October 2, 1997

My whole body still felt like one very large, angry bruise, but there were no marks to prove the impressiveness of it to others except for the ones on my knees after I had hit the floor when Yaxley tortured me. I was tempted to slump to the floor in front of the office while I was waiting for Susanna Waldope to arrive. I hoped she could not see the signs of torture upon me, I was not sure I was ready to tell Lucinda yet, but I would have too in order to explain why I was no longer in the Minister's Office. Lucinda would probably want to kill Yaxley for the offense, but we had too much to gain with Yaxley alive, at least he was an animal we could understand, I was not sure who or what would replace him if Lucinda poisoned him.

When I had gotten out of bed, the ache I thought was gone had moved to my legs, the feeling of claws digging on the inside of my hips that dragged slowly across the bone, scraping away at it layer by layer with the knowledge I could do nothing to alleviate it. I had managed to clamber out of bed in the following minutes, making quiet, whimpering noises at the pain of it all. Upon standing, my legs had immediately given out beneath me sending me straight to the floor as an indescribable ache moved up my body.

Percy's panicked rush into the room wearing a towel and bubbles of shampoo in his hair was not a good start to the day.

The sound of the office door opening snapped me back to the present.

It had been some time since I had seen Susanna Waldrope, both the Head of the Administrative Department and one of our co-conspirators. She had been feeding Lucinda general updates from throughout the Ministry, rumors that I could not hear due to my previous posting, and had managed to transfer her husband Albert from Magical Games and Sports to a larger department not even two weeks ago. The woman sat in the heart of a web of interdepartmental chatter only made stronger by the forced hiring of silly husband hunting daughters and nieces by the pureblood supremacists who now ran the Ministry. Susanna's senior staff members complained to her regularly, with Susanna's encouragement.

"Audrey?" Susanna's curly dark hair was pulled away from her face, stray curls doing their best to fully escape while her glasses slid down her nose. "Why are you here?"

I glanced around the empty hallway, making sure no one was nearby.

"My services are no longer required by the Minister's Office. Yaxley told me to see you for reassignment."

Susanna blinked. She opened a memo that was in her hand that I had not noticed her holding.

"Oh. Well, that's what this was about then." She opened the door wider, "Come on in."

Susanna had a very quiet office, beige carpet contrasting with vibrant South African paintings of wildlife and villages. It was personal in a way that ran contrast to the general way offices looked in government facilities, administrative departments had a little more leeway in some instances that more… not professional, but back door and viewed as more important offices by people of power and influence.

Admins ran the schedule and access though, I would argue that was more useful.

"Yaxley doesn't want you anywhere important," Susanna cast a few spells on the door and threw the memo into the garbage bin. "He thinks you'll go telling tales to the MACUSA Embassy."

I shrugged, "I was holding onto that job by a thread anyway."

"True. I might have an idea or two, but you really don't need to be seen out and about right now."

"Do I look that bad?" I felt horrid, but I looked normal and unbothered when I left for the Ministry this morning.

"No, but this is putting a target on your back by upper management."

Umbridge. Yaxley. And those were the two I could be sure about.

Susanna flicked her wand at the door another couple of times, double checking her spells. "Listen, I'll talk to Lucinda. As bad as this is for you, this is a great opportunity for us, but you need to lay low for a couple of days and I need some stuff… sorted in the closet."

Ah, that was interesting.

"What kind of sorting?"

"Old personnel files." There was something in Susanna's words that I caught onto very quickly. "Some new ones. The old ones need to go, the new ones need to go into the cabinets."

"Will you let me out to eat?"

"I'll bring you a sandwich."

My day was spent in a closet next to going through paper copies of various collections of information. Financial records. Old payroll record copies. Some new payroll information from the finance office. Soon, I was finding and reading the old files of Ministry staff members, people who I recognized as missing or confirmed dead and taking away the information to add to what we already knew and confirm what we believed to know. The task was relatively boring, but nobody was willing to bother me, most probably assuming Susanna was punishing me instead of rewarding me with a bit of peace and quiet while she planned on what to do with me.

Papers that I claimed to destroy or vanish were instead copied and hidden away in my expanded bag. I did not want to risk setting off any charms in the Atrium if I tried to leave with them, I was sure my clearance was being revoked and despelled as I sat in this closet.

A few hours later, Susanna did bring me two sandwiches, some snacks and a very watery coffee that only reminded me I had left my coffee press in the Minister's Staff Office breakroom.

Damn.

I knew Percy would never use it.

I bet Yaxley destroyed it.

Oo0Oo0

Percy was kind enough to inform me that Yaxley had, indeed, destroyed my coffee press.

The pettiness of evil would never cease to surprise me.

After being told this horrible fact, I elected to go to Lucinda's for dinner to pass on what had transpired yesterday and my new situation at work. I was greeted by the Carter girls who told me Lucinda was in her office and Kitty was dragging me to the dining room before I could escape to see my great-aunt.

The number of children in the house was fairly small, I knew Tavish had been out fighting Snatchers while tracking down muggle-borns himself. I knew very little of his successes or failures in that regard. Lucinda had told me that was on a need to know basis, but if anything happened to her I could find out everything I needed to continue the mission. Hopefully it would not come to that.

Tinsy was setting up a nice dinner for the four children we had, the three Carter daughters and Gavin Briar, who had arrived a few days ago. Baby Grace was in her high chair looking around contentedly as Kitty talked up a storm while Gavin piled his plate high.

From my understanding, Gavin had tried to stab Albert with a fork, thinking he was a Snatcher. Tavish was far more impressed that the kid had managed to keep his wand with him through the last month. I did not know much more about his background.

I tried to prod Eleanor into speaking of her study into magic. I had been meaning to come down and teach her some simple spells, but I wanted to wait for another school aged child to show up because it was less lonely and isolating to have someone to study with. Eleanor was not a chatty girl, she was quiet and responsible by nature but everything in her life seemed to have left her as a bit of a shell of herself. I was hoping that having some other children aside from her sisters would open her up a bit and Gavin seemed to be starting that a bit-

My thoughts were interrupted as Tavish staggered into the downstairs dining room where the children were eating, hauling with him two girls as he bled from a large open cut on his upper arm.

"Got two more!" Tavish patted the smaller girl on the head before collapsing into a padded chair next to the door with a deflating sigh of exhaustion.

"Merlin's beard, Tavish!" I shouted, almost dropping the plate I was holding before collecting myself to go tend his wounds. I looked at the girls who were staring at the scene. "You two eat, I'll take care of him."

The older girl nodded, I did not think she was older than sixteen, and hustled her sister over to the table where Tinsy quickly set a place for them to spoon out some salad and vegetables to start. I pulled out my wand and began to tend to Tavish with quickly uttered healing spells, ignoring his wincing and complaining about my technique.

"Don't get hit next time," I retorted as the cut began to seal itself closed, stitching itself like a needle through cloth. "There's a potion for pain and muscle recovery in the medicine cabinet that you should take."

"Cannae, makes me sleep an' I gotta check sommat."

I put my hands on my hips, pursing my lips together tightly. "Send Albert and Barry then, because you're not going."

Tavish shot me a look that would have peeled paint.

I glared back at him, putting my hands on his shoulders to keep him in his seat while giving him a look I had seen grace my father's face, something hard and angry. When I spoke, my voice was low and brokered no room for arguments from the infirm. "Stay here."

There was a new voice, one unfamiliar to me coming just out of my line of sight from the dining room table. "He was brilliant!"

I turned to find the teenage girl Tavish had brought in, she had an air of liveliness to her mannerisms and sparkling green eyes under a tangled mess of chestnut hair. She was holding her plate and eating quickly in her efforts to defend Tavish from my temper and replenish herself. I waited politely for her to continue. She was a girl of fairly standard build, a bit stocky but average, and was pale with dark shadows under her eyes from what I presumed to be a lack of sleep.

"He came out of nowhere! Just grabbed the Snatcher and started beating him with his bare hands!"

"Twas nuthin', 'e 'ad it comin'." There was a dark look in Tavish's eyes that disappeared as he smiled at the girl as if trying to hide it from her.

I noticed for the first time the bruises and cuts on Tavish's large hands, the marks of a close, physical beating. He was such a sweet man, what pushed him to a physical brawl? The easiest thing in that moment became taking his hands in mine and beginning to repair the cuts, scrapes and bruises that lined through his knuckles like a macabre art.

There was no way his opponent came out of that fight looking presentable.

I was going to ask about this later.

"Then this old house elf beat back the other Snatcher who had a hold on my sister!"

There was a slight shuffling sound from the direction of the table. Barry had returned to work immediately from his job with Tavish, appearing no worse for wear for the encounter and immediately turning his attention to his favorite foundling, baby Grace who he was presenting an offering in the form of a bottle of warm milk with muttered hellos the the enthusiastic Carter daughters

"Aye," Tavish added, taking the attention off his rescue of the older girl. "'hat's Barry, fierce and makes some of da finest scones in da country!"

Barry uttered an embarrassed thank you as he continued to smile and coo at the baby in a way that reminded me of a doting grandfather. I had a hard time reconciling the contrasting images presented of my great-aunt's house elf, a stern disciplinarian to a very independent Tinsy, a quiet efficient worker who preferred to work in unoccupied corners of the house, and this image of someone who clearly really loved babies.

"Barry threw da Snatchers back with a snap of his fingers! 'hey're probably still in that loch!"

I could not help but join in the raucous laughter of the children at the image Tavish presented as he waved his arms around to emphasize the point.

The rest of the dinner was an excited chatter. I discovered the older of the two girl's name was Joy Horner, she was due to sit her O.W.L.s this year if she had not had to go on the run. Her sister's name was Estelle, aged nine. Their mother was a muggle, their father was muggle-born and had apparently put up a fight when the Ministry came to arrest him, the girls had managed to get away, but their parents were killed in the process. Joy and Estelle had stayed with some other Muggle-born students until they had gone on the run again just a week ago when Joy noticed a mysterious figure lurking around the place. The group had split to better their chances of escape. Tavish had agreed to try and find the rest of Joy and Estelle's original group because of all of the information she had been able to give him about them, the original location and where they had said where they would try to go next.

Gavin Briar, a small eleven year old boy with an olive complexion and big brown eyes that were not larger than his stomach, was now filling his second plate. I wondered where the small boy put all of that food. Did he actually have a second stomach or was he just the container for an endless black hole?

"I heard a rumor that some of the other muggle-borns I went to school with managed to fake their family trees to go to school and not be hunted." Joy had placed her silverware on the now empty plate and leaned back in her chair. "The Creevey brothers apparently tried to be sneaky, they're clever like that, but it didn't work and we parted ways a few days ago."

Estelle nodded, following her sister's lead as Grace was removed from her highchair by Tinsy to be given to Tavish who immediately clutched the baby like a lifeline, patting her back and bouncing her on his knee periodically.

"It's true! Colin hit a Snatcher with a-a… What was it called?!"

"Fanged frisbee," Joy clarified. "Said he bought it from the Weasley shop last year. Better than the fireworks his brother was preparing."

Tavish chuckled darkly, "Those boys still takin' orders?"

"The Weasley twins? I hope so, I heard they've gone into hiding and I bet they're still sending stuff to Hogwarts."

I stood up to get the children's attention. "Tinsy, why don't you take this crowd up and show Joy and Estelle their room?"

"Yes Miss Graves!"

"Please call me Audrey."

We had this discussion on a regular basis. I was sure she did it to annoy me.

The children scrambled out of the room after Tinsy while Barry cleared the table with a snap of his fingers, as if nothing had ever been there at all. He joined the crowd to make sure those he viewed as guests would not be in need of anything he could provide.

"Yeh need ta know," Tavish said quietly as the children left the room, making noise as they climbed the stairs, leaving the two of us alone with the baby, Tavish continuing to bounce her in his lap after she loosed a happy belch.

"Know what? What happened out there?"

"The Snatchers are animals." He paused, the dark rage coming over his face again. "Death Eaters will jus' kill ya, but Snatchers want money and muggle-born's ain't people anymore."

"Tavish," my voice was slow and quiet as the footsteps of the herd of children and house elves grew muffled and barely audible on the stairs and landings above, fading quickly to soundlessness as various charms and spells against noise took effect. "What happened out there?"

Tavish made a noise that was somewhere between a groan and a snarl of rage that not even the presence of a chubby, babbling baby could calm. "Ya dun need three men for two small lassies…"

"They only mentioned two?"

"Da third was by the loch. Waiting. I got'em first." Tavish looked at me coldly as he bounced Grace slightly to adjust his grip on her. "They were talkin' about their… plans for the older one. Ya ken?"

The cold dread that settled over me made me sick.

"Yes sir."

"Good. She don't need ta know."

No. I would never tell her. Tavish already had her affections for what he did, I would not taint Joy's memory of his heroism with the more commonplace darkness of humanity. Joy did not need the full story, the war would already force her to be an adult, I wanted these children to grow up and have some of that naivety in them, to not become bitter and cynical before their time.

"I wondered sometimes wha' Alistair thought before he was killed, an' I think I understand now."

"What do you mean?" Tavish never really spoke of his son and Elspeth, the daughter-in-law he almost had.

"There is… peace innit. Da fightin'. Da risk in dyin' and how da fear makes ya smarter and faster… Ta risk dyin' protectin' another person."

There was something under that horrific statement. An open wound I was not sure I was able to understand, after all, I had never had a child, but to bury one's own must be an untouchable hell.

"Or kill ta save a child…" Tavish held Grace a little tighter, using her as a link to his own humanity in that moment.

I did not know it came to that.

"You're a good man Tavish," I took his hand gently in my own. "Alistair learned it from you."

Tavish looked at me with an unreadable expression, something abashed and disbelieving in a way while Grace babbled happily in his lap.

"I don't think Alistair died with regrets."

"That's why dun want ya out there."

I tilted my head slightly.

That dark look was back in Tavish's eyes. "Can ya take a life?"

"I- I'm sorry?"

"Can ya see yer enemy as a monster? A nothin'?"

There was something old and timeless in the question, a question that had been asked a thousand times in similar circumstances to the young who were willing to risk everything for a future they may never see.

The silence from me answered Tavish's question.

My grandfather said I was not a good duelist, the common agreement between him and my teachers at Ilvermorny was that I was not ruthless. I never saw my opponents as something to overcome, I always saw my cousin Quincy or whoever my partner was that day. How embarrassing to be a Graves made of soft dirt and not hard stone.

"Don't stain yer soul with the lives of small, petty fools."

I was not sure what to say to that. Tavish had killed a man tonight and a look of pride and sudden understanding had darkened him in a way I could barely perceive. I had grown up around people who had gone to war. My grandfather Atticus, his sister Armista and grandma Ophelia always had a hard look to them at times. Distant stares, eyes on the doors and backs to the wall as if an attack could come at any time. Maybe that was why my father was the way he was, why my family turned out the way it did. Generations of trauma, war and the aftermath of it had left scars on those who had never seen that level of conflict.

I could now see that same ghost of an expression on Tavish that my grandfather wore in quiet moments and it twisted my soul with icy hands. Perhaps I was naive to the realities of resistance and the choices of a mostly unspoken war, but Tavish was the best of men, able to love and console a grieving child and protect someone with violence as needed.

There was something else that nibbled at the back of my mind. Something that left me full of a cold dread that I could not put out into the world in case it became an acknowledged, potential reality… How deeply involved was Alex in the atrocities of the Death Eaters?

"Are you going back out?"

"Few minutes." He bounced Grace slightly on his knee and smiled at her as he moved her hair out of her face while she went to grab his fingers. "Jus' waitin' on Barry ta finish up. We're meetin' Albert later tonight. Gonna try an' find Joy's friends."

I hesitated for a moment before leaning forward and kissing Tavish on the cheek. "Please get some rest."

Tavish looked at me with a tired kind of smile.

I'm going to fix this.

I can't reconnect a man's soul, but I can ensure he never needs to carry the burden alone.

As I walked up the stairs, I could hear the laughter of the children at some of Tinsy's more child friendly antics as she juggled things around the room, giving a warmth and ambience to whatever room the sisters had been moved into. I could hear Gavin's voice distinctly as he asked Joy to help him learn the levitation charm he had been studying, Eleanor chiming in, her voice surprising to my ears as she had barely spoken in the weeks she had been here, her time as the responsible eldest child carrying over into her place of safety.

If this went well today, I could find someone to teach the children regularly, someone who could help with this growing population while Percy and I came in the evenings to help and hand over our new information to Lucinda. My great-aunt was a wonderful teacher, but I imagined the strain of maintaining a public existence to be above suspicion was not an ideal combination.

Lucinda's office door loomed large in front of me, but I was no longer frightened by it. This was just the place she lived these days with her account books and war maps, her notes on the shifting socio-political powers of the government and those families she had to socialize with in order to not be suspicious.

I knocked four times on the door, opening the door at Lucinda's bidding and spared no time for niceties and convention as I stepped into the dimly lit room, the brightest magelights were over Lucinda's desk as she worked and calculated.

"We can do so much more than what we're doing."

Lucinda looked up at me as I closed her office door behind me and stepped into the room. Lucinda's office was as pristine as ever, as if it were untouched by human hands as a remnant to an older time in old wood and beautifully bound books and paintings on the wall.

My great-aunt paused at her desk, a few strands of gray hair falling back into her face from her prim bun. There were shadows of exhaustion under her eyes and ink stains on her fingers.

"Please, enlighten me." The sarcasm of the statement was audible, but I was going to ignore it.

"We're collecting information and only sending out Tavish and Albert to handle the matter." I paused. "They're doing so well, but I think that maybe… Well… Percy and I are fairly restless-"

"No."

"Tavish can't do this with only one person to help him!"

"He says he'll manage."

"Can you?"

Lucinda paused, peering up at me over the rims of her glasses.

"These older children like Eleanor and Gavin need to be taught magic, one of the girls who just arrived was supposed to sit her O.W.L.s this year. There are too many for one on one education, especially with all the younger ones running around too. Eleanor and Gavin have wands and a couple of hours a day is not enough to teach them real magic. If we're going to keep rescuing children, then we need to be ready to educate them so they won't look like idiots when they return to Hogwarts." I stepped forward. "It's not just a matter of keeping them alive, we need to teach them to protect themselves in case we can't anymore."

Lucinda leaned back in her chair, "I've been working on that same idea. Don't look at me like that, I'm as used to probabilities and potential issues as you are."

"Then why are we still running on a skeleton crew when we have able bodies to help?"

"We've been over this."

"I'm not going to go around monologuing in the dark!"

"Your father is the president of MACUSA, if the Averys, or that bampot Yaxley, ever let that secret out then you're going to be the best tool available to get information from these people. You'll be a perfect bargaining chip to establish trust. I need you to help me get every detail on those who are complicit that we can."

Lucinda had a point, but I was still angry.

"You do realize I'm no longer in the Minister's office, right?"

"What?" Lucinda reeled back in surprise, "Are you hurt?"

"Yaxley tortured me yesterday, I'm alright though. The pain's worn off."

That was mostly true. My legs had hurt throughout the day and occasional headaches would leave me gasping and grateful I spent the day working alone in a closet.

"Yaxley figured it out."

"Damn."

"He's not going to talk about it, that's his leverage over me."

"Well," Lucinda sighed, "I'm surprised you lasted as long as you did. I didn't expect that to last forever."

Despite this, an idea crossed my mind

"What if I find people to help Tavish? Unknown to you, cleared by me and Tavish? People who are not doing anything related to work due to the war?"

Lucinda raised an eyebrow.

"It keeps you safe. It means Tavish and Albert can split their duties with other people. We can cover more ground to get information and help more people."

"It sounds like you already have some people in mind."

An image of Oliver crossed my mind. "There is a condition, but it is beneficial to what we're doing here as a long term project."

Lucinda stood up and looked out the window to the grounds, watching the three crows who liked one of the trees close to the house. Her hands were behind her back, thoughtful and commanding, like a Chief Auror surveying her troops before a raid.

"Name your price."

"Her name is Katie, she just graduated from Hogwarts. Bringing her here ensures you have someone to help teach the school aged children regularly and another adult on the premises to help hide the children in case someone comes by unannounced. If you don't want Percy and I going on raids we'll be happy to help with teaching after work."

I watched the stiffening of Lucinda's shoulders as she shifted her weight and seemed to physically sigh without making a sound.

"Let me speak with her before she comes into my home. We do need help." Lucinda paused. "I've been trying to plan ways to start moving some of the children and anyone else who wants to get out of the country, but I'm afraid we'll lose track of the children entirely and I'm sure the borders are being watched."

"What about portkeys?"

"I'm afraid of us or our allies in other countries being compromised and us losing the children entirely for bad intelligence. We would need stronger security." Lucinda laughed dryly. "I've always been afraid of letting things go."

"So you need to double check safe zones on foreign soil?"

"Right, Portkeys only travel so far, I need to clear a house in France and have a very tight schedule to lower the risk of being compromised."

"So, you need someone to watch and secure the location?"

"I need someone to stay there and do that. They'll be safe, but they need to be able to manage the Portkeys."

"Like a lighthouse keeper?"

"Exactly."

"Send Katie then."

This did not sound like a pleasant job, but it would keep Oliver from worrying, even if it would part them from one another. Somehow, under these conditions, the sacrifice seemed very reasonable.

"Then we'll have to create more hiding places in the house."

Lucinda smiled, "There are places in this house that I promise you have never discovered."

She gestured to the muggle painted picture of my mother, her golden hair falling like a curtain past her shoulders as she stared outwards into the office, unblinking and beautiful for a woman frozen in time. It took me a moment to comprehend that we had very similar faces, I could see more of Jack in my nose and cheeks and the color of my hair, but the rest was all Lucina and it was such an odd thing to realize how much of one's family could be carried with a person merely by their face.

"Um…" I looked back at Lucinda who just continued to smile.

"Don't ask any questions. I'll only lie to you."

"Understandable."

"I have a new task for you."

"Hm?"

"You're going to have a lot of opportunities to explore the Ministry, do you think you can get into the Department of Mysteries?"

The corners of my mouth turned upwards, "I'll see what I can do."

Oo0Oo0

Author's Note: I based the post torture feeling from the start of the chapter on post panic attack pains and the period pain I lived with for ten years. Easy to describe, deeply weird and very bruisy. I'm much better now, but I would love to be formally confirmed for endometriosis because I am very sure I know where it's living.

As much as I like the idea of the Creevey brothers faking their papers for school, the idea of these two lunatics wreaking havoc in the wild is a lot of fun too.

I'm very glad I split this chapter and the previous one. This all would have been too much for a single chapter.