, I'm not about to start talking to myself," she thought firmly, "I'm not my idiot brother, after all."

The young gamer, shaking off the self-annoyance, found herself craving a soda. After all, all this daydreaming about revenge got her thirsty.

Gaz walked over to the kitchen, opened the fridge, and raised an eyebrow in mild surprise and more than a little anger.

"What… the… hell?!"

Minimoose and GIR were inside the refrigerator, eating waffles.

"Guess who made waffles outta Flamin' Hot Cheezos and soap!" GIR cheered happily, before taking a bite out of the questionably-made breakfast.

"Nyah!"

"Want some?" GIR asked, holding a spoonful of waffle near Gaz's face. The scary human simply slammed the fridge door in anger.

"Zim, I know you're here somewhere!" Gaz snarled with a rage so intense, the kitchen turned into a scorched inferno, "Come out from whatever horrible place you're hiding before I find you and tear your spleen out with my bare hands!"

Zim's evil laughter filled the kitchen.

"Foolish Earth creature!" Zim said arrogantly, "Irkens have no need for spleens! My squeedlyspooch is far more amazing than any of your human organs!"

Gaz, however, wasn't paying attention to the Irken's gloating. She had known Zim long enough by now to know that he just loved the sound of his own voice, so she simply took that to her advantage as she (reluctantly) allowed Zim to continue talking.

"Which reminds me," Gaz hissed in the response, "I want my liver back, Zim! You never gave it back after you stole it that time you were taking everyone's organs at skool! I've been stuck using an artificial one my dad made!"

"And you'll never get it back, little Gaz!" Zim taunted as he continued to laugh evilly.

Gaz looked under the kitchen table and a few chairs; Zim was a lot of things, but never subtle when it came to his endeavors, so she knew he was close. But where?

"You'll never find me, human!" Zim said smugly, "I'm too ingenious for the likes of you!"

Next thing the Irken knew, a huge boot kicked open the door of the bathroom he was hiding in, and he was suddenly face-to-face with an enraged human.

In a pathetic attempt to save face, Zim yelled out, "Don't you know it's rude to come in when someone has the MIGHTY need to use the restroom?!"

"What's with you and toilets, anyway?" Gaz asked, "You know what? Scratch that, I don't care, you can be weird somewhere else after I beat the living snot out of you."

"GIR! DEFENSIVE MODE!"

The SIR Unit came flying out of the fridge and right towards the bathroom. He immediately got between his master and the human girl, his red eyes menacingly glaring at Gaz for five seconds before they turned back to his normal cyan color and he burped out an old camera.

"Let's make a photo album!" GIR said cheerfully, "An album made of nachos!"

"Let's," Gaz surprisingly agreed, before she cracked her knuckles.

"No, WAIT!"

Zim never got to finish what he was going to say, as Gaz mercilessly started to beat him up. All the while, GIR took photos while laughing insanely.

"Aw, they look so cute!"

Two Hours Later:

Zim was a bloody mess; some bones could be seen coming out of his skin, and he was sure that his legs weren't meant to bend that way. All in all, he was lucky – he had seen the horrors that the Gaz-Beast was capable of inflicting onto others, so the fact that he was only hurt on 70% of his body meant that the human wasn't interested in dooming him, simply causing him physical pain.

"I think my squeedlyspooch has some internal bleeding," the Invader moaned in pain.

"Whiner," Gaz sneered, "And why are you still here? I'm bored with you; if I stopped beating you up, it's because I want you out of my house."

"Zim is here because I require your assistance, Gaz-Human," the Irken tried to say without choking on his own blood, "Ahh! My squeedlyspooch!"

"Whiner," Gaz repeated, "And whatever you want, the answer is no, I've got more important things to do than to help an alien with delusions of grandeur."

"Eh?" Zim asked, confused by what that last comment meant.

"Photos are developed!" GIR and Minimoose into the living room and handed the human the pictures of her beating up Zim from certain angles. Now, Gaz was hardly one to be impressed by anything, but she was able to give respect when she saw something that caught her attention. And the fact that GIR of all people managed to develop these photos in such high quality without using any digital technology was impressive… sorta.

"I'm keeping these," Gaz said evilly as she taunted the Invader by holding the photos so close and yet so far from him, as Zim was not capable of moving his arms from the immense pain he was feeling. All he could do was glare hatefully at the human.

"GIR!" he shouted, "Obey your master and carry me back to the base! Coming here was a waste of my amazing time!"

"Can we fly the pig?" GIR asked.

"No, GIR!"

"Awww…"

Gaz, meanwhile, had stopped listening and begun playing her video game again.

"Nyah!"

Gaz looked up from her game and raised an eyebrow at the floating purple moose.

"Yeah, I heard about the Irken snack holiday or whatever," she grunted, "Don't really care."

"Nyah!"

"You're kidding," she sneered, "Why should I help?"

"Nyah!"

"Yeah, I've been to Arcadikon," Gaz grunted, "Played all the games except one."

"Nyah!"

"Dancing Arcade Game but for Aliens."

"Nyah!"

"Oh, really?" Gaz asked with mild interest, "You promise?"

"Nyah!"

"Then you got yourself a deal," Gaz said as she and Minimoose shook hands/nubs on it.

All the while, Zim gaped at what he just witnessed.

"Curse you Minimoose and your oratory skills!"

"You're just mad because he's better at this than you. Let's go," Gaz stated, kicking Zim harshly in the side, somehow causing all his bones to snap back into place. Grumbling painfully to himself and glaring at her, Zim took a moment to puff himself up proudly, and then marched out the door, the others behind him.

XXXXXXX

In the Membranes' garage, Dib was banging on the Tak Ship's cockpit, which was stubbornly refusing to open for him.

"Ship! Come on, let me in!" Dib said desperately, "The fate of the world is at stake here!"

"Two things. One, this world sucks ass," the Ship replied with contempt, "And two, you say that so much that the phrase has lost all meaning."

"But Zim…"

"Oy, here we go again!" the Ship interrupted with great annoyance, "It's always Zim this and Zim that! Why don't you get another hobby that doesn't involve that green idiot, and leave me out of it!"

"What I do isn't a hobby!" Dib countered, "I'm the sole protector of Earth, and it's my job to stop Zim from obliterating all life on the planet!"

"What you are is a big-headed human with delusions of grandeur," the Ship replied with a sneer in its voice, "You think you can stop an invasion? A real one? Zim is the worst Invader the Irken Empire ever had, and it's only by sheer luck that he hasn't exploded into a billion pieces from his own stupidity."

"Yeah, but… now he has Tenn by his side!" Dib said, trying to justify his heroic efforts, "And clearly, she's just as dangerous as Zim."

"No one is as dangerous as Zim!" the Ship bellowed angrily, "That idiot has caused more damage to the universe than anyone else in its history! The only reason why Tenn is here is because she has no other place to go."

"Say what?"

"Oh right, you don't know, do you?" the Ship said, "Whatever, I don't really care if you know or don't, Tenn used to be one of the top – if not the best – Invader that the Irken Armada had to offer, but due to a horrible situation that is still being investigated, she failed to conquer her assigned planet and was dishonorably discharged because she cowardly fled instead of trying to finish her mission like a soldier should."

"And you know this, how?"

"Because unlike your so-called fast Wi-Fi that you humans boast about to get information across your planet, Irken social media is far more effective," the Ship replied almost proudly, "News travels fast within the Empire in mere nanoseconds across many planets in different galaxies."

"And why am I just hearing this now?" Dib asked in frustration. It really got under his skin that he had a more effective means to receive news about what was going on across the stars and he didn't even know it.

"Because I hate you," the Ship said bluntly, "But that's not the point! What I was saying before you interrupted me was that you saw for yourself the enormity of both the Massive and the Armda when the Earth was entering the Florpus, so tell me, human – do you honestly believe that you alone could save your pathetic little planet against the might of the Irken race?!"

"I've been doing just fine against Zim," the boy said stubbornly, "If I can fight against someone as crazy as him, then I'm sure I could find a way against the Armada!"

"Now I know you don't get enough blood in that big head of yours," the Ship said dryly.

"For the last time, my head's not big!" Dib shouted, annoyed, "Now please, Ship, we've wasted enough time! I need your help to figure out what Zim's planning for this messed up holiday! I just know he's going after more than just snacks, he's after something more… evil!"

"I like evil," the Ship said, "But I hate Zim, and I hate you, so if I help you, you're happy but if I don't help you then Zim is happy, quite the conundrum… oh look, there he is."

Blinking, Dib turned around to look out the open garage door, and his eyes widened as he saw that Zim of all people was getting out of his house, alongside his two demented minions, and…

"GAZ?!"

Indeed, his little sister was riding the purple moose without a care in the world. Zim, meanwhile, was laughing maniacally.

"Soon, Larb's snacks will be mine!"

"Be quiet!" Gaz sneered.

"Nyah!"

"Yes, Minimoose! I agree!" Zim said dramatically, "Onward to vengeance!"

Dib watched with horror as Minimoose's eyes glowed red, and the next thing he knew, a sphere-like thing materialized from his nubby horns, getting bigger and bigger until he, Zim, GIR and Gaz were all inside. Then the sphere's light intensified, blinding. Once the light cleared, all that was left behind was a crater where the foursome once stood.

"That moose always has to be such a showoff," the Tak Ship sneered, "I don't see the point of the whole teleportation show, Zim's base is only a few blocks away."

Dib, however, gaped at what he witnessed.

"Zim just kidnapped my sister!"

"I hardly think that was the case," the Ship said, uninterested, "But I know you won't listen, so go ahead, rant away while I mute you."

Indeed, while Dib was going on and on about how he was going to save Gaz from the Irken's "evil clutches", the Ship turned off its hearing so as to have a few minutes of peace.

"I should have done this a long time ago," the Ship muttered to itself.

XXXXXXX

Meanwhile, back at Zim's base, Tenn was watching some Earth animated show that was having a one year marathon on TV.

"We'll be back with more of Floopsy Bloops Shmoopsy after a word from our sponsor," the announcer said, "Which is more of Floopsy and Shmoopsy, because we want your money."

"Why is this horrible cartoon so hypnotic?!" Tenn asked exasperated, "What are Floopsy and Shmoopsy even supposed to be?!"

"I think Floopsy is a walrus without tusks, and Shmoopsy is supposed to be a beaver," the Computer replied, "I don't even know why anyone still watches this, everyone basically bloops Shmoopsy at this point, it's quite predictable, but then again you don't see this yet; you're only on season one, there's 500 seasons to go."

Tenn's eyes widened with horror.

"NOOO!"

But then, her unlikely heroes arrived as a sphere of pure energy appeared out of nowhere in the middle of the living room, creating a crater and (thankfully) destroying the television screen, which in turn Tenn from the hypnotic control the horrible show had on her.

"Nyah!"

Gaz got off of Minimoose and replied with a shrug.

"Meh, once you've been teleported more than once, the warranty for interest expires."

"Look at this place!" Zim said annoyed, "I leave for just a few minutes, and the base is a mess! What the hell happened?!"

"NO!" GIR cried out once he saw the television was destroyed, "WHY?! I love you, TV! I loved you!"

"I'm free! FREE!" Tenn jumped out from the couch in excitement, "Free from that mind-numbing torture!"

"Not that I care, but what are you talking about?!" Gaz asked with a raised eyebrow.

"She was watching Floopsy Bloops Shmoopsy," the Computer explained.

"Oh," Zim, Gaz, and GIR said as they nodded in understanding. Tenn, meanwhile, finally noticed the human in the room.

"Hold on, what is she doing here?"

"The Gaz-Beast is here to assist us with our mission to Vort," Zim explained.

"You have got to be kidding!" Tenn said in frustration, "Where's your pride, Zim? I know she's freakishly strong, but we're Irkens, we don't ask inferior species for help!"

Next thing the former Invader knew, she ended up on the floor with a black eye, courtesy of Gaz.

"Okay, I stand corrected," Tenn grudgingly admitted, "The human can come."

Gaz, for her part, looked down at the Irken with contempt.

"Let me be quite honest here, I don't care what you two want to gain from this stupid trip," Gaz said with indifference, "But I expect to get my end of the deal one way or another, got it?"

"Nyah!"

"Good!" Gaz said, before she started playing with her Game Slave.

Tenn looked at Zim quizzically. "What deal?"

"Not important," Zim waved his hand dismissively, "We must now prepare ourselves for the greatest heist in history!"

"You two are stealing snacks from a more successful Invader just to be petty," Gaz pointed out dryly, "I hardly consider your idiotic mission as great. If anything, it's just sad."

Zim and Tenn only glared at the human, not that she cared.

"I WANT TAQUITOS!" GIR yelled out, "And a clown with no head!"

Tenn could only moan in despair.

"This is going to be a long and horrible trip."

XXXXXXX

Dib limped all the way towards Zim's house. To his great annoyance, Tak's Ship continued to refuse to aid him in his mission to save the Earth from Zim, saying it was a "waste of time", which in retrospect was ironic, since the Ship was technically immortal given that it wasn't alive to begin with, and as such had plenty of time on its nonexistent hands.

Dib, however, couldn't accept this, and instead tried to force his way into the Ship's cockpit, an action the Irken vessel did not take lightly. The end result was an electrocution experience that the young hero didn't want to repeat. And as an added bonus, the Ship ended up sitting on his head (somehow not crushing it in the process) while shouting, "HOW DO YOU LIKE IT?! HUH?! HUH?! It's not pleasant having a butt on top of you, is it? IS IT?!"

"Not to self, find some sort of alien therapist to figure out the Ship's problem with butts," Dib said out loud, "And one for me to help me with my issue with talking to myself."

As the young boy made his way towards his mortal enemy's house, he failed to notice that he wasn't the only one heading in that direction. Someone else was walking nearby with a smile on his face, a song in his heart and a bouquet of genetically-engineered "meat flowers" he bought from the local butcher in hand.

"Tenn, here I come!"

XXXXXXX

Meanwhile, back at Zim's base, the Irkens were putting in as much equipment as they could possibly need for their mission. All the while, Gaz kept playing her Game Slave while Minimoose was looking over her shoulder.

"Nyah!"

"Yes, vampire piggies at 6, 7, and 8 o'clock, I see them," Gaz replied boredly, "Don't you have anything better to do than to annoyingly watch me play?"

"Nyah!"

"You're waiting for me to die so you can have a go at it?" Gaz asked incredulously, "What makes you think I would let you play with my Game Slave?"

"Nyah!"

Minimoose popped some metallic tentacles out of his nubby horns, which connected to the Game Slave. Gaz's eyes widened in shock, but soon narrowed with unimaginable rage, a feeling that was soon replaced with curiosity and wonder as Minimoose's eyes displayed a holographic version of the Vampie Piggy Hunter game.

Gaz was impressed, but instead of showing it, she simply shrugged and continued playing, though she still had the decency to reply.

"Meh… fine, you can have a turn."

"Nyah!"

The Irkens, meanwhile, looked on at what just happened with confusion.

"What did we just see?" Tenn asked.

"Something horrible," Zim sneered, "I believe this is what humans call friendship… pathetic, my sidekicks shouldn't take part in such actions, it is beneath Irken glory!"

"Come on, Piggy!" GIR yelled out excitedly, running towards the Voot Cruiser holding a confused pig, "Let's take a trip to the planet of the couch potatoes!"

Zim, for his part, slapped his forehead in despair, while Tenn looked at him mockingly.

"This planet has corrupted my sidekicks," Zim said, trying to save face, "Earth is full of horrible things that make anyone lose their sanity!"

"How would you know?" Gaz sneered, "I hardly think of you as the poster boy for sanity."

Tenn snickered at that comment, because it was so true. Zim, meanwhile, only glared at the human girl.

"ENOUGH!" he shouted, "We have wasted enough time! We must leave for Vort before the holiday is over!"

Gaz only replied by throwing a squid at his head.

"AHHHHH!" the Irken shouted, trying to get the squid off of his face, "NOT THE BRAIN-EATING SQUID!"

"That thing's going to starve," Gaz said dryly.

Tenn could only nod in agreement.

Eventually, Zim was free from the squid, which he quickly stuffed into a containment box. He never stopped glaring at Gaz throughout this, who in turn just gave him the finger, something that puzzled Tenn, as she never saw that gesture before.

"What's that?" she asked.

"What's what?" Gaz grunted.

"You pointed your middle finger at Zim," Tenn said, "What that supposed to mean? Is it a human thing?"

Before Gaz could reply, Zim interjected.

"It's a hand gesture which humans refer to as giving someone the bird, even if there are no birds involved," Zim sneered, "Whatever you do, I would advise you to NOT do it in Skool. Zim was tricked into doing so during my early time on Earth, and I ended up having to go through a year of detention because of that!"

"Oops, my bad," Gaz smirked darkly, "That was for using me as an umbrella."

"I hate you so much, Gaz-Beast," Zim sneered, "Not as much as I hate your brother, but I still hate you."

"And yet you need my help," she retorted smugly.

Zim's eye began twitching uncontrollably.

"Oh! Master's head is going to explode!" GIR said, obliviously happy, "Like that one time mine did when piggies went into the past!"

"GIR! I told you to never bring that up again!" Zim said, shuddering in horror, "The piggies are not meant to be used to cause Zim pain!"

Tenn and Gaz shared a glance, as if they were non-verbally asking each other what he was talking about. When neither of them had an answer, they instead looked at the ceiling, where the Computer coughed.

"Don't look at me, I have no idea what he's talking about."

"NEVERMIND THAT!" Zim bellowed angrily, "We have other priorities! Now, everyone get ready! Larb won't know what hit him!"

Zim then began snickering evilly, which soon turned into a very loud maniacal laugh. In response, Gaz once more hit him with the closest blunt object she could find; this time, it was GIR himself.

"Thank you!" Tenn said gratefully, "His laughter gets on my nerves."

"Now you know how I feel when I have to hear my brother talk," the young human replied.

XXXXXXX

Meanwhile, Dib was still limping all the way to Zim's base. He grinned once he saw the green structure on the horizon.

"FINALLY!" Dib shouted, "Walking all the way here took longer than usual. Maybe I should have asked Dad for a ride…"

Before he could ponder it further, the ground began to shake.

"WHOA! What the…?"

Suddenly, Zim's house began to open up and withdraw into the ground. Dib's eyes widened; he knew what this meant.

"Oh no!" he shouted as he ran towards the new hole in the ground, "Zim's leaving the planet, and most likely taking my sister with him! I won't let him! Don't worry, Gaz! I'm coming!"

"Oh! Now that's some fancy garage," a voice said happily. Jumping in surprise at the unexpected words, Dib spun to face the voice's origin, and blinked in confusion.

"Keef? What are you doing here?" he asked, staring at the perpetually-cheerful redhaired boy standing nearby.

"I came to visit Tenn. Do you know if she's home?" Keef replied, completely unaffected by the sight of the giant gaping hole where Zim's house used to be, which only made Dib's eye twitch.

"Are you kidding me?! Don't you see what's happening here? Tenn's an alien, just like Zim, and they're both about to fly off to do something evil, with my sister as a hostage!" Dib ranted angrily, which had no effect on Keef whatsoever.

"Oh, so she's down in that big garage?" Keef asked, walking over next to Dib to peer into the hole-

SMACK

Which meant that the rear of the Voot smacked into him as it suddenly accelerated upwards, snagging his shirt on a cord extending from one of the engine pods, dragging him along with it. And unfortunately for Dib, Keef's free hand instinctively shot out for support and ended up grabbing his arm, meaning the bigheaded boy was also dragged along screaming as the Voot zoomed upwards into the upper reaches of the atmosphere.

For a few horrifying moments, Dib was sure he was about to die, either being incinerated by the acceleration or freezing and suffocating once they hit space. But luckily, his fortune had a sudden reversal, as the Computer's voice suddenly called out "Emergency Lifeform Protection Protocol Engaged", right before a glowing aura wrapped around the two humans, and suddenly they found themselves teleported inside the Voot, landing on top of its already-present passengers.

"Oof!" Dib said as he collided into his enemy's space.

"Ugh, Dib-Human!" Zim hissed angrily, "What are you doing here?! I didn't recruit you for this very important mission!"

"I'm here to rescue my sister from your evil clutches, Spaceboy!" Dib shot back.

"Does it look like I need rescuing, idiot?" Gaz snapped, offended at being treated like a damsel in distress, though her overeager brother didn't seem to hear her.

Whatever Zim was going to say in response to this was interrupted by Keef, who gave Tenn an adoring look and the meat flowers.

"These are for you!" he said as he handed her the flowers, which made the Irken scream in pain. She didn't think twice about it, she dropped the flowers and stomped on them for good measure, before she sprayed some pepper spray into Keef's eyes.

"AHH! I'm blind!" the redheaded boy shouted in pain, "Unless I'm blinded with love?"

Zim growled in contempt, before he looked back at his control panel.

"First thing's first, get rid of the human pest," he said under his breath as he pressed a button, which resulted in Keef being ejected from the Voot and into the cold vacuum of space.

"WEEE!" he squealed cheerfully, unaware that he was moments away from dyng from lack of air… until a wormhole appeared and swallowed him before it closed up.

Everyone just took a moment to process what just happened.

"What did I just see?" Gaz asked, somewhat interested, "Did that idiot just die?"

"Yeah, did he?!" Tenn asked, hoping for confirmation.

"Not yet, but he will soon," Zim said evilly. Dib, for his part, felt a sense of déjà vu.

"You still have that wormhole" the young paranormal investigator demanded of his hated enemy, with an accusing finger.

"Of course I do, Dib-Stink!" Zim sneered, "I did pay good monies for it! I wasn't about to let it go to waste!"

"Wait, back it up!" Tenn said as she looked at the other Irken, "Zim, you have a wormhole?! How did you manage to get your hands on one of those?! They're quite expensive, I didn't even have the luxury to get one to save time on my trip to Meekrob!"

"If Zim can get a pair of Microgoggles from Callnowia, then I am certainly amazing enough to get my own wormhole!" the Defective gloated.

"That doesn't make any sense!"

"I sang the Doom Song until my master got a wormhole he liked from the sales guy!" GIR said happily.

"Okay, now that makes sense," Gaz commented dryly.

"I'm going to sing the Doom song now!"

"NO!" Zim and Tenn yelled out simultaneously.

"Aww!"

"Excuse me?!" Dib shouted, "But are we forgetting the fact that you just killed Keef?!"

"Why do you care?" Gaz sneered, "You find him annoying like the rest of us, and don't lie, I bet you're as happy as the rest of us that he's gone."

"Okay… yeah," Dib reluctantly admitted, "Doesn't mean I like the idea of Zim killing one of our classmates… even if he's a nuisance."

"I didn't kill him," Zim pointed out, "The Moose, however, will!"

"I'm sorry… the Moose?" Tenn asked, confused.

"Nyah!"

"Yes, I sent Keef to a Room With a Moose!" Zim said dramatically.

"That has got to be the stupidest thing I ever heard!" Tenn snapped, "You had an infinite number of dimensions available, and you choose one with a stupid moose in it?!"

"Nyah!" Minimoose squeaked, sounding offended.

"Hey! Don't insult the Moose!" Zim said, "And look what you did, you made Minimoose sad! Apologize to my sidekick!"

"You've got to be kidding!"

"Zim never kids," he said seriously, "APOLOGIZE!"

"Ugh, fine. Minimoose, I'm sorry or whatever."

"Nyah!"

"That's better!" Zim said, satisfied, "Now, let's not worry about Keef's doom, we still have a long road ahead to Vort."

"Wait… you said you still use the wormhole?" Dib asked suspiciously.

"Yes, Dib-Filth."

"Are you saying you've used it on other humans?"

"Ugh, I should have known you would annoy Zim with your pathetic desire to save your fellow humans," Zim said with contempt, "Okay, fine, if you must know, Dib-Stink, I've been using the wormhole to send the tax humans that come to Zim's home away."

Gaz couldn't help but laugh evilly.

"Well, that's one way to deal with the man."

"I believe there were many of these men, Gaz-Beast," Zim replied obliviously, "But they kept bothering Zim! And I wasn't about to give some of my hard-earned monies to these inferior tax-humans!"

Meanwhile

Keef landed in the blank void that was the Room With a Moose. As he did, he noticed that he wasn't the only one who had made his way to this dimension – as it turned out, there were corpses of several people wearing suits scattered about.

"It's a little early for Halloween, isn't it?" Keef said obliviously. Then he looked at the Moose in the middle of the room.

"Hi there!" Keef greeted cheerfully, "You look like a happy moose! Wanna go to the circus?"

The Moose, for his part, only kept eating the walnuts that he received every now and then.

"I can see that we're going to be good friends!" Keef said.

The Moose then sat on him.

Back on the Voot

"Nyah!"

"Eh?" Zim asked confused, "What are you talking about, Minimoose?"

"Nyah!"

"The Moose that failed to destroy Dib?" he repeated, "What about it?"

"Nyah!"

"No! It wasn't like that! I just needed something to get rid of that human!" Zim snapped, "The salesman of the wormhole was very convincing! Said the Moose was terrifying and would break my enemies' knees!"

"Nyah!"

"What do you want me to say, Minimoose?!" Zim asked, exasperated, "Yes, I had another moose minion before you!"

"Nyah!"

"What?! NO! I didn't like him more than you! You're a better moose!"

"Nyah!"

Minimoose didn't believe his creator and levitated away, taking a seat next to Gaz.

"Ugh!" Zim groaned, "What is it with my sidekicks! One is insane and the other is a jealous mess?!"

"Well, that's a first," Dib said, "And kinda sad, never seen a jealous moose before."

"Whatever, I just don't care," Tenn groaned, "It's bad enough that Keef followed you just to try and win my affection-"

Everyone shuddered in disgust at that.

"-Now I'm seeing some drama between an idiot and his moose!" she continued, "It's like a bad soap opera!"

"I agree," Zim said, "…Hey, wait a minute!"

"Shut it!" Tenn snapped, "Right now, I just want some quiet time until we reach Vort."

"How long is it going to take to reach that planet, anyway?" Dib asked.

"Normally, stink-beast, a trip like this would take about six to seven months," Zim explained, "But seeing as we're on a deadline and we want to get there before Frosting the 13th is over, I will simply take the Voot Cruiser on hyperdrive, and we should get there in about three hours."

"And it's three hours I want you all to shut up during!" Tenn snapped, "I already deal with all of you and your crazy shenanigans on a daily basis, and we're in space! It's supposed to be quiet here!"

"I'm bored!" GIR bellowed, "I wanna watch the Scary Monkey Show!"

"There's no monkey in space, GIR!" Zim growled, "I hate that monkey."

"Aww," the SIR Unit said in disappointment, but then he squealed insanely as an idea came into his demented little mind, "Oh! I know, I'll watch Floopsy Bloops Shmoopsy instead!"

Suddenly the Voot became so silent that if you dropped a needle on the floor, you could hear it.

"GIR, there's no Floopsy Bloops Shmoopsy in space either," Tenn said tentatively.

"I ate the DVDs," GIR replied happily with a smile, and to the horror of everyone, the robot's eyes turned into projectors, and the holographic images of Floopsy and Shmoopsy appeared.

"I bloop you, Shmoopsy!" Floopsy said cheerfully.

Zim, Tenn, and Dib collided with the cockpit windshield as if trying to escape, and screamed "NOOOOO!" in despair.

Meanwhile, Gaz put on a pair of earphones so she could only hear the music from her Game Slave.

"Pshh, whiners!"

Three Hours Later

"Oh, thank Irk," Tenn moaned in relief as the Voot dropped out of hyperspace and emerged in orbit over the purple orb that was Vort, surrounded by its three moons and numerous space stations, "That was the longest trip of my life. Now it can stop!"

"You heard what Tenn said, GIR, we're here! Shut off the endless blooping!" Zim snapped, at his wit's end.

"I don't wanna!" GIR replied, as the videos continued playing.

"GIR, obey your master! We need to focus on enacting my brilliant plan!"

"You know, I just realized something," Dib commented, "Why have I just been sitting here this whole time when I've been trying to stop you?!"

"Because you're a moron?" Gaz suggested flatly.

Before anyone else could say anything in the brewing scream match, however, an alarm blared from the Voot's console. Everyone turned to face it, and saw that while they hadn't been looking, a squadron of other Irken ships had suddenly surrounded them.

"Unidentified vessel, you are trespassing in secure orbital space," a voice came over the communications panel, "Surrender immediately or be blown up."

"How dare they threaten Zim?! Don't they know who I am?!" Zim screeched.

"No, because we're supposed to be sneaking in for his stupid plan of yours," Tenn reminded him with a scowl.

"Oh, right," Zim said, chastised. Then he yelped as GIR suddenly shoved him aside and jammed a cable from his head into the console.

"Hi, new friends! Wanna watch Floopsy Bloops Shmoopsy with me?" he yelled, as he started transmitting the show onto all the other ships.

"GIR! What are you… eh?" Zim started to yell, only to trail off as the other ships started floating off, their pilots apparently suddenly very distracted.

"What is this?" the voice spoke up again, "I've never seen anything like it. The blooping… it's mesmerizing."

Everyone on the Voot blinked and looked at each other in confusion, before Zim's eyes lit up in inspiration.

"You want this nightmare show? You can have it!" he yelled, before gabbing GIR, unplugging him from the console, and throwing him toward the escape pod.

"OOF!"

The escape pod that Dib was unfortunately for him standing right in front of, causing him to be knocked into it with GIR, being launched away with him as the pod closed and detached from the Voot, flying down towards the planet's surface. And as it did, the patrol ships went after it.

"Come back! We must see more of the blooping!"

"Ha! Once more, Zim's brilliance achieves victory!" Zim cackled.

"…I have my issues with Dib, but for your sake, that better not have just killed him," Gaz said, glaring at Zim.

"Meh, he'll be fine. Probably," Zim replied flippantly, as he started flying towards the surface. A few minutes later, they'd touched down on a landing field that was mostly devoid of ships, and ran out of the Voot towards the large imposing building nearby.

"This is the main control center for this primary prison complex, where they keep all the most important prisoners," Zim explained to the others as he started hacking into the controls for the front door, "This is the perfect place to strike in order to undermine Larb!"

"If it's so important, why's there no security?" Gaz asked, looking at the deserted area around them, "I know it's some dumb holiday and all, but I figured they'd still have people on standby just in case."

"Either everyone went chasing after Dib and GIR, or Larb's just that incompetent," Tenn replied with a shrug, "Honestly, it's even odds."

"Never mind Larb's stupidity, we're in!" Zim crowed, as the door slid open. The group then quickly made their way through a twisting series of corridors until they reached the door to what Zim declared to be the main security control room. Opening it just enough to peer inside, they were greeted by the sight of a pair of Irken guards hunched over a console.

"Attention all units, the large-headed alien child and his SIR Unit have managed to get inside the complex!" one of them barked into a communicator, "Deploy by squads, cut them off from any escape routes and capture them!"

"And be sure to hook up the SIR to the comms systems when you do, so that everyone can watch that programming at once!" the other one added, "I don't want anyone finding out if Shmoopsy bloops Floopsy before me!"

"Dude, that'll never happen. It's clearly an unrequited blooping," the first guard said sagely, shaking his head.

"What would you know about blooping, you-"

SMACK

"Okay, that's enough about blooping," Tenn said flatly, having grabbed both guards' heads from behind and slammed them together, knocking them both out. She then dragged them both over to a nearby garbage chute and unceremoniously threw them both down it.

"Glad to know you 'superior' Irkens take security so seriously," Gaz said dryly, "Ah well, at least we know Dib's okay, so you're off the hook for now."

"Yeah, that's great," Zim said without paying attention to her, as he quickly typed a series of commands into the console, bringing up a map of the complex with several areas highlighted in red, "Time for you to uphold your end of the bargain, scary purple human. These are the areas where you can do the most damage. So, take your weapons of choice and-"

"Nyah!"

"Eh?" Zim blinked, facing his minion, "What are you talking about?"

"Nyah!"

"Are you still on about that?! I already said I prefer you over that other moose!"

"Nyah!"

"Fine! You want to help her, you can, but you have nothing to prove!"

"Nyah!" Minimoose squeaked triumphantly before, to everyone's shock, his body disassembled into a myriad of pieces and glowing lights, which flew around before colliding in a blinding flash. When it cleared, the two Irkens and one human were stunned to find themselves looking up at a ten-foot-tall purple mecha suit, with Minimoose's face prominently displayed on its chest.

"NYAH!"

"Cool," Gaz said with a grin, quickly ascending the mecha to get into its cockpit and take the controls. The mecha then turned and, with a mighty smash, burst through the wall and flew off into the distance, explosions soon ringing out in that direction.

"…Did you know he could do that?" Tenn asked a few moments later when her mind rebooted itself.

"No, but if anyone asks, I'll lie and say I did," Zim said, too stunned to consider telling that lie now. Shaking it off, he and Tenn turned back to the console, watching as Gaz and Minimoose started unleashing havoc.

Now, they just had to wait for the right moment to strike…

XXXXXXX

Dib and GIR were running down a corridor of the prison complex, trying to escape from the pursuing Irken guards.

"Come back here with that SIR Unit, you large-headed kid!" one guard said.

"YEAH!" another guard bellowed angrily, "We wanna see what happens next! Will Shmoopsy finally return Floopsy's bloops?! WE MUST KNOW!"

As the human kept running for his life, GIR only kept giggling insanely, "I bloop you all!"

"Shut up! Shut up! Shut up!" Dib said, equal parts annoyed and terrified, "Quit distracting me! I gotta find Gaz and the ship so we can leave this place!"

Unfortunately for Dib, the Vortian prison was like a maze, and he kept getting lost until he finally came to a dead end.

"A dead end!" Dib screamed in terror, "We're doomed!"

"Nuh-uh!" GIR said, "You're doomed, mah friends want to see TV with me!"

"There they are!" a guard said, pointing at the duo.

"Well, you had a horrible life," GIR said obliviously happy to the human, "YAY!"

"No! Not 'Yay'!" Dib snapped, "I'm only twelve!"

"I said horrible, not long," GIR said in duty mode, before turning back to normal, "I want a moon taquito! Because my master said I can't have a moose taco!"

"Oh please sweet merciful Bigfoot, don't let this stupidity be the last conversation I ever have," Dib moaned as the guards closed in on them.

"Okay, alien, come along quietly to a cell and we won't hurt you too badly," the lead guard said firmly, "And if you do resist, don't do it too much, because the longer this takes, the longer we're kept from watching that incredible show."

Dib opened his mouth, not sure if he was going to plead or scream defiantly or come up with some quick lie, but before he could say anything, the hallway was suddenly filled with a blinding flash of light. To everyone's surprise, this was because a miniature wormhole had appeared out of nowhere in the middle of the hallway between Dib and the guards, out of which stepped an utterly shocking sight.

"Oh, hi Dib!" Keef said cheerfully from where he was seated atop the back of the Moose, which looked utterly browbeaten yet somehow also still just as deadpan as it had before.

"Wha, how did, what the…?" Dib sputtered, unable to wrap his brain around what he was seeing.

"Hey, have you seen Tenn around here anywhere?" Keef asked, oblivious as always to the psychological trauma he was creating just by existing. Hearing this, however, not only snapped Dib out of his mental trainwreck but also gave him the spark of inspiration he desperately needed.

"Yeah, I think she went that way!" he said, pointing in the direction of the guards.

"Thanks! Yah, Sir Lovemore!" Keef declared, evidently talking to the Moose, who responded to the command by rearing back and then charging forward. The Irkens didn't have a chance to react before it slammed into them, flattening most of them and sending the rest flying to smack against the walls, all of them swiftly rendered unconscious. Not that Keef seemed to notice this, as his apparently now fully-trained steed ran down the hallway – with, Dib belatedly noticed, GIR happily hanging onto its tail as it dragged him along.

"Woohoo!" the insane robot cheered as the Moose turned, and it and its riders disappeared around a corner.

"…Well, no idea how that happened, but I'm not going to look a gift moose in the mouth. Er, gift horse, I mean," Dib said, shaking his head before exiting the dead end corridor and running in the opposite direction of where the Moose had gone, hoping that would lead him to Gaz, or at least something that would help him find her.

He didn't know how long he ran through the seemingly-endless corridors, but however long it was, he didn't seem to be getting anywhere. And just when he was starting to think he might want to stop and actually come up with an actual plan more complex than "run around at random", he froze as he heard the sound of pounding boots heading in his direction. Looking around frantically, he spotted a nearby door and opened it, quickly ducking inside and shutting the door behind him, holding his breath and not moving a muscle as he listened to the sounds of the boots and several raised voices pass by, and then fade into the distance as the presumed guards moved on down the corridor.

Breathing a sigh of relief, Dib looked around to actually look at the room he'd taken refuge in, seeing it to be about the width of his house and empty, except for a row of dark alcoves or cells running alongside the opposite wall. Each had an odd smiling face symbol built into the top of each of the archways acting as the openings of the cells, though one of them was noticeably lit up while the others weren't. Dib frowned in confusion at this, and then jumped as a voice suddenly called out from within that particular cell.

"Hello… whatever you are," the mysterious voice said from the shadows, the speaker mostly hidden from sight, just being a silhouette with visible eyes, which was enough for Dib to recognize them as a Vortian.

Dib raised an eyebrow and got closer to the cell. He didn't know what to make of it, as he saw a doorway but without an actual door or bars. He put his hand into the empty space and yelped as the invisible forcefield in the doorway electrocuted him.

"OW!" Dib bellowed in pain, "¡No chingues eso dolio!"

"Yeah, I probably should have told you about the forcefield in my cell," the mysterious prisoner said, "An extra precaution those Irken bastards put for yours truly."

"What did you do?" Dib asked with mild curiosity as he kept shaking his hand in pain, "I've been running around trying to find my sister, and I heard some Irken guards coming, so I hid here. I didn't expect to find someone else in here."

"Do you always explain everything like that?" the prisoner asked with a yawn, "Because I gotta tell you, it's kinda boring."

"Yeah, I know," Dib sighed, "I gotta stop doing that… anyway, who are you? Why are you here? Did you happen to see an Irken by the name of Zim by any chance?"

The Vortian's eyes widened, and then narrowed with rage.

"How do you know that jerk?"

"I know Zim because unfortunately that idiot was assigned to conquer my planet," Dib explained, "He also kidnapped my sister and I got dragged after him when I tried to rescue her; he said something about trying to steal snacks from that Larb guy."

"Invader Larb," the Vortian said with contempt, "He's the Irken Invader who conquered my world, and he did it without even trying!"

"Yeah, I heard that part," Dib replied, "Zim and Tenn are trying to get some petty revenge on him because they don't think he deserves all the praise from the Tallest or whatever."

"Invader Tenn is also here?!"

"Yeah… I just said that," the human boy nodded, "They're running around the prison looking for those snacks, and honestly I don't care if they get caught and killed, but I do care about my sister, so by any chance did she pass by here?"

"Nope," the Vortian said, "You're the first person other than the guards that I've seen since I was captured and incarcerated here… speaking of which, can you do me a favor and turn off the Vortian 'Splodey System? It's that smiling face on top of my cell. It has my bio-signature encoded, and as long as it's activated, I can't escape."

Dib looked up at the Vortian technology. He rubbed his chin before he got to work.

"Gimme a sec," he said, "I'll see what I can do."

Dib reached into his trench coat and pulled out his laptop. He set it on the floor and opened it, then pulled out a pair of headphones and put them on. He then started typing very fast, as an image of a probe appeared, along with the words "probe enabled".

"Hacking probe enabled," the computer grumbled, "I hate you so much."

A tiny mechanical arm extended from the back of the laptop. It launched out a small probe that soared through the air and latched onto the Vortian 'Splodey System. The prisoner was unimpressed at this, since the equipment his would-be rescuer was using seemed really low tech. He did, however, raise an eyebrow in curiosity.

"That's a first," he said, "I've never seen a computer being capable of spewing hatred before."

"That's Gaz's doing," Dib sighed, "She kinda hacked my computer and gave it a personality adjustment just to mess with me. Says it's because I ate the last slice of pizza."

"What's pizza?" the prisoner asked, confused.

"A type of Earth food."

"What's Earth?"

"My homeworld," Dib replied, "Now, just be quiet for a minute, I have a bit of experience with Irken tech, and if I'm right, the Irkens still use the same operating system as me."

A fanfare played on the laptop, and the one-eyed Invader symbol appeared.

"I'm in!" Dib exclaimed.

The computer screen showed a Vortian within the forcefield that presumably represented the 'Splodey System. Suddenly the graphic representation of the forcefield disappeared, and at the same time, the smiling face of the 'Splodey System over the cell slowly turned off.

Dib looked up as the Vortian prisoner came out of the shadows, and finally for the very first time since his imprisonment he was able to walk past the doorway without fear of being electrocuted or worse, have the feeling of exploding.

"I owe you big time, kid," he said gratefully.

"Think nothing of it… uh…"

"Oh, right, how disrespectful of me. I am Lard Nar… Captain Lard Nar of the Resisty!" the Vortian declared proudly.

"…Resisty?" Dib echoed with a raised eyebrow, which caused Lard Nar to deflate.

"Yeah, I know it's a stupid name for a resistance group, but it was all we could come up with at the time, and it stuck before we could come up with something better," he sighed, before shaking it off and offering Dib his hand, "Anyway, like I said, I owe you, so how about I help you find your sister and those Irken jerks? And maybe stage a breakout while we're at it to stick it to the Empire?"

Despite the serious of the situation, Dib couldn't help but grin, suddenly feeling like he'd found a kindred spirit.

"Let's do it," he said, taking Lard Nar's hand.

XXXXXXX

In the control room, Zim and Tenn sat by the controls, watching on several of the many security monitors as Gaz continued to rampage in her Minimoose-mecha. Many buildings were on fire, other mechas used by the defenders had been reduced to scrap, and there were piles of injured Irken soldiers everywhere.

"I hate to admit it, but bringing her along was actually a pretty good idea," Tenn reluctantly stated, "I mean, I knew she was pretty strong and skilled, but I didn't know she was this good."

"Zim is convinced that her parental unit actually genetically engineered her as some kind of super soldier," Zim replied casually, even as he watched Gaz spin Minimoose's enlarged body around in order to lay down 360 degree fire in response to an attempt to bum rush her, "See? The speed she was moving at for that move should have liquified her pitiful human bones."

Tenn hummed thoughtfully, but before she could comment, the door to the room was suddenly slammed open. Both exiled Invaders jumped to their feet, expecting to find themselves facing security guards, and instead stared wide-eyed as Dib and Lard Nar burst in from the outside corridor.

"Quick, from here we can… er," Lard Nar started to say, only to trail off as he took in the sight of the two stunned Irkens staring back at him.

"Zim!" Dib exclaimed instinctively, which snapped the Irkens out of their shock to glare back at him.

"Oh, Dib-Stink, you're still alive? That's disappointing," Zim said, earning a glare in return from Dib.

"Yes I am, now where's Gaz? What vile things are you forcing her to do?" he demanded.

"Does it look like she's doing anything against her will?" Tenn asked flatly, gesturing to the monitors displaying Gaz's ongoing rampage. Seeing this, Dib could only blink and stare at the unfolding carnage, relief at seeing Gaz was okay competing with a mixture of awe and horror. Lard Nar, meanwhile, was mostly only feeling the latter as he watched his planet get wrecked. Again.

"While I enjoy watching those imperialistic kregoni get knocked around as much as anyone, does she have to be blowing up so much of my homeworld to do it?!" he yelled, reminding the Invaders that he was there too.

"Who are you?" Zim asked, which made Lard Nar blink at him in disbelief.

"Wha- you don't remember me?" he demanded incredulously, "It's me, Lard Nar. We worked together on Research Station 9 for over 20 years!"

"Lard Nar? Oh yeah, weren't you the guy who designed the toilets on the Massive?"

"I did more than that, you idiot! I was your damn supervisor!" Lard Nar yelled. Tenn's eyes narrowed in thought as she heard that.

"Hang on, if you were his supervisor, why didn't you stop him from making that blob monster that ate Tallest Miyuki?" she demanded of the Vortian, whose eyes widened in shock.

"Wait, that was you?!" Lard Nar exclaimed, glaring at Zim, "My people got blamed for that! It was the excuse that the current Tallest used to conquer us, and it was all because of you?!"

"Yes, yes, Zim has done many amazing things, thanks for noticing," Zim replied flippantly, which only made Lard Nar growl. However, before he could say or do anything else, a blaring alarm suddenly sounded, making everyone in the room flinch. The monitor screens all momentarily went to static, before switching over to a frantic-looking Invader Larb.

"Attention, all Irken forces of Vort garrison!" Larb shouted at the camera, "This is a Priority One alert! All units converge immediately on Sector 0-1! We have hostile aliens rampaging, they must be stopped immediately before they make me look bad! …Er, I mean, before they ruin imperial control of the planet!"

"…You know what, if this mess makes that jerk have some kind of breakdown, I'm starting to think it might be worth it," Lard Nar admitted.

"Not a fan?" Tenn asked dryly.

"Of course not!" Lard Nar snapped, missing the sarcasm completely, "That two-faced jerk came here pretending to be a friend and ally, and then stabbed us all in the back! I warned everyone that he couldn't be trusted, not with how bad relations with the Irkens had gotten, but did anyone listen to me? No! I was the only voice of reason on the whole damn planet, and they all just ignored me until it was too late!"

Dib, who was feeling an uncomfortable amount of similarity to Lard Nar's situation, and what he felt was a fairly reasonable concern that he might end up the same way, nonetheless managed to keep his focus enough to see that Zim and Tenn were caught up watching the Vortian rant. Deciding to take advantage of their distraction to more closely examine the room's various consoles, he grimaced at what he saw – a countless number of red icons representing Irken military units were converging on the flashing grid that was presumably where Gaz was currently located. He didn't care how tough she was, he didn't think even she could handle all that on her own; he needed to do something, but what?

"…And don't even get me started on how petty he was once I was caught and dragged back here!" Lard Nar continued to ramble, "Every morning, I'd get woken up by my cell playing a recording of him saying 'Guess who got caught? You did!' in the most annoying tone possible, over and over on loop! And the food-!"

"How long should we let him go on?" Tenn asked Zim, the pair still watching the Vortian rant.

"Zim is morbidly curious to see how long he can do this without needing to stop to breathe," Zim replied, "And unlike Dib's usual rants, this is almost entertaining… wait, the Dib! Where'd he go?!"

In response, another alarm blared out, snapping Lard Nar out of his ranting. He and the Irkens quickly returned their attention to the control consoles, where Dib was standing over one panel, his hand having apparently just slammed down on a large red button. One labeled "Security System Total Shutdown".

"…Why is there a button for that?!" Tenn screamed in disbelief.

"I know, right? This was almost too easy," Dib replied smugly, as the monitors now showed all the captive Vortians and other prisoners surging out of the prison complex as the 'Splodey Systems and other security measures that had been keeping them in their cells all deactivated. While many ran off to apparently either hide or escape, the majority grabbed whatever weapons they could and started attacking their former guards. And while normally the Irkens would have still had a large advantage just due to numbers, right now they were in total disarray – Gaz was still decimating anyone who came at her, GIR had somehow set up an outdoor theatre that a significant number of guards were now camped at in order to watch more Floopsy Bloops Shmoopsy while oblivious to the chaos around them, and the Moose was still rampaging with Keef still sitting cheerfully atop it and evidently still looking for Tenn.

"When did he even get here?! And why is the Moose obeying him?!" Zim demanded, glaring at the image of the redhaired menace.

"I don't know, and I don't want to know," Tenn growled, "We'll just avoid him until we can leave. Anyway, on the bright side, everyone is now thoroughly distracted, so we just need an opportunity to grab the snacks, and we should be able to get away clear."

As if on cue, yet another alarm went off.

"Now what?" Zim growled, only for his eyes to widen as one of the screens suddenly switched over to reveal a very familiar pair of obscenely tall Irkens.

"My Tallest?!" he exclaimed happily, only for Tenn to nudge him in the side.

"Don't get too excited, they can't see or hear us. I tapped into Larb's personal communications line as a precaution, we're just eavesdropping on his conversation," she explained, while the screen split to also show the harried Larb.

"My Tallest, I-" Larb started to say, only to be cut off.

"Larb, would you care to explain why we're getting reports of escaping prisoners and attacking aliens all causing chaos on what's supposed to be one of our most secure prison planets?" Tallest Red demanded.

"Yeah, what's the deal with that? Huh? Huh? Huh?" Tallest Purple added around the curly fries he was shoving into his mouth and chewing angrily as he spoke.

"My Tallest, it all happened so fast, we're still trying to figure out what's going on," Larb stuttered, wilting under his leaders' angry glares.

"Really? You're supposed to be our best Invader, and you so incapable of handling a series of minor annoyances that you let them spiral into this mess? And on my greatest holiday, no less?" Red growled, "I'm starting to think you're not actually that qualified."

"Yeah! And I'm thinking that you don't deserve those snacks!" Purple declared, "We should take them back!"

"You know what? That's a great point, Pur – we're taking those snacks back!"

"NOOO! Please, my Tallest, anything but that!" Larb pleaded, actually getting down on his knees.

"Forget it! Pack up all the snacks to get shipped back to us, then go focus on putting down this rebellion, and that's an order! Got it?" Red commanded.

"Yes, my Tallest," Larb whimpered pathetically, before the transmission cut out.

"Ha!" Zim laughed cruelly, "Seeing that over-hyped fool get knocked down is almost worth more than all the snacks! …We're still getting those, though."

"Obviously," Tenn said, nodding sagely, "Come on, let's go. If we hurry, we can grab the robots and be in prime position to intercept the snacks as they're being transported off-planet."

With that, the two Invaders quickly exited the room, leaving behind Dib and Lard Nar, who both seemed stunned by the sudden turn of events.

"…Did they just forget we were even here?" Dib asked after a few seconds of awkward silence.

"I think so. Not gonna lie, that's a little hurtful," Lard Nar muttered, before shaking it off, "Well, since there's already a breakout going on, I'm going to go round up as many of my people as possible and try to get them off planet while we can – we might have the momentum right now, but this is too disorganized to be able to properly liberate the planet. Best to make a break for it now and come back later when we're better prepared."

"Yeah, I'd help with that, but looking at all this, I'm thinking I might be a little out of my depth," Dib said reluctantly, awkwardly rubbing the back of his head, "It might be best if I just grab my sister and hightail it back to Earth."

"Probably for the best. Good luck, kid, hope we meet again," Lard Nar said, before bolting out the door. Dib watched them go, then turned back to the consoles. First he reconfirmed Gaz's location, and then located where Zim and Tenn were taking the Voot, before bolting out of the room in that direction. With any luck, he could steal the ship when Zim wasn't looking, pick up Gaz, and get out of here without getting dragged into anymore of this insanity.

But honestly, what were the chances of that?

XXXXXXX

At the landing pad atop of the administrative building that Larb used as a fortress, the Invader in question was sulking as he watched a squadron of guards who had just arrived begin the process of loading his hard-earned snacks into their ship.

"I barely had a chance to enjoy any of it," he muttered angrily, glaring at nothing, "Oh, when I get my hands on whoever is responsible for this, I swear to Irk-"

"Hi there!" GIR said, suddenly standing next to Larb, who jumped in surprise.

"What the-? Hey, you're the SIR that's been distracting everyone with that stupid show!" Larb exclaimed.

"Yep! And I gots a gift for you from mah master!" GIR replied cheerfully, pulling a large wrapped box out of his head and handing it to Larb. Blinking in confusion and not sure what else to do, Larb took it and opened it… and the brain-eating squid leapt out of the box and latched onto his face.

"GAH! Get it off, get it off, get it off!" he screamed, running around blindly as he tried to pry the squid off of himself, but unable to undo its vice grip on his face. The guards paused in their handling of the snacks to stare in confusion of the sight, watching as Larb flailed about before finally running right off the edge of the building, vanishing with a scream that trailed off as he dropped towards the ground below.

"…Should we go check to see if he's still alive?" one of the guards asked, after a few moments of them all staring at where Larb had fallen.

"Meh, he's an Invader, he'll be fine," the lieutenant in charge of the detachment said nonchalantly, "Our orders are to focus on getting these snacks back to the Tallest, nothing else is our concern."

"What about that thing?" one of the other guards said, gesturing towards GIR, who was giggling to himself at what had just happened.

"Eh, just shoot it before it interferes," the lieutenant said, barely paying attention as he returned his focus to the snacks. The guard he said this to shrugged in response and walked over to GIR, drawing a blaster and pointing it at his head-

SLAM

-Only for the Minimoose mecha to suddenly fly in out of nowhere to hit the landing pad hard enough to crack its surface, in the same motion lashing out with one arm to smack into the guard aiming at GIR. As he went flying over the rooftop edge with a scream, the other guards' heads snapped around to face the mecha, and were met with Gaz's smirking face looking down at them from the cockpit.

"Hi there," she said, opening fire before any of the guards could respond. Each shot was precise, hitting a guard head-on, and like their comrade and Larb sending them flying. Within just a few seconds, the rooftop was cleared of everyone except for Gaz and GIR, allowing the Voot to swoop in and land unopposed shortly thereafter.

"Tch, I don't know why you guys were so desperate to have me along to help. This was almost too easy," Gaz scoffed to Zim and Tenn as they exited the Voot and she hopped out of the mecha, allowing Minimoose to shift back down into his normal form.

"For the sake of avoiding rousing your ire, I'm going to avoid responding to that," Tenn stated, while next to her Zim was grinning with manic glee.

"Yes, once again, the brilliance of my amazing Zim brain triumphs! The snacks are ours! Mwhahahaha-Grk!" he cackled, before Tenn jabbed him in the neck to cut him off, "Gah! What was that for?"

"Don't waste time gloating about your 'genius'," she said firmly, "We should get moving before they get ahold of things enough to notice what we're doing."

"Meh, fine, whatever. Minimoose, do your thing!" Zim grumbled, before commanding his minion.

"Nyah!" Minimoose squeaked, body flaring with telekinetic energy that swept out, picking up every last box and bag of snacks, and started levitating them into the open back door of the Voot. And for good measure, he also grabbed GIR and tossed him in there as well, burying him under the snacks before he could wander off or do anything else that would hinder them.

Gaz watched all this with folded arms, already bored out her mind. She was just about to pull out her Game Slave to pass the time waiting for the Irkens to finish up, when Dib came bursting out of the nearby door, running up to her.

"Gaz! Are you alright?" he asked, panting for breath.

"The fact that you think that any of this nonsense was a legitimate threat to me is mildly insulting," Gaz scoffed. And before Dib could come up with a reply to that, the thrum of ship engines grabbed both of their attentions back to the Voot, seeing that it was preparing to takeoff. Not about to be left behind on this dumb planet, Gaz grabbed Dib by the collar and ran over to the ship, forcing the cockpit open and jumping in, landing behind the Irkens. They looked annoyed at the humans, but Gaz's death glare shut up any complaints, and they returned to piloting.

"You know, it just occurs to me that Keef is still somewhere on this planet," he said, "Shouldn't we pick him up so that he's not stranded here?"

"Why?" Gaz asked, looking at him in genuine confusion, "You know that he'll probably just somehow pop up back on Earth on his own without us having to do anything."

"…I hate that I can't think of a good reason to counteract that," Dib sighed, as the Voot breached Vort's atmosphere, watching as various other ships, hijacked by the escaping prisoners, likewise flew upwards and outwards, zipping off into hyperspace. The Earth-bound ship angled to do the same and head home… and suddenly found itself facing dozens of Armada vessels surrounding them on all sides, brimming with weapons that were charged and ready to fire.

"Attention, unidentified vessel!" a voice loudly broadcasted over the Voot's communications channels, "You are believed to be in possession of stolen snacks that are the rightful property of the Almighty Tallest! Surrender and prepare to be boarded for arrest and confiscation!"

"Are they seriously more concerned with this than all those escaping prisoners?" Dib asked in disbelief.

"Do not question the importance of snacks, Dib-Monkey!" Zim snapped, even as he and Tenn armed the Voot's weapons, "Now make yourself useful and prepare to fight!"

"This should be good," Gaz grinned, prepared for an epic space battle like no other-

[Scene Missing Due To Cosmic Burp. If You Want To View It, Please Speak To Recap Kid, If You Can Tolerate Their Voice.]

The heavily banged up Voot Cruiser limped through space towards Earth. It was on the verge of falling apart (more so than usual, anyway). The group were all laying in the Voot's cockpit, looking roughed up but unharmed, and more than anything just annoyed at having to share such a small space. Still, despite all that, they were mostly just relieved to have gotten back in one piece.

"WHOO! That was an incredibly spectacular and visually amazing space battle and escape!" Dib said ecstatically, "Man, do I feel bad for anyone who hears about it but ultimately missed out on seeing any of it."

"Pitiful human," Zim scoffed, "That was nothing in comparison to the conquest of Hobo 13!"

"I dunno about that," Tenn shrugged, "I mean, I've never been attacked and eaten by a Star Donkey that decided to randomly show up in the middle of a battle before, that's definitely new to me."

"I liked the part where Minimoose created a giant hammer out of dark matter and obliterated all those ships," Gaz said, mildly impressed, "That was horrible, but in a good way."

"Nyah!" Minimoose squeaked with modesty.

"Bah!" Zim sneered, "That was nothing in comparison to what I did!"

"You blew up one of Vort's moons, Zim!" Tenn snapped in annoyance, "You caused the destruction of nearly half the planet with the pieces that fell into the atmosphere!"

"So?" Zim asked indifferently, "They still have two other moons, and in any case, it's not our problem. The important thing is that after all this, ZIM HAS THE SNACKS! MWUHAHAHAHAHA!"

Thankfully for everyone's hearing, they didn't have to be subjected to Zim's maniacal laughter for too long, as they landed outside his base soon after. Everyone quickly scrambled out of the cockpit, glad to have space to stretch out, while Minimoose floated out after them. Seeing him start to float towards Zim's house, Gaz pointedly cleared her throat to catch the moose's attention.

"Hey, you better not be thinking you're going to be able to weasel out of our deal after I held up my end," she growled, causing Minimoose's eyes to widen slightly as he floated slightly away from her in mild fear.

"Nyah!"

"Good," she said, leaning back and crossing her arms, "Now then, when can I expect you to get me that game?"

"Nyah!"

"That long?" she demanded.

"Nyah!"

"Hmm, I don't know what kind of 'contacts' you'd have or why it would take them so long, but fine, whatever," she grumbled, turning and walking away, heading down the street towards her home, somewhat satisfied with things. Taking this as a sign that he was off the hook, Minimoose quickly floated into the house.

Tenn, meanwhile, headed towards her own house to grab something to cart the snacks inside with, only to jump in surprise at the sight of Keef on her lawn, sitting astride the extradimensional moose like it was a gallant stallion, and holding a bouquet of roses.

"Welcome back! Did you have nice trip?" he asked casually, as if he had not just somehow crossed parsecs of space unaided. Tenn stared blankly at him for a moment, then heaved a deep sigh of annoyance.

"I don't have the energy left today to deal with this," she muttered, pulling a remote out of her PAK and pressing it. In response, a giant tube suddenly burst out of the roof of her house and vacuumed Keef and the moose up, before reangling to aim at the horizon and shooting them out, leaving them to vanish into the distance.

Satisfied that the redhaired nuisance was gone for now, Tenn resumed her initial course of action, heading inside and rummaging around until she found a hover-cart. Reemerging from the house with it, she saw that Dib was talking angrily to himself as he apparently realized he hadn't taken any pictures of his incredible space voyage. Zim, meanwhile, was still laughing and gloating to no one in particular about how he'd "singlehandedly" managed to acquire all the snacks. Taking this all in, Tenn shook her head and walked over to the back of the Voot to start unloading the snacks, so she'd have an excuse to not be involved in the inevitable next round of these two morons' shouting match. However, just as Zim seemed to remember that Dib was present and turned to say something derogatory, Tenn shrieked; Zim and Dib's gazes instinctively snapped over to find her staring into the rear of the Voot in shock, and they ran over to see what was happening, only to stop short and look on in disgust at what they saw.

Tenn looked as she was going to puke, trying to hold it in, but couldn't because the sight in front of her was just too disgusting, in her opinion. She grabbed a random bucket that was conveniently nearby and threw up extensively. Zim and Dib made faces at what they had just witnessed; ironically, they were more grossed out by Tenn throwing up than the morbidly obese monstrosity in front of them all.

GIR had somehow managed to eat a great deal of the snacks they had stolen from the Tallest when they weren't looking. Admittedly, they had a good reason for being distracted at the time, as it had indeed been an epic space battle, and they didn't know if they would have survived it, but thankfully the hyperspace drive had started working again and saved their lives at the best possible time (and destroyed a few Irken vessels since GIR managed to somehow transfer his farts into the pursuing ships, unintentionally killing a few Irkens who couldn't breathe and passed out from the smell and died).

"WHAT THE HELL IS THAT?!" Tenn bellowed in a mixture of horror and disgust.

GIR had become so huge that he couldn't get out of the Voot's back door; it was a miracle that the outdated Irken ship hadn't collapsed under his weight. As they watched, GIR ate a snack that had been lodged underneath his armpit and burped happily, not seeming to care that he had become morbidly obese from eating over 80% of their loot.

"Tastes like me!" GIR squealed happily.

"GIR!" Zim yelled out, annoyed, "Do you realize what you have done?! After everything we had to go through to get those snacks, you just went ahead and ATE them without my amazing permission! What do you have to say for yourself?!"

"What's for dessert?"

Zim, Tenn, and Dib all groaned in disgust.

"Okay, I'm out of here," Dib said, "After this insanity, I need a bath and to figure out where my life took a wrong turn."

"Yes, yes, your life sucks, Dib-Stink," Zim sneered, "What else is new?!"

Dib, however, was too tired to fight Zim, and simply gave the Irken the finger as he walked off down the street.

"I still don't know what that gesture means," Tenn commented.

GIR then began to gag, and Zim's eyes widened in horror.

"GIR! DON'T YOU DARE DO WHAT I THINK YOU'RE GOING TO DO! I AM YOUR MASTER AND I ORDER YOU TO OBEY ME! OBEY ME!"

The SIR Unit, of course, couldn't hold it in, and he loomed over the two Irkens as he hunched over.

"RUN AWAY!" Zim yelled as he jumped out of the way.

"Zim, what are you…?" Tenn asked, frustrated. Then she looked up at the sick robot.

"NOOOOO!"

"YAY!" GIR cheered as he began throwing up.

"WORST FROSTING THE 13TH EVER!"

XxxxxxxxxxxxxxX

A/N: And done. Hope you all liked this extra-long chapter, and props again to Invader Johnny for all his contributions to it.

Speaking of which, one I want to address in particular – when the Tak Ship says that Tenn abandoned her mission, that's not what really happened, that's just what the Tallest told everyone happened. I'll explore this in more detail in a later chapter.

Anyway, until next time, thanks for reading. Please review!