Chapter Four: Meltdown

The day before the day of the interviews was supposed to be given over interview preparation.

But both of Six's mentors were tributes this year, Balbus had sent along a message saying he wasn't feeling well, and Cashmere had preemptively excused her tribute, so there was nothing expected of them all day.

I didn't think we'd get another day like this, like the ones we'd get every year once Six's tributes were gone and when neither of us were wanted anywhere.

They spent most of the morning in bed, ordering food to the room and not talking much. Around noon Lee couldn't stand laying down anymore and got up despite Helvius's noisy protests. The One followed him into the shower regardless.

After that, Helvius suggested the roof. "Cashmere said she would sneak up there when she wasn't busy during the lead-up to and after my Games. Mostly when she couldn't sleep. Too much sulking downstairs."

"Has Gloss ever forgiven her for mentoring you?"

"No. Her attachment to me the one thing about her he'll never be okay with."

The back stairway up to Training Center roof led them out into the middle of a rooftop garden full of flowers and wind chimes. Kori Aoki was laying down on a bench in the middle of it. "Hi," she said dully as they approached, not moving beyond a turn of the head to see who they were.

"Hey," Lee replied. "Sorry if we're bothering you."

"You're not. I'm heading back down soon anyway." She rolled her head back to look up at the potted tree branches and clear sky beyond. "Katniss is up here somewhere, too. Just so you know."

Lee murmured an acknowledgment and pulled Helvius out of the garden, onto the larger, wide open part of the roof. Just to be sure we're not actually bothering her.

The view of the city was magnificent, too much so in a way. The noise coming from the streets, though muted, sounded cacophonous. As they approached the railing, Lee felt as if he was floating, above the Training Center, above the Capitol, up into the sky until everything was a rainbow blur. He couldn't feel whether his hands were touching the railing, or his feet the rooftop. The colors he thought he was seeing blurred together until they were meaningless.

It seemed like an eternity later when he felt a hand on his shoulder, shaking him lightly, heard a voice drifting through the fog. "Lee! Lee!"

He drifted back to reality as Helvius said, "Please don't fall off the roof or something."

"There's a force field. He couldn't fall if he tried."

I guess Katniss has made her appearance.

Lee blinked the last of the mist away and turned to Helvius. Katniss was leaning against the railing a few feet away. "Sorry. Was I gone long?"

"Couple minutes, maybe? Didn't notice at first. I was trying to find the building painted with the worst color combination."

"Is he okay?" Katniss said, giving a curt nod in Lee's direction, her tone something between demanding and plain awkward.

She sounds like that almost every time I hear her speak, though. "I'm fine."

"Oh. Good." She wrinkled her nose as Haymitch's voice, calling her name, rang out from the nearby dome-shaped structure where the stairs to the twelfth floor must be. "Ugh. What does he want? Thought he was going to sleep all day..." She stalked off without so much as a goodbye.

"She's weird," Helvius proclaimed.

"So says you."

"Whatever. I'm getting hungry again."

They walked a lap around the roof before heading downstairs again in search of food for Helvius. Kori was still laying on the bench; she didn't say anything as they walked by.

After ordering and eating far to much of whatever they wanted, they ended up taking a late afternoon nap.

When he woke up, seeing that the sun was setting, Lee tracked down Axela to make sure she at the very least ate dinner that day. He found her in not-great shape, coming down off a high, having obtained some extra-strong morphling from whoever her in-Capitol supplier was. Someone I never want to know the name of.

He got her to take a shower and eat a small meal, then tucked her into bed as darkness fell over the city. Back out in the living area, he found Helvius waiting for him. "How's Axela?"

"The way she always is."

"...I'm sorry."

"I'm used to it."

"Right." Pause. "Want to go back up and see the city at night?"

They didn't run into anyone on the roof this time.

There's so many lights, they make the stars disappear.

There were far fewer bright lights in Six, and even the smog would sometimes blow away in the winter winds.

Helvius's stylist showed up after breakfast the next morning to take him downstairs for interview prep.

"I'll see you later, Hal," Lee said when it looked like Helvius might refuse by punching the Capitolite.

Making a face, Helvius said, "Fine," and followed his stylist out, muttering as he went. Lee's own stylist, Basilia, and her prep team arrived shortly afterward. Unlike Balbus, who popped in a couple times to see how things were going, none of them were subdued. Quite the opposite. I don't think I've ever seen them so excited, and they've worked on our tributes for years.

They put him in a blue-gray suit with a black tie. Very formal. When he met up with Axela at the elevator, he found that her team had put her in a long-sleeved, high-necked, big-skirted gown made of black material covered in silver embroidery. They're covering up how thin she is. And all the track marks. They even put extensions in her hair to make it look thick.

"You look beautiful," he told her.

She was just sober enough to give him a faint grin. "Don't try to flatter me, handsome boy."

Behind the Training Center's stage, the same sort of chaos unfolded as it had before the parade. Most Victors kept escaping their stylists and escorts to mingle.

Helvius, wearing a gold-trimmed, vibrant green suit that complimented his eyes, made a beeline for Lee as soon as he saw him. "Oh, thank fuck you're here. If that bitch Alexandrine makes one more sly comment about me I'm going to take a page out of Aoki's book and break her nose." He made a vehement gesture towards One's current escort.

"Hal, promise me you won't do anything that stupid tonight." Never mind the Careers; he'd get murdered by Gamemaker. He might anyway.

"What else are they going to do to me?" Helvius groaned. "Fine, I won't injure anyone. Or insult anyone, either."

"If you're not cussing someone out, what's your angle?" I guess neither of us saw the point in discussing it...I've planned for this even less than for the scoring sessions.

For a moment, Helvius looked almost nervous. "You'll see."

Lee didn't get a chance to ask for more information before they were being lined up to walk onstage. Once they were out, greeted by thunderous applause, and seated, Caesar Flickerman, hair and eyelids dyed gold, got up onstage to perform almost the same routine he had for most of the past century.

Balbus said that Caesar will probably retire after this year, if the rumors are accurate. I wouldn't be surprised. He can't be under ninety, even if it's hard to tell with him.

Retiring after presiding over a Quarter Quell full of Victors as tributes would be a dramatic way to end a long career. At this point, it's probably that or eventually keel over in the middle of Games season like Plutarch Heavensbee. That's assuming if there's still…

He stopped that thought before it could lull him into too much thinking, or even worse, a mental fog. Pay attention. Now is not the time, not the place.

Shimmer Boleyn went first, barely covered in shiny purple material and jewels. The theme of her interview seemed to be one of tearful gratitude.

"I've made so many friends here, made so many wonderful memories...and now it all might end! I can only imagine you must feel the same way!"

"She has the crowd on her side," Lee said to Axela, not as quietly as he intended.

"Because they're idiots." He glanced to his left in time to see Johanna Mason wink at him.

Much of the crowd was in tears by the time Shimmer's three minutes ended. They quieted when Helvius stepped up.

"Helvius! Our fierce Victor of the Eighty-Third Hunger Games!" Caesar's smile was as bright as ever. "I see no tears here, ladies and gentlemen!"

Helvius smirked. "I'm not usually one to overwhelm people with sentimentality, Caesar."

"Not much has changed since we last had you on this stage, then!" That got a laugh. "Now, Helvius, you had rather a unique strategy for winning your Games, compared to others from your district. Will that be your strategy again?"

So he's ignoring the zero training score. Maybe all of the scores. Wise on his part.

"Yes and no, Caesar. Yes, because I know one way to fight and I'm going to utilize it." He hesitated.

What are you up to?

"But also no? Because?" Caesar prompted.

"Because...I'm not fighting for myself this time." Helvius's voice almost faltered. "These Games are different because...because I'm going in with someone I love this time."

Oh. So he's going...there.

Caesar sounded honestly surprised. "Oh, indeed? And who might that be?"

All the Victors know, after the last few days half of the tribute teams know, Snow has to know. The Capitol in general...not so much. We wanted it that way.

"Someone I've loved for years. Someone only get to see once a year. Someone I'll never get to be with because of the literal walls keeping us apart...and now all this."

Caesar didn't manage to gather himself for a response before Helvius marched up the stage and right toward Lee's seat. Lee had just succeeded in getting himself to stand when Helvius reached him, took his hands, and kissed him on the mouth in front of all Panem.

It didn't truly sink in for Lee until Helvius pulled away, only enough to whisper, "I love you."

He loves causing a scene, but I know him. This part is real. "I love you, too."

We've never actually said it, have we?

The crowd erupted, mostly in apparent confusion, and the buzzer went off far too early. Helvius just smiled, kissed Lee again, and went back to his seat.

Eve, with her assured manner and confident answers, seemed a bit overshadowed if the crowd's lack of enthusiasm was anything to go by. They did give a rousing cheer when her time was up, and while Conan took the stage, laughing uproariously with Caesar and almost salivating as he talked about the Games, things went almost back to normal.

Almost.

Quite a few Capitolites did look uncomfortable when the previous Quarter Quell's Victor shouted, "Maybe I'll bag a second Everdeen this time!"

Katniss's expression was like stone when Lee glanced at her, but her gray eyes were blazing.

Kori, wearing a black pantsuit sparkling with green and copper sequins, gave quiet, one-word answers to every question. Following her, Beetee openly questioned the legality of the Games and said that he wondered if the Quell twist had been properly examined by experts. Orla teared up as she talked about Finnick and Annie. Enough of the crowd were crying when Leviathan's turn came that his calm, ready answers got little response from them.

Tonight, the more dramatic, the better.

Sola Vesper chatted easily with Caesar, but didn't hide her sadness. Darien's interview got cut even shorter than Helvius's after he responded to Caesar's greeting with, "Why interview me? I'm the Victor who's getting executed here," and the crowd responded with loud shock and horror.

Saw that one coming.

Axela was still high, yet Lee could tell she was playing it up as Caesar struggled to keep her interview going. Then it was his turn.

"So, Lee…" Caesar began after a brief exchange of fancy hellos, "We simply must talk about a certain confession we just heard on this very stage."

Lee's short laugh was real. That's one way to say it. "Do we?"

Caesar feigned dramatic shock. "Why, of course we must!" Then, tone back to normal, he said, "Do please tell us how long this love story has been going on!"

I didn't expect him to put it like that. "We'd been friends for a long time, really. But it became...more during the Ninety-Third Games, I think."

Caesar kept the conversation light for the next minute or so, the highlight of which being Lee making a joke about Helvius eating like a growing teenager.

"Hey, darling, I'm thirty-four!" Helvius called from his seat.

"I stand by what I said!" Lee shot back. The crowd loved that.

As Lee's time ran out, Caesar had one last comment. "Well, it's been a long time since we've heard a confession of love on this stage. I'm only sorry that it has to end this way."

He looks like he means it. "Yeah, me too." The buzzer went off.

The crowd was making sounds of sympathy among the clapping while Lee heading back to his seat. It seems like we have some support because of this. Some positive attention, maybe, to help us at the start...

Then all of what Caesar had said sunk in and the terror hit.

The last person who confessed their love for another tribute during the interviews was Peeta Mellark.

Helvius might have made himself and Lee more interesting for sponsors. But he'd also imitated, intentionally or not, someone no one was supposed to.

The last pair of star-crossed lovers…

He got another look at Katniss's face as he sat down. Her expression was completely unreadable this time.

Things really started to go downhill after that.

Johanna followed Lee by swearing at everyone "who had anything to do with this shit!" Alder took a gentler route, asking if anything could be done about the Games because surely those who had written this Quarter Quell twist had not foreseen the love the Capitol had for the Victors.

The gasps from Johanna's interview rapidly turned into tears again.

Cerise Patel acted like the entire thing was a massive joke, although she threw in near the end, "Speaking of our unexpected love story, isn't it strange that no one volunteered for Glitz? You'd think there would be several of One's male Victors clamoring for the honor!" Tion's excitement about getting to be in another Hunger Games went almost unnoticed by the near-hysterical crowd.

They had time to calm down during Bonnie's interview, as she seemed very tired and wasn't even trying. They lost it again as Ira spoke about his family and how he was the youngest Victor in these Games without hiding his anger at all.

Ava Smith from Ten wore a short, simple white dress with a sheer black top layer, black tights, and flat white shoes. She murmured something to Caesar, who nodded and stepped back as she turned to face the crowd and melodious orchestral music began to play.

She danced to it for the entire three minutes, moving smoothly with far more flexibility than Lee would have expected from someone her age. She moved with the music as it rose from calm and gentle to swirling and intense, then back again. When the music ended, she gave a short bow to the cheering crowd and walked back to her seat without saying a word.

Her district partner, Colt, acted disinterested in his interview and gave curt answers when he had to speak. The crowd was just about settling again when Mika got up and started to talk about all the tributes she had mentored and lost, and about her grandmother.

Who apparently died in Ava's Games?

"I never knew her. She had my mother young, and was Reaped before Mom was a year old. My family never talked about her much, but when I became a Victor I looked her up, watched her Games, the Fifty-Second. She made it to the final eight before being killed by a bear mutt. She could've won, if it weren't for that. That year's Victor had the same strategy she did, more or less, and it worked. I could've had a grandmother. To be clear, I don't blame Ava for surviving when my grandmother didn't. They were around the same age, in the same position…Her name was Salvia Applegate. She deserved to watch her daughter grow up."

The hysterics had come back as Mika left the stage, only to be replaced by Chaff, who was so drunk that he threw up, almost getting it all over Caesar's sparkly suit. He had to be escorted back to his seat and the stage cleaned up before things could continue.

Then Katniss took the spotlight.

Even Caesar can't hide his nervousness now.

Her gown followed her usual theme. It was heavy-looking with long draping sleeves, black with red, orange, and yellow gemstones embroidered in interlocking flame patterns across it, growing thicker closer to the bodice.

When Caesar tentatively asked her how she felt about reentering an Arena, she said, "I'm upset. But at least I don't have to worry about Peeta this time."

She paused, then went on, "He so strong, so kind. He was good. Too good. Like Penny...Twelve's girl tribute last year...like Rue from my Games, like my sister Prim, like so many others...They were too young, too gentle. Too good for Panem."

Under the uproar from the crowd, she whispered to Caesar, who nodded and sounded relieved as he said, "Of course! Please do!"

Katniss smiled and stepped forward, then raised her arms and began to twirl.

That's what she did last time, isn't it?

Unlike last time, her dress burst into flames.

Jewels clattered onto the stage as smoke enveloped her. It soon cleared, leaving her standing in a completely black gown, except for some patches of white on the sleeves.

The crowd roared, Caesar stammered something about it having feathers like a bird, and Katniss's steady voice cut across it all. "It's a mockingjay."

There's really no turning back now.

And there was still one interview left to go.

Haymitch Abernathy sauntered onto the stage in a gray suit with flame accents.

Caesar, for once, looked tired as he soldiered on. "Haymitch Abernathy! You were the Victor of the Second Quarter Quell, and now, fifty years later, you will enter the one hundredth Arena! How do you feel going into this Games versus your first? Against Victors instead of twice as many tributes?"

"Well, I don't actually see much of a difference, Caesar." Haymitch grinned. "They'll still be one hundred percent as stupid as usual." Without another word, he turned and walked back to the others. The crowd proceeded to lose their minds again.

Lee had trouble focusing on anything as the anthem was cranked up over the sound of the Capitolites. Yet, when Johanna reached out her hand to him, he took it and grabbed Axela's on his other side. I think all of us Victors are holding hands, whether or not individuals want to. What a statement to end the night with.

There were a lot of guards backstage, almost forcing people to separate by district and get to their floors as soon as possible.

"Lee!" Helvius shouted across the room as the One's were guided into an elevator. "They're making me...The roof?"

Lee only managed to nod, then Helvius was gone. We'll meet on the roof. Talk about tonight. Say...I don't know what.

They might never see each other alive again. He'll go for a weapon during the Bloodbath and if he doesn't make it out in time...Maybe I can convince him to forget about it, to just run...We only need to stay alive for a few days…

He tried to say goodbye and good luck to Axela before she went to her room; it came out jumbled. The panic he rarely felt in more than brief flashes kept coming in waves.

To answer his mumbling, Axela just smiled and patted his cheek. "You're a good boy, Lee."

I might never see her alive again, either.

The door to the roof stairwell was locked when he tried to open it. I'm not going to be able to convince Hal of anything. Just one more night and...

He didn't sleep.