A / N Idk what to say. I just had fun writing this story over the summer, hope it puts a little smile on your face).

Many thanks to my wonderful beta SailorXStar!

Logan reread the page of the anatomy textbook for the third time. The clear letters were forming into clear words, and they were forming into clear sentences, but together it still didn't make sense. Not that the beach was the best atmosphere for reading, though, so Logan put the book aside and decided to see what the other guys were doing.

To the right, James was sunbathing on a chaise lounge. His refusal to wear sunscreen was obvious to anyone who walked a mile away, for that baboonish red-orange hue was something only a blind person would be lucky not to notice.

"James, I wouldn't recommend sunbathing for too long, your skin might get keratomas."

"This face is going to be on the cover of magazines soon and needs the sun." James made the signature gesture with his fingers, then looked at the mirror that had appeared out of nowhere with admiration. "Keep the medical stuff to yourself, I don't want to know about it."

"Okay, let's get factual. You look like a monkey's ass."

"What?" James shrieked hysterically."And you look like someone who doesn't know fashion!"

"Not very good at monkey fashion." Logan had just managed to get away from where the magazine had landed. He decided to leave his sunbathing friend alone before the risk of injury increased, if not to James, at least to himself.

Logan paced the shore to no avail and found Carlos's cell phone with the camera running. So Carlos himself must be nearby. But what he soon saw made him arch an unnatural eyebrow.

"What the hell?"

Floating on the surface of the water was an inflated sumo wrestler's suit, from which a small head with a helmet on it was visible.

"Don't block the camera, I'm setting a record!"

"For the stupidest time on vacation? You win!"

"Laugh it up," Carlos mumbled, and wanted to move closer to his companion, but the oversized suit apparently didn't share his desire. Carlos began to kick even more vigorously, but barely made it an inch.

Seeing the hurt look on Carlos' face, Logan only laughed even more. When it became even more pouty than the guy's suit, Logan straightened up and put on a serious face.

"I'm sorry, so what's the record?"

"World Records for people wearing inflatable sumo suits, I want one too!"

Logan googled the information with a dose of skepticism and actually found something.

"It was a race."

"But a swim is even better, no one had ever thought of that!"

"No wonder. There were also a lot of people there."

"Do you want to join in?"

"I refrain." Logan pictured himself in that suit and cringed. "At least take off your helmet, it'll be easier."

"Yeah!" Carlos exclaimed and reached for it, but his inflatable arms bent worse than Bitters when he cleaned their room. "Can you help me get it off?"

Logan didn't want to get his feet wet in the cool May water, but looking into Carlos's puppy dog eyes melted him. Even in his weird suit, he looked too cute.

"Okay."

"Bye, dear Helmet. Please be careful with him!" Carlos asked tragically, and Logan rolled his eyes. When he had accomplished this important task, he looked for Kendall and found him squatting on the shore.

"Uh, what are you doing?"

"Jo asked me to get her some pretty shells, she wants some beads." Kendall picked up another one, examined it glumly in the sunlight, and held it almost under Logan's nose. "Pretty enough?"

"I think there's a clam in there..."

Kendall recoiled from the shell.

"I don't get it, do I look like I know this stuff?" Resentfully, he moved a little farther away in a crab pose. "I should give Jo beads more often so she won't have such a need."

Logan thought about it. Compared to a boring textbook, a baboon tan, and a swim in an inflatable suit, shell collecting didn't seem like such a bad idea.

"I'll help."

Except for the fact that some deaf grandpa janitor took them for employees and held out a garbage bag, squinting when Kendall refused to throw the shells away and greedily pulled them to himself, things were going pretty well.

"Logan!"

"I'm not pulling your shells out of the trash again!"

"They had nothing to do with it, hurry over here!" Kendall sounded like an enthusiastic child.

Even from a distance, Logan could see him looking and clapping excitedly at something. Either Kendall had suddenly become an aesthete and was over excited about a pebble from the shore, or he'd overheated in the sun and gone crazy. As a future medic, Logan felt he should check.

"Oh, come on." Logan barely squeaked when he saw the object of his adoration. "A treasure map!"

In a burst of joy, Logan hugged Kendall tightly and they jumped up and down, hugging each other, shouting "We're rich!" The euphoria soon wore off, though, and the boys looked away in embarrassment.

"I just saw a hair on your back and I wanted to-" Logan started. "Yeah."

"Forget it?"

"Forget it."

Interrupting the awkward conversation, the boys rushed over to Carlos and James.

Carlos walked energetically around the guys, looking back and forth at the map and the beach.

"What do you think's out there? Chocolate candy, maybe?"

"Oh yeah, pirates would definitely say, 'Let's hide the most precious thing we have that won't go bad even after centuries - chocolate candy, of course!' " said Logan.

"Hmm, marmalade then?"

"Never mind, let's go look and find out," Kendall intervened. He opened the map and scratched the back of his head. "It's unclear, it looks like Spanish-"

"Give it to me." Logan snatched up the piece of parchment and laid it on the sand, then turned his back to the boys. "First we need to get here-" he poked at the upper left corner of the map with the red dot. "Palm Island."

"How do you know Spanish?" James was stunned.

"Magic." Logan swiped his phone over his head with the google translator running.

"Do you believe in unicorns, too?" Carlos asked.

The guys looked at him in bewilderment.

"All questions later, let's go look for palm trees!" Kendall concluded.

The boys quickly reached a patch of mighty trees (although Logan would argue that palm trees aren't trees), because there weren't many patches around. One, to be exact.

"What's next?" Kendall asked and looked at Logan, squinting at the piece of parchment in his hands.

"It's not the whole map."

"What do you mean?"

"The second part is apparently hidden somewhere around here."

"Let's dig!" Carlos had his hands shaped like a bucket and was already digging in the sand. "Wait, where do we dig?

"There's something else written here."

"Look for the continuation where the first palm tree, farthest from the others, begins. Go west as many paces as the bounty of a pirate who lost an eye in battle."

"How exciting, bandana time!" James solemnly put on one of the black and white armbands and spread his arms with his head held up proudly. "I'm a real pirate now!"

"And I'm the captain." Kendall straightened up and stepped forward.

"Then I'm the first mate." Carlos ran to Kendall and took his hand, both of them smiling confidently.

"Yeah, and I'm the ghost ship," Logan replied indifferently, not taking his eyes off the screen. "I googled the answer, two hundred Spanish dollars."

"Logan, you're ruining the atmosphere!" James was indignant.

Carlos nodded and crossed his arms resentfully. "This isn't fun."

"Come on, now. Unlike Logan, we're in for a real pirate ride." James suddenly put bandanas on them. "And we won't get a headache thanks to the fashionable pirate accessory."

"You didn't think about that when you were getting sunburned on the chaise lounge." Logan grinned.

"One more word and we won't give you the treasure. Carlos and James, raise your sabers!"

The boys blinked in bewilderment.

"Oh, right, we don't have any. Then pick up the… branches!" Kendall picked up the first stick from the sand and broke it into three pieces, handing one to Carlos and James each. "Come on, let's go. One, two, three."

"Four, five, six. How many more are there?"

"Seven, eight, nine, ten..." continued the "captain" with a heavy sigh. "One hundred and ninety more steps."

"That's a long time," Carlos wailed desperately.

"Eleven, twelve... Okay, I give up, Logan, turn on the pedometer."

"Should have had me do it right away." Logan smiled victoriously and started the app.

As soon as they arrived at their destination, Carlos dug like a hound dog. He didn't spare himself or anyone around him, hitting all the guys with sand (and getting a smack from James). Eventually he found a bottle with a fragment hidden in it.

"It's a-" Kendall began.

"No, run!"

The boys barely made it away from Carlos before shards were flying everywhere.

"Couldn't it be less traumatizing?" Logan was outraged. "Okay, let's see... The next location is northeast of here. Not far from the sea."

"Yay, we can swim!" Carlos exclaimed.

James walked over to him and gave him a hug. "Not now, friend, soon we'll be swimming in untold riches, not in this cold water." Both friends looked dreamily at the sky.

"Hey!" Kendall snapped his fingers and made them come to their senses. "Stop daydreaming, let's get to work!"

"You're boring," the boys snorted at the same time.

The drive to their destination was longer than the group had expected.

"I'm hungry," Carlos said, dreaming of hot, juicy corn dogs as they climbed out of the car.

"Let me guess, you're thinking about hot corn dogs even in this heat?"

"No, not at all!"

Logan ignored the sly tone. "I'm thirsty, this weather's driving me crazy."

"And my hair's all wet," James added, touching the lifeless style.

"Stop whining," Kendall said sharply. "We shouldn't give up and despair, because-"

"Because what?"

"I don't know! My brain refuses to work at forty degrees. I want a pink milkshake."

"I'd rather have a blue one," James objected.

"Pink tastes better!"

"Look!" Logan shouted. Everyone turned and saw a rock, like a mark on the map.

"Dig!" Carlos jumped on the poor boulder. He threw it farther than the laws of physics allowed and buried himself in the sand. "Ow, that's hot."

"Help, quick!" Kendall commanded, and all three of them rushed toward Carlos. With occasional hisses, they dug relentlessly.

James flicked his bangs for the tenth time in a few minutes. "Digging in hot sand is bad for your skin."

"Where was this research done?" Logan grinned.

"If scientists knew someone would want to dig in the hot sand, they would have done it!"

"I felt something."

"Carlos is right, there's a chest, let's dig!" Kendall exclaimed.

When the boys dug, the expression on their faces changed from one of joy to one of longing.

Carlos sighed dejectedly. "It's not a trunk, it's a little box."

"Maybe it's got money?" James asked.

"Yeah, definitely," Logan replied sarcastically. "It's closed, too."

"It won't be for long." James pulled a Hello Kitty barrette out of his hair and started picking the lock.

"Seriously?" Kendall chuckled. "Katie shouldn't have thrown those out after first grade, she would have been the most stylish."

Already purple from the sun, James blushed even more.

"There were no others on sale. And anyway, you can't see them under your hair, look." He frantically started to insert the item into his hair, but Logan intercepted it with a slight grimace of disgust.

"Never mind, let's get on with it."

When the box finally opened, Logan was sure he heard someone's obscene exclamation. It turned out that inside was just another piece of the map. After a detailed look at the piece of papyrus, a couple more uncultured phrases were uttered. On the clue was a stain.

"We don't even know if we're going the right way," Carlos whimpered.

"About right by my calculations," Logan said, as dry as he felt without water.

"I can't move from this spot anymore." James lay back down on the sand defiantly and jumped up like it was a hot frying pan. "Aye! All right, I'll move a bit."

"Come on, James, the treasure's close." Kendall patted his unapproachable companion on the shoulder. "Maybe you can afford that limited edition air conditioner."

"Conditioner, Kendall, hair conditioner!"

"Yeah, we aren't really needing an air conditioner right now," Logan said, wiping the sweat from his forehead. "Go?"

"Okay. Let's go." James brought his piece of stick to the center, and the other guys took up the action. "One for all and all for one."

"But a treasure to all!"

"Of course, Carlitos." Logan ruffled his friend's hair and smiled. It was a good thing James wasn't in Carlos's place. They walked a couple more kilometers, and then Logan heard his name. Was it a hallucination?

"Loga-an," or not. Carlos tugged at his shirt sleeve in embarrassment.

Suddenly Logan glowered and smiled. "Any guesses? Don't be shy, friend, any guesses are important!"

"Not really." The boy whispered something in his ear, after which Logan groaned disappointedly. "Go behind those bushes, you have two minutes at your disposal."

"Time it." Carlos started the timer and ran, unzipping his fly as he went.

While the boys waited, Logan couldn't stop thinking. He paced back and forth, glancing at the motionless people. "Do you think it might have something to do with the history of piracy? Or maybe with the first pirate on earth? Or with the life of pirates?"

"I doubt it," James answered.

"Don't push me!" Logan shrieked and moved even faster, his fingers interlocked at the back of his head.

"Calm down." Kendall put a hand on his shoulder, stopping his nervous gait. "You can do this, James and I believe in you. Try to think about something else, maybe the clue is closer than you think." The encouraging phrases made Logan calm down a little. He tried to take a deep breath, but nearly choked on the noise.

"Guys, guys, guys!"

"What?"

"I found the cross, where to dig. Come on, behind the bushes!"

"Yes, the treasure is close!" James rejoiced and moved forward with Kendall, but turned questioningly to Logan when he didn't budge.

"So you're not interested in what the riddle was about?"

"Let me think." Kendall assumed a philosopher's pose. "No, let's go!"

The leader grabbed Logan by the sleeve and ran vigorously, preventing him from taking a step on the ground.

"Come on, it's a new shirt…" was all he could say in frustration.

"Stop!" Carlos shouted, causing Kendall to slow down, and Logan, like dominoes, involuntarily stopped and grabbed his dizzy head. "Well?"

The culprit brought his index fingers together awkwardly. "I didn't have time to do something..."

The last part of the map had been found. The boys were heading southeast with their heads held high. The treasure awaited them there, marked on the map with a large black cross. The spirit of enthusiasm almost made the indignation put to the back burner, key word being "almost".

"Logan, why can't we just drink water from the sea? There's so much of it."

"Carlos, it doesn't work like that."

"Okay, come on," Kendall interrupted. "Let's dream about what our treasure will be like."

"Ice cream, lots of ice cream. And water." Carlos licked his lips.

"At least it wouldn't be corn dogs," Logan said. "Ideally, it's gems and ancient coins. We'll sell them and then we can buy whatever we want!"

"But I'm thirsty right now," James moaned. Carlos nodded sluggishly.

"All right, let's go in silence," Kendall said indignantly. "They're teasing."

The boys were getting closer and closer to their goal. James could already envision the bathroom shelves filled with Cuda: the brutal series, the summer series, the perfumed series, the charming series, if there was such a thing... And Mrs. Knight, who complains that she has nowhere to put her shampoos. But he'll deal with that.

Logan had a vision of a brand-new microscope where he could examine any object. Even the cookie crumbs Carlos had somehow left on his bed. Not the most pleasant of sensations, but right now Logan would prefer any bed, even one with crumbs. Just as long as he could lie down.

Kendall dreamed of a new APC-mobile, of a hockey stick signed by Matt Damba, and of that blue Transformer from the game department... Well, no one needs to know about the last one.

In their sweet reverie, the boys barely noticed when they reached their destination. They looked with shining eyes at the cross, so huge and beautiful. Only Logan immediately saw the pool and lounge chairs a little farther away. What is this area and where did this place come from...

"Gotcha!"

"Pirate!" Carlos shouted and tightened his helmet strap, already accelerating into a jogger's stance.

"I'm not a pirate, you stupid dogs."

Carlos braked sharply and fell like he'd slipped on a banana peel, but he was up in a flash. "Gustavo?!"

"That's him."

"It was his idea," Kelly added. "He took offense at your April Fool's joke and decided to get revenge."

"You tricked us." Carlos crossed his arms resentfully.

Logan stood in a complete stupor, still unaware of what was happening.

"Wait." Kendall held his head. "You drew this and buried it yourself just to play a prank?"

"No, he just came up with the map idea, and he left it up to me to realize it."

"Yes, Kelly helped me realize my brilliant prank, for which I am very grateful." Gustavo took the check in his hand and Kelly enthusiastically rubbed her palms, anticipating a generous bonus. When she looked at the document, her smile was replaced by a grimace of indignation. "Are those bills for parchment?"

"Yes, put them on the Rocque Records account as equipment expenses."

Logan glanced over to Kendall, who was grinning slyly, and then to the other boys and Kelly. They all looked too chipper and cheerful, so Gustavo frowned.

"Just try-" too late. The heavy body hit the water surface and bobbed. Like an upside-down bug, Gustavo moved his limbs faster than possible, but he couldn't get up. To the chuckles of the boys and Kelly, he stared up suspiciously calmly. "Did I ever tell you guys I hate you?"

"Yes, many times," replied the still smiling Carlos.

"I'll say it again: I HATE YOU! You're finished!"

"We love you too, Gustavo." Kendall grinned and dived into the pool with the guys. They flipped the boss around until an innocent joke turned into eight hours of harmonies. "Kelly, will you write us a check as moral compensation?"

"I think we could all use a bonus."

"You wish! You'll be working like hounds after your vacation!"

The guys wanted to object, but they saw bottles by the deck chairs and raced to them. Having drunk enough, they continued to relax by the pool with the producer. He didn't seem to interfere. True, after half an hour he snored loudly, but at least he didn't shout.

"We found the treasure," Carlos exclaimed, looking at the written check with a strawberry cone in his other hand. "Yo-ho-ho!"

The boys nodded happily and raised their horns in victory. "Yo-ho-ho!"