JENNIE

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I once read an article that said the average time spent on foreplay was fourteen minutes. Obviously in the beginning things usually went a little longer for a couple, but I'd never spent two hours fooling around with someone without getting to sex—even when foreplay was all that was going to happen.

But Lisa took her time, and I really, really liked that. After I went down on her, she repaid the favor by giving me two orgasms with her mouth. Then we talked while she caressed my body. I thought she needed some recovery time, but when I snuggled closer and felt her fully erect already, I found that was definitely not the case.

She studied my face as she touched my body and told me all the things she wanted to do with me—slide herself between my breasts and come all over my neck, take me from behind, blindfold me, tie me to the bed. I should've been satiated after two powerful orgasms, but the more she talked, the more I wanted her inside of me.

Lisa started at my ear and kissed her way down my body to my toes. Then she licked and sucked her way back up. I was frenzied by the time she finally began to kiss me again. It made me crazy that she didn't seem as desperate as I felt. So I made it my personal mission to make her feel the same way I did.

When she kissed my neck, I nudged her a little, encouraging her to roll onto her back, and I climbed onto her. I took her mouth in a kiss as I slid my hips down so my wet center lined up over her erection. Then I started to grind against her as the kiss heated. That did the trick. In one swift move, I was on my back, and Lisa was hovering over me again. Only this time, she looked a lot more impatient. The victorious smile I flashed was met with a growl.

"I was trying to go slow."

I cupped her cheek. "I don't want slow. I want hard. Now."

Lisa grumbled a few curses as she reached for the nightstand. She grabbed her wallet and ripped out a condom, tossing everything else to the floor. Then she sheathed herself in record time.

Reappearing over me, she looked deep into my eyes. "You are…" She shook her head. "…incredible."

I pulled her down so our lips met and spoke against them. "Every time I look at you, I feel equal parts excited and terrified. But right now, I just want the excitement."

Lisa never broke our gaze as she pushed inside of me.

"Fuck." She swallowed. "You're so wet."

She moved in and out slowly, stretching me a little at a time. Even though I was prepared for her, and I obviously knew how thick and long she was since I'd had her in my mouth, it had been a while since I was with someone, and my body needed some encouragement to accept her full girth. Her arms shook as she took her time, and when she was finally seated inside me, she groaned. The sound was so guttural and raw, it sent chills down my arms and legs.

She stilled and kissed me gently before she looked into my eyes and fucked me the way I needed it—hard, raw, rough, and real. Each thrust went deeper and harder until the only sounds in the room were my moans and the wet slapping of our bodies against each other.

I dug my hands into her hair and tugged, saying her name over and over. The pulsing wave began to roll through me, and Lisa's breaths became uneven. We were both losing control at the same time.

"Fuck. You feel…so fucking good. So fucking good." Lisa gritted her teeth.

"Don't stop. Yes. Just like…oh…oh…" My orgasm hit me like a punch, and whatever words I'd been trying to form were swept away, along with any fear I had.

Lisa closed her eyes. The muscle in her jaw flexed and the veins in her neck bulged. She sped up her pace and kept going while I rode the wave. As I pulsated all around her, she let out a roar. "Fuuuck!" Her hips bucked, and she planted herself deeply inside of me.

After a moment, she kissed my neck and continued to move in and out at a leisurely pace. Pushing the sweaty hair from my forehead, she smiled down at me. "I'm done for after tonight, sweetheart. Now that I know how good it feels inside you, I'm never going to not want to be here."

I smiled. "That's okay. I like you here."

She kissed my lips softly and nodded. "Yeah. I like you here, too."

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We overslept the next day. I guess technically we didn't, since oversleeping implies that we slept for a long period of time. But since we didn't fall asleep until the sun came up and woke up to the sound of my cell phone only two hours later, we really sort of underslept.

I cracked one eye open to slide my phone on. "Hello?"

"Why aren't you down here?"

Shit. Rosé. I pushed up on one elbow. "What time is it?"

"Twenty minutes after brunch started."

"Oh. Crap. I'm sorry. I guess I overslept."

"You overslept or someone kept you up all night?"

"Both."

Rosé squealed, and I had to pull the phone away from my ear. Lisa squinted her eyes open, so I covered the phone.

"It's Rosé. We're late for brunch."

"Tell her we're skipping and I'm going to eat you again instead."

Of course Rosé heard that even though I'd had the phone covered. She squealed again. "Get down here now. I want to hear all the details."

Lisa took the phone from my hand and looked at me as she spoke. "We need twenty minutes to shower." Her eyes dropped to my exposed breast. "Make that thirty."

I had no idea what Rosé said, but Lisa swiped the phone off and buried her head in my neck. "Morning."

I was positive I had the goofiest smile on my face, though I didn't care. "Good morning."

Her hand slipped between my legs, and she ran her fingers over my swollen flesh. "Sore?"

I was, but I downplayed it. "A little."

She caught my gaze. "You sure?"

I nodded.

Lisa plucked one nipple, and it stiffened to a peak. "Good," she said gruffly. "I want to fuck you from behind in the bathroom, with you bent over the sink and watching in the mirror."

My muscles ached, and between my legs was tender from how many times we went at it last night, yet thinking about Lisa standing behind me while I was bent over already had my body thrumming to life.

I bit my lip. "Then why are we still in bed?"

A few heartbeats later, Lisa lifted me from the bed and cradled me in her arms. I yelped in surprise, but truly I loved it. I loved the feeling of being in her arms, and the way she could toss me around like I weighed nothing.

She carried me into the bathroom with a condom between her teeth, and then we did exactly what she'd said she wanted to do. She fucked me from behind over the sink while I watched. It was fast and furious, but no less satisfying. We both came hard, and it was a perfect way to wake up. After, we got ready quickly and went downstairs to join the rest of the wedding party for brunch.

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Rosé's eyes lit up when she saw us. My hair was tied back in a wet ponytail and Lisa's was slicked back from the shower. She pointed to the empty seat next to her as we approached the table. "Get your butt over here."

I looked at Jae. "Your wife is very bossy."

He smiled and looked at Rosé with admiration. "My wife…I like the sound of that."

Lisa took the seat across from Jaehyun, and the two of them fell into easy conversation. The newlyweds were going to Kauai for their honeymoon, and apparently Lisa had been there before, so they spoke about what boat tour to take and some helicopter ride.

Rosé attempted to grill me on how things had gone with Lisa, but I would only say we had a good night together. Though the smile on my face and the flush still on my cheeks from an orgasm twenty minutes ago probably told her a lot more than what came out of my mouth anyway.

Overhearing Lisa and Jae talk about where Lisa had stayed in Kauai, Rosé interrupted, "Oh. I saw that place online. It looks gorgeous. But they were sold out. Apparently they lost more than half of the resort in a storm a few years back."

Lisa nodded. "Didn't know that."

"How long ago were you there?"

Lisa's eyes flickered to mine for a moment. "Eight years ago."

I felt a stab of jealousy, though I knew that was stupid. Lisa had probably gone to Kauai on her honeymoon. Her marriage was long over, and we'd just spent an amazing night together growing closer, yet I still felt jealous. I tamped down my silly emotions and tried not to let them spoil the euphoric feeling I'd come in with.

"So, Lisa…" Rosé pointed her fork at Lisa. "Now that I'm an old married woman, I think I should warn you that I've mapped out my friend's future. Jennie and I are going to be neighbors with white picket fences and little boys born within a week of each other named Hank and Luca."

I laughed. "Rosé decided this in fifth grade. We used to walk by these adorable matching houses on our way home from school every day. Two sisters owned them, and they sat on one porch every day on our way to school drinking coffee, and on the way home they were always seated on the other porch drinking iced tea. We used to wonder if the tea was spiked."

Rosé bumped her shoulder with mine. "Ours will definitely be spiked." She looked at Lisa. "So which name do you want? Hank or Luca?"

Obviously it was too soon to be talking about anything serious between Lisa and me, but the entire thing was said in good fun.

Only Lisa's answer was serious. "I don't want children."

All of our smiles and laughter disappeared.

"Really?" I said.

Lisa nodded.

A horrible feeling settled in the pit of my stomach. I knew it wasn't the time or the place for this discussion. Unfortunately, Rosé wasn't going to let go so easily. She waved at Lisa. "Lots of people say that—until they meet the right person. You'll change your mind."

Lisa's face remained stoic. She looked at me and then down at her breakfast.

There were a few minutes of awkward silence after that. Rosé knew I wanted children. And I didn't just want one; I wanted a few. I'd grown up an only child and always longed for sisters or brothers. Eventually Jae changed the subject back to sports, and he and Lisa returned to light conversation. Rosé and I exchanged a few glances, and though I joined in the discussion around the table, I couldn't really get past what I'd learned.

Lisa and I hadn't even been seeing each other long, so I didn't think it should bother me so much. But the bottom line was, I really liked Lisa. Most other ideals and values had a workaround for couples. If one wanted to live in the city and the other the country, you could compromise and have two homes or live on the outskirts of the city where it was a little more suburban. If a husband wanted a stay-at-home wife, and the wife wanted to work, they could compromise on a part-time job. But there wasn't any middle ground when it came to having a family—you either had one or you didn't.

I tried my best to put a smile on through the rest of brunch, but Lisa's comment was like a nagging, dull toothache. When it was time to say goodbye, Rosé and I hugged.

"Have a great time," I said. "Send pictures."

She smiled. "I will. And don't worry about what Lisa said. I'm sure she'll change her mind. People don't know what they want until you show it to them. Well, except a blowjob. They always want a blowjob."

I smiled back. "You're right." Though inside I wasn't so sure. Something about the way Lisa had said the words made her seem pretty sure.

Lisa and I had to go back to our room to get our luggage. I hadn't even realized how quiet I'd been on the elevator ride up or while I packed until she came up behind me in the bathroom. She rubbed my arms as I grabbed my toothbrush, and spoke to my reflection in the mirror. "I didn't mean to catch you off guard or upset you. I'm sorry."

I shook my head. "It's okay. There's nothing to be sorry about. Rosé put you in that position by talking about her life plans."

Lisa nodded, but our eyes stayed locked. I got the feeling she was waiting for me to say more. So I did.

"Do you…really not want children?"

She nodded.

"Are you sure?"

She frowned and nodded again.

"But you're so great with Leo."

Lisa guided me to turn around and tilted my chin up so our eyes met directly, rather than through the mirror. "I don't want children, Jennie."

"Is it because you were in foster care? Do you mean you don't want biological children because there are so many kids who need homes?"

She stared into my eyes. "No, I don't want children at all."

It felt like a hit to my gut. Because I somehow knew by the look in her eyes that her decision hadn't been made lightly. We'd had such a great night, and I'd never expected that a moment of teasing this morning at breakfast would bring such an immediate and sudden halt to the excitement of what was growing between us. It was shocking, really.

I looked down. "Okay."

"I'm sorry."

"No, it's fine. I guess it's better that we have this discussion now than down the road. It's just that…" I looked up and felt my eyes well. Which seemed ridiculous. This relationship was so new, yet it felt like I'd suffered a loss. "I really want a family someday. Two or three little ones close in age, maybe a golden retriever named Spuds—a real full house. Not tomorrow or anything. But when the time is right."

Lisa nodded. "Of course." She pushed a lock of my hair behind my ear. "And you deserve to have everything you want."

I needed some time to think about this. "We should probably get going. We're past the late checkout time they gave me."

We packed the rest of our stuff and headed to the car. Both of us were quiet as we got on the road. Lisa took my hand and weaved her fingers with mine before lifting it to kiss the top.

"I have to head to the office for a few hours," she said. "You want me to drop you off at home?"

"Yeah, please."

At my apartment, Lisa unloaded my suitcase and walked me to the door. "I'll call you later?"

I nodded. She gave me a soft kiss and waited until I got inside.

Leaning against the door, it felt like I'd been whiplashed. One minute, I was falling for a great lover, and we couldn't get enough of each other. The future was so bright. And the next, I needed some time alone to think, and I wondered if we had a future together at all.

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