I do not own Witcher or any of the characters.
Fantasy Land
Eldin hummed thoughtfully as he looked around. They were in a forest filled with enormous, ancient trees, small specks of glowing light like fireflies, giant mushrooms bigger than they were, no palace or playroom, and no Regis. Only Eldin, Aralyn, and Renfri. Off to the side, there was a shimmering wall of light, likely where the dimension they were in ended.
"This is an amazing level of magic," Aralyn commented as they followed the path they'd appeared on.
"It's incredible," Renfri agreed.
"It's also real," Eldin mused, running his hand along a fern. "Well, hello, there." He stopped to read a road sign that had been hand-carved from a piece of bark and tied to a stick. "Welcome to the Land of a Thousand Fables. Set out on a journey of wonder. Enjoy yourselves. Uncle Artorius. Warning, spells will remain stable until June twelve-fifty-two."
"Fourteen years ago?" Aralyn grimaced. "This should be interesting."
"Agreed," Eldin nodded. "Come on."
They continued along the path, finding several branches, but they all rejoined anyway just before a bridge over a shallow river. The path continued on the far end of the short bridge, so Eldin and the others did the same. Finally, they stopped as they heard a pair of voices.
"Bloody hell! Let him out!"
"He gobbled up my gingerbread. Now it's my turn to gobble him!"
As the second voice cackled, Eldin and the others headed toward them, finally finding Syanna struggling to open a kiln. As she did, a truly ugly witch stepped up beside her, the witch having rotting, yellow flesh, a nose hanging past her chin, a tattered, filthy dress, and a cauldron with some kind of glowing, yellow potion in her left arm.
"Hands off my hearth, dearie," the witch crooned. "You wouldn't want me to get cross."
"Then you open it!" Syanna snapped.
Just then, the witch and Syanna noticed Eldin in the others, Eldin waving nonchalantly at Syanna.
"Now who's this?" the witch asked. "Lost travelers? You're not supposed to be here, sweetie." She began to creep closer. "Oh, but my, you do look tasty. All three of you. Don't worry. A bit of butter...a bit of spice...and you'll make a tasty morsel."
As she spoke, she released the cauldron, which floated at her side, then snapped her fingers twice. A moment later, her broomstick flew into her hand, Eldin and the others drawing their swords as she mounted the broom and floated into the air.
"Just as soon as I catch you!" the witch cackled.
Waves of blue magic appeared in the air around her, flooding toward her and forming a bubble around her just as she splattered some of her potion on the ground. Instantly, several glowing red Archespores burst up from the ground.
"Come, now!" Syanna called out over the witch's cackle. "You cannot possibly fear a few magical plants!"
Eldin groaned in annoyance and lunged, ducking under a barrage of poisonous pollen goo, then stood, slashing hard and severing the Archespores, killing them. Eldin spun, hurling a small bomb up into the air, and it exploded against the bubble, but it did nothing, even though it scattered Dimiterium powder into the air around her.
"That doesn't work here!" the witch cackled, then scooped out a glob of potion and hurled it at him, her bubble vanishing just long enough for the glob to pass before reforming.
As Eldin dove aside, the witch cackled again, streaking over them and pouring a trail of the foul-smelling potion along the ground, everyone having to scatter out of the way, the bubble once-again reforming after the attack ended.
"Ugh!" Syanna grimaced. "That soup smells more vile than a rotting carcass! Careful she doesn't douse you!"
"No shit!" Eldin called back. "Let us do our job, then we can talk!"
Then, he dove out of the way of another glob of potion, then another. Finally, as the witch made a pass toward Aralyn, Eldin fired off a blast of Ard, launching her from her broom. As the witch crashed to the ground, rolling along, Eldin stomped on the broom, crushing it. The witch shrieked in rage, but as she reached for her cauldron, Renfri blasted it with Aard, sending it bouncing away. The witch spun toward Renfri, but just as she did, Aralyn stepped up in front of her, her sword sweeping up and decapitating the witch.
"Felicitations, Witchers," Syanna commended. "It seems you've won. I was expecting that to take longer."
"We've faced worse," Eldin said dryly. "So, care to explain who's in the kiln?"
"I'll show you," Syanna said, kneeling beside the witch to search her dress. "Now, where did she put that key?"
"Listen, we..." Eldin trailed off, staring at a sword that looked to be a koviri cutlass with a green grip. "Where'd you come by a weapon?"
"It's Prince Charming's," Syanna explained. "He no longer needs it."
"Prince Charming's dead?" Aralyn asked.
"Here it is!" Syanna said, taking the key and running to the kiln and opening the door.
A young boy wearing a green tunic, hat, and pants stumbled out, coughing. "Thank you! She'd have backed me if you hadn't...Syanna? Is that you?"
"It's been years, Jack," Syanna smiled.
"H-Have you come to play?" Jack asked.
"No," Syanna said. "I just need your beans. So you can breathe easy."
"Is it a bad thing for you to be here to play?" Eldin asked.
"Jack knows what I mean," Syanna said cryptically. "So he'll tell me where the beans are as fast as he can, isn't that right?"
"Syanna, I...I'm sorry, but...but I haven't got them!" Jack stammered out, terrified.
"Oh," Syanna said as she stood, "something tells me you're lying. Perhaps you wish to play the old games after all, hm? 'This little piggy went to market, this little piggy went home,' for instance?"
"What'd you do, cut off his fingers?" Eldin asked.
"I'm telling the truth!" Jack pleaded. "Anarietta...She ordered them buried all over so you wouldn't be able to leave!"
Eldin sighed. "A scavenger hunt, then."
"Where?" Syanna asked.
"I...I d-don't know!" Jack stammered. "But...Joss! The boy with the thing for wolves, he should know! He sticks his nose in everyone's affairs!"
"He had better know," Syanna warned. "Because if not, I'll find you, and we'll have ourselves a little talk, understand? Now shoo!"
As Jack ran away in terror, Syanna turned to them at last.
"All right," she sighed. "So why is it you're here?"
"Dettlaff is trying to force Anna Henrietta's hand," Renfri explained. "He's set a horde of vampires on Beauclair just like he threatened to, and the only way to stop it is to bring you to him."
"You exposed me," Syanna scoffed. "I landed in prison because of you. Now you come to beg my help, I daresay. My, life is full of surprises, isn't it? Normally, I'd tell you to sod off, but...from what you say, folk are dying who have nothing to do with this. Not part of the plan. Dettlaff was only to kill those who deserved it. No one else. Fine, Witcher. I accept your offer. Consider us allies." She extended her hand to Eldin. "Shake on it."
Eldin gripped her hand. "We won't let Dettlaff hurt you. We only need him to show himself so that we can negotiate, or kill him."
"Good to know," Syanna nodded.
"Since you brought it up, those knights Dettlaff killed," Eldin said. "They abused you, didn't you?"
Syanna nodded. "It's not a memory I like revisiting, but I suppose you deserve to know. They were ordered to escort me from the duchy, and did so without a word in my defense."
"But I'd wager no orders were given to abuse you," Aralyn surmised.
"That's right," Syanna nodded. "Crespi had no orders to beat me unconscious with a horsewhip after my first attempt at escape. And du Lac had no instructions to deny me food and abuse me. I learned something then. Knights are not so chivalrous when no one's watching."
"Sounds about right," Renfri nodded.
"Were you shocked when you realized it?" Syanna asked. "I'll bet you thought you had me pegged. Before bothering to hear my side Everyone does that."
"We did have you pegged," Eldin said, Syanna's eyes narrowing dangerously. "You're the victim of an accusation of a false curse who was abused and banished without any chance to defend herself. You were beaten and abused, and treated like a monster, so you decided to play the part."
"You talk like you understand how I feel," Syanna scoffed. "But pretty words will not make me believe you."
"We should understand how you feel," Renfri said. "After all, I was also born under a black sun."
"You...what!?" Syanna's eyes went wide and her mouth fell open in surprise.
Renfri nodded. "I was a princess, though an only child, and like you, I was accused of bearing the Curse of Black Sun. I was banished, but Stregobor, the mage who claimed me cursed, ordered the man escorting me to assassinate me. Instead, the man raped me. I used a pin to kill him, and Stregobor sent an assassin after me. He, too, decided to rape me instead of kill me. Eventually, I was found by a gang of bandits, but instead of rapiding and killing me, they fed me, clothed me, and took me in. I spent years of my life hunting stregobor and living as a bandit, like you. But that changed when I met Eldin and Aralyn.
"When they met me, I was on the edge of becoming the monster I was accused of being. I was planning to slaughter an entire town to get to Stregobor. They showed me a better way to live. They saved me from myself. And while they can't understand the Curse of Black Sun, exactly, they can understand how we feel. Eldin is universally treated as a monster for being a Witcher, and Aralyn was raped, murdered her rapists, and then was arrested and raped constantly for weeks as punishment, all leading toward an execution. Eldin saved her, and together, they saved me. And if you give us the chance, we can save you."
Syanna scoffed. "What makes you think I want saving?"
"Because I was you," Renfri answered. "Somewhere inside of you, there's a scared little girl who's alone and crying. She misses her sister, and her home, and she just wants to be loved. We can save her, can give her that, if you'll let us."
"How?" Syanna asked.
"Firstly, you need to not carry out your plan to kill Anna Henrietta," Eldin said, Syanna's eyes widening, then narrowing.
"I told you, he understands," Renfri said. "Anna Henrietta searched for you for years once she took over. But by then, you'd taken the name Rhenawedd and she couldn't find you. If you can believe that, you'll have your sister back. She still loves you, and she wants to be able to be with you again. And if you want, you could travel with us and we could show you how to let go of your hate and anger."
"What, by being another lover in your triangle?" Syanna scoffed.
"No," Eldin said. "Sex has nothing to do with it. We would show you what it's like to have friends. We'd show you what it's like to be depended on and trusted."
"And what if I decided I didn't trust you, and I tried to kill you?" Syanna asked.
"They'd forgive you, just like they forgave me," Renfri said.
"They what?" Syanna asked.
"It was early in our time together," Renfri said. "I tried to poison them, but Eldin simply ate the poisoned food, since he's a Witcher and could survive, even though it gave him diarrhea, and stopped Aralyn from eating it. Afterward, he warned me that if I tried to poison Aralyn again, they'd leave me behind. Then they acted like nothing had happened."
"Just like that?" Syanna asked. "You just forgave her trying to kill you?"
"She failed, and we both understood that it wasn't because she hated us personally," Aralyn explained. "She'd been through Hell and had been taught through her whole life not to trust people. Besides, I did worse than that to Eldin when he and I started traveling together."
"I still have the scars," Eldin smiled.
Syanna frowned deeply, then shook her head. "We need to get those beans. There's a more pressing situation to deal with, isn't there?"
"Good point," Eldin nodded. "But just think about what we said, alright? The offer stands."
Syanna nodded. "Then let's find Joss."
"'The boy with the thing for wolves,' was it?" Eldin asked. "The boy who cried wolf, right?"
"Very good," Syanna nodded.
"And the beans are for a beanstalk?" Renfri guessed.
"Right again," Syanna nodded, the four of them walking through the forest. "One red, one blue, one yellow. We must get all three, because it must transpire exactly as it did in the tale. The exit is in the giant's castle. There used to be a second exit, but Anarietta sealed it when she trapped me in here."
"So, where do we find Joss?" Eldin asked.
"Joss can usually be found wandering the glade at the foot of the mountain," Syanna answered. "It's some distance from here. So, what exactly is happening in the city?"
"Dettlaff brought an army," Eldin said. "Everything from Garkains to Bruxae. It's a massacre, which is why we need to hurry."
"You needn't worry," Syanna assured him. "Time flows differently in the Fablesphere. We can stay here a week, yet outside, mere minutes will have passed."
"Maybe when the spells were stable," Aralyn mused, "but now that the spells have lost stability, it may be closer to actual time, or it may have reversed."
"Sounds like you'd have spent a long time here if Anna Henrietta had her way," Eldin noted as they entered a cave.
"I already have," Syanna said, sounding less than pleased.
Just then, about a dozen shadowy silhouettes appeared around them.
"Watch out, Pixies!" Syanna warned.
One of the silhouettes leapt at Eldin, its shadowy hand growing very solid claws, and Eldin spun around it, slashing it across the back as it passed, the Pixie bursting into a cloud of smoke. Renfri and Aralyn both began to slaughter the Pixies just as easily while behind them, Syanna did the same, showing a surprising amount of skill with a blade, reminding Eldin ever more strongly of Renfri when they met her. Finally the Pixies were all gone, and Eldin sheathed his sword again.
"Not the friendliest Pixies we've met," Eldin noted.
"They were put here to protect the Fablesphere from intruders," Syanna explained. "Meaning you."
They left the cave onto the edge of the glade, spotting unicorns ahead of them, two pink, one white, and one jet black.
"Oh, unicorns!" Syanna gasped. "We must catch them. We won't have to walk everywhere then."
They all walked over, Renfri and Syanna both excitedly claiming the pink ones. Eldin mounted the black one while Aralyn swept herself up onto the white unicorn, and Syanna laughed.
"Exciting isn't it?" Syanna laughed. "Reminds me of my childhood!"
"Childhood, yes," Eldin nodded. "Exciting, not so much."
Syanna laughed, shaking her head. Eldin smiled slightly as he watched her enjoy riding the unicorn across the glade, challenging the other three to a race. She was pretty when she had a genuine smile, and as Eldin glanced at Aralyn and Renfri, he saw that Aralyn's smile matched his own while Renfri's was tinged with attraction and colored by her own memories of being saved by Eldin and Aralyn. Eldin could tell at a glance that the kinship Renfri felt with Syanna was leading toward a genuine emotional attraction, one stronger than what she felt toward Eldin and Aralyn. Renfri was falling in love with Syanna.
Just then, several wolves leapt out of the large ferns and bushes ahead of them.
"No wolves here!" a young red-haired boy standing on a stump called out to them. "None at all! This is grand! I'm all right! No danger at all!"
Syanna groaned. "That's him! Joss! Blast, they're going to rip him in six!"
Eldin rolled his eyes, leaning to the side and slashing a wolf as he passed it. One leapt at Aralyn and she leaned back, allowing it to pass over her and split itself in half the long way on her sword. Renfri guided her unicorn into rearing, and its hooves slammed down on one wolf as Renfri sliced another's head off. Syanna stabbed one in the heart, then withdrew her sword and swept it around, slashing another across the side of the face. Eldin then finished it by cleaving its head from its body.
"Now that that's over..." Eldin grumbled.
"No it's not!" Joss argued. "There's more! Another wolf! Behind you!"
No one turned around.
"The boy who cried wolf is lying," Eldin said flatly. "Shocking."
"He always lies," Syanna snorted. "Listen, you little chit, Jack said you know what's become of his three beans."
"I don't know anything!" Joss said. "Not one thing! And besides, watch out! Wolves!"
Renfri sighed. "Let's get this over with. Where would the red bean not be?"
"For certain, no one swallowed it," Joss answered. "Oh no, definitely not that!"
"Of course not," Syanna smiled, playing along. "But say someone didn't, who would it be that didn't...swallow it?"
"A human!" Joss said instantly. "The most humany human in the Land of a Thousand Fables!" He looked behind them, then yelled loud enough his voice echoed. "Everyone! Wolves! Run!"
"I bet you haven't heard what happened to the blue bean, either," Eldin said.
"I've heard it lies about somewhere," Joss said, "out in the open."
"Just like that?" Eldin asked. "Nobody's guarding it?"
"Nobody!" Joss affirmed. "Three times over! Help! Wolves!"
"You've definitely not heard what happened to the yellow bean," Aralyn said.
Joss hummed thoughtfully. "It's somewhere very, and I mean very, deep. So deep, in fact, it's completely underground!"
"And who has it?" Syanna asked.
"A bald farmhand, who in no way and not at all, awaits someone," Joss answered. "Not in the slightest!"
"Good folk!" Joss shouted. "Wooolv-"
"Say that word again and I'll chop you up!" Syanna snapped. "Feed you to the fishes! Understood?"
"And on that note, we're done here," Eldin said, walking away with the others. "That conversation was annoying. He's a pain in the neck."
"Is he?" Syanna asked. "You need merely remember he always lies. Or, more precisely, reverses the truth."
"So, reverse the hints, huh?" Renfri mused. "Well, somewhere deep with a bald farmhand would be somewhere high with a princess with a lot of hair." She turned to the glade, at the center of which was a tall tower surrounded by a lake, at the top of which was a specific princess with long, golden hair. "Longlocks."
"Definitely not swallowed by a 'humany human' would be definitely swallowed by something inhuman," Aralyn offered.
"The only fable of someone swallowing something was the Big Bad Wolf eating Little Red Riding Hood's grandmother," Renfri said.
"And for nothing times three guarding the last bean in the open," Eldin considered. "I can think of two option. The Three Bears in their house, or the Three Little Pigs."
"Then we have several leads," Syanna nodded. "Where should we start?"
"If Anna Henrietta wanted the beans protected, the three bears would be better than the three pigs, so let's start there," Eldin reasoned. "Let's leave the Big Bad Wolf and Longlocks' tower for later."
Syanna nodded, and they spurred their unicorns along the right side of the glade, finding a path to follow. After a few minutes, they slowed to a stop at a town blanketed by snow. Off to the side was a young girl that was apparently selling fisstech.
"What fable includes fisstech?" Eldin asked.
Syanna was frowning. "She should be selling flint."
The girl ran over to them, a tray bearing numerous kinds of drugs in front of her with a rope over her shoulders to help support its weight. "Care for a cigarillo? A bit of tobacco? A dab of fisstech?"
"What happened to the flint?" Eldin asked.
"No one bought it, so I branched out," the girl shrugged. "Now I deal is snuffs, puffs, and all sorts of fun things. What'll you have, sweeties?"
Eldin exchanged a slightly amused and moderately perplexed look with the others.
"Magic beans," Syanna said. "Any chance you've come by some?"
"If it's not the name of some kicker I already have, dearies, then no. But maybe you'd like some-"
"Hey!" Syanna snapped suddenly, staring at a ribbon tied around the girl's wrist. "Where'd you get that ribbon!? That's mine!"
"Is that so?" the girl asked. "Then why was it lying in the bushes? Finders keepers, sweetheart."
"Is it special?" Renfri asked.
"It was given to me by Artorius Vigo," Syanna said. "It was to protect me from evil. It clearly didn't work, gievn how I ended up."
"But it's importent to you." Renfri nodded. "Even if just as a memento of your childhood."
"The ribbon reminds me of the good old days," Syanna explained, "when I was someone else."
"How much for the ribbon?" Renfri asked. "I'm guessing, like any good drug dealer, the only thing you have for free is the first hit."
"To get them to come back for the second," the girl nodded. "Five hundred florens for the ribbon."
"You little-" Syanna began.
"Done," Renfri said, dropping a rather large sack of coins onto the girl's tray. "The ribbon."
The girl blink in surprise, then untied the ribbon, holding it out to Syanna. Syanna stared at Renfri in surprise, so Renfri sighed, taking the ribbon and tying it around Syanna's wrist.
"That was too much," Syanna said. "Why would you pay do much for a ribbon?"
"Because you wanted it," Renfri shrugged.
Syanna shook her head in bewilderment, staring at Renfri as Renfri spurred her unicorn away from the snow-covered town, the others following, Syanna bringing up the rear.
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